1 00:00:02,042 --> 00:00:02,918 Grandma's here. 2 00:00:02,918 --> 00:00:06,042 In life... it's a post-nuptial agreement. 3 00:00:06,042 --> 00:00:07,292 I'm not signing this. 4 00:00:07,292 --> 00:00:09,083 Aah! Sign it! 5 00:00:09,125 --> 00:00:11,459 Stop! You're hurting me! 6 00:00:11,501 --> 00:00:13,792 Mrs. Solís, what are you doing here? 7 00:00:13,834 --> 00:00:16,083 You can't change what's already been done. 8 00:00:16,083 --> 00:00:17,375 People leave trails. 9 00:00:17,375 --> 00:00:19,292 One of those trails will lead to Deirdre. 10 00:00:19,292 --> 00:00:20,918 I'm not taking my money to the grave. 11 00:00:20,918 --> 00:00:22,834 I'm going to use it to save your ass. 12 00:00:22,834 --> 00:00:24,918 Or who people really are. 13 00:00:24,918 --> 00:00:27,959 Andrew just told me he thinks he might be gay. 14 00:00:34,292 --> 00:00:35,501 Every morning 15 00:00:35,501 --> 00:00:37,209 as she went to take out her trash, 16 00:00:37,209 --> 00:00:40,417 Lynette Scavo would indulge in a little daydream, 17 00:00:40,792 --> 00:00:44,709 the details of which were always the same. 18 00:00:46,334 --> 00:00:49,042 One day her nasty neighbor Karen McCluskey 19 00:00:49,042 --> 00:00:52,167 would keel over and die, 20 00:00:53,626 --> 00:00:57,083 and her home would be bought by a lovely Swedish family 21 00:00:57,083 --> 00:01:00,834 with two adorable twin daughters. 22 00:01:00,834 --> 00:01:04,125 The families would form an everlasting friendship, 23 00:01:04,876 --> 00:01:08,751 culminating in their daughters marrying her sons 24 00:01:08,751 --> 00:01:10,542 at an elaborate wedding 25 00:01:11,167 --> 00:01:13,959 the Scavos wouldn't have to pay for. 26 00:01:17,042 --> 00:01:20,417 Yes, Lynette enjoyed her little daydream, 27 00:01:20,417 --> 00:01:24,000 but Mrs. McCluskey always had a way 28 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,292 of pulling her back to reality. 29 00:01:26,876 --> 00:01:29,292 Hey, hey, hey, hey. 30 00:01:29,918 --> 00:01:32,417 Why are you stealing my garbage cans? 31 00:01:32,417 --> 00:01:34,167 Garbage pickup was two days ago, 32 00:01:34,167 --> 00:01:35,918 And these cans have been on the street ever since. 33 00:01:35,918 --> 00:01:37,459 I just assumed you didn't want them anymore. 34 00:01:37,459 --> 00:01:38,834 Oh, that's very cute. 35 00:01:38,834 --> 00:01:41,459 That's good. Here. Give them he. 36 00:01:42,375 --> 00:01:44,417 It's bad enough we got to look at that god-awful color 37 00:01:44,417 --> 00:01:46,083 you painted the house. We shouldn't have to stare 38 00:01:46,083 --> 00:01:48,125 at your cans for days on end. 39 00:01:48,125 --> 00:01:49,792 You want to talk about good neighbor etiquette? 40 00:01:49,792 --> 00:01:51,167 How about you hire a gardener 41 00:01:51,167 --> 00:01:53,334 To take care of that jungle you call a lawn? 42 00:01:53,334 --> 00:01:55,125 I am on a fixed income. 43 00:01:55,125 --> 00:01:57,209 Oh. Well, perhaps you should consider 44 00:01:57,209 --> 00:01:58,709 Moving somewhere less expensive, 45 00:01:58,709 --> 00:02:00,000 Like a nursing home. 46 00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:02,250 Go to hell. Run by Germans, hmm? 47 00:02:05,709 --> 00:02:07,083 And you know -- 48 00:02:07,083 --> 00:02:09,626 Oh. Oh. 49 00:02:09,626 --> 00:02:11,667 Mrs. -- Mrs. McCluskey. 50 00:02:11,751 --> 00:02:13,626 Mrs. McCluskey, are you all right? 51 00:02:16,167 --> 00:02:17,417 I'll get the door. 52 00:02:20,584 --> 00:02:21,584 Mrs. McCluskey. 53 00:02:21,584 --> 00:02:24,626 For a brief moment, Lynette was presented 54 00:02:24,626 --> 00:02:26,959 with an interesting choice of options. 55 00:02:29,501 --> 00:02:32,459 And though she knew she'd hate herself in the morning, 56 00:02:32,459 --> 00:02:34,626 Lynette chose to do the right thing. 57 00:02:35,542 --> 00:02:37,501 Lynette, where are they taking me? 58 00:02:37,501 --> 00:02:39,542 You're going to the hospital, Mrs. McCluskey. 59 00:02:39,542 --> 00:02:40,626 You're going to be fine. 60 00:02:40,626 --> 00:02:42,626 I don't want to go alone. Come with me. 61 00:02:42,626 --> 00:02:45,709 Oh, um, these are trained technicians, 62 00:02:45,709 --> 00:02:49,167 And I've got a roast in the... freezer. 63 00:02:49,167 --> 00:02:51,876 Please. I'm scared. 64 00:02:54,792 --> 00:02:56,792 Yeah, I'll come with you. 65 00:02:56,792 --> 00:02:58,792 Okay, here I am. thank you. 66 00:03:00,959 --> 00:03:04,000 If I die, I don't want it to be with strangers. 67 00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:05,626 You're not going to die. 68 00:03:05,626 --> 00:03:07,375 How can you be so sure? 69 00:03:09,334 --> 00:03:12,292 Of course, Lynette didn't respond. 70 00:03:12,292 --> 00:03:16,209 How could she tell her neighbor that some dreams 71 00:03:16,209 --> 00:03:19,709 were just too beautiful to come true? 72 00:04:07,334 --> 00:04:09,542 life is a journey, 73 00:04:09,542 --> 00:04:14,125 one that is much better traveled with a companion by our side. 74 00:04:14,959 --> 00:04:18,792 But sometimes we lose our companions along the way, 75 00:04:19,584 --> 00:04:23,542 and then the journey becomes unbearable. 76 00:04:23,834 --> 00:04:25,083 Noah. 77 00:04:27,083 --> 00:04:29,000 Didn't know you were a religious man. 78 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:30,250 What's with the rosary? 79 00:04:31,334 --> 00:04:33,626 They found Deirdre. 80 00:04:34,334 --> 00:04:34,959 What? 81 00:04:35,959 --> 00:04:39,792 Her body had been stuffed inside a toy chest. 82 00:04:41,501 --> 00:04:42,709 Can you believe that? 83 00:04:43,584 --> 00:04:45,250 A kid's toy chest. 84 00:04:50,918 --> 00:04:52,501 She'd been dismembered. 85 00:04:59,292 --> 00:05:00,792 Oh, my god. 86 00:05:03,250 --> 00:05:05,834 Cops I. d. 'd her from her dental records. 87 00:05:09,083 --> 00:05:11,334 She's been dead 15 years. 88 00:05:12,667 --> 00:05:15,959 All that time I was looking for her, 89 00:05:16,918 --> 00:05:18,834 she was already gone. 90 00:05:20,751 --> 00:05:22,626 I'm so sorry. 91 00:05:25,876 --> 00:05:27,626 I have to bury my baby. 92 00:05:29,083 --> 00:05:31,000 I came out here to, uh... 93 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:34,167 Figure out what kind of Tombstone to get her. 94 00:05:36,083 --> 00:05:37,959 You shouldn't be doing this now. 95 00:05:37,959 --> 00:05:39,584 Let's get you home. 96 00:05:41,792 --> 00:05:43,709 There's a cop I want you to talk to. 97 00:05:44,250 --> 00:05:45,083 A cop? 98 00:05:45,083 --> 00:05:49,751 To take the heat off you for your neighbor's murder. 99 00:05:50,667 --> 00:05:52,667 He'll get you the file on Deirdre's case. 100 00:05:54,167 --> 00:05:56,250 Apparently, they have some leads. 101 00:06:04,501 --> 00:06:05,334 I don't know. 102 00:06:05,334 --> 00:06:07,584 I think we may be making a huge mistake. 103 00:06:07,584 --> 00:06:09,709 We made our decision. let's just stick to it. 104 00:06:09,709 --> 00:06:12,042 Let's say we leave him here three more weeks. 