1
00:00:04,204 --> 00:00:06,105
Okay, we're headed out--
See you later.

2
00:00:06,107 --> 00:00:07,306
Before you leave,

3
00:00:07,308 --> 00:00:09,775
could you test these
noise-cancelling headphones?

4
00:00:09,777 --> 00:00:10,776
Yeah, sure.

5
00:00:10,778 --> 00:00:11,844
Okay.

6
00:00:13,781 --> 00:00:14,780
Go ahead.

7
00:00:14,782 --> 00:00:17,549
Hello, can you
hear me?

8
00:00:20,621 --> 00:00:22,154
Sheldon, I haven't changed
the filter

9
00:00:22,156 --> 00:00:24,089
in the water pitcher
in two years.

10
00:00:27,128 --> 00:00:31,030
Uh, Bernadette's nickname for
you is the virgin piña colada.

11
00:00:34,135 --> 00:00:38,203
Your George Lucas autograph
is really a "me" autograph.

12
00:00:40,307 --> 00:00:43,308
Yeah, well, once I was too lazy
to walk across the hall,

13
00:00:43,310 --> 00:00:45,044
so I used your toothbrush.

14
00:00:47,048 --> 00:00:49,181
Ooh, and one time
when you were asleep,

15
00:00:49,183 --> 00:00:51,016
Amy totally
took off her...

16
00:00:51,018 --> 00:00:53,085
And that's why
you're the best roommate ever.

17
00:00:54,321 --> 00:00:56,722
Aw...

18
00:00:56,724 --> 00:00:58,157
Now I'm sad I didn't hear it.

19
00:00:58,159 --> 00:01:00,826
So what do you need
the headphones for?

20
00:01:00,828 --> 00:01:02,227
Well, I've been
struggling for months

21
00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:04,663
to come up with
a theory of dark matter

22
00:01:04,665 --> 00:01:06,198
that doesn't
make protons decay.

23
00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:08,033
I'm hoping to
finally tackle it

24
00:01:08,035 --> 00:01:10,035
by optimizing my
work environment.

25
00:01:10,037 --> 00:01:14,573
See, I've got, uh, my tea is at
the perfect sipping temperature.

26
00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:17,009
Uh, I have fleece-lined
boxer shorts

27
00:01:17,011 --> 00:01:18,510
to keep my tushie toasty.

28
00:01:18,512 --> 00:01:20,045
And then, oh,
last but not least,

29
00:01:20,047 --> 00:01:23,048
this inspirational cat poster,

30
00:01:23,050 --> 00:01:25,050
improved with
the reassuring face

31
00:01:25,052 --> 00:01:27,119
of physics renegade
Richard Feynman.

32
00:01:30,224 --> 00:01:33,192
Is that why you had to take him
to Office Depot last night?

33
00:01:33,194 --> 00:01:35,260
I don't want to talk about it.

34
00:01:36,230 --> 00:01:37,696
There, the place is all yours.

35
00:01:37,698 --> 00:01:38,697
Yeah, have fun.

36
00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:40,699
Oh, I will--
nothing more fun

37
00:01:40,701 --> 00:01:42,067
than a paradigm-shifting
evening of science.

38
00:01:42,069 --> 00:01:43,268
(scoffs)

39
00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:45,604
And you thought it was
soaping me up in the shower.

40
00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:46,605
(chuckles)

41
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:47,606
Bye.

42
00:01:47,608 --> 00:01:50,109
Okay.

43
00:01:50,111 --> 00:01:52,177
Here we go.

44
00:01:54,081 --> 00:01:55,981
Proton decay.

45
00:01:57,551 --> 00:01:59,151
Proton decay.

46
00:02:00,087 --> 00:02:02,121
Proton decay.

47
00:02:03,224 --> 00:02:04,857
Proton decay.

48
00:02:06,227 --> 00:02:08,327
Proton decay.

49
00:02:09,296 --> 00:02:10,729
Proton decay.

50
00:02:10,731 --> 00:02:12,064
LEONARD:
Hey, we're home.

51
00:02:12,066 --> 00:02:13,165
(screams)

52
00:02:14,568 --> 00:02:16,401
Any progress?

53
00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:17,603
How could there be?!

54
00:02:17,605 --> 00:02:19,171
With these constant
interruptions.

55
00:02:21,242 --> 00:02:25,010
I love him, but if he's broken,
let's not get a new one.

