1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

2
00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:47,560
Hey, hey. If you're coming in
for the morning grind...

3
00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:50,405
...it's another brutal Monday out there
traffic-wise.

4
00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:54,326
The <i>2</i> is slow-and-go to the 5.
A Sig Alert is bogging down the l-10.

5
00:00:54,480 --> 00:00:58,405
And if you're on the 405 freeway,
you're probably already late for work.

6
00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:02,326
If your boss gives you a hard time about it,
have him come down here and talk to...

7
00:01:02,480 --> 00:01:03,527
- ...Rachel.
- Oh, no.

8
00:01:04,880 --> 00:01:07,406
Zing! Ha, ha. Thanks, Skip.

9
00:01:07,560 --> 00:01:10,086
But, hey, speaking of bosses,
after the break...

10
00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:14,962
...we get to meet three guys who are chasing
their dream of becoming their own bosses.

11
00:01:15,120 --> 00:01:16,167
Stay with us.

12
00:01:16,320 --> 00:01:19,642
And we're out. Very good, guys.
We're back in 90 seconds.

13
00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:25,521
Jesus Christ.
Dale, you gotta stop sweating, pal.

14
00:01:25,680 --> 00:01:28,763
- Oh, wow, you are wet.
- "Stop sweating." How do I stop sweating?

15
00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:31,491
This is a big deal.
We got everything riding on this.

16
00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:35,326
We've quit our jobs, I have three children
to think about now. How about that?

17
00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:39,166
Think about this. You do a good job now,
you're gonna make your boys very proud.

18
00:01:39,480 --> 00:01:43,530
- Girls. I have three girls, dude.
- Hmm? Right. You can't even tell at that age.

19
00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:46,047
- They basically look like potatoes with arms.
- Don't call my kids potatoes.

20
00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:48,049
- Respect the kids.
- Don't piss him off.

21
00:01:48,200 --> 00:01:49,645
- They wear pink!
- Calm him down.

22
00:01:49,800 --> 00:01:51,404
A lot of guys wear pink.

23
00:01:51,560 --> 00:01:53,722
- I have a pink polo shirt that I love.
- Come on.

24
00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:56,764
- Can we get a roll of paper towels?
- Can I get paper towels?!

25
00:01:56,920 --> 00:02:00,242
Why are you barking at people?
He's saying please, you're just barking.

26
00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:02,129
- Bad manners.
- Buddy, dry your face.

27
00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:04,089
- He's freaking out.
- It's unbelievable.

28
00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:07,483
- Can you go on without me?
- Why don't you wait in the car?

29
00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:10,007
Stop, this is gonna be easy.
You have to calm down.

30
00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:14,006
Look, Nick's gonna hit them with facts
and figures, because he's the brains, right?

31
00:02:14,160 --> 00:02:17,801
You talk about how you and your wife fucked
and made three potatoes with arms.

32
00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:20,964
You're the heart. Me,
I'll do my thing, get in where I fit in.

33
00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:23,242
- You're the soul?
- No, I'm the dick and balls.

34
00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:25,323
- Got it.
- Why would I wanna be the soul?

35
00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:28,882
- Just don't pass out. Just keep breathing.
- See? This will be easy.

36
00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:32,641
- All we have to do is be ourselves.
- Let's not. Ourselves is a Dumpster fire.

37
00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:37,089
- Let's be better. Let's try to elevate a little.
- That's a good note. Nobody be themselves.

38
00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:39,163
All right, we're back in 20 seconds.

39
00:02:39,320 --> 00:02:41,129
Hey, fellas, thanks for coming.

40
00:02:41,280 --> 00:02:44,363
- Nice to meet you.
- Good morning. How are you?

41
00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:46,727
Hey, my man. There's trouble.

42
00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:48,609
- Too much.
- Well, he went with it.

43
00:02:48,760 --> 00:02:51,081
- Dale Arbus.
- Pleasure to meet you, man.

44
00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:53,447
- Thanks for coming on. This will be fun.
- Yeah.

45
00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:55,250
Does that zip all the way down?

46
00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:57,887
And we're back in five, four...

47
00:02:59,360 --> 00:03:03,445
<i>Get up, get up, get up, and get out</i>

48
00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:06,763
<i>Ha, ha! And we're back.
You know, every week we like to highlight...</i>

49
00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:09,890
<i>...local inventors and entrepreneurs
in our Big Idea Spotlight.</i>

50
00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:11,127
<i>That's right, Mike.</i>

51
00:03:11,280 --> 00:03:13,203
<i>And today we have
three modern-day...</i>

52
00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:18,208
<i>...Edisons who've created a new shower gadget
they hope to really clean up with.</i>

53
00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:23,647
<i>Please, welcome Nick, Kurt and Dale.</i>

54
00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:27,361
<i>- Pleasure to be here.
- Before we get to the product, can you tell us...</i>

