﻿1
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-== [ www.OpenSubtitles.org ] ==-

2
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Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org

3
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I'm gonna miss you so much.

4
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Well, you'll come and visit me
and, uh, I'll call.

5
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- I love you so much.
- Oh, me, too.

6
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Still some packing to do.

7
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Got a big day tomorrow.

8
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- Okay, Mom. I'm coming.
- Early start and a long drive.

9
00:00:45,554 --> 00:00:46,555
Goodbye.

10
00:00:46,638 --> 00:00:48,223
- Bye, Mrs. Sawyer.
- Bye.

11
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- She hates me.
- No she doesn't.

12
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- She doesn't.
- No, she really, really does.

13
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But I love you. Okay?

14
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I... I gotta go.
I'll call you when I get there.

15
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Call me from the road.

16
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Okay, it's a three-hour drive
to Michigan State.

17
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We're gonna be okay.
I'll see you soon.

18
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- Okay. Mmm-hmm.
- Promise.

19
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You bet your ass you will.

20
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<i>Sittin' here
eatin' my heart out, waitin'</i>

21
00:01:34,102 --> 00:01:37,689
{\an8}<i>Waitin' for some lover to call</i>

22
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{\an8}<i>Dialed about a thousand numbers lately</i>

23
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{\an8}<i>Almost rang the phone off the wall</i>

24
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{\an8}<i>Lookin' for a lover who needs another</i>

25
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{\an8}<i>Don't want another night on my own</i>

26
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<i>Wanna share my love
with a warm-blooded lover</i>

27
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{\an8}<i>Wanna bring a wild man back home</i>

28
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{\an8}Oh, shit.

29
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{\an8}<i>Gotta have some hot love
baby, this evenin'</i>

30
00:02:04,967 --> 00:02:08,511
{\an8}<i>I need some hot stuff, baby, tonight</i>

31
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{\an8}<i>I want some hot stuff, baby, this evenin'</i>

32
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{\an8}<i>Gotta have some lovin'</i>

33
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{\an8}<i>Gotta have some love tonight</i>

34
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<i>Hot stuff</i>

35
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Oh, no.

36
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Oh. Yeah, I'm bare back there. Okay.

37
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Shit.

38
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{\an8}Oh, god damn it. God damn it.

39
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{\an8}<i>I need hot stuff</i>

40
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{\an8}Hello?

41
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{\an8}<i>I want some hot stuff
That's right</i>

42
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{\an8}Hello?

43
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{\an8}Yeah. Okay. Here we go.

44
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{\an8}Oh...

45
00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:29,509
{\an8}Oh, yeah.

46
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{\an8}<i>Hot, hot, hot, hot stuff</i>

47
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{\an8}<i>Hot, hot, hot</i>

48
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{\an8}Oh, shit.

49
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{\an8}<i>Hot, hot, hot, hot stuff</i>

50
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{\an8}<i>Hot, hot, hot</i>

51
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{\an8}<i>How's about some hot stuff
baby, this evenin'?</i>

52
00:03:49,321 --> 00:03:51,323
{\an8}<i>Ooh, I need your loving</i>

53
00:03:51,406 --> 00:03:53,659
{\an8}<i>Gotta have your hot stuff tonight</i>

54
00:03:53,742 --> 00:03:55,035
{\an8}<i>Hot stuff</i>

55
00:03:59,748 --> 00:04:01,124
- Annie?
- Hi.

56
00:04:01,208 --> 00:04:02,209
Oh!

57
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<i>Hot stuff</i>

58
00:04:03,752 --> 00:04:05,254
<i>Oh, yes!</i>

59
00:04:05,379 --> 00:04:06,380
<i>Oh...</i>

60
00:04:09,716 --> 00:04:12,386
Patricia! I'm dying for
a piece of that pie, hon.

61
00:04:15,722 --> 00:04:17,348
- Surprise.
- What are you doin'?

62
00:04:17,432 --> 00:04:19,685
You leave for college tomorrow
and I wanted to give you

63
00:04:19,768 --> 00:04:21,812
a night to remember.

64
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- Sex.
- Oh.

65
00:04:24,314 --> 00:04:25,732
- I want to give you sex.
- Sure. Yeah.

66
00:04:25,857 --> 00:04:27,776
- Sex with me, tonight, now.
- Yeah. Yeah, okay.

67
00:04:27,859 --> 00:04:29,194
Cool. I just...

68
00:04:29,278 --> 00:04:30,737
I thought you didn't want to.

69
00:04:30,821 --> 00:04:33,156
Oh, of course I want to.

70
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- I just want it to be special.
- Yeah.

71
00:04:35,534 --> 00:04:37,578
- And romantic. And perfect.
- Right. Yeah.

72
00:04:37,661 --> 00:04:40,330
I love you
and I wanna lose my virginity to you.

73
00:04:40,414 --> 00:04:42,499
Oh, that's... That's so nice.

74
00:04:42,583 --> 00:04:44,293
- That is a Christmas card.
- That's what I said.

75
00:04:44,376 --> 00:04:47,671
- I'm gonna take a picture.
- My parents would love to see his face.

76
00:04:48,171 --> 00:04:49,256
You wanna do the thing?

77
00:04:49,673 --> 00:04:51,258
Guess what I'm wearing under my coat.

78
00:04:51,341 --> 00:04:53,886
Oh, I'm so ready. I'm so ready.

79
00:04:54,511 --> 00:04:56,513
Oh, my... Oh, what... Uh...

80
00:04:56,597 --> 00:04:57,723
That's not what I wanted.

81
00:04:57,806 --> 00:04:59,099
Wow, what a beautiful pie.

82
00:04:59,182 --> 00:05:00,517
- <i>Hi.</i>
- <i>Hello.</i>

83
00:05:00,601 --> 00:05:01,685
Who the hell is it?

84
00:05:01,768 --> 00:05:03,061
<i>It's me, Daddy.</i>

85
00:05:03,145 --> 00:05:06,189
- You're on a video chat. Yeah.
- It's a video chat.

86
00:05:06,273 --> 00:05:08,108
What're you doing on TV?

87
00:05:08,191 --> 00:05:09,818
- Maybe you need, like, a doctor?
- No. No.

88
00:05:09,902 --> 00:05:11,528
- Need some ointment or something... Oh.
- Shut up.

89
00:05:11,612 --> 00:05:13,697
Let's go upstairs
and see your grandson, huh?

90
00:05:13,780 --> 00:05:16,283
- We made this pie for him.
- Yeah. It's really hot.

91
00:05:16,366 --> 00:05:17,576
She did
such a good job.

92
00:05:17,659 --> 00:05:18,994
- <i>Where are you?</i>
- <i>I'm right here.</i>

93
00:05:19,077 --> 00:05:21,163
<i>No, not you.
I'm talking to them.</i>

94
00:05:21,246 --> 00:05:23,248
We're going upstairs, Mom.

95
00:05:23,332 --> 00:05:25,542
And Jason's gonna be surprised.

96
00:05:26,293 --> 00:05:28,295
- Just wait.
- Just wait.

97
00:05:28,378 --> 00:05:31,506
- <i>Who's Jason?</i>
- <i>Jason's your grandson, honey.</i>

98
00:05:31,590 --> 00:05:33,550
<i>What channel is this?</i>

99
00:05:34,176 --> 00:05:35,177
Hmm.

100
00:05:35,260 --> 00:05:36,845
Oh! What is that?

101
00:05:38,013 --> 00:05:40,057
{\an8}What?

102
00:05:43,518 --> 00:05:45,020
Uh-huh. Sure. Okay. Yeah.

103
00:05:47,773 --> 00:05:49,066
Honey.

104
00:05:49,149 --> 00:05:50,984
We have a surprise for you.

105
00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:55,197
- Jason?
- Jason.

106
00:05:55,280 --> 00:06:00,202
<i>Girl's got a prophylactic
in her mouth.</i>

107
00:06:01,745 --> 00:06:03,288
Hold on, Mom. I'm not dressed.

108
00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:07,167
Are you choking on the...

109
00:06:07,251 --> 00:06:09,169
Jason Sawyer, open this door!

110
00:06:09,253 --> 00:06:12,130
Sorry, Mom,
I got a charley horse in my leg.

111
00:06:12,214 --> 00:06:13,423
Can you bring me the banana

112
00:06:13,507 --> 00:06:14,883
for the potassium?

113
00:06:17,386 --> 00:06:18,470
Okay.

114
00:06:18,554 --> 00:06:19,930
I love you very much.

115
00:06:20,013 --> 00:06:21,431
But, uh, you gotta go.

116
00:06:21,515 --> 00:06:22,516
Okay. Bye.

117
00:06:31,233 --> 00:06:33,068
- Jason Sawyer!
- Sorry, Mom.

118
00:06:33,151 --> 00:06:35,028
That damned charley horse.

119
00:06:36,071 --> 00:06:40,951
Meemaw and Peepaw saw your penis.

120
00:07:04,308 --> 00:07:06,059
No. Not yet. Ow!

121
00:07:06,393 --> 00:07:07,895
You're so smart and gorgeous.

122
00:07:07,978 --> 00:07:09,897
- Now?
- Not yet. I'll tell you when.

123
00:07:09,980 --> 00:07:10,981
Just a little higher.

124
00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:13,525
- You're my princess.
- Rub softer but faster.

125
00:07:13,609 --> 00:07:15,736
Smash that pussy now! Now!

126
00:07:15,819 --> 00:07:17,905
I cherish you. I cherish you.

127
00:07:26,622 --> 00:07:28,373
- Fuck yeah.
- Yeah.

128
00:07:28,457 --> 00:07:31,752
We are the greatest couple ever.

129
00:07:31,835 --> 00:07:34,212
No one has sex like we do.

130
00:07:34,296 --> 00:07:39,551
I mean, I've never had sex like this,
but you're my first, so I don't know.

131
00:07:39,635 --> 00:07:40,636
Hey.

132
00:07:40,719 --> 00:07:44,389
I showed you that you're in my
lobster poems I wrote about you, right?

133
00:07:44,473 --> 00:07:47,684
Yeah, but, like, how amazing?

134
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:50,145
Like, oh, I don't know...

135
00:07:50,229 --> 00:07:52,105
Better than the other girls?

136
00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:55,359
You're doing it again.

137
00:07:56,026 --> 00:07:58,528
I'm not jealous. I'm just asking.

138
00:07:58,612 --> 00:08:02,491
Yeah. It starts with asking
and then you spiral.

139
00:08:05,994 --> 00:08:07,829
Are you filming us?

140
00:08:08,956 --> 00:08:11,458
You little shit!
That is a total violation.

141
00:08:11,541 --> 00:08:12,584
Not cool, Keenan.

142
00:08:12,668 --> 00:08:17,422
You respect my boundaries,
you little shit!

143
00:08:17,506 --> 00:08:22,261
Get back here! Give me that phone!

144
00:08:22,344 --> 00:08:25,722
You will learn
about emotional intelligence.

145
00:08:26,723 --> 00:08:30,727
Delete that video!
The framing isn't even good!

146
00:08:33,897 --> 00:08:35,983
Again? Really?

147
00:08:36,858 --> 00:08:40,654
- Kayla!
- Oops. Sorry. Love you.

148
00:08:40,737 --> 00:08:42,447
Who the fuck is Monica?

149
00:08:45,534 --> 00:08:48,537
<i>I do not shrink
from this responsibility.</i>

150
00:08:48,620 --> 00:08:49,871
<i>I welcome it.</i>

151
00:08:52,749 --> 00:08:55,544
<i>I do not believe that any of us...</i>

152
00:08:56,962 --> 00:09:00,257
<i>The energy, the faith, the devotion...</i>

153
00:09:00,340 --> 00:09:02,551
- Here we go.
- <i>...which we bring to this endeavor...</i>

154
00:09:02,634 --> 00:09:05,012
- Oh, yeah.
- <i>...will light our country and all...</i>

155
00:09:05,095 --> 00:09:06,346
Bring it home now.

156
00:09:06,430 --> 00:09:10,851
{\an8}<i>And the glow from that fire
can truly light the world.</i>

157
00:09:10,934 --> 00:09:12,853
<i>And so, my fellow Americans,</i>

158
00:09:12,936 --> 00:09:17,065
<i>ask not what your country
can do for you...</i>

159
00:09:18,233 --> 00:09:20,861
<i>...ask what you can do for your country.</i>

160
00:09:20,944 --> 00:09:24,031
<i>You can ring my bell</i>

161
00:09:24,114 --> 00:09:26,283
<i>Ring my bell</i>

162
00:09:27,576 --> 00:09:29,745
<i>You can ring my bell</i>

163
00:09:33,707 --> 00:09:36,126
- Principal Shankman.
- Stephanie.

164
00:09:37,252 --> 00:09:38,253
Whoo!

165
00:09:38,337 --> 00:09:40,213
Been waitin' for you.

166
00:09:41,048 --> 00:09:42,466
That outfit's amazing.

167
00:09:42,549 --> 00:09:45,552
I'm glad you reconsidered,
decided to take me up on my offer.

168
00:09:45,636 --> 00:09:47,971
- Strip, slave.
- Kinky.

169
00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:50,307
- You like that?
- I like it. I like it.

170
00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:52,392
- Are you excited?
- Oh, yes, Mistress.

171
00:09:52,809 --> 00:09:54,603
- Handcuffs.
- Handcuffs, yeah.

172
00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:57,981
- Is that a whip?
- Yes, it is.

173
00:10:02,527 --> 00:10:04,196
- See, it's an app.
- Oh.

174
00:10:04,279 --> 00:10:06,240
- It's for S and M freaks like you.
- I like it.

175
00:10:06,323 --> 00:10:07,324
I don't really understand it but...

176
00:10:07,407 --> 00:10:08,867
Yeah, 'cause you're fucking stupid.

177
00:10:08,951 --> 00:10:10,744
You know, can you do
the mommy thing again?

178
00:10:10,827 --> 00:10:12,871
The kids at school are gonna love that.

179
00:10:12,955 --> 00:10:14,373
Wait, wait, wait a minute.
Are you filming me?

180
00:10:14,456 --> 00:10:17,459
Fuck, yeah. See, I've had it with you,
Principal Shankman,

181
00:10:17,542 --> 00:10:20,128
hitting on me and the other girls.
It's gross.

182
00:10:20,212 --> 00:10:23,173
And I really don't want your pervy,
sexual harassing ass around

183
00:10:23,257 --> 00:10:24,424
for my senior year, so...

184
00:10:24,758 --> 00:10:26,426
Welcome to your retirement party.

185
00:10:26,510 --> 00:10:28,053
Young lady, take the handcuffs off.

186
00:10:28,136 --> 00:10:29,555
Oh, no, no, no.

187
00:10:29,638 --> 00:10:32,015
See, I'm in charge now,
you creepy fuck.

188
00:10:32,099 --> 00:10:33,976
Retire or this video goes viral.

189
00:10:34,560 --> 00:10:36,728
So, take the weekend,
think about what you've done.

190
00:10:36,812 --> 00:10:39,523
And I hope this teaches you
a very valuable lesson.

191
00:10:40,524 --> 00:10:43,443
Never, ever fuck with a Stifler.

192
00:10:47,698 --> 00:10:48,907
- Stephanie!
- Bye!

193
00:10:48,991 --> 00:10:51,368
Stifler! Stifler!

194
00:10:52,327 --> 00:10:53,453
You're in big trouble.

195
00:10:54,621 --> 00:10:55,622
I'm in bigger trouble.

196
00:10:56,206 --> 00:10:57,874
Are you
fucking kidding me?

197
00:10:57,958 --> 00:11:01,169
You choked on a blowjob condom
and you don't even get slammed?

198
00:11:01,253 --> 00:11:03,046
It's called a dental dam.

199
00:11:03,130 --> 00:11:04,298
Why does no one know this?

200
00:11:04,381 --> 00:11:06,550
Okay. So you use
a dental dam for safety,

201
00:11:06,633 --> 00:11:09,595
but you still fell out of a window
and you did not get laid.

202
00:11:09,678 --> 00:11:11,388
Yeah, I get it. I messed up.

203
00:11:11,471 --> 00:11:13,265
I'm sorry if I wanted my first time

204
00:11:13,348 --> 00:11:15,684
to be both safe and beautiful, okay?

205
00:11:15,767 --> 00:11:17,769
- Come on.
- Sex isn't supposed to be beautiful.

206
00:11:17,853 --> 00:11:20,647
It's supposed to be hot
and dirty and hungry!

207
00:11:20,731 --> 00:11:22,900
I am going to do it
and it is going to be beautiful, okay.

208
00:11:22,983 --> 00:11:24,776
Tough love time, Annie.
Your boyfriend's a total bro-bag.

209
00:11:24,860 --> 00:11:26,778
- Yeah.
- Jason is not a bro-bag.

210
00:11:26,862 --> 00:11:29,615
I didn't wanna say it,
but he is the basic of all bros.

211
00:11:29,698 --> 00:11:30,699
- I'm sorry.
- Guys!

212
00:11:30,782 --> 00:11:33,368
We're supposed to be having fun
and fuckin' celebrating our youth!

213
00:11:33,452 --> 00:11:35,746
Senior year, bitches!

214
00:11:38,582 --> 00:11:40,709
Back to school party!

215
00:11:53,347 --> 00:11:55,724
Students of East Great Falls!

216
00:11:55,807 --> 00:11:58,560
Welcome to the annual
Back To School Party!

217
00:12:02,648 --> 00:12:06,693
And on Monday we go back to the bullshit
banality of high school life.

218
00:12:06,777 --> 00:12:08,445
But today, the sun is out!

219
00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:10,322
The booze is flowing!

220
00:12:10,405 --> 00:12:14,201
And we're teenagers
prone to bad decisions!

221
00:12:14,743 --> 00:12:16,745
Yeah!

222
00:12:28,173 --> 00:12:30,008
Ah! Drink it down!

223
00:12:33,262 --> 00:12:34,513
East Great Falls!

224
00:12:37,891 --> 00:12:39,726
Hey, girl.

225
00:12:41,937 --> 00:12:43,272
What's good, Stifler?

226
00:12:44,898 --> 00:12:45,983
Brett McCormick.

227
00:12:46,066 --> 00:12:47,943
At a party and still conscious.
Good for you.

228
00:12:48,026 --> 00:12:49,319
You know, Stifler, I hear things.

229
00:12:49,403 --> 00:12:52,072
You've got the reputation
of being the bang of the century.

230
00:12:52,155 --> 00:12:54,074
Feels like I'm missing out.

231
00:12:54,157 --> 00:12:55,951
You know, that's a real
panty-dropper, McCormick.

232
00:12:56,034 --> 00:12:57,327
I'll tell you what.

233
00:12:57,411 --> 00:12:59,496
Not today. Not tomorrow.

234
00:12:59,580 --> 00:13:00,789
Not if you were the last man on Earth.

235
00:13:00,872 --> 00:13:03,125
Not if I even loved
the reek of Axe body spray.

236
00:13:03,208 --> 00:13:05,460
Not if I didn't already know
you have a itty-bitty little dick.

237
00:13:05,544 --> 00:13:07,129
- That's not...
- No, see, I hear things, too.

238
00:13:07,212 --> 00:13:09,881
So don't try to be clever.
That would just be really bad for you.

239
00:13:09,965 --> 00:13:12,551
Just don't throw up anywhere
or do any nonconsensual groping.

240
00:13:12,634 --> 00:13:13,927
That's your job for today.

241
00:13:14,469 --> 00:13:15,470
I believe in you.

242
00:13:18,724 --> 00:13:20,350
They're my feelings.

243
00:13:20,434 --> 00:13:22,561
You're being ridiculous! Okay?

244
00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:24,730
You hacked my phone.

245
00:13:24,813 --> 00:13:27,858
Okay, so I hacked my boyfriend's phone.

246
00:13:27,941 --> 00:13:29,776
Everybody does it, by the way.

247
00:13:29,860 --> 00:13:31,737
Am I right, ladies? Yes, okay?

248
00:13:31,820 --> 00:13:34,114
And I see some thirsty bitch
hitting on you.

249
00:13:34,531 --> 00:13:37,492
For the last time,
that thirsty bitch is my cousin.

250
00:13:37,576 --> 00:13:39,494
Are you telling me
people don't fuck their cousins?

251
00:13:39,578 --> 00:13:42,539
Because it happens.
Their kids have tails.

252
00:13:42,623 --> 00:13:45,083
And she asked if
you've been working out?

253
00:13:45,167 --> 00:13:47,169
Because she's my physical therapist.

254
00:13:47,252 --> 00:13:49,004
She helped me
when I blew out my knee last year.

