1
00:00:02,769 --> 00:00:04,970
I just read about
an experiment designed
2
00:00:04,972 --> 00:00:06,271
to see if you could
make two people fall
3
00:00:06,273 --> 00:00:08,173
in love in a matter of hours.
4
00:00:08,175 --> 00:00:09,842
That doesn't sound right.
5
00:00:09,844 --> 00:00:12,044
My research has shown that
it takes three to five years
6
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of shameless begging.
7
00:00:14,715 --> 00:00:17,683
Honey, neither of us comes off
good in that story.
8
00:00:17,685 --> 00:00:18,984
KOOTHRAPPALI:
Yeah, I-I...
9
00:00:18,986 --> 00:00:21,220
I saw that article
you're talking about.
10
00:00:21,222 --> 00:00:23,255
Uh, the participants
ask each other a series
11
00:00:23,257 --> 00:00:25,958
of questions designed
to promote intimacy.
12
00:00:25,960 --> 00:00:27,292
And then they finish it off
by staring
13
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into each other's eyes
for four minutes.
14
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Oh, that's nonsense.
15
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I proclaimed my
love for you.
16
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And the last time I
looked into your eyes
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00:00:34,268 --> 00:00:37,236
was when you thought
you had conjunctivitis.
18
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Other than the fact
that I had it,
19
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that was a magical night.
20
00:00:42,476 --> 00:00:45,244
Raj, would you ever try an
experiment like that with Emily?
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What? I don't need
science to win her heart.
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I have my family's
wealth for that.
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00:00:50,351 --> 00:00:52,785
I'm telling you, you can't
create love in a few hours.
24
00:00:52,787 --> 00:00:54,553
Right?
Oh, careful.
25
00:00:54,555 --> 00:00:57,256
You're poking at the whole
foundation of The Bachelor.
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00:00:57,258 --> 00:00:58,590
SHELDON:
Yeah, but
27
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we don't have to debate this.
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We're scientists.
29
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We can conduct our own research.
30
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Yeah, I propose that we imprison
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two street people.
No.
32
00:01:07,234 --> 00:01:09,735
And...
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You didn't even let me finish.
34
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Forget it!
Oh!
35
00:01:13,107 --> 00:01:15,407
So, you can experiment
on all the apes you want.
36
00:01:15,409 --> 00:01:17,976
But I want to manipulate
the emotions of two captive
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00:01:17,978 --> 00:01:20,913
human beings, suddenly
I'm the monster.
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00:01:20,915 --> 00:01:22,581
KOOTHRAPPALI:
Why don't you
39
00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:24,616
just do the test?
40
00:01:24,618 --> 00:01:27,753
In the interest of science,
I'd be willing to.
41
00:01:27,755 --> 00:01:29,388
What? You're okay with
an experiment where you have
42
00:01:29,390 --> 00:01:32,691
to answer awkward questions
about your innermost feelings?
43
00:01:32,693 --> 00:01:34,026
Yes.
44
00:01:34,028 --> 00:01:35,961
Please, can I do it
with him? Please?!
45
00:01:37,465 --> 00:01:39,731
I've been listening
to Sheldon's feelings on things
46
00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:42,301
for ten years.
Tag, you're it.
47
00:01:42,303 --> 00:01:45,003
Yeah, but what
if the experiment works?
48
00:01:45,005 --> 00:01:46,705
I'm not gonna fall
in love with Sheldon.
49
00:01:46,707 --> 00:01:47,806
AMY:
That's what I said.
50
00:01:47,808 --> 00:01:49,341
Before I knew it,
he pontificated his way
51
00:01:49,343 --> 00:01:51,477
right into my heart.
52
00:01:51,479 --> 00:01:54,146
Uh, fun fact--
"pontificate"
53
00:01:54,148 --> 00:01:56,315
comes from the Latin
word "pontifex,"
54
00:01:56,317 --> 00:01:58,383
which means "bridge
builder" or "Pope."
55
00:02:00,154 --> 00:02:03,055
In love yet?
56
00:02:04,425 --> 00:02:08,026
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
57
00:02:08,028 --> 00:02:11,330
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
58
00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:12,998
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
59
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,701
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
60
00:02:15,703 --> 00:02:18,203
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
61
00:02:18,205 --> 00:02:20,906
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
62
00:02:20,908 --> 00:02:22,808
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
63
00:02:22,810 --> 00:02:24,510
♪ Bang! ♪
64
00:02:30,417 --> 00:02:33,085
Just out of curiosity, Penny,
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00:02:33,087 --> 00:02:36,321
if this experiment does
make us fall in love,
66
00:02:36,323 --> 00:02:39,558
would you drive me
to Lake Geneva, Wisconsin
67
00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:42,394
for Gary Con?