56
00:02:26,413 --> 00:02:30,149
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪

57
00:02:30,151 --> 00:02:33,285
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪

58
00:02:33,287 --> 00:02:35,120
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪

59
00:02:35,122 --> 00:02:37,756
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪

60
00:02:37,758 --> 00:02:40,125
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪<i> We built the pyramids</i> ♪

61
00:02:40,127 --> 00:02:42,995
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪

62
00:02:42,997 --> 00:02:44,930
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪

63
00:02:44,932 --> 00:02:46,498
♪<i> Bang!</i> ♪

64
00:02:54,441 --> 00:02:55,774
What are you doing?

65
00:02:55,776 --> 00:02:57,109
It's time to go.

66
00:02:57,111 --> 00:02:59,144
I'm not going to work today.

67
00:02:59,146 --> 00:03:01,146
And would you like
to know why?

68
00:03:01,148 --> 00:03:04,149
Ah, you're upset because you
spent the whole night working

69
00:03:04,151 --> 00:03:06,151
on dark matter
and didn't make a breakthrough,

70
00:03:06,153 --> 00:03:08,153
and now you're worried you made
a huge mistake switching fields,

71
00:03:08,155 --> 00:03:10,289
and you're gonna sit around
and sulk all day?

72
00:03:10,291 --> 00:03:13,091
Like a big old baby.

73
00:03:14,662 --> 00:03:16,028
Call me
if you need anything.

74
00:03:17,631 --> 00:03:19,631
(Sheldon sighs, door closes)

75
00:03:19,633 --> 00:03:23,001
I've been cooped up
in here too long.

76
00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:25,871
Maybe I need some fresh air.

77
00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:32,110
(inhales, exhales)

78
00:03:36,217 --> 00:03:39,284
(Penny groans,
grunts)

79
00:03:44,225 --> 00:03:45,224
Penny?

80
00:03:45,226 --> 00:03:46,391
(grunts)

81
00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:47,392
Penny?

82
00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:48,393
(grunts)

83
00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:50,229
Penny?
(grunts)

84
00:03:51,832 --> 00:03:53,832
Ugh, what?

85
00:03:53,834 --> 00:03:55,701
You sounded in distress.

86
00:03:55,703 --> 00:03:57,336
I was worried something
unpleasant was happening to you.

87
00:03:57,338 --> 00:03:59,171
Like a murder.

88
00:03:59,173 --> 00:04:01,807
Or spontaneous coitus
with Leonard.

89
00:04:03,844 --> 00:04:05,177
Oh, I'm just doing
this awful workout.

90
00:04:05,179 --> 00:04:06,511
I hate it.

91
00:04:06,513 --> 00:04:09,014
Well, if you hate it,
then why are you doing it?

92
00:04:09,016 --> 00:04:10,682
Although I could ask
the same question

93
00:04:10,684 --> 00:04:12,517
about coitus with Leonard.

94
00:04:12,519 --> 00:04:15,354
I don't know-- I guess
I like that I hate it.

95
00:04:15,356 --> 00:04:16,888
It makes me work harder.

96
00:04:16,890 --> 00:04:18,690
And to clarify...

97
00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:20,325
The exercise, Sheldon.

98
00:04:21,895 --> 00:04:23,862
Shouldn't you be getting
ready for work?

99
00:04:23,864 --> 00:04:25,197
I'm not going.

100
00:04:25,199 --> 00:04:26,732
Would you like to know why?

101
00:04:26,734 --> 00:04:29,368
Uh, you're sad about not getting
anything done last night,

102
00:04:29,370 --> 00:04:31,470
so you're gonna sit around
and pout about it?

103
00:04:32,873 --> 00:04:35,274
Boy, I'm not nearly as
mysterious as I think I am.

104
00:04:37,578 --> 00:04:38,877
I invented a game.

105
00:04:38,879 --> 00:04:40,545
You want to play?
Sure.

106
00:04:40,547 --> 00:04:42,948
It's called
"Emily or Cinnamon?"

107
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:46,385
I give you actual quotes
I've heard Raj say,

108
00:04:46,387 --> 00:04:50,455
and you guess if he was talking
to his girlfriend or his dog.

109
00:04:54,295 --> 00:04:56,128
Go ahead, make fun.

110
00:04:56,130 --> 00:04:57,229
You can't embarrass me.

111
00:04:57,231 --> 00:04:58,597
I've got a beautiful
girlfriend

112
00:04:58,599 --> 00:05:01,300
and a dog who loves me so much
she drinks my bathwater.