255
00:13:49,087 --> 00:13:50,923
Wait. I vaguely remember this.

256
00:13:51,006 --> 00:13:54,426
Yeah, and you texted her
and you told her I have an STD!

257
00:13:54,509 --> 00:13:56,345
Yeah, I wanted her
to stay away from you.

258
00:13:56,428 --> 00:13:59,848
Yeah, well, she called my mom
and now my mom thinks I have syphilis.

259
00:13:59,932 --> 00:14:01,975
Well, she's gonna
be so relieved

260
00:14:02,059 --> 00:14:04,353
when she finds out you don't. Okay?

261
00:14:04,436 --> 00:14:06,605
You know, that can lead to
madness if not treated.

262
00:14:06,688 --> 00:14:07,689
Kayla!

263
00:14:07,773 --> 00:14:08,857
I'm breaking up with you.

264
00:14:09,566 --> 00:14:12,027
Tim. I love you.

265
00:14:16,198 --> 00:14:17,532
Is this a joke?

266
00:14:17,616 --> 00:14:19,743
We're in love, stupid!

267
00:14:19,826 --> 00:14:22,537
Hey, sweetie. You... You okay?

268
00:14:22,621 --> 00:14:23,747
Oh, that?

269
00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:26,750
Yeah. We just break up
so that we can make up.

270
00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:28,293
Yeah, it's just a little speed bump.

271
00:14:28,377 --> 00:14:30,170
Oh! You guys wanna go get fucked up?

272
00:14:30,254 --> 00:14:31,338
Let's go.

273
00:14:31,421 --> 00:14:33,840
- Oh.
- Okay. Whatever you want.

274
00:14:33,924 --> 00:14:35,425
That's concerning.

275
00:14:35,509 --> 00:14:36,593
Tequila!

276
00:14:40,472 --> 00:14:42,266
- <i>Hey, hey!</i>
- Hey!

277
00:14:42,349 --> 00:14:43,850
<i>Annie, what's... What's up?</i>

278
00:14:43,934 --> 00:14:47,813
I'm at this stupid party
and I was just missing you.

279
00:14:47,896 --> 00:14:49,940
Oh, okay.

280
00:14:50,190 --> 00:14:51,233
<i>That's good.</i>

281
00:14:51,316 --> 00:14:52,901
That's real good.

282
00:14:53,277 --> 00:14:55,696
In my mouth next time. Okay.

283
00:14:57,114 --> 00:14:58,115
Whoa!

284
00:14:58,198 --> 00:15:00,284
<i>I gotta go. I'll talk to you later.</i>

285
00:15:00,367 --> 00:15:02,119
Oh, okay. Well, I love...

286
00:15:03,579 --> 00:15:04,580
You.

287
00:15:05,998 --> 00:15:07,374
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm there.

288
00:15:11,378 --> 00:15:13,213
Oh, you might wanna... Okay.

289
00:15:15,257 --> 00:15:16,466
How we doin'?

290
00:15:16,550 --> 00:15:19,970
My sex-starved boyfriend
is surrounded by a bunch of college thots,

291
00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:22,973
and I'm the only 17-year-old
virgin in history!

292
00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:24,224
You are the lucky one.

293
00:15:24,308 --> 00:15:27,102
Ignorance is bliss,
my virginal friend.

294
00:15:27,185 --> 00:15:29,479
It could be days before
Tim and I are back together.

295
00:15:29,563 --> 00:15:31,815
None of us need a man
to have a healthy sex life.

296
00:15:31,899 --> 00:15:36,653
I am learning that technology has given us
incredible innovations in self-pleasure.

297
00:15:36,737 --> 00:15:39,364
And, like, whatever you're into.
External, internal,

298
00:15:39,448 --> 00:15:43,827
dildos, rabbits, wands, vibrators,
remote-controlled butt plugs, anal beads,

299
00:15:43,911 --> 00:15:45,495
- Ben Wa balls...
- Ben Wa balls?

300
00:15:45,579 --> 00:15:50,000
Oh, yeah. I have two in right now.
It is a very specific sensation.

301
00:15:50,083 --> 00:15:51,960
Ooh! Yeah.

302
00:15:54,463 --> 00:15:55,505
They're amazing.

303
00:15:55,589 --> 00:15:58,091
The knowledge that you have
something in your vagina

304
00:15:58,175 --> 00:15:59,384
is very unsettling to me.

305
00:15:59,468 --> 00:16:00,677
That is my whole point.

306
00:16:00,761 --> 00:16:03,138
I would argue that you could use
some unsettling experimentation, Annie.

307
00:16:03,889 --> 00:16:05,432
Do you have a toy?

308
00:16:05,515 --> 00:16:06,600
We don't...

309
00:16:06,892 --> 00:16:08,060
I don't do that.

310
00:16:08,143 --> 00:16:10,479
Why does she hate you?

311
00:16:10,771 --> 00:16:13,565
Guys, we're all lacking
something in the romance area.

312
00:16:13,649 --> 00:16:16,944
But I feel like, we gotta figure
this shit out. Like, it's our senior year.

313
00:16:17,486 --> 00:16:18,570
What do you mean?

314
00:16:18,987 --> 00:16:21,490
- Goal-setting.
- Okay, but what goals?

315
00:16:21,573 --> 00:16:25,035
Oh. For you, you need a guy
who appreciates your sense of humor

316
00:16:25,118 --> 00:16:26,620
and doesn't take things so personally.

317
00:16:26,703 --> 00:16:30,040
Maybe someone who's less emotional.

318
00:16:30,123 --> 00:16:31,458
Yeah, like, someone, like, way less woke.

319
00:16:31,541 --> 00:16:32,834
Not a guy who wants
to make sweet love.

320
00:16:32,918 --> 00:16:34,378
You need a guy who wants
to fuck, you know?

321
00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:36,088
Oh, my God!

322
00:16:36,171 --> 00:16:38,590
- I do need someone who wants to fuck!
- There you go.

323
00:16:38,674 --> 00:16:40,259
Okay, my turn, my turn. Do me.

324
00:16:40,342 --> 00:16:42,719
Oh. Yeah, that's pretty simple.
You need someone smart.

325
00:16:42,803 --> 00:16:44,221
Yeah, you need someone
who understands you,

326
00:16:44,304 --> 00:16:47,432
who would like social consciousness,
but also like integrity.

327
00:16:47,516 --> 00:16:48,934
Mmm. Yeah, like, someone a little kinky.

328
00:16:49,017 --> 00:16:51,395
I like it. Okay. What about Steph?

329
00:16:51,979 --> 00:16:54,523
Me? Oh, I am so good.

330
00:16:54,606 --> 00:16:57,693
Oh, sweetie, sorry,
but you need some serious work.

331
00:16:57,776 --> 00:16:59,361
What? Excuse me?

332
00:16:59,444 --> 00:17:01,863
- What exactly do I need?
- Annie, take it.

333
00:17:01,947 --> 00:17:03,657
- A nice guy.
- Mmm.

334
00:17:03,740 --> 00:17:08,078
Someone who wants to be around you
and buys thoughtful presents

335
00:17:08,161 --> 00:17:09,913
and asks about your day.

336
00:17:16,669 --> 00:17:18,629
Okay. What about Annie?

337
00:17:19,172 --> 00:17:21,258
Um, to have sex with the man I love.

338
00:17:21,340 --> 00:17:23,385
Guys, these goals are totally attainable.

339
00:17:23,467 --> 00:17:25,137
- But we need a deadline.
- Homecoming.

340
00:17:25,220 --> 00:17:26,972
About a month away,
and it has the perfect theme.

341
00:17:27,055 --> 00:17:28,098
Theme?

342
00:17:28,181 --> 00:17:30,309
Your lack of school spirit
is truly disheartening.

343
00:17:30,392 --> 00:17:32,227
Ladies, come on. It's a MORP dance.

344
00:17:32,311 --> 00:17:33,353
"Prom" spelled backwards.

345
00:17:33,437 --> 00:17:35,981
We switch all the conventions,
and most importantly,

346
00:17:36,064 --> 00:17:37,149
- girls ask guys.
- Okay.

347
00:17:37,232 --> 00:17:40,861
Rule one, set a goal
to fix our romantic lives.

348
00:17:40,944 --> 00:17:43,280
Rule number two,
we support our fellow women.

349
00:17:43,363 --> 00:17:46,366
Three, we are all
accountability partners.

350
00:17:46,450 --> 00:17:48,285
And we won't let each other
get away with our usual shit.

351
00:17:48,368 --> 00:17:49,369
- Okay.
- Yes. Yes.

352
00:17:49,453 --> 00:17:52,164
- And rule four, deadline is homecoming.
- Mmm.

353
00:17:52,247 --> 00:17:53,457
- The MORP dance.
- Mmm-hmm.

354
00:17:53,540 --> 00:17:55,792
Wait, but I don't like that it's rules.

355
00:17:55,876 --> 00:17:57,044
Makes it sound like a competition.

356
00:17:57,127 --> 00:17:58,420
Well, everything is a competition.

357
00:17:59,046 --> 00:18:00,756
It's not, though. It's a pact, so...

358
00:18:00,839 --> 00:18:02,090
Ooh, a pact. Okay.

359
00:18:02,174 --> 00:18:05,469
Well, ladies, please raise your glasses
to The Girls' Rules.

360
00:18:05,552 --> 00:18:07,137
- Yes!
- Cheers.

361
00:18:07,679 --> 00:18:09,223
{\an8}<i>We have a pact!</i>

362
00:18:10,515 --> 00:18:11,850
<i>Call it classic
Reach out and grab it</i>

363
00:18:11,934 --> 00:18:13,894
<i>Super massive
Pulls like a magnet</i>

364
00:18:16,063 --> 00:18:19,650
{\an8}<i>Jumping straight out the box
You got me like whoa</i>

365
00:18:21,193 --> 00:18:24,112
<i>Well, hello
Got, got, got me like whoa</i>

366
00:18:25,030 --> 00:18:28,408
<i>Well, hello
Got, got, got me like whoa</i>

367
00:18:28,909 --> 00:18:29,910
<i>Well, hello</i>

368
00:18:34,456 --> 00:18:35,832
Okay, we start today.

369
00:18:35,916 --> 00:18:37,876
We're getting what we want,
and if anybody doesn't like it,

370
00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:39,253
they can eat a bag of dicks.

371
00:18:39,795 --> 00:18:43,298
Kind of feel like we're Charlie's Angels,
but not the Drew Barrymore one.

372
00:18:43,382 --> 00:18:45,300
The older one where no one wore bras.

373
00:18:45,384 --> 00:18:46,385
Nice.

374
00:18:48,595 --> 00:18:50,430
<i>I'm attracted
I gotta have it</i>

375
00:18:50,514 --> 00:18:52,724
<i>Super massive
Pulls like a magnet</i>

376
00:18:53,809 --> 00:18:56,603
Not to ruin this badass moment
of female empowerment,

377
00:18:56,687 --> 00:19:00,440
but look at our choices.

378
00:19:01,567 --> 00:19:03,986
You're right.
We've known these rats since elementary.

379
00:19:04,069 --> 00:19:05,779
You really think
we go to school with the perfect guy

380
00:19:05,862 --> 00:19:06,863
and just haven't noticed?

381
00:19:06,947 --> 00:19:08,073
Oh, I think exactly that.

382
00:19:08,156 --> 00:19:09,908
Look, there's over 500 guys
at East Great Falls.

383
00:19:09,992 --> 00:19:12,869
The guy you might be looking for
might be right under your oyster.

384
00:19:12,953 --> 00:19:14,037
Or at Michigan State.

385
00:19:14,121 --> 00:19:16,123
Okay, ironically,
I think that Annie out of all of us

386
00:19:16,206 --> 00:19:17,833
will probably benefit
the most from our pact.

387
00:19:17,916 --> 00:19:19,334
- Yeah?
- Especially the part

388
00:19:19,418 --> 00:19:21,169
- where we call on her bullshit.
- What bullshit?

389
00:19:21,253 --> 00:19:23,755
Okay. You wanna lose it
to Jason the D-bag?

390
00:19:23,839 --> 00:19:24,923
Here's an idea.

391
00:19:25,007 --> 00:19:27,217
Get your ass down to Michigan State
and fuck his little brains out.

392
00:19:27,759 --> 00:19:29,511
Seems simple, yet here you are.

393
00:19:31,763 --> 00:19:32,764
That was harsh.

394
00:19:32,848 --> 00:19:35,017
Yeah, rule three,
accountability partner!

395
00:19:35,100 --> 00:19:36,268
Jason's busy.

396
00:19:36,351 --> 00:19:37,644
I'm trying to plan a trip there,

397
00:19:37,728 --> 00:19:40,397
but with his school schedule,
we barely even get time to talk.

398
00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:41,899
- Yeah.
- So sad.

399
00:19:42,900 --> 00:19:44,151
Oh.

400
00:19:44,234 --> 00:19:45,319
<i>Adiós,</i> mofos.

401
00:19:47,654 --> 00:19:49,740
In the meantime,
I suggest we start training.

402
00:19:49,823 --> 00:19:52,534
In order to enjoy sex,
you need to know what you like, right?

403
00:19:52,618 --> 00:19:54,119
What're you thinking?

404
00:19:54,202 --> 00:19:56,663
I'm thinking that
we do a shopping trip.

405
00:19:58,123 --> 00:19:59,291
Oh, gotta go. Gonna be late.

406
00:20:02,169 --> 00:20:03,170
Whoa.

407
00:20:04,087 --> 00:20:05,672
Shit. Shit. Shit.

408
00:20:07,466 --> 00:20:13,680
<i>You can ring my bell
Ring my bell...</i>

409
00:20:24,650 --> 00:20:26,026
Oh.

410
00:20:27,361 --> 00:20:28,528
- Oh, my God.
- Hey.

411
00:20:28,612 --> 00:20:31,698
Are you okay? That looked really painful.

412
00:20:31,823 --> 00:20:34,660
Yeah, yeah, I'm good.
No, I'm great. I, um... I just...

413
00:20:34,743 --> 00:20:36,662
I was late for class.
It's a little schedule blunder.

414
00:20:36,745 --> 00:20:38,372
It's a pre-calc.
It should've said calc calc.

415
00:20:38,455 --> 00:20:39,539
Hence, the running.

416
00:20:39,623 --> 00:20:42,501
But you look lost,
and as Student Council Vice President,

417
00:20:42,584 --> 00:20:43,919
it's actually my obligation to help you.

418
00:20:44,002 --> 00:20:45,712
Hi. I'm Michelle.

419
00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:49,383
And I'm trying really hard
to hide my growing anxiety

420
00:20:49,466 --> 00:20:51,510
about being late for class.

421
00:20:51,593 --> 00:20:53,387
I'm Grant. Just moved here.

422
00:20:53,470 --> 00:20:55,013
Totally lost.

423
00:20:55,097 --> 00:20:57,349
And amused at your growing anxiety.

424
00:20:57,432 --> 00:20:58,475
But you're in luck.

425
00:20:58,559 --> 00:21:00,018
I am also on the way to calculus.

426
00:21:00,102 --> 00:21:02,688
I'd be more than happy
to report how you selflessly helped me,

427
00:21:02,771 --> 00:21:04,064
even though it made you late.

428
00:21:04,147 --> 00:21:06,984
And I'll be sure to leave out
the part about you, you know,

429
00:21:07,067 --> 00:21:08,235
face-slamming a door.

430
00:21:14,074 --> 00:21:15,200
Is that a Ben Wa ball?

431
00:21:15,867 --> 00:21:17,160
Yeah.

432
00:21:19,997 --> 00:21:22,040
- Three second rule.
- Okay.

433
00:21:22,124 --> 00:21:23,917
- Should we go?
- Yeah.

434
00:21:26,336 --> 00:21:29,506
A sweet treat for my sweet treat.

435
00:21:29,965 --> 00:21:32,384
What're you doing?
We broke up. Remember?

436
00:21:32,467 --> 00:21:34,386
We had a little squabble.

437
00:21:34,469 --> 00:21:36,179
Pumpkin spice or mocha?

438
00:21:36,263 --> 00:21:37,973
This is real. It's over.

439
00:21:38,056 --> 00:21:40,142
You're just not my lobster.

440
00:21:53,280 --> 00:21:54,531
Mind if I join you?

441
00:21:57,326 --> 00:22:01,413
Look. I know this is not
in any way my business,

442
00:22:01,496 --> 00:22:03,540
but I couldn't help but overhear.

443
00:22:03,624 --> 00:22:05,083
Oh, God.

444
00:22:05,167 --> 00:22:06,960
Yeah, it's pretty uncomfy.

445
00:22:07,044 --> 00:22:10,714
But I figured it might be a less pathetic
moment if you weren't sitting alone

446
00:22:10,797 --> 00:22:13,800
while your ex is still watching.

447
00:22:14,468 --> 00:22:16,136
You really wanna drive him nuts?

448
00:22:16,220 --> 00:22:18,096
Pass me that delicious pumpkin spice.

449
00:22:20,599 --> 00:22:22,517
- Who are you?
- I'm Grant.

450
00:22:22,601 --> 00:22:24,019
I'm cheering you up.

451
00:22:24,102 --> 00:22:27,231
- You're trying to steal my coffee.
- That's just an added bonus.

452
00:22:31,777 --> 00:22:34,529
- I'm Kayla.
- Nice to meet you, Kayla.

453
00:22:34,613 --> 00:22:35,614
Mmm.

454
00:22:38,533 --> 00:22:39,701
Why'd you give me the mocha one?

455
00:22:39,785 --> 00:22:41,453
You think I'm just gonna
give you pumpkin spice?

456
00:22:41,536 --> 00:22:43,497
This shit is seasonal
and I don't even know you.

457
00:22:44,164 --> 00:22:45,165
Touché.

458
00:22:47,584 --> 00:22:48,835
<i>Yeah</i>

459
00:22:55,842 --> 00:22:58,887
<i>Let everyone know
That the girls run the show</i>

460
00:23:00,138 --> 00:23:02,683
Who wants some? Yeah!

461
00:23:02,766 --> 00:23:06,311
<i>The lights are down low
Raise the curtain and go</i>

462
00:23:06,395 --> 00:23:08,647
<i>It's our big night
Hey</i>

463
00:23:08,730 --> 00:23:10,607
<i>Our big night
Ho</i>

464
00:23:10,691 --> 00:23:12,484
Who the fuck is that?

465
00:23:12,568 --> 00:23:13,735
Who's the fresh meat?

466
00:23:13,819 --> 00:23:14,987
Yeah, look at that snack.

467
00:23:15,070 --> 00:23:16,238
Nice dick!

468
00:23:16,321 --> 00:23:17,864
You spooked him. Ball!

469
00:23:18,532 --> 00:23:20,492
- No way. He's too far.
- 20 bucks.

470
00:23:20,576 --> 00:23:22,035
- I want some of that.
- You're on.

471
00:23:22,119 --> 00:23:23,370
Go on, give me some space.

472
00:23:29,084 --> 00:23:30,168
Wait for it.

473
00:23:33,088 --> 00:23:34,298
- Fuck, yeah!
- Oh shit!

474
00:23:34,381 --> 00:23:35,841
- I can't believe she actually made that.
- He might be dead.

475
00:23:35,924 --> 00:23:39,553
- You killed the snack!
- Venmo me, motherfuckers!

476
00:23:39,636 --> 00:23:43,098
<i>Girls run this
Girls run this show</i>

477
00:23:45,309 --> 00:23:48,896
Oh, my God, I... I am so sorry.

478
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:51,732
Are you okay?

479
00:23:52,774 --> 00:23:55,027
Oh, I think so.

480
00:23:55,110 --> 00:23:56,153
Whoa.

481
00:23:56,236 --> 00:23:59,907
- You good?
- Yeah, I think so.

482
00:23:59,990 --> 00:24:02,910
Um, I'm Stephanie. Stephanie Stifler.

483
00:24:02,993 --> 00:24:04,161
I'm Grant.

484
00:24:04,244 --> 00:24:06,747
Uh, your hands are so soft.

485
00:24:07,915 --> 00:24:10,375
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

486
00:24:10,459 --> 00:24:12,669
I'm looking for
the boys' lacrosse practice.

487
00:24:13,045 --> 00:24:14,046
Oh.

488
00:24:14,129 --> 00:24:16,465
The boys' practice is on the east field.

489
00:24:16,548 --> 00:24:19,259
- Yeah, I'll walk you.
- Uh, it's... It's okay.

490
00:24:21,929 --> 00:24:24,348
- Nice goal, by the way.
- It was good, right?

491
00:24:27,684 --> 00:24:29,019
You will be mine.

