1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:00,960 Previously on... 2 00:00:02,600 --> 00:00:03,080 Ladies. 3 00:00:03,080 --> 00:00:05,600 Renee was charmed by the new neighbor. 4 00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:07,080 Dibs. 5 00:00:07,120 --> 00:00:10,640 Trying to protect Gaby, Carlos committed murder. 6 00:00:10,840 --> 00:00:14,200 We are never gonna be able to tell anybody about this. 7 00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:15,920 Are you gonna be able to live with that? 8 00:00:15,920 --> 00:00:18,680 And the women swore to keep the secret. 9 00:00:19,200 --> 00:00:21,600 But then Bree received a warning. 10 00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:30,320 When I was alive, 11 00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:33,920 Bree Van De Kamp was one of my closest friends. 12 00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:38,600 Maybe that's because we had so much in common. 13 00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:43,360 Like Bree, I also received a menacing letter... 14 00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:47,200 One that threatened to shatter the perfect life 15 00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:49,400 I had worked so hard to create. 16 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:55,240 You see, I had once committed a desperate act of my own. 17 00:00:56,520 --> 00:00:59,760 And despite my best efforts to conceal it, 18 00:01:00,680 --> 00:01:04,760 someone found out and was determined to expose me. 19 00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:08,840 I thought about telling my friends. 20 00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:12,800 But I decided not to burden them. 21 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:17,760 I had hoped that with one final act, 22 00:01:17,760 --> 00:01:20,120 I could consign my deeds to history. 23 00:01:20,840 --> 00:01:23,240 But I had forgotten that history... 24 00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:26,680 has a way of repeating itself. 25 00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:32,320 Something interesting? 26 00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:37,800 No. No, just a... letter... 27 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:41,360 from a friend who I haven't, uh, heard from in a while. 28 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:43,240 You okay? 29 00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:44,440 I'm fine. 30 00:01:45,480 --> 00:01:47,000 I'm just annoyed 31 00:01:47,000 --> 00:01:51,240 because the, uh, postman left me Gaby's water bill again. 32 00:01:51,560 --> 00:01:54,000 You go in. I'll just put it back in the box. 33 00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:55,800 All right. 34 00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:12,760 Oh, Karen. 35 00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:15,280 You scared me. What are you doing out so late? 36 00:02:15,320 --> 00:02:18,120 What am I, a cat? I'm allowed to be out past 10:00. 37 00:02:18,120 --> 00:02:22,200 I'm sorry. Have you seen anyone near my mailbox? 38 00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:23,920 What's the problem? 39 00:02:24,880 --> 00:02:26,720 I just... got a letter. 40 00:02:28,120 --> 00:02:29,280 An obscene letter. 41 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:30,480 That's all? 42 00:02:30,640 --> 00:02:33,200 You oughta be happy that someone still finds you obscene. 43 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:36,400 Last week, I got called "Sir" three times. 44 00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:37,720 Karen! This is serious. 45 00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:40,240 I need to find out who put this letter in my mailbox. 46 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:42,920 Wow, you're really shaken up. 47 00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:44,600 Yes, I am. 48 00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:47,160 This is very upsetting, 49 00:02:47,160 --> 00:02:48,400 and I don't know what I'm going to do. 50 00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:51,720 It's just a note, Bree. Let it go. 51 00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:59,280 Yes, Bree Van De Kamp and I had so much in common. 52 00:02:59,920 --> 00:03:01,960 We shared similar lives. 53 00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,520 And now Bree found herself praying 54 00:03:06,240 --> 00:03:09,360 that we wouldn't share a similar fate. 55 00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:24,560 In the divided world of the suburbs, 56 00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:27,600 everyone is looking for a way to connect. 57 00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:31,800 They fend off loneliness with casual conversation. 58 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:36,480 They share old treasures with a young friend. 59 00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:41,880 They help a neighbor make a difficult move. 60 00:03:44,160 --> 00:03:46,360 But for Carlos and Gaby Solis, 61 00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:48,720 the only connection that mattered 62 00:03:48,880 --> 00:03:50,720 was the romantic one. 63 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:54,120 And when it came to maintaining it, 64 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:57,760 Gaby was willing to pull out all the stops. 65 00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:01,400 What are we celebrating? 66 00:04:01,560 --> 00:04:04,800 A new record. It's been 38 days since we last had sex, 67 00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:06,640 and that streak is ending tonight. 68 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:07,760 Seriously, it's been that long? 69 00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:10,080 38 days. 70 00:04:10,080 --> 00:04:12,040 That's like three years in hoo-hah time. 71 00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:14,200 Sweetie, I would love to, 72 00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:15,680 but I have way too much work to do. 73 00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:18,000 Unh-unh. No, no. No excuses. 74 00:04:18,160 --> 00:04:20,320 I changed the sheets, shaved my legs, 75 00:04:20,320 --> 00:04:22,000 and dumped the kids at McCluskey's, 76 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,120 so drop your pants, cowboy, and saddle up. 77 00:04:26,040 --> 00:04:27,080 Yes, ma'am. 78 00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:28,080 Oh! 79 00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:38,520 Don't feel bad. It happens to lots of men. 80 00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:42,120 Not to me. Not to us. 81 00:04:44,840 --> 00:04:46,360 Well, it has been 38 days. 82 00:04:46,360 --> 00:04:48,120 Maybe the poor little guy forgot what to do. 83 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:49,440 Not helping. 84 00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:50,320 Oh. 85 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:53,520 Listen, you've been under a lot of stress lately. 86 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:54,920 So relax. 87 00:04:55,400 --> 00:04:56,960 How about I give you a nice massage, 88 00:04:56,960 --> 00:04:59,520 we finish the champagne, and later we try again? 89 00:04:59,520 --> 00:05:01,600 Gaby, thanks, but it's not gonna work, okay? 90 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:15,520 Like Carlos, Susan Delfino was also feeling disconnected. 91 00:05:15,640 --> 00:05:20,000 Her guilt made the world a strange and scary place... 92 00:05:22,680 --> 00:05:26,120 where she could be exposed at any moment. 93 00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:28,960 Hey! Hold it right there! 94 00:05:30,920 --> 00:05:32,080 I know what you did. 95 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:33,360 What? 96 00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:35,360 Yeah, and you're not getting away with it. 97 00:05:35,560 --> 00:05:37,240 You thought you could walk out with a case of soda 98 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:38,400 and no one would notice? 99 00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:42,120 Oh. Uh... 100 00:05:42,640 --> 00:05:44,400 I-I forgot those were down there. 101 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:47,000 Yeah. Right. I've never heard that one before. 