1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:05,266 --> 00:00:07,790 [waves crashing] 3 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 4 00:00:36,906 --> 00:00:38,212 [Isabella] People always ask me to explain 5 00:00:38,386 --> 00:00:40,040 the details of my abuse. 6 00:00:41,911 --> 00:00:45,262 But this story isn't about those specifics. 7 00:00:45,436 --> 00:00:49,049 This is a story about healing, a story about freedom, 8 00:00:49,223 --> 00:00:51,007 a story about my journey 9 00:00:51,181 --> 00:00:53,923 to find purpose beyond pain. 10 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:01,844 [emotional orchestral music plays] 11 00:01:12,550 --> 00:01:15,205 I just remember looking up at the popcorn ceiling 12 00:01:15,379 --> 00:01:18,252 and just trying to count the stars. 13 00:01:18,426 --> 00:01:22,430 ♪ 14 00:01:36,008 --> 00:01:37,880 I didn't really know what was happening. 15 00:01:46,541 --> 00:01:48,456 I didn't understand what I was feeling. 16 00:01:55,985 --> 00:01:58,379 There was nobody that I could talk to. 17 00:02:06,909 --> 00:02:08,693 So I just didn't want to live anymore. 18 00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:18,138 It's still difficult. 19 00:02:27,016 --> 00:02:28,409 The first thing you think 20 00:02:28,583 --> 00:02:29,497 is that you're the only person... 21 00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:32,456 but you're not. 22 00:02:35,329 --> 00:02:37,287 I just want to take all the girls... 23 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:40,290 help them... 24 00:02:40,464 --> 00:02:43,902 be there for them, and I want them to know 25 00:02:44,076 --> 00:02:45,295 that they're not alone. 26 00:02:45,469 --> 00:02:50,518 ♪ 27 00:03:05,315 --> 00:03:07,665 [music fades] 28 00:03:28,643 --> 00:03:29,818 [Isabella] They always spoil me. 29 00:03:29,992 --> 00:03:31,341 So, every time I'm here, 30 00:03:31,515 --> 00:03:32,864 -I'm always getting spoiled. -Yeah. 31 00:03:33,038 --> 00:03:34,170 [Isabella] I'm always taken care of, 32 00:03:34,344 --> 00:03:36,259 because I'm the youngest and... 33 00:03:37,173 --> 00:03:38,827 -[Anthony] Yeah, she-- -I'm really special. 34 00:03:39,001 --> 00:03:41,699 -[Anthony] Yeah. -[both laugh] 35 00:03:41,873 --> 00:03:44,180 [Anthony] We try to make her life easy. 36 00:03:44,354 --> 00:03:45,747 I mean, she'll lay on the couch 37 00:03:45,921 --> 00:03:48,706 and we'll bring her food, coffee, drinks. 38 00:03:50,882 --> 00:03:52,275 So we're making, uh... 39 00:03:54,321 --> 00:03:56,801 spaghetti, so-- 40 00:03:56,975 --> 00:03:58,847 We always have spaghetti. That's, like-- 41 00:03:59,021 --> 00:04:01,371 You know, it's-- everybody can eat it, 42 00:04:01,545 --> 00:04:03,547 everybody likes it, it's filling. 43 00:04:03,721 --> 00:04:05,941 Oh, yeah, do me a favor, turn on the oven. 44 00:04:09,727 --> 00:04:11,512 [Isabella] So, my other brothers, um, 45 00:04:11,686 --> 00:04:14,689 one lives in New York, so he's never here, 46 00:04:14,863 --> 00:04:16,908 um, only on, like, Christmas. 47 00:04:17,082 --> 00:04:20,521 And then the other one lives in Taiwan, 48 00:04:20,695 --> 00:04:22,392 so he just moved there. 49 00:04:22,871 --> 00:04:25,090 And the other one has a family, 50 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,658 so he's always really busy. 51 00:04:31,009 --> 00:04:32,881 [Anthony] You know, certain people are born 52 00:04:33,055 --> 00:04:34,883 with a certain quality. 53 00:04:35,057 --> 00:04:37,102 Hers was she was always a happy kid. 54 00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,670 [lighthearted music playing] 55 00:04:48,070 --> 00:04:50,551 [Isabella] I knew who I was at such a young age. 56 00:04:52,988 --> 00:04:54,294 I was so free, 57 00:04:54,468 --> 00:04:57,209 outgoing, goofy. 58 00:04:58,167 --> 00:05:00,169 I was just very expressive. 59 00:05:00,343 --> 00:05:02,345 I would always kind of say what's on my mind, 60 00:05:02,519 --> 00:05:03,999 so I was definitely sassy. 61 00:05:04,956 --> 00:05:06,436 [exhales] 62 00:05:07,481 --> 00:05:10,832 [Anthony] Elizabeth was always bouncing around. 63 00:05:11,006 --> 00:05:12,486 Ever since she was little. 64 00:05:12,660 --> 00:05:13,661 She'd jump, she'd be going up and down, 65 00:05:13,835 --> 00:05:15,402 up and down, constantly. 66 00:05:16,751 --> 00:05:18,056 [Isabella] Having three older brothers, 67 00:05:18,230 --> 00:05:19,536 they definitely made me really tough. 68 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:24,106 We would always wrestle with each other, play games. 69 00:05:25,194 --> 00:05:26,891 [Chris] She was always clowning around, 70 00:05:27,065 --> 00:05:28,545 she was always laughing. 71 00:05:28,719 --> 00:05:30,373 -The what? -Running man. 72 00:05:30,547 --> 00:05:31,809 -[Isabella] Oh, the running man. -[Anthony] You know 73 00:05:31,983 --> 00:05:33,463 -the running man? -[Chris] Yeah. 74 00:05:33,637 --> 00:05:34,334 [Anthony] She would do that constantly. 75 00:05:37,467 --> 00:05:39,774 First thing I wanted to be when I grew up 76 00:05:39,948 --> 00:05:42,080 was a WWE fighter, 77 00:05:42,254 --> 00:05:45,736 but it just didn't happen. [laughs] 78 00:05:45,910 --> 00:05:48,609 Um, a dancer, of course. 79 00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:55,703 I was three years old, when I got into dancing. 80 00:05:56,181 --> 00:05:58,488 I would always be in front of the classroom. 81 00:05:58,662 --> 00:06:01,056 I was definitely that kid that always wanted to learn 82 00:06:01,230 --> 00:06:03,841 in front with the teacher, 83 00:06:04,015 --> 00:06:06,278 always try to assist him. 84 00:06:07,105 --> 00:06:10,152 I loved to put on shows for my parents. 85 00:06:10,326 --> 00:06:13,024 I would make my brother, Joseph, 86 00:06:13,198 --> 00:06:14,374 be in it. 87 00:06:17,028 --> 00:06:18,726 He was not a dancer, 88 00:06:18,900 --> 00:06:20,858 but I would make him be a part of my show, 89 00:06:21,032 --> 00:06:22,730 because I didn't really have that many friends. 90 00:06:26,211 --> 00:06:27,561 And it was just so much fun. 91 00:06:27,735 --> 00:06:30,433 Like, being the creative director, 92 00:06:30,607 --> 00:06:34,176 the choreographer, and then obviously in it. 93 00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:39,573 Those were, like, the best memories that I had. 94 00:06:41,923 --> 00:06:44,882 [Anthony] But, really, I say she was the happiest kid 95 00:06:45,056 --> 00:06:47,145 up until she was 12-years-old. [laughs] 96 00:06:52,499 --> 00:06:54,936 [Isabella] The change in me just kind of progressed 97 00:06:55,110 --> 00:06:56,328 a little by little. 98 00:06:57,982 --> 00:07:01,595 But I became more closed off, especially in dance class. 99 00:07:02,204 --> 00:07:04,772 The little girl who would be in front of the classroom 100 00:07:04,946 --> 00:07:07,731 became the girl in the back of the classroom. 101 00:07:09,516 --> 00:07:12,301 I was first sexually abused at five years old, 102 00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:14,651 and it was by a family friend. 103 00:07:15,696 --> 00:07:16,871 The first time I was sexually abused, 104 00:07:17,045 --> 00:07:19,003 I don't really remember. 105 00:07:19,787 --> 00:07:21,266 I didn't really know what was happening. 106 00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:23,573 I didn't understand what I was feeling. 107 00:07:24,792 --> 00:07:28,143 I remember the one time when I was seven years old, 108 00:07:28,317 --> 00:07:31,320 where I was in Texas with my mom and she left me 109 00:07:31,494 --> 00:07:34,323 at this person's house and they had a son 110 00:07:34,497 --> 00:07:37,935 and a daughter, teenage-- like, young teenagers. 111 00:07:38,109 --> 00:07:39,981 And I went to go play with them in their room, 112 00:07:40,155 --> 00:07:43,463 and they abused me, and they abused me really bad. 113 00:07:43,637 --> 00:07:45,508 And that abuse I remember the most, 114 00:07:45,682 --> 00:07:47,902 because it was-- they were very mean to me 115 00:07:48,076 --> 00:07:49,381 and they said that they would hurt me 116 00:07:49,556 --> 00:07:50,731 if I didn't do what they said. 117 00:07:52,646 --> 00:07:55,910 I still go through those emotions a lot. 118 00:07:57,912 --> 00:07:59,479 That's still difficult. 119 00:08:05,267 --> 00:08:09,314 ♪ 120 00:08:17,235 --> 00:08:20,543 [Isabella] My goal is to overcome 121 00:08:20,717 --> 00:08:21,979 the sexual abuse. 122 00:08:22,937 --> 00:08:25,069 To get stronger every single day. 123 00:08:27,419 --> 00:08:30,379 When I was in dance class, 124 00:08:30,553 --> 00:08:33,991 I just loved the way the music felt. 125 00:08:34,165 --> 00:08:35,602 I loved feeling free, 126 00:08:35,776 --> 00:08:38,430 letting the music take over my body. 127 00:08:39,867 --> 00:08:42,260 This is mine. It's not anybody else's. 128 00:08:44,262 --> 00:08:47,352 Dance is a therapy to me. 129 00:08:48,353 --> 00:08:50,442 I think it connects 130 00:08:50,617 --> 00:08:52,880 your soul with your spirit 131 00:08:53,054 --> 00:08:56,274 and your mind, and everything just connects. 132 00:08:56,448 --> 00:09:01,453 [inspiring music plays] 133 00:09:01,628 --> 00:09:03,238 I started working with 134 00:09:03,412 --> 00:09:05,936 a woman-empowered organization... 135 00:09:07,764 --> 00:09:10,593 because I really wanted to be a part of, like, a sisterhood. 136 00:09:11,768 --> 00:09:13,640 I just really wanted to expand 137 00:09:13,814 --> 00:09:15,293 my network in that area. 138 00:09:16,425 --> 00:09:18,340 And working with that organization, 139 00:09:18,514 --> 00:09:20,995 I saw how they were running a nonprofit. 140 00:09:21,169 --> 00:09:22,692 They knew that I was a dancer, 141 00:09:22,866 --> 00:09:24,476 so they would connect me with other nonprofits, 142 00:09:24,651 --> 00:09:26,783 that I would go teach dance to these young girls 143 00:09:26,957 --> 00:09:28,393 and mentor them. 144 00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:31,135 It was just so wonderful that I felt, like, 145 00:09:31,309 --> 00:09:32,484 an instant connection. 146 00:09:32,659 --> 00:09:34,051 And I was like, "You know what? 147 00:09:34,225 --> 00:09:37,228 I think I can start my own nonprofit." 148 00:09:54,637 --> 00:09:55,769 [Isabella] So She-Is. 149 00:09:55,943 --> 00:09:57,727 We teach dance to survivors 150 00:09:57,901 --> 00:09:59,990 of sexual abuse and sex trafficking. 151 00:10:00,164 --> 00:10:01,818 -[Erin] Like this? -[Isabella] Oh, yeah. 152 00:10:01,992 --> 00:10:04,647 We held each other like this in the one we just did. 153 00:10:04,821 --> 00:10:06,823 Um, tendu,was that right? 154 00:10:06,997 --> 00:10:08,346 Yes. 155 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:10,522 We'll do relevé. 156 00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:12,655 [Isabella] There you go, whoo! 157 00:10:12,829 --> 00:10:16,528 [laughter and chatter] 158 00:10:22,578 --> 00:10:24,798 [Isabella] Originally, we were only teaching in LA, 159 00:10:24,972 --> 00:10:26,843 San Diego, San Francisco, 160 00:10:27,017 --> 00:10:30,934 Palm Springs, and New York, but we really found ourselves 161 00:10:31,108 --> 00:10:33,981 wanting to spend more time with the girls 162 00:10:34,155 --> 00:10:37,419 than the shelters had allowed us in the US. 163 00:10:37,593 --> 00:10:39,247 So we knew that 164 00:10:39,421 --> 00:10:41,292 sex trafficking is a global issue, 165 00:10:41,466 --> 00:10:43,512 so we decided to do mission trips. 