492
00:24:35,067 --> 00:24:36,652
Come on.

493
00:24:37,152 --> 00:24:38,445
Oh, my God.

494
00:24:38,528 --> 00:24:40,614
I am very uncomfortable right now.

495
00:24:40,697 --> 00:24:43,825
Okay. Annie, let's just
take a deep breath and calm down

496
00:24:43,909 --> 00:24:45,535
and realize that this is just a store.

497
00:24:45,619 --> 00:24:48,497
There's nothing weird or wrong
or dirty about this place.

498
00:24:48,580 --> 00:24:50,207
- You come here a lot?
- Michelle.

499
00:24:50,290 --> 00:24:51,333
- Hey, Rose.
- I guess so.

500
00:24:51,416 --> 00:24:53,585
The new VJ-VAX just came out.

501
00:24:53,669 --> 00:24:56,463
Girl, it's great for your nipples,
your tongue,

502
00:24:56,546 --> 00:24:58,465
your clitoris, any sphincter...

503
00:24:58,548 --> 00:25:00,801
She's naming so many
different body part words.

504
00:25:00,884 --> 00:25:02,302
Poor thing. You're still allowing yourself

505
00:25:02,386 --> 00:25:04,513
- to be clit-blocked by the patriarchy.
- Mmm-hmm.

506
00:25:04,596 --> 00:25:07,140
I'm so sorry.
Did I hear you say the VJ-VAX came in?

507
00:25:07,224 --> 00:25:08,308
I've just heard amazing things.

508
00:25:08,392 --> 00:25:09,476
They're all true.

509
00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:10,936
Oh, can I get a demonstration?

510
00:25:12,646 --> 00:25:14,481
- Okay. Come on.
- Oh, no.

511
00:25:17,985 --> 00:25:18,986
Oh, dear God.

512
00:25:19,069 --> 00:25:20,821
Welcome to
your sexual awakening.

513
00:25:20,904 --> 00:25:23,240
{\an8}Somewhere on this wall
lies the access point to your orgasm.

514
00:25:23,323 --> 00:25:25,909
But, to pick the right toy,
I do need a little bit of information.

515
00:25:25,993 --> 00:25:27,494
Are you an innie or an outie?

516
00:25:27,578 --> 00:25:28,620
Am I what?

517
00:25:29,705 --> 00:25:30,747
Okay.

518
00:25:30,831 --> 00:25:33,959
Why don't we use
this rubber vagina as a visual aid?

519
00:25:34,042 --> 00:25:36,461
- That's a return, but we cleaned it.
- Thanks, Rose.

520
00:25:36,545 --> 00:25:37,879
Okay, do you like this,

521
00:25:37,963 --> 00:25:39,548
- or do you like this?
- A.

522
00:25:39,631 --> 00:25:41,842
I'll... I'll... I'll just pick Option A.

523
00:25:41,925 --> 00:25:43,302
Well, that makes a lot of sense.

524
00:25:43,385 --> 00:25:45,345
Most women orgasm
through clitoral stimulation.

525
00:25:45,429 --> 00:25:46,889
- Okay.
- Actually, did you know that

526
00:25:46,972 --> 00:25:50,809
75% of women never orgasm
through intercourse alone? It's a fact.

527
00:25:50,893 --> 00:25:52,269
I'm sorry, ladies, could you just...

528
00:25:52,352 --> 00:25:53,478
You're blocking the good stuff.

529
00:25:53,562 --> 00:25:55,063
- Oh, sorry.
- Ooh!

530
00:25:55,564 --> 00:25:57,524
How about this guy?

531
00:25:57,608 --> 00:25:59,985
Hello. How are you?

532
00:26:00,694 --> 00:26:02,404
Aw, sweet baby bird.

533
00:26:02,487 --> 00:26:04,239
Let me guess. Is this your first toy?

534
00:26:04,323 --> 00:26:06,074
Yes, it is her first toy.

535
00:26:06,158 --> 00:26:08,785
That is such a special day
in a woman's life.

536
00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:10,746
Oh, sweetheart.

537
00:26:10,829 --> 00:26:13,081
I remember my first
like it was yesterday.

538
00:26:13,165 --> 00:26:14,708
The Muscle Massager 5000.

539
00:26:15,292 --> 00:26:16,752
{\an8}Still a bestseller.

540
00:26:16,835 --> 00:26:19,004
Mmm, that thing was squirt-tastic.

541
00:26:20,047 --> 00:26:23,926
{\an8}But nothing compares
to this gem right here.

542
00:26:24,968 --> 00:26:27,429
Three vibrating stimulators,

543
00:26:27,846 --> 00:26:30,682
curved tip to help you
find that elusive G-spot.

544
00:26:30,766 --> 00:26:32,559
Spoiler alert, it's in the front.

545
00:26:32,643 --> 00:26:34,645
There's a rabbit
for your itty-bitty clitty.

546
00:26:34,728 --> 00:26:37,064
And if you pee a little bit,
don't worry, it's waterproof.

547
00:26:37,147 --> 00:26:40,192
I mean, it is a beautiful time
to be alive, ladies. Am I right?

548
00:26:40,275 --> 00:26:41,401
- Yeah.
- Right.

549
00:26:41,485 --> 00:26:43,946
Wait. Call off the dogs.
The search is off.

550
00:26:44,029 --> 00:26:45,280
I found it.

551
00:26:45,822 --> 00:26:48,200
These black lacy panties are perfect.

552
00:26:48,283 --> 00:26:50,285
They're discreet. They're non-invasive.

553
00:26:50,369 --> 00:26:51,870
I agree. Those are perfect.

554
00:26:51,954 --> 00:26:55,290
And I'm so excited for the journey
that you're about to embark on.

555
00:26:55,707 --> 00:26:58,627
Godspeed, little bird. Godspeed.

556
00:27:01,630 --> 00:27:02,631
Wow.

557
00:27:02,714 --> 00:27:04,216
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

558
00:27:04,299 --> 00:27:06,426
- What? Relax.
- Relax?

559
00:27:06,510 --> 00:27:09,179
That super-weird
but strangely helpful woman

560
00:27:09,263 --> 00:27:11,390
just picked out
a vibrating undergarment for me.

561
00:27:11,473 --> 00:27:13,058
She's not weird. She's a goddess.

562
00:27:13,141 --> 00:27:15,686
And who cares?
You're never gonna see her again.

563
00:27:15,769 --> 00:27:17,020
Let's go.

564
00:27:19,481 --> 00:27:20,482
Oh.

565
00:27:20,566 --> 00:27:22,568
- Hey, honey.
- Hey, Dad.

566
00:27:22,651 --> 00:27:25,237
- Big test. Gotta study.
- You have a test already?

567
00:27:27,781 --> 00:27:28,782
Wow.

568
00:27:28,907 --> 00:27:31,743
Must be some kind of
accelerated school.

569
00:27:58,854 --> 00:28:01,773
Oh, my God.

570
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:07,321
Hi.

571
00:28:07,404 --> 00:28:10,490
Uh, I just moved in next door
and I wanted to introduce myself.

572
00:28:10,574 --> 00:28:14,578
I'm Ellen and...
Oh, come here, hon. This is my son, Grant.

573
00:28:15,120 --> 00:28:16,246
I made you a pie.

574
00:28:18,123 --> 00:28:19,958
- Come in.
- Thank you.

575
00:28:20,042 --> 00:28:22,961
<i>Babe, I... I got...
I gotta get to class.</i>

576
00:28:23,420 --> 00:28:26,173
You don't have time to knock one out?

577
00:28:26,256 --> 00:28:28,884
<i>Are you... Are you saying
you wanna have cybersex?</i>

578
00:28:28,967 --> 00:28:31,094
Because, uh, yeah, that would...

579
00:28:31,178 --> 00:28:32,971
That would... That would be dope.

580
00:28:33,055 --> 00:28:36,225
I bought something for us.

581
00:28:36,725 --> 00:28:39,853
So I just thought I'd make this
for you and your... Your wife.

582
00:28:39,937 --> 00:28:41,480
No wife, sadly. Divorced.

583
00:28:41,563 --> 00:28:44,066
- It's just me and my daughter.
- What a coincidence.

584
00:28:44,566 --> 00:28:46,360
- Me, too.
- Oh.

585
00:28:46,568 --> 00:28:48,779
What do ya say
we dig into this delicious pie?

586
00:28:48,862 --> 00:28:49,863
Apple?

587
00:28:50,113 --> 00:28:51,114
Cherry.

588
00:28:51,198 --> 00:28:52,199
Mmm.

589
00:28:52,366 --> 00:28:53,617
Still hot.

590
00:28:54,701 --> 00:28:56,954
Oh, come on. Oh, you gotta...
You gotta show me.

591
00:28:57,037 --> 00:28:58,580
You gotta show me. Please?

592
00:28:58,664 --> 00:28:59,998
Please.

593
00:29:00,082 --> 00:29:01,416
<i>Okay. Just a peek.</i>

594
00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:04,419
Oh, damn it!

595
00:29:04,503 --> 00:29:07,256
Ugh! Uh, my Wi-Fi sucks.

596
00:29:07,339 --> 00:29:11,552
Okay, all you need to know is
that they're tiny and lacy,

597
00:29:11,635 --> 00:29:14,346
and they have a remote control.

598
00:29:15,472 --> 00:29:17,766
You control your panties with that?

599
00:29:17,849 --> 00:29:21,853
<i>Oh, nice. Oh, you got...
Turn it on. Mmm-hmm.</i>

600
00:29:27,025 --> 00:29:28,735
- Oh, wow.
- Oh.

601
00:29:28,944 --> 00:29:30,237
It's so good.

602
00:29:30,320 --> 00:29:32,030
That is so good.

603
00:29:32,114 --> 00:29:34,116
Mmm.

604
00:29:34,199 --> 00:29:35,659
I'm so glad that you like it.

605
00:29:36,159 --> 00:29:39,496
Oh, I like it. I like it a lot.

606
00:29:40,831 --> 00:29:42,082
Oh, shit.

607
00:29:42,165 --> 00:29:44,418
Oh, I've never heard you cuss before.

608
00:29:45,043 --> 00:29:46,962
I like it. Can you...
Can you cuss again?

609
00:29:47,045 --> 00:29:49,381
Holy fuck.

610
00:29:54,761 --> 00:29:55,804
Mmm.

611
00:29:55,888 --> 00:29:56,889
Hmm.

612
00:29:56,972 --> 00:30:01,351
So, Kevin,
how long have you been divorced?

613
00:30:01,435 --> 00:30:02,519
Long time.

614
00:30:05,063 --> 00:30:07,900
Such a long time.

615
00:30:07,983 --> 00:30:11,361
Okay. You know, this has been great,
but I have a big test tomorrow.

616
00:30:11,445 --> 00:30:12,863
- I gotta go study for it, so...
- Oh.

617
00:30:12,946 --> 00:30:16,033
I bet Annie's studying
for the same test.

618
00:30:16,116 --> 00:30:17,951
Whoo.

619
00:30:18,619 --> 00:30:20,579
Okay. Whoa.

620
00:30:20,662 --> 00:30:22,748
- Oh, shit.
- Fantastic.

621
00:30:22,873 --> 00:30:24,458
You go to East Great Falls?

622
00:30:24,541 --> 00:30:27,252
Actually we both do.
I'm the new principal.

623
00:30:27,669 --> 00:30:28,670
Huh.

624
00:30:28,754 --> 00:30:29,755
No way.

625
00:30:29,838 --> 00:30:30,839
You know what?

626
00:30:31,381 --> 00:30:34,218
Annie loves a surprise.
We should go up and say hi to her.

627
00:30:34,301 --> 00:30:35,886
Holy fuck.

628
00:30:35,969 --> 00:30:36,970
Whoo!

629
00:30:37,137 --> 00:30:38,138
Oh, shit.

630
00:30:38,722 --> 00:30:39,890
Oh, I'm gonna pop.

631
00:30:39,973 --> 00:30:41,391
Hey, honey, you busy?

632
00:30:42,434 --> 00:30:44,102
No! Hey!

633
00:30:44,186 --> 00:30:46,271
- Just... Just chillin'.
- Well, great.

634
00:30:46,355 --> 00:30:49,149
Because I want to
introduce you to your new principal.

635
00:30:49,233 --> 00:30:50,525
This is Miss Fisher.

636
00:30:52,069 --> 00:30:53,820
- Huh.
- Hi.

637
00:30:53,904 --> 00:30:55,405
I'm gonna pop!

638
00:30:55,489 --> 00:30:58,075
<i>Oh, I'm popping! I'm popping!</i>

639
00:30:58,575 --> 00:30:59,785
- <i>Oh, I'm gonna pop.</i>
- It's been giving me trouble all day.

640
00:30:59,868 --> 00:31:01,620
Just noises coming out of there.

641
00:31:01,995 --> 00:31:04,873
You know, funny story.
Annie and I have actually already met.

642
00:31:05,415 --> 00:31:06,917
- At the library.
- Oh, yeah.

643
00:31:07,000 --> 00:31:10,254
I was checking out <i>Moby Dick</i>
and she had a cute little romance novel.

644
00:31:10,337 --> 00:31:11,463
How is that going for you?

645
00:31:11,546 --> 00:31:14,049
It's so good.

646
00:31:14,132 --> 00:31:15,300
- Good to hear.
- Yeah.

647
00:31:15,384 --> 00:31:18,220
You know, I wanna introduce you
to my son, Grant.

648
00:31:18,303 --> 00:31:19,805
Isn't he handsome?

649
00:31:20,264 --> 00:31:22,099
Nice to meet you.

650
00:31:22,516 --> 00:31:25,435
- Oh...
- I'm Grant. Nice to meet you, too.

651
00:31:27,354 --> 00:31:29,439
You guys hear that?
It's like a hum...

652
00:31:30,357 --> 00:31:31,358
Mmm...

653
00:31:31,817 --> 00:31:33,860
No, I'm not... I don't...
I don't hear anything.

654
00:31:36,446 --> 00:31:38,365
Annie. You okay?

655
00:31:38,448 --> 00:31:40,826
- Oh, I'm...
- You know what I think would be good?

656
00:31:40,909 --> 00:31:42,828
I think it would be great
if we went downstairs

657
00:31:42,911 --> 00:31:44,955
- and got Annie a hot piece of pie.
- Oh!

658
00:31:45,038 --> 00:31:46,456
Oh, God, yes!

659
00:31:46,540 --> 00:31:50,210
Great. You know, sometimes a girl
just needs something simple.

660
00:31:50,294 --> 00:31:51,503
Am I right, honey?

661
00:31:51,587 --> 00:31:53,964
Here, why don't you give me a tour?
Let's start with your bedroom.

662
00:32:05,142 --> 00:32:06,476
- It's very high tech.
- Mmm.

663
00:32:08,103 --> 00:32:09,855
- Nice to meet you, Annie.
- Mmm-hmm.

664
00:32:10,522 --> 00:32:11,523
Yeah.

665
00:32:18,530 --> 00:32:21,491
<i>This year's
Homecoming theme is so exciting.</i>

666
00:32:21,575 --> 00:32:26,580
<i>So come as you dream,
because we are having a Pajama Party...</i>

667
00:32:26,663 --> 00:32:27,831
{\an8}MORP! Whoop whoop!

668
00:32:27,915 --> 00:32:29,583
That's "prom" spelled backwards.

669
00:32:29,666 --> 00:32:33,086
<i>Uh, instead of tuxedos and gowns,
put on your PJs and onesies!</i>

670
00:32:33,170 --> 00:32:34,421
<i>That's crazy!</i>

671
00:32:34,504 --> 00:32:37,466
Now, I have the super
important responsibility

672
00:32:37,549 --> 00:32:39,509
of introducing our new leader,

673
00:32:39,593 --> 00:32:41,803
Principal Ellen Fisher.

674
00:32:42,137 --> 00:32:44,056
<i>Aw, thanks, Emmett.</i>

675
00:32:44,264 --> 00:32:45,265
<i>Hello.</i>

676
00:32:45,349 --> 00:32:48,018
<i>I bet you're pretty surprised
to see me here in this position.</i>

677
00:32:48,101 --> 00:32:49,269
- <i>Well, guess what?</i>
- Holy shit.

678
00:32:49,353 --> 00:32:50,395
<i>I'm surprised, too.</i>

679
00:32:51,063 --> 00:32:52,397
It is her. You're right.

680
00:32:52,773 --> 00:32:53,774
I told you.

681
00:32:54,733 --> 00:32:56,652
You said I'd never see her again.

682
00:32:56,735 --> 00:32:58,153
But I did.

683
00:32:58,570 --> 00:33:01,114
An hour later, in my bedroom,

684
00:33:01,198 --> 00:33:03,283
when I was using
a recently-purchased item.

685
00:33:04,493 --> 00:33:06,328
Ew, God. Private conversation.

686
00:33:06,411 --> 00:33:10,999
A strong, accomplished woman
who's very comfortable with her sexuality?

687
00:33:11,500 --> 00:33:13,835
She's, like, the perfect role model.

688
00:33:17,589 --> 00:33:22,010
<i>It seems that Principal Shankman
retired, rather abruptly.</i>

689
00:33:22,094 --> 00:33:25,430
<i>But I know
we all wish him very, very well.</i>

690
00:33:25,514 --> 00:33:28,392
<i>So you guys, have a great day.</i>

691
00:33:28,475 --> 00:33:29,768
Go, Trademakers!

692
00:33:30,102 --> 00:33:32,187
- Uh, trailblazers.
- Trailblazers. I know.

693
00:33:32,271 --> 00:33:33,772
Go, Trailblazers!

694
00:33:39,152 --> 00:33:40,237
Hey, you.

695
00:33:40,779 --> 00:33:43,323
Hi. Kayla, right?

696
00:33:46,368 --> 00:33:47,536
I got your favorite.

697
00:33:47,786 --> 00:33:49,871
Wow! Thank you. Mmm.

698
00:33:50,789 --> 00:33:52,291
It really does taste like fall.

699
00:33:54,501 --> 00:33:56,378
Oh, it so does.

700
00:33:57,212 --> 00:33:58,255
- You're so funny.
- Uh...

701
00:33:58,338 --> 00:34:00,465
I'm just gonna head to class.

702
00:34:00,549 --> 00:34:02,968
Thank you, again, very much.

703
00:34:05,637 --> 00:34:06,638
Mmm.

704
00:34:08,390 --> 00:34:10,684
Hey. Who's that guy?

705
00:34:11,267 --> 00:34:12,769
Who is, uh... Oh!

706
00:34:13,144 --> 00:34:15,188
That guy. That's Grant.

707
00:34:15,772 --> 00:34:16,773
My friend.

708
00:34:16,856 --> 00:34:18,233
My special friend.

709
00:34:18,316 --> 00:34:20,485
We just broke up three days ago.

710
00:34:20,568 --> 00:34:23,113
Tim, are you jealous?

711
00:34:23,196 --> 00:34:25,574
That is so cute.

712
00:34:25,657 --> 00:34:28,327
You know, if you ever wanted me
to drop by...

713
00:34:28,785 --> 00:34:29,785
Uh...

714
00:34:29,870 --> 00:34:32,039
We're not getting back together.

715
00:34:32,164 --> 00:34:33,164
Oh.

716
00:34:33,247 --> 00:34:35,667
Back together?
Who wants that?

717
00:34:36,877 --> 00:34:39,046
No, I'm just talking
about a little ex sex.

718
00:34:40,046 --> 00:34:41,131
Ex sex?

719
00:34:41,214 --> 00:34:43,425
How many times
did we sneak off during lunch

720
00:34:43,508 --> 00:34:44,968
and go do it at your place?

721
00:34:45,052 --> 00:34:46,510
What's a few more?

722
00:34:47,595 --> 00:34:50,349
Oh, I mean,
if you don't want to, I, you know...

723
00:34:50,432 --> 00:34:52,726
I think I have plans
with Grant anyway. So...

724
00:34:52,809 --> 00:34:54,353
Uh, lunchtime.

725
00:34:55,019 --> 00:34:56,021
My place.

726
00:35:01,443 --> 00:35:02,653
So, you guys
getting back together?

727
00:35:03,320 --> 00:35:04,905
That's how a bad bitch does it.

728
00:35:09,868 --> 00:35:11,578
She was holding my spot. Yeah.

729
00:35:14,456 --> 00:35:15,457
Hi.

730
00:35:16,416 --> 00:35:17,584
Remember me?

731
00:35:17,668 --> 00:35:19,253
- No.
- Sure you do.

732
00:35:19,336 --> 00:35:22,256
Yesterday, your room,
you were pleasuring yourself.

733
00:35:23,632 --> 00:35:25,759
Gross, don't say it like that.

