1
00:00:03,022 --> 00:00:05,436
So Sheldon, there's something I've
been wanting to talk about
2
00:00:05,437 --> 00:00:07,337
but I know it's
kind of a touchy subject.
3
00:00:07,339 --> 00:00:09,540
Way to narrow it down
to everything.
4
00:00:11,110 --> 00:00:12,543
What is it?
5
00:00:12,545 --> 00:00:13,877
Well, your birthday's coming up.
6
00:00:13,879 --> 00:00:15,078
And you've never
let us celebrate it.
7
00:00:15,080 --> 00:00:17,014
And I was hoping maybe
this year we could.
8
00:00:17,016 --> 00:00:20,317
Oh, I suppose that's
a discussion we could have.
9
00:00:24,990 --> 00:00:27,157
Okay, great, I mean,
10
00:00:27,159 --> 00:00:29,760
it doesn't have to be
a big party or anything.
11
00:00:29,762 --> 00:00:31,962
I was just...
12
00:00:34,166 --> 00:00:35,899
Where'd he go?
13
00:00:35,901 --> 00:00:37,067
W-Wait a minute.
14
00:00:37,069 --> 00:00:39,469
You mention his birthday
and he vanishes?
15
00:00:39,471 --> 00:00:42,773
Well, where's that information
been this whole time?
16
00:00:43,843 --> 00:00:47,477
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
17
00:00:47,479 --> 00:00:50,814
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
18
00:00:50,816 --> 00:00:52,449
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
19
00:00:52,451 --> 00:00:54,985
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
20
00:00:54,987 --> 00:00:57,654
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
21
00:00:57,656 --> 00:01:00,324
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
22
00:01:00,326 --> 00:01:02,226
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
23
00:01:02,228 --> 00:01:03,827
♪ Bang! ♪
24
00:01:03,829 --> 00:01:07,829
♪ The Big Bang Theory 9x17 ♪
The Celebration Experimentation
Original Air Date on Febr
25
00:01:07,830 --> 00:01:11,630
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
26
00:01:15,039 --> 00:01:16,672
Well, where is he?
27
00:01:16,674 --> 00:01:17,806
Sheldon?
28
00:01:17,808 --> 00:01:18,841
I'll check his room.
29
00:01:18,843 --> 00:01:20,175
Surprise!
(both scream)
30
00:01:20,177 --> 00:01:21,310
Oh, my God!
31
00:01:21,312 --> 00:01:23,279
Just one example
32
00:01:23,281 --> 00:01:25,881
of how birthdays
can be terrible.
33
00:01:25,883 --> 00:01:28,150
Now, can we please
34
00:01:28,152 --> 00:01:29,518
drop this subject
and pick a new one?
35
00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:32,054
Yeah, I suggest
“how thick can a soup get
36
00:01:32,056 --> 00:01:33,556
before it becomes a stew?”
37
00:01:33,558 --> 00:01:35,991
You know, the answer,
it may surprise you.
38
00:01:35,993 --> 00:01:38,861
I'm sorry I brought it up.
39
00:01:38,863 --> 00:01:40,095
Yeah, what is the problem?
40
00:01:40,097 --> 00:01:41,130
Is it about getting older?
41
00:01:41,132 --> 00:01:43,566
Please, look at this
porcelain skin.
42
00:01:43,568 --> 00:01:46,368
I'm like a human sink.
43
00:01:47,672 --> 00:01:51,574
But it's the one day a year
that's just all about you.
44
00:01:51,576 --> 00:01:53,542
One day.
(laughs)
45
00:01:56,881 --> 00:01:58,147
Right.
46
00:02:00,084 --> 00:02:02,051
Can you please just tell me why?
47
00:02:02,053 --> 00:02:05,120
Fine.
48
00:02:05,122 --> 00:02:07,289
As you know,
I have a twin sister
49
00:02:07,291 --> 00:02:09,792
with whom I obviously
share a birthday.
50
00:02:09,794 --> 00:02:11,827
Every year we'd
have a party.
51
00:02:11,829 --> 00:02:13,395
No one I invited
would ever come,
52
00:02:13,397 --> 00:02:14,830
because they didn't like me.
53
00:02:15,967 --> 00:02:17,566
I'm sorry.
54
00:02:17,568 --> 00:02:18,801
Oh, that part wasn't so bad.
55
00:02:18,803 --> 00:02:20,002
I didn't like them, either.
56
00:02:20,004 --> 00:02:21,670
But then I'd inevitably spend
57
00:02:21,672 --> 00:02:25,240
the whole day being tortured
by my sister's friends.