105 00:06:12,042 --> 00:06:13,959 What's the worst that could happen? 106 00:06:14,667 --> 00:06:17,959 Our son just told us that he might be gay. 107 00:06:17,959 --> 00:06:21,250 There are 200 her boys in this camp. 108 00:06:21,250 --> 00:06:23,709 Now, I could explain to you what might happen if 109 00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:26,459 we left him here, but I'm a lady, 110 00:06:26,459 --> 00:06:28,292 and I don't use that kind of language. 111 00:06:33,667 --> 00:06:36,167 You know, I bet we're worrying ourselves sick over nothing. 112 00:06:36,334 --> 00:06:37,626 This is probably just a phase. 113 00:06:37,626 --> 00:06:39,209 Exactly, so we'll get him home, 114 00:06:39,209 --> 00:06:40,876 we'll get him into Christian counseling 115 00:06:40,876 --> 00:06:42,083 so it won't become a lifestyle. 116 00:06:42,083 --> 00:06:43,584 Well, whatever's going on with him, 117 00:06:43,584 --> 00:06:45,292 he's still our son, and we love him. 118 00:06:46,042 --> 00:06:47,709 Why would you say that to me? 119 00:06:47,709 --> 00:06:50,167 Because it's obvious how freaked out you are 120 00:06:50,167 --> 00:06:52,000 by the whole gay thing. 121 00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:53,501 I may be freaked out, 122 00:06:53,501 --> 00:06:55,167 but that doesn't change how I feel about him. 123 00:06:55,167 --> 00:06:57,334 I'm just saying be cool. 124 00:07:01,334 --> 00:07:03,792 I can be just as cool as you can. 125 00:07:03,792 --> 00:07:04,792 All right. 126 00:07:15,542 --> 00:07:17,083 It'll be nice to have you back. 127 00:07:18,792 --> 00:07:23,709 Andrew... I would love you even if you were a murderer. 128 00:07:35,209 --> 00:07:37,167 Mommy, the line's not moving. 129 00:07:37,584 --> 00:07:39,542 Oh, for Pete's sake. 130 00:07:46,209 --> 00:07:48,083 Mom. Mom. 131 00:07:48,083 --> 00:07:49,042 What? Kids are waiting. 132 00:07:49,042 --> 00:07:52,250 Oh, honey, hector here teaches salsa dancing 133 00:07:52,250 --> 00:07:53,709 at the community center. 134 00:07:53,709 --> 00:07:55,375 I give private lessons, too. 135 00:07:55,375 --> 00:07:57,542 Oh, I bet you do. 136 00:07:57,542 --> 00:07:59,000 Mom. What? 137 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,209 Could you please not flirt with the ice cream man? 138 00:08:01,209 --> 00:08:01,918 Why not? 139 00:08:01,918 --> 00:08:03,834 Do you need a reason beyond the fact 140 00:08:03,834 --> 00:08:05,334 that he's the ice cream man? 141 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,959 It's called moving on with your life. 142 00:08:08,959 --> 00:08:10,792 You just broke up with Marty two weeks ago. 143 00:08:10,792 --> 00:08:12,542 Don't you think you can at least pretend 144 00:08:12,542 --> 00:08:14,083 to mourn the relationship? 145 00:08:14,083 --> 00:08:16,209 Oh, you are such a stick in the mud. 146 00:08:16,209 --> 00:08:18,542 We should be out there having fun. 147 00:08:19,334 --> 00:08:20,751 I know what we can do tonight. 148 00:08:20,751 --> 00:08:24,959 We can go to some hip club and get some hot guys. 149 00:08:24,959 --> 00:08:26,626 Mom --oh, it'll be great. 150 00:08:27,375 --> 00:08:29,667 I'll say I'm 42, and you can be 28. 151 00:08:30,751 --> 00:08:32,375 What? 152 00:08:32,375 --> 00:08:35,292 Oh, you can pull it off. 153 00:08:40,167 --> 00:08:43,959 Mrs. McCluskey, you're back from the hospital already? 154 00:08:43,959 --> 00:08:46,876 Turns out I o. d. 'd a little bit on my arthritis medication. 155 00:08:46,876 --> 00:08:48,751 One pill, I can open a jar. Four pills, 156 00:08:48,792 --> 00:08:50,876 I'm face-down crawling for my life. 157 00:08:50,876 --> 00:08:53,459 You'll find out about that soon enough. 158 00:08:53,459 --> 00:08:54,501 Ha ha. 159 00:08:54,501 --> 00:08:57,459 Well, I'm glad to hear you're all right. 160 00:08:57,459 --> 00:08:58,334 Here. 161 00:08:58,792 --> 00:09:00,167 My way of saying thank you 162 00:09:00,167 --> 00:09:02,083 for not letting me die out there on the lawn. 163 00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:03,584 Oh, Mrs. McCluskey, you don't -- 164 00:09:03,584 --> 00:09:05,959 Keep that. It's genuine tiffany. 165 00:09:05,959 --> 00:09:07,459 It's been in my family for years. 166 00:09:07,459 --> 00:09:10,167 I don't know what to say. 167 00:09:10,167 --> 00:09:12,209 It's -- it's stunning. Thank you. 168 00:09:25,751 --> 00:09:27,959 I'd invite you in, but -- 169 00:09:27,959 --> 00:09:29,709 Well, I wanted to tell you what my doctor said. 170 00:09:29,709 --> 00:09:31,751 Seems that arthritis is the least of my problems. 171 00:09:31,751 --> 00:09:33,459 See, I had this skin tag -- 172 00:09:33,459 --> 00:09:34,918 Or what I thought was a skin tag, 173 00:09:34,918 --> 00:09:37,000 but it turns out it might be more serious. 174 00:09:42,042 --> 00:09:43,167 What do you think you're doing? 175 00:09:43,709 --> 00:09:45,959 Please -- I can't sleep in the den anymore. 176 00:09:45,959 --> 00:09:47,000 I need to sleep in a bed. 177 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,876 Well, then, you might want to try a motel, 178 00:09:48,876 --> 00:09:50,501 because you're not coming back in here. 179 00:09:52,209 --> 00:09:54,876 How many times have I got to say I'm sorry? 180 00:09:54,876 --> 00:09:56,626 Obviously, a few more. 181 00:09:58,667 --> 00:10:00,834 I am not proud of what I did. 182 00:10:00,834 --> 00:10:03,167 I admit, I was way out of line. 183 00:10:04,209 --> 00:10:05,709 You want back in this bed? 184 00:10:05,709 --> 00:10:07,709 You know what to do. 185 00:10:09,792 --> 00:10:11,334 I'm not tearing up the post-nup. 186 00:10:11,334 --> 00:10:12,334 Why not? 187 00:10:12,334 --> 00:10:14,000 Because it's the one way that I can ensure 188 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:15,459 you'll be here when I get out of jail. 189 00:10:16,209 --> 00:10:17,959 Well, then have fun at the motel. 190 00:10:18,959 --> 00:10:20,334 Fine. 191 00:10:20,334 --> 00:10:23,000 Tomorrow I'm canceling your credit cards. 192 00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:24,292 What? 193 00:10:24,292 --> 00:10:26,125 And I'm taking away your ATM as well. 194 00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:28,667 What am I supposed to do for money? 195 00:10:28,667 --> 00:10:30,751 Maybe once you see how good you've got it here, 196 00:10:30,751 --> 00:10:32,417 you'll start treating me with a little respect. 197 00:10:32,417 --> 00:10:35,417 You want my respect? Then tear up the post-nup. 198 00:10:35,417 --> 00:10:37,042 Give me my pillow. 199 00:10:38,083 --> 00:10:40,292 One more thing -- 200 00:10:40,292 --> 00:10:43,626 If you ever hurt me again, I will kill you. 201 00:10:43,626 --> 00:10:45,417 If you ever leave me for another man, 202 00:10:45,417 --> 00:10:46,584 I'll kill you. 203 00:10:50,709 --> 00:10:52,501 Boy, with all this passion, 204 00:10:52,501 --> 00:10:54,292 isn't it a shame that we're not having sex? 205 00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:09,959 I feel trapped. 