734
00:35:26,343 --> 00:35:27,678
Well, how should I say it?

735
00:35:27,761 --> 00:35:29,513
Just don't say it.

736
00:35:29,596 --> 00:35:31,223
Ever. To anyone.

737
00:35:31,306 --> 00:35:34,601
Okay. I won't.
'Cause it's nobody's business.

738
00:35:34,685 --> 00:35:35,936
- Fries, please.
- Right.

739
00:35:36,687 --> 00:35:39,398
You know what, to tell you the truth,
though, I found the whole thing kind of...

740
00:35:39,481 --> 00:35:41,400
I don't know, endearing.

741
00:35:43,902 --> 00:35:45,112
I have a boyfriend.

742
00:35:45,195 --> 00:35:48,740
No, I know. I didn't get to meet him,
but he sounded really nice.

743
00:35:48,824 --> 00:35:50,450
- Eggplant taco?
- Yeah. Please. Thank you.

744
00:35:50,534 --> 00:35:54,788
Look, just because you barged into my room
while I was having a private moment

745
00:35:54,871 --> 00:35:58,250
with the love of my life,
doesn't mean you know me.

746
00:35:58,333 --> 00:35:59,418
I'm sorry.

747
00:35:59,501 --> 00:36:04,298
The "I'm about to pop, I'm popping" guy,
that's the love of your life?

748
00:36:06,717 --> 00:36:09,887
I am in a mature,
committed relationship

749
00:36:09,970 --> 00:36:12,139
and if I told Jason
the things you are saying...

750
00:36:12,222 --> 00:36:14,725
Oh, you wouldn't be too happy, pal.

751
00:36:14,808 --> 00:36:17,644
Okay. Got it. Pal.

752
00:36:18,353 --> 00:36:21,899
Look, I wish you and your Internet lover
a lifetime of happiness.

753
00:36:22,941 --> 00:36:23,942
Enjoy your lunch.

754
00:36:25,027 --> 00:36:26,320
Thank you.

755
00:36:31,366 --> 00:36:32,951
You're good at talking to boys.

756
00:36:33,035 --> 00:36:35,245
How do you start?
I'm having trouble with my opening.

757
00:36:36,747 --> 00:36:39,166
Well, the damsel-in-distress shit
usually works like a charm.

758
00:36:39,791 --> 00:36:42,461
Well, I am not doing that.

759
00:36:42,544 --> 00:36:44,046
Girl, it's amazing how dumb men can get

760
00:36:44,129 --> 00:36:46,465
when they think
we actually need them, so...

761
00:36:46,548 --> 00:36:47,674
Emmett, what up, man?

762
00:36:48,842 --> 00:36:50,052
Hello, sexy.

763
00:36:52,304 --> 00:36:54,306
Okay, why is my wet dream
hugging Emmett?

764
00:36:55,849 --> 00:36:56,850
Wait.

765
00:36:57,893 --> 00:36:59,519
You don't actually like Grant, right?

766
00:36:59,603 --> 00:37:00,979
I mean, he's not your type.

767
00:37:01,063 --> 00:37:03,357
What could you two
possibly have in common?

768
00:37:03,440 --> 00:37:05,525
Undeniable animal magnetism, baby.

769
00:37:05,859 --> 00:37:08,445
Um, I have to go to, uh...
I have a library...

770
00:37:08,528 --> 00:37:09,738
I need to go to the... I have a book.

771
00:37:09,821 --> 00:37:10,989
I gotta... Bye. I'll see you later.

772
00:37:11,073 --> 00:37:12,783
- See ya.
- Text me.

773
00:37:12,866 --> 00:37:14,868
Mmm-hmm.
Damsel in distress.

774
00:37:14,952 --> 00:37:16,578
Damsel in distress. Damsel in distress.

775
00:37:17,079 --> 00:37:18,455
That way.

776
00:38:02,374 --> 00:38:03,542
Oh, shit!

777
00:38:07,296 --> 00:38:08,297
Whoa!

778
00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:09,881
Ah...

779
00:38:09,965 --> 00:38:11,592
You, again.

780
00:38:11,675 --> 00:38:12,759
You okay?

781
00:38:15,178 --> 00:38:16,263
{\an8}Yeah.

782
00:38:16,513 --> 00:38:17,514
Whoa.

783
00:38:17,598 --> 00:38:19,808
- Hi.
- Hi.

784
00:38:20,309 --> 00:38:24,730
I'm just so fragile and delicate.

785
00:38:25,439 --> 00:38:26,440
Okay.

786
00:38:26,523 --> 00:38:27,524
Wow.

787
00:38:28,191 --> 00:38:31,570
Your neck is very muscly.

788
00:38:31,653 --> 00:38:33,280
- Thank you.
- Mmm-hmm.

789
00:38:33,363 --> 00:38:36,033
I think maybe we should
get you some medical attention.

790
00:38:36,116 --> 00:38:37,701
- Okay.
- Okay.

791
00:38:40,913 --> 00:38:42,205
Mind if I join you?

792
00:38:42,748 --> 00:38:43,749
Hey.

793
00:38:44,124 --> 00:38:46,793
What? Uh, no. Why?

794
00:38:46,877 --> 00:38:48,837
Oh, come on.
We don't even talk anymore.

795
00:38:48,921 --> 00:38:50,839
Yeah. Not since fifth grade,

796
00:38:50,923 --> 00:38:53,967
when you told everyone
I wet my pants at recess.

797
00:38:54,676 --> 00:38:55,719
But you did.

798
00:38:56,136 --> 00:38:57,846
No, it was a malfunctioning
water fountain.

799
00:38:57,930 --> 00:38:58,972
Oh, right. Okay.

800
00:38:59,056 --> 00:39:00,807
Look, I'm reading, all right?

801
00:39:00,891 --> 00:39:03,143
And I know this isn't a practice
you're familiar with,

802
00:39:03,227 --> 00:39:04,770
but it's a nonverbal cue

803
00:39:04,853 --> 00:39:08,148
which says I'm enjoying some
solitary time, so, maybe don't bother me.

804
00:39:08,232 --> 00:39:11,151
Okay, well I kind of feel bad about
the whole wetting-the-pants thing, now.

805
00:39:11,818 --> 00:39:12,861
Yeah, you should.

806
00:39:15,489 --> 00:39:17,282
Hey, the guy you were talking to, Grant.

807
00:39:18,242 --> 00:39:19,326
You guys friends?

808
00:39:19,576 --> 00:39:23,038
Uh, we've only been roommates at band camp
the last seven summers,

809
00:39:23,121 --> 00:39:24,122
so, uh, yeah.

810
00:39:24,206 --> 00:39:26,375
- Yeah, we're friends.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Grant's in band?

811
00:39:26,458 --> 00:39:27,459
No shit.

812
00:39:27,542 --> 00:39:30,087
Yeah. He's an incredibly
talented saxophone player.

813
00:39:30,170 --> 00:39:31,463
- Boring.
- No.

814
00:39:31,546 --> 00:39:35,092
Sax is the sexiest wind instrument.
So it's not boring.

815
00:39:35,175 --> 00:39:37,970
Okay. What are his hobbies?
What's he like?

816
00:39:38,053 --> 00:39:40,472
Okay, you haven't
spoken to me in like nine years,

817
00:39:40,556 --> 00:39:43,600
so why don't you
go ask Grant these questions?

818
00:39:43,684 --> 00:39:45,561
Okay, look, Emmett,
I'm kinda turning over a new leaf.

819
00:39:46,186 --> 00:39:49,773
I'm looking to date
a different type, someone nice.

820
00:39:49,856 --> 00:39:52,234
And anyway, my charms of seduction
don't seem to be working on him,

821
00:39:52,317 --> 00:39:54,736
so I was thinking that,
I don't know, you'd help me out.

822
00:39:54,820 --> 00:39:58,365
You want me to help trick
my good friend Grant into liking you?

823
00:39:58,740 --> 00:39:59,783
Yeah, that's pretty much it.

824
00:39:59,908 --> 00:40:00,909
Hmm.

825
00:40:01,076 --> 00:40:03,954
Just so he can be another notch
on your lipstick case?

826
00:40:04,037 --> 00:40:06,748
Okay, news flash.
I don't have a lipstick case.

827
00:40:06,832 --> 00:40:08,959
And neither does anyone
under the age of 80, so...

828
00:40:09,042 --> 00:40:10,919
Look, dude, are you gonna
help me or what?

829
00:40:11,336 --> 00:40:13,088
Well, I foresee
a couple of problems.

830
00:40:13,171 --> 00:40:14,172
What?

831
00:40:14,256 --> 00:40:17,134
Well, Grant, he's got this
whole good taste thing.

832
00:40:17,217 --> 00:40:19,094
Yeah, and then...
And then there's my integrity.

833
00:40:19,177 --> 00:40:24,141
I'm reluctant to help trick
my friend into a romance with a dementor.

834
00:40:26,685 --> 00:40:27,686
What's that?

835
00:40:27,769 --> 00:40:30,397
Dark creatures that
consume human happiness.

836
00:40:30,480 --> 00:40:31,607
It's from <i>Harry Potter.</i>

837
00:40:31,690 --> 00:40:33,859
Wow, you are such a fucking nerd.

838
00:40:37,404 --> 00:40:38,697
Look, I'll give you 20 bucks.

839
00:40:40,449 --> 00:40:42,576
How dare you?
You know, this guy's a friend.

840
00:40:42,659 --> 00:40:44,995
It's $100 minimum.

841
00:40:48,206 --> 00:40:49,416
Better be worth it.

842
00:40:50,667 --> 00:40:52,294
Hey, I think we need a nurse.

843
00:40:52,377 --> 00:40:54,630
Injured student. Code Blue!

844
00:40:54,796 --> 00:40:55,797
Huh?

845
00:40:55,881 --> 00:40:56,882
No...

846
00:40:56,965 --> 00:40:58,800
No, no, no. No Code Blue.
I'm fine. Really, I'm fine.

847
00:40:58,884 --> 00:41:00,010
Grant, what happened? Are you okay?

848
00:41:00,093 --> 00:41:01,094
I've got this, Principal Fisher.

849
00:41:01,178 --> 00:41:02,471
Grant, put her in this chair, all right?
I'll get her to the nurse.

850
00:41:02,554 --> 00:41:04,640
- Here we go. You're good.
- No, no, no. I...

851
00:41:04,723 --> 00:41:06,016
- Hey, take good care of her.
- Good work.

852
00:41:06,099 --> 00:41:07,351
- But, uh...
- Oh, my God,

853
00:41:07,434 --> 00:41:09,061
your hair smells so beautiful.

854
00:41:10,938 --> 00:41:12,606
Seriously, it's fine.
You don't have to push me.

855
00:41:12,689 --> 00:41:14,942
No, no, no, we're not taking
any chances here, all right?

856
00:41:15,025 --> 00:41:16,735
Not with the Academic
Decathlon captain.

857
00:41:16,818 --> 00:41:18,362
We need you this weekend
against Parkway High.

858
00:41:18,445 --> 00:41:21,073
- You watch the Academic Decathlon?
- Of course.

859
00:41:21,156 --> 00:41:23,575
Are you the guy that's always
holding up signs and cheering?

860
00:41:23,659 --> 00:41:25,869
Yeah. Yeah, that's me. Oliver.

861
00:41:25,953 --> 00:41:27,788
Ollie, if you're nasty.

862
00:41:27,871 --> 00:41:29,414
Okay, I'm gonna ignore
that last part.

863
00:41:29,498 --> 00:41:32,334
Listen, Principal Fisher
and her son, are they close?

864
00:41:32,417 --> 00:41:34,127
Yeah. Yeah. Real modern family.

865
00:41:34,211 --> 00:41:35,629
Single mom, only child.

866
00:41:36,129 --> 00:41:38,173
And you're her student aide.

867
00:41:38,257 --> 00:41:40,008
Do you need any help in the office?

868
00:41:40,092 --> 00:41:41,134
Yes!

869
00:41:41,218 --> 00:41:42,219
Great.

870
00:41:54,022 --> 00:41:55,023
Wow.

871
00:41:55,107 --> 00:41:56,608
- That was...
- Yum.

872
00:41:56,692 --> 00:41:59,486
- That was, um... Different.
- Oh.

873
00:41:59,570 --> 00:42:01,530
- Um...
- I like.

874
00:42:02,948 --> 00:42:04,116
Yeah.

875
00:42:04,199 --> 00:42:09,746
Yeah, something about
the, uh, impulsive nature of our meeting

876
00:42:09,830 --> 00:42:13,041
made me feel a little wild.
Didn't it?

877
00:42:13,375 --> 00:42:14,668
Oh, yeah.

878
00:42:14,751 --> 00:42:17,546
Casual hookups, no strings, no emotions.

879
00:42:17,629 --> 00:42:18,964
I am so good.

880
00:42:19,423 --> 00:42:21,258
Whoo. I'm gonna head out.

881
00:42:21,341 --> 00:42:22,759
Wait. You don't have to go yet.

882
00:42:22,843 --> 00:42:26,263
Oh, no. Super fun frolic.
Bang ya later. Maybe not. Who knows?

883
00:42:26,346 --> 00:42:27,681
Gotta go back to school.

884
00:42:41,028 --> 00:42:44,281
Oh, so you just happened to be
in the library during your free period?

885
00:42:44,781 --> 00:42:47,242
- Well, that's one way to say hello.
- Sorry.

886
00:42:47,326 --> 00:42:49,912
Hi, Grant. I'm afraid
now is not a good time

887
00:42:49,995 --> 00:42:51,371
to inappropriately flirt with me,

888
00:42:51,455 --> 00:42:53,749
not only because I have a boyfriend,

889
00:42:53,832 --> 00:42:58,045
but also because my fascist French teacher
also decided he likes daily pop quizzes.

890
00:42:58,128 --> 00:43:00,964
So I guess I'll be spending
my free periods learning French.

891
00:43:01,048 --> 00:43:03,800
Damn. You're really feeling yourself, huh?

892
00:43:03,884 --> 00:43:06,178
I'm just sitting here,
minding my business.

893
00:43:06,261 --> 00:43:07,804
Oh, so you're not gonna flirt with me?

894
00:43:07,888 --> 00:43:09,181
I mean, I'm not, now.

895
00:43:09,264 --> 00:43:10,891
Took all the fun out of it.

896
00:43:13,101 --> 00:43:14,102
All right, wait.

897
00:43:14,186 --> 00:43:17,147
I get it. Okay. You have a boyfriend.

898
00:43:17,231 --> 00:43:18,232
I'm sorry.

899
00:43:18,690 --> 00:43:22,653
It's just fun seeing you
get all flustered and worked up.

900
00:43:23,320 --> 00:43:25,197
You know, I actually speak French.

901
00:43:25,739 --> 00:43:27,991
I'd be more than happy
to help you prep for the quizzes.

902
00:43:28,075 --> 00:43:30,911
Just friends. Study buddies.

903
00:43:30,994 --> 00:43:33,205
All right, no funny business.

904
00:43:33,288 --> 00:43:34,623
Truth is, I'm kind of lonely.

905
00:43:34,706 --> 00:43:36,792
I mean, I don't know anyone
at this school.

906
00:43:36,875 --> 00:43:39,294
You'd be doing me a favor, seriously.

907
00:43:39,711 --> 00:43:41,463
You really speak French?

908
00:43:41,546 --> 00:43:42,798
<i>Oui, oui.</i>

909
00:43:45,634 --> 00:43:46,843
Fine.

910
00:43:51,640 --> 00:43:52,808
Just study buddies.

911
00:43:52,891 --> 00:43:53,892
Of course.

912
00:44:06,405 --> 00:44:08,782
<i>A goddess on a mountain top</i>

913
00:44:10,075 --> 00:44:12,452
<i>Was burning like a silver flame</i>

914
00:44:13,829 --> 00:44:16,290
<i>The summit of beauty and love</i>

915
00:44:17,374 --> 00:44:19,251
<i>And Venus was her name</i>

916
00:44:21,128 --> 00:44:22,254
<i>She's got it</i>

917
00:44:23,755 --> 00:44:25,716
<i>Yeah, baby, she's got it</i>

918
00:44:29,136 --> 00:44:31,096
<i>I'm your Venus</i>

919
00:44:31,179 --> 00:44:33,974
<i>I'm your fire
At your desire</i>

920
00:44:36,143 --> 00:44:38,687
<i>Well, I'm your Venus</i>

921
00:44:38,770 --> 00:44:41,773
<i>I'm your fire
At your desire</i>

922
00:44:43,901 --> 00:44:47,070
<i>Her weapons were her crystal eyes</i>

923
00:44:47,779 --> 00:44:50,240
<i>Making every man mad</i>

924
00:44:51,158 --> 00:44:54,286
<i>Black as the dark night she was</i>

925
00:44:54,369 --> 00:44:57,080
<i>Got what no one else has</i>

926
00:44:58,874 --> 00:44:59,958
<i>She's got it</i>

927
00:45:01,251 --> 00:45:03,295
<i>Yeah, baby, she's got it</i>

928
00:45:06,965 --> 00:45:08,634
<i>I'm your Venus</i>

929
00:45:08,717 --> 00:45:11,887
<i>I'm your fire
At your desire</i>

930
00:45:13,597 --> 00:45:15,933
<i>Well, I'm your Venus</i>

931
00:45:16,016 --> 00:45:19,102
<i>I'm your fire
At your desire</i>

932
00:45:31,240 --> 00:45:33,533
<i>Yeah, baby, she's got it</i>

933
00:45:35,035 --> 00:45:37,329
<i>Yeah, baby, she's got it</i>

934
00:45:38,789 --> 00:45:40,290
<i>She's got it</i>

935
00:45:40,374 --> 00:45:44,127
This whole walk home I've been putting off
asking you to my mom's party.

936
00:45:44,211 --> 00:45:46,129
You know, teachers, old people,

937
00:45:46,213 --> 00:45:47,422
total rager.

938
00:45:47,506 --> 00:45:50,801
And it's Saturday afternoon,
as if it's for a child, so, even better.

939
00:45:50,884 --> 00:45:54,304
Uh, as fun as that sounds, I...

940
00:45:54,388 --> 00:45:58,392
See, that excitement level was exactly why
I put this off until the end of our walk.

941
00:45:58,475 --> 00:46:01,395
But lucky for me, your dad's totally
gonna make you go, anyway.

942
00:46:01,478 --> 00:46:04,064
Yeah, I think him and my mom,
like, have something going on.

943
00:46:04,147 --> 00:46:07,067
Ew.
Anyways, see you at the party.

944
00:46:07,484 --> 00:46:08,777
Wait. What?

945
00:46:09,403 --> 00:46:10,904
You're welcome.

946
00:46:12,030 --> 00:46:13,031
Ew.

947
00:46:16,994 --> 00:46:20,080
<i>I was all caught up for a while</i>

948
00:46:20,163 --> 00:46:22,124
I've dug up great stuff on Grant,
so just, uh, wait here,

949
00:46:22,207 --> 00:46:23,542
and don't steal anything. Okay?

950
00:46:23,625 --> 00:46:24,626
Great.

951
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:29,548
<i>Too bad I was acting like a child</i>

952
00:46:31,049 --> 00:46:34,177
<i>I'd rather act like the woman I am</i>

953
00:46:50,235 --> 00:46:51,820
- What the shit is this?
- Wow.

954
00:46:51,904 --> 00:46:54,907
Your grasp of the English language
continues to astound.

955
00:46:54,990 --> 00:46:58,785
Uh, wow. Well, uh, I guess I don't
redecorate as much as I should.

956
00:46:58,869 --> 00:47:00,412
Oh, hardy-fuckin'-har.

957
00:47:00,495 --> 00:47:03,165
You have a picture of me. Framed.

958
00:47:03,248 --> 00:47:06,168
I know you probably didn't notice this,
but I'm in the picture as well.

959
00:47:08,462 --> 00:47:10,130
God, we were like nine.

960
00:47:10,714 --> 00:47:12,299
Dude, why do you even have this?

961
00:47:12,382 --> 00:47:14,051
I like it. Okay?

962
00:47:14,426 --> 00:47:16,220
Look at these kids, all right?
They're friends.

963
00:47:16,303 --> 00:47:17,888
No one's judging.

964
00:47:17,971 --> 00:47:19,514
No one has their feelings hurt.

965
00:47:19,598 --> 00:47:22,559
So I keep this around.

966
00:47:23,685 --> 00:47:24,978
You got a problem with that?

967
00:47:26,271 --> 00:47:27,272
No.