68
00:02:42,396 --> 00:02:44,196
It's the only convention
celebrating
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00:02:44,198 --> 00:02:46,665
the life and work of Gary Gygax,
70
00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:49,768
the co-creator
of Dungeons and Dragons.
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00:02:49,770 --> 00:02:51,503
You know what?
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00:02:51,505 --> 00:02:53,272
I can honestly say
if we fall in love,
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00:02:53,274 --> 00:02:55,274
not only will I drive you there,
I will buy you
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00:02:55,276 --> 00:02:57,342
all the dragon T-shirts
you want.
75
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,513
Okay, babe, let's do this.
76
00:03:04,552 --> 00:03:06,818
You guys are
really being calm
77
00:03:06,820 --> 00:03:09,021
about Penny and Sheldon
doing this thing.
78
00:03:09,023 --> 00:03:10,055
(stammers)
If it were me,
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00:03:10,057 --> 00:03:11,523
I-I'd be a little nervous.
80
00:03:11,525 --> 00:03:12,558
Why?
Well,
81
00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:13,825
even if the study's nonsense,
82
00:03:13,827 --> 00:03:16,428
I-I don't believe
in tempting fate.
83
00:03:16,430 --> 00:03:18,530
Same reason I wouldn't
use a Ouija board,
84
00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:21,099
or pick a fight
with an Asian guy.
85
00:03:21,101 --> 00:03:24,169
He probably doesn't know karate,
but... why risk it?
86
00:03:24,171 --> 00:03:26,505
I think we're safe.
87
00:03:26,507 --> 00:03:27,773
Well, that's what the bullies
88
00:03:27,775 --> 00:03:29,074
at Bruce Lee's
high school thought.
89
00:03:29,076 --> 00:03:30,175
And then, bam!
90
00:03:30,177 --> 00:03:32,244
Karate.
91
00:03:32,246 --> 00:03:33,912
LEONARD: Well,
are we just gonna
92
00:03:33,914 --> 00:03:35,914
sit here while they do
the experiment?
93
00:03:35,916 --> 00:03:37,449
The two of us could do it.
94
00:03:37,451 --> 00:03:39,017
Yeah, sure, that might be fun.
95
00:03:39,019 --> 00:03:40,052
What's the first question?
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00:03:40,054 --> 00:03:41,453
Hang on.
97
00:03:41,455 --> 00:03:42,721
Okay.
98
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:46,491
"Given the choice
of anyone in the world,
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00:03:46,493 --> 00:03:49,761
whom would you want
as a dinner guest?"
100
00:03:49,763 --> 00:03:51,129
Hmm.
101
00:03:51,131 --> 00:03:53,799
I can honestly say Penny.
102
00:03:53,801 --> 00:03:56,535
Oh... then I choose a janitor.
103
00:03:56,537 --> 00:03:59,071
'Cause I'm about to throw up.
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00:04:00,608 --> 00:04:01,740
I'm in love.
105
00:04:01,742 --> 00:04:04,509
Let's do something else.
106
00:04:04,511 --> 00:04:06,612
Ooh, uh, Emily
gets off work soon.
107
00:04:06,614 --> 00:04:08,447
Why don't the four of us go out?
108
00:04:08,449 --> 00:04:09,481
Okay.
Sounds good.
109
00:04:09,483 --> 00:04:10,782
Should we call
Howard and Bernadette?
110
00:04:10,784 --> 00:04:12,384
I don't know what time
their plane gets in,
111
00:04:12,386 --> 00:04:14,253
but let me, let me
shoot them a text.
112
00:04:14,255 --> 00:04:16,521
Did he say anything
about the funeral?
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00:04:16,523 --> 00:04:19,958
Not much, but he seemed to
be in a pretty good place.
114
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:21,226
Are you kidding me?!
115
00:04:21,228 --> 00:04:24,196
You lost my mother's ashes?!
116
00:04:24,198 --> 00:04:26,465
No, I-I'm just saying
that sometimes
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00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:28,000
bags are misrouted.
118
00:04:28,002 --> 00:04:29,935
All right, fine.
Where did you misroute
119
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:31,737
the only woman
who ever loved me?