102 00:05:47,160 --> 00:05:48,960 Ma'am, I'm gonna ask you to step away from the cart 103 00:05:48,960 --> 00:05:50,520 and keep your hands where I can see 'em. 104 00:05:50,680 --> 00:05:51,920 Everything okay here? 105 00:05:51,920 --> 00:05:53,480 If you consider larceny okay. 106 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:55,400 Mrs. Delfino, 107 00:05:55,400 --> 00:05:59,000 on behalf of Fairview market, I'd like to apologize for Kevin. 108 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:00,560 Seems we're all paying the price 109 00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:02,680 for his rejection from the police academy. 110 00:06:02,680 --> 00:06:05,400 Oh, well, excuse me for not wanting to live in a world 111 00:06:05,400 --> 00:06:06,680 where people can commit crimes 112 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:08,280 without suffering the consequences. 113 00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:11,000 You are a criminal. 114 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:14,520 I've known Mrs. Delfino for years. 115 00:06:14,720 --> 00:06:17,400 She pays for the grapes she eats in the produce section. 116 00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:19,560 She would never do anything bad. 117 00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:21,720 Sure, I would. 118 00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:23,000 What? 119 00:06:23,720 --> 00:06:25,280 You don't know me at all. 120 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:28,600 I'm a very bad person. I did a horrible thing. 121 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:30,400 I deserve to be punished. 122 00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:33,320 Let me cuff her. I have cuffs. I brought 'em from home. 123 00:06:33,320 --> 00:06:34,640 No one's getting cuffed. 124 00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:37,120 Just... pay for the soda next time you come in. 125 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:39,720 No, no, no. No, you need to march me inside 126 00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:42,280 - and make me pay now. - Mrs. Delfino... 127 00:06:42,280 --> 00:06:43,440 I'm serious. 128 00:06:44,360 --> 00:06:48,160 Make an example of me to deter other criminals. 129 00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:53,080 - Fine. Take her in. - Copy that. 130 00:06:54,960 --> 00:06:58,400 Yep. Did the crime. Doing the time. 131 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:00,560 Dead man walking. 132 00:07:05,360 --> 00:07:06,440 So what's the damage? 133 00:07:06,440 --> 00:07:08,400 An arm and a leg? Just an arm? 134 00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:11,000 Not even a finger. It's a cracked fitting. 135 00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:12,440 I swapped it out. It's no charge. 136 00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:14,080 Really? The first guy I called 137 00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:15,640 said I had to re-pipe the whole house. 138 00:07:15,640 --> 00:07:16,960 Oh, it's a scam. 139 00:07:16,960 --> 00:07:18,680 These pipes are top-of-the-line copper. 140 00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:20,320 The guy that put 'em in did a great job. 141 00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:22,520 How do you know? It was me. 142 00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:25,680 You just saved me 10 grand. 143 00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:28,160 No wonder people say such good things about you. 144 00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:30,280 Well... 145 00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:32,040 What are neighbors for? 146 00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:33,760 Need anything else, just holler. 147 00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:36,560 Actually, there is one thing. 148 00:07:38,160 --> 00:07:39,560 I'm a real estate developer, 149 00:07:39,720 --> 00:07:41,600 about to break ground on a new project, 150 00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:43,480 and, uh, I'm looking for some help... 151 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,320 local guys that I can trust. 152 00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:46,960 You interested? 153 00:07:57,240 --> 00:07:59,360 Hey, Mike. Got a minute? 154 00:07:59,360 --> 00:08:00,960 Um... Hey, Renee. 155 00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:02,560 We're friends, right? 156 00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:04,000 Well... 157 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,000 Oh, come on. You fixed my toilet for free. 158 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,560 Um, that wasn't free. I sent you a bill. 159 00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:09,960 You just haven't paid it. 160 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:17,360 Ahh. Anyway, look, here's the deal. 161 00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:21,360 Uh, Ben likes me. He just doesn't know it yet. 162 00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:24,200 Now I need to find that thing that we connect on. 163 00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:27,480 You've been on the inside. What can you tell me about him? 164 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:30,960 Well, he's got copper pipes. 165 00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:32,520 Something personal. 166 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:35,760 I saw a box of cheerios... and a coffeemaker. 167 00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:37,880 He must like coffee. Unless it's for guests. 168 00:08:37,880 --> 00:08:40,360 Oh, my god. I got more out of the cable guy, 169 00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:41,440 and he's deaf. 170 00:08:41,440 --> 00:08:44,880 Does he have any photos? Artwork? Think, Delfino, think! 171 00:08:44,920 --> 00:08:45,560 Okay. 172 00:08:45,560 --> 00:08:47,160 Okay. Um... 173 00:08:47,680 --> 00:08:49,400 There was this plaque from the mayor... 174 00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:51,280 Something about his work with the elderly. 175 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:52,440 Really? 176 00:08:53,120 --> 00:08:54,560 He likes the elderly? 177 00:08:55,880 --> 00:08:57,320 Well, I like the elderly. 178 00:08:57,920 --> 00:08:59,080 Since when? 179 00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:01,400 Oh. Old people are adorable. 180 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:03,640 I love their little raisin faces 181 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:06,040 and those tennis balls they put on their walkers. 182 00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:08,240 Thanks for the tip... 183 00:09:08,880 --> 00:09:09,880 Friend. 184 00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:16,160 Mom! 185 00:09:16,160 --> 00:09:17,600 Hey, how was your day? 186 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:19,920 Awesome. Dad's hotel is so cool. 187 00:09:19,920 --> 00:09:21,840 We went swimming in the pool and played marco polo 188 00:09:21,840 --> 00:09:23,240 and cannonballed off the diving board. 189 00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:24,320 Why don't we have a pool? 190 00:09:24,320 --> 00:09:26,080 And then we got hamburgers and french fries 191 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:27,520 and super-sized cherry cola slushies. 192 00:09:27,520 --> 00:09:30,360 Ah. Sugar and caffeine. 193 00:09:30,360 --> 00:09:32,320 I guess you figured they were too young for meth? 194 00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:33,880 It's just a slushie. 195 00:09:33,880 --> 00:09:36,040 On a school night. She's gonna be up till 2:00 A.M. 196 00:09:36,040 --> 00:09:37,360 Just 'cause you couldn't say "No." 197 00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:38,840 You're blowing this out of proportion. 198 00:09:38,840 --> 00:09:40,280 Who wants to play mega monopoly? 199 00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:42,640 It's just like regular monopoly but with more stuff. 200 00:09:42,720 --> 00:09:44,400 You just keep playing and playing 201 00:09:44,400 --> 00:09:46,120 and playing and playing and playing... 202 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:48,120 Yeah. Way out of proportion. 