968
00:47:27,356 --> 00:47:31,276
Now, if you're ready
to set your psychological sex trap,

969
00:47:31,360 --> 00:47:33,779
I've got a decade of backstory.

970
00:47:33,862 --> 00:47:36,657
I can't express how much
I don't wanna go inside.

971
00:47:36,740 --> 00:47:38,784
Okay, you know what?
It's time that you understand

972
00:47:38,867 --> 00:47:40,994
what you want doesn't really matter.

973
00:47:41,078 --> 00:47:42,454
Take me, for example.

974
00:47:42,537 --> 00:47:45,707
I wake up every morning
and I drag myself to a job that I hate.

975
00:47:45,791 --> 00:47:48,377
Ah, life lesson. Neat.

976
00:47:48,460 --> 00:47:49,878
The point is...

977
00:47:49,962 --> 00:47:53,632
I'm gonna be fine as long as
you don't cock-block me tonight.

978
00:47:53,715 --> 00:47:54,716
<i>Comprende?</i>

979
00:47:54,925 --> 00:47:55,926
Ew!

980
00:47:57,344 --> 00:47:59,846
- Daddy! Gross. Yes.
- Gross!

981
00:47:59,930 --> 00:48:00,973
Get in there and be social.

982
00:48:13,068 --> 00:48:14,069
Oh, yeah.

983
00:48:16,071 --> 00:48:17,864
It's on like <i>Donkey Kong.</i>

984
00:48:18,532 --> 00:48:19,741
- Donkey what?
- See ya later.

985
00:48:22,953 --> 00:48:24,955
Party in the house!

986
00:48:26,540 --> 00:48:28,417
- Oh, yes.
- Oh, what are you doing here?

987
00:48:28,500 --> 00:48:30,669
- No way.
- What up, bitches?

988
00:48:30,752 --> 00:48:32,713
- What?
- Is this a wake or what?

989
00:48:32,796 --> 00:48:34,923
I'm super confused.
Why are you all here right now?

990
00:48:35,007 --> 00:48:36,008
Hey, Annie.

991
00:48:36,717 --> 00:48:38,010
- Ladies.
- Hey.

992
00:48:38,093 --> 00:48:40,304
Thank you for all coming
to my mom's lame party.

993
00:48:40,387 --> 00:48:42,431
Wait. I didn't know
you guys all knew Grant that well.

994
00:48:42,514 --> 00:48:45,434
Yeah, I only bought him, like,
three pumpkin spice lattes this week.

995
00:48:45,517 --> 00:48:46,518
Right?

996
00:48:46,602 --> 00:48:49,313
Well, he, um, carried me to safety
when I broke my leg.

997
00:48:50,522 --> 00:48:52,149
- When did you... Which one?
- Break your... Yeah.

998
00:48:52,232 --> 00:48:54,151
It's much better now.
Stephanie, what are you doing here?

999
00:48:54,234 --> 00:48:55,569
- I came with Emmett.
- Who?

1000
00:48:55,652 --> 00:48:56,778
That kid. Yeah.

1001
00:48:56,862 --> 00:48:58,989
So, he's Grant's best friend
and I'm friends with Emmett,

1002
00:48:59,072 --> 00:49:00,490
so it's kind of like
Grant and I are besties.

1003
00:49:00,574 --> 00:49:01,575
- Right?
- Is it?

1004
00:49:01,658 --> 00:49:02,826
Sure.

1005
00:49:02,910 --> 00:49:04,244
Oh, and where's your boyfriend, Kayla?

1006
00:49:04,328 --> 00:49:06,496
I told you, Stephanie,

1007
00:49:06,580 --> 00:49:08,206
- we broke up.
- Mmm.

1008
00:49:08,290 --> 00:49:10,584
You keep on saying
how nonstop the sex has been, right?

1009
00:49:10,667 --> 00:49:12,127
- Yeah.
- It's been like dirty

1010
00:49:12,210 --> 00:49:13,670
and hungry, you know what I mean?

1011
00:49:13,754 --> 00:49:14,755
Okay, uh, let's have a little...

1012
00:49:14,838 --> 00:49:16,256
Can we have a little girls',
like, powwow, just outside?

1013
00:49:16,340 --> 00:49:17,382
No, I'm fine.

1014
00:49:17,466 --> 00:49:20,719
Okay, so apparently
you've all chosen Grant for the pact?

1015
00:49:20,802 --> 00:49:22,679
Yeah, he's smart and articulate.

1016
00:49:22,763 --> 00:49:23,847
Yeah, nice guy.

1017
00:49:23,931 --> 00:49:25,140
- I mean, he hasn't hit on me once.
- Hmm.

1018
00:49:25,224 --> 00:49:28,435
Have we considered
if that's because he's just not into you?

1019
00:49:28,518 --> 00:49:29,519
Screw you.

1020
00:49:29,603 --> 00:49:31,688
Rule number three,
I'm calling you on your bullshit.

1021
00:49:31,772 --> 00:49:33,649
Making Tim jealous is not your goal.

1022
00:49:33,732 --> 00:49:35,609
And as your accountability
partner, I'm just reminding you,

1023
00:49:35,692 --> 00:49:38,070
- neither is kissing up to Grant's mom.
- Oh.

1024
00:49:38,153 --> 00:49:39,821
Rule number two, we are best friends.

1025
00:49:39,905 --> 00:49:40,906
We should support each other.

1026
00:49:40,989 --> 00:49:42,741
We shouldn't let some boy
come between us.

1027
00:49:43,075 --> 00:49:44,076
Us?

1028
00:49:45,327 --> 00:49:46,995
I meant between you.

1029
00:49:47,079 --> 00:49:50,040
Right. 'Cause Emmett and I have seen you
having little French lessons with Grant.

1030
00:49:50,123 --> 00:49:51,124
Uh-huh. We've been studying.

1031
00:49:51,208 --> 00:49:52,251
"Studying."

1032
00:49:52,334 --> 00:49:53,502
I have a boyfriend.

1033
00:49:53,585 --> 00:49:56,129
God, yes, Annie, we get it. Thank you!

1034
00:49:56,213 --> 00:49:57,214
Hey!

1035
00:49:57,798 --> 00:49:58,799
Everything cool?

1036
00:49:59,299 --> 00:50:01,051
You know,
we should just table this. Okay?

1037
00:50:01,134 --> 00:50:02,135
- But...
- Tabled!

1038
00:50:02,427 --> 00:50:03,470
Uh...

1039
00:50:03,554 --> 00:50:04,972
Stifler.

1040
00:50:05,389 --> 00:50:06,807
It doesn't seem like he's that into her.

1041
00:50:06,890 --> 00:50:08,767
Hmm. I thought you didn't care.

1042
00:50:08,850 --> 00:50:10,852
I'm just making an observation.

1043
00:50:11,687 --> 00:50:12,688
Right.

1044
00:50:12,771 --> 00:50:14,439
You two, guard the stairs.

1045
00:50:14,523 --> 00:50:15,857
I'm gonna do some recon.

1046
00:50:15,941 --> 00:50:16,942
What does that mean?

1047
00:50:17,025 --> 00:50:20,153
You know, check out his room,
scope it out, smell his underwear.

1048
00:50:20,237 --> 00:50:21,655
- I don't know. Bing-bang-boom.
- What?

1049
00:50:21,738 --> 00:50:24,241
That's kind of an invasion
of his privacy.

1050
00:50:24,700 --> 00:50:26,410
- It is?
- Hmm?

1051
00:50:26,493 --> 00:50:28,328
- Oh, my God, his privacy!
- Yeah.

1052
00:50:28,412 --> 00:50:30,414
- Just guard the stairs, nerds.
- Okay.

1053
00:50:33,834 --> 00:50:34,835
Oh, boy.

1054
00:50:34,918 --> 00:50:38,088
You know, I think I'm gonna
do some recon work of my own.

1055
00:50:38,547 --> 00:50:39,881
- Okay. Bye.
- Bye.

1056
00:50:55,898 --> 00:51:00,736
{\an8}So, I do have some goodies,
but not enough to go around.

1057
00:51:00,819 --> 00:51:02,654
- Oh, I don't care if anybody...
- Hey, Annie's dad!

1058
00:51:02,738 --> 00:51:04,740
Principal Fisher.
I just wanted to tell you

1059
00:51:04,823 --> 00:51:07,910
that I am so excited to have
a strong female role model to look up to.

1060
00:51:07,993 --> 00:51:10,329
- I was thinking maybe you and I could...
- Aw! Oliver!

1061
00:51:10,412 --> 00:51:11,413
Hmm.

1062
00:51:11,872 --> 00:51:13,248
- Uh, uh...
- Hi. Principal Fisher

1063
00:51:13,332 --> 00:51:15,584
doesn't wanna talk to you anymore,
but I would love to.

1064
00:51:15,667 --> 00:51:18,003
- Do you wanna hear my JFK?
- Who are you?

1065
00:51:18,086 --> 00:51:19,755
Something's been
missing out of my life.

1066
00:51:19,838 --> 00:51:21,965
You know, like a void
that needs to be filled, even.

1067
00:51:23,133 --> 00:51:24,176
- Ow!
- Oh, sorry.

1068
00:51:24,259 --> 00:51:26,136
Okay, look,
I sense some resistance

1069
00:51:26,220 --> 00:51:27,596
and I really don't know
what the problem is,

1070
00:51:27,679 --> 00:51:29,806
so if you could just, like,
clear that up for me, that'd be great.

1071
00:51:29,890 --> 00:51:30,891
Okay.

1072
00:51:30,974 --> 00:51:34,061
Uh, well, for one, you hit me in the head
with a lacrosse ball, so...

1073
00:51:34,144 --> 00:51:35,562
Dude, it was an accident.

1074
00:51:35,646 --> 00:51:36,813
- Was it?
- Yeah.

1075
00:51:36,897 --> 00:51:38,649
Mmm... I mean, I saw the Venmo.

1076
00:51:38,732 --> 00:51:41,485
You got paid 20 bucks
for knocking out the new hot guy.

1077
00:51:41,568 --> 00:51:43,737
Well, have you seen yourself?

1078
00:51:44,780 --> 00:51:46,198
I forgot something in my room.

1079
00:51:46,281 --> 00:51:47,908
- I'll be back.
- All right.

1080
00:51:47,991 --> 00:51:50,077
- Nice ass.
- Yeah, thank you.

1081
00:51:52,120 --> 00:51:53,538
Oh, shit.

1082
00:51:54,957 --> 00:51:56,083
What the...

1083
00:52:00,921 --> 00:52:02,089
Oh.

1084
00:52:04,258 --> 00:52:05,551
Grant!

1085
00:52:05,634 --> 00:52:06,718
Hi.

1086
00:52:07,302 --> 00:52:08,554
Hey, you're, uh...

1087
00:52:08,637 --> 00:52:09,972
You're missing the party.

1088
00:52:10,055 --> 00:52:13,100
Yeah, I'm, uh, kinda hiding, actually.

1089
00:52:13,183 --> 00:52:17,938
That girl Stephanie is so extra
and kind of terrifying.

1090
00:52:18,021 --> 00:52:19,022
Oh.

1091
00:52:19,481 --> 00:52:22,359
Uh, for your information,
guys are obsessed with her

1092
00:52:22,442 --> 00:52:25,153
and she also happens to be
a really great person.

1093
00:52:25,237 --> 00:52:26,238
So, um...

1094
00:52:26,655 --> 00:52:27,906
I didn't mean anything by it.

1095
00:52:27,990 --> 00:52:30,284
She's really nice. Just not my type.

1096
00:52:31,577 --> 00:52:32,661
You are.

1097
00:52:33,787 --> 00:52:35,956
Uh...

1098
00:52:37,499 --> 00:52:40,794
I'm sorry. I know you have a boyfriend,

1099
00:52:40,877 --> 00:52:44,006
and I'm not supposed to
say or feel anything,

1100
00:52:44,089 --> 00:52:46,592
and I don't wanna ruin
the only friendship I have.

1101
00:52:46,884 --> 00:52:48,010
No.

1102
00:52:48,260 --> 00:52:49,261
No?

1103
00:53:05,027 --> 00:53:06,320
Oh, hi.

1104
00:53:07,154 --> 00:53:08,822
Breaking news, bitches!

1105
00:53:10,115 --> 00:53:11,116
Oh, shit.

1106
00:53:17,289 --> 00:53:18,290
Whoa!

1107
00:53:20,000 --> 00:53:21,001
Oh, shit.

1108
00:53:24,713 --> 00:53:26,632
Wow. It is like <i>Donkey Kong.</i>

1109
00:53:27,925 --> 00:53:28,926
I'm okay.

1110
00:53:36,516 --> 00:53:37,517
Ow.

1111
00:53:39,102 --> 00:53:40,771
Okay, what the hell was that?

1112
00:53:40,854 --> 00:53:42,940
Let me answer that question
with another question.

1113
00:53:43,023 --> 00:53:44,483
What the hell is this?

1114
00:53:44,566 --> 00:53:45,567
Annie!

1115
00:53:45,984 --> 00:53:47,694
You said that you weren't
even interested in Grant.

1116
00:53:47,778 --> 00:53:49,696
First of all, shh.
Second of all, delete that.

1117
00:53:49,780 --> 00:53:51,531
- I... I didn't do anything.
- "I didn't do..."

1118
00:53:51,615 --> 00:53:53,825
You were practically eating his face.

1119
00:53:53,909 --> 00:53:56,078
- That's dramatic.
- What'd it taste like?

1120
00:53:56,161 --> 00:53:57,621
Guys! I am sticky and embarrassed

1121
00:53:57,704 --> 00:53:59,748
and I just got rejected by a man
for the first time in my life.

1122
00:53:59,831 --> 00:54:01,083
- Oh, boo-hoo!
- Go cry me a river.

1123
00:54:01,166 --> 00:54:02,167
Let's just call it a day.

1124
00:54:02,251 --> 00:54:03,627
- Cool?
- Fine.

1125
00:54:03,710 --> 00:54:05,420
Fine. I don't even care!

1126
00:54:06,672 --> 00:54:09,091
Hey, Annie. Can we talk real quick?

1127
00:54:09,174 --> 00:54:12,636
- Uh, nothing to talk about.
- Really?

1128
00:54:12,719 --> 00:54:15,889
How about the girl doing a photo shoot
in my lacrosse uniform

1129
00:54:15,973 --> 00:54:18,016
or I don't know,
how we kissed and you hit me?

1130
00:54:18,100 --> 00:54:19,268
We did not kiss.

1131
00:54:20,018 --> 00:54:21,019
You kissed me.

1132
00:54:21,311 --> 00:54:22,980
Unannounced. Without permission.

1133
00:54:23,063 --> 00:54:25,566
Come on. You gave me permission
with your face.

1134
00:54:26,525 --> 00:54:29,194
You gave me kiss face.
It was... It was like...

1135
00:54:29,778 --> 00:54:31,947
- Oh, my face did not do that.
- Yeah.

1136
00:54:32,030 --> 00:54:33,031
- Yes, it did.
- It did not.

1137
00:54:33,115 --> 00:54:34,908
- That's exactly what it did.
- I'm... I'm just gonna go home.

1138
00:54:34,992 --> 00:54:36,493
- Okay.
- So it was good seeing you.

1139
00:54:37,786 --> 00:54:38,829
- You live that way.
- I live that way.

1140
00:54:38,912 --> 00:54:40,372
- Yup.
- I knew that.

1141
00:55:19,202 --> 00:55:20,579
<i>Bonjour.</i>

1142
00:56:13,257 --> 00:56:14,466
No, no, no.

1143
00:56:14,883 --> 00:56:16,009
No, no, no.

1144
00:56:16,468 --> 00:56:18,011
You don't like Grant.

1145
00:56:18,095 --> 00:56:20,472
You love Jason.

1146
00:56:30,232 --> 00:56:32,693
Nope. Nope, nope, nope.

1147
00:56:36,697 --> 00:56:38,490
Uh, biology is this way.

1148
00:56:38,574 --> 00:56:39,700
I'm going to see Jason.

1149
00:56:39,783 --> 00:56:41,535
This waiting around is making me crazy.

1150
00:56:41,618 --> 00:56:44,538
Wait. Are you cutting class?
You never cut class.

1151
00:56:44,621 --> 00:56:46,665
Some things are more important.
He's only three hours away.

1152
00:56:46,748 --> 00:56:49,126
I can get there, bang it out,
get my head straight,

1153
00:56:49,209 --> 00:56:50,502
be back before dinner.

1154
00:56:50,586 --> 00:56:52,838
- Annie, are you talking about...
- Sex!

1155
00:56:52,921 --> 00:56:55,924
I'm going to have sex
with the man that I love.

1156
00:56:56,008 --> 00:56:57,175
Yo, girl, go get you some!

1157
00:56:57,259 --> 00:56:58,635
No glove, no love!

1158
00:56:58,719 --> 00:57:01,555
Okay! I'm so excited for you.

1159
00:57:02,139 --> 00:57:03,640
Let me get this straight.

1160
00:57:03,724 --> 00:57:06,226
You went from Tim's girlfriend
to his side piece.

1161
00:57:07,352 --> 00:57:09,479
And you're happy with that?
Isn't that kind of like a demotion?

1162
00:57:09,563 --> 00:57:11,315
No, you don't get it. It's casual.

1163
00:57:11,398 --> 00:57:12,774
Girl, I invented casual.

1164
00:57:12,858 --> 00:57:14,067
That's not what you're doing.

1165
00:57:14,151 --> 00:57:15,527
What you're doing is
pretending it's casual

1166
00:57:15,611 --> 00:57:17,446
so you can still fuck the guy you like.

1167
00:57:18,488 --> 00:57:20,449
- Oh, my God.
- There ya go.

1168
00:57:20,532 --> 00:57:22,659
I do still like him.

1169
00:57:22,743 --> 00:57:28,081
Our casual, no-strings-attached sex
is neither casual nor without strings!

1170
00:57:28,165 --> 00:57:30,334
- There are feelings!
- Does Tim know that?

1171
00:57:30,751 --> 00:57:33,211
No. No, he does not, but he will.

1172
00:57:33,921 --> 00:57:35,797
He's gonna know right now.

1173
00:57:36,673 --> 00:57:38,425
- Okay.
- Kayla?

1174
00:57:40,093 --> 00:57:41,762
- She okay?
- Who knows?

1175
00:57:41,845 --> 00:57:44,765
Well, get this.
Annie just left school to go see Jason.

1176
00:57:44,848 --> 00:57:46,433
No shit! Good for her.

1177
00:57:46,516 --> 00:57:48,352
- You know what this means, though?
- What?

1178
00:57:48,435 --> 00:57:49,436
Annie wins.

1179
00:57:50,646 --> 00:57:53,523
She does. After she does the deed,
she's fulfilled her goal.

1180
00:57:53,607 --> 00:57:55,108
Kayla is still obsessed with Tim.

1181
00:57:55,192 --> 00:57:56,777
I'm absolutely nowhere.

1182
00:57:56,860 --> 00:57:59,238
And Grant seems to be the only guy
in school who doesn't lust after you.

1183
00:58:00,280 --> 00:58:01,531
It's not over yet.

1184
00:58:01,615 --> 00:58:02,783
Oh, come on, Steph.

1185
00:58:02,866 --> 00:58:04,243
The MORP is in a week.

1186
00:58:04,326 --> 00:58:06,036
Champions are made in the last quarter.

1187
00:58:06,662 --> 00:58:08,247
Game just got interesting.

1188
00:58:13,335 --> 00:58:15,837
Hey. Hey. Glad you came.

1189
00:58:15,921 --> 00:58:18,215
- Um, I need to talk to you.
- Okay.

1190
00:58:18,799 --> 00:58:20,050
Why are we in the library?

1191
00:58:20,133 --> 00:58:21,552
Nobody ever comes back here.

1192
00:58:21,635 --> 00:58:23,095
Dangerous...

1193
00:58:23,178 --> 00:58:24,638
Sexy, huh?

1194
00:58:27,224 --> 00:58:28,267
Oh, you hate it.

1195
00:58:28,350 --> 00:58:29,476
God, I'm sorry.

1196
00:58:29,560 --> 00:58:31,436
It was such a stupid idea.

1197
00:58:31,520 --> 00:58:34,356
Look, I respect you
and I just want you to know

1198
00:58:34,439 --> 00:58:37,109
that this is always a safe space.

1199
00:58:39,111 --> 00:58:40,696
All right, pants off, make it quick.

1200
00:58:40,779 --> 00:58:42,281
I'm sure that will not be a problem. Oh!

1201
00:58:44,825 --> 00:58:46,618
Principal Fisher? Oh.

1202
00:58:46,952 --> 00:58:48,245
Sorry. I can come back.