120
00:04:31,739 --> 00:04:34,873
The first... well,
first, I meant first.
121
00:04:34,875 --> 00:04:37,342
I just need some information.
122
00:04:37,344 --> 00:04:39,344
Uh, what's the flight number?
123
00:04:39,346 --> 00:04:40,579
816.
124
00:04:40,581 --> 00:04:42,247
I really did mean first.
125
00:04:42,249 --> 00:04:44,650
Just drop it.
126
00:04:44,652 --> 00:04:46,184
And can you describe the bag?
127
00:04:46,186 --> 00:04:47,419
Um, well,
128
00:04:47,421 --> 00:04:48,587
it's, uh, black.
129
00:04:48,589 --> 00:04:49,855
There's a red ribbon
tied to the handle...
130
00:04:49,857 --> 00:04:52,224
The world's greatest mom
is in the shoe compartment!
131
00:04:54,361 --> 00:04:55,460
You ready to begin?
132
00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:56,995
Yup. Be right there.
133
00:04:56,997 --> 00:04:58,764
I assume you don't want wine.
134
00:04:58,766 --> 00:05:00,732
Correct. You're not
supposed to drink alcohol
135
00:05:00,734 --> 00:05:03,235
when operating heavy machinery.
136
00:05:03,237 --> 00:05:05,037
What heavy machinery?
137
00:05:09,043 --> 00:05:10,509
Let's just start.
138
00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:12,778
Well, as a Texas gentleman,
139
00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:14,780
I'm inclined to
say ladies first.
140
00:05:14,782 --> 00:05:17,716
Although, I'm concerned that
level of politeness and charm
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00:05:17,718 --> 00:05:21,119
might make you fall in love with
me before the test even begins.
142
00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:23,121
Perhaps we should flip a coin.
143
00:05:23,123 --> 00:05:24,890
Or if you're familiar
with the rules
144
00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:26,258
of Rock, Paper, Scissors...
145
00:05:26,260 --> 00:05:27,526
Question one.
146
00:05:27,528 --> 00:05:29,528
"Given the choice
147
00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:31,063
"of anyone in the world,
whom would you want
148
00:05:31,065 --> 00:05:32,764
as a dinner guest?"
149
00:05:32,766 --> 00:05:34,099
Hmm.
150
00:05:34,101 --> 00:05:35,300
Living or dead?
151
00:05:35,302 --> 00:05:37,235
Just says "anyone in the world."
152
00:05:37,237 --> 00:05:38,437
I guess that means living.
153
00:05:38,439 --> 00:05:39,638
Ah, that's just as well.
154
00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:41,707
As much as I'd love
to meet Euclid--
155
00:05:41,709 --> 00:05:43,375
inventor of the
geometric proof--
156
00:05:43,377 --> 00:05:44,976
he probably wore
sandals and I cannot
157
00:05:44,978 --> 00:05:47,245
look at toes during dinner.
158
00:05:48,982 --> 00:05:50,649
Oh, I know!
159
00:05:50,651 --> 00:05:52,384
The person I'd most
like to have dinner with
160
00:05:52,386 --> 00:05:55,687
is myself.
161
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:57,089
You sure that's your choice?
162
00:05:57,091 --> 00:05:59,358
'Cause I've had that dinner.
163
00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:00,926
Well, I haven't.
164
00:06:00,928 --> 00:06:02,728
And while they say
never meet your heroes,
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00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:04,696
I just don't see how
I could disappoint.
166
00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:06,965
Who would you choose?
167
00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:09,101
Robert Downey, Jr.
You...
168
00:06:09,103 --> 00:06:10,268
Oh!
169
00:06:10,270 --> 00:06:13,171
I didn't think of Iron Man.
170
00:06:14,441 --> 00:06:16,408
You know, maybe after
myself and I have dinner,
171
00:06:16,410 --> 00:06:18,677
we can meet you two for dessert.
172
00:06:21,281 --> 00:06:23,448
So, what do you
guys want to do?
173
00:06:23,450 --> 00:06:25,484
Well, we're the ones
tagging along, you pick.
174
00:06:25,486 --> 00:06:26,585
Ooh!
175
00:06:26,587 --> 00:06:28,587
Have you ever been
to an escape room?
176
00:06:28,589 --> 00:06:30,155
Mm-mm, what's that?
Um...
177
00:06:30,157 --> 00:06:31,690
it's kind of like
interactive theater,
178
00:06:31,692 --> 00:06:33,091
except you have
to solve puzzles
179
00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:34,826
in a certain amount
of time to get out.