113
00:05:03,737 --> 00:05:07,139
Okay, who was he talking to,
Emily or Cinnamon:

114
00:05:07,141 --> 00:05:09,741
"I want you to know,
the bed feels so lonely

115
00:05:09,743 --> 00:05:11,476
when you're not in it."

116
00:05:17,985 --> 00:05:20,052
I may not be liking
this game so much.

117
00:05:21,588 --> 00:05:23,155
Cinnamon.
Give me another one.

118
00:05:24,091 --> 00:05:25,657
Okay, Emily or Cinnamon:

119
00:05:25,659 --> 00:05:27,592
"Check it out,
I got us matching sweaters!"

120
00:05:27,594 --> 00:05:30,028
We all got the Christmas card--
Cinnamon.

121
00:05:31,598 --> 00:05:35,000
You know, a man can care deeply
about a woman and a pet.

122
00:05:35,002 --> 00:05:36,001
It's not strange.

123
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:37,002
Ooh, Emily.

124
00:05:37,004 --> 00:05:39,071
I heard him say that
to Emily.

125
00:05:40,274 --> 00:05:42,441
Hey, I thought
you were staying home.

126
00:05:42,443 --> 00:05:44,609
Yeah, I was, but after
talking to Penny,

127
00:05:44,611 --> 00:05:46,445
I realized something.

128
00:05:46,447 --> 00:05:49,614
I... first, she's trying much
harder to stay attractive

129
00:05:49,616 --> 00:05:51,717
in this relationship
than you are.

130
00:05:56,123 --> 00:05:57,456
And second...

131
00:05:57,458 --> 00:06:00,459
the reason I may not be
progressing in my research is

132
00:06:00,461 --> 00:06:04,296
I've created too pleasant
of an environment for myself.

133
00:06:04,298 --> 00:06:05,464
What do you mean?

134
00:06:05,466 --> 00:06:08,133
According to a classic
psychological experiment

135
00:06:08,135 --> 00:06:11,303
by Yerkes and Dodson, in order
to maximize performance,

136
00:06:11,305 --> 00:06:14,506
one must create a state
of productive anxiety.

137
00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:18,310
So I'd like to ask you all
to do something for me.

138
00:06:18,312 --> 00:06:20,178
Keep me on my toes.

139
00:06:20,180 --> 00:06:22,381
(stammers)
Just throw me off my game.

140
00:06:22,383 --> 00:06:26,251
E-Essentially, go out of your
way to make my life miserable.

141
00:06:28,822 --> 00:06:30,355
Hold on.

142
00:06:30,357 --> 00:06:32,157
What's in it for us?

143
00:06:32,159 --> 00:06:34,059
Well, I suppose...
Okay, we'll do it!

144
00:06:42,903 --> 00:06:44,336
Done.

145
00:06:44,338 --> 00:06:45,904
33 seconds.

146
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,839
Okay, that'll be
our baseline.

147
00:06:47,841 --> 00:06:49,374
You know, I don't
want to tell you

148
00:06:49,376 --> 00:06:52,010
how to do your job, but when
a mouse completes a maze,

149
00:06:52,012 --> 00:06:54,012
it gets a food pellet.

150
00:06:54,014 --> 00:06:57,549
It also gets its brain
plucked out with tweezers.

151
00:06:57,551 --> 00:07:00,685
And his last meal was
a food pellet?

152
00:07:00,687 --> 00:07:02,120
You're a monster.

153
00:07:04,525 --> 00:07:06,525
All right, next,
we're gonna introduce

154
00:07:06,527 --> 00:07:08,894
an anxiety-inducing stimulus,
measure your stress levels

155
00:07:08,896 --> 00:07:10,429
and see how it affects
your problem-solving rate.

156
00:07:10,431 --> 00:07:11,530
Very well.

157
00:07:11,532 --> 00:07:14,266
And good luck--
I'm a pretty laid-back guy.

158
00:07:16,069 --> 00:07:17,536
Ready?

159
00:07:17,538 --> 00:07:18,770
Begin.

160
00:07:21,708 --> 00:07:24,276
(squeezes balloon)

161
00:07:41,395 --> 00:07:42,928
Why'd you pop it?

162
00:07:42,930 --> 00:07:45,130
I'm sorry, I was aiming
for your heart.

163
00:07:48,469 --> 00:07:49,901
Look, I know you
don't like it,

164
00:07:49,903 --> 00:07:51,470
but that's the point
of the experiment.