1203
00:58:48,328 --> 00:58:49,496
No, that's okay.

1204
00:58:49,580 --> 00:58:51,915
Well, it's kind of a weird situation.

1205
00:58:51,999 --> 00:58:54,334
- See, I made this pact...
- No, no, no.

1206
00:58:54,418 --> 00:58:55,460
Sorry.

1207
00:58:55,586 --> 00:58:56,587
Um...

1208
00:58:56,920 --> 00:58:58,130
I made this pact with my friends

1209
00:58:58,213 --> 00:59:00,716
that I would try and date somebody
who I'm really proud of

1210
00:59:00,799 --> 00:59:02,009
and who really gets me,

1211
00:59:02,092 --> 00:59:04,803
but I feel like in doing so,
I've kind of lost sight of myself.

1212
00:59:04,887 --> 00:59:07,014
I mean, I thought that Grant
was the guy that I wanted

1213
00:59:07,097 --> 00:59:10,601
because he's smart
and he's cute and he's socially conscious.

1214
00:59:10,684 --> 00:59:12,436
- Great job on that, by the way.
- Thanks.

1215
00:59:12,519 --> 00:59:14,271
But I don't even know who I've become.

1216
00:59:14,354 --> 00:59:18,442
Like, I'm pretending to be weak
and helpless to manipulate a man?

1217
00:59:18,525 --> 00:59:20,110
What would Ruth Bader Ginsburg say?

1218
00:59:20,193 --> 00:59:21,320
I mean, I don't need a man
to complete me.

1219
00:59:21,403 --> 00:59:24,239
I'm a strong, smart,
independent woman. Right?

1220
00:59:24,323 --> 00:59:27,159
Michelle, there is nothing wrong
with wanting to be in a relationship.

1221
00:59:27,242 --> 00:59:29,578
Everybody deserves a little romance.

1222
00:59:29,661 --> 00:59:32,039
But I do think
you're barking up the wrong tree.

1223
00:59:32,122 --> 00:59:34,124
I mean, if Grant were
the right guy for you,

1224
00:59:34,207 --> 00:59:36,793
you wouldn't have to be
anything but yourself.

1225
00:59:36,877 --> 00:59:39,880
It does, however,
make me think of another young man,

1226
00:59:39,963 --> 00:59:43,508
a young man who happened
to score 1,590 on his SAT,

1227
00:59:43,592 --> 00:59:45,969
a young man who volunteers
every single weekend.

1228
00:59:47,137 --> 00:59:48,764
You're describing my ideal mate.

1229
00:59:48,847 --> 00:59:52,309
He is obsessed with presidential history.

1230
00:59:52,392 --> 00:59:53,810
Are you shitting me, Principal Fisher?

1231
00:59:53,894 --> 00:59:56,104
I shit you not, Michelle.
Watch your language.

1232
00:59:56,188 --> 00:59:59,858
His name is Oliver Hawthorn,
and you work with him every single day,

1233
00:59:59,942 --> 01:00:02,402
and he clearly has
an obvious crush on you.

1234
01:00:02,819 --> 01:00:04,321
Now get out, I'm very busy.

1235
01:00:04,905 --> 01:00:06,365
Right. Okay.

1236
01:00:07,950 --> 01:00:09,159
- Bye-bye.
- Thank you.

1237
01:00:09,826 --> 01:00:12,204
Oh, well, I mean, what can you expect?

1238
01:00:12,287 --> 01:00:13,747
She's been through a lot.

1239
01:00:19,836 --> 01:00:23,090
So, um, I hear you're into presidents.

1240
01:00:23,715 --> 01:00:25,300
Uh, just Kennedy.

1241
01:00:26,593 --> 01:00:29,763
"My fellow Americans,
ask not what your country can do for you.

1242
01:00:29,846 --> 01:00:31,098
"Ask what you can do for your country."

1243
01:00:31,890 --> 01:00:33,141
It's not
a very good impression,

1244
01:00:33,225 --> 01:00:34,226
but I mean, I'm trying to perfect it.

1245
01:00:34,309 --> 01:00:36,770
- Um, I... I actually have to go.
- Okay.

1246
01:00:36,853 --> 01:00:38,438
- Right now.
- Oh.

1247
01:00:38,522 --> 01:00:39,523
Bye.

1248
01:00:42,484 --> 01:00:43,777
Oh, man.

1249
01:00:43,860 --> 01:00:46,572
Since we broke up,
the sex just keeps getting better, right?

1250
01:00:49,575 --> 01:00:52,327
Hey, what's up? You okay?

1251
01:00:54,246 --> 01:00:57,791
What are the odds, uh,
this isn't just meaningless sex to you?

1252
01:01:01,086 --> 01:01:05,340
What are the odds, um,
that you're actually in love with me,

1253
01:01:06,425 --> 01:01:08,552
but you're just afraid
of your feelings

1254
01:01:08,635 --> 01:01:13,223
and, um, deep in your heart
you wanna stay with me?

1255
01:01:19,062 --> 01:01:20,147
That's what I thought.

1256
01:01:20,981 --> 01:01:24,067
Um, I can't do this casual thing.

1257
01:01:25,694 --> 01:01:27,321
Not with you.

1258
01:01:28,030 --> 01:01:29,489
I just want more.

1259
01:01:32,284 --> 01:01:33,577
I deserve more.

1260
01:01:37,122 --> 01:01:38,206
Bye, Tim.

1261
01:01:44,922 --> 01:01:46,590
Hey, Jason, it's me.

1262
01:01:46,673 --> 01:01:49,718
I can't really talk right now,
and I know you're in class anyway,

1263
01:01:49,801 --> 01:01:51,845
but I have a surprise for you.

1264
01:01:51,929 --> 01:01:54,056
So, call me back
when you get this, okay?

1265
01:01:54,139 --> 01:01:55,807
I love you. Bye.

1266
01:01:55,891 --> 01:01:57,601
<i>Don't let this slip away</i>

1267
01:01:57,684 --> 01:01:59,853
<i>Maybe this road leads to Rome</i>

1268
01:01:59,937 --> 01:02:02,648
<i>But, baby, you make me feel at home</i>

1269
01:02:02,731 --> 01:02:06,485
<i>Together we're unstoppable
It's undeniable</i>

1270
01:02:06,568 --> 01:02:09,196
<i>Let's go, go, go, go</i>

1271
01:02:09,279 --> 01:02:12,449
<i>Let's go all the way tonight</i>

1272
01:02:12,532 --> 01:02:15,786
<i>Take me all the way tonight</i>

1273
01:02:15,869 --> 01:02:18,747
<i>Baby, we can make this last</i>

1274
01:02:18,830 --> 01:02:21,792
<i>Nothing's gonna hold us back</i>

1275
01:02:21,875 --> 01:02:25,128
<i>Let's take it all the way tonight</i>

1276
01:02:25,212 --> 01:02:28,465
<i>Leave it up to fate tonight</i>

1277
01:02:28,548 --> 01:02:29,591
Thanks, buddy.

1278
01:02:29,675 --> 01:02:32,094
<i>So let's go all the way tonight</i>

1279
01:02:32,177 --> 01:02:34,221
Up top, baby. Hit me! One more.

1280
01:02:34,304 --> 01:02:37,975
<i>Let's take it all the way tonight</i>

1281
01:02:38,058 --> 01:02:41,520
<i>Leave it up to fate tonight</i>

1282
01:02:41,603 --> 01:02:44,898
<i>So let's go all the way tonight</i>

1283
01:02:44,982 --> 01:02:49,027
{\an8}<i>Let's go all the way tonight, tonight</i>

1284
01:02:51,613 --> 01:02:54,283
I'm gonna pop.
I'm gonna pop. I'm gonna pop.

1285
01:02:54,366 --> 01:02:55,909
Oh, I'm popping!

1286
01:02:56,535 --> 01:02:57,536
Oh.

1287
01:02:57,619 --> 01:02:59,413
Um, Annie.

1288
01:02:59,538 --> 01:03:01,415
Are you kidding me?

1289
01:03:01,582 --> 01:03:03,292
Uh...

1290
01:03:03,375 --> 01:03:04,543
It's not what it looks like.

1291
01:03:04,626 --> 01:03:05,877
- It's not?
- No.

1292
01:03:05,961 --> 01:03:07,379
Um, she's my math tutor.

1293
01:03:07,462 --> 01:03:08,714
Was she tutoring you right now?

1294
01:03:08,797 --> 01:03:10,048
- I'm sorry.
- Oh, my God!

1295
01:03:10,132 --> 01:03:11,550
- Just calm down.
- Calm down?

1296
01:03:11,633 --> 01:03:14,052
You think telling me to calm down
is gonna make me calm down?

1297
01:03:14,136 --> 01:03:15,637
Well, you're acting a little hysterical.

1298
01:03:15,721 --> 01:03:18,724
Am I? Am I a little bit hysterical?

1299
01:03:19,933 --> 01:03:21,810
That really hurt bad!

1300
01:03:24,479 --> 01:03:25,731
Wait here.

1301
01:03:32,195 --> 01:03:34,156
Annie. Annie.

1302
01:03:34,239 --> 01:03:36,199
Annie, honey. Honey. Honey.

1303
01:03:36,283 --> 01:03:39,328
Sorry. Annie, um,
talk to you one second?

1304
01:03:39,411 --> 01:03:40,579
- What?
- Please.

1305
01:03:40,662 --> 01:03:42,205
What do you wanna say?

1306
01:03:42,623 --> 01:03:45,792
I don't know.
Long distance relationships are rough.

1307
01:03:45,876 --> 01:03:47,085
Oh, is that right?

1308
01:03:47,169 --> 01:03:49,087
Yeah, I mean,
there's so many hot chicks here.

1309
01:03:49,713 --> 01:03:51,673
You're hot too, obviously.
Of course.

1310
01:03:51,757 --> 01:03:53,383
It's just, you know,
you're not college-hot.

1311
01:03:53,467 --> 01:03:54,718
Your brain is hot.

1312
01:03:54,801 --> 01:03:57,971
Jason, I'm breaking up with you.

1313
01:03:58,055 --> 01:04:01,099
I only came here because I felt guilty.

1314
01:04:01,183 --> 01:04:03,185
I like someone else.

1315
01:04:03,268 --> 01:04:06,438
He kissed me and I liked it,
and it freaked me out.

1316
01:04:06,521 --> 01:04:07,522
Okay.

1317
01:04:07,606 --> 01:04:10,525
So, I thought if I came here,
if I saw you,

1318
01:04:10,609 --> 01:04:14,071
if we made love, then my feelings for you
would come rushing back.

1319
01:04:15,322 --> 01:04:16,657
When I saw you with her,

1320
01:04:17,783 --> 01:04:20,953
after the anger, you know what I felt?

1321
01:04:22,621 --> 01:04:23,830
I felt relief.

1322
01:04:25,207 --> 01:04:26,208
Some dude kissed you?

1323
01:04:27,960 --> 01:04:28,961
What?

1324
01:04:30,963 --> 01:04:33,173
You're just really not
who I wanted you to be.

1325
01:04:35,467 --> 01:04:37,594
Wow, that was... That was rough.

1326
01:04:40,138 --> 01:04:42,266
Nice towel, douchebag.

1327
01:04:56,405 --> 01:04:57,406
Oh.

1328
01:04:57,864 --> 01:04:58,865
Oh.

1329
01:04:59,074 --> 01:05:00,576
Annie, have you been crying?

1330
01:05:01,201 --> 01:05:02,703
Oh, honey.

1331
01:05:02,786 --> 01:05:04,538
Oh, I think I know what this is.

1332
01:05:04,955 --> 01:05:05,956
Annie, don't worry.

1333
01:05:06,039 --> 01:05:08,500
Ellen's not trying to become
your new mommy.

1334
01:05:08,834 --> 01:05:12,170
- Oh, my God.
- Honey, that's not why she's upset.

1335
01:05:12,254 --> 01:05:15,841
Clearly, she's mortified 'cause she just
walked in on us about to have sex.

1336
01:05:16,383 --> 01:05:18,343
Yeah. Yeah. What she said.

1337
01:05:18,635 --> 01:05:22,598
Oh. No, this is...
This is just a casual thing.

1338
01:05:22,681 --> 01:05:24,516
I think the kids call it F-buddies.

1339
01:05:24,600 --> 01:05:26,184
On that note, okay.

1340
01:05:26,268 --> 01:05:28,061
Oh, God. Oh, God.

1341
01:05:31,815 --> 01:05:34,610
Annie? Can I come in.

1342
01:05:34,985 --> 01:05:36,028
Okay.

1343
01:05:49,875 --> 01:05:54,171
Annie, did, um...
Did what you see downstairs upset you?

1344
01:05:54,254 --> 01:05:56,632
Oh, no, it makes perfect sense.

1345
01:05:57,174 --> 01:05:58,926
Everyone's having sex but me.

1346
01:05:59,593 --> 01:06:00,636
Sex?

1347
01:06:00,719 --> 01:06:03,722
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to say it.

1348
01:06:05,140 --> 01:06:06,808
I broke up with Jason.

1349
01:06:08,185 --> 01:06:09,186
Oh.

1350
01:06:09,519 --> 01:06:11,021
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.

1351
01:06:12,314 --> 01:06:13,315
I'm not.

1352
01:06:15,943 --> 01:06:16,985
Oh, babe.

1353
01:06:17,069 --> 01:06:20,864
You are the most
incredible person I know.

1354
01:06:20,948 --> 01:06:23,909
You're so smart, you're so funny.

1355
01:06:24,785 --> 01:06:26,245
You are so beautiful.

1356
01:06:26,870 --> 01:06:28,580
I don't need a pep talk, Dad.

1357
01:06:28,664 --> 01:06:31,416
That Jason never deserved you.

1358
01:06:33,543 --> 01:06:38,006
And I never liked the guy, so there!

1359
01:06:38,090 --> 01:06:39,216
Wait. Really?

1360
01:06:39,299 --> 01:06:41,802
No. He was a total brobag.

1361
01:06:44,012 --> 01:06:45,514
Mmm.

1362
01:06:45,931 --> 01:06:47,182
I love you, Dad.

1363
01:06:48,308 --> 01:06:49,601
I love you too, babe.

1364
01:07:00,904 --> 01:07:03,448
- Grant. Hey-hey.
- Hey.

1365
01:07:03,532 --> 01:07:06,535
So, I'm having a little gathering
at my place tonight,

1366
01:07:06,618 --> 01:07:07,661
if you wanna come.

1367
01:07:08,370 --> 01:07:10,539
Cool. Have you seen Annie, by chance?

1368
01:07:11,290 --> 01:07:12,291
Oh.

1369
01:07:12,374 --> 01:07:14,960
Oh, well, she went to go
visit her boyfriend at college yesterday.

1370
01:07:15,043 --> 01:07:17,129
Yeah, they're probably
still banging it out.

1371
01:07:17,212 --> 01:07:18,213
But back to my thing.

1372
01:07:18,297 --> 01:07:21,842
So, my favorite saxophone
player, Vladimir Ullich, he's amazing...

1373
01:07:21,925 --> 01:07:24,052
- Are... Are you being serious?
- What?

1374
01:07:24,136 --> 01:07:26,972
Vladimir Ullich is, like,
my favorite musician of all time.

1375
01:07:27,055 --> 01:07:28,140
- Is it really?
- Yeah.

1376
01:07:28,223 --> 01:07:30,267
What... What are the odds
of that happening?

1377
01:07:30,350 --> 01:07:32,269
- Not high.
- Well, you should stop by then.

1378
01:07:32,352 --> 01:07:34,980
It's, like, a listening party.
Like, we'll play it all night.

1379
01:07:35,063 --> 01:07:37,024
I mean, I'm quirky, so...

1380
01:07:37,107 --> 01:07:38,483
You know what? Cool.

1381
01:07:38,567 --> 01:07:39,651
- Oh, great.
- Great.

1382
01:07:39,735 --> 01:07:40,903
- Great. I'll see you there.
- All right

1383
01:07:42,070 --> 01:07:43,280
<i>Baby, she's drop dead gorgeous</i>

1384
01:07:43,363 --> 01:07:44,531
<i>Drop dead</i>

1385
01:07:44,615 --> 01:07:47,117
Oh. My bad. I'll see you.

1386
01:07:47,200 --> 01:07:48,827
- Okay.
- Okay. Bye.

1387
01:07:49,995 --> 01:07:51,622
<i>Baby, she's drop dead gorgeous</i>

1388
01:07:51,705 --> 01:07:52,831
<i>Drop dead</i>

1389
01:07:52,915 --> 01:07:54,041
Freeze!

1390
01:07:54,291 --> 01:07:55,417
I got eyes on Annie.

1391
01:07:55,709 --> 01:07:56,710
Quad, stat.

1392
01:07:58,128 --> 01:08:00,505
- Well, well, well, look who it is.
- What's this?

1393
01:08:00,756 --> 01:08:02,382
- Well, well, well, look...
- I already did that.

1394
01:08:02,466 --> 01:08:03,800
- Damn it.
- Annie!

1395
01:08:03,884 --> 01:08:06,470
You disappear, lose your virginity,
no call, no text?

1396
01:08:06,553 --> 01:08:07,930
Like, you ghosted us.

1397
01:08:08,847 --> 01:08:10,849
Sorry. I've just been dead.

1398
01:08:11,391 --> 01:08:12,726
Because of all the sex?

1399
01:08:12,851 --> 01:08:14,603
Girl, this is a big-ass moment for you.

1400
01:08:14,728 --> 01:08:16,771
Shit!

1401
01:08:16,855 --> 01:08:19,233
Okay, we'll talk tonight? But you all
are coming to my party tonight, right?

1402
01:08:19,315 --> 01:08:20,650
- Yeah, duh.
- Okay. Great.

1403
01:08:20,734 --> 01:08:23,153
And since Annie has had
sweet Freeform TV sex,

1404
01:08:23,237 --> 01:08:25,697
I'll swoop in and seduce
the lovely Grant.

1405
01:08:25,781 --> 01:08:28,449
- Yes! What's up! Whoo!
- Yeah!

1406
01:08:28,533 --> 01:08:31,203
- Mama had sex!
- She ain't a virgin!

1407
01:08:32,371 --> 01:08:34,206
{\an8}<i>We make the beat go
boom, boom, boom</i>

1408
01:08:34,288 --> 01:08:35,958
<i>Boom, boom, boom</i>

1409
01:08:36,041 --> 01:08:39,168
<i>I like the sound it makes
Boom, boom, boom</i>

1410
01:08:39,253 --> 01:08:41,337
You do this kind of thing
every weekend?

1411
01:08:41,421 --> 01:08:44,382
Stifler's parties are the bedrock
on which East Great Falls was built.

1412
01:08:44,507 --> 01:08:47,886
And tonight, we're using the party gods
to seduce the new guy.

1413
01:08:47,970 --> 01:08:50,305
Wow. You need to sacrifice
a virgin or something?

1414
01:08:50,389 --> 01:08:51,765
No, don't worry, you're safe.

1415
01:08:51,848 --> 01:08:53,308
Okay, so we thought of everything, right?

1416
01:08:53,391 --> 01:08:55,894
- Grant's favorite music, snacks, drinks?
- Yeah.

1417
01:08:55,978 --> 01:08:57,479
I mean, I'm even wearing
his favorite color.

1418
01:08:57,688 --> 01:08:59,605
- You look beautiful.
- Thanks.

1419
01:08:59,982 --> 01:09:01,525
- He's a lucky guy.
- I know.

1420
01:09:02,234 --> 01:09:03,235
Oh.

1421
01:09:04,778 --> 01:09:06,029
Here you go.

1422
01:09:06,863 --> 01:09:08,198
What... What's this?

1423
01:09:08,739 --> 01:09:10,701
Wait, I pay you
and you buy me something?

1424
01:09:11,493 --> 01:09:12,703
That's fucking stupid.

1425
01:09:12,786 --> 01:09:15,747
- The usual response is, "Thank you."
- Mmm.

1426
01:09:20,002 --> 01:09:21,253
It's a lipstick case.

1427
01:09:23,505 --> 01:09:25,507
On, uh...
On which to make notches.

1428
01:09:27,759 --> 01:09:29,636
It's a present, a thoughtful one.

1429
01:09:31,596 --> 01:09:33,765
- I also wrapped it.
- Yeah, and you...

1430
01:09:33,849 --> 01:09:35,183
- And you wrapped it. Uh...
- Whoo!

1431
01:09:36,685 --> 01:09:38,854
Well, my girls are here
so I should... I should go.

1432
01:09:40,396 --> 01:09:41,857
- Sure.
- Yeah.