180
00:06:34,828 --> 00:06:36,128
There's one downtown
where they
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00:06:36,130 --> 00:06:37,729
trap you in a room
with a zombie.
182
00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:39,664
(short laugh)
Oh!
183
00:06:39,666 --> 00:06:41,867
So, kind of like what's
happening with Penny right now.
184
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:47,105
"What would constitute
185
00:06:47,107 --> 00:06:49,608
a perfect day for you?"
186
00:06:49,610 --> 00:06:51,343
Uh, well...
187
00:06:51,345 --> 00:06:54,813
I'd probably sleep in,
do a little yoga,
188
00:06:54,815 --> 00:06:56,848
then lie on the beach while
189
00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:59,651
cute cabana boys
brought me drinks and...
190
00:06:59,653 --> 00:07:01,720
probably get a massage
and then cap off the night
191
00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:03,722
with some dancing.
192
00:07:03,724 --> 00:07:05,991
That's it?
Yeah, why?
193
00:07:05,993 --> 00:07:07,759
You didn't mention Leonard.
194
00:07:09,863 --> 00:07:12,330
He's there.
195
00:07:12,332 --> 00:07:14,833
I don't think so.
196
00:07:14,835 --> 00:07:16,067
(stammers)
Leonard can't stand
197
00:07:16,069 --> 00:07:19,571
yoga, the beach,
massages or dancing.
198
00:07:19,573 --> 00:07:20,639
Yeah, well,
he brought a book, okay?
199
00:07:20,641 --> 00:07:22,874
What's yours?
Yeah...
200
00:07:22,876 --> 00:07:25,911
Uh, I wake up.
201
00:07:25,913 --> 00:07:29,047
Uh, I enjoy some French
toast with butter and syrup.
202
00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:32,083
Uh, then a wormhole opens,
203
00:07:32,085 --> 00:07:35,687
and whisks me millions of years
204
00:07:35,689 --> 00:07:38,290
into the future where
my towering intellect
205
00:07:38,292 --> 00:07:41,693
is used to save the last
remnants of mankind
206
00:07:41,695 --> 00:07:44,129
from a predatory alien race.
207
00:07:46,033 --> 00:07:48,567
Interesting,
you didn't mention Amy.
208
00:07:49,870 --> 00:07:53,238
Who do you think made the French
toast with butter and syrup?
209
00:07:54,541 --> 00:07:55,974
You're about to enter the lab
210
00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:58,376
of the late Dr. David Saltzberg.
211
00:07:58,378 --> 00:08:00,312
While conducting studies
on slowing
212
00:08:00,314 --> 00:08:03,148
the aging process, there was
a catastrophic accident
213
00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:04,850
and he died.
214
00:08:06,053 --> 00:08:08,386
Or did he?
215
00:08:08,388 --> 00:08:10,722
Ladies?
216
00:08:10,724 --> 00:08:12,324
Are you being polite or scared?
217
00:08:13,527 --> 00:08:15,494
Yup.
218
00:08:17,798 --> 00:08:20,198
Ah, what a room!
219
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,267
Oh-oh!
Oh!
220
00:08:24,438 --> 00:08:25,971
This is cool.
221
00:08:25,973 --> 00:08:27,405
So, how do we start?
222
00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:29,708
We have to look for the clues
hidden around the room.
223
00:08:29,710 --> 00:08:31,309
Uh, wasn't there
supposed to be a zombie?
224
00:08:31,311 --> 00:08:33,345
(growling)
(yelling)
225
00:08:33,347 --> 00:08:34,613
Ooh!
226
00:08:35,883 --> 00:08:37,749
Okay, let's hope
one of the clues
227
00:08:37,751 --> 00:08:39,951
is written on a pair
of clean underwear.
228
00:08:42,389 --> 00:08:44,222
Mr. and Mrs. Wolowitz?
229
00:08:44,223 --> 00:08:46,056
As far as I can tell,
your bag arrived in Los Angeles.
230
00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:47,659
So, where is it?
231
00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:49,427
I don't know, perhaps somebody
232
00:08:49,429 --> 00:08:51,329
took it off the carousel
by mistake?
233
00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:54,533
So, some stranger has my mom?
234
00:08:54,535 --> 00:08:56,434
Is that what you're telling me?
235
00:08:56,436 --> 00:09:00,171
My poor mother can be anywhere
in Los Angeles right now?
236
00:09:00,173 --> 00:09:02,774
I-I wish I was telling you that.