165
00:07:51,472 --> 00:07:52,971
I need to irritate you

166
00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:55,407
to find your optimal
anxiety zone.

167
00:07:55,409 --> 00:07:57,776
And you said no to
tickling, polka music

168
00:07:57,778 --> 00:08:00,078
or watching me
eat a banana.

169
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:02,647
Who eats them
horizontally?!

170
00:08:04,117 --> 00:08:06,184
My mother said that's
how good girls do it.

171
00:08:10,591 --> 00:08:12,591
Perhaps this was
a waste of time.

172
00:08:12,593 --> 00:08:14,426
Sheldon,

173
00:08:14,428 --> 00:08:16,428
you're a remarkable scientist.

174
00:08:16,430 --> 00:08:18,597
Just be patient-- I'm sure
you'll find the breakthrough

175
00:08:18,599 --> 00:08:19,965
you've been looking for.

176
00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:21,433
Thank you.

177
00:08:21,435 --> 00:08:23,268
And if you only
do solid research

178
00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:26,271
instead of making
a groundbreaking discovery,

179
00:08:26,273 --> 00:08:27,672
what does it matter?

180
00:08:27,674 --> 00:08:30,108
"Only do solid research"?!

181
00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:33,111
Uh... I come to you for help,
and you insult me?!

182
00:08:33,113 --> 00:08:35,280
I thought the least that
you would do would be...

183
00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:37,115
Look, your anxiety levels
are right in the zone.

184
00:08:37,117 --> 00:08:38,517
Really?

185
00:08:38,519 --> 00:08:40,118
Oh, that's fantastic.

186
00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:41,453
N-Now, wait,
they're dropping.

187
00:08:41,455 --> 00:08:42,454
Why are they dropping?

188
00:08:42,456 --> 00:08:44,523
Because you're happy
they're elevated.

189
00:08:44,525 --> 00:08:46,324
Oh, that is infuriating!

190
00:08:46,326 --> 00:08:47,692
Ooh, look, they went
back up again.

191
00:08:47,694 --> 00:08:48,693
Terrific.

192
00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:50,529
Oh, no, they went
back down!

193
00:08:52,666 --> 00:08:56,668
All right, guys, what game
do you want to play?

194
00:08:56,670 --> 00:08:58,136
Let's see.

195
00:08:58,138 --> 00:09:01,540
How about
"Emily or Cinnamon?"

196
00:09:02,809 --> 00:09:04,643
You know what? I think
it's a little weird

197
00:09:04,645 --> 00:09:06,478
that you remember me
saying all these things.

198
00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:09,881
Maybe the truth is-- you're
jealous of all my relationships.

199
00:09:10,817 --> 00:09:12,984
Oh, maybe I am.

200
00:09:12,986 --> 00:09:14,519
Who wouldn't want
to be the girl,

201
00:09:14,521 --> 00:09:17,522
or possibly dog,
to hear the words:

202
00:09:17,524 --> 00:09:19,524
"You're so lucky.

203
00:09:19,526 --> 00:09:21,626
You have the
shiniest hair."

204
00:09:25,198 --> 00:09:27,198
That is a tough one.

205
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,267
Uh, I-I know he brushes
both of them.

206
00:09:31,371 --> 00:09:33,572
Gentlemen...
Yeah.

207
00:09:33,574 --> 00:09:36,708
I have figured out the perfect
way for you to irritate me.

208
00:09:36,710 --> 00:09:40,679
I'd like you to be my
intellectual sparring partners.

209
00:09:40,681 --> 00:09:43,048
From now on,
when I make an assertion,

210
00:09:43,050 --> 00:09:44,683
I need you to challenge it.

211
00:09:44,685 --> 00:09:47,919
So you just want us to disagree
with whatever you say?

212
00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:49,220
Yes.

213
00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:52,057
And you think
that's going to help?
Yes.

214
00:09:52,059 --> 00:09:54,693
Well, I don't think
that's gonna help at all.

215
00:09:54,695 --> 00:09:56,061
Oh, no, it will.

216
00:09:56,063 --> 00:09:59,698
See, by keeping my mind engaged,
I'll become more focused.

217
00:09:59,700 --> 00:10:01,866
Howard's right--
that'll never work.

218
00:10:01,868 --> 00:10:03,702
Stop fighting me on the premise.