166 00:10:43,686 --> 00:10:44,818 [woman] Slide. 167 00:10:44,992 --> 00:10:46,558 [Isabella] [indistinct] 168 00:10:46,733 --> 00:10:48,212 -Oh, here. -[Isabella] Uh-huh. 169 00:10:49,387 --> 00:10:52,129 [Isabella] When we work abroad we can spend more time 170 00:10:52,303 --> 00:10:54,131 building relationship with the girls. 171 00:10:54,305 --> 00:10:58,962 That access is so important and very hard to find in the US. 172 00:10:59,136 --> 00:11:01,661 So today we concentrate on working internationally 173 00:11:01,835 --> 00:11:04,185 and travel to Southeast Asia every year. 174 00:11:06,274 --> 00:11:08,232 It's the one thing that... 175 00:11:09,494 --> 00:11:12,323 I could express without having to say anything 176 00:11:12,497 --> 00:11:14,151 and made me feel good, 177 00:11:14,325 --> 00:11:16,719 and even though I was a kid, I was shy on stage. 178 00:11:16,893 --> 00:11:19,374 I was, like, just a different person. 179 00:11:19,548 --> 00:11:22,464 So when I met Isabella and knew that she wanted to 180 00:11:22,638 --> 00:11:26,250 start this nonprofit, I was all for it 181 00:11:26,424 --> 00:11:29,558 to use dance to help change people's lives. 182 00:11:29,732 --> 00:11:31,255 Um... 183 00:11:31,429 --> 00:11:34,345 I was like, "Oh, let's do this." [laughs] 184 00:11:34,519 --> 00:11:37,609 So, we're gonna teach 33 girls. 185 00:11:37,784 --> 00:11:39,742 They're really excited to have us. 186 00:11:39,916 --> 00:11:42,440 We will be working with Destiny Rescue. 187 00:11:42,614 --> 00:11:45,052 Um, they rescue girls 188 00:11:45,226 --> 00:11:47,315 from brothels and, 189 00:11:47,489 --> 00:11:49,012 you know, they educate them. 190 00:11:49,186 --> 00:11:50,622 They have housing for them. 191 00:11:50,797 --> 00:11:52,276 They teach them, you know, 192 00:11:52,450 --> 00:11:54,496 how to sew, how to do hair, 193 00:11:54,670 --> 00:11:57,238 stuff that they can do where-- once they leave 194 00:11:57,412 --> 00:12:00,720 the organization, they can, you know, start a life. 195 00:12:03,026 --> 00:12:07,683 ♪ 196 00:12:07,857 --> 00:12:09,990 [Isabella] We split the classes up in two groups, 197 00:12:11,165 --> 00:12:13,428 the morning class and the evening class. 198 00:12:13,602 --> 00:12:16,648 And we teach them two routines 199 00:12:16,823 --> 00:12:18,738 the first week, and then, like, 200 00:12:18,912 --> 00:12:20,870 the second week, we teach a routine for them together. 201 00:12:21,044 --> 00:12:24,395 And then we put on the performance for the staff, 202 00:12:24,569 --> 00:12:26,746 the social workers, the people 203 00:12:26,920 --> 00:12:29,574 who live at the organization. 204 00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:45,329 [traffic din] 205 00:12:50,508 --> 00:12:52,336 I just wanna be there and support them 206 00:12:52,510 --> 00:12:54,469 and know that they're not alone because the first thing 207 00:12:54,643 --> 00:12:56,732 you think is that you're the only person. 208 00:12:57,689 --> 00:12:59,082 But you're not. 209 00:13:08,700 --> 00:13:10,615 [Isabella] Morning. Hi. 210 00:13:11,573 --> 00:13:13,662 -[Shawna] Hello! -[Isabella] How are you? 211 00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:15,229 -[Todd] Good. I'm Todd. -[Isabella] Hi, Todd. 212 00:13:15,403 --> 00:13:16,839 [Shawna] Hi, I'm Shawna. 213 00:13:17,013 --> 00:13:18,232 [Todd] Shawna, nice to meet you. 214 00:13:18,406 --> 00:13:20,408 -[Todd] Morning. -[Isabella] Hello. 215 00:13:20,582 --> 00:13:22,236 -Hi, how are you? -[Isabella] Good. 216 00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,542 -[Todd laughing] -[Isabella] We're excited too. 217 00:13:26,631 --> 00:13:29,199 [Todd speaking words on screen] 218 00:13:29,373 --> 00:13:30,897 [Isabella] Okay. 219 00:13:31,071 --> 00:13:32,681 [Todd speaking words on screen] 220 00:14:02,972 --> 00:14:05,105 Then went off the beaten path and, like-- 221 00:14:05,279 --> 00:14:06,846 [indistinct]. 222 00:14:09,326 --> 00:14:11,328 -This is great. -Yeah. 223 00:14:13,678 --> 00:14:16,333 Our organization does a lot of different things. 224 00:14:21,382 --> 00:14:24,820 We do rescue, we do after care, and then we help 225 00:14:24,994 --> 00:14:26,778 with reintegration and follow up with those girls 226 00:14:26,953 --> 00:14:28,171 who come into our care. 227 00:14:29,912 --> 00:14:32,610 We have different guys that will go in and work with 228 00:14:32,784 --> 00:14:35,439 police, undercover agents that go and work with 229 00:14:35,613 --> 00:14:37,485 the government to be able to go into 230 00:14:37,659 --> 00:14:41,576 different karaoke bars or beer gardens or brothels, 231 00:14:41,750 --> 00:14:44,231 depending on the country that we're working within. 232 00:14:47,147 --> 00:14:50,324 So our main focus is girls under the age of 18. 233 00:14:51,716 --> 00:14:53,675 We usually do more short-term living so that 234 00:14:53,849 --> 00:14:55,068 they can get the counseling that they need, 235 00:14:55,242 --> 00:14:57,026 they can work with a social worker, 236 00:14:57,200 --> 00:14:58,723 they can get training outside of it, 237 00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:00,595 and start attending schools again 238 00:15:00,769 --> 00:15:02,597 if that's something that they would like to do. 239 00:15:02,771 --> 00:15:04,555 And we help move them into 240 00:15:04,729 --> 00:15:06,688 a completely different field and find the education for that 241 00:15:06,862 --> 00:15:09,952 so they could go into something that's better for them. 242 00:15:12,215 --> 00:15:14,609 We will provide whatever it is that the girls need. 243 00:15:14,783 --> 00:15:16,350 So when they first come, it's, 244 00:15:16,524 --> 00:15:18,787 like, medical exams, counseling. 245 00:15:18,961 --> 00:15:21,355 They'll meet with career counselors. 246 00:15:21,529 --> 00:15:23,487 Uh, we have teachers here that are offered to them. 247 00:15:23,661 --> 00:15:25,794 So, there are all sorts of different programs. 248 00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:30,581 When a girl comes into our care, 249 00:15:30,755 --> 00:15:32,844 there is a lot of, 250 00:15:33,019 --> 00:15:34,716 just emptiness in them. 251 00:15:34,890 --> 00:15:36,370 They don't really interact well with the other girls, 252 00:15:36,544 --> 00:15:38,633 they kind of sit by themselves a little bit. 253 00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:42,376 They're very withdrawn and they look very sad. 254 00:15:43,116 --> 00:15:45,466 We have had lots of girls that have had nightmares. 255 00:15:45,640 --> 00:15:48,251 There is a lot of PTSD that comes with this. 256 00:15:48,425 --> 00:15:51,994 There's a program called Empower that we go through 257 00:15:52,168 --> 00:15:55,389 and that is what they use with children soldiers in Kenya. 258 00:15:55,563 --> 00:15:58,218 It is a great program that kind of allows even girls 259 00:15:58,392 --> 00:16:00,176 to understand that what they're feeling 260 00:16:00,350 --> 00:16:01,743 and things that they're experiencing 261 00:16:01,917 --> 00:16:04,572 comes from those places of trauma. 262 00:16:04,746 --> 00:16:06,530 Okay, so we'll start with introductions. 263 00:16:07,444 --> 00:16:10,317 So maybe we could go around in a circle and say our names, 264 00:16:10,491 --> 00:16:11,622 you guys can say where you're from. 265 00:16:11,796 --> 00:16:13,450 [Isabella] Hi. 266 00:16:13,624 --> 00:16:16,932 My name is Isabella or, this will be easier, Bella. 267 00:16:17,106 --> 00:16:18,368 [kids] Hi, Bella. 268 00:16:18,890 --> 00:16:20,109 Yeah, I love it. 269 00:16:20,762 --> 00:16:23,983 Um, we are from the United States. 270 00:16:24,157 --> 00:16:25,593 From California. 271 00:16:26,637 --> 00:16:27,987 California. 272 00:16:28,161 --> 00:16:30,119 Um, my-- we're gonna say 273 00:16:30,293 --> 00:16:32,339 what is our favorite thing to do. 274 00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:35,211 Okay? 275 00:16:36,082 --> 00:16:39,911 So, my favorite thing to do is dance. 276 00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:42,697 [translator speaks foreign language] 277 00:16:49,704 --> 00:16:51,053 [Isabella] You like dance, too? 278 00:16:53,316 --> 00:16:55,144 Who-- who-- who do you like to dance to? 279 00:16:55,318 --> 00:16:56,406 What music? 280 00:16:56,580 --> 00:16:59,583 [girl speaks foreign language] 281 00:16:59,757 --> 00:17:01,933 [Isabella] Ballet? Okay, we'll do ballet! 282 00:17:02,108 --> 00:17:05,067 -[Holly] I used to do ballet. -[Isabella] Really? 283 00:17:05,241 --> 00:17:08,375 [Holly] My name is Holly and I like music. 284 00:17:08,549 --> 00:17:11,726 -[Isabella] Music? -Okay. My name's Jordan. 285 00:17:11,900 --> 00:17:13,510 -[Isabella] Hi, Jordan. -[Jordan] Hi, guys. 286 00:17:13,684 --> 00:17:16,948 And I love animals and dancing. 287 00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:19,342 -[kids] Aw. -Animals always. 288 00:17:19,908 --> 00:17:22,215 [Isabella] So, we're so excited to be here. 289 00:17:22,389 --> 00:17:24,826 Oh, you guys are all taking the dance class with us? 290 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:26,828 [girls speak foreign language] 291 00:17:27,002 --> 00:17:29,178 -[girls cheering and applauding] -[Isabella] Yes, I love that! 292 00:17:31,485 --> 00:17:33,791 [translator 2 speaks foreign language] 293 00:17:33,965 --> 00:17:37,360 [Isabella] Say thank you, knees, for everything they can do. 294 00:17:41,712 --> 00:17:43,975 Thighs! I love my thighs. 295 00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:47,066 [Shawna] I'm an incest survivor myself. 296 00:17:48,589 --> 00:17:52,288 When you've been abused... 297 00:17:53,681 --> 00:17:57,554 like, you actually leave your body. 298 00:17:58,990 --> 00:18:00,427 Like, it's like you're kind of just living 299 00:18:00,601 --> 00:18:04,387 in your mind and you stop feeling your body. 300 00:18:05,345 --> 00:18:06,650 [Isabella] Thank you, heart, 301 00:18:06,824 --> 00:18:09,958 for letting me love myself fully. 302 00:18:10,132 --> 00:18:12,091 [translator 2 speaks foreign language] 303 00:18:12,265 --> 00:18:13,962 [Shawna] Meditation is good. 304 00:18:14,136 --> 00:18:15,224 All of these things that kind of 305 00:18:15,398 --> 00:18:17,879 get you back into feeling. 306 00:18:18,053 --> 00:18:21,752 It allows you to get grounded. And you can feel your feet. 307 00:18:21,926 --> 00:18:25,191 You can feel your fingers. You can feel the arms. 308 00:18:26,801 --> 00:18:29,412 [indistinct chatter] 309 00:18:33,242 --> 00:18:35,897 [cheering and applause] 310 00:18:42,643 --> 00:18:44,297 [Shawna] Just watch. Don't do, just watch. 311 00:18:44,471 --> 00:18:46,168 Yeah? Just watch. 312 00:18:46,342 --> 00:18:48,039 [translator 2 speaks foreign language] 313 00:18:48,214 --> 00:18:50,433 Right. Swing. 314 00:18:50,999 --> 00:18:53,349 [indistinct] Turn. 315 00:18:53,958 --> 00:18:57,919 [indistinct] Over-swing. And then repeat back. 316 00:18:58,093 --> 00:18:59,877 -[woman speaks foreign language] -[Shawna] Turn. 317 00:19:00,051 --> 00:19:03,707 [indistinct chatter] 318 00:19:03,881 --> 00:19:05,709 [Shawna] And it's interesting 319 00:19:05,883 --> 00:19:07,624 because, like, whenever I watch videos of myself as a child, 320 00:19:07,798 --> 00:19:10,975 like, I literally had, like, no control over my limbs. 321 00:19:12,194 --> 00:19:13,848 But I think that's my trauma. 322 00:19:14,022 --> 00:19:15,937 [Shawna] We're gonna just-- Ready? 