58
00:02:25,242 --> 00:02:27,142
Oh, you poor thing.
59
00:02:27,144 --> 00:02:29,478
When I was six, they told me
Batman was coming to my party.
60
00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:31,347
I waited by the
door for hours.
61
00:02:31,349 --> 00:02:33,382
Closest thing
to Batman I saw
62
00:02:33,384 --> 00:02:35,618
was when a robin
flew into the window.
63
00:02:37,388 --> 00:02:40,055
You realize none of those things
would happen now?
64
00:02:40,057 --> 00:02:41,957
I do, but why do you care
65
00:02:41,959 --> 00:02:44,093
if I celebrate
my birthday at all?
66
00:02:44,095 --> 00:02:47,296
Well, you made
my last birthday so memorable,
67
00:02:47,298 --> 00:02:49,264
I wanted to return the favor.
68
00:02:49,266 --> 00:02:50,432
PENNY:
Yeah, if you had
69
00:02:50,434 --> 00:02:51,900
a party now, you
have plenty of friends
70
00:02:51,902 --> 00:02:53,102
that would love to come.
71
00:02:53,104 --> 00:02:54,703
And we live here,
so we have no choice.
72
00:02:54,705 --> 00:02:56,739
Yeah.
73
00:02:57,975 --> 00:02:59,241
Very well.
74
00:02:59,243 --> 00:03:01,210
You may celebrate my life
by throwing a party
75
00:03:01,212 --> 00:03:04,279
with cake, presents and a
shower of admiration and love.
76
00:03:04,281 --> 00:03:06,482
But then you owe me big-time.
77
00:03:08,986 --> 00:03:11,086
You have any idea
what you're getting
78
00:03:11,088 --> 00:03:12,488
Sheldon for his birthday?
79
00:03:12,490 --> 00:03:14,657
He's been fascinated
with dinosaurs lately.
80
00:03:14,659 --> 00:03:16,025
Maybe we could get him a fossil.
81
00:03:16,027 --> 00:03:18,027
Well, just don't
get anything Jurassic.
82
00:03:18,029 --> 00:03:21,497
He feels like that whole chunk
of time has gone Hollywood.
83
00:03:23,134 --> 00:03:25,434
Hey, uh, you know,
84
00:03:25,436 --> 00:03:28,103
he told a sad story
about how his sister
85
00:03:28,105 --> 00:03:31,407
tricked him into thinking Batman
was coming to his party.
86
00:03:31,409 --> 00:03:32,741
That's funny.
87
00:03:32,743 --> 00:03:34,510
Let's do that.
88
00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:38,013
Maybe we could get Batman
to actually show up.
89
00:03:38,015 --> 00:03:40,616
You mean, some guy
in a lame suit?
90
00:03:40,618 --> 00:03:42,885
Or a real Batman.
Hey, Stuart?
91
00:03:42,887 --> 00:03:45,454
Didn't you try to get Adam West
to do a signing here once?
92
00:03:45,456 --> 00:03:47,956
Yeah, but there was kind of
a scheduling conflict.
93
00:03:47,958 --> 00:03:50,893
He, uh, wanted to know
when he'd get paid.
94
00:03:50,895 --> 00:03:52,828
And I wouldn't tell him.
95
00:03:54,298 --> 00:03:56,231
Can I get his contact info?
96
00:03:56,233 --> 00:03:58,634
Sure, uh, but
just so you know,
97
00:03:58,636 --> 00:03:59,968
he's kind of a diva.
98
00:03:59,970 --> 00:04:01,837
He is?
Oh, yeah.
99
00:04:01,839 --> 00:04:02,938
Won't take the bus.
100
00:04:02,940 --> 00:04:04,239
He won't pack his own lunch.
101
00:04:04,241 --> 00:04:07,710
Won't let you spend
the night on his couch.
102
00:04:09,847 --> 00:04:12,915
Okay, so how do you feel
about party balloons?
103
00:04:12,917 --> 00:04:14,550
Uh, Mylar balloons, yes.
104
00:04:14,552 --> 00:04:16,151
Latex balloons, no.
105
00:04:16,153 --> 00:04:18,287
Water balloons,
I will jump off the roof
106
00:04:18,289 --> 00:04:20,489
and aim for your car.
107
00:04:21,492 --> 00:04:23,592
All right, what about music?
108
00:04:23,594 --> 00:04:24,993
I enjoy marching bands
109
00:04:24,995 --> 00:04:27,730
and Tibetan throat singing.
110
00:04:27,732 --> 00:04:29,164
No music it is.