237
00:09:02,776 --> 00:09:04,242
Um...
238
00:09:04,244 --> 00:09:05,410
but the passenger
could've gotten
239
00:09:05,412 --> 00:09:07,279
on an international flight.
240
00:09:07,281 --> 00:09:09,447
Oh, okay, great!
241
00:09:09,449 --> 00:09:11,983
So, your entire job is
to find lost luggage,
242
00:09:11,985 --> 00:09:13,552
and you've narrowed
down the location
243
00:09:13,554 --> 00:09:16,688
of my mother to
the planet Earth!
244
00:09:16,690 --> 00:09:18,156
I'm sorry!
245
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:20,592
W-Would 500
frequent-flyer miles help?
246
00:09:20,594 --> 00:09:22,794
That could get you
to Sacramento.
247
00:09:25,766 --> 00:09:27,966
"If you could
wake up tomorrow
248
00:09:27,968 --> 00:09:31,236
"having gained any
one quality or ability,
249
00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:32,704
what would it be?"
250
00:09:32,706 --> 00:09:35,206
Well, not to steal
from the Bible,
251
00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:38,843
but turning water into wine
sounds pretty good.
252
00:09:41,715 --> 00:09:44,950
I don't think you're
taking this seriously.
253
00:09:44,952 --> 00:09:46,685
Come on, I'm just having
some fun with you.
254
00:09:46,687 --> 00:09:47,719
I believe
255
00:09:47,721 --> 00:09:49,921
what you're doing is using humor
256
00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:51,990
to avoid vulnerability.
257
00:09:51,992 --> 00:09:54,025
Fine.
258
00:09:55,662 --> 00:09:56,728
Honestly...
259
00:09:56,730 --> 00:09:59,631
if I could have one quality...
260
00:09:59,633 --> 00:10:03,401
I wish I could be
as smart as you guys.
261
00:10:03,403 --> 00:10:06,705
Ha! Keep dreaming.
262
00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:08,306
Sheldon!
263
00:10:08,308 --> 00:10:09,474
I'm sorry.
264
00:10:09,476 --> 00:10:11,209
That was me having
fun with you.
265
00:10:11,211 --> 00:10:12,744
Look.
266
00:10:12,746 --> 00:10:14,913
You may not be as...
267
00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:18,216
academically inclined as are we.
268
00:10:18,218 --> 00:10:20,418
Yes, that's how you say it.
269
00:10:20,420 --> 00:10:22,387
But...
270
00:10:22,389 --> 00:10:26,157
You possess an
intelligence I envy.
271
00:10:26,159 --> 00:10:28,627
Which leads me to my answer.
272
00:10:28,629 --> 00:10:30,328
I would choose the ability
273
00:10:30,330 --> 00:10:32,864
to read people's minds.
274
00:10:32,866 --> 00:10:36,067
Well, I can't read
people's minds.
275
00:10:36,069 --> 00:10:37,569
Actually, that's not true.
276
00:10:37,571 --> 00:10:38,870
I can read men's minds.
277
00:10:38,872 --> 00:10:41,306
But only 'cause it's
usually the one thing.
278
00:10:42,309 --> 00:10:45,777
When are we going
to get robot eyes?
279
00:10:45,779 --> 00:10:49,547
You're all alike.
280
00:10:49,549 --> 00:10:51,883
Well, what I meant was...
281
00:10:51,885 --> 00:10:54,285
I often misinterpret
282
00:10:54,287 --> 00:10:56,021
how others are feeling.
283
00:10:56,023 --> 00:10:58,990
Like, I can't always tell
if someone is only joking
284
00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:00,925
or laughing at me.
285
00:11:00,927 --> 00:11:03,428
You know, like, uh, if they're
mad at something I've done
286
00:11:03,430 --> 00:11:05,363
or just in a bad mood.
287
00:11:05,365 --> 00:11:07,298
It-it's incredibly stressful.
288
00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:10,135
Really? You always
seem so confident.
289
00:11:10,137 --> 00:11:11,436
Well, I'm not.
290
00:11:11,438 --> 00:11:13,238
And if I could read
people's minds,
291
00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:16,441
life would be so much simpler.
292
00:11:16,443 --> 00:11:19,411
Well, now I wish I had
293
00:11:19,413 --> 00:11:22,080
the ability to make
that stuff easier for you.
294
00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:25,383
Thank you.
