1 00:00:00,750 --> 00:00:03,780 so ***** with two slits in it and either slit is observed, 2 00:00:03,780 --> 00:00:06,290 it will not go through both slits. 3 00:00:06,290 --> 00:00:07,550 If it's unobserved, it will. 4 00:00:07,550 --> 00:00:10,980 However,if it's observed after it's left the plane but before it hits its target, 5 00:00:10,980 --> 00:00:12,780 it will not have gone though both slits. 6 00:00:12,780 --> 00:00:15,030 Agreed. What's your point? 7 00:00:15,030 --> 00:00:17,510 There's no point. I just think it's a good idea for a t-shirt. 8 00:00:23,740 --> 00:00:24,770 Excuse me. 9 00:00:24,770 --> 00:00:26,550 Hang on. 10 00:00:29,500 --> 00:00:31,440 Uh,one across is "aegean. " 11 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:35,590 Eight down is "nabokov. " 26 across is "mcm. " 12 00:00:35,590 --> 00:00:38,780 14 down is... move your finger... 13 00:00:38,780 --> 00:00:41,830 "phylum" which makes 14 across "port-au-prince" 14 00:00:43,030 --> 00:00:46,700 see,"papa doc's capitol idea," that's "port-au-prince. " 15 00:00:47,780 --> 00:00:49,690 Haiti. 16 00:00:50,290 --> 00:00:52,110 - Can I help you? - Yes. 17 00:00:54,140 --> 00:00:58,240 Um... is this the high-iq sperm bank? 18 00:00:59,580 --> 00:01:02,400 If you have to ask, maybe you shouldn't be here. 19 00:01:03,520 --> 00:01:05,080 I think this is the place. 20 00:01:06,220 --> 00:01:08,090 - Fill these out. - Thank you. 21 00:01:08,090 --> 00:01:09,250 We'll be right back. 22 00:01:09,250 --> 00:01:12,550 Oh,take your time. I'll just finish my crossword puzzle. 23 00:01:13,670 --> 00:01:16,170 Oh,wait. 24 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:24,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 25 00:01:26,190 --> 00:01:27,870 Leonard,I don't think I can do this. 26 00:01:28,250 --> 00:01:30,280 What,are you kidding? You're a semi-pro. 27 00:01:31,760 --> 00:01:34,280 No. We are committing genetic fraud. 28 00:01:34,280 --> 00:01:38,590 There's no guarantee that our sperm is going to generate high-iq offspring. Think about that. 29 00:01:38,590 --> 00:01:42,260 I have a sister with the same basic dna mix who hostesses at fuddruckers. 30 00:01:43,470 --> 00:01:45,550 Sheldon,this was your idea. 31 00:01:45,550 --> 00:01:48,810 A little extra money to get fractional t-1 bandwith in the apartment. 32 00:01:48,810 --> 00:01:51,930 I know, and I do yearn for faster downloads. 33 00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:56,050 But there's some poor woman who's gonna pin her hopes on my sperm. 34 00:01:56,050 --> 00:01:59,670 What if she winds up with a toddler who doesn't know if he should use an integral or a differential 35 00:01:59,670 --> 00:02:02,210 to solve the area under a curve? 36 00:02:03,100 --> 00:02:04,770 I'm sure she'll still love him. 37 00:02:04,770 --> 00:02:06,360 I wouldn'T. 38 00:02:07,830 --> 00:02:09,440 Well,what do you want to do? 39 00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:11,580 - I want to leave. - Okay. 40 00:02:12,320 --> 00:02:13,960 What's the protocol for leaving? 41 00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:17,180 I don't know- I've never reneged on a proffer of sperm before. 42 00:02:18,610 --> 00:02:20,550 Let's try just walking out. 43 00:02:21,030 --> 00:02:22,750 Okay. 44 00:02:32,390 --> 00:02:34,680 - Bye. - Bye. Nice meeting you. 45 00:02:37,580 --> 00:02:39,190 Are you still made about the sperm bank? 46 00:02:39,190 --> 00:02:40,730 No. 47 00:02:41,770 --> 00:02:44,230 You want to hear an interesting thing about stairs? 48 00:02:45,090 --> 00:02:46,710 Not really. 49 00:02:46,710 --> 00:02:50,750 If the height of a single step 50 00:02:50,750 --> 00:02:52,840 I don't care. 51 00:02:53,960 --> 00:02:55,950 Two milli... that doesn't seem right. 52 00:02:55,950 --> 00:02:58,440 No,it's true. I did a series of experiments when I was 12. 53 00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:00,540 My father broke his clavicle. 54 00:03:01,310 --> 00:03:03,370 Is that why they sent you to boarding school? 55 00:03:03,370 --> 00:03:06,350 No. That was a result of my work with lasers. 