323 00:19:28,732 --> 00:19:30,430 When it comes to dance, 324 00:19:30,604 --> 00:19:33,215 it's just the ability to-- to close your eyes 325 00:19:33,389 --> 00:19:35,826 and to feel the music 326 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:37,654 and to just move. 327 00:19:38,742 --> 00:19:41,354 And, again, you don't have to say anything. 328 00:19:44,226 --> 00:19:46,228 It's just body language. 329 00:19:46,402 --> 00:19:48,622 [upbeat music playing] 330 00:20:34,537 --> 00:20:38,237 ♪ 331 00:20:45,592 --> 00:20:48,290 [all cheering] 332 00:20:58,474 --> 00:20:59,780 [Jordan] High-five. 333 00:20:59,954 --> 00:21:02,261 High-five! [whooping] 334 00:21:02,435 --> 00:21:03,566 High-five for you. 335 00:21:05,264 --> 00:21:07,657 [Isabella] Okay, so our first class. 336 00:21:07,831 --> 00:21:10,878 How did you guys feel? I mean, it's your first time. 337 00:21:11,052 --> 00:21:12,619 [Erin] Yeah. 338 00:21:12,793 --> 00:21:14,142 -[Shawna] It was fun. -[Isabella] It was fun? 339 00:21:14,316 --> 00:21:15,883 -[Shawna] So much fun. -[Erin] Yeah. 340 00:21:16,057 --> 00:21:17,667 -The girls are so open... -[Isabella] Mm-hmm. 341 00:21:17,841 --> 00:21:20,583 -...and loving and affectionate. -Yeah. 342 00:21:20,757 --> 00:21:22,411 They picked up the choreography very quickly. 343 00:21:22,585 --> 00:21:23,760 -[Jordan] Yeah! -[Shawna] So fast! 344 00:21:23,934 --> 00:21:25,719 [Jordan] I was surprised. 345 00:21:25,893 --> 00:21:27,677 I was very impressed with that, how focused they were. 346 00:21:27,851 --> 00:21:29,331 I think they felt really safe with us, 347 00:21:29,505 --> 00:21:30,680 which was a good feeling. 348 00:21:31,855 --> 00:21:33,683 [Isabella] It's like there's automatic trust 349 00:21:33,857 --> 00:21:35,772 and safety when they see us here. 350 00:21:36,338 --> 00:21:37,992 How do you feel about today? 351 00:21:38,166 --> 00:21:41,735 I feel great. I love it. I love teaching. 352 00:21:41,909 --> 00:21:44,433 I love it so much. 353 00:21:45,086 --> 00:21:47,262 [all] Go, She-Is! 354 00:21:47,436 --> 00:21:48,655 [Shawna] Yes! [laughs] 355 00:21:48,829 --> 00:21:51,092 Shawna was like... 356 00:21:51,266 --> 00:21:52,963 [all chattering and laughing] 357 00:21:54,878 --> 00:21:55,879 We're so tired. 358 00:21:56,053 --> 00:22:00,406 ♪ 359 00:22:44,537 --> 00:22:46,669 [Josh] It is happening in every country, 360 00:22:46,843 --> 00:22:48,367 almost in the entire world. 361 00:22:49,846 --> 00:22:52,240 There are many different things that I think contribute to 362 00:22:52,414 --> 00:22:55,330 and help the trafficking industry grow. 363 00:22:56,897 --> 00:22:58,725 When I go out into the community, 364 00:22:58,899 --> 00:23:00,335 a lot of boys under the age of, 365 00:23:00,509 --> 00:23:02,119 say, three or four, are usually naked. 366 00:23:02,293 --> 00:23:04,557 And whenever they throw a fit, 367 00:23:04,731 --> 00:23:07,255 family members, relatives, even neighbors 368 00:23:07,429 --> 00:23:10,040 sometimes will, like, fondle them and touch them. 369 00:23:11,085 --> 00:23:12,739 Because that happening from a young age, 370 00:23:12,913 --> 00:23:14,654 almost shows the men or the boys 371 00:23:14,828 --> 00:23:16,743 like, "Okay, when I'm angry or upset, 372 00:23:16,917 --> 00:23:18,309 like, I need a sexual release." 373 00:23:19,528 --> 00:23:21,356 In Southeast Asia, there are a lot of 374 00:23:21,530 --> 00:23:23,445 different things that have been passed down. 375 00:23:23,619 --> 00:23:25,665 I know there are sayings like, 376 00:23:25,839 --> 00:23:28,494 "Men are like gold and women are like a white cloth. 377 00:23:28,668 --> 00:23:30,974 "If a man loses his purity, you can just wash it off, 378 00:23:31,148 --> 00:23:34,325 "and it's still valuable, where if a girl loses her purity, 379 00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:37,764 then you can never get it to be as clean as it once was." 380 00:23:37,938 --> 00:23:41,550 Once a girl is raped or sold, she feels like, 381 00:23:41,724 --> 00:23:42,943 okay, I'm worthless, I might as well 382 00:23:43,117 --> 00:23:45,119 just go into this line of work. 383 00:23:46,381 --> 00:23:49,428 A lot of things aren't even really talked about, 384 00:23:49,950 --> 00:23:52,082 so they don't bring up the deeper emotions 385 00:23:52,256 --> 00:23:53,867 and the feelings and the things that took place 386 00:23:54,041 --> 00:23:55,521 and happened to them. 387 00:23:55,695 --> 00:23:58,088 So even if a mother experienced a similar thing, 388 00:23:58,262 --> 00:24:00,047 they probably won't even mention it to their daughter. 389 00:24:00,221 --> 00:24:02,049 They won't really mention it to their husband. 390 00:24:02,223 --> 00:24:03,790 They feel like if you bring it up again, 391 00:24:03,964 --> 00:24:06,009 then those emotions can kind of overtake you, 392 00:24:06,183 --> 00:24:08,229 and it's unhealthy to do that. 393 00:24:09,752 --> 00:24:11,275 It's probably the-- 394 00:24:11,450 --> 00:24:12,755 it is the hardest job that I've ever had. 395 00:24:12,929 --> 00:24:14,540 And I'll go and visit these families, 396 00:24:14,714 --> 00:24:16,280 and I'll hear about the loans that they have. 397 00:24:16,455 --> 00:24:19,719 There are times where a grandparent is sick 398 00:24:19,893 --> 00:24:21,503 and in the hospital, and so they really need 399 00:24:21,677 --> 00:24:23,157 money to be able to do it. 400 00:24:23,331 --> 00:24:24,941 And because of that, the daughter is what 401 00:24:25,115 --> 00:24:27,074 they look at as their-- their last hope. 402 00:24:29,163 --> 00:24:31,818 Sometimes, where the family just wants a new TV, 403 00:24:31,992 --> 00:24:34,211 and so they'll sell their daughter. 404 00:24:38,564 --> 00:24:41,131 Oftentimes in southeast Asia, when someone is brought 405 00:24:41,305 --> 00:24:42,872 from a rural area, 406 00:24:43,046 --> 00:24:44,570 they don't know how to get back home anyway. 407 00:24:44,744 --> 00:24:46,615 And sometimes they're brought over borders 408 00:24:46,789 --> 00:24:48,312 to a different place too, 409 00:24:48,487 --> 00:24:49,488 where they can't even speak the language. 410 00:24:49,662 --> 00:24:51,054 So being able to try to talk 411 00:24:51,228 --> 00:24:53,230 to someone isn't really that helpful. 412 00:24:53,404 --> 00:24:56,625 And many times police are even somehow involved. 413 00:24:56,799 --> 00:24:59,498 And so the trust of even going to an authority 414 00:24:59,672 --> 00:25:02,501 like that, they don't really feel like it'll help them. 415 00:25:45,195 --> 00:25:47,458 [Isabella] I've told the story a million times. 416 00:25:47,633 --> 00:25:49,417 -[Erin] I know. -[Shawna] You ready, Bella? 417 00:25:49,591 --> 00:25:51,637 Yeah. Do you wanna-- 418 00:25:51,811 --> 00:25:53,203 I'm gonna sit next to you. 419 00:25:53,943 --> 00:25:56,250 So, the reason 420 00:25:56,424 --> 00:25:59,819 why I started She-Is... 421 00:25:59,993 --> 00:26:03,562 [speaks foreign language] 422 00:26:05,999 --> 00:26:09,829 ...um, because I was, 423 00:26:10,003 --> 00:26:13,920 uh, sexually abused when I was younger. 424 00:26:15,269 --> 00:26:18,489 [translator 1 speaks foreign language] 425 00:26:18,664 --> 00:26:19,665 Um... 426 00:26:19,839 --> 00:26:22,929 and dance was 427 00:26:23,103 --> 00:26:26,889 the only time that I could feel like myself. 428 00:26:27,063 --> 00:26:30,023 [speaks foreign language] 429 00:26:32,025 --> 00:26:36,072 Being abused, you feel like... 430 00:26:37,117 --> 00:26:41,121 you're-- you don't belong, you feel a lot of shame 431 00:26:41,295 --> 00:26:45,255 and, um, worthless 432 00:26:45,429 --> 00:26:48,781 and they took-- they took your body away from you. 433 00:26:49,869 --> 00:26:52,262 I have a lot of 434 00:26:52,436 --> 00:26:54,874 strong family values, 435 00:26:55,701 --> 00:26:57,920 but being sexually abused, 436 00:26:58,094 --> 00:27:01,271 you kind of 437 00:27:01,445 --> 00:27:04,448 really don't believe that anymore. 438 00:27:04,623 --> 00:27:08,278 [speaks foreign language] 439 00:27:10,106 --> 00:27:14,720 Going through my sexual abuse, um... 440 00:27:16,025 --> 00:27:17,287 [clicks tongue] ...I... 441 00:27:18,506 --> 00:27:19,768 wanted to, like... 442 00:27:22,466 --> 00:27:24,555 [voice cracking] ...um, I wanted to, like, 443 00:27:24,730 --> 00:27:26,514 die or commit suicide, 444 00:27:26,688 --> 00:27:29,996 because you feel so alone. 445 00:27:30,910 --> 00:27:34,827 [speaks foreign language] 446 00:27:38,134 --> 00:27:40,528 And you feel like you have nobody 447 00:27:40,702 --> 00:27:43,923 that you can talk to, you don't have your family, 448 00:27:44,097 --> 00:27:46,577 because you-- you lose your family's trust. 449 00:27:48,057 --> 00:27:51,887 [speaks foreign language] 450 00:27:53,323 --> 00:27:55,804 Do they-- do they understand? 451 00:27:55,978 --> 00:27:58,372 Do they-- can they relate to me? 452 00:27:58,546 --> 00:28:01,767 [speaks foreign language] 453 00:28:01,941 --> 00:28:03,725 [girls speak foreign language] 454 00:28:03,899 --> 00:28:06,772 [somber music playing] 455 00:28:09,339 --> 00:28:12,691 [train horn honking] 456 00:28:17,478 --> 00:28:20,133 [train rumbling] 457 00:28:28,228 --> 00:28:29,664 [Isabella] I remember being... 458 00:28:30,796 --> 00:28:33,363 five years old-- five or six, 459 00:28:33,537 --> 00:28:35,365 my dad giving me one of my bunnies-- 460 00:28:35,539 --> 00:28:37,672 I had this bunny that her name was Jessica Rabbit. 461 00:28:37,846 --> 00:28:39,892 And my dad told me to show him 462 00:28:40,066 --> 00:28:42,416 on this stuffed animal what happened. 463 00:28:42,590 --> 00:28:43,896 So when I started describing, 464 00:28:44,070 --> 00:28:46,159 I saw the pain in my dad's eyes 465 00:28:46,333 --> 00:28:50,250 and I just told myself never to tell him ever again. 466 00:28:50,424 --> 00:28:51,991 So I didn't. 467 00:28:56,517 --> 00:28:58,824 I don't really remember what he said to me, 468 00:28:58,998 --> 00:29:00,739 I just remember his eyes. 469 00:29:03,132 --> 00:29:04,655 The more and more I grew up, 470 00:29:04,830 --> 00:29:06,788 like, from seven, 471 00:29:06,962 --> 00:29:09,225 I just felt more alone, 472 00:29:09,399 --> 00:29:11,706 unable to talk to somebody about how I was feeling, 473 00:29:11,880 --> 00:29:13,403 or what I was going through, 474 00:29:13,577 --> 00:29:15,492 and didn't even know how to express myself. 475 00:29:17,668 --> 00:29:20,802 -Okay, here we are. -I know. 476 00:29:20,976 --> 00:29:22,717 So at the end of our last session, 477 00:29:22,891 --> 00:29:24,893 I asked you to keep track of dreams. 478 00:29:25,067 --> 00:29:26,634 Mmm. Yeah. 479 00:29:26,808 --> 00:29:28,810 So, anything happening with respect to that? 480 00:29:29,811 --> 00:29:31,552 I know this sounds harsh, 481 00:29:31,726 --> 00:29:34,381 but I call child sexual abuse 482 00:29:34,555 --> 00:29:36,426 the American national pastime. 483 00:29:37,079 --> 00:29:40,517 That it has replaced baseball. Yeah. [laughs] 484 00:29:40,691 --> 00:29:44,608 As the national pastime, because it is that common. 485 00:29:44,783 --> 00:29:46,262 It's very common with boys, too, 486 00:29:46,436 --> 00:29:47,873 but it's about twice as common with girls, 487 00:29:48,047 --> 00:29:49,265 as it is with boys. 488 00:29:51,441 --> 00:29:54,270 [Isabella] I mean, the first time when I told my parents, 489 00:29:54,444 --> 00:29:56,011 they didn't really do anything, 490 00:29:56,185 --> 00:29:57,491 like, it just continued. 491 00:29:57,665 --> 00:29:58,971 It was just, like, a ripple effect 492 00:29:59,145 --> 00:30:00,842 with other people. 