295
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:28,053
(quiet laugh)
296
00:11:28,055 --> 00:11:31,022
Wow, I just felt this wave
297
00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:34,659
of affection for you.
298
00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:38,163
You sure it's not
too much Bible juice?
299
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,834
And the wave is gone.
300
00:11:48,141 --> 00:11:49,407
Brains!
301
00:11:49,409 --> 00:11:52,911
Keep it down!
We're working here.
302
00:11:52,913 --> 00:11:54,412
Okay, we've got
the cipher decoded!
303
00:11:54,414 --> 00:11:55,714
How's it going
with the globe?
304
00:11:55,716 --> 00:11:57,582
We used the coordinates
to locate the cities.
305
00:11:57,584 --> 00:11:59,117
I'm putting the city names
in the grid now.
306
00:11:59,119 --> 00:12:00,952
I'm sure that'll give us
the code to the safe.
307
00:12:00,954 --> 00:12:02,620
Solve puzzle too fast!
308
00:12:02,622 --> 00:12:04,089
Slow down!
309
00:12:04,991 --> 00:12:05,824
Yup! Got the code.
310
00:12:05,826 --> 00:12:07,425
Just saying...
311
00:12:07,427 --> 00:12:10,495
no refund for finish early!
312
00:12:14,401 --> 00:12:16,468
Sure you don't want to go home?
313
00:12:16,470 --> 00:12:19,070
When the bag's returned,
they'll deliver it to us.
314
00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:22,073
No, I'm not leaving without her.
315
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:24,142
All right, we'll wait.
316
00:12:27,814 --> 00:12:29,814
I could've driven her.
317
00:12:29,816 --> 00:12:31,483
What?
318
00:12:31,485 --> 00:12:34,786
The day she left for Florida.
319
00:12:34,788 --> 00:12:37,589
She asked me to drive her
to the airport.
320
00:12:39,860 --> 00:12:41,960
I-I was too busy.
321
00:12:41,962 --> 00:12:43,661
And...
322
00:12:43,663 --> 00:12:47,232
I made her take a cab.
323
00:12:48,969 --> 00:12:51,703
I was too busy.
324
00:12:51,705 --> 00:12:54,405
There's no way
you could've known.
325
00:12:56,777 --> 00:12:58,276
Be right back.
326
00:13:01,248 --> 00:13:03,148
Excuse me?
327
00:13:03,150 --> 00:13:04,449
Yes?
328
00:13:06,019 --> 00:13:07,852
You better find
my husband's mother
329
00:13:07,854 --> 00:13:09,320
'cause one way or another,
330
00:13:09,322 --> 00:13:12,624
we're walking out of this
airport with a dead woman!
331
00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:17,529
(moaning)
332
00:13:17,531 --> 00:13:19,464
Which book are we looking for?
Uh...
333
00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:21,199
Origin of Species.
334
00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:23,368
Here it is.
335
00:13:23,370 --> 00:13:24,435
There's a black light.
336
00:13:24,437 --> 00:13:26,604
Oh, hang on.
(zombie moaning)
337
00:13:27,874 --> 00:13:29,641
Oh, okay.
338
00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:31,209
Uh, "Brothers and sisters
339
00:13:31,211 --> 00:13:32,877
"I have none,
but this man's father
340
00:13:32,879 --> 00:13:36,080
is my father's son.
Who am I looking at?"
341
00:13:37,417 --> 00:13:38,750
(yells)
342
00:13:38,752 --> 00:13:40,985
Yeah, yeah, we get it--
you want brains. Calm down.
343
00:13:40,987 --> 00:13:42,987
Well, if I don't have a brother,
344
00:13:42,989 --> 00:13:45,557
my father's son is me.
345
00:13:45,559 --> 00:13:48,126
And if I'm this man's father,
then he's my son.
346
00:13:48,128 --> 00:13:49,460
The answer's "son."
347
00:13:49,462 --> 00:13:50,628
Ooh! There's a picture
of the sun over there.
348
00:13:50,630 --> 00:13:52,263
I bet the key's behind it.
349
00:13:52,265 --> 00:13:55,066
Could be somewhere else!
350
00:13:55,068 --> 00:13:56,467
Oh, got the key!
351
00:13:56,469 --> 00:13:58,169
So, that's the key to the door?
352
00:13:58,171 --> 00:13:59,470
That's it?
353
00:13:59,472 --> 00:14:02,473
We spent $200
on six minutes of fun?
354
00:14:02,475 --> 00:14:04,843
It's like when you bought that
remote-controlled helicopter,
355
00:14:04,845 --> 00:14:07,512
and it just... flew away.