111
00:04:30,434 --> 00:04:31,767
What kind of cake
do you like?
112
00:04:31,769 --> 00:04:34,703
Well, my favorite is chocolate
with strawberry frosting,
113
00:04:34,705 --> 00:04:36,572
three layers,
and if there's
114
00:04:36,574 --> 00:04:38,340
writing on it,
make sure it's not all caps.
115
00:04:38,342 --> 00:04:41,844
I don't need my dessert
yelling at me.
116
00:04:43,848 --> 00:04:46,915
Hey, so what was
Adam West like on the phone?
117
00:04:46,917 --> 00:04:48,217
Uh, nice guy.
118
00:04:48,219 --> 00:04:49,918
But it was a little weird
to hear Batman say,
119
00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:53,856
“Don't ring the doorbell
or my poodles will go crazy.”
120
00:04:53,858 --> 00:04:56,859
You know, Adam West
is my favorite Batman?
121
00:04:56,861 --> 00:04:58,160
Well,
122
00:04:58,162 --> 00:05:00,496
after Michael Keaton,
Christian Bale
123
00:05:00,498 --> 00:05:02,731
and Batman from
The Lego Movie.
124
00:05:04,001 --> 00:05:05,300
Don't say that to him.
125
00:05:05,302 --> 00:05:07,669
What?
He beat out George Clooney.
126
00:05:07,671 --> 00:05:08,670
And that's something.
127
00:05:08,672 --> 00:05:11,039
Like, I love me
some Clooney.
128
00:05:11,041 --> 00:05:13,442
Don't say that to anyone.
129
00:05:15,679 --> 00:05:18,046
Thank you so much
for helping us, Stuart.
130
00:05:18,048 --> 00:05:19,748
Oh, I-I was just
131
00:05:19,750 --> 00:05:21,416
glad to be invited.
132
00:05:21,418 --> 00:05:24,453
To be honest, I don't always
feel like I'm part of the group.
133
00:05:24,455 --> 00:05:25,621
Okay, sweetie,
we're on the clock here.
134
00:05:25,623 --> 00:05:28,123
Can you hate yourself
and frost at the same time?
135
00:05:28,125 --> 00:05:29,424
(door opens)
136
00:05:29,426 --> 00:05:31,960
Hello, I hope I'm not too early.
137
00:05:31,962 --> 00:05:32,895
No, no, no. Come on in.
138
00:05:32,897 --> 00:05:35,464
And how is the radiant
mommy-to-be?
139
00:05:35,466 --> 00:05:36,932
Doing great.
140
00:05:36,934 --> 00:05:38,967
Y-You're pregnant?
141
00:05:38,969 --> 00:05:39,935
Yeah.
142
00:05:39,937 --> 00:05:41,937
Sounds like something
143
00:05:41,939 --> 00:05:44,907
a member of the group
might know.
144
00:05:44,909 --> 00:05:46,175
Yeah, birthday party first.
145
00:05:46,177 --> 00:05:48,243
Pity party later.
146
00:05:50,815 --> 00:05:52,047
Are you crazy?
147
00:05:52,049 --> 00:05:53,749
How can you put Michael Keaton
148
00:05:53,751 --> 00:05:56,084
in front of Christian Bale?
149
00:05:56,086 --> 00:05:58,253
Oh, please.
150
00:06:00,224 --> 00:06:03,725
Even my poodles know
Bale's overrated.
151
00:06:03,727 --> 00:06:05,794
Thank you!
152
00:06:05,796 --> 00:06:07,696
That's why I say
Keaton's number one.
153
00:06:07,698 --> 00:06:09,364
He brought a sense
of humor to the role.
154
00:06:09,366 --> 00:06:11,466
Oh, if you're gonna
factor in a sense of humor,
155
00:06:11,468 --> 00:06:14,636
then I should be
at the top of the list.
156
00:06:14,638 --> 00:06:17,472
It should be me,
157
00:06:17,474 --> 00:06:18,607
Keaton, Kilmer,
158
00:06:18,609 --> 00:06:20,242
Lego, Bale,
159
00:06:20,244 --> 00:06:22,444
and that pretty boy Clooney.
160
00:06:24,014 --> 00:06:26,181
Really?
161
00:06:26,183 --> 00:06:27,749
You're ahead of Bale?
162
00:06:27,751 --> 00:06:29,718
The man who personified
the words,
163
00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:32,754
(deep voice):
“I'm Batman.”
164
00:06:32,756 --> 00:06:34,356
I never had to say I'm Batman.
165
00:06:34,358 --> 00:06:35,557
I showed up.