203 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:50,920 Look, now that we're really separated, 204 00:09:50,920 --> 00:09:52,880 I refuse to be the bad guy all the time. 205 00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:54,560 You have got to learn to say "No." 206 00:09:54,560 --> 00:09:56,200 I say it. 207 00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:57,760 Tonight when we walked past the pet shop, 208 00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:00,120 they wanted a spider monkey. I said "No." 209 00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:02,720 I'm serious. Things are different now. 210 00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:04,600 I'm not gonna let this be the house of pain 211 00:10:04,600 --> 00:10:06,800 while you're living it up at the MTV beach house. 212 00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:08,520 You're right. 213 00:10:09,280 --> 00:10:10,720 Things are different now. 214 00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:13,880 For instance, I used to have to stand here and listen to this. 215 00:10:14,040 --> 00:10:17,080 But now I'm thinking... no. 216 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,440 Hey, look at that. I'm getting pretty good at this "No" thing. 217 00:10:32,920 --> 00:10:35,240 It's bad enough when we weren't even trying to have sex, 218 00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:36,520 but to try and fail? 219 00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:38,120 Well, do you think it might have something to do 220 00:10:38,120 --> 00:10:39,600 with the stress Carlos is under? 221 00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:41,800 We're all under stress. You know what's stressful? 222 00:10:41,800 --> 00:10:43,840 Is not having sex for 39 1/2 days. 223 00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:46,200 You're sounding a little callous. 224 00:10:46,720 --> 00:10:49,520 I don't mean to. It's just, sex is important to us. 225 00:10:49,520 --> 00:10:52,440 Even in our toughest times, it's what always held us together. 226 00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:55,280 If we don't have that, I'm worried what will happen to us. 227 00:10:55,440 --> 00:10:56,560 I get that. 228 00:10:56,840 --> 00:10:58,360 So... come on, girls. 229 00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:00,720 How can I spice things up in the bedroom? 230 00:11:02,480 --> 00:11:03,960 Is this actually happening? 231 00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:06,680 Gabrielle Solis is asking us for sex tips? 232 00:11:06,680 --> 00:11:08,720 I know! It's the apocalypse. 233 00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:10,880 Well, if you don't mind harsh lighting 234 00:11:10,880 --> 00:11:13,400 and blatant misogyny, you can always watch a porno. 235 00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:15,280 Watched one. Filmed one. Next. 236 00:11:15,560 --> 00:11:17,120 This may shock you, 237 00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:21,120 but sometimes Mike and I like doing it in public. 238 00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:23,080 Huh. Those of us who wandered 239 00:11:23,080 --> 00:11:25,320 by Santa's workshop at the Christmas carnival... 240 00:11:25,320 --> 00:11:26,520 Not that shocked. 241 00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:28,600 You could try role-playing. 242 00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:31,480 Once, I dressed up in a french maid's costume, 243 00:11:31,480 --> 00:11:33,560 and Orson pretended to be a stubborn stain, 244 00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:35,320 and why is everybody looking at me? 245 00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:38,200 Seriously, guys, I need some new moves. 246 00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:40,320 Well, there's this one mom at school... 247 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:41,720 and I promised I wouldn't use her name... 248 00:11:41,720 --> 00:11:44,320 Betty Cunningham... who hired a stripper to teach her 249 00:11:44,320 --> 00:11:46,120 how to give her husband a lap dance. 250 00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:47,640 Well, I don't know what a stripper could teach me, 251 00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:49,080 but it's worth a shot. 252 00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:50,840 You really think that's gonna work? 253 00:11:51,480 --> 00:11:52,600 Why wouldn't it? 254 00:11:54,440 --> 00:11:57,480 Because... I get where Carlos is coming from. 255 00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,960 This kind of guilt can really mess with your head. 256 00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:04,320 Something you wanna talk about? 257 00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:07,560 Okay, the other day, 258 00:12:07,600 --> 00:12:10,560 I accidentally took a case of soda from the supermarket, 259 00:12:10,560 --> 00:12:12,440 and the security guard started yelling at me. 260 00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:13,880 And at first, I was like, "No," 261 00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:16,400 but then I was like "Yes, I deserve it." 262 00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:18,160 "I deserve to be punished." 263 00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:21,120 It felt right to be publicly humiliated like that, 264 00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:22,840 and why is everybody looking at me? 265 00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:25,720 'Cause there's a bucket of crazy where your head used to be. 266 00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:28,800 So now I'm crazy. 267 00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:32,920 I thought you said I could talk to you about this stuff. 268 00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:33,800 You can, 269 00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:36,040 and we appreciate what you're grappling with, 270 00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:38,880 but you cannot go around attracting attention like that. 271 00:12:39,240 --> 00:12:40,440 It's not safe. 272 00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:41,520 Exactly. 273 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:44,120 So knock it off and go get me some more coffee! 274 00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:48,280 What? She likes to be yelled at. 275 00:12:52,120 --> 00:12:52,960 Hey, you. 276 00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:56,600 Uh, I thought you were, uh, at work. 277 00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:58,600 I pronounce the city of Fairview 278 00:12:58,600 --> 00:13:00,360 safe enough to have lunch with my girl. 279 00:13:01,760 --> 00:13:03,160 Oh, that would be lovely, 280 00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:06,000 but I have something I need to do. Shoot. 281 00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:09,040 Oh, yeah? Like what? 282 00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:11,160 What? 283 00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:14,120 Unless it's a... it's a big secret. 284 00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:18,080 Is it a big secret? 285 00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:20,640 Chuck. 286 00:13:22,280 --> 00:13:24,320 I'm sorry. You're right. I... 287 00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:27,880 You don't owe me any explanations. 288 00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:32,240 I just... I just need to know that we're okay. 289 00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:33,800 Chuck... 290 00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:36,880 My feelings for you have not changed, 291 00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:38,720 just my schedule for the day. 292 00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:39,800 Mwah. 293 00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:41,320 Well, that's good, 294 00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:43,520 because suspicion can be a great trait in police work, 295 00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:45,280 but it's horrible in a relationship. 296 00:13:45,680 --> 00:13:47,120 Just ask my ex. 297 00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:49,800 I never wanna be that guy again. 298 00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:12,080 Hello there, Karen. 299 00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:13,280 "Karen"? 300 00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:16,280 What happened to "Liver spot" or "6 feet under" 301 00:14:16,280 --> 00:14:18,280 or one of your other cute nicknames? 302 00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:20,200 No, no, I can't come in! 303 00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:23,240 I'm just dropping off another home-cooked meal! 304 00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:26,200 What meal? What the hell are you yelling for? 305 00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:27,840 Just lift the napkin. 