55
00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:31,610
<i>...what is it that inspired three regular Joes
to go into business for yourselves?</i>

56
00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:34,843
<i>We were all working at pretty terrible jobs
for some awful bosses.</i>

57
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:38,766
<i>And thought if we got a chance to be
our own bosses, we'd do things differently.</i>

58
00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:40,126
<i>This might be our shot.</i>

59
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:43,403
<i>We didn't think we'd get the chance,
but Dale had an amazing idea.</i>

60
00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:44,641
<i>Don't go to Dale.</i>

61
00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:47,690
<i>And, uh, we started meeting together
to talk about the invention...</i>

62
00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:49,808
<i>...instead of complaining about our jobs.</i>

63
00:03:49,960 --> 00:03:51,291
<i>Hey, I think that's exciting.</i>

64
00:03:52,840 --> 00:03:55,650
<i>Dale, you know, I just wanna know,
where did the idea come from...</i>

65
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,640
<i>- ...for a new showerhead?
- I have three kids.</i>

66
00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:00,286
<i>So that's the heart.</i>

67
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:03,011
<i>- That's</i> a <i>blessing.
- Yeah, well, he has triplets.</i>

68
00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:06,289
<i>In all honesty, it's too many.
I'm pretty overwhelmed.</i>

69
00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:08,647
<i>Well, he's got them on his mind, clearly.</i>

70
00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:10,240
<i>Uh, let me answer the question.</i>

71
00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:13,563
<i>Dale, uh, had just gotten back
from one of those self-service car washes...</i>

72
00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:16,803
<i>- ...with the wand with the soap.
- It's got everything in one thing.</i>

73
00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:19,804
<i>He thought, "Why don't they make
one of these for your body?"</i>

74
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,691
<i>After we had a few beers,
we came up with the, uh, Shower Buddy.</i>

75
00:04:22,840 --> 00:04:25,650
<i>- The Shower Buddy?
- I'm sorry, that name's not official yet.</i>

76
00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:28,690
<i>- No, he's wrong. It is official.
- I wanted the "Shower Daddy."</i>

77
00:04:28,840 --> 00:04:32,208
<i>- "Shower Daddy" is worse on every level.
- I have to agree with Nick.</i>

78
00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:34,488
<i>Better than having
some strange dude with you.</i>

79
00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:37,883
<i>It's not some strange dude,
as I've said many times. It's your buddy.</i>

80
00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:40,840
<i>- Why would your buddy be in the shower?
- Why would your dad?</i>

81
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:43,361
<i>- Uh-oh.
- Don't scream on television.</i>

82
00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:46,683
<i>You know what? How about you fellas
show us how this gizmo works?</i>

83
00:04:46,840 --> 00:04:50,731
<i>- Right? Let's get it going. Ha, ha.
- Yes. Make it rain. Yes. Work it, work it.</i>

84
00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:52,883
<i>Oh, this is awesome.</i>

85
00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:56,249
<i>Kurt's gonna turn on the shower.
You're gonna see the water come out.</i>

86
00:04:56,440 --> 00:05:00,729
<i>After a bit, the shampoo's gonna automatically
be triggered out of the showerhead...</i>

87
00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:02,564
<i>- No water pressure.
- The blue handle.</i>

88
00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:04,927
<i>- No water pressure.
- There's a pump on the back.</i>

89
00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:08,368
<i>- I could pump it manually.
- Dale's gonna help out. Thank you, buddy.</i>

90
00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:10,045
- Pump.
- You got it?

91
00:05:10,240 --> 00:05:11,241
- I got it.
- Yeah?

92
00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:14,165
Water comes out,
the shampoo mixes with the water...

93
00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:16,209
<i>...then shortly after that, conditioner.</i>

94
00:05:16,360 --> 00:05:18,727
<i>You shower in half the time
with the Shower Buddy.</i>

95
00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:23,084
<i>The average American... I don't know if you
know this.... spends 50 hours</i> a <i>week working.</i>

96
00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:26,486
- Hand's cramping up.
- Here, let me help.

97
00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:29,246
<i>- -Commuting.
If we can save you just five minutes...</i>

98
00:05:29,400 --> 00:05:32,006
- The whole rod's too dry, right?
- Yeah, spit on it.

99
00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:36,086
- Better?
- See, yeah. If you lube it up, it's better.