493 00:30:01,016 --> 00:30:04,150 The abuse started with the family friend 494 00:30:04,324 --> 00:30:07,196 at five years old and then, um... 495 00:30:08,023 --> 00:30:10,504 the teenagers in Texas... 496 00:30:11,287 --> 00:30:13,028 and it continued 497 00:30:13,202 --> 00:30:15,901 with my cousin and... 498 00:30:17,119 --> 00:30:19,382 multiple babysitters. 499 00:30:19,556 --> 00:30:21,341 So, from five to 12 years old, 500 00:30:21,515 --> 00:30:23,473 it was seven different people 501 00:30:23,647 --> 00:30:27,086 and it was both men and women. 502 00:30:30,263 --> 00:30:32,308 It hurts that they weren't there for me, 503 00:30:32,482 --> 00:30:33,440 or they didn't protect me. 504 00:30:33,614 --> 00:30:35,094 And I just-- 505 00:30:35,268 --> 00:30:37,313 I wish I never experienced anything of this 506 00:30:37,487 --> 00:30:39,533 and I wouldn't want anybody 507 00:30:39,707 --> 00:30:41,404 to experience what I went through. 508 00:30:41,578 --> 00:30:43,493 Because I was going through so much, 509 00:30:43,667 --> 00:30:46,714 and not having them there for me... 510 00:30:47,671 --> 00:30:49,195 it makes me so sad. 511 00:30:49,978 --> 00:30:51,066 So... 512 00:30:52,372 --> 00:30:54,853 [Maggie] Sometimes after 513 00:30:55,027 --> 00:30:57,420 kids have told their mother 514 00:30:57,594 --> 00:30:59,901 and their mother has not validated them... 515 00:31:00,859 --> 00:31:02,643 then they don't tell anymore 516 00:31:02,817 --> 00:31:04,427 and it just keeps going on. 517 00:31:05,515 --> 00:31:08,170 You can imagine how worthless a girl feels. 518 00:31:09,128 --> 00:31:11,652 So, if a mother was sexually abused as a child, 519 00:31:11,826 --> 00:31:14,655 some are fiercely protective of their children 520 00:31:14,829 --> 00:31:16,309 because they know what can go on. 521 00:31:16,483 --> 00:31:19,355 But others, they became so dispirited 522 00:31:19,529 --> 00:31:21,488 by what happened to them as children, 523 00:31:21,662 --> 00:31:25,318 that they, uh, just think that's part of being a girl. 524 00:31:26,449 --> 00:31:29,104 The more that it happens, the worse it is. 525 00:31:30,018 --> 00:31:31,846 A very important part 526 00:31:32,020 --> 00:31:33,587 of how they're going to feel later, 527 00:31:33,761 --> 00:31:35,981 is how the abuse ended. 528 00:31:36,590 --> 00:31:40,115 So that then, we go back to the child who's abused 529 00:31:40,289 --> 00:31:42,378 in the family or by a neighbor or whatever, 530 00:31:42,552 --> 00:31:44,772 tells their mother, she goes straight to the cops. 531 00:31:44,946 --> 00:31:48,080 The kid knows then, that they have protection. 532 00:31:48,254 --> 00:31:49,690 That's a whole different outcome, 533 00:31:49,864 --> 00:31:52,084 than if something goes on, year after year. 534 00:31:53,259 --> 00:31:55,391 Those long-term things that happen, 535 00:31:55,565 --> 00:31:56,566 change a person. 536 00:31:56,740 --> 00:32:01,832 ♪ 537 00:32:12,887 --> 00:32:14,671 [Isabella] Every time we visit Southeast Asia, 538 00:32:14,845 --> 00:32:18,806 we visit the girls at the brothels or the KTVs. 539 00:32:19,459 --> 00:32:21,591 Um, we just really want to understand 540 00:32:21,765 --> 00:32:23,419 where the girls come from, 541 00:32:23,593 --> 00:32:25,334 really meet with them and connect with them. 542 00:32:25,508 --> 00:32:27,075 -[horn honking] -[Isabella] Rick! 543 00:32:28,207 --> 00:32:30,861 -Hi. -[Rick] Good to see you. 544 00:32:31,036 --> 00:32:32,515 [Isabella] Good to see you. 545 00:32:32,689 --> 00:32:34,387 Can you tell us where we're going? 546 00:32:34,561 --> 00:32:38,391 Uh, we're going to a-- a section of bars. 547 00:32:38,565 --> 00:32:40,306 Uh, they call them KTV Bars. 548 00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:41,742 It's karaoke television. 549 00:32:42,438 --> 00:32:45,398 And it's where people go to buy prostitutes here. 550 00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:48,836 [Rick] My name's Rick. 551 00:32:49,010 --> 00:32:51,012 Um, I was a police officer for 30 years 552 00:32:51,186 --> 00:32:52,622 and prior to that I was in the Marines. 553 00:32:53,449 --> 00:32:55,190 The work I'm in right now is that I work 554 00:32:55,364 --> 00:32:57,758 with trafficked women and what we call women at risk. 555 00:32:57,932 --> 00:32:59,325 Trafficked women are women that 556 00:32:59,499 --> 00:33:00,891 have been forced into prostitution, 557 00:33:01,066 --> 00:33:02,676 either sold, or kidnapped, or raped. 558 00:33:02,850 --> 00:33:06,201 And women at risk are women who are being used, 559 00:33:06,375 --> 00:33:08,682 or abused by their families or relatives in the villages. 560 00:33:08,856 --> 00:33:10,814 And we bring them in to get them out 561 00:33:10,989 --> 00:33:12,773 of that environment and give them a better chance. 562 00:33:13,556 --> 00:33:15,819 The main factor in sex trafficking, 563 00:33:15,994 --> 00:33:18,387 I think, in America and worldwide is economics. 564 00:33:18,561 --> 00:33:20,128 Money. 565 00:33:20,302 --> 00:33:22,261 You know, the most common way in the country 566 00:33:22,435 --> 00:33:25,525 that I currently work in, is against their will, 567 00:33:25,699 --> 00:33:28,571 being sold by families, or kidnapped. 568 00:33:28,745 --> 00:33:30,486 They'll leave the villages wanting a better future. 569 00:33:30,660 --> 00:33:32,836 They'll come to the city and while in the city, 570 00:33:33,011 --> 00:33:35,187 they'll be raped and kidnapped and their-- their culture says 571 00:33:35,361 --> 00:33:36,536 once you've had sex with one person, 572 00:33:36,710 --> 00:33:38,146 you now belong to them. 573 00:33:38,320 --> 00:33:39,756 So, then, they'll become working for them. 574 00:33:39,930 --> 00:33:41,541 And even though the guy may have raped 20 women, 575 00:33:41,715 --> 00:33:43,891 had 20 prostitutes, he calls them all his wives, 576 00:33:44,065 --> 00:33:45,197 and they stay loyal to him. 577 00:33:47,416 --> 00:33:49,853 Over here, there's a big, bad stigma. 578 00:33:50,028 --> 00:33:51,420 This is a very conservative country, 579 00:33:51,594 --> 00:33:53,074 and the girls that are trafficked 580 00:33:53,248 --> 00:33:54,641 are looked down on, they're considered 581 00:33:54,815 --> 00:33:57,165 basically tainted or diseased or unclean. 582 00:33:57,992 --> 00:33:59,472 It'll be hard for them 583 00:33:59,646 --> 00:34:00,951 to ever get a legitimate job after that, 584 00:34:01,126 --> 00:34:01,996 if people know what they've done. 585 00:34:03,171 --> 00:34:05,478 They have all types of medical issues. 586 00:34:05,652 --> 00:34:08,437 And as they get worse off, as they get more abused, 587 00:34:08,611 --> 00:34:11,266 or more beat up, or more diseased, 588 00:34:11,440 --> 00:34:14,356 as it takes its toll on them, they then work themselves down 589 00:34:14,530 --> 00:34:16,402 the economic ladder of prostitution, 590 00:34:16,576 --> 00:34:18,447 to where they're in worse and worse conditions. 591 00:34:21,711 --> 00:34:23,800 The top of the food chain is the bars. 592 00:34:25,367 --> 00:34:27,239 In the bars, it's a party atmosphere. 593 00:34:27,413 --> 00:34:28,979 You're drinking, foreigners there, 594 00:34:29,154 --> 00:34:30,503 you're having fun, you're with your friends, 595 00:34:30,677 --> 00:34:32,374 you're joking, and you have freedoms. 596 00:34:32,548 --> 00:34:33,941 You're allowed to go with the person 597 00:34:34,115 --> 00:34:35,551 to their hotel room with them. 598 00:34:35,725 --> 00:34:37,249 They can buy you for the night, for the week, 599 00:34:37,423 --> 00:34:38,902 and you have a lot of freedom. 600 00:34:39,077 --> 00:34:40,817 Down from there, you go to the KTVs, 601 00:34:40,991 --> 00:34:42,341 the karaoke television bars, 602 00:34:42,515 --> 00:34:44,082 where you're in the house, 603 00:34:44,256 --> 00:34:46,084 you live in the house, you eat in the house. 604 00:34:46,258 --> 00:34:47,781 It's not as-- not a party atmosphere. 605 00:34:47,955 --> 00:34:49,391 You're simply there for a guy to come in 606 00:34:49,565 --> 00:34:50,958 and pick you and choose you and take you. 607 00:34:51,132 --> 00:34:52,829 You make less money 608 00:34:53,003 --> 00:34:54,614 and you're not allowed to leave with them. 609 00:34:54,788 --> 00:34:58,313 You're never allowed to leave the KTV brothel, ever. 610 00:34:58,487 --> 00:34:59,662 And then once you're not good enough 611 00:34:59,836 --> 00:35:01,099 for that anymore, 612 00:35:01,273 --> 00:35:02,187 you're kicked out on the streets. 613 00:35:02,839 --> 00:35:04,885 There's also the subject of frequent rapes. 614 00:35:05,059 --> 00:35:06,669 Because now, she's out there and available 615 00:35:06,843 --> 00:35:07,975 and people are like, "Oh, she does that anyway." 616 00:35:08,149 --> 00:35:09,455 No, she's still being assaulted, 617 00:35:09,629 --> 00:35:10,282 she's still being hurt and abused. 618 00:35:10,456 --> 00:35:14,460 ♪ 619 00:35:37,135 --> 00:35:39,137 [interviewer speaks foreign language] 620 00:35:44,316 --> 00:35:49,059 [speaks foreign language] 621 00:37:01,828 --> 00:37:03,873 [Rick] Most people work in brothels and KTVs 622 00:37:04,047 --> 00:37:05,179 their whole life. 623 00:37:05,701 --> 00:37:07,137 If you're sold into a KTV, 624 00:37:07,312 --> 00:37:09,183 you never really pay off the debt. 625 00:37:09,357 --> 00:37:12,839 Most-- usually I've heard they're sold for about $1,000. 626 00:37:13,013 --> 00:37:15,494 The girl makes about $5... 627 00:37:16,321 --> 00:37:17,322 per customer. 628 00:37:17,496 --> 00:37:18,845 She gets nothing. 629 00:37:19,019 --> 00:37:20,107 The money goes to pay for her food 630 00:37:20,281 --> 00:37:22,022 and living in the KTV. 631 00:37:22,196 --> 00:37:23,806 They could have very well paid it off, 632 00:37:23,980 --> 00:37:25,895 but they're never told, so they work there forever, 633 00:37:26,069 --> 00:37:28,333 until they're not wanted anymore and put out. 634 00:37:28,507 --> 00:37:30,248 So most of these, unless they're rescued, 635 00:37:30,422 --> 00:37:32,032 that's what they'll do for the rest of their life. 636 00:37:32,206 --> 00:37:33,816 Then a lot of them, once they've been there long enough, 637 00:37:33,990 --> 00:37:35,209 become managers, 638 00:37:35,383 --> 00:37:36,993 or start their own prostitution. 639 00:37:37,167 --> 00:37:38,821 Or they'll take their kids and start using them 640 00:37:38,995 --> 00:37:40,388 to make money for them. 641 00:37:40,562 --> 00:37:42,651 So the kids will work as prostitutes 642 00:37:42,825 --> 00:37:45,263 and the mom doesn't have to work as much as prostitutes. 643 00:37:46,786 --> 00:37:50,050 [Lily speaks foreign language] 644 00:38:59,380 --> 00:39:01,643 It shorts out their nervous system almost. 645 00:39:01,817 --> 00:39:03,253 Because little kids, if you think about it, 646 00:39:03,428 --> 00:39:05,168 they have very delicate... 647 00:39:05,908 --> 00:39:07,257 feelings. 648 00:39:07,432 --> 00:39:09,999 So when they're abused, or something, 649 00:39:10,173 --> 00:39:11,914 it's just completely overwhelming. 650 00:39:12,088 --> 00:39:14,613 And what can they do? They just blank it out. 651 00:39:14,787 --> 00:39:17,093 The energy of trauma gets stored in the body. 652 00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:20,096 And so, after that, of course, 653 00:39:20,270 --> 00:39:22,185 the body doesn't work 654 00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:24,884 as well as it would otherwise. 