306 00:14:29,120 --> 00:14:31,360 50 bucks. What's the catch? 307 00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:34,040 Don't look now, but do you see Ben over there? 308 00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:39,120 Mm. Subtle. 309 00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:41,600 Anyway, he has a soft spot for old people, 310 00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:44,480 and as far as he knows, so do I. 311 00:14:45,320 --> 00:14:48,360 No, no, your crinkled little smile 312 00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:50,280 is thanks enough for me. 313 00:14:51,040 --> 00:14:52,240 Are you petting me? 314 00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:55,200 Just say nice things about me to Ben. 315 00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:57,360 Tell him I bring you meals, that kind of stuff. 316 00:14:57,680 --> 00:15:00,120 Well, it's a pretty big favor for 50 bucks. 317 00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:03,800 Considering I don't like you, I'll do it for $100. 318 00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:04,680 Fine. 319 00:15:04,680 --> 00:15:07,400 Tomorrow I'll bring you a c-note and a jell-o mold. Deal? 320 00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:08,600 Oh, Renee. 321 00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:10,400 Bless your heart. You're so good to me. 322 00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:12,920 No, you're the one who enriches my life. 323 00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:15,000 The joy I get... 324 00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:16,640 Hands off. He's gone. 325 00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:22,360 Oh, my god. 326 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:25,160 You think I sent this? 327 00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:28,240 You have any idea how this makes me feel? 328 00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:30,080 Forgive me. I didn't think it was possible 329 00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:31,960 to damage the self-esteem of a murderer. 330 00:15:31,960 --> 00:15:33,520 A confessed murderer. 331 00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:36,480 And this-this is the only way you can see me? 332 00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:39,000 Paul! Paul. 333 00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:43,360 Please. 334 00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:51,280 I'm sorry. I've just been so panicked since I got it. 335 00:15:51,280 --> 00:15:54,440 It has the exact same wording as the letter Mary Alice received. 336 00:15:55,520 --> 00:15:56,280 Yes. 337 00:15:57,440 --> 00:15:58,640 That's very weird. 338 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:03,240 But why are you so worked up about it? 339 00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:06,000 I believe Mary Alice got a little worked up 340 00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:07,040 when she got hers. 341 00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:09,800 But she was hiding something. You aren't. 342 00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:13,160 Right? 343 00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:15,160 Of course not. 344 00:16:16,160 --> 00:16:18,280 It's obviously just a cruel prank, 345 00:16:18,280 --> 00:16:20,120 but I still wanna know who's responsible. 346 00:16:21,120 --> 00:16:23,920 It had to be someone who knew about the original note. 347 00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:27,880 Well, let's see. Obviously there's Martha Huber. 348 00:16:28,360 --> 00:16:30,000 Obviously she didn't send it. 349 00:16:30,040 --> 00:16:31,160 Then there's you, 350 00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:32,960 Susan, Lynette, Gaby. 351 00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:35,160 I assume you've already asked them. 352 00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:40,560 Uh, actually, I-I haven't mentioned it to the girls yet. 353 00:16:41,360 --> 00:16:43,880 I-I still haven't figured out exactly what it is. 354 00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:45,640 Well, whatever it is, 355 00:16:46,280 --> 00:16:47,800 don't keep it to yourself. 356 00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:51,600 If Mary Alice had shared her note with you girls... 357 00:16:53,720 --> 00:16:55,200 things might have turned out... 358 00:16:55,680 --> 00:16:56,960 a whole different way. 359 00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:10,280 You know it's recycling day. 360 00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:11,160 So? 361 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:12,440 So it looks like you're about 362 00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:14,440 to put kitchen garbage in your recycling bin. 363 00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:17,320 Oh. I hope I don't get punished. 364 00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:27,200 Oh, here I am, dropping a turkey carcass 365 00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:28,240 in with the recycling. 366 00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:30,520 And here I am, not giving a crap. 367 00:17:36,720 --> 00:17:38,880 Uh-oh. You got me. 368 00:17:40,080 --> 00:17:41,080 Can I bum one? 369 00:17:41,320 --> 00:17:42,960 My old lady made me quit. 370 00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:47,280 17... 371 00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:49,480 18... 372 00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:51,960 19... 373 00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:54,880 Thank god. Those were from last week. 374 00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:06,040 Hello. Uh, Ben, isn't it? 375 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:07,600 Yes. 376 00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:09,680 Uh, listen, uh, 377 00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,040 I was just talking to Mrs. McCluskey, 378 00:18:12,040 --> 00:18:15,360 and I gotta say, I really misjudged you. 379 00:18:15,560 --> 00:18:17,040 - Oh? - Yeah. 380 00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:19,480 She was telling me all the ways you've helped her. 381 00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:21,960 Well, I like to think I'm doing god's work, 382 00:18:22,120 --> 00:18:25,640 you know, until he takes her in her sleep or what have you. 383 00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:27,720 Yeah, I don't know if you knew this, 384 00:18:27,720 --> 00:18:30,200 but I'm quite involved with seniors myself. 385 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:34,840 Get out! Look at us, having things in common. 386 00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:35,840 Yeah. 387 00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:40,880 So is there something else I can help you with? 388 00:18:41,560 --> 00:18:44,880 Actually, yes. Are you free tonight? 389 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:49,920 Hey, buddy. 390 00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:51,120 What are you thinking for dinner tonight? 391 00:18:51,120 --> 00:18:52,600 Mexican? Chinese? 392 00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:54,440 Actually, there's a party at Rich Cohen's 393 00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:55,400 I was hoping to go to. 394 00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:57,400 Yeah? Don't hope too hard. 395 00:18:57,440 --> 00:18:58,360 Why not? 396 00:18:58,760 --> 00:19:00,640 Remember when Rich turned 13? 397 00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:03,440 It was the only bar mitzvah ever shut down by the police. 398 00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:04,880 I don't trust his parents. 399 00:19:04,880 --> 00:19:06,960 Well, if you makes you feel better, they're out of town. 400 00:19:06,960 --> 00:19:09,720 Ooh, an unsupervised party? Even better. 401 00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:10,360 We're just gonna be 402 00:19:10,360 --> 00:19:12,240 eating pizza and watching movies and stuff, 403 00:19:12,240 --> 00:19:13,960 and Rich's older brother will be there. 404 00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:16,560 Perfect. Someone to buy the beer. 405 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:20,280 So you're saying "No"? Again? 