166
00:06:35,559 --> 00:06:38,026
People knew I was Batman.
167
00:06:39,296 --> 00:06:41,697
Everywhere I went--
on the TV show,
168
00:06:41,699 --> 00:06:42,898
mall openings...
169
00:06:42,900 --> 00:06:46,068
Julie Newmar's bungalow.
170
00:06:48,739 --> 00:06:51,173
I'm sold-- you're ahead of Bale.
171
00:06:52,309 --> 00:06:54,877
There's another reason
I should be higher on the list.
172
00:06:54,879 --> 00:06:56,311
All those other guys
173
00:06:56,313 --> 00:06:59,448
had muscles built
into their costumes.
174
00:06:59,450 --> 00:07:01,717
All I had in my Batsuit
175
00:07:01,719 --> 00:07:05,687
was 100%, grade-A West.
176
00:07:08,459 --> 00:07:10,893
Can we just all agree
we're worried about Affleck?
177
00:07:10,895 --> 00:07:13,028
Sure.
Yeah, of course.
178
00:07:14,365 --> 00:07:16,365
What's an Affleck?
179
00:07:19,303 --> 00:07:22,004
Is there a reason I had
to leave my own apartment?
180
00:07:22,006 --> 00:07:23,672
Well, I think
they just want you to see it
181
00:07:23,674 --> 00:07:25,274
for the first time
all decorated.
182
00:07:25,276 --> 00:07:28,944
But who's gonna tell them
they're doing it wrong?
183
00:07:28,946 --> 00:07:32,180
Well, I'm... I'm sure they'll
ask you to give a speech,
184
00:07:32,182 --> 00:07:34,917
and that's when
you just tear 'em a new one.
185
00:07:34,919 --> 00:07:37,819
Have to say, you...
186
00:07:37,821 --> 00:07:39,755
you do look good in that suit.
187
00:07:39,757 --> 00:07:41,189
Oh. Thank you.
188
00:07:41,191 --> 00:07:43,325
Maybe later I'll, uh...
189
00:07:43,327 --> 00:07:47,062
get to see you
in your birthday suit.
190
00:07:49,333 --> 00:07:52,000
But this is my
birthday suit.
191
00:07:53,437 --> 00:07:56,204
Are you having a stroke?
192
00:07:57,641 --> 00:07:58,840
Because that's the kind of thing
193
00:07:58,842 --> 00:08:00,275
that just ruins
a birthday party.
194
00:08:02,713 --> 00:08:05,247
So, Mother, I'm surprised
you came all this way
195
00:08:05,249 --> 00:08:06,348
for Sheldon's birthday.
196
00:08:06,350 --> 00:08:07,482
Oh, I was happy to.
197
00:08:07,484 --> 00:08:09,418
He did come to my 60th.
198
00:08:09,420 --> 00:08:13,288
Oh. You had a party
for your 60th?
199
00:08:13,290 --> 00:08:15,590
Oh, I wouldn't call it a party.
200
00:08:15,592 --> 00:08:17,559
Just a few close friends.
201
00:08:18,963 --> 00:08:20,929
And your sister and brother.
202
00:08:23,467 --> 00:08:25,701
You know, to be fair,
we did get married in Vegas
203
00:08:25,703 --> 00:08:26,735
and didn't invite her.
204
00:08:26,737 --> 00:08:29,638
And I never did thank you
for that, dear.
205
00:08:32,242 --> 00:08:34,042
(ringtone plays)
AMY: Oh.
206
00:08:34,044 --> 00:08:37,045
Penny says everyone's there.
Are you ready?
207
00:08:37,047 --> 00:08:39,648
(takes deep breath)
I am.
208
00:08:46,991 --> 00:08:49,257
Oh. Wait.
Are you all right?
209
00:08:49,259 --> 00:08:52,094
No, I just...
I got a little light-headed.
210
00:08:52,096 --> 00:08:53,528
Oh, d-do you need a minute?
211
00:08:53,530 --> 00:08:55,664
(exhales)
No.
212
00:08:55,666 --> 00:08:58,000
No, if I can walk
past that pet shop
213
00:08:58,002 --> 00:09:01,436
with the parrot in the window,
I suppose I can do this.
214
00:09:06,377 --> 00:09:08,844
OTHERS:
Happy birthday!
215
00:09:08,846 --> 00:09:10,645
(whooping, clapping)
216
00:09:10,647 --> 00:09:11,980
Speech! Speech!
217
00:09:12,750 --> 00:09:14,850
Come on, Sheldon,
say something.
218
00:09:14,852 --> 00:09:16,084
Uh, um...