655 00:39:25,058 --> 00:39:27,365 And so that part of the body... 656 00:39:28,235 --> 00:39:29,541 gets less healthy. 657 00:39:29,715 --> 00:39:31,412 Abuse, in general, 658 00:39:31,586 --> 00:39:34,415 affects development in children. 659 00:39:34,589 --> 00:39:37,157 Like, for instance, the ability to trust, 660 00:39:37,331 --> 00:39:40,203 the ability to form healthy relationships. 661 00:39:43,119 --> 00:39:46,688 [chanting in foreign language] 662 00:39:54,566 --> 00:39:58,918 [indistinct chatter] 663 00:39:59,092 --> 00:40:00,528 Getting to know the girls, 664 00:40:00,702 --> 00:40:02,922 we start developing a bond with them. 665 00:40:03,096 --> 00:40:06,665 So we have to make sure that we are loving. 666 00:40:08,493 --> 00:40:09,711 It's all about trust. 667 00:40:10,364 --> 00:40:12,018 We really want them to know, 668 00:40:12,192 --> 00:40:15,238 that their body is their body and nobody else's. 669 00:40:15,413 --> 00:40:18,198 Do you wanna go for... [speaks foreign language]. 670 00:40:18,372 --> 00:40:20,069 [Jordan] Yeah, you wanna try it from the... 671 00:40:20,243 --> 00:40:22,550 It's really important to teach kids dance 672 00:40:22,724 --> 00:40:24,900 with the good, basic fundamentals, 673 00:40:25,074 --> 00:40:26,511 teaching them the correct way, 674 00:40:26,685 --> 00:40:27,729 teaching them in a loving, healthy way. 675 00:40:27,903 --> 00:40:31,907 [chanting in foreign language] 676 00:40:32,691 --> 00:40:34,301 [Jordan] There's so much more to life 677 00:40:34,475 --> 00:40:36,172 than sadness or darkness. 678 00:40:36,346 --> 00:40:38,044 I want them to know there's people 679 00:40:38,218 --> 00:40:40,612 that want to give you as much love as they deserve. 680 00:40:40,786 --> 00:40:42,352 [Jordan] One. Yeah? 681 00:40:42,527 --> 00:40:46,487 [conversation in foreign language] 682 00:40:46,661 --> 00:40:48,576 Okay, you wanna try it out again? 683 00:40:48,750 --> 00:40:51,187 -Yeah. -Then we'll go on. Yeah. 684 00:40:51,361 --> 00:40:55,365 [chanting in foreign language] 685 00:41:04,287 --> 00:41:05,463 [Jordan] Good. 686 00:41:05,637 --> 00:41:07,943 [Josh] It is so fun to just see 687 00:41:08,117 --> 00:41:09,641 the joy on their faces, 688 00:41:09,815 --> 00:41:11,730 even when the music just begins. 689 00:41:11,904 --> 00:41:13,906 It has been phenomenal to see the girls look forward to it, 690 00:41:14,080 --> 00:41:15,821 just to be so playful and fun. 691 00:41:16,909 --> 00:41:18,606 When they're in our care, 692 00:41:18,780 --> 00:41:20,434 like, one of the things that we want to impart to them 693 00:41:20,608 --> 00:41:23,611 or share with them, is just that they are valuable. 694 00:41:24,351 --> 00:41:26,092 They are so worth it. 695 00:41:26,614 --> 00:41:28,573 And, so, even if they leave our care 696 00:41:28,747 --> 00:41:30,662 and return back into what they were doing before, 697 00:41:30,836 --> 00:41:32,533 the hope is that some point in their lives, 698 00:41:32,707 --> 00:41:33,969 they would be able to say, 699 00:41:34,143 --> 00:41:35,841 "Hey, I remember this time 700 00:41:36,015 --> 00:41:38,191 where these people here were telling me 701 00:41:38,365 --> 00:41:41,499 that I have value and I have worth." 702 00:41:41,673 --> 00:41:44,763 And if they, at some point in their lives, 703 00:41:44,937 --> 00:41:48,070 believe that about themselves, like, that is a great success. 704 00:41:48,244 --> 00:41:52,161 -[upbeat music playing] -[chanting in foreign language] 705 00:42:14,401 --> 00:42:18,405 [calm music playing] 706 00:42:42,821 --> 00:42:46,607 [plates clattering] 707 00:42:46,781 --> 00:42:49,218 [Isabella] My parents separated when I was 13 years old, 708 00:42:49,392 --> 00:42:51,394 and they eventually got back together 709 00:42:51,569 --> 00:42:54,876 when I was around 25, 26, 710 00:42:55,050 --> 00:42:57,139 but their separation was really hard. 711 00:42:58,358 --> 00:43:00,578 So, Elizabeth went with her mother. 712 00:43:01,361 --> 00:43:02,754 Not right away, though. 713 00:43:02,928 --> 00:43:05,278 And then Joseph stayed with me. 714 00:43:06,279 --> 00:43:07,715 So, for Elizabeth, it was hard. 715 00:43:08,760 --> 00:43:10,370 Really, really hard, but... 716 00:43:11,632 --> 00:43:13,329 uh, Chris and I just didn't-- 717 00:43:13,503 --> 00:43:14,983 it just wasn't happening. 718 00:43:15,157 --> 00:43:16,768 When my mom separated from my dad, 719 00:43:16,942 --> 00:43:18,944 we moved to Huntington Beach. 720 00:43:20,815 --> 00:43:22,469 I had to share a room with my mom every night 721 00:43:22,643 --> 00:43:25,167 and being a teenager, it's just-- it's weird. 722 00:43:26,995 --> 00:43:28,736 I didn't have my privacy 723 00:43:28,910 --> 00:43:32,392 and also we didn't have a connection. 724 00:43:33,088 --> 00:43:34,916 So, it was just more awkward, 725 00:43:35,090 --> 00:43:38,703 because people would see me leave from there 726 00:43:38,877 --> 00:43:42,489 and kind of make fun of me that I was living in a motel. 727 00:43:45,623 --> 00:43:47,929 [Chris] But, you know, I wasn't there too much, 728 00:43:48,103 --> 00:43:50,192 -which-- which is bad. -[Isabella] Yeah. 729 00:43:50,366 --> 00:43:52,804 I know, but, uh, you know, I had to work. 730 00:43:52,978 --> 00:43:54,066 She had to work. 731 00:43:54,632 --> 00:43:57,635 So, I lived off of Jack in the Box. 732 00:43:57,809 --> 00:43:58,853 [Chris] Mm-hmm. 733 00:44:00,550 --> 00:44:02,161 [Isabella] We would fight all the time. 734 00:44:02,901 --> 00:44:04,293 She was never there, so, it's not like 735 00:44:04,467 --> 00:44:06,252 I could have really talked to her. 736 00:44:07,645 --> 00:44:09,734 I mean, she-- she's very hard to deal with, 737 00:44:09,908 --> 00:44:12,301 because I had to work 738 00:44:12,475 --> 00:44:14,869 and I had people picking her up, 739 00:44:15,043 --> 00:44:18,090 and sometimes she wasn't there 740 00:44:18,264 --> 00:44:19,308 to be picked up. 741 00:44:20,135 --> 00:44:21,180 [Isabella] Mm-hmm. 742 00:44:21,920 --> 00:44:23,835 And that was hard 743 00:44:24,009 --> 00:44:25,358 because then I'd have to leave work. 744 00:44:27,534 --> 00:44:29,144 [Isabella] I would always think about... 745 00:44:30,232 --> 00:44:33,018 you know, my family, what happened to me as a child. 746 00:44:34,628 --> 00:44:35,890 We couldn't afford dance class, 747 00:44:36,064 --> 00:44:37,936 so I wouldn't go to dance class. 748 00:44:38,110 --> 00:44:40,590 So, I'd just be home alone Saturday and Sunday. 749 00:44:41,113 --> 00:44:42,767 That really changed so much. 750 00:44:42,941 --> 00:44:44,551 I didn't dance as much anymore. 751 00:44:44,725 --> 00:44:47,510 So, I feel like me not dancing anymore, 752 00:44:47,685 --> 00:44:49,295 was me realizing, "Well, 753 00:44:49,469 --> 00:44:50,688 there's something really going on in my body, 754 00:44:50,862 --> 00:44:52,341 that I don't understand." 755 00:44:52,864 --> 00:44:54,735 The time when I was younger, dancing was kind of, 756 00:44:54,909 --> 00:44:56,084 like, healing me. 757 00:44:56,737 --> 00:44:59,784 And then when I stopped, I felt just so uncomfortable 758 00:44:59,958 --> 00:45:01,002 with my body. 759 00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:04,571 So, I think in high school, I was always figuring out, like, 760 00:45:04,745 --> 00:45:06,616 "Why did this happen to me? 761 00:45:06,791 --> 00:45:09,619 Angry, mad, hurt. 762 00:45:09,794 --> 00:45:11,752 Why didn't my parents protect me?" 763 00:45:12,274 --> 00:45:14,668 And I would get really insecure. 764 00:45:17,366 --> 00:45:20,413 The abuse, it affected my entire life 765 00:45:20,587 --> 00:45:22,894 because I wasn't free, I was always in my head, 766 00:45:23,068 --> 00:45:25,635 I always felt judged, I felt dirty. 767 00:45:25,810 --> 00:45:28,813 And I didn't really know that I felt all of those things. 768 00:45:29,683 --> 00:45:31,293 The choices that I made 769 00:45:31,467 --> 00:45:34,470 just because of the experiences 770 00:45:34,644 --> 00:45:36,124 that I had as a younger child. 771 00:45:39,127 --> 00:45:43,131 [piano music playing] 772 00:45:47,745 --> 00:45:49,094 I started stripping 773 00:45:49,268 --> 00:45:50,660 right when I turned 16-years-old. 774 00:45:54,273 --> 00:45:56,797 For ten years. 775 00:45:56,971 --> 00:45:59,582 I stopped around 26, 27. 776 00:45:59,757 --> 00:46:03,673 The first time being there at 16, 777 00:46:03,848 --> 00:46:06,198 I wanted to cry so bad, but I just kept telling myself, 778 00:46:06,372 --> 00:46:08,026 "No, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry." 779 00:46:10,289 --> 00:46:12,595 I wanted my parents at that moment, 780 00:46:12,770 --> 00:46:15,120 even though, like, I was angry at them, 781 00:46:15,294 --> 00:46:16,686 I needed them. 782 00:46:16,861 --> 00:46:18,950 Why am I in the lion's den by myself, 783 00:46:19,124 --> 00:46:21,953 dancing in front of these men that I don't know? 784 00:46:22,127 --> 00:46:25,739 And they're old and scary, they're just like monsters 785 00:46:25,913 --> 00:46:27,915 and here I am, dancing on stage, 786 00:46:28,089 --> 00:46:29,308 and I have to take off my clothes. 787 00:46:29,482 --> 00:46:33,747 ♪ 788 00:46:33,921 --> 00:46:36,489 Getting into stripping wasn't my decision, 789 00:46:36,663 --> 00:46:38,317 it was my cousin's decision. 790 00:46:38,491 --> 00:46:40,188 I met her when-- 791 00:46:40,362 --> 00:46:43,017 I think I was 12-years-old. 792 00:46:43,191 --> 00:46:45,411 She just got married to my cousin 793 00:46:45,585 --> 00:46:47,239 and then when my parents separated, 794 00:46:47,413 --> 00:46:49,023 I started hanging out with her more 795 00:46:49,197 --> 00:46:51,809 and babysitting, I just always looked up to her. 796 00:46:51,983 --> 00:46:54,855 I thought she was beautiful, she was confident, 797 00:46:55,029 --> 00:46:58,337 and I just really admire her a lot. 798 00:46:59,555 --> 00:47:00,730 And I didn't really realize that 799 00:47:00,905 --> 00:47:02,515 until I started doing training 800 00:47:02,689 --> 00:47:04,734 about sex trafficking, sexual abuse, 801 00:47:04,909 --> 00:47:06,345 that she was grooming me, 802 00:47:06,519 --> 00:47:09,391 I think around 14, 803 00:47:09,565 --> 00:47:10,915 15 years old. 804 00:47:11,089 --> 00:47:12,960 The grooming process looks like, 805 00:47:13,134 --> 00:47:15,833 you know, a lot of manipulation 806 00:47:16,007 --> 00:47:19,967 and, uh, guilt, shame, 807 00:47:20,141 --> 00:47:23,405 her showing me a lot of affection and love, 808 00:47:23,579 --> 00:47:26,365 but always the attention of-- 809 00:47:26,539 --> 00:47:28,149 of something that she wanted. 810 00:47:28,323 --> 00:47:30,195 If she picked me up in the morning for school, 811 00:47:30,369 --> 00:47:32,110 she'd be like, "Ew, what are you wearing? 812 00:47:32,284 --> 00:47:33,938 That, like-- that doesn't look good." 813 00:47:34,112 --> 00:47:35,896 She would always tell me that I would look homeless. 814 00:47:36,070 --> 00:47:38,246 It made me feel ashamed that I didn't have anything 815 00:47:38,420 --> 00:47:40,335 and she would always tell me, 816 00:47:40,509 --> 00:47:42,772 "Well, you're young, you're beautiful. 817 00:47:42,947 --> 00:47:46,254 You know, there's clubs where you can actually dance. 