206 00:11:09,959 --> 00:11:12,083 You want me to open a window? 207 00:11:12,083 --> 00:11:14,167 No, I'm talking about my life. 208 00:11:14,167 --> 00:11:17,375 Oh. are we done making out? 209 00:11:18,042 --> 00:11:19,709 No, no. Keep going. 210 00:11:21,334 --> 00:11:22,751 So what's up? 211 00:11:22,751 --> 00:11:24,709 I'm unhappy 212 00:11:24,709 --> 00:11:26,876 with Carlos and my marriage. 213 00:11:26,876 --> 00:11:28,876 I feel like I don't have options, 214 00:11:28,876 --> 00:11:30,250 and it's driving me crazy. 215 00:11:30,250 --> 00:11:32,375 Every time something went south in my life, 216 00:11:32,375 --> 00:11:33,292 I always had a plan B. 217 00:11:33,292 --> 00:11:35,250 Now I feel like I have nothing. 218 00:11:35,250 --> 00:11:37,792 What about me? Can't I be your plan B? 219 00:11:37,792 --> 00:11:39,918 Damn it, John, what is our new rule? 220 00:11:40,626 --> 00:11:43,083 Stop pretending we have a future. 221 00:11:43,083 --> 00:11:43,918 Thank you. 222 00:11:43,918 --> 00:11:46,125 Can't you just walk out? 223 00:11:46,125 --> 00:11:48,501 No, 'cause if I leave, then I'll be broke, 224 00:11:48,501 --> 00:11:49,834 and that's awful. If I stay, 225 00:11:50,584 --> 00:11:52,459 then he's in control, and that's horrifying. 226 00:11:52,459 --> 00:11:54,000 And he cut up all my credit cards, 227 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,792 which means I'm married to him and unable to shop, 228 00:11:56,792 --> 00:11:59,876 which is probably the worst of all possible worlds. 229 00:12:00,751 --> 00:12:01,584 I'm sorry. 230 00:12:01,584 --> 00:12:03,250 I'll figure something out. 231 00:12:04,959 --> 00:12:07,042 I'm not much fun today. 232 00:12:07,042 --> 00:12:08,459 I'm going to go. 233 00:12:11,584 --> 00:12:12,542 Wait. 234 00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:16,959 What's this? 235 00:12:16,959 --> 00:12:18,584 You deserve nice things, 236 00:12:18,584 --> 00:12:21,250 and if Mr. Solís won't provide them, I will. 237 00:12:22,501 --> 00:12:25,167 With your student credit card? 238 00:12:25,167 --> 00:12:26,375 I own my own business. 239 00:12:26,375 --> 00:12:28,501 You mow lawns. I make good money. 240 00:12:28,501 --> 00:12:30,542 You know, I have 20 houses, and I'm this close 241 00:12:30,542 --> 00:12:31,959 to getting the driving range at the country club. 242 00:12:31,959 --> 00:12:32,667 I can't. 243 00:12:32,667 --> 00:12:33,959 Yes, you can. 244 00:12:40,751 --> 00:12:42,375 I'll pay it off. 245 00:12:42,918 --> 00:12:45,292 If you want. But you don't have to. 246 00:12:46,042 --> 00:12:49,792 Mrs. Solís... to take care of you -- 247 00:12:49,792 --> 00:12:51,918 It's my dream. 248 00:12:53,292 --> 00:12:55,459 Well, far be it from me 249 00:12:55,459 --> 00:12:58,042 to stand in the way of a young man's dream. 250 00:12:59,584 --> 00:13:00,751 Okay, Tom, yeah. 251 00:13:00,751 --> 00:13:02,292 I will swing by the dry cleaners 252 00:13:02,292 --> 00:13:03,584 after I hit the market. 253 00:13:04,042 --> 00:13:05,459 Mm, I don't know. 254 00:13:05,459 --> 00:13:08,000 Porter has a dentist appointment at 4:00, 255 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:10,834 so the, um, car might have to wait until tomorrow. 256 00:13:10,834 --> 00:13:14,250 Okay, yeah. I love you, too. Bye-bye. 257 00:13:14,250 --> 00:13:17,125 Hi there. I brought you some avocados. 258 00:13:17,125 --> 00:13:18,584 I have a tree in back, but I hate them, 259 00:13:18,584 --> 00:13:19,876 and your family seems like the kind 260 00:13:19,876 --> 00:13:21,083 that would eat guacamole. 261 00:13:21,834 --> 00:13:25,167 Um, Mrs. McCluskey, thank you. That is very nice. 262 00:13:25,167 --> 00:13:26,209 So let's make up a batch. 263 00:13:26,209 --> 00:13:29,125 Oh, um, now's not a good time. 264 00:13:29,125 --> 00:13:31,751 I'm on my way out. I have a ton of errands. 265 00:13:31,751 --> 00:13:34,209 Oh, that's great, because my car's on the fritz, 266 00:13:34,209 --> 00:13:35,501 and I could hitch a ride. 267 00:13:35,501 --> 00:13:36,709 I need to drop by the pharmacy anyway. 268 00:13:36,709 --> 00:13:38,792 No, I can't. I'm sorry, 269 00:13:38,792 --> 00:13:40,667 but I-I have a lot of things to do. 270 00:13:40,667 --> 00:13:42,959 Maybe you could take me later. I could drop by tomorrow. 271 00:13:43,334 --> 00:13:45,751 Mrs. McCluskey, I'm not going to have any time tomorrow. 272 00:13:45,751 --> 00:13:49,542 Oh. Kind of interesting that you can't spend two minutes 273 00:13:49,542 --> 00:13:52,667 with me, but you have no trouble taking my tiffany lamp. 274 00:13:53,667 --> 00:13:58,876 Oh, for god's sakes. Here. 275 00:13:59,542 --> 00:14:01,042 You should take this back. 276 00:14:01,042 --> 00:14:04,250 I-I don't have a place for it. 277 00:14:04,250 --> 00:14:06,459 But that was my thank you for saving my life. 278 00:14:06,459 --> 00:14:09,542 I know, and it was a beautiful gesture. 279 00:14:09,542 --> 00:14:12,125 Really. but I just -- 280 00:14:12,125 --> 00:14:15,125 Save it, Lynette. I get the picture. 281 00:14:28,209 --> 00:14:30,209 Oh, god. 282 00:14:30,209 --> 00:14:33,501 Susie, this is Tim. Ha ha. 283 00:14:34,167 --> 00:14:35,876 Sorry we startled you. ha ha. 284 00:14:35,876 --> 00:14:39,250 Oh, uh, that's okay. I -- 285 00:14:39,250 --> 00:14:41,834 I just didn't expect to see anybody up 286 00:14:41,834 --> 00:14:43,542 at a quarter to 1:00. 287 00:14:43,542 --> 00:14:46,292 Oh, Susie, you should have come out tonight. 288 00:14:46,292 --> 00:14:48,959 I met Tim here at the Islands bar, 289 00:14:48,959 --> 00:14:52,083 and he introduced me to this crazy drink -- 290 00:14:52,083 --> 00:14:54,000 Ha ha --the dirty volcano. 291 00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:55,542 Whoo. 292 00:14:55,542 --> 00:14:57,417 And then we danced, 293 00:14:58,167 --> 00:14:59,876 and he dipped me. 294 00:14:59,876 --> 00:15:01,792 Sophie's very limber. 295 00:15:01,792 --> 00:15:05,459 Uh, mom, could I just talk to you 296 00:15:05,459 --> 00:15:07,083 In the family room for a minute? 297 00:15:07,083 --> 00:15:07,918 Oh, sure. 298 00:15:07,918 --> 00:15:10,083 Susan is your daughter? 299 00:15:10,083 --> 00:15:12,083 Ha ha. Yeah. 300 00:15:12,083 --> 00:15:14,584 No, she can't be. yes. 301 00:15:14,584 --> 00:15:16,709 No. yeah. no. yeah. 302 00:15:16,709 --> 00:15:18,542 No. yes. 303 00:15:18,542 --> 00:15:20,959 Okay, we get it. She looks young. 304 00:15:20,959 --> 00:15:22,000 Oh. 305 00:15:25,626 --> 00:15:28,167 That man has magic fingers. 306 00:15:28,167 --> 00:15:30,542 What are you doing? I have a teenage daughter in the house. 307 00:15:30,542 --> 00:15:32,083 You can't just bring strange men 308 00:15:32,083 --> 00:15:34,042 you meet in bars here in the middle of the night. 309 00:15:34,042 --> 00:15:35,626 We're just having a few laughs. 