56 00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:14,770 - new neighbor? - Evidently. 57 00:03:14,770 --> 00:03:17,730 Significant improvement over the old neighbor. 58 00:03:18,340 --> 00:03:22,420 200-pound transvestite with a skin condition? Yes,she is. 59 00:03:24,140 --> 00:03:25,540 - Oh,hi. - Hi. 60 00:03:25,540 --> 00:03:26,600 - Hi. - Hi. 61 00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:30,350 - Hi. - Hi? 62 00:03:31,020 --> 00:03:33,340 We don't mean to interrupt. We live across the hall. 63 00:03:33,340 --> 00:03:35,510 Oh,that's nice. 64 00:03:35,510 --> 00:03:37,720 Oh,no,uh,we don't live together. 65 00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:41,640 I mean,we live together, but in separate, 66 00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:44,060 heterosexual bedrooms. 67 00:03:44,060 --> 00:03:47,490 Oh. Okay,well,guess I'm your new neighbor. Penny. 68 00:03:47,490 --> 00:03:48,880 Oh. Leonard. Sheldon. 69 00:03:48,880 --> 00:03:49,910 - Hi. - Hi. 70 00:03:49,910 --> 00:03:52,520 Hi. Hi. Hi. 71 00:03:54,140 --> 00:03:57,470 Well,uh... oh,uh,welcome to the building. 72 00:03:57,470 --> 00:03:59,910 Oh,thank you. Maybe we can have coffee sometime. 73 00:03:59,910 --> 00:04:01,130 - Oh,great. - Great. 74 00:04:01,130 --> 00:04:03,040 - Great. - Great. 75 00:04:04,860 --> 00:04:06,630 - Well,uh,bye. - Bye. 76 00:04:06,630 --> 00:04:08,860 - Bye. - Bye. 77 00:04:11,190 --> 00:04:12,830 Should we have invited her for lunch? 78 00:04:12,830 --> 00:04:15,660 No. We're gonna start season two of battlestar galactica. 79 00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:18,660 We already watched the season two dvds. 80 00:04:18,660 --> 00:04:20,670 Not with commentary. 81 00:04:22,630 --> 00:04:26,500 I think we should be good neighbors and invite her over, make her feel welcome. 82 00:04:27,010 --> 00:04:30,310 We never invited louie-slash-louise over. 83 00:04:30,910 --> 00:04:32,600 Well... and that was wrong of us. 84 00:04:32,600 --> 00:04:34,420 We need to widen our circle. 85 00:04:34,420 --> 00:04:37,350 I have a very wide circle. 86 00:04:37,350 --> 00:04:40,030 I have 212 friends on myspace. 87 00:04:41,550 --> 00:04:43,680 Yes,and you've never met one of them. 88 00:04:44,360 --> 00:04:46,510 That's the beauty of it. 89 00:04:48,260 --> 00:04:50,410 I'm gonna invite her over. 90 00:04:50,410 --> 00:04:53,020 We'll have a nice meal and... chat. 91 00:04:53,020 --> 00:04:56,410 Chat? We don't chat. At least not offline. 92 00:04:58,220 --> 00:05:01,340 Well,it's not difficult. You just listen to what she says 93 00:05:01,340 --> 00:05:04,140 and then you say something appropriate in response. 94 00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:07,140 To what end? 95 00:05:08,460 --> 00:05:10,270 Hi. Again. 96 00:05:10,270 --> 00:05:12,860 - Hi. - Hi. 97 00:05:13,530 --> 00:05:16,870 Anyway,um... we brought home indian food. 98 00:05:17,590 --> 00:05:18,970 And,um... 99 00:05:18,970 --> 00:05:21,440 I know that moving can be stressful, 100 00:05:21,440 --> 00:05:23,510 and,and,I find that when I'm undergoing stress, 101 00:05:23,510 --> 00:05:27,050 that good food and company can have a comforting effect. 102 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:31,200 Also, curry is a natural laxative, and I don't have to tell you, 103 00:05:31,200 --> 00:05:36,180 that,you know,a clean colon is just one less thing to worry about. 104 00:05:37,740 --> 00:05:40,750 Leonard,I'm no expert here, but I believe in the context of a luncheon invitation, 105 00:05:40,750 --> 00:05:43,540 you might want to skip the reference to bowel movements. 106 00:05:43,540 --> 00:05:45,930 Oh,you're inviting me over to eat? 107 00:05:45,930 --> 00:05:47,960 Uh... yes. 108 00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:50,050 Oh,that's so nice. I'd love to. 109 00:05:50,050 --> 00:05:51,240 Great. 110 00:05:51,240 --> 00:05:54,370 So,what do you guys do for fun around here? 111 00:05:54,370 --> 00:05:57,110 Well,today we tried masturbating for money. 