818 00:47:46,428 --> 00:47:48,474 And I know that you love to dance 819 00:47:48,648 --> 00:47:50,563 and, you know, you can make money doing that." 820 00:47:50,737 --> 00:47:54,741 [piano music plays] 821 00:48:03,228 --> 00:48:04,969 Now, looking back, 822 00:48:05,143 --> 00:48:07,188 obviously, my cousin was my pimp. 823 00:48:07,362 --> 00:48:09,625 Because when I first started stripping, 824 00:48:09,799 --> 00:48:11,149 I would give her the money 825 00:48:11,323 --> 00:48:13,020 and she would save that money for me. 826 00:48:14,239 --> 00:48:15,675 When she accounted my money, 827 00:48:15,849 --> 00:48:18,025 I only had, like, $400 for my savings 828 00:48:18,199 --> 00:48:20,201 and it was, like, six months of me working, 829 00:48:20,375 --> 00:48:21,986 I'm like, "Where is all that money?" 830 00:48:22,160 --> 00:48:23,596 And she's like, "What do you mean? 831 00:48:23,770 --> 00:48:25,641 I had to, you know, pay for your food. 832 00:48:25,815 --> 00:48:28,470 I dropped you off at the club, I picked you up, 833 00:48:28,644 --> 00:48:30,211 I take you to school. 834 00:48:30,995 --> 00:48:32,213 You owe me that money." 835 00:48:37,262 --> 00:48:38,437 People are always like, "Oh, well, 836 00:48:38,611 --> 00:48:40,134 you can say no, you can leave. 837 00:48:40,308 --> 00:48:42,267 You get yourself out of that situation." 838 00:48:42,441 --> 00:48:43,877 It's, like, no, you can't. 839 00:48:44,922 --> 00:48:46,488 It wasn't like I was 16 years old 840 00:48:46,662 --> 00:48:48,926 and making this decision on my own. 841 00:48:49,100 --> 00:48:52,103 I wasn't a consenting adult at that age. 842 00:48:52,625 --> 00:48:54,932 When somebody shows you that affection, 843 00:48:55,106 --> 00:48:57,325 if you're not getting it at home, 844 00:48:57,499 --> 00:48:58,718 it's hard to say no. 845 00:48:58,892 --> 00:49:00,328 So, young girls, 846 00:49:00,502 --> 00:49:02,548 they don't know who they are at that age. 847 00:49:02,722 --> 00:49:05,594 And when a pimp shows them 848 00:49:05,768 --> 00:49:07,901 any type of love, 849 00:49:08,075 --> 00:49:10,338 why are you gonna leave that situation to go home, 850 00:49:10,512 --> 00:49:13,037 when nobody's there doing those things for you? 851 00:49:15,822 --> 00:49:17,389 The reason why I stopped stripping 852 00:49:17,563 --> 00:49:19,217 was because I just-- ah, 853 00:49:19,391 --> 00:49:23,264 I was having so many flashbacks of, like, the abuse. 854 00:49:23,438 --> 00:49:25,484 I just knew that I needed to get out. 855 00:49:32,012 --> 00:49:33,535 Sometimes I feel like 856 00:49:33,709 --> 00:49:35,015 the part of my life that I was stripping, 857 00:49:35,189 --> 00:49:36,538 was just, like, me floating. 858 00:49:38,497 --> 00:49:40,499 That was somebody else. That wasn't me. 859 00:49:40,673 --> 00:49:45,330 ♪ 860 00:50:01,128 --> 00:50:02,173 I look tired. 861 00:50:14,707 --> 00:50:18,754 [birds chirping] 862 00:50:32,464 --> 00:50:33,639 -Hi! -[woman] Hi! 863 00:50:33,813 --> 00:50:35,641 [both chuckling] 864 00:50:35,815 --> 00:50:38,905 Hi, oh, my God. I'm Isabella. 865 00:50:39,079 --> 00:50:40,646 -Thank you so much. -[woman] You're welcome. 866 00:50:53,572 --> 00:50:54,877 [sniffles] 867 00:50:56,183 --> 00:50:57,880 This was my brother's room. 868 00:51:00,144 --> 00:51:03,277 Um, and then, when they moved out... 869 00:51:05,453 --> 00:51:07,455 then it was me and my brother's room. 870 00:51:07,629 --> 00:51:08,978 So, my brother's bed was right here, 871 00:51:09,153 --> 00:51:10,197 and then I had, like, this... 872 00:51:11,416 --> 00:51:12,678 pretty iron bed... 873 00:51:13,766 --> 00:51:15,159 and this little vanity right here. 874 00:51:22,470 --> 00:51:23,950 The closet was different. 875 00:51:42,751 --> 00:51:43,839 Um... 876 00:51:46,494 --> 00:51:48,322 I used to have, like, a lot of nightmares 877 00:51:48,496 --> 00:51:52,152 when I was younger because of the abuse. 878 00:51:52,326 --> 00:51:53,632 And even though, like, 879 00:51:53,806 --> 00:51:55,547 my parents would leave a light on 880 00:51:55,721 --> 00:51:57,157 in the living room... 881 00:51:58,724 --> 00:52:00,421 I would still, like, freak out. 882 00:52:00,595 --> 00:52:02,249 So, I would just, like, sit in the middle of the room 883 00:52:02,423 --> 00:52:05,034 and just, like, cry, and my parents would be upset. 884 00:52:08,473 --> 00:52:10,214 So, this was the room... 885 00:52:11,998 --> 00:52:14,218 where the abuse started. 886 00:52:15,393 --> 00:52:16,437 And, um... 887 00:52:19,875 --> 00:52:22,400 I was just right over here. [sighs] 888 00:52:33,019 --> 00:52:36,631 It's such a struggle every single day, and... 889 00:52:39,330 --> 00:52:41,375 you don't want them to take your happiness away, 890 00:52:41,549 --> 00:52:43,247 but they do, 891 00:52:43,421 --> 00:52:45,423 because you have to deal with it every single day. 892 00:52:51,211 --> 00:52:53,648 I just wish it never happened to me. 893 00:52:53,822 --> 00:52:56,912 I wish my life was different because I would be different, 894 00:52:57,086 --> 00:53:00,829 I wouldn't have to feel ashamed or alone. 895 00:53:10,622 --> 00:53:14,626 [instrumental music playing] 896 00:53:43,350 --> 00:53:45,134 [Maggie] I don't think any kids are being sexually abused 897 00:53:45,309 --> 00:53:47,485 that aren't having nightmares pretty regularly. 898 00:53:48,181 --> 00:53:50,227 Especially about monsters and things like that 899 00:53:50,401 --> 00:53:51,793 if we're talking about small children. 900 00:53:54,231 --> 00:53:57,277 They often fear that what happened to them, 901 00:53:57,451 --> 00:54:00,672 happened because there was something wrong with them. 902 00:54:01,194 --> 00:54:02,630 "This would not have happened to me, 903 00:54:02,804 --> 00:54:04,328 if I'd been worth anything. 904 00:54:05,198 --> 00:54:06,591 Because if I'd been worth anything, 905 00:54:06,765 --> 00:54:08,070 somebody would have taken care of me, 906 00:54:08,245 --> 00:54:09,724 someone would have protected me, 907 00:54:09,898 --> 00:54:11,378 someone would have made sure 908 00:54:11,552 --> 00:54:13,206 this kind of thing never happened to me." 909 00:54:16,427 --> 00:54:19,168 [Isabella] I needed my parents to let them know, 910 00:54:19,343 --> 00:54:21,127 that what happened is not right 911 00:54:21,301 --> 00:54:23,477 and that they're gonna be there for me, 912 00:54:23,651 --> 00:54:25,262 they're gonna protect me and... 913 00:54:26,872 --> 00:54:28,569 I wanted somebody to hold my hand and let me know 914 00:54:28,743 --> 00:54:29,962 everything was going to be okay. 915 00:54:32,573 --> 00:54:34,575 The reason why I started She-Is, 916 00:54:34,749 --> 00:54:37,012 is because I know what these girls are going through, 917 00:54:37,186 --> 00:54:38,971 I know how they feel, I know that they feel lost, 918 00:54:39,145 --> 00:54:40,929 they feel ashamed. 919 00:54:41,103 --> 00:54:43,976 They feel like it's their fault when it's not their fault. 920 00:54:47,240 --> 00:54:50,069 Everyone should feel worthy of being loved. 921 00:54:50,243 --> 00:54:51,810 I really want them to feel that. 922 00:54:56,336 --> 00:54:59,992 ["For Forever" by Marissa Lauren] 923 00:55:06,912 --> 00:55:11,220 ♪ Hold on to me for forever ♪ 924 00:55:11,395 --> 00:55:13,788 ♪ And never let go ♪ 925 00:55:17,618 --> 00:55:21,622 ♪ I'll keep you safe for forever ♪ 926 00:55:21,796 --> 00:55:24,451 ♪ Wherever we go ♪ 927 00:55:26,366 --> 00:55:28,716 ♪ I'll never let go ♪ 928 00:55:37,899 --> 00:55:40,641 ♪ We'll be high in the clouds ♪ 929 00:55:40,815 --> 00:55:43,557 ♪ While the world spins around ♪ 930 00:55:43,731 --> 00:55:47,256 ♪ Oh, it never slows ♪ 931 00:55:47,431 --> 00:55:52,392 ♪ But I know that we've got time ♪ 932 00:56:00,313 --> 00:56:05,318 ♪ Place your hand in mine ♪ 933 00:56:07,364 --> 00:56:10,715 ♪ And you'll find ♪ 934 00:56:10,889 --> 00:56:15,284 ♪ Hold me forever ♪ 935 00:56:15,459 --> 00:56:17,896 ♪ And never let go ♪ 936 00:56:21,378 --> 00:56:25,730 ♪ I will keep you safe away forever ♪ 937 00:56:25,904 --> 00:56:28,385 ♪ Wherever we go ♪ 938 00:56:29,995 --> 00:56:32,911 ♪ Oh, I'll never let go ♪ 939 00:56:35,435 --> 00:56:40,440 ♪ Oh, I'll never let you go ♪ 940 00:56:40,614 --> 00:56:46,315 ♪ I will be my forever and ever ♪ 941 00:56:46,490 --> 00:56:49,754 ♪ Say you love me forever ♪ 942 00:56:49,928 --> 00:56:54,454 ♪ And for forever I'll never let go ♪ 943 00:56:54,628 --> 00:56:59,633 ♪ 944 00:57:32,274 --> 00:57:35,103 [Isabella] My bad days are, 945 00:57:35,277 --> 00:57:36,453 I don't want to talk to anybody, 946 00:57:36,627 --> 00:57:38,193 I don't want to see anybody. 947 00:57:38,367 --> 00:57:40,021 I get really down on myself. 948 00:57:40,195 --> 00:57:41,806 I feel like a failure. 949 00:57:43,547 --> 00:57:45,244 I let myself down. 950 00:57:45,418 --> 00:57:47,246 A lot of memories will come back 951 00:57:47,420 --> 00:57:49,248 and just, like, 952 00:57:49,422 --> 00:57:51,206 replaying them in my head and, 953 00:57:51,380 --> 00:57:53,426 "Why did this happen?" 954 00:57:54,253 --> 00:57:56,298 Sometimes I just don't want to get out of bed. 955 00:57:56,777 --> 00:57:58,910 I just really disconnect from the world. 956 00:57:59,084 --> 00:58:00,433 I just don't want to talk to anybody, 957 00:58:00,607 --> 00:58:02,304 I get in this really negative mood, 958 00:58:02,479 --> 00:58:05,394 and it's really hard to get myself out of it. 959 00:58:07,092 --> 00:58:11,009 I definitely still have flashbacks 960 00:58:11,183 --> 00:58:12,750 with, like, trauma still. 961 00:58:12,924 --> 00:58:14,186 Like, all of a sudden, I'll have this feeling 962 00:58:14,360 --> 00:58:16,014 that comes over me, and, 963 00:58:16,188 --> 00:58:17,885 like, my body will feel numb and all of a sudden 964 00:58:18,059 --> 00:58:20,584 I have the feeling of the sexual abuse, 965 00:58:20,758 --> 00:58:22,455 and it will just come out of nowhere. 966 00:58:25,066 --> 00:58:26,415 My soul leaves my body. 967 00:58:29,288 --> 00:58:31,246 I've been to a few group classes 968 00:58:31,420 --> 00:58:33,640 with girls who are survivors also, 969 00:58:33,814 --> 00:58:35,163 and they have the same feeling. 970 00:58:37,905 --> 00:58:39,994 It's called dissociation. 971 00:58:41,169 --> 00:58:45,173 And it has to do with cutting out. 972 00:58:47,262 --> 00:58:50,135 It's, like, something in the person says, 973 00:58:50,309 --> 00:58:51,658 "I don't want to be here." 974 00:58:52,964 --> 00:58:56,141 And so, they kind of leave. 975 00:58:57,664 --> 00:59:00,754 They're much less aware then of what's happening here. 976 00:59:00,928 --> 00:59:03,278 It does disrupt the communication 977 00:59:03,452 --> 00:59:04,715 between mind and body. 978 00:59:05,933 --> 00:59:07,979 The one thing that I would get really sad about 979 00:59:08,153 --> 00:59:09,720 is I feel, like, 980 00:59:09,894 --> 00:59:11,286 I'm always gonna have that feeling 981 00:59:11,460 --> 00:59:12,940 for the rest of my life 982 00:59:13,114 --> 00:59:14,463 and it's really sad because they, just, 983 00:59:14,638 --> 00:59:16,248 take your innocence away from you. 984 00:59:16,422 --> 00:59:17,728 So, I feel, like, 985 00:59:17,902 --> 00:59:20,644 I'll never experience that again. 986 00:59:22,210 --> 00:59:23,647 [Maggie] Just because they don't have wounds 987 00:59:23,821 --> 00:59:25,257 on their body 988 00:59:25,431 --> 00:59:27,085 doesn't mean that they're not wounded. 989 00:59:28,652 --> 00:59:30,654 They're very deeply wounded 990 00:59:30,828 --> 00:59:33,395 in terms of how they see themselves. 991 00:59:34,832 --> 00:59:37,138 I can't express that strongly enough. 992 00:59:41,316 --> 00:59:43,275 When you're sexually abused, 993 00:59:43,449 --> 00:59:46,844 you don't understand what's right or what's wrong, 994 00:59:47,018 --> 00:59:50,238 you just do it, because you trust them 995 00:59:50,412 --> 00:59:52,371 and you love them and you wanna-- 996 00:59:52,545 --> 00:59:53,894 you want them to be happy. 