310 00:15:35,626 --> 00:15:37,250 What's the big deal? 311 00:15:37,250 --> 00:15:38,667 I know you're trying to get over Marty, 312 00:15:38,667 --> 00:15:40,083 but this is not the way to do it, 313 00:15:40,083 --> 00:15:41,584 so can you please just go out there 314 00:15:41,584 --> 00:15:42,584 and tell him to go home? 315 00:15:42,584 --> 00:15:44,667 You know how blue I've been. 316 00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:46,959 Why can't you be supportive? 317 00:15:46,959 --> 00:15:48,167 I have been plenty supportive. 318 00:15:48,292 --> 00:15:50,334 No, you haven't. You really haven't. 319 00:15:50,334 --> 00:15:52,459 Now, Tim is my guest, 320 00:15:52,459 --> 00:15:54,501 And he will go home when I say so. 321 00:15:57,375 --> 00:15:59,834 If he's not gone in five minutes, 322 00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:01,250 I'm going to go out there and tell him 323 00:16:01,250 --> 00:16:02,834 exactly how old you really are. 324 00:16:12,375 --> 00:16:15,083 Tim, it's time for me to go sleepy-bye. 325 00:16:15,083 --> 00:16:16,834 Ha ha. 326 00:16:24,292 --> 00:16:25,375 Delfino. 327 00:16:28,083 --> 00:16:29,083 Yeah. 328 00:16:29,918 --> 00:16:31,626 You must be Sullivan. 329 00:16:33,792 --> 00:16:35,626 The file on Noah's daughter. 330 00:16:36,375 --> 00:16:38,667 Yeah, he said you had some leads. 331 00:16:39,709 --> 00:16:41,542 Yeah, sure, we got some leads. 332 00:16:43,584 --> 00:16:44,834 Is there a problem? 333 00:16:44,834 --> 00:16:46,334 Gee, I don't know. 334 00:16:46,334 --> 00:16:48,542 I'm handing a confidential police report 335 00:16:48,542 --> 00:16:50,876 over to a killer and drug dealer. 336 00:16:50,876 --> 00:16:52,959 Why should that be a problem? 337 00:16:57,417 --> 00:16:58,709 Thanks. 338 00:17:00,125 --> 00:17:02,000 Is this what our justice system has come to -- 339 00:17:02,167 --> 00:17:03,792 guys like you walking the streets 340 00:17:03,792 --> 00:17:05,125 without a care in the world? 341 00:17:06,083 --> 00:17:07,959 I did my time. 342 00:17:07,959 --> 00:17:10,501 Not nearly enough, you piece of garbage. 343 00:17:14,626 --> 00:17:16,417 You know, I'm glad we had the chance to meet, 344 00:17:17,667 --> 00:17:20,167 because apparently, I'm no longer 345 00:17:20,167 --> 00:17:22,042 a murder suspect thanks to you, 346 00:17:22,501 --> 00:17:24,209 so I don't want to seem ungrateful. 347 00:17:24,209 --> 00:17:26,501 But just out of curiosity -- 348 00:17:26,501 --> 00:17:30,626 how much does it cost to buy off a homicide detective these days? 349 00:17:35,792 --> 00:17:36,751 Thanks again. 350 00:17:38,792 --> 00:17:41,042 Hey, Delfino... one more thing. 351 00:17:59,375 --> 00:18:04,083 Now, this file is misplaced. understand? 352 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:08,459 If even a whisper of this gets traced back to me, 353 00:18:08,459 --> 00:18:12,000 there will be one less cop killer on the street. 354 00:18:18,667 --> 00:18:20,542 And for god's sakes... 355 00:18:20,542 --> 00:18:22,876 Don't get any blood on the file. 356 00:18:43,959 --> 00:18:45,709 Ma'am, I'm sorry, 357 00:18:45,709 --> 00:18:47,834 But your credit card has been declined. 358 00:18:47,834 --> 00:18:48,792 What? 359 00:18:50,083 --> 00:18:52,542 Oh, no, that's impossible. it's a new card. 360 00:18:52,542 --> 00:18:54,250 I just went shopping with it. 361 00:18:54,250 --> 00:18:55,584 Try it again. 362 00:18:55,584 --> 00:18:58,542 Ma'am, I ran it three times, and then I called the bank. 363 00:18:58,542 --> 00:19:00,584 Now, may I try another card? 364 00:19:01,292 --> 00:19:03,417 Of course you may. 365 00:19:03,417 --> 00:19:05,000 Will you just give me a moment? 366 00:19:13,459 --> 00:19:15,000 Hello? It's me. 367 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:17,375 I've been trying to call you, but you turned your cell off. 368 00:19:17,375 --> 00:19:18,834 Because I'm in a lovely restaurant 369 00:19:18,834 --> 00:19:21,000 having a lovely meal that I now can't pay for. 370 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:22,709 Well, did you order already? 371 00:19:22,709 --> 00:19:23,792 I ate already. 372 00:19:23,792 --> 00:19:26,250 Look, the credit card company called my mom. 373 00:19:26,250 --> 00:19:28,876 I mean, they said that there was unusual activity on my card. 374 00:19:28,876 --> 00:19:31,083 I bought shoes. well, I didn't know that. 375 00:19:31,083 --> 00:19:33,292 And then my mom started asking all these questions, 376 00:19:33,292 --> 00:19:35,417 so I just blurted out that the card was stolen, 377 00:19:35,417 --> 00:19:36,375 And she canceled it. 378 00:19:36,375 --> 00:19:38,292 Why would they call your parents? It's your account. 379 00:19:38,292 --> 00:19:40,209 They co-signed for it. 380 00:19:40,959 --> 00:19:43,667 Look, if you just explain to the waiter -- 381 00:19:43,667 --> 00:19:45,918 What, that the credit card was canceled 382 00:19:45,918 --> 00:19:47,125 by my lover's mommy? 383 00:19:47,125 --> 00:19:48,626 Well, what other options do you have? 384 00:19:48,626 --> 00:19:51,000 Unless you return the shoes and get the money back. 385 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:52,751 Return the shoes? 386 00:19:53,542 --> 00:19:55,626 I can't talk to you when you're being hysterical. 387 00:19:58,751 --> 00:19:59,709 So, ma'am, 388 00:19:59,709 --> 00:20:01,292 what would you like to do about the bill? 389 00:20:14,918 --> 00:20:17,292 Afternoon. I've got a package for your neighbor 390 00:20:17,292 --> 00:20:19,125 Karen McCluskey. You mind signing? 391 00:20:19,125 --> 00:20:21,375 Well, isn't she home? She usually never goes anywhere. 392 00:20:21,375 --> 00:20:22,250 No one answered. 393 00:20:23,292 --> 00:20:29,125 All right. Okay. 394 00:20:29,667 --> 00:20:30,959 Thank you. 395 00:20:41,918 --> 00:20:43,417 So let me get this straight -- 396 00:20:43,417 --> 00:20:46,417 you play tennis, you know wine, 397 00:20:46,417 --> 00:20:47,876 and you speak mandarin. 398 00:20:47,876 --> 00:20:50,792 Does every other man in the world want you dead? 399 00:20:50,792 --> 00:20:51,876 Ha ha ha ha. 400 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:53,584 Well, I'm not that impressive. 401 00:20:53,584 --> 00:20:56,209 I pulled a gray hair out of my chest this morning. 402 00:20:56,626 --> 00:20:59,167 Ha ha. I don't know. I'd watch your back. 403 00:21:01,125 --> 00:21:03,667 You know, I've really enjoyed talking to you. 404 00:21:03,667 --> 00:21:05,459 You, uh... 405 00:21:06,667 --> 00:21:08,626 Well, you made my day. 406 00:21:09,542 --> 00:21:11,792 I was thinking if you'd like to get together again... 407 00:21:12,667 --> 00:21:16,125 Well, Sam, to --to tell you the truth, 408 00:21:16,125 --> 00:21:18,000 I'm kind of in a relationship right now. 409 00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:20,250 I just wanted to be honest. 410 00:21:20,250 --> 00:21:22,042 That's perfectly okay, Tina. 411 00:21:24,501 --> 00:21:27,626 By the way... this is on me. 412 00:21:27,626 --> 00:21:29,250 Oh, no, you shouldn't. 413 00:21:29,250 --> 00:21:30,167 Oh, please. 