406 00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:22,040 Uh... 407 00:19:26,280 --> 00:19:29,400 I'm not saying no. I'm saying ask your dad. 408 00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:31,680 Hey! I'm just dropping off a check. 409 00:19:31,680 --> 00:19:34,080 Hang on a sec. Parker has something he wants to ask you. 410 00:19:35,560 --> 00:19:36,440 Parker. 411 00:19:37,040 --> 00:19:39,040 Can I go to a party at Rich Cohen's house tonight? 412 00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:40,440 What did your mom say? 413 00:19:40,840 --> 00:19:43,000 His mom said he should ask his dad. 414 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:48,000 Oh. Well... H-his parents are gonna be there, right? 415 00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:49,520 Nope. No parents. 416 00:19:52,160 --> 00:19:54,240 And... Rich Cohen... 417 00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:56,040 didn't something happen at his bar mitzvah? 418 00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:58,760 Lots of things happened... drinking, pot smoking, 419 00:19:58,760 --> 00:19:59,920 the whittaker girl got pregnant. 420 00:19:59,920 --> 00:20:02,400 It sounds like you already made up your mind here. 421 00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:03,920 No, no, no. 422 00:20:03,920 --> 00:20:07,320 I have not made up my mind. It is entirely up to you. 423 00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:10,400 You hear that, dad? Entirely up to you. 424 00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:15,200 Well... I-it seems like your mom doesn't think 425 00:20:15,200 --> 00:20:16,120 this is a good idea... 426 00:20:16,120 --> 00:20:17,280 I didn't say that. 427 00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:18,760 I don't not think it's a good idea. 428 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:21,320 Oh, so you do do think it's a good idea. 429 00:20:21,320 --> 00:20:24,880 I don't not think it's not... not... a good idea. 430 00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:26,040 Okay, I'm confused. 431 00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:27,080 Well, if your mom's not saying "No," 432 00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:28,280 I'm not saying "No" either. 433 00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:29,840 Oh! Well, if your dad's not saying "No," 434 00:20:29,840 --> 00:20:31,440 I'm sure as hell not going to say "No." 435 00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:32,800 So is that a "Yes"? 436 00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:35,280 Well... it's not a "No." 437 00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:36,520 Sweet. 438 00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:45,240 Are you sure this thing is safe? 439 00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:47,600 My son plays fireman on mine all the time. 440 00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:48,880 Do you wanna see a picture? 441 00:20:49,320 --> 00:20:51,120 Let's not make this sadder than it is. 442 00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:54,200 All right, so my husband's having a little problem In the bedroom. 443 00:20:54,240 --> 00:20:55,320 With his wiener? 444 00:20:55,480 --> 00:20:57,280 Yes, with his... wiener. 445 00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:00,120 Well, you can relax, because I'm like a doctor, 446 00:21:00,120 --> 00:21:02,800 and I see this problem all the time with older women. 447 00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:05,160 "Older"? Excuse me. 448 00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:06,760 I don't think our ages are that far apart. 449 00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:07,640 When were you born? 450 00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:08,880 1992. 451 00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:10,840 Me, too. All right, enough chitchat. 452 00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:12,480 Give me a taste of what I'm gonna learn here. 453 00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:22,280 Okay. I'd do ya. 454 00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:23,600 Let me try. 455 00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:25,160 That was kind of advanced. 456 00:21:25,160 --> 00:21:28,080 I was thinking maybe we could start with something simple, 457 00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:29,520 Like grinding on a chair. 458 00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:31,640 Okay, will you stop treating me like a grandma? 459 00:21:31,680 --> 00:21:34,480 I do yoga and zumba and kickboxing. 460 00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:35,960 I'm in excellent shape. 461 00:21:37,320 --> 00:21:38,240 Okay. 462 00:21:41,160 --> 00:21:41,720 Not bad. 463 00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:43,800 Okay, now ass up, legs out, 464 00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:47,400 and remember, slow is sexy. 465 00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:50,120 Oh, my god. 466 00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:54,240 Okay. Uh... A little harder than it looks. 467 00:21:54,360 --> 00:21:55,920 No worries. You'll pick it up in no time. 468 00:21:55,920 --> 00:21:57,120 Six months tops. 469 00:21:57,320 --> 00:21:59,480 What?! I can't wait that long. 470 00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:01,640 I need your moves, your body... 471 00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:04,960 My ass, but basically I need to be you by tonight. 472 00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:08,560 Hey, what are you doing tonight? 473 00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:10,240 I'm headlining at Double D's. 474 00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:12,400 If I triple your pay, 475 00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:14,320 would you mind being the opening act here? 476 00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:21,080 Ben, I don't know how the food is, 477 00:22:21,080 --> 00:22:23,000 but I already love this restaurant. 478 00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:24,720 We are the youngest people here. 479 00:22:25,120 --> 00:22:26,920 Oh, this isn't a restaurant. 480 00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:31,680 This is the senior center. 481 00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:34,240 Welcome to the Ben Faulkner function room. 482 00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:37,800 We're not eating here, are we? 483 00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:39,200 No, no, we're serving. 484 00:22:40,360 --> 00:22:43,400 We can eat afterwards if there are, you know, leftovers. 485 00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:45,000 Oh, fun. 486 00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:48,880 Uh, but I'm... I'm a little underdressed. 487 00:22:50,680 --> 00:22:51,680 There you go. 488 00:22:52,960 --> 00:22:54,240 There. Now you're perfect. 489 00:22:57,760 --> 00:22:59,880 Gaby, F.Y.I., guys who used to be blind 490 00:22:59,880 --> 00:23:01,360 don't enjoy reliving it. 491 00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:03,120 Relax. You're gonna love this. 492 00:23:03,760 --> 00:23:05,240 Now just sit back 493 00:23:05,400 --> 00:23:07,200 and get ready for takeoff. 494 00:23:16,640 --> 00:23:17,600 Yeah. 495 00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:21,040 Wow. You've been working out. 496 00:23:21,560 --> 00:23:24,240 I have... but that's not my ass. 497 00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:26,400 It's a professional's. 498 00:23:26,840 --> 00:23:28,520 Meet Dakota. 499 00:23:28,520 --> 00:23:30,640 What the hell? What is this? 500 00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:33,840 A gift from your wife. I work at Double D's, 501 00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:35,320 out by the interstate. 502 00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:38,120 Not the one by the airport that had the hepatitis scare. 503 00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:40,360 You hired a stripper. 504 00:23:40,760 --> 00:23:42,480 Only as a warm-up act. 505 00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:44,240 Then later on, she'll clear out, 506 00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:46,760 and it's just you and me for the main event. 507 00:23:46,960 --> 00:23:48,520 Nope. Not doing this. 508 00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:51,160 Hang on. Idea. Sit down. 509 00:23:53,160 --> 00:23:54,840 Oh! Okay. What are you doing? 