356
00:14:09,249 --> 00:14:12,350
Sorry, guys. Really thought
the puzzles would be better.
357
00:14:12,352 --> 00:14:15,687
Well, to be fair, we do all
have advanced degrees.
358
00:14:15,689 --> 00:14:19,390
Remember that
before you post on Yelp!
359
00:14:21,728 --> 00:14:24,529
"If you were to die this evening
with no opportunity
360
00:14:24,531 --> 00:14:26,097
"to communicate with anyone,
361
00:14:26,099 --> 00:14:29,033
what would you most regret
not having told someone?"
362
00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:31,803
So, it would be today?
363
00:14:31,805 --> 00:14:33,805
Huh.
364
00:14:33,807 --> 00:14:35,807
Well, I suppose there's
something satisfying
365
00:14:35,809 --> 00:14:38,543
about dying on my birthday.
366
00:14:38,545 --> 00:14:40,912
Today's your birthday?
367
00:14:40,914 --> 00:14:42,013
Yes.
368
00:14:42,015 --> 00:14:44,082
Well, that's
always been a secret!
369
00:14:44,084 --> 00:14:46,050
Not even Amy knows!
370
00:14:46,052 --> 00:14:49,954
Well, I don't enjoy presents.
371
00:14:49,956 --> 00:14:51,456
And the thought of people
372
00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:53,858
jumping out and yelling
"Surprise!" fills me
373
00:14:53,860 --> 00:14:55,927
with more dread than the words
374
00:14:55,929 --> 00:14:58,997
"George Lucas Director's Cut."
375
00:14:58,999 --> 00:15:01,366
So, why did you finally tell me?
376
00:15:01,368 --> 00:15:04,202
The point of the experiment is
377
00:15:04,204 --> 00:15:06,504
to be completely honest
with each other.
378
00:15:06,506 --> 00:15:09,407
Well, thank you
for sharing it with me.
379
00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:11,309
I won't tell anyone.
380
00:15:11,311 --> 00:15:13,144
Thank you.
381
00:15:13,146 --> 00:15:14,345
That is so funny.
382
00:15:14,347 --> 00:15:16,648
I never would have
pegged you for a Pisces.
383
00:15:16,650 --> 00:15:19,584
You're making it difficult
to love you right now.
384
00:15:22,355 --> 00:15:24,455
Great news!
Your bag was returned.
385
00:15:24,457 --> 00:15:26,124
Oh, thank God!
386
00:15:26,126 --> 00:15:27,859
It's okay, she's here!
387
00:15:27,861 --> 00:15:28,993
Ma's here.
388
00:15:28,995 --> 00:15:30,561
Okay, thank you so much.
389
00:15:30,563 --> 00:15:32,096
Ma?
390
00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:34,032
I'm sorry I didn't
391
00:15:34,034 --> 00:15:36,601
take you to the airport.
I just want you to know
392
00:15:36,603 --> 00:15:39,504
that I'll never forgive myself
for being so selfish.
393
00:15:39,506 --> 00:15:41,005
And I promise
394
00:15:41,007 --> 00:15:42,807
to keep you close
395
00:15:42,809 --> 00:15:45,944
for the rest of my life.
396
00:15:45,946 --> 00:15:49,580
Oh, no. That thing's gonna
end up in my bedroom.
397
00:15:52,552 --> 00:15:54,352
That's it! We're done
with the questions.
398
00:15:54,354 --> 00:15:55,987
All that's left to do is
399
00:15:55,989 --> 00:15:57,021
stare into each other's eyes
400
00:15:57,023 --> 00:15:58,456
for four minutes
without talking.
401
00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:00,325
Okay. Wait, hang on!
402
00:16:00,327 --> 00:16:02,860
Bladder check.
403
00:16:02,862 --> 00:16:05,863
We're good to go.
404
00:16:05,865 --> 00:16:08,132
You ready?
405
00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:09,167
Yes.
406
00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:11,235
And begin.
407
00:16:26,619 --> 00:16:29,520
This is kind of creepy.
408
00:16:29,522 --> 00:16:31,289
We're not supposed to
talk during this part.
409
00:16:31,291 --> 00:16:33,925
Sorry.
410
00:16:39,866 --> 00:16:42,734
This is kind of creepy.
411
00:16:42,736 --> 00:16:44,535
Do you want to stop?
412
00:16:44,537 --> 00:16:46,404
I know you have trouble
with eye contact.