219
00:10:03,704 --> 00:10:05,270
It's scientifically valid.

220
00:10:05,272 --> 00:10:06,705
I'm going to advance
propositions,

221
00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:08,406
I just want you to challenge me.

222
00:10:08,408 --> 00:10:11,109
I don't think that's
what you want at all.

223
00:10:12,279 --> 00:10:13,878
Why, of course it's what I want.

224
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:16,581
Why would I say it's what I want
if it's not what I want?

225
00:10:16,583 --> 00:10:19,651
Because it is what you want,
and it's not what you said.

226
00:10:21,622 --> 00:10:24,222
I ask you for one simple thing,
and you can't even do it.

227
00:10:24,224 --> 00:10:25,724
Yes, we can.
Yeah, well, then do it.

228
00:10:25,726 --> 00:10:27,292
Nah.

229
00:10:28,261 --> 00:10:30,028
You guys are the worst.

230
00:10:32,599 --> 00:10:35,133
Thank you,
I think that was helpful.

231
00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:43,074
So, whichever rep has
the best sales for the quarter

232
00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:44,576
gets a trip for two to Hawaii.

233
00:10:44,578 --> 00:10:47,278
That would be so romantic
for you and Leonard.

234
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,748
Yeah, clearly you haven't
seen him on the beach

235
00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:51,349
walking around
with his metal detector.

236
00:10:52,753 --> 00:10:54,119
If I were going to Hawaii,

237
00:10:54,121 --> 00:10:56,788
I'd spend all my time
at the Keck Observatory.

238
00:10:56,790 --> 00:10:58,623
Did you know that
the telescopes there have

239
00:10:58,625 --> 00:10:59,958
better resolution
than the Hubble?

240
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:01,593
Really?

241
00:11:01,595 --> 00:11:03,495
Want to go to Hawaii?

242
00:11:04,631 --> 00:11:05,630
(knocking on door)
SHELDON: Ladies?

243
00:11:05,632 --> 00:11:07,298
(knocks on door)
Ladies...

244
00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:08,933
(knocks on door)
Ladies?

245
00:11:08,935 --> 00:11:10,402
Come in.

246
00:11:11,438 --> 00:11:12,804
Ladies.

247
00:11:12,806 --> 00:11:14,439
What's up?

248
00:11:14,441 --> 00:11:16,608
As you may know,
I've been experimenting

249
00:11:16,610 --> 00:11:18,510
with elevated anxiety levels,

250
00:11:18,512 --> 00:11:19,611
and I thought,

251
00:11:19,613 --> 00:11:21,613
what better way
to increase my discomfort

252
00:11:21,615 --> 00:11:23,448
than to subject myself
to an evening

253
00:11:23,450 --> 00:11:25,684
of tasteless
uncensored crotch talk?

254
00:11:28,655 --> 00:11:31,623
What exactly do you think
goes on here?

255
00:11:31,625 --> 00:11:33,191
Well...

256
00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:34,793
conversations that you wouldn't
be comfortable having

257
00:11:34,795 --> 00:11:36,628
in front of the opposite sex.

258
00:11:36,630 --> 00:11:38,196
You know, who has
the best cervix.

259
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:42,634
Which sanitary napkin
is all the rage right now.

260
00:11:42,636 --> 00:11:45,870
Men's buttocks, and how you want
to pat and squeeze them.

261
00:11:47,641 --> 00:11:50,141
We were talking
about Penny's job.

262
00:11:50,143 --> 00:11:52,143
And how difficult it is to do

263
00:11:52,145 --> 00:11:54,145
when she's bloated,
cranky and crampy?

264
00:11:54,147 --> 00:11:56,214
Continue.

265
00:11:58,151 --> 00:12:00,151
Sheldon, we are just people.

266
00:12:00,153 --> 00:12:02,353
We talk about the same things
you guys talk about.

267
00:12:02,355 --> 00:12:05,023
You talk about
if werewolves can swim?

268
00:12:05,025 --> 00:12:06,658
See, Leonard says yes,

269
00:12:06,660 --> 00:12:09,494
but I say it depends on
if the human could swim

270
00:12:09,496 --> 00:12:10,495
before he was bitten.

271
00:12:10,497 --> 00:12:11,896
What do you think?

272
00:12:13,033 --> 00:12:15,834
Let's just talk
about our periods.

273
00:12:15,836 --> 00:12:17,702
No, hold on.

274
00:12:17,704 --> 00:12:20,705
All canines instinctively know
how to swim.