219
00:09:16,086 --> 00:09:18,587
uh, thank you all
so much for coming.
220
00:09:18,589 --> 00:09:19,821
Uh, Beverly.
221
00:09:19,823 --> 00:09:21,823
Wil Wheaton.
222
00:09:21,825 --> 00:09:24,326
Adam West,
for some reason.
223
00:09:25,696 --> 00:09:28,463
Batman finally came
to your party.
224
00:09:28,465 --> 00:09:31,199
Happy birthday, Sherman.
225
00:09:34,371 --> 00:09:35,804
SHELDON:
Thank you.
226
00:09:35,806 --> 00:09:37,672
This is all so thoughtful.
227
00:09:37,674 --> 00:09:40,609
(heartbeat thumping loudly)
228
00:09:46,316 --> 00:09:48,150
(panting):
Excuse me.
229
00:09:55,492 --> 00:09:57,359
I still get paid, don't I?
230
00:10:06,859 --> 00:10:09,326
Okay, I'd better go in
there and talk to him.
231
00:10:09,328 --> 00:10:11,295
Well, don't you think
I'm the one who should go in?
232
00:10:11,297 --> 00:10:14,098
No offense, but I've known
the guy a really long time.
233
00:10:14,100 --> 00:10:15,966
Well, I've, you know,
234
00:10:15,968 --> 00:10:18,702
seen him without pants on.
235
00:10:19,505 --> 00:10:22,639
Again, no offense,
but so have I.
236
00:10:22,641 --> 00:10:24,908
Well, he's seen me
without pants on.
237
00:10:24,910 --> 00:10:25,876
Again, no...
238
00:10:25,878 --> 00:10:28,078
Okay, this is ridiculous.
239
00:10:29,482 --> 00:10:31,181
(knocking)
240
00:10:31,183 --> 00:10:32,082
Sheldon?
241
00:10:32,084 --> 00:10:33,083
Can I come in?
242
00:10:33,085 --> 00:10:34,451
(sighs)
243
00:10:34,453 --> 00:10:37,087
How do you know I'm not using
the facilities?
244
00:10:37,089 --> 00:10:39,857
Because you e-mail me your
bathroom schedule once a week,
245
00:10:39,859 --> 00:10:41,425
even though
I've clicked unsubscribe,
246
00:10:41,427 --> 00:10:42,960
like, a thousand times.
247
00:10:49,201 --> 00:10:50,868
So...
248
00:10:50,870 --> 00:10:52,503
what's going on?
249
00:10:52,505 --> 00:10:53,904
I don't know.
250
00:10:53,906 --> 00:10:55,639
I-I looked around the room,
251
00:10:55,641 --> 00:10:57,741
and I saw all the faces
and the presents,
252
00:10:57,743 --> 00:11:00,110
and it... it was just too much.
253
00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:02,646
I get that.
254
00:11:04,884 --> 00:11:07,284
Hey, you want to just bring
a few people in here?
255
00:11:07,286 --> 00:11:09,186
You know,
Wil Wheaton in the bathtub,
256
00:11:09,188 --> 00:11:11,522
Batman on the toilet.
257
00:11:11,524 --> 00:11:13,724
It'll be like
the weirdest Comic-Con ever.
258
00:11:16,562 --> 00:11:18,829
I know that you worked hard
to put this together.
259
00:11:18,831 --> 00:11:20,330
I'm sorry I'm ruining it.
260
00:11:20,332 --> 00:11:21,598
Oh, pl...
You're not ruining it.
261
00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:23,634
Look, at some point,
Raj will try to get everyone
262
00:11:23,636 --> 00:11:24,935
to do the Electric Slide.
263
00:11:24,937 --> 00:11:26,637
Now, that will ruin it.
264
00:11:28,407 --> 00:11:30,808
I don't think
I can go back out there.
265
00:11:31,610 --> 00:11:33,377
That's fine.
266
00:11:44,690 --> 00:11:47,191
You know, I hate that
your sister and her friends
267
00:11:47,193 --> 00:11:49,493
used to torture you.
268
00:11:49,495 --> 00:11:51,228
But what I hate even more
269
00:11:51,230 --> 00:11:54,765
is, if I was there,
I would have tortured you, too.
270
00:11:56,936 --> 00:11:59,903
Based on this pep talk,
I'd say you're still doing it.
271
00:11:59,905 --> 00:12:02,339
(scoffs)
My point is,
272
00:12:02,341 --> 00:12:04,308
there was a time I never
would've been friends
273
00:12:04,310 --> 00:12:06,510
with someone like you,
and now...