510 00:23:54,840 --> 00:23:55,800 I don't... 511 00:23:56,360 --> 00:23:57,400 Oh, my god. He's right. 512 00:23:57,400 --> 00:23:59,400 Your body... it's like a dolphin. 513 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:00,440 Give it a little spank. 514 00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:01,840 Nothing will fix his problem quicker 515 00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:03,720 than a little girl-on-girl action. 516 00:24:04,360 --> 00:24:05,320 My "problem." 517 00:24:06,680 --> 00:24:07,760 You told her. 518 00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:09,440 Okay, quick. Make out with me. 519 00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:12,840 Do you have any idea how embarrassing this is for me? 520 00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:15,160 Thank you, doctor. You can go now. 521 00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:20,880 How could you do that to me? 522 00:24:21,120 --> 00:24:22,960 Try to get our sex life back on track? 523 00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:24,360 Carlos, even at our worst, 524 00:24:24,360 --> 00:24:26,400 this is the one thing that's always worked for us. 525 00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:28,520 I just want us to get back to normal. 526 00:24:28,520 --> 00:24:30,440 We're never going back to normal! 527 00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:32,080 Don't you understand that?! 528 00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:34,960 What I did... 529 00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:38,600 you can't wish it away. 530 00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:41,280 It is with me all the time, 531 00:24:42,120 --> 00:24:43,360 whether I'm awake 532 00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:44,960 or asleep... 533 00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:50,920 or trying to make love to you. 534 00:24:52,800 --> 00:24:55,160 I'm sorry. I just wish there was something I could do. 535 00:24:58,280 --> 00:24:59,240 There's not. 536 00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:10,520 What's that? 537 00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:12,800 I don't know. 538 00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:14,760 Is it good? 539 00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:16,760 Let me clue you in on something. 540 00:25:16,760 --> 00:25:20,040 Food is usually either good or free. 541 00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:23,880 How come you're dressed so fancy? 542 00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:26,920 Because I'm on a date with that hot Aussie over there. 543 00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:30,640 He just failed to mention what the date was. 544 00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:34,560 Ben brought you to sling food dressed like that? 545 00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:37,560 Honey, I think he's messing with you. 546 00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:49,360 I hope you had a good laugh. 547 00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:51,640 Be thankful I shoved that on your head. 548 00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:53,200 There was another option. 549 00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:00,000 Renee, stop. 550 00:26:00,560 --> 00:26:02,760 Why? So you can mock me some more? 551 00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:04,240 I wasn't mocking you. 552 00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:07,760 Okay, but I mean, you did kinda deserve it... 553 00:26:07,880 --> 00:26:10,880 I mean, your whole "I heart old people" thing. 554 00:26:11,560 --> 00:26:13,640 I was trying to find something we had in common, 555 00:26:14,000 --> 00:26:16,120 and now I know we have nothing in common. 556 00:26:17,120 --> 00:26:19,200 You're a good person who does things like this, 557 00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:21,920 and... I'm me. 558 00:26:22,480 --> 00:26:23,720 You're not a good person? 559 00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:25,240 No, Ben, I'm not. 560 00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:29,960 Because truthfully, doing charity makes me nauseous. 561 00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:31,080 Yeah, me, too. 562 00:26:31,720 --> 00:26:32,320 What? 563 00:26:32,320 --> 00:26:35,800 Makes me uncomfortable, too, but I know why that is. 564 00:26:36,360 --> 00:26:37,200 Do you? 565 00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:40,160 I don't want to talk about this. 566 00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:42,560 Why? You afraid of saying something truthful? 567 00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:50,160 When my mom... died, 568 00:26:50,520 --> 00:26:53,280 I was bounced around from relative to relative, 569 00:26:53,480 --> 00:26:54,440 most of them dirt-poor. 570 00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:58,320 We were on the receiving end of a lot of charity. 571 00:26:58,440 --> 00:27:00,640 I spent plenty of time in places like this. 572 00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:03,680 And I hated it. 573 00:27:04,360 --> 00:27:05,160 They hand you something... 574 00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:08,360 a, uh, a dented can of food or an ugly shirt. 575 00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:11,640 And someone tells you, "Say 'thank you' to the nice lady." 576 00:27:11,640 --> 00:27:15,480 And you do, but secretly, you wanna scream, "I hate you." 577 00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:20,440 I know what it's like to claw your way out of something. 578 00:27:22,920 --> 00:27:23,880 Look at us... 579 00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:28,120 having things in common. 580 00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:45,760 It's about time. 581 00:27:49,640 --> 00:27:50,960 Is there a problem, officer? 582 00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:52,640 Yeah. You're parked in a fire zone. 583 00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:56,280 Oh! Darn the luck, I am. 584 00:27:57,240 --> 00:27:59,360 Well, sounds like somebody's gonna be slapped 585 00:27:59,360 --> 00:28:00,880 with a pretty steep fine. 586 00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:02,280 Yeah, I should write you a ticket. 587 00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:06,600 But if you promise not to do it again, 588 00:28:06,800 --> 00:28:08,080 I'll let you off with a warning. 589 00:28:08,200 --> 00:28:10,120 What? Why would you do that? 590 00:28:10,640 --> 00:28:13,240 - 'Cause I'm a new dad. - Oh, jeez. 591 00:28:13,440 --> 00:28:16,800 Abigail Dorothy Brovka, 8 pounds, 6 ounces. 592 00:28:17,040 --> 00:28:18,160 I'm just so happy, 593 00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:19,240 filled with love. 594 00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:21,040 Anything short of a triple murder, 595 00:28:21,040 --> 00:28:23,200 and I'm pretty much looking the other way. 596 00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:25,600 No, no. No, don't look the other way. 597 00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:27,200 No, look this way. 598 00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:30,240 Laws have been broken. There must be consequences. 599 00:28:30,360 --> 00:28:32,000 I just wanna get home to my baby. 600 00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:34,200 I mean, look at her, all wrapped up 601 00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:36,040 like the tastiest little burrito in Fairview. 602 00:28:36,040 --> 00:28:38,240 - Oh, look at that. - Yeah. 603 00:28:39,560 --> 00:28:40,880 Ah, well... 604 00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:42,720 That was not cool. 605 00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:46,120 Now fortunately for you, I always carry a backup. 606 00:28:46,600 --> 00:28:47,440 Are you kidding me? 607 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:49,680 What do I have to do to get arrested here? 608 00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:52,120 Lady, people like you used to drive me nuts. 609 00:28:52,520 --> 00:28:54,880 But nothing can faze me now that this sweet little girl's 610 00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:55,880 come into my life. 611 00:28:55,880 --> 00:28:59,960 Well, that sweet little girl... she's got dumbo ears. 612 00:29:04,880 --> 00:29:05,960 Ma'am, you can turn around 613 00:29:05,960 --> 00:29:07,160 and put your hands behind your back. 614 00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:09,440 You have the right to remain silent. 