1433
01:09:42,774 --> 01:09:43,775
Hey, hey. Uh...

1434
01:09:45,569 --> 01:09:46,612
Good luck with Grant.

1435
01:09:47,362 --> 01:09:49,656
Emmett, thank you. For everything.

1436
01:09:50,489 --> 01:09:53,076
And my present. I love it.

1437
01:09:57,247 --> 01:09:59,708
What up, bitches!

1438
01:09:59,791 --> 01:10:01,293
Welcome to Bang-Grant Palooza!

1439
01:10:01,543 --> 01:10:03,337
- Ow.
- Hi, boo-boo, how are you?

1440
01:10:03,420 --> 01:10:05,047
Hey, you know, being a good winner

1441
01:10:05,130 --> 01:10:07,049
is just as important
as being a good loser, Steph.

1442
01:10:07,132 --> 01:10:08,759
- Oh, you're throwing shade?
- Way to read a room.

1443
01:10:09,343 --> 01:10:11,178
Guys, when did this
turn into a competition?

1444
01:10:11,261 --> 01:10:13,680
This was never supposed to be
about us competing for a boy.

1445
01:10:13,764 --> 01:10:15,474
Yeah, this was supposed
to make me feel better.

1446
01:10:16,099 --> 01:10:17,643
I don't feel better.

1447
01:10:17,768 --> 01:10:20,979
Now you're gonna smash Grant
when he really likes Annie.

1448
01:10:22,105 --> 01:10:23,398
- What?
- Uh, yeah.

1449
01:10:23,815 --> 01:10:24,900
When I was in his room,

1450
01:10:24,983 --> 01:10:27,694
he told her he liked her
and then he kissed her.

1451
01:10:27,778 --> 01:10:29,780
Okay, well you made it
sound like it was the other way around.

1452
01:10:29,863 --> 01:10:31,406
I can be a little extra sometimes.

1453
01:10:31,490 --> 01:10:32,658
Yeah, no shit!

1454
01:10:32,866 --> 01:10:34,201
- Hey, Emmett!
- What's up, man?

1455
01:10:34,284 --> 01:10:36,453
I mean, he's cute,
but he's not worth this.

1456
01:10:36,787 --> 01:10:38,372
- I'm out, guys.
- Ladies, hey.

1457
01:10:38,789 --> 01:10:40,707
- Look who I found.
- Hey.

1458
01:10:42,876 --> 01:10:44,419
Oh. Uh...

1459
01:10:45,045 --> 01:10:46,171
What do you think of Annie?

1460
01:10:46,505 --> 01:10:47,506
She's great.

1461
01:10:48,298 --> 01:10:51,593
I mean, she's cool, smart, kind, funny.

1462
01:10:51,677 --> 01:10:53,887
Awkward, but in a really
entertaining way.

1463
01:10:53,971 --> 01:10:57,349
- Is she here?
- Oh. No, no, no, but she will be. Right?

1464
01:10:57,432 --> 01:11:00,018
Uh, can you guys just,
like, talk for a sec?

1465
01:11:00,727 --> 01:11:01,728
I know. I know.

1466
01:11:07,276 --> 01:11:08,777
Oh, my God!

1467
01:11:09,152 --> 01:11:12,739
- You are tightly wound. Wow.
- Oh, my God.

1468
01:11:12,823 --> 01:11:14,074
I'm sorry.

1469
01:11:14,157 --> 01:11:16,577
- I didn't mean to scare you.
- That's okay. That's okay.

1470
01:11:16,660 --> 01:11:19,663
Your father and I
just worked up a real appetite tonight,

1471
01:11:19,746 --> 01:11:22,165
so I'm having a little ice cream.
You want some?

1472
01:11:22,249 --> 01:11:23,375
Um...

1473
01:11:23,458 --> 01:11:24,668
Sorry.

1474
01:11:25,961 --> 01:11:26,962
Um...

1475
01:11:27,588 --> 01:11:29,089
Yeah, you know what,
I'll have some ice cream.

1476
01:11:29,172 --> 01:11:30,173
Great.

1477
01:11:30,257 --> 01:11:32,134
She's not answering.

1478
01:11:32,217 --> 01:11:34,386
Well, go get her
and drag her ass here. Okay?

1479
01:11:34,678 --> 01:11:36,430
- Okay.
- Come with me.

1480
01:11:36,513 --> 01:11:38,056
Ready for some sexy saxophone?

1481
01:11:38,140 --> 01:11:39,725
- She's back.
- Let's go.

1482
01:11:40,642 --> 01:11:42,561
Hey! I need to talk to you.

1483
01:11:42,853 --> 01:11:44,938
Tim, I cannot do this right now.

1484
01:11:45,022 --> 01:11:46,023
We have to go get...

1485
01:11:46,106 --> 01:11:47,941
Kayla, please.

1486
01:11:48,317 --> 01:11:49,610
It's cool. I got this.

1487
01:11:50,777 --> 01:11:52,029
Good luck.

1488
01:11:53,280 --> 01:11:54,907
I thought there was a party tonight.

1489
01:11:55,824 --> 01:11:57,326
- Not in the mood.
- Hmm.

1490
01:11:58,869 --> 01:12:00,245
Can I talk to you about something?

1491
01:12:00,329 --> 01:12:02,205
Should I be afraid of
what you're about to say?

1492
01:12:02,539 --> 01:12:05,292
I can never tell. I just let it fly.

1493
01:12:05,375 --> 01:12:08,045
Here's the thing.
I've noticed that you've been upset

1494
01:12:08,128 --> 01:12:10,339
and my son has also been upset.

1495
01:12:10,422 --> 01:12:13,926
And I wonder if you're both upset
about the same thing.

1496
01:12:23,268 --> 01:12:25,687
- <i>What can I help you with?</i>
- Call Annie.

1497
01:12:25,854 --> 01:12:27,773
<i>Here's what I found on the web for Fannie.</i>

1498
01:12:27,856 --> 01:12:28,982
No, call Annie!

1499
01:12:29,066 --> 01:12:30,442
<i>Calling Manny's Pizza.</i>

1500
01:12:30,525 --> 01:12:32,694
- No! Annie!
- Wait, wait, wait, wait!

1501
01:12:35,405 --> 01:12:38,408
Gonna feel that tomorrow.

1502
01:12:38,575 --> 01:12:40,035
- <i>Hello. Manny's Pizza.</i>
- Oh, my God!

1503
01:12:40,410 --> 01:12:42,329
- <i>Hello!</i>
- Oliver?

1504
01:12:42,412 --> 01:12:44,498
- Oh, my God, please be okay.
- Hi.

1505
01:12:44,581 --> 01:12:45,874
What are you doing in front of my car?

1506
01:12:45,958 --> 01:12:47,167
I'm trying to stop you from leaving.

1507
01:12:47,626 --> 01:12:48,752
I mean, you're the only reason I came.

1508
01:12:49,211 --> 01:12:51,088
Oh, my God, that's actually really sweet.

1509
01:12:51,546 --> 01:12:53,924
- Um, I have to go get my friend now...
- Do you mind if I come with?

1510
01:12:54,007 --> 01:12:55,592
I mean, you did just
run me over with your car.

1511
01:12:56,426 --> 01:12:57,427
Uh...

1512
01:12:57,678 --> 01:12:59,179
Okay, cool. Yeah, come on, come on.

1513
01:12:59,263 --> 01:13:00,305
Oh, shit.

1514
01:13:00,389 --> 01:13:01,974
I don't like the way
you left the other day.

1515
01:13:02,057 --> 01:13:03,308
Tough shit!

1516
01:13:03,392 --> 01:13:06,979
Okay, I've got feelings and emotions.

1517
01:13:07,271 --> 01:13:10,566
I'm a little jealous
and a bit of a handful.

1518
01:13:11,191 --> 01:13:17,948
But if you can't take me
at my making-a-scene-at-a-party-ness,

1519
01:13:18,031 --> 01:13:22,744
then you don't deserve me
at my fucking-you-in-the-library-ness.

1520
01:13:23,954 --> 01:13:24,955
You're right.

1521
01:13:25,497 --> 01:13:26,790
Everything you said.

1522
01:13:27,332 --> 01:13:30,669
Truth is, I don't want you
violating my trust.

1523
01:13:31,545 --> 01:13:34,006
But I do want you.

1524
01:13:35,090 --> 01:13:37,467
You're my lobster.

1525
01:13:37,551 --> 01:13:39,136
- Holy shit.
- That's right.

1526
01:13:39,636 --> 01:13:41,013
- "You're my lobster!"
- Yeah.

1527
01:13:41,722 --> 01:13:44,808
- I didn't think you were gonna say that.
- Oh, yeah, Kayla!

1528
01:13:47,436 --> 01:13:50,689
High school is the worst.

1529
01:13:51,189 --> 01:13:53,984
It is. And you think
that it's never gonna end, but it does.

1530
01:13:54,067 --> 01:13:57,279
And when it does,
time starts to move a lot faster.

1531
01:13:57,362 --> 01:14:00,741
So when you know what you want,
you should go after it.

1532
01:14:01,074 --> 01:14:03,160
'Cause you might not get another chance.

1533
01:14:08,832 --> 01:14:10,834
Annie, get dressed. Grant is looking...

1534
01:14:10,918 --> 01:14:13,420
- Oh, Principal Fisher's here!
- In a bathrobe.

1535
01:14:13,503 --> 01:14:15,505
- Hi.
- Michelle, Oliver, is everything okay?

1536
01:14:16,256 --> 01:14:18,008
Oh. Yeah, I just didn't wanna
leave him in the car.

1537
01:14:18,091 --> 01:14:19,259
I have got a knee issue,

1538
01:14:19,343 --> 01:14:21,511
but it's not as important as love.

1539
01:14:22,179 --> 01:14:24,848
Um, Annie, Grant's at the party
and he's looking for you.

1540
01:14:24,932 --> 01:14:27,476
The whole pact is off.
We all know that he likes you.

1541
01:14:27,559 --> 01:14:29,895
- He does?
- Yeah, Annie, he does.

1542
01:14:31,063 --> 01:14:32,356
This is an incredible moment
and everything,

1543
01:14:32,439 --> 01:14:34,608
but Oliver is actually
much heavier than he looks.

1544
01:14:34,691 --> 01:14:36,026
I'm wiry but muscular.

1545
01:14:36,401 --> 01:14:37,569
- It's a family trait.
- Yeah.

1546
01:14:37,819 --> 01:14:38,820
Uh...

1547
01:14:38,904 --> 01:14:43,825
Sorry, yeah, go wait in the car.
I guess I'll change and be right out.

1548
01:14:44,493 --> 01:14:46,870
I am so excited for you for tonight.

1549
01:14:46,954 --> 01:14:50,415
Now don't you be afraid to go after Grant
just because of me and your father.

1550
01:14:50,499 --> 01:14:52,834
We're not gonna
make you guys step-siblings.

1551
01:14:52,918 --> 01:14:54,795
We both know this thing has a shelf life.

1552
01:14:54,878 --> 01:14:56,838
Besides, he took
his last Viagra this morning.

1553
01:15:00,509 --> 01:15:03,262
I'm gonna go pretend I didn't hear that,
and I'll be right out, so...

1554
01:15:03,929 --> 01:15:05,138
Okay.

1555
01:15:05,222 --> 01:15:07,808
This is... This is so good,

1556
01:15:07,891 --> 01:15:09,059
and this is...

1557
01:15:09,142 --> 01:15:10,936
Wow, but, um you know,

1558
01:15:11,019 --> 01:15:13,855
uh, we have to actually
deal with some party stuff. Right? Yeah.

1559
01:15:13,939 --> 01:15:17,901
And so if you just wanna
stay there and just really soak it all in.

1560
01:15:18,819 --> 01:15:20,445
Let's just go, okay? Let's just...

1561
01:15:21,655 --> 01:15:22,823
- Okay.
- Stay?

1562
01:15:26,577 --> 01:15:29,997
Okay. We keep Grant occupied with
his old man music until Annie gets here

1563
01:15:30,080 --> 01:15:32,082
and then boom,
big romantic moment. Got it? Great.

1564
01:15:32,165 --> 01:15:34,585
Hey, wait, wait.
I thought you liked Grant, so...

1565
01:15:34,668 --> 01:15:36,837
I just kind of liked the idea of him.

1566
01:15:36,920 --> 01:15:39,548
Look, Annie's my best friend,
and if she wants him, she gets him.

1567
01:15:40,215 --> 01:15:41,258
So maybe dating a nice guy

1568
01:15:41,341 --> 01:15:42,676
just isn't in the cards
for Stephanie Stifler.

1569
01:15:42,759 --> 01:15:45,596
Look, a queen bee walking around
like she owns the place.

1570
01:15:45,679 --> 01:15:48,724
Ooh, burn. Except I do own the place,
you fucking idiot.

1571
01:15:49,349 --> 01:15:51,184
Is this your stud for the night, Stifler?

1572
01:15:51,268 --> 01:15:52,769
I didn't think your standards
could fall any lower.

1573
01:15:53,520 --> 01:15:55,772
Well, I haven't slept with you yet,
so I got that going for me.

1574
01:15:55,856 --> 01:15:57,774
Yeah, whatever you wanna tell people.

1575
01:15:59,443 --> 01:16:02,529
McCormick, are you telling people
we hooked up?

1576
01:16:02,988 --> 01:16:04,489
I never said I don't kiss and tell.

1577
01:16:05,282 --> 01:16:06,575
- Fuck you.
- No, no.

1578
01:16:06,700 --> 01:16:08,660
Hey. You're being rude.

1579
01:16:08,744 --> 01:16:10,162
- Emmett, don't...
- No, no, no, it's okay.

1580
01:16:10,829 --> 01:16:13,957
You have five seconds to
apologize or I unleash hell.

1581
01:16:18,253 --> 01:16:19,254
Five!

1582
01:16:19,338 --> 01:16:20,339
Emmett!

1583
01:16:21,048 --> 01:16:24,468
- Wow. He, uh, hit me with his face.
- What the hell?

1584
01:16:24,676 --> 01:16:26,345
Grant, can you just watch him
for a sec? Thanks.

1585
01:16:26,428 --> 01:16:27,679
Hey, asshole!

1586
01:16:28,472 --> 01:16:29,640
I don't like bullies,

1587
01:16:29,723 --> 01:16:32,226
and I don't like misogynistic douchebags
drinking my liquor

1588
01:16:32,309 --> 01:16:33,977
and disrespecting me
in my own house.

1589
01:16:34,061 --> 01:16:35,896
I don't like you, McCormick!

1590
01:16:36,313 --> 01:16:37,564
Yes, bitch!

1591
01:16:40,859 --> 01:16:42,402
But you know who I do like?

1592
01:16:44,196 --> 01:16:45,197
Ow.

1593
01:16:47,741 --> 01:16:48,742
Hey.

1594
01:16:57,167 --> 01:16:58,752
You kissed me.

1595
01:16:59,253 --> 01:17:00,629
You stood up for me.

1596
01:17:00,963 --> 01:17:01,964
I mean, you were my wingman

1597
01:17:02,047 --> 01:17:03,882
even though you liked me
more than a wingman.

1598
01:17:04,716 --> 01:17:06,218
And you bought me a present.

1599
01:17:08,053 --> 01:17:09,513
I think I just won.

1600
01:17:20,857 --> 01:17:21,858
You Grant?

1601
01:17:23,735 --> 01:17:24,736
Do I know you?

1602
01:17:36,373 --> 01:17:37,374
Oh, no.

1603
01:17:40,711 --> 01:17:42,170
What is he doing here?

1604
01:17:43,505 --> 01:17:45,007
Yeah, man,
so there you have it.

1605
01:17:45,090 --> 01:17:46,592
Now you kind of know the people
you're dealing with.

1606
01:17:47,009 --> 01:17:48,385
What the hell are you doing?

1607
01:17:48,969 --> 01:17:50,262
Oh. Uh...

1608
01:17:50,345 --> 01:17:53,015
I just thought your new boyfriend
should know the truth.

1609
01:17:53,599 --> 01:17:56,143
Annie, did you and your friends
make a bet about me?

1610
01:17:56,226 --> 01:17:57,227
It wasn't a bet.

1611
01:17:57,936 --> 01:17:59,771
- It was a pact.
- Oh, bullshit.

1612
01:18:00,063 --> 01:18:01,106
Okay, all of these little bitches

1613
01:18:01,189 --> 01:18:02,941
competed to see who could
have sex with you first.

1614
01:18:03,025 --> 01:18:04,693
Annie texted me about it every night.

1615
01:18:04,776 --> 01:18:06,653
- It's not what it sounds like.
- Really?

1616
01:18:06,737 --> 01:18:10,782
We made a pact to go after
what each of us were missing,

1617
01:18:10,866 --> 01:18:14,870
and without knowing it,
we all kind of decided it was you.

1618
01:18:17,331 --> 01:18:20,500
And what was your thing, your pact?

1619
01:18:21,543 --> 01:18:23,420
For my first time
to be with a man I love.

1620
01:18:24,504 --> 01:18:27,674
- So that's why you went to see him.
- Yeah.

1621
01:18:27,883 --> 01:18:30,219
She's only talking to you
because she caught me with another girl.

1622
01:18:30,510 --> 01:18:31,762
You're just the fallback guy.

1623
01:18:31,845 --> 01:18:35,182
But, lucky for you,
I'm not into high school drama,

1624
01:18:35,265 --> 01:18:37,517
so you want her, you can have her.

1625
01:18:38,435 --> 01:18:39,937
- You know what?
- Whoa.

1626
01:18:40,854 --> 01:18:42,397
Annie's not yours to give.

1627
01:18:42,481 --> 01:18:44,942
And you say one more
disparaging word about her,

1628
01:18:45,025 --> 01:18:47,236
this high school kid
is gonna kick your ass.

1629
01:18:47,569 --> 01:18:49,404
Just speaking my truth, bro.

1630
01:18:49,488 --> 01:18:50,989
If she liked you
as much as you thought she did,

1631
01:18:51,073 --> 01:18:54,159
would she be driving three hours
to have sex with me?

1632
01:18:54,243 --> 01:18:56,286
No. You're just a piece of meat.

1633
01:18:57,579 --> 01:18:58,622
Whoa! Hello!

1634
01:18:58,705 --> 01:19:00,540
- My uncle's an attorney. He almost hit me.
- Shut up.

1635
01:19:00,624 --> 01:19:01,625
No. Back. Break it up.

1636
01:19:01,708 --> 01:19:02,876
I hope you guys are really happy.

1637
01:19:02,960 --> 01:19:03,961
Look, Grant, we get that you're pissed...

1638
01:19:04,044 --> 01:19:06,463
No, don't...
You paid Emmett to get dirt on me.

1639
01:19:06,546 --> 01:19:07,547
Whoa. Uh...

1640
01:19:07,839 --> 01:19:08,840
Don't.

1641
01:19:09,549 --> 01:19:12,427
You know, every person
I liked in this town lied to me.

1642
01:19:13,345 --> 01:19:14,888
And the person I liked the most

1643
01:19:15,180 --> 01:19:17,140
- chose this guy.
- Grant.

1644
01:19:17,224 --> 01:19:20,060
- Enjoy the party.
- Please don't leave. Grant.

1645
01:19:27,359 --> 01:19:29,861
<i>Why didn't you just tell us
what happened with Jason?</i>

1646
01:19:29,945 --> 01:19:31,196
Yeah.

1647
01:19:31,280 --> 01:19:32,864
I didn't know how to.

1648
01:19:33,448 --> 01:19:35,450
You guys were all
so interested in Grant.

1649
01:19:35,993 --> 01:19:37,411
I didn't wanna mess it up for you.

1650
01:19:37,494 --> 01:19:39,454
Oh, my God. You should've just told us.

1651
01:19:39,538 --> 01:19:40,998
Yeah, that's all
we would've needed, Annie.

1652
01:19:41,081 --> 01:19:42,082
Yeah.

1653
01:19:42,165 --> 01:19:44,835
I mean, you know,
this is my fault for pushing the pact.

1654
01:19:44,918 --> 01:19:46,003
No.

1655
01:19:46,086 --> 01:19:49,298
No, Steph. The pact worked.

1656
01:19:49,381 --> 01:19:52,259
I mean, you found Emmett,
who's a nice guy.

1657
01:19:52,342 --> 01:19:53,969
- He is.
- Mmm-hmm.

1658
01:19:55,178 --> 01:19:57,639
And Kayla got Tim to compromise.

1659
01:19:57,723 --> 01:19:59,975
Oh, my God. You're right.

1660
01:20:01,184 --> 01:20:05,689
And, Michelle, are you as attracted
to Oliver's mind as you are to his body?