414 00:21:30,876 --> 00:21:32,459 It's my pleasure. 415 00:21:39,334 --> 00:21:40,792 This is going to be a disaster. 416 00:21:40,792 --> 00:21:42,000 It'll be fine. 417 00:21:44,209 --> 00:21:47,250 Andrew, honey, hurry up. dinner's ready. 418 00:21:47,250 --> 00:21:49,250 It's like we're setting a trap for him. 419 00:21:49,250 --> 00:21:52,125 It's for his own good. you'll see. 420 00:21:53,083 --> 00:21:55,292 Smells good. 421 00:21:55,292 --> 00:21:56,459 What are we having? 422 00:21:56,459 --> 00:22:00,209 I'm making homemade bratwurst with sweet-and-sour cabbage. 423 00:22:00,209 --> 00:22:03,167 It's a recipe I found in an old German cookbook. 424 00:22:05,626 --> 00:22:06,542 I'll get the door. 425 00:22:06,542 --> 00:22:08,042 Honey, why don't you pour the wine? 426 00:22:11,667 --> 00:22:13,876 Isn't Danielle spending the night at Wendy's? 427 00:22:13,876 --> 00:22:14,876 I believe she is. 428 00:22:15,542 --> 00:22:18,542 Well, then why did mom set the table for four places? 429 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:22,167 Uh, I asked who's coming for dinner. 430 00:22:23,709 --> 00:22:27,292 Andrew... you remember Reverend Sikes, don't you? 431 00:22:27,959 --> 00:22:29,792 Oh, come on. 432 00:22:30,042 --> 00:22:32,626 Um, Reverend, why don't you have seat, 433 00:22:32,626 --> 00:22:34,459 And I will get some refreshments? 434 00:22:38,667 --> 00:22:42,876 So, Andrew... it's been a long time. 435 00:22:43,626 --> 00:22:46,125 Yes. yes, it has. 436 00:22:46,125 --> 00:22:48,250 Would you like some water? I have flat or bubbly. 437 00:22:48,250 --> 00:22:49,417 Oh, bubbly, please. 438 00:22:50,876 --> 00:22:52,292 So... 439 00:22:52,292 --> 00:22:54,918 your mother tells me you've started having 440 00:22:54,918 --> 00:22:57,250 some sexual desires for other boys. 441 00:23:03,334 --> 00:23:04,459 I don't suppose I could get some of that. 442 00:23:04,459 --> 00:23:07,375 Nope. I'm going to need every drop. 443 00:23:09,292 --> 00:23:10,459 And over the years, 444 00:23:10,459 --> 00:23:14,125 we've had so many young people come to our ministry 445 00:23:14,125 --> 00:23:16,959 hating themselves for their unnatural desires, 446 00:23:16,959 --> 00:23:19,709 and within a few months, they've found an inner peace 447 00:23:19,709 --> 00:23:22,959 and a tranquility that is nothing short of miraculous. 448 00:23:22,959 --> 00:23:24,000 Oh. 449 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:25,959 And all it takes is a little faith 450 00:23:25,959 --> 00:23:28,000 and a desire to change. 451 00:23:28,751 --> 00:23:30,834 I'm sorry, but I-I really don't 452 00:23:30,834 --> 00:23:32,292 want to talk about my sex life. 453 00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:34,834 Well, that's just too bad, 454 00:23:34,834 --> 00:23:36,250 because this needs to be discussed. 455 00:23:36,250 --> 00:23:40,459 Bree, please, let the boy speak. Go on. 456 00:23:40,876 --> 00:23:43,083 Well, I appreciate your offer to help. 457 00:23:43,083 --> 00:23:46,792 I do. but I don't hate myself. 458 00:23:47,542 --> 00:23:49,375 So I'm good. 459 00:23:50,083 --> 00:23:52,083 Son, I know what it's like to be a teenager. 460 00:23:52,083 --> 00:23:54,209 It's a very confusing time. 461 00:23:54,209 --> 00:23:55,417 I'm not confused. 462 00:23:55,417 --> 00:23:59,000 I know exactly who I am. 463 00:23:59,959 --> 00:24:07,626 Well... if you ever do want to talk, 464 00:24:08,209 --> 00:24:09,834 my door is always open. 465 00:24:12,834 --> 00:24:18,125 Reverend, I don't mean to criticize, but... 466 00:24:18,125 --> 00:24:20,584 It sounds like you're giving up. 467 00:24:21,918 --> 00:24:24,501 We can't force him on the path of righteousness. 468 00:24:24,501 --> 00:24:27,792 He himself has got to want to make the journey. 469 00:24:28,501 --> 00:24:29,959 Well, then, what do we do, 470 00:24:29,959 --> 00:24:32,792 Just stand by while he starts dating boys? 471 00:24:32,792 --> 00:24:34,626 And by the way, the correct word is not "gay". 472 00:24:34,626 --> 00:24:35,751 It's "sodomy". 473 00:24:35,834 --> 00:24:37,083 We're in the middle of dinner. So? 474 00:24:37,083 --> 00:24:38,834 So can you at least wait till dessert 475 00:24:38,834 --> 00:24:40,667 before calling our son a sodomite? 476 00:24:40,667 --> 00:24:43,167 How you can sit there and be so casual is beyond me. 477 00:24:43,167 --> 00:24:45,667 For starters, I knew this dinner was a bad idea 478 00:24:45,667 --> 00:24:46,709 the moment you suggested it. 479 00:24:46,709 --> 00:24:48,959 Well, at least I'm trying to be proactive. 480 00:24:48,959 --> 00:24:50,459 Please, there's no need to get upset. 481 00:24:50,459 --> 00:24:52,334 I am upset because there is a problem here, 482 00:24:52,334 --> 00:24:53,792 and no one seems to notice it but me. 483 00:24:53,792 --> 00:24:56,459 As far as I'm concerned, if Andrew is happy 484 00:24:56,459 --> 00:24:59,000 with who he is, then it is our job to support him. 485 00:25:07,876 --> 00:25:10,000 Your father is into S&M. 486 00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:11,167 Bree. 487 00:25:11,167 --> 00:25:13,709 He makes me beat him with a riding crop, and I let him. 488 00:25:13,709 --> 00:25:17,000 It's no wonder you're perverted. Look who your parents are. 489 00:25:23,709 --> 00:25:24,709 Excuse me. 490 00:25:27,125 --> 00:25:29,083 What a fun night. 491 00:25:29,959 --> 00:25:32,334 You know, we should really do this again sometime. 492 00:25:44,375 --> 00:25:47,876 Hey. hey -- good news. 493 00:25:48,584 --> 00:25:50,834 I know why you've been so furious at me. 494 00:25:50,834 --> 00:25:52,501 I haven't been furious at you. 495 00:25:52,501 --> 00:25:53,375 Oh, well, yes, you have, 496 00:25:53,375 --> 00:25:54,584 And I don't blame you. 497 00:25:54,584 --> 00:25:57,959 Men have been coming on to me left and right, 498 00:25:57,959 --> 00:25:59,918 and I just -- I've been having so much fun 499 00:25:59,918 --> 00:26:02,292 and just enjoying life, and -- 500 00:26:02,292 --> 00:26:04,626 what do I do? I throw it right in your face. 501 00:26:04,626 --> 00:26:06,417 I'd hate me, too. 502 00:26:06,417 --> 00:26:07,834 Mom, I don't hate you. 503 00:26:08,292 --> 00:26:10,792 Well, be that as it may, 504 00:26:10,792 --> 00:26:12,042 from here on out, 505 00:26:12,042 --> 00:26:13,918 I'm including you in all the fun. 506 00:26:13,918 --> 00:26:15,334 The fun? Mm-hmm. 507 00:26:15,334 --> 00:26:16,876 Your mother's come through. 508 00:26:17,542 --> 00:26:18,834 What have you done? 509 00:26:18,834 --> 00:26:22,125 You and I are going on a double date tonight. 510 00:26:22,125 --> 00:26:22,792 What? 511 00:26:22,792 --> 00:26:24,626 Tim has a friend from the box factory, 512 00:26:24,626 --> 00:26:26,667 and I thought the four of us could hang out, 513 00:26:26,667 --> 00:26:28,542 have a few drinks, some hors d'oeuvres, and -- 514 00:26:28,542 --> 00:26:29,292 Forget it. 515 00:26:29,292 --> 00:26:30,250 Well, Susie -- 516 00:26:30,250 --> 00:26:31,626 Mom, I'm sorry. 