413
00:16:46,406 --> 00:16:49,841
Well, you have a brown fleck
414
00:16:49,843 --> 00:16:52,043
in your right iris that looks
415
00:16:52,045 --> 00:16:55,713
like a Formula One race car.
416
00:16:55,715 --> 00:16:59,684
So... I'm just
concentrating on that.
417
00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:03,254
Plus, it's easier around people
that I'm comfortable with.
418
00:17:03,256 --> 00:17:06,991
Aw, sweetie,
I'm comfortable around you, too.
419
00:17:06,993 --> 00:17:09,594
Of course you are,
I'm warm and soothing.
420
00:17:11,431 --> 00:17:14,265
I'm like a human bowl
of tomato soup.
421
00:17:14,267 --> 00:17:17,335
I meant more like
a little brother.
422
00:17:17,337 --> 00:17:19,437
Oh.
423
00:17:19,439 --> 00:17:22,306
Well, I suppose I do think
of you as a sister.
424
00:17:24,144 --> 00:17:26,844
And sometimes, a mother.
425
00:17:26,846 --> 00:17:28,913
It's getting creepy again.
426
00:17:37,257 --> 00:17:38,256
What?
427
00:17:38,258 --> 00:17:40,258
Just thinking about the day
428
00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:41,659
I met you and Leonard.
429
00:17:41,661 --> 00:17:43,428
It was a Monday afternoon.
430
00:17:43,430 --> 00:17:46,631
You joined us for Indian food.
431
00:17:46,633 --> 00:17:49,033
Can you believe
it's been eight years?
432
00:17:49,035 --> 00:17:52,003
Yeah, and you're
still eating our food.
433
00:17:55,341 --> 00:17:56,874
I... can't remember a time
434
00:17:56,876 --> 00:17:59,677
you guys weren't in my life.
435
00:17:59,679 --> 00:18:02,246
I remember it perfectly.
436
00:18:03,450 --> 00:18:05,983
But I have an eidetic memory.
437
00:18:05,985 --> 00:18:08,553
If you're interested,
I also remember
438
00:18:08,555 --> 00:18:11,289
how much you owe us
for the food.
439
00:18:13,693 --> 00:18:14,959
(alarm beeping)
440
00:18:14,961 --> 00:18:17,528
That's it.
441
00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:18,796
That wasn't so bad.
442
00:18:18,798 --> 00:18:20,031
No, it wasn't.
443
00:18:20,033 --> 00:18:21,732
Uh, now let's tabulate
444
00:18:21,734 --> 00:18:23,034
the results of the experiment.
445
00:18:23,036 --> 00:18:24,735
Okay.
446
00:18:24,737 --> 00:18:28,706
I think it's safe to say that
you're not in love with me
447
00:18:28,708 --> 00:18:30,641
and I'm not in love with you.
448
00:18:30,643 --> 00:18:33,277
And psychology has once again
449
00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:37,081
proved itself the doofus
of the sciences.
450
00:18:37,083 --> 00:18:39,417
Well, maybe.
451
00:18:39,419 --> 00:18:41,385
But I'm still glad we did it.
452
00:18:41,387 --> 00:18:43,955
I do feel closer to you.
453
00:18:43,957 --> 00:18:46,958
And I, you.
454
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:49,927
And yes, that's
how you say that.
455
00:18:51,865 --> 00:18:55,166
Yeah, so, given our
newfound intimacy,
456
00:18:55,168 --> 00:18:56,834
I'd say we have
457
00:18:56,836 --> 00:18:58,302
some hard choices to make.
458
00:18:58,304 --> 00:18:59,470
Like what?
459
00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:02,807
Gary Con--
do we fly or drive?
460
00:19:02,809 --> 00:19:04,208
Do we wear costumes?
461
00:19:04,210 --> 00:19:06,410
And if so...
462
00:19:06,412 --> 00:19:09,213
who gets to be Gary?
463
00:19:14,354 --> 00:19:17,021
Thank you for walking me home.
464
00:19:17,023 --> 00:19:19,423
I just want to make sure
you get there safe.
465
00:19:21,394 --> 00:19:24,729
Well, this is me.
466
00:19:26,065 --> 00:19:28,065
It's been a very
interesting evening.
467
00:19:28,067 --> 00:19:29,567
It really has.
468
00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:34,272
ALL: Surprise!
Aah!
469
00:19:36,776 --> 00:19:39,844
And after I let you be Gary!