274
00:12:06,512 --> 00:12:08,245
you are one
of my favorite people.
275
00:12:08,247 --> 00:12:10,581
So, if what you need is
276
00:12:10,583 --> 00:12:13,250
to spend your birthday
in a bathroom,
277
00:12:13,252 --> 00:12:16,386
I'm happy to do it with you.
278
00:12:18,057 --> 00:12:20,290
Well, everyone will
think I'm weird.
279
00:12:27,166 --> 00:12:29,500
Sweetie, you are weird.
280
00:12:30,803 --> 00:12:32,703
Everyone knows you're weird,
281
00:12:32,705 --> 00:12:33,971
but they're all still here
282
00:12:33,973 --> 00:12:36,540
because they care
about you so much.
283
00:12:36,542 --> 00:12:37,741
(knocking)
284
00:12:37,743 --> 00:12:38,842
KRIPKE:
Hello.
285
00:12:38,844 --> 00:12:40,277
Some of us need
to check our hair
286
00:12:40,279 --> 00:12:43,247
because we might have a shot
with Leonard's mother.
287
00:12:46,552 --> 00:12:48,485
Leonard.
Hey.
288
00:12:48,487 --> 00:12:49,753
It's been a while.
289
00:12:49,755 --> 00:12:50,888
Leslie.
290
00:12:50,890 --> 00:12:52,523
I can't remember
the last time we talked.
291
00:12:52,525 --> 00:12:54,258
So much has changed.
292
00:12:55,895 --> 00:12:58,228
Has it?
293
00:12:59,698 --> 00:13:01,632
Yeah, uh, um,
Penny and I got married.
294
00:13:01,634 --> 00:13:03,066
Wow, congratulations.
295
00:13:03,068 --> 00:13:04,334
You know, actually,
296
00:13:04,336 --> 00:13:06,103
I thought you'd be living
with Sheldon forever.
297
00:13:06,105 --> 00:13:08,038
Yeah, well...
298
00:13:09,808 --> 00:13:11,074
Don't be a stranger.
299
00:13:12,144 --> 00:13:14,111
Okay, everybody,
300
00:13:14,113 --> 00:13:15,345
Sheldon is gonna come back out,
301
00:13:15,347 --> 00:13:16,680
but I think
he's a little embarrassed,
302
00:13:16,682 --> 00:13:19,316
so let's all be
extra nice, okay?
303
00:13:19,318 --> 00:13:20,751
What are you
looking at me for?
304
00:13:20,753 --> 00:13:22,185
I'm a saint. (chuckles)
305
00:13:22,187 --> 00:13:24,187
But a sinner in the sack.
306
00:13:28,193 --> 00:13:29,493
Hello, everyone.
307
00:13:29,495 --> 00:13:30,594
I-I...
308
00:13:30,596 --> 00:13:32,462
I'd like to apologize
for my behavior.
309
00:13:32,464 --> 00:13:35,198
I hope it hasn't put
a damper on the party.
310
00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:37,167
So, just, please,
enjoy yourselves.
311
00:13:37,169 --> 00:13:38,335
That's good.
312
00:13:38,337 --> 00:13:41,805
(party chatter resumes)
313
00:13:41,807 --> 00:13:44,207
Oh, this is quickly
getting out of hand.
314
00:13:44,209 --> 00:13:46,276
If I may,
315
00:13:46,278 --> 00:13:48,579
I-I'd like to propose a toast.
316
00:13:48,581 --> 00:13:50,981
Um, thank you all
for coming tonight.
317
00:13:50,983 --> 00:13:52,049
I know it's customary
318
00:13:52,051 --> 00:13:54,985
for the birthday boy
to receive presents,
319
00:13:54,987 --> 00:13:57,220
but I feel like I got
the greatest gift
320
00:13:57,222 --> 00:13:58,589
the day he was born.
321
00:13:58,591 --> 00:13:59,623
ALL:
Aw.
322
00:13:59,625 --> 00:14:01,625
Hear, hear.
KOOTHRAPPALI: Cheers.
323
00:14:01,627 --> 00:14:03,961
Amy, that was lovely.
324
00:14:03,963 --> 00:14:05,462
You know,
325
00:14:05,464 --> 00:14:06,430
this is fun.
326
00:14:06,432 --> 00:14:07,598
Let's do more.
327
00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:09,900
Someone else say something
wonderful about me.
328
00:14:09,902 --> 00:14:12,202
Sheldon,
I don't think everyone...
329
00:14:12,204 --> 00:14:14,304
Wolowitz, perfect.