100
00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:37,605
<i>Oh, no, absolutely.</i>

101
00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:41,003
<i>I'm sorry. There's a hole in the back.
I'm gonna stick my finger in it.</i>

102
00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:44,687
<i>We don't really care how you get it done.
Just get it done. Get it finished.</i>

103
00:05:44,840 --> 00:05:46,729
<i>- Whatever it takes.
- Live TV, right?</i>

104
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:48,609
<i>Live TV. What are you gonna do?</i>

105
00:05:48,760 --> 00:05:50,480
<i>- Yeah. Here we go.
- Oh, here it comes.</i>

106
00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,170
<i>Hey!</i>

107
00:05:52,320 --> 00:05:54,402
<i>- I told you.
- Works just as promised, okay?</i>

108
00:05:54,560 --> 00:05:57,609
<i>- Now, go ahead and shut it off.
- It's so cool. I want one.</i>

109
00:05:57,760 --> 00:06:01,685
<i>You can't have this one. It's the prototype.
But we're looking for partners.</i>

110
00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:04,121
<i>I'll tell you right now. I'm sold.
I wanna invest.</i>

111
00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:06,044
<i>We got one. All right, Mike.</i>

112
00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:08,282
<i>Now, how would I get in touch
with you guys?</i>

113
00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:11,728
<i>- You go straight to Nickkurtdale.
- I'm sorry, what?</i>

114
00:06:11,880 --> 00:06:13,723
<i>It's our website. Nickkurtdale. com.</i>

115
00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:16,807
<i>I'm positive I'm not hearing that right.</i>

116
00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:19,009
<i>It's our names: Nick, Kurt, Dale.</i>

117
00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:21,563
Nickkurtdale.

118
00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:24,482
<i>Y'all gotta change that name.</i>

119
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:28,487
Cannot believe
we never said it out loud before.

120
00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:30,642
It looked so good on paper.

121
00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:35,010
It was a nice dream while it lasted, but I think
it's time we all go beg for our jobs back.

122
00:06:35,200 --> 00:06:38,488
Maybe just accept the fact
that we'll always be cogs in the machine.

123
00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:41,041
Wait. Cocks in the machine. What is that?

124
00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:42,565
"Cogs." Guh.

125
00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:45,451
You know what? You're right.
We're not boss material.

126
00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:47,170
We're worker bees. We're grunts.

127
00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:51,845
Oh, boy. That song. I can't hear that now.
Just put it on vibrate.

128
00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:53,047
- Will you stop?
- Please?

129
00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:55,965
- I picked this song to inspire us.
- It's not inspiring me.

130
00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:57,690
Look at this. Unknown caller.

131
00:06:57,840 --> 00:06:59,080
- Just answer it.
- Hello?

132
00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:02,165
Yup, this is one of the Shower Buddy guys.
Mm-hm.

133
00:07:02,720 --> 00:07:05,963
Really? Yes. No, of course.
I know exactly who you are.

134
00:07:06,120 --> 00:07:07,804
Look up "Boulder Stream." Boulder Stream.

135
00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:10,611
Uh-huh. Thank you.
We're very proud of the product.

136
00:07:10,760 --> 00:07:13,889
- E-mail us the details, that'll be fine.
- Is that a real thing?

137
00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:15,644
- Yeah, my e-mail?
- Not yours.

138
00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:18,531
Yeah, it's phatballllz@hotmail.com.

139
00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:22,924
It's P-H-A-T-B-A-L-L...

140
00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:26,084
...L-L-Z...

141
00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:27,447
...@hotmail.com.

142
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:29,011
Yeah. All right. Thank you. Yeah.

143
00:07:29,160 --> 00:07:30,400
- See you tomorrow.
- Wow.

144
00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:33,086
Holy shit.
Boulder Stream loves the Shower Buddy.

145
00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:34,765
Who the fuck is Boulder Stream?

146
00:07:34,920 --> 00:07:38,288
Only one of the largest catalog retailers
in North America.

147
00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:42,802
<i>You're gonna hear me roar</i>

148
00:07:43,040 --> 00:07:44,280
Nice.

149
00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:47,484
When you're in a good mood,
it's a good song. Bad mood, bad song.

150
00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:49,051
That's art. That's good art.

151
00:07:51,360 --> 00:07:54,728
- Man, this place is legit.
- Yeah, it's nice.

152
00:07:54,880 --> 00:07:58,521
- Did you see the free cookies?
- Yeah, you clearly have. That's four of those.

153
00:07:58,680 --> 00:08:02,082
- You're gonna have chocolate on your face.
- When we meet this guy...

154
00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:05,369
...when you shake his hand,
use your other hand and touch his elbow.

155
00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:08,171
- It's a classy move.
- I don't know this move. Let me see.

156
00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:09,924
- Like that.
- Please, both sit down.

157
00:08:10,080 --> 00:08:11,889
- That's nice.
- How about that? Not bad.

158
00:08:12,040 --> 00:08:14,611
- That's really good.
- You got chocolate on your fingers.

159
00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:15,961
Now it's on my jacket.

160
00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:18,964
- Put water on it.
- I don't need water. That will set it.

161
00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:22,283
- Get the cookie away from me.
- No, it's like a fire-on-fire thing.

162
00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:23,561
No, the water will set it.