112 00:06:00,690 --> 00:06:04,180 Our whole universe was in a hot,dense state 113 00:06:04,180 --> 00:06:08,190 then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... wait! 114 00:06:08,190 --> 00:06:10,980 The earth began to cool the autotrophs began to drool, 115 00:06:10,980 --> 00:06:13,370 neanderthals developed tools we built the wall 116 00:06:13,370 --> 00:06:15,520 we built the pyramids math,science,history, 117 00:06:15,520 --> 00:06:17,910 unraveling the mystery that all started 118 00:06:17,910 --> 00:06:19,030 with a big bang bang! 119 00:06:19,030 --> 00:06:21,030 -=www.ydy.com/bbs=- proudly presents... 120 00:06:21,030 --> 00:06:22,700 Sync: cflily -=www.ydy.com/bbs=- 121 00:06:22,700 --> 00:06:24,050 THE BIG BANG THEOTY Season 01 Episode 01 122 00:06:24,140 --> 00:06:25,880 yourself at home. 123 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:27,550 Okay. Thank you. 124 00:06:27,550 --> 00:06:29,330 You're very welcome. 125 00:06:33,040 --> 00:06:35,940 This looks like some serious stuff. Leonard,did you do this? 126 00:06:35,940 --> 00:06:38,110 Actually,that's my work. 127 00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:39,890 Wow. 128 00:06:39,890 --> 00:06:44,760 Yeah. Well,it's just some quantum mechanics with a little string theory doodling around the edges. 129 00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:46,400 That part there, that's just a joke. 130 00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:49,490 It's a spoof of the born-oppenheimer approximation. 131 00:06:50,830 --> 00:06:54,380 So you're like one of those beautiful mind genius guys. 132 00:06:55,320 --> 00:06:56,760 Yeah. 133 00:06:57,890 --> 00:06:59,310 This is really impressive. 134 00:06:59,310 --> 00:07:01,880 I have a board. If you like boards, this is my board. 135 00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:04,720 Holy smokes. 136 00:07:04,720 --> 00:07:08,330 If by "holy smokes" you mean a derivative restatement of the kind of stuff 137 00:07:08,330 --> 00:07:11,730 you can find scribbled on the wall of any men's room at mit,sure. 138 00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:13,610 - What? - Come on. 139 00:07:13,610 --> 00:07:16,970 Who hasn't seen this differential below "here I sit, broken-hearted"? 140 00:07:17,710 --> 00:07:21,700 At least I didn't have to invent 26 dimensions just to make the mathouome ct. 141 00:07:21,700 --> 00:07:23,370 I didn't invent them. They're there. 142 00:07:23,370 --> 00:07:24,370 In what universe? 143 00:07:24,370 --> 00:07:26,640 In all of them- that is the point. 144 00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:28,940 Uh... do you guys mind if I start? 145 00:07:28,940 --> 00:07:31,250 Um... penny... 146 00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:33,470 that's where i sit. 147 00:07:34,730 --> 00:07:36,630 So,sit next to me. 148 00:07:37,610 --> 00:07:39,920 No... I sit there. 149 00:07:40,730 --> 00:07:42,600 - What's the difference? - What's the difference? 150 00:07:42,600 --> 00:07:44,330 Here we go. 151 00:07:44,790 --> 00:07:47,770 In the winter,that seat is close enough to the radiator to remain warm, 152 00:07:47,770 --> 00:07:50,810 and yet not so close as to cause perspiration in the summer, 153 00:07:50,810 --> 00:07:54,640 it's directly in the path of a cross-breeze created by opening windows there and there 154 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:57,480 it faces the television at an angle that is neither direct, 155 00:07:57,480 --> 00:07:59,000 thus discouraging conversation, 156 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,450 nor so far wide as to create a parallax distortion. 157 00:08:01,450 --> 00:08:05,290 I could go on,but I think I've made my point. 