1661
01:20:05,772 --> 01:20:10,819
Oh, he turns me on in ways
that I can't even describe.

1662
01:20:10,903 --> 01:20:12,529
See? It worked.

1663
01:20:13,322 --> 01:20:14,781
Yeah, for everyone but you.

1664
01:20:14,865 --> 01:20:16,241
No, it worked for me, too.

1665
01:20:17,618 --> 01:20:20,412
I went to Michigan State
with this image in my head,

1666
01:20:20,495 --> 01:20:25,542
and it all fell apart
because he was the wrong guy.

1667
01:20:26,084 --> 01:20:29,129
And that's big, so I'm glad we did it.

1668
01:20:30,005 --> 01:20:33,300
I mean, even if, you know,
I don't end up with Grant,

1669
01:20:33,383 --> 01:20:35,093
I'm better than I was.

1670
01:20:35,177 --> 01:20:36,178
Aw, come here.

1671
01:20:36,261 --> 01:20:37,512
Aw.

1672
01:20:37,846 --> 01:20:40,057
Little Virgin Annie.

1673
01:20:40,140 --> 01:20:42,643
- With the unshuckable oyster.
- Shut up.

1674
01:20:42,726 --> 01:20:45,896
I want in. Unshuckable oyster.

1675
01:20:45,979 --> 01:20:47,898
Get in here, Stifler.

1676
01:20:47,981 --> 01:20:49,691
Yeah, come on.

1677
01:20:49,775 --> 01:20:50,943
<i>Say what
What?</i>

1678
01:20:51,026 --> 01:20:52,027
<i>Straight from the jump</i>

1679
01:20:52,110 --> 01:20:53,612
<i>Right on the tempo
Mix it all up</i>

1680
01:20:53,695 --> 01:20:54,696
<i>Say hey
Hey</i>

1681
01:20:54,780 --> 01:20:55,822
{\an8}<i>No time to wait</i>

1682
01:20:55,906 --> 01:20:57,532
{\an8}<i>Taking your move
to a different place</i>

1683
01:20:57,616 --> 01:20:58,617
{\an8}<i>Say hey
Hey</i>

1684
01:20:58,700 --> 01:20:59,701
{\an8}<i>Do what it takes</i>

1685
01:20:59,785 --> 01:21:01,286
{\an8}<i>Make like Tay 'n' shake</i>

1686
01:21:01,370 --> 01:21:04,998
<i>Get up and go, go, go, go</i>

1687
01:21:05,082 --> 01:21:08,919
<i>Get up and go, go, go, go</i>

1688
01:21:09,002 --> 01:21:12,631
<i>Get up and go, go, go, go</i>

1689
01:21:16,051 --> 01:21:18,303
- Light the fuse.
- Copy that.

1690
01:21:19,346 --> 01:21:21,848
Mama Bear, Papa Bear,
Operation Oyster is a go.

1691
01:21:55,549 --> 01:21:56,758
This guy.

1692
01:21:58,260 --> 01:21:59,386
Hey.

1693
01:22:00,053 --> 01:22:01,972
Annie's dad's outside with a limo.

1694
01:22:02,806 --> 01:22:05,893
- What is that?
- It's a onesie, you moron.

1695
01:22:05,976 --> 01:22:08,937
- For the pajama party.
- Why do you have it?

1696
01:22:09,021 --> 01:22:10,731
Honey, you know
that I love you

1697
01:22:10,814 --> 01:22:12,566
and I'm always gonna
tell you the truth, right?

1698
01:22:13,317 --> 01:22:15,193
- I know.
- So the truth is,

1699
01:22:15,694 --> 01:22:19,656
it's time for you to stop moping
because, baby, you're a real downer.

1700
01:22:20,574 --> 01:22:23,201
Listen, happiness
doesn't just find us.

1701
01:22:23,285 --> 01:22:25,537
You gotta go and you gotta grab it.

1702
01:22:25,829 --> 01:22:26,872
Take this.

1703
01:22:28,081 --> 01:22:29,958
- Take this.
- Okay.

1704
01:22:30,959 --> 01:22:32,127
- I love you.
- What do I...

1705
01:22:32,210 --> 01:22:33,670
You'll figure it out. Or not.

1706
01:22:33,754 --> 01:22:35,672
I don't know.
I've done everything I can do.

1707
01:22:42,888 --> 01:22:43,889
<i>Okay, this is your moment, Grant,</i>

1708
01:22:43,972 --> 01:22:44,973
- <i>and you're blowing it.</i>
- <i>Mmm-hmm.</i>

1709
01:22:45,057 --> 01:22:47,267
<i>But luckily, Annie has some
pretty awesome friends...</i>

1710
01:22:47,351 --> 01:22:48,352
- <i>Thank you.</i>
- <i>Oh, you're welcome.</i>

1711
01:22:48,435 --> 01:22:50,354
<i>...who are trying to save you
from this terrible mistake.</i>

1712
01:22:50,687 --> 01:22:51,980
<i>Plus, we think you're pretty great, too.</i>

1713
01:22:52,064 --> 01:22:53,398
<i>And we sent you
a really cool onesie, so...</i>

1714
01:22:53,482 --> 01:22:54,816
<i>Okay, just shut up!</i>

1715
01:22:54,900 --> 01:22:55,943
<i>Game time, Grant.</i>

1716
01:22:56,026 --> 01:22:57,027
<i>If you really like Annie,</i>

1717
01:22:57,110 --> 01:22:58,612
<i>put on that onesie
and get in that fucking limo.</i>

1718
01:22:58,695 --> 01:22:59,696
- <i>See you soon!</i>
- <i>If you don't do it...</i>

1719
01:22:59,780 --> 01:23:00,781
<i>Gladiator!</i>

1720
01:23:11,291 --> 01:23:14,461
Hey, asshole!
Turn off the music!

1721
01:23:18,966 --> 01:23:23,011
<i>This day feels like
nothing but the right vibe</i>

1722
01:23:23,095 --> 01:23:26,932
<i>This could be the good life
Doesn't get better than...</i>

1723
01:23:27,015 --> 01:23:29,643
- Hi, darling!
- Hi.

1724
01:23:30,644 --> 01:23:31,687
Are you okay?

1725
01:23:32,479 --> 01:23:33,522
Not really.

1726
01:23:34,481 --> 01:23:36,149
I just realized you were right.

1727
01:23:36,316 --> 01:23:38,068
I've made sex too big a thing.

1728
01:23:39,027 --> 01:23:40,612
I tried to turn it into some...

1729
01:23:41,238 --> 01:23:43,740
It's for fairy tales. Stupid.

1730
01:23:43,824 --> 01:23:47,244
No. No, honestly I think you were right
about wanting it to be special.

1731
01:23:48,120 --> 01:23:50,622
Look, I never had
someone who gets me

1732
01:23:50,956 --> 01:23:52,583
and cares for me, you know, and...

1733
01:23:53,709 --> 01:23:55,419
But Emmett makes me feel
like that for the first time.

1734
01:23:56,545 --> 01:23:57,671
Stop. Stop it.

1735
01:23:57,754 --> 01:24:01,592
I mean, it's nice,
and I think tonight, we might, you know...

1736
01:24:02,801 --> 01:24:05,304
Steph, that's great.

1737
01:24:05,387 --> 01:24:06,847
Great? Doubtful.

1738
01:24:09,266 --> 01:24:11,685
Special, yeah. Yeah.

1739
01:24:11,768 --> 01:24:14,229
- Yeah. I'm happy for you.
- Thanks, babe.

1740
01:24:15,772 --> 01:24:16,773
Oh, shit.

1741
01:24:17,399 --> 01:24:19,484
Are you ready?

1742
01:24:20,068 --> 01:24:22,279
- Uh, ready for what?
- Oh, you just wait, my darling.

1743
01:24:23,113 --> 01:24:24,448
You're scaring me. What is...

1744
01:24:24,531 --> 01:24:26,241
- Where are you...
- Just stay right there.

1745
01:24:28,785 --> 01:24:30,370
<i>We're young and in love</i>

1746
01:24:31,204 --> 01:24:32,789
<i>And we're running like the wind</i>

1747
01:24:32,873 --> 01:24:34,291
<i>We got it all</i>

1748
01:24:36,793 --> 01:24:38,170
<i>We're never alone</i>

1749
01:24:38,253 --> 01:24:39,254
What?

1750
01:24:39,338 --> 01:24:42,174
<i>If we got each other
we can save the world</i>

1751
01:24:44,968 --> 01:24:48,805
<i>Explosions in the sky</i>

1752
01:24:48,972 --> 01:24:52,184
<i>I see colors fly</i>

1753
01:24:53,560 --> 01:24:55,229
<i>Old enough, old enough</i>

1754
01:24:55,562 --> 01:24:58,273
<i>Old enough to know that
we are young in love</i>

1755
01:24:58,357 --> 01:25:01,235
<i>Young in love
Young and in love</i>

1756
01:25:01,568 --> 01:25:03,153
<i>You and me, we can see</i>

1757
01:25:03,570 --> 01:25:04,780
<i>Time will stand still</i>

1758
01:25:04,863 --> 01:25:06,448
<i>If we stay young in love</i>

1759
01:25:06,531 --> 01:25:09,243
<i>Young in love
Young and in love</i>

1760
01:25:09,868 --> 01:25:11,662
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1761
01:25:11,745 --> 01:25:13,455
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1762
01:25:13,664 --> 01:25:15,457
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1763
01:25:15,916 --> 01:25:16,917
You made it.

1764
01:25:18,168 --> 01:25:19,544
You have some really great friends.

1765
01:25:21,004 --> 01:25:22,256
Seems like we both do.

1766
01:25:24,967 --> 01:25:28,428
<i>Old enough, old enough
Old enough to know that</i>

1767
01:25:28,512 --> 01:25:29,680
<i>We are young in love</i>

1768
01:25:29,763 --> 01:25:32,474
<i>Young in love
Young and in love</i>

1769
01:25:32,891 --> 01:25:36,019
<i>You and me, we can see
Time will stand still</i>

1770
01:25:36,103 --> 01:25:38,772
<i>If we stay young in love
Young in love</i>

1771
01:25:38,855 --> 01:25:40,399
I guess that's my cue.

1772
01:25:42,276 --> 01:25:44,403
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1773
01:25:44,486 --> 01:25:46,405
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1774
01:25:46,488 --> 01:25:48,365
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1775
01:25:48,448 --> 01:25:50,492
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1776
01:25:50,576 --> 01:25:52,244
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1777
01:25:52,327 --> 01:25:54,329
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1778
01:25:54,413 --> 01:25:56,164
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1779
01:25:56,248 --> 01:25:58,292
<i>Yeah, we are young and in love</i>

1780
01:25:58,375 --> 01:25:59,376
<i>Ladies and gentlemen,</i>

1781
01:25:59,459 --> 01:26:00,627
<i>Annie and Grant.</i>

1782
01:26:06,592 --> 01:26:10,137
<i>Well, she was an American girl</i>

1783
01:26:11,138 --> 01:26:13,473
<i>Raised on promises</i>

1784
01:26:14,808 --> 01:26:17,644
<i>She couldn't help thinking that there</i>

1785
01:26:17,728 --> 01:26:22,024
<i>Was a little more to life somewhere else</i>

1786
01:26:22,774 --> 01:26:25,986
<i>After all, it was a great, big world</i>

1787
01:26:26,737 --> 01:26:29,406
<i>With lots of places to run to</i>

1788
01:26:30,490 --> 01:26:33,785
<i>Yeah, and if she had to die trying</i>

1789
01:26:33,911 --> 01:26:38,999
<i>She had one little promise
she was gonna keep</i>

1790
01:26:39,625 --> 01:26:42,878
<i>Oh, yeah, all right</i>

1791
01:26:43,378 --> 01:26:44,880
<i>Take it easy, baby</i>

1792
01:26:45,339 --> 01:26:46,590
<i>Make it last all night</i>

1793
01:26:47,758 --> 01:26:54,723
<i>She was an American girl</i>

1794
01:26:55,891 --> 01:26:58,936
<i>Oh, yeah, all right</i>

1795
01:26:59,645 --> 01:27:01,146
<i>Take it easy, baby</i>

1796
01:27:01,730 --> 01:27:03,190
<i>Make it last all night</i>

1797
01:27:04,107 --> 01:27:10,030
<i>She was an American girl</i>

1798
01:27:15,285 --> 01:27:16,995
What did you do?

1799
01:27:17,079 --> 01:27:18,830
- Mmm-hmm.
- Oh, God.

1800
01:27:22,000 --> 01:27:23,168
- Okay.
- Okay, okay.

1801
01:27:23,252 --> 01:27:24,419
- Hey.
- Hey.

1802
01:27:24,503 --> 01:27:27,381
So, I... I guess they have
one more surprise for us.

1803
01:27:28,674 --> 01:27:29,675
Okay.

1804
01:27:30,050 --> 01:27:31,718
- Bye.
- Bye.

1805
01:27:32,010 --> 01:27:33,720
What's happening right now?

1806
01:27:37,432 --> 01:27:40,644
<i>I've fallen too deep</i>

1807
01:27:40,727 --> 01:27:41,979
<i>Trying to swim</i>

1808
01:27:42,062 --> 01:27:45,065
<i>The current too steep
and it's pulling me in</i>

1809
01:27:45,482 --> 01:27:47,442
<i>I can breathe</i>

1810
01:27:47,526 --> 01:27:52,030
<i>Both hands around my heart
My heart</i>

1811
01:27:52,114 --> 01:27:54,950
<i>I can still feel the heat on your skin</i>

1812
01:27:55,033 --> 01:27:58,370
<i>My lips are begging to pull you in</i>

1813
01:27:58,453 --> 01:28:00,038
<i>I can breathe</i>

1814
01:28:00,581 --> 01:28:04,585
<i>Your hands around my heart
My heart</i>

1815
01:28:04,668 --> 01:28:05,669
<i>I'mma hold the door...</i>

1816
01:28:05,752 --> 01:28:06,837
What?

1817
01:28:08,422 --> 01:28:13,802
<i>For you there is no cure...</i>

1818
01:28:15,679 --> 01:28:16,847
What are we, like...

1819
01:28:17,180 --> 01:28:18,181
Oh.

1820
01:28:18,557 --> 01:28:22,644
I made a pact, so I gotta stick to it.

1821
01:28:23,645 --> 01:28:25,230
You want your first time
to be with me?

1822
01:28:25,564 --> 01:28:28,984
Yeah. And the next few, I think.

1823
01:28:38,869 --> 01:28:42,748
Hey. This feels special to me.

1824
01:28:44,291 --> 01:28:45,542
Me, too, Annie.

1825
01:28:49,129 --> 01:28:52,382
Oliver, I wanna share
something with you,

1826
01:28:52,925 --> 01:28:54,551
something that I've never
shared with anyone else.

1827
01:28:55,969 --> 01:28:56,970
Oh.

1828
01:28:57,262 --> 01:28:58,472
You want me to use that on you?

1829
01:29:00,140 --> 01:29:01,350
On me?

1830
01:29:03,101 --> 01:29:05,604
And I want you right here, right now.

1831
01:29:06,271 --> 01:29:07,397
On Principal Fisher's desk?

1832
01:29:07,522 --> 01:29:09,650
- Yes, on her desk! Get up there!
- Okay. Okay.

1833
01:29:09,816 --> 01:29:11,193
And I know you know what I want.

1834
01:29:11,276 --> 01:29:15,322
You mean, "A man may die,
nations may rise and fall,

1835
01:29:15,405 --> 01:29:17,282
- "but an idea lives on!"
- Yes.

1836
01:29:17,366 --> 01:29:19,117
Yes!

1837
01:29:19,409 --> 01:29:21,870
<i>And we dared to go</i>

1838
01:29:23,163 --> 01:29:25,040
<i>A lover's bane</i>

1839
01:29:25,374 --> 01:29:27,292
<i>Forever will remain...</i>

1840
01:29:28,585 --> 01:29:30,087
Amazing. Shit.

1841
01:29:30,420 --> 01:29:33,048
Wow. Shit!

1842
01:29:35,425 --> 01:29:37,553
Thanks. Learned that at band camp.

1843
01:29:37,636 --> 01:29:39,012
Yeah, I don't need to know that.

1844
01:29:39,096 --> 01:29:41,557
Kiss me now. Okay?

1845
01:29:42,307 --> 01:29:43,475
Now.

1846
01:29:46,687 --> 01:29:47,896
Wait, wait, wait, hold on.

1847
01:29:47,980 --> 01:29:50,357
- I need to tell you something.
- What?

1848
01:29:50,440 --> 01:29:51,942
I've... I've never done it.

1849
01:29:52,442 --> 01:29:53,443
Me neither.

1850
01:29:54,570 --> 01:29:56,738
I mean, I've never had it
with someone special, you know?

1851
01:30:04,162 --> 01:30:05,330
{\an8}Oh.

1852
01:30:05,789 --> 01:30:06,957
{\an8}Yes!

1853
01:30:07,040 --> 01:30:08,083
Yeah?

1854
01:30:10,294 --> 01:30:12,045
- You like this?
- Oh. Yeah.

1855
01:30:12,129 --> 01:30:13,171
- This is hot.
- Yeah.

1856
01:30:13,255 --> 01:30:14,339
- Dangerous.
- Yeah.

1857
01:30:15,215 --> 01:30:18,552
A little unsanitary, but, yeah.

1858
01:30:18,635 --> 01:30:20,262
I like it here. I like you.

1859
01:30:20,345 --> 01:30:21,388
I love you.

1860
01:30:21,471 --> 01:30:25,309
You are my queen!

1861
01:30:25,392 --> 01:30:28,312
I am your queen!

1862
01:30:28,395 --> 01:30:29,396
Whoo!

1863
01:30:29,479 --> 01:30:30,856
<i>Ahoo</i>

1864
01:30:30,939 --> 01:30:32,983
<i>Stars are falling</i>

1865
01:30:33,108 --> 01:30:36,570
<i>Are we falling, too?</i>

1866
01:30:36,653 --> 01:30:41,116
<i>Ahoo, dawn is coming</i>

1867
01:30:41,325 --> 01:30:44,745
<i>What's this coming to?</i>

1868
01:30:44,828 --> 01:30:48,749
<i>On a night like this</i>

1869
01:30:48,999 --> 01:30:52,502
<i>On a night like this...</i>

1870
01:30:54,254 --> 01:30:56,632
- There's something else.
- What?

1871
01:30:59,426 --> 01:31:00,677
Oh. Oh.

1872
01:31:00,761 --> 01:31:02,095
No, don't worry if...

1873
01:31:02,179 --> 01:31:05,557
Look, whatever's going down,
down there we'll make it work. Okay?

1874
01:31:05,849 --> 01:31:07,184
- Yeah?
- I promise.

1875
01:31:07,935 --> 01:31:09,353
- Okay.
- Okay.

1876
01:31:15,275 --> 01:31:16,276
Wow.

1877
01:31:16,360 --> 01:31:18,403
Is your dad a giant?

1878
01:31:18,487 --> 01:31:19,780
Like, will it fit?

1879
01:31:19,947 --> 01:31:21,240
Here's to hoping.

1880
01:31:22,532 --> 01:31:24,243
Oh, you're my president.

1881
01:31:24,910 --> 01:31:26,161
You'll always be my president.

1882
01:31:26,328 --> 01:31:28,455
<i>Ahoo</i>

1883
01:31:28,538 --> 01:31:30,582
<i>Stars are falling</i>

1884
01:31:30,666 --> 01:31:33,877
<i>Are we falling too?</i>

1885
01:31:34,336 --> 01:31:37,798
<i>On a night like this</i>

1886
01:31:38,340 --> 01:31:42,135
<i>On a night like this</i>

1887
01:31:42,636 --> 01:31:46,598
<i>Ahoo</i>

1888
01:35:09,676 --> 01:35:11,303
Say you want this
on your permanent record.

1889
01:35:11,386 --> 01:35:13,013
I want this
on my permanent record.

1890
01:35:13,096 --> 01:35:14,264
Yeah, you do.

1891
01:35:14,348 --> 01:35:15,432
What's going on? Oh.

1892
01:35:15,724 --> 01:35:18,518
Hey, Janitor Steve.
We'll just be a minute.

1893
01:35:18,602 --> 01:35:19,811
Hi, Janitor Steve.

1894
01:35:21,897 --> 01:35:23,315
I'm gonna need a bigger mop.

1895
01:35:25,400 --> 01:35:26,693
<i>Don't touch me!</i>

1896
01:35:27,196 --> 01:35:31,871
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1896
01:35:32,305 --> 01:36:32,228
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