615 00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:11,680 Anything you say can and will be used against you 616 00:29:11,680 --> 00:29:12,880 in a court of law. 617 00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:16,120 Hey, Mike. 618 00:29:16,840 --> 00:29:19,800 Um, I, uh, I've got a bit of a problem. 619 00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:21,800 Maybe you can help me out with it. 620 00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:24,000 I can try. What's the problem? 621 00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:25,240 You. 622 00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:30,440 How am I supposed to hire you when I can't get you bonded? 623 00:29:31,120 --> 00:29:34,120 Who knew? Mike Delfino, suburban dad, 624 00:29:34,120 --> 00:29:36,960 guy who keeps the neatest lawn on the block, 625 00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:39,000 Ex con? 626 00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:41,320 Yep. 627 00:29:41,600 --> 00:29:43,640 And you were gonna mention this when? 628 00:29:44,040 --> 00:29:46,280 Look, I'm sorry. It's not something I tend to lead with 629 00:29:46,280 --> 00:29:47,560 when I meet somebody. 630 00:29:47,720 --> 00:29:49,600 'cause you're not that guy anymore. 631 00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:50,880 That's right. 632 00:29:52,200 --> 00:29:55,080 A bad cop tried to rape your girlfriend, 633 00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:57,680 and you fought him to protect her. 634 00:29:58,240 --> 00:30:00,680 Tell me why you wouldn't wanna be that guy anymore. 635 00:30:00,760 --> 00:30:02,400 It was a long time ago. 636 00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:03,960 I was a kid, 637 00:30:03,960 --> 00:30:06,760 and I've learned life's a lot more complicated than I thought. 638 00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:08,760 Nah. Nah. 639 00:30:08,920 --> 00:30:11,480 Life is brutally simple. 640 00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:15,320 Life is getting what you want and protecting who you love... 641 00:30:16,760 --> 00:30:18,320 and everything else is weakness. 642 00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:20,200 A guy like you... 643 00:30:21,040 --> 00:30:22,320 guy like you knows it. 644 00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:26,280 Ben, if this is all just to tell me you can't use me, 645 00:30:26,280 --> 00:30:27,240 I understand. 646 00:30:27,240 --> 00:30:28,800 No, no, no, no, I didn't say that. 647 00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:30,200 I said I couldn't bond you. 648 00:30:32,920 --> 00:30:34,280 I can definitely use you. 649 00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:38,840 I hope you've cooled off a bit. 650 00:30:39,240 --> 00:30:43,000 Yeah. Well, uh, spending a few hours in a cell 651 00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:45,320 with a drunk transvestite will do that to you. 652 00:30:47,320 --> 00:30:49,000 Your baby's cute, by the way. 653 00:30:50,520 --> 00:30:52,400 I swear she'll grow into those ears. 654 00:30:52,560 --> 00:30:55,400 Thanks. The guy you called to pick you up is here. 655 00:31:03,040 --> 00:31:04,720 Carlos, thanks for coming. 656 00:31:05,280 --> 00:31:07,160 I couldn't call Mike, and, uh, 657 00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:08,680 I didn't wanna upset the girls, so... 658 00:31:08,680 --> 00:31:09,520 You okay? 659 00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:12,480 They told me you assaulted a motorcycle cop. 660 00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:15,640 Actually, it was just a motorcycle. 661 00:31:17,520 --> 00:31:18,760 That doesn't sound like you. 662 00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:20,920 I've been... 663 00:31:22,120 --> 00:31:24,360 in this weird place lately. 664 00:31:26,280 --> 00:31:30,080 I keep doing things, hoping to get caught. 665 00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:31,480 Does it help? 666 00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:33,720 For five minutes. 667 00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:37,760 And then I just feel guilty again. 668 00:31:41,520 --> 00:31:44,360 I just don't know how to pull myself out of this. 669 00:31:45,880 --> 00:31:46,760 I get it. 670 00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:51,080 Gaby keeps pushing me to act like everything is normal. 671 00:31:51,760 --> 00:31:54,040 I guess we're just supposed to stuff everything down 672 00:31:54,040 --> 00:31:55,040 and move on. 673 00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:56,640 But that's impossible. 674 00:31:57,320 --> 00:31:59,840 The girls are playing poker 675 00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:04,000 and acting like things are fine, and they're not. 676 00:32:13,160 --> 00:32:15,280 It is nice to be able to talk about this. 677 00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:16,280 Ohh. 678 00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:18,440 It is. 679 00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:23,080 Do you wanna get some coffee? 680 00:32:26,160 --> 00:32:27,160 Sounds good. 681 00:32:44,880 --> 00:32:46,400 Parker, it's me. 682 00:32:46,400 --> 00:32:48,400 It's getting late. Is everything okay? 683 00:32:48,720 --> 00:32:51,160 Everything is fine, m'lady. 684 00:32:51,920 --> 00:32:53,000 Who's this? 685 00:32:53,080 --> 00:32:53,880 Toph. 686 00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:56,520 If this is a booty call, Toph is ready to fill in. 687 00:32:57,920 --> 00:32:59,560 Where is Parker? 688 00:32:59,800 --> 00:33:00,920 I don't know, man. 689 00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:01,880 It's kind of 690 00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:03,800 a "Lord of the flies" situation here. 691 00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:06,800 So... are we hooking up or what? 692 00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:08,520 Oh! 693 00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:12,080 Parker! 694 00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:14,920 Parker! 695 00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:17,600 Excuse me, excuse me. I'm looking for my son, 696 00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:19,520 Parker Scavo... I'm hoping you know him. 697 00:33:19,520 --> 00:33:23,000 Keg stand! Keg stand! Keg stand! Keg stand! 698 00:33:23,080 --> 00:33:24,640 And now I'm hoping you don't. 699 00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:27,800 Keg stand! Keg stand! Keg stand! Keg stand! 700 00:33:27,800 --> 00:33:29,680 Whoa, hold on. This is a private party. 701 00:33:29,680 --> 00:33:31,080 Uh, I'll just be a minute. 702 00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:33,080 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you, some kind of narc? 703 00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:36,120 No, I'm just looking for my son, I swear. I'm not a narc. 704 00:33:36,120 --> 00:33:38,240 Exactly what a narc would say. 705 00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:39,520 Step aside, kid. 706 00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:41,640 Lady, I said no. 707 00:33:42,280 --> 00:33:45,080 Listen to me. My son is here somewhere, 708 00:33:45,080 --> 00:33:47,320 and he is probably drunk and probably terrified, 709 00:33:47,320 --> 00:33:48,680 and I have got to find him. 710 00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:51,960 Sorry. There's no way we're letting a narc into our party. 711 00:33:52,040 --> 00:33:53,560 I am not... Ugh! 712 00:33:58,480 --> 00:33:59,200 Okay. 713 00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:01,280 Would a narc do this? 714 00:34:04,080 --> 00:34:04,880 Legs! 715 00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:10,520 Keg stand! Keg stand! Keg stand! Keg stand! Keg stand! 716 00:34:11,240 --> 00:34:12,320 Lynette? 717 00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:14,160 Uh... Tom! 718 00:34:16,520 --> 00:34:19,120 This isn't what it looks like. I haven't been drinking. 719 00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:23,000 I mean, a little. What are you doing here? 720 00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:24,240 Parker called me to pick him up 721 00:34:24,240 --> 00:34:26,240 - because he drank too much. - Where is he? 722 00:34:26,240 --> 00:34:28,760 He's in the car. He sent me back because he lost his phone. 