158 00:08:07,950 --> 00:08:09,380 Do you want me to move? 159 00:08:09,380 --> 00:08:11,880 - Well... - just sit somewhere else. 160 00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:15,380 Fine. 161 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:35,090 Sheldon,sit! 162 00:08:36,330 --> 00:08:38,280 Ah. 163 00:08:39,600 --> 00:08:41,080 Well,this is nice. 164 00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:42,780 We don't have a lot of company over. 165 00:08:42,780 --> 00:08:45,550 That's not true- koothrappali and wolowitz come over all the time. 166 00:08:45,550 --> 00:08:46,610 Yes,I know,but... 167 00:08:46,610 --> 00:08:48,890 tuesday night we played klingon boggle till 1:00 in the morning. 168 00:08:48,890 --> 00:08:50,080 Yeah,I remember. 169 00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:51,570 I resent you saying we don't have company. 170 00:08:51,570 --> 00:08:53,000 - I'm sorry. - That has negative social implications. 171 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,940 I said I'm sorry! 172 00:08:56,180 --> 00:08:59,000 So... klingon boggle? 173 00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:02,880 Yeah. It's like regular boggle,but... in klingon. 174 00:09:06,050 --> 00:09:08,990 That's probably enough about us. So,tell us about you. 175 00:09:08,990 --> 00:09:11,540 Um... me? Okay. 176 00:09:11,540 --> 00:09:15,410 I'm a sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to know. 177 00:09:15,410 --> 00:09:18,910 Yes. It tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion 178 00:09:18,910 --> 00:09:23,010 that the sun's apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth 179 00:09:23,010 --> 00:09:25,880 somehow affects your personality. 180 00:09:27,820 --> 00:09:29,640 Participate in the what? 181 00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:34,530 I think what sheldon's trying to say is that sagittarius wouldn't have been our first guess. 182 00:09:34,530 --> 00:09:37,390 Oh,yeah. A lot of people think I'm a water sign. Penny: 183 00:09:37,990 --> 00:09:39,860 Okay,let's see, what else. 184 00:09:39,860 --> 00:09:41,980 Oh,I'm a vegetarian. Except for fish. 185 00:09:41,980 --> 00:09:44,480 And the occasional steak. I love steak! 186 00:09:46,760 --> 00:09:50,150 Well,that's interesting. Leonard can't process corn. 187 00:09:54,180 --> 00:09:56,580 Well,uh,do you have some sort of a job? 188 00:09:56,580 --> 00:09:59,400 Oh,yeah. I'm a waitress at the cheesecake factory. 189 00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:01,740 Oh... I love cheesecake. 190 00:10:01,740 --> 00:10:02,880 You're lactose-intolerant. 191 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:05,230 I don't eat it- I just think it's a good idea. 192 00:10:06,460 --> 00:10:08,880 Oh. Anyways,I'm also writing a screenplay. 193 00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:12,140 It's about this sensitive girl who comes to L.A. From lincoln,nebraska, 194 00:10:12,140 --> 00:10:15,580 to be an actress and winds up a waitress at the cheesecake factory. 195 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,120 So,it's based on your life. 196 00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:21,030 No,I'm from omaha. 197 00:10:24,530 --> 00:10:26,660 Well,if that was movie, I would go see it. 198 00:10:26,660 --> 00:10:28,570 I know,right? 199 00:10:28,570 --> 00:10:31,360 Okay,let's see,what else... um... 200 00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:33,590 guess that's about it. 201 00:10:33,590 --> 00:10:35,870 That's the story of penny. 202 00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:38,230 Well,it sounds wonderful. 203 00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:40,870 It was. 204 00:10:40,870 --> 00:10:43,930 Until I fell in love with a jerk! 205 00:10:47,550 --> 00:10:49,140 What's happening? 206 00:10:51,290 --> 00:10:53,650 God,you know, four years I lived with him. 207 00:10:53,650 --> 00:10:56,680 Four years- that's like as long as high school. 208 00:10:56,680 --> 00:10:59,050 It took you four years to get through high school? 209 00:11:01,390 --> 00:11:04,470 It just... I can't believe I trusted him. 210 00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:11,700 Should I say something? I feel like I should say something. 211 00:11:11,700 --> 00:11:13,700 You? No,you'll only make it worse. 