997 00:59:54,068 --> 00:59:55,853 [sniffles] 998 00:59:56,027 --> 00:59:58,812 When you share your story, when I talk about my story, 999 00:59:58,986 --> 01:00:00,422 um, I feel connected 1000 01:00:00,597 --> 01:00:03,251 to other girls 1001 01:00:03,425 --> 01:00:05,471 and it makes me feel stronger 1002 01:00:05,645 --> 01:00:08,692 and makes me value myself more. 1003 01:00:09,780 --> 01:00:13,784 [speaks foreign language] 1004 01:00:15,307 --> 01:00:16,700 Does anybody else want to share? 1005 01:00:16,874 --> 01:00:18,789 [speaks foreign language] 1006 01:00:24,098 --> 01:00:25,578 Does she want to come over here? 1007 01:00:25,752 --> 01:00:27,449 -Yeah, she's going to come here. -Come here. 1008 01:00:27,624 --> 01:00:28,712 [translator chuckles] 1009 01:00:29,277 --> 01:00:32,629 [girl speaks foreign language] 1010 01:00:35,849 --> 01:00:36,894 [girl sniffles] 1011 01:00:42,160 --> 01:00:43,683 [girl speaks foreign language] 1012 01:00:49,994 --> 01:00:51,430 [girl speaks foreign language] 1013 01:00:54,128 --> 01:00:55,913 [translator] Uh, like... 1014 01:00:57,741 --> 01:00:58,785 [girl sniffles] 1015 01:01:19,371 --> 01:01:21,678 -KTV. -[girl speaks foreign language] 1016 01:01:26,204 --> 01:01:27,248 [girl sniffles] 1017 01:01:32,253 --> 01:01:33,428 [Isabella] Her aunt encouraged her? 1018 01:01:34,212 --> 01:01:36,170 Sharing my story 1019 01:01:36,344 --> 01:01:39,130 is the first step to healing. 1020 01:01:41,175 --> 01:01:43,525 If you hold it in, it's just like toxin. 1021 01:01:44,135 --> 01:01:45,876 You really need to release that, 1022 01:01:46,050 --> 01:01:47,834 you really need to talk about what happened to you, 1023 01:01:48,008 --> 01:01:49,662 because once you do, then you realize 1024 01:01:49,836 --> 01:01:51,533 that you're not alone, 1025 01:01:51,708 --> 01:01:54,449 that there's so many survivors out there just like you. 1026 01:01:55,146 --> 01:01:57,104 So, I know in telling my story, 1027 01:01:57,278 --> 01:01:58,584 I'm healing myself. 1028 01:02:00,412 --> 01:02:03,676 I shared my story at the She-Is fundraiser 1029 01:02:03,850 --> 01:02:05,722 before we went on this trip. 1030 01:02:06,505 --> 01:02:08,202 And that was actually the first time 1031 01:02:08,376 --> 01:02:11,336 I actually stood 1032 01:02:11,510 --> 01:02:12,729 in my story. 1033 01:02:13,251 --> 01:02:14,905 And I said, "I am Shawna Whitlock 1034 01:02:15,079 --> 01:02:16,428 and an incest survivor." 1035 01:02:17,168 --> 01:02:20,040 And that was a big, big thing for me. 1036 01:02:20,911 --> 01:02:22,260 There's a lot of shame in that. 1037 01:02:22,739 --> 01:02:26,438 So, the fact that, like, we're getting people to open up, 1038 01:02:26,612 --> 01:02:28,396 that's, like, the first step in healing. 1039 01:02:29,136 --> 01:02:31,269 And it was beautiful to see 1040 01:02:31,443 --> 01:02:34,011 the girls have enough strength 1041 01:02:34,185 --> 01:02:36,274 to tell their story. 1042 01:02:36,448 --> 01:02:38,972 And then I got to go and sit next to one of the girls 1043 01:02:39,146 --> 01:02:41,148 and hold her hand and remind her to breathe 1044 01:02:41,322 --> 01:02:42,846 and not hold it in 1045 01:02:43,020 --> 01:02:45,283 and all of these things that I've been through. 1046 01:02:48,460 --> 01:02:50,027 [Erin] Listening to their stories 1047 01:02:50,201 --> 01:02:53,073 just helps remind us why we do what we do. 1048 01:02:53,247 --> 01:02:54,727 I guess we-- 1049 01:02:54,901 --> 01:02:57,251 we start to feel this level of responsibility 1050 01:02:57,425 --> 01:02:59,993 when they trust us to share their stories. 1051 01:03:00,167 --> 01:03:03,431 So, it's when they want to open up to us. 1052 01:03:05,651 --> 01:03:08,959 [Shawna] It's really all we need as survivors to heal 1053 01:03:09,133 --> 01:03:10,221 is just listening. 1054 01:03:12,832 --> 01:03:16,357 [Maggie] The healing process for a survivor is to... 1055 01:03:17,794 --> 01:03:19,230 get engaged with somebody 1056 01:03:19,404 --> 01:03:21,449 who understands the healing process. 1057 01:03:21,623 --> 01:03:23,974 There are some groups like that. 1058 01:03:24,148 --> 01:03:26,411 There's a 12-step group for survivors 1059 01:03:26,585 --> 01:03:29,675 and it's really, really helpful to be in a group like that 1060 01:03:29,849 --> 01:03:33,592 because it takes away your idea that 1061 01:03:33,766 --> 01:03:35,855 this doesn't happen to decent human beings. 1062 01:03:37,117 --> 01:03:39,467 Sex abuse takes place 1063 01:03:39,641 --> 01:03:41,165 in a relationship 1064 01:03:41,339 --> 01:03:44,124 and it can be healed only in relationship. 1065 01:03:44,690 --> 01:03:47,649 So, other people who are trustworthy 1066 01:03:47,824 --> 01:03:49,782 and supportive and caring 1067 01:03:52,219 --> 01:03:53,830 Relating to a person... 1068 01:03:56,833 --> 01:03:59,531 that's probably the most important thing. 1069 01:04:02,055 --> 01:04:03,491 [Rick] You never give up hope, 1070 01:04:03,665 --> 01:04:04,797 but it's difficult here. 1071 01:04:05,624 --> 01:04:07,452 There's this honor system here. 1072 01:04:07,626 --> 01:04:08,932 The girls have been sold by their family. 1073 01:04:09,106 --> 01:04:10,629 Their families are using and abusing them 1074 01:04:10,803 --> 01:04:12,587 but the girls feel obligated to the family, 1075 01:04:12,761 --> 01:04:14,372 so they do not want to leave while that debt is still there, 1076 01:04:14,546 --> 01:04:16,200 they want to work it off. 1077 01:04:16,374 --> 01:04:17,636 And so, you keep coming back trying to tell them, 1078 01:04:17,810 --> 01:04:19,333 "No, you don't owe them this." 1079 01:04:20,117 --> 01:04:21,466 In western culture, it's the parents job 1080 01:04:21,640 --> 01:04:23,120 to take care of the child, 1081 01:04:23,294 --> 01:04:24,991 to make sure the child has a better life. 1082 01:04:25,165 --> 01:04:26,688 Here, it's the child's job to take care of the parent 1083 01:04:26,863 --> 01:04:28,342 and make sure the parent has an easier life, 1084 01:04:28,516 --> 01:04:29,953 so the kids will continue to work 1085 01:04:30,127 --> 01:04:31,693 and make life easier for the parents 1086 01:04:31,868 --> 01:04:34,609 and not to dishonor Dad by walking out on a debt. 1087 01:04:34,783 --> 01:04:36,698 And so you keep coming back and you keep coming back 1088 01:04:36,873 --> 01:04:38,396 hoping at some point they've been... 1089 01:04:39,788 --> 01:04:40,877 they've had enough. 1090 01:04:45,229 --> 01:04:49,189 [interviewer speaks foreign language] 1091 01:04:53,541 --> 01:04:57,545 [Lily speaks foreign language] 1092 01:05:58,606 --> 01:06:01,740 I would say 80-90% want to return home one day 1093 01:06:01,914 --> 01:06:04,221 and they want to build those relationships with them. 1094 01:06:05,178 --> 01:06:07,659 Their families are who they ultimately 1095 01:06:07,833 --> 01:06:09,835 really do love and want to be with. 1096 01:06:14,492 --> 01:06:16,320 [Isabella] We don't talk about the abuse. 1097 01:06:16,494 --> 01:06:18,235 I think 1098 01:06:18,409 --> 01:06:20,802 it's something that's very sensitive to them. 1099 01:06:20,977 --> 01:06:24,241 So, I've tried to bring it up before, 1100 01:06:24,415 --> 01:06:25,982 but it just-- it never works out. 1101 01:06:28,071 --> 01:06:29,898 Not having the conversation about it, 1102 01:06:30,073 --> 01:06:31,988 I think it definitely separates us. 1103 01:06:32,771 --> 01:06:35,078 It's really hard because none of us really talk about it, 1104 01:06:35,252 --> 01:06:36,905 my parents don't want to talk about it 1105 01:06:37,080 --> 01:06:38,646 and, you know, 1106 01:06:38,820 --> 01:06:41,910 there's no way to really heal from that part. 1107 01:06:43,782 --> 01:06:46,045 Absolutely, I mean, I'm really proud, I mean... 1108 01:06:47,090 --> 01:06:48,787 trafficking, I mean... 1109 01:06:50,267 --> 01:06:52,834 -it's, you know, it's... -[Isabella chuckles] 1110 01:06:53,009 --> 01:06:55,446 ...it's huge to help, you know, 1111 01:06:55,620 --> 01:06:57,491 teach dance to kids that have been taken. 1112 01:06:57,665 --> 01:06:58,710 I mean... 1113 01:07:00,277 --> 01:07:01,321 It's different. 1114 01:07:02,235 --> 01:07:03,758 I-- I didn't think 1115 01:07:03,932 --> 01:07:05,151 that she would ever do something like this. 1116 01:07:06,500 --> 01:07:07,545 Yeah. 1117 01:07:08,198 --> 01:07:10,200 How she ever got the idea, I don't know, 1118 01:07:10,374 --> 01:07:14,073 but trying to help in this manner is fantastic. 1119 01:07:16,815 --> 01:07:18,251 [Isabella] My parents definitely support 1120 01:07:18,425 --> 01:07:19,818 my organization. 1121 01:07:20,601 --> 01:07:23,082 They'll come, they'll feed us, 1122 01:07:23,256 --> 01:07:24,605 and if I need anything done, 1123 01:07:24,779 --> 01:07:26,694 they definitely, you know, help me out. 1124 01:07:26,868 --> 01:07:28,522 They're very supportive in that way. 1125 01:07:28,696 --> 01:07:30,394 So, I do think it's a little weird that, 1126 01:07:30,568 --> 01:07:32,004 you know, I have this organization 1127 01:07:32,178 --> 01:07:35,747 based on being a survivor of sexual abuse, 1128 01:07:35,921 --> 01:07:37,444 but they don't really talk about it. 1129 01:07:37,966 --> 01:07:39,359 So, 1130 01:07:39,533 --> 01:07:42,536 I guess them showing support 1131 01:07:42,710 --> 01:07:45,365 in that way is comforting. 1132 01:07:47,411 --> 01:07:50,936 But I would really like to discuss it with them. 1133 01:07:51,458 --> 01:07:52,503 I just don't know how. 1134 01:07:56,420 --> 01:07:58,422 -I did the best I could. -[bowls clattering] 1135 01:07:58,596 --> 01:08:00,424 Didn't know how 1136 01:08:00,598 --> 01:08:02,774 because I didn't grow up in a-- in a... 1137 01:08:03,905 --> 01:08:05,603 a good revi-- environment. 1138 01:08:11,913 --> 01:08:15,743 Just that I love her a lot, you know, she's my girl. 1139 01:08:16,918 --> 01:08:17,876 Only girl. 1140 01:08:18,050 --> 01:08:21,967 [calm music playing] 1141 01:08:22,141 --> 01:08:25,449 [lips moving noiselessly] 1142 01:08:25,623 --> 01:08:27,929 ♪ 1143 01:08:33,457 --> 01:08:34,762 [Josh] I think something that's really interesting, 1144 01:08:34,936 --> 01:08:36,721 is just every time I go home, 1145 01:08:36,895 --> 01:08:38,418 I'm always amazed by how little 1146 01:08:38,592 --> 01:08:39,767 people want to talk about what I'm doing. 1147 01:08:40,899 --> 01:08:42,466 And so, I think that a lot of people 1148 01:08:42,640 --> 01:08:44,163 almost turned a blind eye to it, 1149 01:08:44,337 --> 01:08:46,209 because it's easier not to know everything 1150 01:08:46,383 --> 01:08:47,427 that's going on. 1151 01:08:48,733 --> 01:08:51,127 If our culture wanted to do something about it, 1152 01:08:51,301 --> 01:08:54,608 they would do something about supporting families... 1153 01:08:55,653 --> 01:08:59,135 to educating families, uh... 1154 01:09:00,136 --> 01:09:01,659 to having better 1155 01:09:01,833 --> 01:09:03,530 and different kinds of support for families 1156 01:09:03,704 --> 01:09:05,097 would be really helpful. 1157 01:09:06,272 --> 01:09:07,534 [Rick] It-- it's got to be worked 1158 01:09:07,708 --> 01:09:08,753 at every level. 1159 01:09:09,971 --> 01:09:11,756 Local authorities have to take it seriously 1160 01:09:11,930 --> 01:09:13,366 'cause-- because a lot of people in America will say, 1161 01:09:13,540 --> 01:09:16,152 "Well, this is, uh, voluntary." 