Everyone listen to Wolowitz.
330
00:14:15,608 --> 00:14:17,374
Okay, then, uh, (clears throat)
331
00:14:17,376 --> 00:14:19,142
Sheldon, (chuckles)
332
00:14:19,144 --> 00:14:20,777
we've known each other
a long time.
333
00:14:20,779 --> 00:14:24,147
And it is a pleasure
to work with you
334
00:14:24,149 --> 00:14:25,816
and call you my friend.
335
00:14:25,818 --> 00:14:27,551
Little generic. Keep thinking.
We'll circle back.
336
00:14:27,553 --> 00:14:29,052
Wil Wheaton, go.
337
00:14:30,556 --> 00:14:33,890
Sheldon, I know that we've had
our ups and downs,
338
00:14:33,892 --> 00:14:35,959
but I can honestly say
339
00:14:35,961 --> 00:14:37,461
that my life is
so much more interesting
340
00:14:37,463 --> 00:14:38,662
because you are in it.
341
00:14:38,664 --> 00:14:42,165
We may have met because
you are a fan of Star Trek.
342
00:14:42,167 --> 00:14:44,635
But I have become
a fan of Sheldon Cooper.
343
00:14:44,637 --> 00:14:46,403
Live long and prosper,
buddy.
344
00:14:46,405 --> 00:14:47,471
And happy birthday.
345
00:14:47,473 --> 00:14:48,739
ALL:
Cheers.
346
00:14:48,741 --> 00:14:51,008
That's how you do it, Wolowitz.
347
00:14:51,010 --> 00:14:53,043
Now you see
348
00:14:53,045 --> 00:14:54,511
why he's famous and you're not.
349
00:14:56,915 --> 00:14:58,448
Sheldon,
350
00:14:58,450 --> 00:15:00,917
I know the future holds
great things for you,
351
00:15:00,919 --> 00:15:03,620
and we all can't wait to see
what they are.
352
00:15:03,622 --> 00:15:05,856
Happy birthday, dear.
353
00:15:05,858 --> 00:15:07,758
ALL:
Cheers.
354
00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:09,292
Someone call Animal Control.
355
00:15:09,294 --> 00:15:11,862
There's a cougar on the loose.
356
00:15:13,165 --> 00:15:14,598
Barry, stop.
357
00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:16,233
Seriously, Barry, stop.
358
00:15:18,137 --> 00:15:21,271
And it was Gandhi who said,
359
00:15:21,273 --> 00:15:23,640
“Live as if you were to
360
00:15:23,642 --> 00:15:25,809
“die tomorrow.
361
00:15:25,811 --> 00:15:28,211
“Learn as if you were to live
362
00:15:28,213 --> 00:15:29,613
forever.”
363
00:15:29,615 --> 00:15:31,248
And it was Sheldon Cooper who
said “Let's speed this up.
364
00:15:31,250 --> 00:15:33,717
A lot of people want to talk”"
365
00:15:33,719 --> 00:15:36,620
Uh, in the past, I would've said
something obnoxious,
366
00:15:36,622 --> 00:15:38,889
like, “Happy birthday, dumbass”.
367
00:15:38,891 --> 00:15:40,991
But I'm not gonna do it.
368
00:15:40,993 --> 00:15:42,659
You and I have both grown a lot,
369
00:15:42,661 --> 00:15:45,262
and it's just so nice
to see you all again.
370
00:15:45,264 --> 00:15:46,663
So...
371
00:15:46,665 --> 00:15:48,065
happy birthday, Sheldon.
372
00:15:48,067 --> 00:15:49,366
Oh.
373
00:15:49,368 --> 00:15:51,435
Oh, now, you know I hate change.
Say it.
374
00:15:51,437 --> 00:15:53,036
Happy birthday, dumbass!
375
00:15:53,038 --> 00:15:54,871
(cheering)
376
00:15:54,873 --> 00:15:56,540
Happy birthday, young man.
377
00:15:56,542 --> 00:16:00,043
And if any of you have enjoyed
seeing me here today,
378
00:16:00,045 --> 00:16:02,646
I'm also available
for Comic-Cons,
379
00:16:02,648 --> 00:16:05,782
bachelor parties,
bar mitzvahs...
380
00:16:05,784 --> 00:16:09,319
I can't think of anything to say
that hasn't already been said.
381
00:16:09,321 --> 00:16:11,555
So, here's to you, Sheldon.
382
00:16:11,557 --> 00:16:12,889
Hear, hear.
Hear, hear.
383
00:16:12,891 --> 00:16:14,157
Thank you, Bernadette.