212 00:11:13,700 --> 00:11:15,920 You want to know the most pathetic part? 213 00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:19,170 Even though I hate his lying, cheating guts... 214 00:11:19,690 --> 00:11:22,030 I still love him. 215 00:11:22,030 --> 00:11:23,420 Is that crazy? 216 00:11:23,420 --> 00:11:25,180 Yes. 217 00:11:26,770 --> 00:11:28,540 No,it's not crazy. 218 00:11:28,540 --> 00:11:31,770 It's uh... uh... it's a paradox. 219 00:11:31,770 --> 00:11:34,270 Paradoxes are part of nature. 220 00:11:34,270 --> 00:11:38,090 Think about light. If you look at huygens, light is a wave, 221 00:11:38,090 --> 00:11:40,030 as confirmed by the double - slit experiments, 222 00:11:40,030 --> 00:11:45,580 but then along comes albert einstein and discovers that light behaves like particles,too. 223 00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:50,570 Well,I didn't make it worse. 224 00:11:52,450 --> 00:11:54,840 I'm so sorry. I'm such a mess. 225 00:11:54,840 --> 00:11:58,790 On top of everything else, I'm all gross from moving and my stupid shower doesn't even work. 226 00:11:58,790 --> 00:12:00,830 Our shower works. 227 00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:03,690 Really? Would it be totally weird if I used it? 228 00:12:03,690 --> 00:12:04,490 Yes. 229 00:12:04,490 --> 00:12:05,470 - No. - No? 230 00:12:05,470 --> 00:12:07,410 - No. - No. 231 00:12:08,010 --> 00:12:09,410 It's right down the hall. 232 00:12:09,410 --> 00:12:12,890 Thanks. You guys are really sweet. 233 00:12:19,040 --> 00:12:21,730 well,this is an interesting development. 234 00:12:24,580 --> 00:12:25,710 How so? 235 00:12:25,710 --> 00:12:29,870 It has been some time since we've had a woman take her clothes off in our apartment. 236 00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:35,030 That's not true. Remember at thanksgiving my grandmother with alzheimer's had that episode? 237 00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:40,560 Point taken. It has been some time since we've had a woman take her clothes off, 238 00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:42,960 after which we didn't want to rip our eyes out. 239 00:12:44,450 --> 00:12:47,110 The worst part was watching her carve that turkey. 240 00:12:48,190 --> 00:12:51,350 So what exactly are you trying to accomplish here? 241 00:12:52,140 --> 00:12:53,450 Excuse me? 242 00:12:53,450 --> 00:12:55,650 That woman in there is not going to have sex with you. 243 00:12:55,650 --> 00:12:58,210 Well,I'm not trying to have sex with her. 244 00:12:58,210 --> 00:13:00,430 Oh,good. Then you won't be disappointed. 245 00:13:01,670 --> 00:13:03,660 What makes you think she wouldn't have sex with me? 246 00:13:03,660 --> 00:13:06,190 I'm a male and she's a female. 247 00:13:06,190 --> 00:13:09,060 Yes,but not of the same species. 248 00:13:09,540 --> 00:13:11,590 I'm not going to engage in hypotheticals here. 249 00:13:11,590 --> 00:13:13,610 I'm just trying to be a good neighbor. 250 00:13:13,610 --> 00:13:15,730 Oh,of course. 251 00:13:15,730 --> 00:13:20,600 That's not to say that if a carnal relationship were to develop that I wouldn't participate. 252 00:13:22,700 --> 00:13:24,660 However briefly. 253 00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:27,740 Do you think this possibility will be helped or hindered 254 00:13:27,740 --> 00:13:31,100 when she discovers your luke skywalker no-more-tears shampoo? 255 00:13:32,510 --> 00:13:34,490 It's darth vader shampoo. 256 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:38,150 luke skywalker's the conditioner. 257 00:13:40,580 --> 00:13:41,560 Wait till you see this. 258 00:13:41,560 --> 00:13:43,250 It's fantastic, unbelievable. 259 00:13:43,250 --> 00:13:45,220 See what? 260 00:13:45,600 --> 00:13:49,740 It's a stephen hawking lecture from mit in 1974. 