517 00:26:31,626 --> 00:26:33,667 I'm just not in the mood to hang out these days. 518 00:26:33,667 --> 00:26:36,709 Susie, sweetie, please, I can't cancel now. 519 00:26:36,709 --> 00:26:37,959 Of course you can. 520 00:26:37,959 --> 00:26:40,459 Just call them up and tell them not to come over. 521 00:26:45,834 --> 00:26:48,083 Tim. hi, Suse. 522 00:26:48,083 --> 00:26:50,209 This is --this is my buddy Lamont. 523 00:26:50,209 --> 00:26:52,334 I brought peppermint schnapps. 524 00:27:06,042 --> 00:27:07,667 I'm sure she's fine. 525 00:27:08,125 --> 00:27:10,959 She never leaves her mail sitting out there. 526 00:27:10,959 --> 00:27:13,209 I mean, how many times has she thrown ours away 527 00:27:13,209 --> 00:27:15,334 because we didn't pick it up the second it came? 528 00:27:15,334 --> 00:27:16,792 Ha ha. That would be five. 529 00:27:16,792 --> 00:27:18,250 I don't know, Tom. 530 00:27:18,250 --> 00:27:20,167 I think something's happened to her. 531 00:27:20,167 --> 00:27:21,751 Okay, so go over and check on her. 532 00:27:21,751 --> 00:27:24,209 But if I'm wrong, then I'm sucked 533 00:27:24,209 --> 00:27:26,792 into a 2-hour conversation about bunions. 534 00:27:26,792 --> 00:27:27,876 Don't go check on her. 535 00:27:27,876 --> 00:27:29,959 Six months from now, when they find her mummified 536 00:27:29,959 --> 00:27:31,876 corpse at the bottom of the basement stairs, 537 00:27:31,876 --> 00:27:33,125 What do I tell the kids? 538 00:27:33,125 --> 00:27:35,167 "Oh, yeah, I let Mrs. McCluskey die. " 539 00:27:35,167 --> 00:27:37,000 Yeah, and why would they care? 540 00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:39,042 Like they're going to miss the dry cleaning coupons 541 00:27:39,042 --> 00:27:40,626 she hands out on Halloween. 542 00:27:40,626 --> 00:27:41,834 Tom. 543 00:27:41,834 --> 00:27:44,417 Listen, honey, what can I say? 544 00:27:44,417 --> 00:27:46,083 You're damned if you do, you're damned if you don't, 545 00:27:46,083 --> 00:27:48,584 so, uh, good luck with that. 546 00:27:49,501 --> 00:27:52,459 Honey, I'm hating you a little bit right now. 547 00:27:57,292 --> 00:28:00,042 Hi, honey. look at my new shoes. 548 00:28:01,292 --> 00:28:02,501 Aren't they gorgeous? 549 00:28:02,501 --> 00:28:03,876 Honey, I'm trying to watch the game. 550 00:28:05,167 --> 00:28:07,083 Sorry. 551 00:28:12,959 --> 00:28:14,542 How'd you buy new shoes? 552 00:28:14,542 --> 00:28:17,584 Shh. Talk later. You're watching the game. 553 00:28:17,584 --> 00:28:19,167 No, I want to talk about it now. 554 00:28:20,042 --> 00:28:21,834 You don't have any money, so what's the story? 555 00:28:21,834 --> 00:28:23,250 Oh, you've heard it before. 556 00:28:23,250 --> 00:28:26,125 Girl meets boy, boy buys girl things, 557 00:28:26,125 --> 00:28:27,501 girl leaves happy. 558 00:28:27,501 --> 00:28:29,000 What did you do? 559 00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:31,042 You know, I forgot how generous men could be. 560 00:28:31,792 --> 00:28:35,167 I also forgot I have options -- a whole bunch of them. 561 00:28:35,167 --> 00:28:36,375 What the hell are you talking about? 562 00:28:36,375 --> 00:28:37,876 I don't need your credit cards, Carlos, 563 00:28:37,876 --> 00:28:39,292 And I don't need your money, 564 00:28:39,292 --> 00:28:41,167 But if our marriage is going to work, 565 00:28:41,167 --> 00:28:42,292 I need your respect. 566 00:28:43,459 --> 00:28:44,751 I'm not ripping up the post-nup. 567 00:28:44,751 --> 00:28:47,918 Yes, you are. because if you don't, 568 00:28:47,918 --> 00:28:50,959 I'm going to put on my new shoes and walk out the door. 569 00:28:52,334 --> 00:28:53,459 You're threatening me. 570 00:28:53,459 --> 00:28:55,209 No, I'm just pointing something out. 571 00:28:55,834 --> 00:28:57,083 I'm a pretty girl, 572 00:28:57,083 --> 00:28:59,167 and pretty girls are never lonely. 573 00:29:15,375 --> 00:29:18,125 Stop --I'm really ticklish. 574 00:29:19,250 --> 00:29:22,250 So, uh, children's books, right? 575 00:29:22,667 --> 00:29:24,250 Don't! That tickles! 576 00:29:24,250 --> 00:29:25,584 Well, I hope you know how lucky you are. 577 00:29:25,584 --> 00:29:28,501 Not everyone gets to realize their bliss. 578 00:29:29,083 --> 00:29:31,501 Yeah, it can be rewarding. 579 00:29:32,709 --> 00:29:34,042 Why don't you join me? 580 00:29:37,876 --> 00:29:39,042 No. 581 00:29:39,042 --> 00:29:42,584 I'm really ticklish. Ha ha ha! 582 00:29:42,584 --> 00:29:43,584 Come on! 583 00:29:43,584 --> 00:29:44,626 What's wrong? 584 00:29:44,626 --> 00:29:46,792 For god's sake, Tim, she's ticklish! 585 00:29:46,792 --> 00:29:48,459 How many times do you have to be told? 586 00:29:48,459 --> 00:29:51,042 Oh, plfft. this is so much fun. 587 00:29:51,042 --> 00:29:52,792 Come on, let's find another CD. 588 00:29:53,417 --> 00:29:56,250 Mother, don't you think it's getting a little late? 589 00:29:56,250 --> 00:29:57,584 Come on. 590 00:29:58,375 --> 00:30:00,584 You haven't even finished your schnapps. 591 00:30:08,584 --> 00:30:10,834 The perfect capper to the perfect evening. 592 00:30:10,834 --> 00:30:12,375 So good night. 593 00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:14,584 It's been lovely, 594 00:30:14,584 --> 00:30:17,083 And, Lamont, good luck with all our inventions. 595 00:30:17,083 --> 00:30:19,250 Well, it's only 11:30. 596 00:30:19,250 --> 00:30:21,542 I want to hit the clubs. 597 00:30:21,542 --> 00:30:23,626 Well, I know a great place just off the interstate. 598 00:30:23,626 --> 00:30:26,125 Come on. let's warm up the old war wagon. 599 00:30:26,125 --> 00:30:27,292 Mom, hold it! 600 00:30:28,501 --> 00:30:31,417 You are not getting into the car alone with those two. 601 00:30:31,417 --> 00:30:32,584 You barely know them. 602 00:30:32,584 --> 00:30:34,792 I have great instincts about people. 603 00:30:34,792 --> 00:30:36,876 I always have, Susie. You know that. 604 00:30:36,876 --> 00:30:38,667 You've been married four times. 605 00:30:38,667 --> 00:30:41,667 Yes, but twice to the same guy. 606 00:30:43,501 --> 00:30:44,918 Mother. 607 00:30:44,918 --> 00:30:47,626 Susie, please, you are embarrassing me. 608 00:30:47,626 --> 00:30:49,417 Oh, I'm embarrassing you? 609 00:30:49,417 --> 00:30:51,209 Yes, and I've had it. 610 00:30:51,209 --> 00:30:53,209 All night long, I've been trying to 611 00:30:53,209 --> 00:30:54,918 get you to stop being so crabby, 612 00:30:54,918 --> 00:30:57,751 and you refuse to let me help. 613 00:30:57,751 --> 00:30:59,667 And -- and your idea of helping 614 00:30:59,667 --> 00:31:01,584 is letting Tim just grope you? 615 00:31:01,584 --> 00:31:04,375 Hey! You shouldn't talk to your mother like that. 616 00:31:04,375 --> 00:31:05,501 She's a fine lady. 617 00:31:05,501 --> 00:31:07,125 Tim, could you just stay out of it? 618 00:31:07,125 --> 00:31:08,626 Yeah, mind your own business. 