723 00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:29,760 Is he okay? 724 00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:32,600 He's covered in puke, which I'm hoping is-is his. 725 00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:33,760 Oh, god. 726 00:34:34,240 --> 00:34:37,360 This is your fault for letting him come here. 727 00:34:37,760 --> 00:34:39,880 My fault? You could have stopped him. 728 00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:41,880 Oh, please. You knew it was a bad idea. 729 00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:43,560 You were just too busy testing me. 730 00:34:43,560 --> 00:34:47,240 No, I was giving you a chance to stand up and be a father. 731 00:34:47,240 --> 00:34:48,840 Now we've got a 16-year-old son 732 00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:50,200 we have to clean off with a garden hose. 733 00:34:50,200 --> 00:34:51,760 I guess you showed me. 734 00:35:03,040 --> 00:35:04,000 He asleep? 735 00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:06,280 Yeah. I thought 736 00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:08,840 let him sober up before we punish him. 737 00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:12,440 I know I shouldn't have let him go tonight. 738 00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:16,680 But right now saying "Yes" 739 00:35:16,680 --> 00:35:19,440 is the only move I've got. 740 00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:21,200 "Move"? 741 00:35:21,960 --> 00:35:23,000 What is this? 742 00:35:23,400 --> 00:35:25,520 Some kind of game you're trying to win? 743 00:35:26,000 --> 00:35:28,840 Lynette, you have no idea what this is like for me. 744 00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:33,200 For 20 years, I had the same bedtime ritual. 745 00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:36,760 I-I brushed my teeth, and I'd go look at each kid sleeping, 746 00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:39,520 and no matter what crap happened during the day, 747 00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:42,400 I knew the things that mattered were okay. 748 00:35:44,440 --> 00:35:45,440 Now my ritual... 749 00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:47,680 I brush my teeth. 750 00:35:47,920 --> 00:35:49,440 So, yes. 751 00:35:50,960 --> 00:35:52,640 I'm doing everything I can to make the little time 752 00:35:52,640 --> 00:35:54,800 that I spend with them the best part of their week. 753 00:35:55,440 --> 00:35:57,120 Wow. You're succeeding. 754 00:35:57,320 --> 00:36:00,040 When I see them sprint out to the car, 755 00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:02,080 so excited to see daddy, 756 00:36:02,400 --> 00:36:04,360 part of me thinks, great. 757 00:36:04,760 --> 00:36:07,040 They're okay with this, and part of me thinks... 758 00:36:09,880 --> 00:36:11,160 oh, crap. 759 00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:13,960 I'm losing them to you. 760 00:36:16,280 --> 00:36:17,600 So you're trying to win, too. 761 00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:18,480 No. 762 00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:25,200 I just... 763 00:36:26,640 --> 00:36:28,680 I understand how you feel. 764 00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:34,320 And the only way we're gonna get through this 765 00:36:34,320 --> 00:36:37,160 Is if we stop worrying about... 766 00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:40,840 who wins. 767 00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:51,480 I'm sorry to burden you with this, 768 00:36:51,480 --> 00:36:53,800 but I just couldn't keep it to myself anymore. 769 00:36:54,040 --> 00:36:56,240 Why not? Why did you have to tell me? 770 00:36:56,400 --> 00:36:58,280 Repression is, like, your thing. 771 00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:00,840 Okay, let's-let's say someone knows. 772 00:37:00,840 --> 00:37:02,200 They're not asking us for money. 773 00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:03,760 They're not trying to blackmail us. 774 00:37:03,920 --> 00:37:05,360 I say until they tell us what they want, 775 00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:07,960 we just act like everything's normal. 776 00:37:08,720 --> 00:37:10,120 Except I'm drinking a lot more. 777 00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:12,520 You don't think we should tell the others? 778 00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:14,840 Well, we can't tell Susan. She's already flipping out. 779 00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:16,080 You're right. And we shouldn't tell Lynette, 780 00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:17,640 given what's going on in her marriage. 781 00:37:17,640 --> 00:37:19,560 Or Carlos, given what's going on in mine. 782 00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:23,720 So you don't think we should do anything? 783 00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:27,440 Well, there is one thing I've been telling you 784 00:37:27,440 --> 00:37:30,120 you need to do. Get rid of Chuck! 785 00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:32,400 You're right. I should, but, um... 786 00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:33,440 But what? 787 00:37:33,560 --> 00:37:35,120 This is gonna sound strange. 788 00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:38,760 He makes me feel safe. 789 00:37:39,080 --> 00:37:41,440 Safe? Yeah, I do think that's strange, 790 00:37:41,440 --> 00:37:43,360 especially now that some lunatic knows. 791 00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:46,040 But you've got to end this, and you've got to end it now. 792 00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:50,480 Chuck? 793 00:37:55,440 --> 00:37:56,720 Now isn't that funny? 794 00:37:57,440 --> 00:37:59,120 I was just thinking to myself, 795 00:37:59,120 --> 00:38:01,440 "How am I gonna wash my back in the shower?" 796 00:38:02,320 --> 00:38:03,520 And then you walk in. 797 00:38:03,840 --> 00:38:04,960 Serendipity, huh? 798 00:38:06,600 --> 00:38:09,200 Sorry. I'm gonna pass. 799 00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:12,320 Okay. 800 00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:15,520 Is, um... 801 00:38:17,040 --> 00:38:18,240 something on your mind? 802 00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:19,920 It can wait. 803 00:38:21,840 --> 00:38:23,560 - Bree... - Go ahead. Take your shower. 804 00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:54,080 Hello? 805 00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:55,120 I have a collect call 806 00:38:55,120 --> 00:38:57,000 from Fairview correctional institution. 807 00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:58,320 Will you accept the charges? 808 00:38:58,760 --> 00:38:59,520 Yes. 809 00:39:01,400 --> 00:39:03,120 Bree, it's Paul Young. 810 00:39:04,120 --> 00:39:05,800 I've been thinking about what you asked me... 811 00:39:06,320 --> 00:39:08,720 You know, who might have known about Mary Alice's note. 812 00:39:09,040 --> 00:39:09,800 Yeah? 813 00:39:10,200 --> 00:39:12,360 When I confessed to the murder of Martha Huber, 814 00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:14,200 I mentioned the letter to the police. 815 00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:19,400 Well, do you remember who these policemen were? 816 00:39:19,480 --> 00:39:21,200 The main detective was a tall guy 817 00:39:21,280 --> 00:39:24,360 with a short name like, uh, Pence or Vince. 818 00:39:25,960 --> 00:39:28,080 Was it Vance? Chuck Vance? 819 00:39:28,200 --> 00:39:29,720 Yes, that's it. 820 00:39:30,880 --> 00:39:31,840 I have to go. 821 00:39:41,480 --> 00:39:43,600 Okay. I know that was the shortest shower 822 00:39:43,600 --> 00:39:45,000 I've ever taken, but I... 823 00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:48,360 I really didn't like the look on your face before. 824 00:39:48,360 --> 00:39:49,960 Be honest with me, Bree. 825 00:39:51,200 --> 00:39:52,760 Are you about to break up with me? 826 00:39:57,920 --> 00:39:59,360 Of course not. 827 00:40:01,720 --> 00:40:04,200 In fact, let's get you back in that shower. 828 00:40:08,480 --> 00:40:11,760 Yes, in the divided world of the suburbs, 829 00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:15,960 everyone is looking for some way to make a connection. 830 00:40:18,280 --> 00:40:22,480 Some seek to connect by focusing on a greater good... 831 00:40:25,160 --> 00:40:28,960 Some by revealing a common history... 832 00:40:32,000 --> 00:40:34,640 Some by sharing a pain 833 00:40:34,640 --> 00:40:37,040 no one else can heal. 834 00:40:39,640 --> 00:40:41,320 Then there are those 835 00:40:41,360 --> 00:40:44,040 Who once sought to make a connection... 836 00:40:46,280 --> 00:40:50,360 that they now want desperately to escape.