261 00:13:49,740 --> 00:13:50,930 This isn't a good time. 262 00:13:50,930 --> 00:13:54,810 It's before he became a creepy computer voice. Leonard: 263 00:13:57,520 --> 00:13:58,900 That's great. You guys have to go. 264 00:13:58,900 --> 00:13:59,720 Why? 265 00:13:59,720 --> 00:14:00,800 It's just not a good time. 266 00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:03,010 Leonard has a lady over. 267 00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:05,670 Yeah,right- your grandmother back in town? 268 00:14:07,770 --> 00:14:09,840 No. And she's not a lady. 269 00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:11,670 She's just a new neighbor. 270 00:14:11,670 --> 00:14:14,480 Hang on,there really is a lady here? 271 00:14:14,480 --> 00:14:15,240 Uh-huh. 272 00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:18,060 And you want us out because you're anticipating coitus? 273 00:14:18,820 --> 00:14:20,540 I'm not anticipating coitus. 274 00:14:20,540 --> 00:14:21,810 So she's available for coitus? 275 00:14:21,810 --> 00:14:24,310 Can we please just stop saying "coitus"? 276 00:14:24,310 --> 00:14:27,020 Technically,that would be "coitus interruptus. " 277 00:14:27,860 --> 00:14:31,000 Hey,is there a trick to getting it to switch from tub to shower...? 278 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:34,180 Oh,hi. Sorry. Hello. 279 00:14:35,690 --> 00:14:38,600 Enchant? mademoiselle. 280 00:14:39,530 --> 00:14:42,680 Howard wolowitz caltech department of applied physics. 281 00:14:42,680 --> 00:14:44,940 You may be familiar with some of my work. 282 00:14:44,940 --> 00:14:49,830 It's currently orbiting jupiter's largest moon taking high-resolution digital photographs. 283 00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:53,970 Penny. I work at the cheesecake factory. 284 00:14:53,970 --> 00:14:56,010 Come on,I'll show you the trick with the shower. 285 00:14:56,530 --> 00:14:58,200 Bonne douche. 286 00:14:58,200 --> 00:14:59,710 I'M... I'm sorry? 287 00:14:59,710 --> 00:15:01,730 It's french for "good shower. " 288 00:15:01,730 --> 00:15:04,550 It's a sentiment I can express in six languages. 289 00:15:05,160 --> 00:15:07,950 Save it for your blog,howard. 290 00:15:08,640 --> 00:15:11,030 ϸöÍ´¿¿ìÔè 291 00:15:15,210 --> 00:15:17,710 all right, there it goes. It sticks. I'm sorry. 292 00:15:17,710 --> 00:15:18,500 Okay,thanks. 293 00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:21,430 Reyou' welcome. Oh,you're just going to step right... okay,I'll... 294 00:15:22,260 --> 00:15:24,760 - hey,leonard... - the hair products are sheldon'S. 295 00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:26,190 Okay. 296 00:15:26,190 --> 00:15:28,800 Um,can I ask you a favor? 297 00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:30,420 A favor? 298 00:15:30,420 --> 00:15:33,320 Sure,you can ask me a favor. I would do you a favor for you. 299 00:15:34,470 --> 00:15:36,070 It's okay if you say no. 300 00:15:36,070 --> 00:15:38,330 Oh,I'll probably say yes. 301 00:15:38,900 --> 00:15:42,160 It's just not the kind of thing you ask a guy you just met. 302 00:15:43,240 --> 00:15:44,630 Wow. 303 00:15:49,140 --> 00:15:52,060 I really think we should examine the chain of causality here. 304 00:15:52,060 --> 00:15:52,890 Must we? 305 00:15:52,890 --> 00:15:55,760 Event a- a beautiful woman stands naked in our shower. 306 00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:59,480 Event b- we drive halfway across town to retrieve a television set 307 00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:01,350 from the aforementioned woman's ex-boyfriend. 308 00:16:01,350 --> 00:16:06,650 Query- on what plane of existence is there even a semi-rational link between these events? 309 00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:10,450 She asked me to do her a favor,sheldon. 310 00:16:10,450 --> 00:16:13,160 Ah,yes. Well,that may be the proximal cause of our journey, 311 00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:17,760 but we both know it only exists in contradistinction to the higher level distal cause. 312 00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:18,690 Which is? 313 00:16:18,690 --> 00:16:20,740 You think with your penis. 314 00:16:21,410 --> 00:16:23,180 That's a biological impossibility. 