275
00:12:20,707 --> 00:12:23,341
Why wouldn't a werewolf have
the same abilities?

276
00:12:23,343 --> 00:12:25,910
Well, they're not
a hundred percent wolf.

277
00:12:25,912 --> 00:12:28,680
They're a werewolf--
that's only part wolf.

278
00:12:28,682 --> 00:12:30,682
It's like comparing
apples to oranges.

279
00:12:30,684 --> 00:12:32,717
Thank you.

280
00:12:32,719 --> 00:12:35,353
Oh, and technically, it's apples
that turn into were-oranges

281
00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:36,755
when the moon is full.

282
00:12:38,058 --> 00:12:40,391
Hey, this is fun.

283
00:12:40,393 --> 00:12:42,527
We should do it sometime
when you aren't all PMS'ing.

284
00:12:42,529 --> 00:12:43,762
Bye.

285
00:12:47,033 --> 00:12:51,136
(Darth Vader breathes, the Joker
laughs, Godzilla roars)

286
00:12:52,539 --> 00:12:54,038
What is going on?

287
00:12:54,040 --> 00:12:55,406
Oh.

288
00:12:55,408 --> 00:12:58,076
Uh, I need to keep my anxiety
at the right level,

289
00:12:58,078 --> 00:13:01,713
so I'm using Darth Vader,
the Joker, and Godzilla's roar

290
00:13:01,715 --> 00:13:03,481
to keep me in that sweet spot.

291
00:13:05,786 --> 00:13:07,952
Uh, I tried including
Taylor Swift in the mix,

292
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:10,021
but turns out I love her.

293
00:13:12,726 --> 00:13:15,260
Well, at least listen to it
through headphones.

294
00:13:15,262 --> 00:13:17,028
I'm trying to sleep.
Good night.

295
00:13:18,064 --> 00:13:19,697
Boy!

296
00:13:21,067 --> 00:13:24,135
Taylor was right-- haters gonna
hate, hate, hate, hate, hate.

297
00:13:27,574 --> 00:13:30,141
You've been working
so much lately,

298
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:32,143
I'm glad you didn't forget
about date night.

299
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:33,645
Of course.

300
00:13:35,916 --> 00:13:36,915
Sheldon.

301
00:13:36,917 --> 00:13:38,750
Yeah.

302
00:13:38,752 --> 00:13:41,586
Maybe you want to put the
notebook away and talk to me.

303
00:13:41,588 --> 00:13:43,588
(stammers)
I can do both.

304
00:13:43,590 --> 00:13:46,157
No, my brain is working
at optimal capacity.

305
00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:48,159
No, I can have
a conversation with you

306
00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:52,163
and solve the dark matter proton
decay problem at the same time.

307
00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:54,933
Fine.
How was your day?

308
00:13:54,935 --> 00:13:56,201
Oh, you said it.

309
00:13:58,772 --> 00:14:00,271
Sheldon.

310
00:14:00,273 --> 00:14:01,773
Sheldon, I'm
worried about you.

311
00:14:01,775 --> 00:14:03,775
You're not eating,

312
00:14:03,777 --> 00:14:05,777
you haven't
slept in days,

313
00:14:05,779 --> 00:14:08,213
and, to be honest, that
cap is starting to smell.

314
00:14:09,616 --> 00:14:11,182
I know.

315
00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:13,852
It's replaced Godzilla as
my principle source of anxiety.

316
00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:21,626
Okay, so it's one vote Emily,
one vote Cinnamon.

317
00:14:21,628 --> 00:14:23,561
Penny, you're
the tiebreaker.

318
00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:28,166
Say the quote again.

319
00:14:28,168 --> 00:14:32,237
"It's just so perfect
that we're both Libras."

320
00:14:37,644 --> 00:14:39,811
Wow, this is hard.

321
00:14:39,813 --> 00:14:40,812
I'm gonna say
Cinnamon.

322
00:14:40,814 --> 00:14:42,947
Yes!
Yes!
Come on!

323
00:14:44,317 --> 00:14:45,884
That was the last one,
I promise.

324
00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:47,218
We won't play anymore.

325
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:48,853
Thank you.

326
00:14:48,855 --> 00:14:50,822
'Cause if she ever found out,
it would hurt her feelings.

327
00:14:50,824 --> 00:14:53,858
Emily's feelings?

328
00:14:53,860 --> 00:14:55,827
Yes, Emily.