619 00:31:08,626 --> 00:31:10,417 Hey, what's your problem, pal? 620 00:31:10,417 --> 00:31:12,709 Dude, you were feeling up her mother. 621 00:31:12,709 --> 00:31:15,042 It pissed me off, too. come on, Susie. 622 00:31:15,042 --> 00:31:17,000 Let's go back inside. 623 00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:19,709 "Let's go back inside"? Lamont, give it up. 624 00:31:19,709 --> 00:31:21,042 You're not getting any. 625 00:31:21,042 --> 00:31:23,501 Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. 626 00:31:24,083 --> 00:31:25,417 Why are you being this way? 627 00:31:25,417 --> 00:31:28,292 Just -- I'm just trying to lighten things up. 628 00:31:28,292 --> 00:31:31,000 Stop acting like tonight was about helping me. 629 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,250 You wanted to go out and have fun, 630 00:31:33,250 --> 00:31:34,751 and Lamont over there needed a date. 631 00:31:34,751 --> 00:31:36,667 That's not true. Oh, yes, it is. 632 00:31:38,083 --> 00:31:41,542 Okay, fine, it's true. 633 00:31:41,542 --> 00:31:43,417 I wanted to get out and have fun. 634 00:31:43,417 --> 00:31:44,667 Why shouldn't I? 635 00:31:44,667 --> 00:31:47,584 You know how depressed I've been over my breakup with Marty. 636 00:31:47,584 --> 00:31:50,000 Yeah, I do, and that's what makes me so crazy. 637 00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:51,918 You know, the difference between you and I -- 638 00:31:51,918 --> 00:31:55,501 that you could be heartbroken and you can just move on, 639 00:31:55,501 --> 00:31:59,000 and I... am just broken. 640 00:32:03,375 --> 00:32:06,792 I know you're sad. 641 00:32:06,792 --> 00:32:09,250 No, mom, I'm not sad. 642 00:32:09,250 --> 00:32:11,083 And I'm not crabby. 643 00:32:11,083 --> 00:32:15,417 I'm devastated, and you keep acting 644 00:32:15,417 --> 00:32:17,083 like all I need is a couple of aspirin. 645 00:32:17,083 --> 00:32:21,626 Marty was just one guy in a series of guys for you. 646 00:32:21,626 --> 00:32:26,501 And mike... he was the one. 647 00:32:27,417 --> 00:32:29,626 Why don't you get that? 648 00:32:36,918 --> 00:32:41,167 It's Lynette. Hello? 649 00:32:42,959 --> 00:32:44,834 Mrs. McCluskey? 650 00:32:48,167 --> 00:32:50,417 Mrs. McCluskey. You all right? 651 00:32:50,417 --> 00:32:51,542 How did you get in here? 652 00:32:51,542 --> 00:32:54,792 Uh, Mr. Mullins had a spare. 653 00:32:56,959 --> 00:32:58,167 Why didn't you open the door? 654 00:32:58,167 --> 00:32:59,876 Because I was hoping that you'd go away. 655 00:33:00,834 --> 00:33:04,501 Have you been taking your arthritis medication? 656 00:33:04,501 --> 00:33:06,334 I don't need to. 657 00:33:06,334 --> 00:33:08,375 Sometimes the pain goes away by itself. 658 00:33:08,375 --> 00:33:11,709 Uh-huh. Is that why you didn't open the door, 659 00:33:11,709 --> 00:33:12,792 because of your hands? 660 00:33:14,667 --> 00:33:17,709 Mrs. McCluskey, do you have anyone 661 00:33:17,709 --> 00:33:22,000 that could help you out -- a relative, a friend? 662 00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,334 I'm fine. 663 00:33:24,375 --> 00:33:31,667 Okay. Okay. 664 00:33:33,709 --> 00:33:35,334 Before you go... 665 00:33:35,334 --> 00:33:38,000 Open these, would you? And -- and put out the pills. 666 00:33:41,083 --> 00:33:42,042 Yeah. 667 00:33:42,042 --> 00:33:44,250 And don't get your hands all over them. 668 00:33:44,250 --> 00:33:46,125 God knows what your kids have picked up. 669 00:33:46,125 --> 00:33:47,751 Last thing I need's a case of pinkeye. 670 00:33:48,751 --> 00:33:51,751 You're a piece of work. you know that? 671 00:33:52,292 --> 00:33:53,792 Well, this is crazy. 672 00:33:53,792 --> 00:33:55,250 Why'd they give you childproof caps? 673 00:33:55,250 --> 00:33:57,626 First thing tomorrow, I'm taking you to the pharmacy, 674 00:33:57,626 --> 00:33:59,000 and we'll get you new bottles. 675 00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:01,792 Don't do me any favors. You don't even like me. 676 00:34:01,792 --> 00:34:04,375 I don't want you doing anything because you feel obligated. 677 00:34:04,375 --> 00:34:07,751 Let me tell you something. half of life is obligations. 678 00:34:07,751 --> 00:34:09,459 You don't want to go to your husband's 679 00:34:09,459 --> 00:34:11,584 company Christmas party, but you do. 680 00:34:11,584 --> 00:34:12,876 You don't want to sell candy 681 00:34:12,876 --> 00:34:15,501 So your kid's band can buy piccolos, but you do it. 682 00:34:15,501 --> 00:34:17,459 You attend your third cousin's wedding. 683 00:34:17,459 --> 00:34:18,918 You pick up the dry cleaning. 684 00:34:18,918 --> 00:34:21,042 That's life --it's obligations. 685 00:34:21,667 --> 00:34:24,000 And you are now my obligation, 686 00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:25,834 So tomorrow morning, I'll pick you up, 687 00:34:25,834 --> 00:34:26,792 and we'll go to the pharmacy. 688 00:34:26,792 --> 00:34:30,000 Gee, I'm touched by your outpouring of compassion. 689 00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:31,709 We don't have to be friends. 690 00:34:32,792 --> 00:34:34,459 But we're two human beings 691 00:34:34,459 --> 00:34:36,959 Living on the same piece of earth. 692 00:34:36,959 --> 00:34:38,334 We can at least try 693 00:34:38,334 --> 00:34:39,751 And help each other out once in a while. 694 00:34:43,751 --> 00:34:46,417 And you know what? 695 00:34:50,125 --> 00:34:51,709 I am going to take this. 696 00:34:53,167 --> 00:34:54,375 Fine. 697 00:34:54,751 --> 00:34:56,125 I'll see you tomorrow morning. 698 00:34:56,125 --> 00:34:58,375 Pick me up a at 9:00. 699 00:35:06,959 --> 00:35:09,042 Andrew, come here. I want you to see this. 700 00:35:11,501 --> 00:35:14,542 Um, what are you looking at? 701 00:35:14,542 --> 00:35:17,834 I'm looking at your baby pictures. 702 00:35:17,834 --> 00:35:19,626 Look at that one. 703 00:35:19,626 --> 00:35:23,250 How old was I there? 704 00:35:23,250 --> 00:35:25,000 Just 4 weeks old. 705 00:35:33,918 --> 00:35:36,501 I never told you this, but when I gave birth to you, 706 00:35:36,501 --> 00:35:39,042 there were complications. 707 00:35:39,042 --> 00:35:43,083 The umbilical cord wrapped around your neck, 708 00:35:43,083 --> 00:35:44,542 and you stopped breathing. 709 00:35:44,542 --> 00:35:46,751 The room got very quiet, 710 00:35:46,751 --> 00:35:49,042 and I knew you were in trouble. 711 00:35:50,375 --> 00:35:53,000 So I turned to the doctor, and I very calmly said 712 00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:54,417 that he was not to worry about me, 713 00:35:54,417 --> 00:35:57,250 that his job was to save your life. 714 00:35:57,250 --> 00:36:00,083 When I say I would die for you, 715 00:36:00,083 --> 00:36:03,667 that's not an expression. 716 00:36:04,417 --> 00:36:06,626 I mean it. 717 00:36:06,626 --> 00:36:09,626 Yeah, well, uh... 718 00:36:09,626 --> 00:36:13,042 I'm going to go eat my sandwich. 