315 00:16:23,180 --> 00:16:24,530 And you didn't have to come. 316 00:16:24,530 --> 00:16:29,650 Oh,right,yes,I could have stayed behind and watch wolowitz try to hit on penny in russian, arabic and farsi. 317 00:16:30,630 --> 00:16:32,520 Why can't she get her own tv? 318 00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:34,430 Come on,you know how it is with breakups. 319 00:16:34,430 --> 00:16:36,850 No,I don'T... and neither do you. 320 00:16:36,850 --> 00:16:39,420 I broke up with joyce kim. 321 00:16:39,420 --> 00:16:43,010 You did not break up with joyce kim. She defected to north korea. 322 00:16:43,010 --> 00:16:45,560 To mend her broken heart. 323 00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:50,980 This situation is much less complicated. 324 00:16:50,980 --> 00:16:55,290 There's some kind of dispute between penny and her ex-boyfriend as to who gets custody of the tv. 325 00:16:55,290 --> 00:16:57,660 She just wanted to avoid having a scene with him. 326 00:16:57,660 --> 00:16:59,420 So we get to have a scene with him? 327 00:16:59,420 --> 00:17:02,020 No,sheldon,there's not going to be a scene. 328 00:17:02,020 --> 00:17:03,950 There's two of us and one of him. 329 00:17:03,950 --> 00:17:06,410 Leonard,the two of us can't even carry a tv. 330 00:17:08,660 --> 00:17:11,770 So,you guys work with leonard and sheldon at the university? 331 00:17:16,990 --> 00:17:20,020 Um,I'm sorry. Do you speak english? 332 00:17:20,020 --> 00:17:22,810 Oh,he speaks english. Hecaust jn't speak to women. 333 00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:25,520 Really? Why? 334 00:17:25,520 --> 00:17:27,550 He's kind of a nerd. 335 00:17:29,930 --> 00:17:31,930 Juice box? 336 00:17:36,220 --> 00:17:37,740 I'll do the talking. Man: 337 00:17:37,740 --> 00:17:38,630 Yeah? 338 00:17:38,630 --> 00:17:40,680 Uh,hi,I'm leonard, this is sheldon. 339 00:17:40,680 --> 00:17:42,310 - Hello. - Let'S... 340 00:17:44,090 --> 00:17:46,630 uh,we're here to pick up penny's tv. 341 00:17:46,630 --> 00:17:47,590 Get lost. 342 00:17:47,590 --> 00:17:49,050 Okay,thanks for you time. 343 00:17:49,570 --> 00:17:51,290 We're not going to give up just like that. 344 00:17:51,290 --> 00:17:52,760 Leonard,the tv's in the building. 345 00:17:52,760 --> 00:17:55,760 We have been denied access to the building- ergo,we are done. 346 00:17:55,760 --> 00:17:57,190 Excuse me. 347 00:17:57,190 --> 00:18:01,060 If I were to give up on the first little hitch I never would have been able to identify the fingerprints 348 00:18:01,060 --> 00:18:04,110 of string theory in the aftermath of the big bang. 349 00:18:04,930 --> 00:18:07,480 My apologies. What's your plan? 350 00:18:21,090 --> 00:18:24,160 It's just a privilege to watch your mind at work. 351 00:18:24,910 --> 00:18:27,830 Come on,we have a combined iq of 360. 352 00:18:27,830 --> 00:18:30,870 We should be able 353 00:18:34,750 --> 00:18:36,290 what do you think their combined iq is? 354 00:18:36,290 --> 00:18:38,300 Just grab the door! 355 00:18:40,150 --> 00:18:41,860 This is it. 356 00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:44,020 I'll do the talking. 357 00:18:44,020 --> 00:18:46,500 Good thinking. I'll just be the muscle. 358 00:18:53,930 --> 00:18:55,020 Yeah? 359 00:18:55,020 --> 00:18:57,170 I'm leonard, this is sheldon. 360 00:18:57,170 --> 00:18:59,620 From the intercom. 361 00:19:00,230 --> 00:19:02,010 How the hell did you get in the building? 362 00:19:02,010 --> 00:19:05,710 Uh... we're scientists. 363 00:19:07,140 --> 00:19:09,630 Tell him about our iq. 364 00:19:21,650 --> 00:19:23,500 - Leonard... - what? 365 00:19:23,500 --> 00:19:24,700 My mom bought me those pants. 366 00:19:24,700 --> 00:19:26,930 I'm sorry. 367 00:19:26,930 --> 00:19:28,890 You're going to have to call her. 368 00:19:31,630 --> 00:19:34,740 Sheldon,I am so sorry I dragged you through this. 369 00:19:34,740 --> 00:19:38,820 It's okay. It wasn't my first pantsing and it won't be my last. 370 00:19:39,340 --> 00:19:40,930 And you were right about my motives. 