329
00:14:55,829 --> 00:14:57,562
Nice!
Yay!
Good job!

330
00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:00,999
Whatever.
Where's Sheldon?

331
00:15:01,001 --> 00:15:02,400
Date night.

332
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:04,002
Mmm, that can't be
much fun for Amy.

333
00:15:04,004 --> 00:15:06,571
You know, at work today,
he tried his first Red Bull.

334
00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:07,672
What happened?

335
00:15:07,674 --> 00:15:08,840
He chased a squirrel

336
00:15:08,842 --> 00:15:10,909
around the quad
for a while and...

337
00:15:12,012 --> 00:15:14,078
...then threw up in my car.

338
00:15:16,016 --> 00:15:18,182
Don't you think you should
make him stop all this?

339
00:15:18,184 --> 00:15:20,752
I don't know-- he's not
really hurting anybody.

340
00:15:20,754 --> 00:15:24,756
You didn't have to scoop vomit
out of your glove compartment.

341
00:15:24,758 --> 00:15:26,557
He is getting
a lot of work done.

342
00:15:26,559 --> 00:15:29,193
He had a pretty interesting
take on proton decay.

343
00:15:29,195 --> 00:15:33,031
Wow, if he cracks that,
it's a game changer, guys.

344
00:15:33,033 --> 00:15:35,033
It'll completely redefine
our understanding

345
00:15:35,035 --> 00:15:36,434
of the physical universe.

346
00:15:37,871 --> 00:15:40,405
Hmm, it would.

347
00:15:40,407 --> 00:15:42,807
Okay, back to
"Emily or Cinnamon?"

348
00:15:44,244 --> 00:15:48,780
"How can such a little girl
eat such a big steak?"

349
00:15:53,386 --> 00:15:54,619
Sheldon,

350
00:15:54,621 --> 00:15:56,554
I want you to take
that cap off.

351
00:15:56,556 --> 00:16:00,558
That nagging tone is
helping my anxiety, yeah.

352
00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,927
But if you could maybe just go
ten percent less shrill,

353
00:16:02,929 --> 00:16:05,563
that'd really put the zip-a-dee
in my doo-dah.

354
00:16:05,565 --> 00:16:07,899
I'm sorry, but
you know we agreed

355
00:16:07,901 --> 00:16:09,767
not to bring work
to date night.

356
00:16:09,769 --> 00:16:12,103
There you go, perfect.

357
00:16:12,105 --> 00:16:14,105
Sheldon, stop it,
I'm not kidding.

358
00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:17,075
Take the cap off, and
put the notebook away.

359
00:16:17,077 --> 00:16:20,745
But after months of struggling,
I'm finally making progress.

360
00:16:20,747 --> 00:16:23,581
You don't need to drive yourself
crazy in order to be productive.

361
00:16:23,583 --> 00:16:25,583
Or do I, hmm?

362
00:16:25,585 --> 00:16:27,952
Sir Isaac Newton wrote
his<i> Principia</i>

363
00:16:27,954 --> 00:16:30,455
while convinced he was
an armadillo.

364
00:16:30,457 --> 00:16:31,956
That's not true.

365
00:16:31,958 --> 00:16:33,591
Yeah, well, maybe it is,
maybe it isn't.

366
00:16:33,593 --> 00:16:35,193
I have been
hallucinating lately.

367
00:16:37,797 --> 00:16:39,430
Sheldon, this has to stop.

368
00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:41,966
You need to get some sleep
and take care of yourself.

369
00:16:41,968 --> 00:16:44,769
Amy, I have gotten more done
in the last few days

370
00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:46,938
than I have since I made
the switch to dark matter.

371
00:16:46,940 --> 00:16:50,441
What if I stop doing this,
and it all goes away?

372
00:16:50,443 --> 00:16:53,978
Your thoughts and ideas come
from you, not from your anxiety.

373
00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:55,446
Hmm, perhaps.

374
00:16:55,448 --> 00:16:57,181
But I'm not taking
the cap off.

375
00:16:58,118 --> 00:17:00,118
It's one thing to make
yourself miserable,

376
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:02,487
but you're making everyone
around you miserable, too.

377
00:17:02,489 --> 00:17:06,024
Now, I'm telling you for the
last time-- take the cap off.

378
00:17:06,026 --> 00:17:07,859
Oh!

379
00:17:07,861 --> 00:17:09,027
Really?

380
00:17:09,029 --> 00:17:10,828
What if I don't?