1162 01:09:16,717 --> 01:09:17,675 But it's not. 1163 01:09:17,849 --> 01:09:21,853 [string music playing] 1164 01:09:25,509 --> 01:09:27,119 Whatever drove them to that, 1165 01:09:27,293 --> 01:09:28,947 whether it's economic situations, 1166 01:09:29,121 --> 01:09:30,557 abuse, 1167 01:09:30,731 --> 01:09:33,038 they would rather be doing something else. 1168 01:09:36,084 --> 01:09:38,217 I want them to value themselves 1169 01:09:38,391 --> 01:09:40,263 and know their worth 1170 01:09:40,437 --> 01:09:43,788 and love themselves and love their body. 1171 01:09:44,615 --> 01:09:47,183 And nobody should take that away from them. 1172 01:09:51,578 --> 01:09:52,840 [Rick] One of the greatest things... 1173 01:09:54,320 --> 01:09:55,365 you feel here... 1174 01:09:56,757 --> 01:09:58,194 is when they actually realize 1175 01:09:58,368 --> 01:10:00,848 you love them, not for their bodies. 1176 01:10:01,849 --> 01:10:03,199 Okay? 1177 01:10:03,373 --> 01:10:04,635 When they know that you're there 1178 01:10:04,809 --> 01:10:06,202 just 'cause you care about them, 1179 01:10:06,376 --> 01:10:07,638 it's not what you can get from them, 1180 01:10:07,812 --> 01:10:08,682 and that's just an amazing feeling. 1181 01:10:10,380 --> 01:10:11,772 [Isabella] Can I have a hug? 1182 01:10:11,946 --> 01:10:13,557 [translator 1 speaks foreign language] 1183 01:10:13,731 --> 01:10:15,341 [Isabella laughing] Gimme a hug. 1184 01:10:28,833 --> 01:10:30,617 Tell her she's not alone and I love you. 1185 01:10:31,488 --> 01:10:32,706 [both laughing] 1186 01:10:39,844 --> 01:10:43,848 [indistinct chatter in background] 1187 01:10:47,243 --> 01:10:49,245 [speaks foreign language] 1188 01:10:49,419 --> 01:10:51,943 [indistinct chatter in background] 1189 01:11:03,128 --> 01:11:05,957 [gasping] Oh, my God, you girls look so pretty. 1190 01:11:06,131 --> 01:11:10,178 [indistinct chatter] 1191 01:11:16,750 --> 01:11:20,232 [Shawna] How are you? Yeah. 1192 01:11:20,406 --> 01:11:25,411 [indistinct conversation] 1193 01:11:50,175 --> 01:11:52,482 [announcer speaks foreign language] 1194 01:11:52,656 --> 01:11:54,962 [all applauding] 1195 01:11:56,921 --> 01:11:59,271 [Shawna] Dancing is an amazing healing tool. 1196 01:12:00,925 --> 01:12:03,884 It's a mind-body connection, and then the music comes in, 1197 01:12:04,058 --> 01:12:05,799 and music is so powerful. 1198 01:12:05,973 --> 01:12:09,412 And then, to tie everything in, 1199 01:12:09,586 --> 01:12:12,023 you're dancing as a unit, 1200 01:12:12,197 --> 01:12:15,940 and that in itself is really impactful 1201 01:12:16,114 --> 01:12:17,245 and empowering. 1202 01:12:19,900 --> 01:12:22,294 Because usually we always just feel so alone. 1203 01:12:22,468 --> 01:12:24,035 In those moments of dancing, 1204 01:12:24,209 --> 01:12:27,125 we're a unit with each other, 1205 01:12:27,299 --> 01:12:28,953 and that's what's healing... 1206 01:12:30,389 --> 01:12:32,783 is you kind of just live in the moment 1207 01:12:32,957 --> 01:12:34,828 instead of living in the past 1208 01:12:35,002 --> 01:12:37,353 or worrying about the future. [laughs] 1209 01:12:39,616 --> 01:12:42,358 We see them grow within two weeks, 1210 01:12:42,532 --> 01:12:45,404 and they're just so sweet and so kind, and-- 1211 01:12:45,578 --> 01:12:47,275 and they're so proud of themselves 1212 01:12:47,450 --> 01:12:50,409 that they actually remember this choreography 1213 01:12:50,583 --> 01:12:53,673 and to put on a performance and show what they've done, 1214 01:12:53,847 --> 01:12:55,327 and it gives them confidence. 1215 01:12:59,897 --> 01:13:01,594 [Shawna] I'm realizing a lot of my thoughts 1216 01:13:01,768 --> 01:13:03,640 and a lot of my actions 1217 01:13:03,814 --> 01:13:05,946 or even just how I say things 1218 01:13:06,120 --> 01:13:08,122 is coming from a victim mindset. 1219 01:13:09,080 --> 01:13:11,212 It takes a lot of strength to just step out 1220 01:13:11,387 --> 01:13:12,823 and be like, "No, I'm a survivor." 1221 01:13:15,303 --> 01:13:19,307 [upbeat music playing] 1222 01:13:21,309 --> 01:13:23,877 It's actually really difficult to talk to anyone about it, 1223 01:13:24,051 --> 01:13:26,010 that has not been through it. 1224 01:13:28,795 --> 01:13:31,842 What I've noticed for myself is working with these girls, 1225 01:13:32,016 --> 01:13:33,887 I finally feel understood. 1226 01:13:35,672 --> 01:13:38,457 There's been a huge shift, and I know it's from this trip. 1227 01:13:39,937 --> 01:13:42,505 I felt misunderstood my entire life. 1228 01:13:43,114 --> 01:13:44,985 Being with these girls, 1229 01:13:45,159 --> 01:13:46,509 just looking into their eyes, 1230 01:13:46,683 --> 01:13:48,162 hearing their stories, it's like... 1231 01:13:50,295 --> 01:13:52,123 "That's me, and I'm you, 1232 01:13:52,297 --> 01:13:53,429 and we're the same." 1233 01:13:58,042 --> 01:13:59,565 [Josh] I love seeing a girl first come in 1234 01:13:59,739 --> 01:14:01,872 and then see her eight months down the road 1235 01:14:02,046 --> 01:14:04,962 where you see her laughing and playing and dancing 1236 01:14:05,136 --> 01:14:07,312 and interacting with the other girls 1237 01:14:07,486 --> 01:14:09,706 and maybe even being the center of attention. 1238 01:14:09,880 --> 01:14:11,229 When she first came in, 1239 01:14:11,403 --> 01:14:12,796 that's not how she would be at all. 1240 01:14:12,970 --> 01:14:14,319 You kind of see them come alive, 1241 01:14:14,493 --> 01:14:15,973 see their personalities come out 1242 01:14:16,147 --> 01:14:18,715 and see them open up 1243 01:14:18,889 --> 01:14:20,717 and even open up their hearts to the staff here, 1244 01:14:20,891 --> 01:14:23,284 to the girls here, and to other experiences 1245 01:14:23,459 --> 01:14:24,808 and trying new things. 1246 01:14:28,420 --> 01:14:30,248 The way that she has come in, 1247 01:14:30,422 --> 01:14:31,771 full of energy, full of life, 1248 01:14:31,945 --> 01:14:34,513 and has started speaking to the girls 1249 01:14:34,687 --> 01:14:36,863 and talking with them, it brings the girls to life. 1250 01:14:37,037 --> 01:14:38,517 And I know that it makes a huge difference 1251 01:14:38,691 --> 01:14:39,910 in their lives. 1252 01:14:42,173 --> 01:14:43,435 [Isabella] Closure. 1253 01:14:43,609 --> 01:14:46,003 [sighs] I really want to see that. 1254 01:14:46,830 --> 01:14:49,485 I honestly don't know what closure looks like. 1255 01:14:52,139 --> 01:14:54,707 I'm still in it also, 1256 01:14:54,881 --> 01:14:56,666 and I still have so many feelings 1257 01:14:56,840 --> 01:14:59,233 and so many emotions that I'm going through now. 1258 01:15:00,191 --> 01:15:01,758 Even though if I don't feel myself 1259 01:15:01,932 --> 01:15:03,586 there completely yet, 1260 01:15:03,760 --> 01:15:05,022 I know that I'm working on it 1261 01:15:05,196 --> 01:15:06,197 and I know that they see that. 1262 01:15:09,026 --> 01:15:11,419 Every day I work on myself, 1263 01:15:11,594 --> 01:15:13,509 I have to remind myself 1264 01:15:13,683 --> 01:15:16,163 that I am enough 1265 01:15:16,337 --> 01:15:18,209 and I am strong... 1266 01:15:19,253 --> 01:15:22,169 and I'm-- I'm courageous 1267 01:15:22,343 --> 01:15:23,823 because I overcame... 1268 01:15:24,868 --> 01:15:25,912 that life. 1269 01:15:29,089 --> 01:15:33,093 [emotional music playing] 1270 01:15:44,888 --> 01:15:46,411 To the little girl in my heart... 1271 01:15:47,891 --> 01:15:49,240 I see you in pain... 1272 01:15:50,850 --> 01:15:53,113 and I know about the abuse 1273 01:15:53,287 --> 01:15:55,115 and I know no one listened. 1274 01:15:58,336 --> 01:16:00,643 I know all of this because I'm a part of you. 1275 01:16:00,817 --> 01:16:03,341 [waves crashing] 1276 01:16:03,515 --> 01:16:06,562 I am that part of you that holds out to hope 1277 01:16:06,736 --> 01:16:08,564 when you feel like there isn't any left. 1278 01:16:11,044 --> 01:16:13,525 I want you to know that the things that happen to you 1279 01:16:13,699 --> 01:16:15,179 don't make you who you are. 1280 01:16:16,267 --> 01:16:18,312 You are valuable, strong, 1281 01:16:18,486 --> 01:16:21,011 and deserving of all the love in the world. 1282 01:16:24,318 --> 01:16:27,539 I know it may be difficult to understand now... 1283 01:16:29,106 --> 01:16:30,368 but the world needs you. 1284 01:16:31,325 --> 01:16:33,676 You will go on to bring comfort, joy, 1285 01:16:33,850 --> 01:16:36,983 and safety to other girls just like you. 1286 01:16:38,550 --> 01:16:40,900 One day, you'll have the chance 1287 01:16:41,074 --> 01:16:43,424 to tell that little girl in your heart 1288 01:16:43,599 --> 01:16:46,079 that she is not damaged or dirty. 1289 01:16:48,691 --> 01:16:50,257 She is beautiful. 1290 01:16:55,523 --> 01:16:57,134 And she is a survivor. 1291 01:16:57,308 --> 01:17:01,268 ["For Now" by Marissa Lauren] 1292 01:17:08,624 --> 01:17:13,280 ♪ Stuck in the eye of a storm ♪ 1293 01:17:15,195 --> 01:17:19,722 ♪ Whichever way I turn, I'm torn ♪ 1294 01:17:21,593 --> 01:17:27,294 ♪ No silver lining guides my way ♪ 1295 01:17:27,468 --> 01:17:32,473 ♪ Just trying to make it through each day ♪ 1296 01:17:32,648 --> 01:17:35,476 ♪ Though the skies are gray ♪ 1297 01:17:35,651 --> 01:17:37,435 ♪ It's only for now ♪ 1298 01:17:38,610 --> 01:17:42,788 ♪ Only for now ♪ 1299 01:17:42,962 --> 01:17:44,703 ♪ Hold your head high ♪ 1300 01:17:44,877 --> 01:17:48,576 ♪ And be proud of where you are now ♪ 1301 01:17:48,751 --> 01:17:52,972 ♪ 'Cause our problems are only problems ♪ 1302 01:17:53,146 --> 01:17:55,235 ♪ For now ♪ 1303 01:18:06,029 --> 01:18:10,294 ♪ Weight of the worst keeps you awake ♪ 1304 01:18:12,905 --> 01:18:18,432 ♪ Roll with the punches just to stay sane ♪ 1305 01:18:18,606 --> 01:18:23,524 ♪ Life will always find a way to change ♪ 1306 01:18:23,699 --> 01:18:27,572 ♪ But the plan remains the same ♪ 1307 01:18:27,746 --> 01:18:33,317 ♪ Try to make it through each day ♪ 1308 01:18:33,491 --> 01:18:36,537 ♪ It's only for now [for now] ♪ 1309 01:18:36,712 --> 01:18:39,802 ♪ Only for now [for now] ♪ 1310 01:18:42,979 --> 01:18:45,808 ♪ It's only for now [for now] ♪ 1311 01:18:45,982 --> 01:18:48,419 ♪ It's only for now [for now] ♪ 1312 01:18:48,593 --> 01:18:52,466 ♪ Only for now [for now] ♪ 1313 01:18:52,640 --> 01:18:55,731 ♪ Hold your head high and be proud ♪ 1314 01:18:55,905 --> 01:18:58,864 ♪ Of where you are right now ♪ 1315 01:18:59,038 --> 01:19:02,999 ♪ 'Cause our problems are only problems ♪ 1316 01:19:03,173 --> 01:19:06,089 ♪ When the gravity of life sets in ♪ 1317 01:19:06,263 --> 01:19:10,093 ♪ And it seems there's no way to win ♪ 1318 01:19:10,267 --> 01:19:12,138 ♪ Instead of fallin' to the ground ♪ 1319 01:19:12,312 --> 01:19:15,315 ♪ Stand up strong you know how ♪ 1320 01:19:15,489 --> 01:19:18,536 ♪ And when it seems like you have to choose ♪ 1321 01:19:18,710 --> 01:19:22,627 ♪ Between what you want and what you have to do ♪ 1322 01:19:22,801 --> 01:19:24,890 ♪ And instead of crumbling to the ground ♪ 1323 01:19:25,064 --> 01:19:27,719 ♪ Stand up strong ♪ 1324 01:19:27,893 --> 01:19:32,898 ♪ You know how ♪ 1325 01:19:34,247 --> 01:19:37,033 ♪ If only for now ♪ 1326 01:19:37,207 --> 01:19:40,340 ♪ If only for now ♪ 1327 01:19:40,514 --> 01:19:42,865 ♪ It's only for now [for now] ♪ 1328 01:19:43,039 --> 01:19:46,738 ♪ Only for now [for now] ♪ 1329 01:19:46,912 --> 01:19:50,307 ♪ Hold your head high and be proud ♪ 1330 01:19:50,481 --> 01:19:52,831 ♪ Of where you are now ♪ 1331 01:19:53,005 --> 01:19:57,967 ♪ 'Cause we're only here for now ♪ 1332 01:19:59,882 --> 01:20:03,886 [wind blowing] 1333 01:20:13,939 --> 01:20:17,943 [piano music playing]