384
00:16:14,159 --> 00:16:15,425
That was perfect.
385
00:16:15,427 --> 00:16:18,929
What? You gotta be kidding me?
386
00:16:18,931 --> 00:16:21,364
Sheldon, we've been
together so long,
387
00:16:21,366 --> 00:16:24,000
it's hard to remember a time
you weren't in my life.
388
00:16:24,002 --> 00:16:25,502
And believe me, I try.
389
00:16:25,504 --> 00:16:27,270
(laughter)
390
00:16:27,272 --> 00:16:28,638
You make me laugh.
391
00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:30,841
You make me a better scientist.
392
00:16:30,843 --> 00:16:32,342
You make me crazy.
393
00:16:32,344 --> 00:16:33,944
You're more than just
my roommate,
394
00:16:33,946 --> 00:16:35,679
you're my brother.
395
00:16:36,448 --> 00:16:37,581
Thank you.
396
00:16:37,583 --> 00:16:38,982
Happy birthday, buddy.
397
00:16:38,984 --> 00:16:40,817
ALL:
Cheers.
398
00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:43,587
Thank you.
That-that was wonderful.
399
00:16:43,589 --> 00:16:44,654
PENNY:
Oh, wait, wait, wait.
400
00:16:44,656 --> 00:16:46,523
Stuart didn't get to speak.
401
00:16:46,525 --> 00:16:48,892
Oh, oh, okay. Um...
402
00:16:48,894 --> 00:16:50,794
Uh, Sheldon,
403
00:16:50,796 --> 00:16:52,829
I've spent most of my life
feeling invisible,
404
00:16:52,831 --> 00:16:54,898
but having you and everyone...
405
00:16:54,900 --> 00:16:56,867
Hey, everybody, listen up.
406
00:16:58,070 --> 00:17:00,837
You nailed it.
407
00:17:00,839 --> 00:17:02,773
We've got someone
who couldn't be here
408
00:17:02,775 --> 00:17:04,007
but really wanted to wish you
409
00:17:04,009 --> 00:17:05,709
a happy birthday.
410
00:17:06,845 --> 00:17:07,911
Hello, Sheldon.
411
00:17:07,913 --> 00:17:09,346
(gasps)
412
00:17:09,348 --> 00:17:11,281
Professor Hawking.
(chuckles)
413
00:17:11,283 --> 00:17:13,350
Happy birthday to you.
414
00:17:13,352 --> 00:17:14,551
Thank you so much.
415
00:17:14,553 --> 00:17:15,519
I can't believe you're...
416
00:17:15,521 --> 00:17:16,686
Happy birthday to you.
417
00:17:16,688 --> 00:17:18,855
Oh, you're singing.
Well, I'm sorry.
418
00:17:20,492 --> 00:17:22,359
Happy birthday, dear Sheldon.
419
00:17:22,361 --> 00:17:23,493
LEONARD:
Uh, Professor Hawking,
420
00:17:23,495 --> 00:17:25,295
if you just give us
one second,
421
00:17:25,297 --> 00:17:27,631
we'll light the candles,
and we can all sing together.
422
00:17:27,633 --> 00:17:30,901
I was crushing it,
but all right.
423
00:17:32,037 --> 00:17:33,570
Okay, while they get
the cake,
424
00:17:33,572 --> 00:17:35,138
Sheldon,
I just want to say,
425
00:17:35,140 --> 00:17:36,907
I hope you didn't think you were
gonna get through tonight
426
00:17:36,909 --> 00:17:38,008
without a hug.
427
00:17:38,010 --> 00:17:39,276
(sighs)
428
00:17:39,278 --> 00:17:40,877
You know, I used to hate
these hugs.
429
00:17:44,216 --> 00:17:46,383
Now they're just
extremely irritating.
430
00:17:55,663 --> 00:17:57,596
Ready when you are,
Professor Hawking.
431
00:17:57,598 --> 00:18:00,098
And a one, and a two...
432
00:18:00,100 --> 00:18:04,770
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
433
00:18:04,772 --> 00:18:09,975
♪ Happy birthday to you ♪
434
00:18:09,977 --> 00:18:15,981
♪ Happy birthday, dear Sheldon ♪
435
00:18:15,983 --> 00:18:21,253
♪ Happy birthday to you. ♪
436
00:18:21,255 --> 00:18:25,257
...to you.
437
00:18:27,061 --> 00:18:28,861
(cheering)
438
00:18:31,120 --> 00:18:33,966
So, who's taking me home?
439
00:18:36,217 --> 00:18:42,717
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man