381
00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:14,098
And before you answer that,
can I have my dessert?

382
00:17:15,635 --> 00:17:17,702
And then she
threw me out.

383
00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:23,007
Me, her very
own boyfriend.

384
00:17:23,009 --> 00:17:25,643
When all I've done is try
to help humanity reach

385
00:17:25,645 --> 00:17:28,613
a more profound understanding
of the world we live in.

386
00:17:32,018 --> 00:17:33,184
Yeah, well, women--

387
00:17:33,186 --> 00:17:35,086
what are you gonna do?

388
00:17:37,991 --> 00:17:40,224
I knew you'd understand,
Armadillo Isaac Newton.

389
00:17:44,864 --> 00:17:47,498
Okay...

390
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:49,867
Here we are.

391
00:17:49,869 --> 00:17:51,869
Hey.

392
00:17:51,871 --> 00:17:53,704
What are you trying to pull?

393
00:17:53,706 --> 00:17:57,008
The president of
science isn't in here.

394
00:17:57,010 --> 00:17:59,911
You lie down, he'll be here
in a minute.

395
00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:03,047
Okay.

396
00:18:03,049 --> 00:18:04,982
Hey, I thought you were
trying to trick me.

397
00:18:08,021 --> 00:18:09,854
Now, you just
get comfortable.

398
00:18:09,856 --> 00:18:12,423
No, no, comfort is the enemy.

399
00:18:12,425 --> 00:18:13,858
You know what's comfortable?

400
00:18:13,860 --> 00:18:17,295
Slippers and blankets
and panda bears.

401
00:18:18,865 --> 00:18:22,800
Imagine a panda bear with
Richard Feynman's face on it.

402
00:18:24,237 --> 00:18:27,371
Warm up the car, Leonard,
it's poster time.

403
00:18:27,373 --> 00:18:29,207
Maybe in the morning.

404
00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:30,541
Yeah, you get
some sleep.

405
00:18:30,543 --> 00:18:33,044
No, I don't want to go
to sleep-- you can't make me.

406
00:18:33,046 --> 00:18:34,378
You're right, we can't.

407
00:18:34,380 --> 00:18:35,746
Yeah, darn straight, you can't.

408
00:18:35,748 --> 00:18:37,215
Try to tell a grown man
to go to sleep...

409
00:18:37,217 --> 00:18:40,051
♪ Soft kitty ♪

410
00:18:40,053 --> 00:18:42,053
♪ Warm kitty ♪

411
00:18:42,055 --> 00:18:44,589
♪ Little ball of fur... ♪

412
00:18:44,591 --> 00:18:47,091
That's not gonna work.

413
00:18:47,093 --> 00:18:50,628
♪ Happy kitty,
sleepy kitty ♪

414
00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:51,629
♪ Purr ♪

415
00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:54,465
BOTH:
♪ Purr, purr. ♪

416
00:18:57,237 --> 00:18:59,904
You know, he can be
a lot of trouble,

417
00:18:59,906 --> 00:19:02,907
but when I see him lying
here asleep like this,

418
00:19:02,909 --> 00:19:05,443
I just think...

419
00:19:05,445 --> 00:19:08,513
how easy it would be to
hold a pillow over his face.

420
00:19:14,587 --> 00:19:17,155
Wow, you look like
you got some rest.

421
00:19:17,157 --> 00:19:19,157
Oh, I'm feeling
much better.

422
00:19:19,159 --> 00:19:21,325
And I've also been
continuing to make progress

423
00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:24,095
without artificially
raising my anxiety levels.

424
00:19:24,097 --> 00:19:26,931
I turned on the heat in my car
and some vomit came out,

425
00:19:26,933 --> 00:19:28,132
so my levels--
right up there.

426
00:19:28,134 --> 00:19:30,168
Hey, guys.

427
00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:31,669
Mind if Emily
joins us for lunch?

428
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:32,970
Yeah, sure.
Yeah, no problem.
Of course not.

429
00:19:32,972 --> 00:19:35,940
So I hear you guys have been
playing a little game.

430
00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:39,177
Well, um, we were
just kidding around.

431
00:19:39,179 --> 00:19:41,779
Well, you may think it's funny
that Raj is sweet and sensitive,

432
00:19:41,781 --> 00:19:43,848
but I think it's sexy.

433
00:19:47,453 --> 00:19:50,521
Ugh, why is there dog hair
in your mouth?