371 00:19:40,930 --> 00:19:46,630 I was hoping to establish a relationship with penny that might have someday led to sex. 372 00:19:47,770 --> 00:19:49,640 Well,you got me out of my pants. 373 00:19:51,730 --> 00:19:53,480 Anyway,I've learned my lesson. 374 00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:55,430 She's out of my league, I'm done with her. 375 00:19:55,430 --> 00:19:59,840 Got my work,one day I'll win the nobel prize and then I'll die alone. 376 00:19:59,840 --> 00:20:02,890 Don't think like that. You're not going to die alone. 377 00:20:02,890 --> 00:20:05,560 Thank you,sheldon. You're a good friend. 378 00:20:07,150 --> 00:20:09,720 And you're certainly not going to win a nobel prize. 379 00:20:10,620 --> 00:20:14,500 This is one of my favorite places to kick back after a quest. 380 00:20:14,500 --> 00:20:16,510 They have a great house ale. 381 00:20:16,510 --> 00:20:17,750 Wow,a cool tiger. 382 00:20:17,750 --> 00:20:20,180 Yeah,I've had him since level ten. 383 00:20:20,950 --> 00:20:23,140 His name is buttons. 384 00:20:23,140 --> 00:20:27,990 Anyway,if you had your own game character we could hang out, maybe go on a quest. 385 00:20:28,810 --> 00:20:30,930 Sounds interesting. 386 00:20:30,930 --> 00:20:32,200 So you'll think about it? 387 00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:35,180 Oh,I don't think I'll be able to stop thinking about it. 388 00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:38,680 Smooth. 389 00:20:40,620 --> 00:20:41,360 We're home. 390 00:20:41,360 --> 00:20:43,580 Oh,my god,what happened? 391 00:20:43,580 --> 00:20:49,240 Well,your ex-boyfriend sends his regards and I think the rest is fairly self-explanatory. 392 00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:50,840 I'm so sorry. 393 00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:54,120 I really thought if you guys went instead of me he wouldn't be such an ass. 394 00:20:54,120 --> 00:20:56,170 No,it was a valid hypothesis. 395 00:20:56,170 --> 00:20:59,180 That was a valid...? What is happening to you? 396 00:21:00,020 --> 00:21:03,210 Really... thank you so much for going and trying. 397 00:21:03,210 --> 00:21:06,020 You're so terrific. 398 00:21:06,670 --> 00:21:08,510 Really. 399 00:21:08,510 --> 00:21:12,210 Why don't you get some clothes on, I'll get my purse, and dinner is on me,okay? 400 00:21:12,210 --> 00:21:13,830 - Really? Great. - Thank you. 401 00:21:19,950 --> 00:21:22,150 You're not done with her,are you? 402 00:21:23,380 --> 00:21:26,120 Are babies will be smart and beautiful. 403 00:21:28,340 --> 00:21:31,000 Not to mention imaginary. 404 00:21:35,860 --> 00:21:38,030 - *with you,penny? - Sure. 405 00:21:38,030 --> 00:21:40,100 We can't have thai food- we had indian for lunch. 406 00:21:40,100 --> 00:21:41,000 So? 407 00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:42,590 They're both curry-based cuisines. 408 00:21:42,590 --> 00:21:43,510 So? 409 00:21:43,510 --> 00:21:45,560 It would be gastronomically redundant. 410 00:21:45,560 --> 00:21:48,640 I can see we're going to have to spell out everything for this girl. 411 00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:51,960 Any ideas,raj? 412 00:21:53,410 --> 00:21:55,900 Uh,turn left on lake street and head up to colorado. 413 00:21:55,900 --> 00:21:58,720 I know a wonderful little sushi bar that has karaoke. 414 00:21:58,720 --> 00:22:00,750 That sounds like fun. 415 00:22:01,130 --> 00:22:06,110 Baby,baby,don't get hooked on me 416 00:22:06,700 --> 00:22:12,530 oh,baby,baby,don't get hooked on me... 417 00:22:13,690 --> 00:22:15,610 I don't know what your odds are in the world as a whole, 418 00:22:15,610 --> 00:22:17,800 but as far as the population of this car goes, 419 00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:19,870 you're a veritable mack daddy. 420 00:22:19,870 --> 00:22:22,280 -=www.ydy.com/bbs=- proudly presents... THE BIG BANG THEOTY Season 01 Episode 01 421 00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:25,090 YTET-cflily -=www.ydy.com/bbs=- 422 00:22:26,305 --> 00:23:26,554 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org