719 00:36:13,584 --> 00:36:17,626 Andrew, please, just go and talk to Reverend Sikes. 720 00:36:17,626 --> 00:36:18,417 Oh, for god's sakes -- 721 00:36:18,417 --> 00:36:20,542 He can counsel you. It can help. 722 00:36:20,542 --> 00:36:23,834 Mom, I don't need any help, all right? I'm fine. 723 00:36:25,083 --> 00:36:26,584 Why do you keep going on about this? 724 00:36:26,584 --> 00:36:28,417 Because if you don't change who you are, 725 00:36:28,417 --> 00:36:29,834 Then you won't go to heaven. 726 00:36:34,792 --> 00:36:42,417 You, um... you -- you don't think I-I'll go to heaven? 727 00:36:42,417 --> 00:36:43,876 No, I don't. 728 00:36:45,334 --> 00:36:47,125 And I need you there. 729 00:36:47,125 --> 00:36:49,167 I would be so lonely without you. 730 00:36:54,959 --> 00:37:00,125 Well... then I guess I better go talk to Reverend Sikes. 731 00:37:00,876 --> 00:37:04,501 Oh, Andrew. thank you so much. 732 00:37:04,501 --> 00:37:06,083 You don't know how much that means to me. 733 00:37:12,501 --> 00:37:14,542 Oh, my -- my gosh. 734 00:37:14,542 --> 00:37:16,125 Uh, are you okay? 735 00:37:16,125 --> 00:37:18,375 Oh, yeah, I just, uh, fell down the stairs. 736 00:37:18,375 --> 00:37:20,375 I'm fine. what's up? 737 00:37:20,375 --> 00:37:22,584 Susan still loves you. 738 00:37:23,751 --> 00:37:27,751 Wow, um... okay. 739 00:37:28,542 --> 00:37:31,250 Look, this is not a good time for this conversation. 740 00:37:31,250 --> 00:37:33,375 She just misses you so much. 741 00:37:33,375 --> 00:37:35,167 Sophie, I just found out 742 00:37:35,167 --> 00:37:37,375 that someone I was very close to is dead. 743 00:37:37,375 --> 00:37:39,751 I've really got to figure out what I'm going to do, 744 00:37:39,751 --> 00:37:42,417 so I just don't have time to think about Susan right now. 745 00:37:42,417 --> 00:37:45,751 She's just very, very unhappy, and if you could just -- 746 00:37:45,751 --> 00:37:47,375 I really don't. 747 00:37:47,417 --> 00:37:49,501 I'm sorry. 748 00:38:24,584 --> 00:38:27,584 I won't reveal a word 749 00:38:27,584 --> 00:38:29,959 that's said here today. 750 00:38:30,584 --> 00:38:31,501 Now... 751 00:38:31,501 --> 00:38:33,083 What's on your mind? 752 00:38:35,667 --> 00:38:37,501 Well, here's the thing -- 753 00:38:37,501 --> 00:38:39,083 I lied to my parents. 754 00:38:39,083 --> 00:38:41,001 I'm not gay. 755 00:38:41,334 --> 00:38:42,626 You're not. 756 00:38:42,626 --> 00:38:44,209 Not really. 757 00:38:45,209 --> 00:38:47,334 Look, all I know is 758 00:38:47,334 --> 00:38:49,042 I wanted to get the hell out of that camp, 759 00:38:49,042 --> 00:38:51,751 so I lied to my parents, 760 00:38:51,751 --> 00:38:53,709 and I told them that I was really worried 761 00:38:53,709 --> 00:38:56,042 that I was having feelings for other guys, 762 00:38:56,042 --> 00:38:58,918 and... they did exactly what I wanted them to. 763 00:38:58,918 --> 00:39:01,209 They are such tools. 764 00:39:01,209 --> 00:39:02,876 I'm sorry, just so I'm clear -- 765 00:39:02,876 --> 00:39:06,042 are you a heterosexual or aren't you? 766 00:39:06,042 --> 00:39:08,501 Look... 767 00:39:08,501 --> 00:39:11,501 I love vanilla ice cream, okay? 768 00:39:11,501 --> 00:39:14,375 But every now and then, 769 00:39:14,375 --> 00:39:15,918 I'm probably going to be in the mood for chocolate. 770 00:39:15,918 --> 00:39:17,959 You know what I'm saying? 771 00:39:19,542 --> 00:39:25,959 I do, but god would prefer you stick to the vanilla. 772 00:39:25,959 --> 00:39:27,459 I don't believe in god. 773 00:39:28,167 --> 00:39:29,292 You don't. 774 00:39:29,292 --> 00:39:32,167 No. sorry. 775 00:39:34,250 --> 00:39:36,083 You know, your mother's going to be devastated. 776 00:39:36,083 --> 00:39:38,417 She's been praying so hard for you to change. 777 00:39:38,417 --> 00:39:40,042 Well, that's the good news. 778 00:39:40,042 --> 00:39:43,542 I am going to change --big time. 779 00:39:43,542 --> 00:39:45,167 I-I'm not sure I follow. 780 00:39:49,375 --> 00:39:51,876 You know what my mom said to me last night? 781 00:39:53,083 --> 00:39:55,250 She said she doesn't think m going to heaven. 782 00:39:55,250 --> 00:39:57,584 Can you believe that? 783 00:39:58,459 --> 00:40:01,584 I'm sure she didn't mean to hurt your feelings, 784 00:40:01,584 --> 00:40:05,000 but the only way you can know paradise 785 00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:06,584 is by repenting your sins. 786 00:40:10,459 --> 00:40:11,792 When she said that to me, 787 00:40:11,792 --> 00:40:15,959 suddenly it hit me how I was going to get back at her. 788 00:40:15,959 --> 00:40:17,459 From now on, 789 00:40:17,459 --> 00:40:20,001 I'm going to be so good. 790 00:40:20,001 --> 00:40:22,501 I'm going to eat my vegetables, 791 00:40:22,501 --> 00:40:24,375 I-I'm going to get good grades, 792 00:40:24,375 --> 00:40:26,334 I'm going to say "yes, ma'am" and "no, ma'am. " 793 00:40:26,334 --> 00:40:28,209 I'm going to make her believe 794 00:40:28,209 --> 00:40:32,292 that god has delivered her this little miracle. 795 00:40:32,292 --> 00:40:34,834 Until one day, 796 00:40:34,834 --> 00:40:37,000 when she least expects it, 797 00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:40,584 I'm going to do something so awful 798 00:40:40,584 --> 00:40:43,959 it is going to rock her world. 799 00:40:43,959 --> 00:40:47,167 I mean, it is really going to destroy her. 800 00:40:48,876 --> 00:40:53,792 And when that day comes... 801 00:40:53,792 --> 00:40:56,334 I'll know paradise. 802 00:41:09,417 --> 00:41:12,459 Yes, life is a journey, 803 00:41:12,459 --> 00:41:17,292 one that is much better traveled with a companion by our side. 804 00:41:17,292 --> 00:41:21,918 Of course, that companion can be just about anyone: 805 00:41:21,918 --> 00:41:23,834 Mrs. McCluskey! 806 00:41:25,125 --> 00:41:27,209 We're going to be late for the doctor. 807 00:41:27,209 --> 00:41:29,459 a neighbor on the other side of the street... 808 00:41:29,459 --> 00:41:32,292 I'm coming. Jeez, hold your water. 809 00:41:34,125 --> 00:41:36,209 There you go. 810 00:41:37,417 --> 00:41:38,542 No more post-nup. 811 00:41:38,542 --> 00:41:41,083 or the man on the other side of the bed. 812 00:41:47,584 --> 00:41:51,375 The companion can be a mother with good intentions... 813 00:41:51,375 --> 00:41:53,542 Thank you for a wonderful service, Reverend. 814 00:41:53,542 --> 00:41:54,876 Thank you so much, Bree. 815 00:41:56,042 --> 00:41:57,792 Or a child who's up to no good. 816 00:41:57,792 --> 00:42:00,375 Very inspirational. 817 00:42:05,459 --> 00:42:08,959 Still, despite our best intentions, 818 00:42:08,959 --> 00:42:12,167 some of us will lose our companions along the way. 819 00:42:12,167 --> 00:42:17,626 And then the journey becomes unbearable. 820 00:42:21,876 --> 00:42:22,501 You see, 821 00:42:22,501 --> 00:42:26,042 Human beings are designed for many things, 822 00:42:27,083 --> 00:42:32,501 But loneliness isn't one of them. 823 00:42:32,583 --> 00:42:33,501 Sync -- ytet duanyz