163
00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:26,246
Ha! There they are.
There are my shower buddies.

164
00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:27,930
How are you? In the flesh.

165
00:08:28,080 --> 00:08:31,402
It's just like on that morning show.
You're always fighting. I love it.

166
00:08:31,560 --> 00:08:33,005
- Yeah, it's a...
- Rex Hanson.

167
00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:35,049
- Oh, hey. Kurt Buckman.
- Good to see you.

168
00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:36,890
- Nice to see you.
- Classy handshake.

169
00:08:37,040 --> 00:08:38,610
- Nick Hendricks.
- Nick, pleasure.

170
00:08:38,920 --> 00:08:40,126
Hey, uh, Dale Arb... Uh...

171
00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:42,880
- Shoot. I just learned it.
- We can do it whichever way you want.

172
00:08:44,360 --> 00:08:46,681
- Right?
- To be clear, we're not racist.

173
00:08:46,840 --> 00:08:48,524
Well, that's good. We can use that.

174
00:08:48,680 --> 00:08:51,843
Why don't we grab the refreshments, coffee?
Grab some cookies.

175
00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:55,209
Let's head upstairs. Let's talk
about this product. Is that corduroy?

176
00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:58,728
Step inside. Dreams do come true.

177
00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:00,484
You guys want something to drink?

178
00:09:00,680 --> 00:09:01,966
- I'll take one.
- Sure.

179
00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:04,726
- No. It's very early.
- No for us. Sorry.

180
00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:08,805
I'm gonna cut right to it, gentlemen.
The Shower Buddy: a home run.

181
00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,361
Well, Mr. Hanson, we couldn't be happier...

182
00:09:11,520 --> 00:09:14,967
Mr. Hanson is my father. It's "Rex."

183
00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:18,010
Please, sit down. Get comfortable.
Take a seat.

184
00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:22,330
We want you to know that we are a company you
can be very proud to be in business with.

185
00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:26,405
- Our workers are all gonna have health care...
- I don't really give a shit about that.

186
00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:29,325
Do you see this?
This is Jimi Hendrix's actual guitar.

187
00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:33,520
Heh, yeah. The one he did the fire and fingers
thing with. You like cool shit like this?

188
00:09:33,680 --> 00:09:35,523
- We love cool shit.
- I'm into cool shit.

189
00:09:35,720 --> 00:09:38,166
- You like fucking samurais?
- Samurais? Sure.

190
00:09:38,320 --> 00:09:41,642
I knew you did. Get into business with me,
you're gonna have fucking loads of it.

191
00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:46,124
- So you are offering to carry our product...?
- Wait a minute. Check this out.

192
00:09:46,280 --> 00:09:48,487
Miss Lang, will you come in here a moment?

193
00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:49,971
Now what?

194
00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:52,891
Jesus fucking Christ.

195
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:57,651
Sweetheart, we were racking our brains.
What's a beer can made out of?

196
00:09:57,840 --> 00:09:59,251
Do you mean aluminum?

197
00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:03,726
- That'll be all, Miss Lang. Thank you.
- Okay.

198
00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:06,245
And where does she go now?

199
00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:10,007
Now, that is the kind of cool shit
you have to look forward to.

200
00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:13,243
Best part about this deal:
you're not gonna have to lift a finger.

201
00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:16,131
My company will assume
all future product development...

202
00:10:16,280 --> 00:10:18,009
...outsource manufacturing to China...

203
00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:20,731
...and you receive a handsome one-time
development fee.

204
00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:24,168
- I wanna dig in on the one-time fee because...
- You see this football?

205
00:10:24,320 --> 00:10:28,245
This is the one Peyton Manning threw and
the guy caught it in his helmet. Keep it.

206
00:10:28,760 --> 00:10:33,163
You know, Rex, the one-time fee thing, we're
not looking to give up control of the company.

207
00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:36,887
Right. We wanna handle all the manufacturing
and you guys do distribution.

208
00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:39,646
What, you manufacture? Here, in America?

209
00:10:39,800 --> 00:10:42,007
- That's the plan.
- The American-dream thing.

210
00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:45,761
Boys, I hate to break it to you,
but the American dream, it's made in China.

211
00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:48,366
Now, look, I respect your Naïveté, uh...

212
00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:51,763
...but I'm afraid that this deal
only happens one way.

213
00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:53,962
I did say "handsome fee," right?

214
00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:56,930
Can I have one minute?
Just love to talk to my partners.

215
00:10:57,080 --> 00:10:59,765
You got it. Take your time.
I'll be over here.

216
00:11:02,280 --> 00:11:03,281
- Oh, boy.
- Man.

217
00:11:03,440 --> 00:11:05,841
- What do you think?
- I didn't wanna say anything...

218
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,241
...but he means Eli Manning,
not Peyton Manning.

219
00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:12,246
- Yeah. Maybe. Maybe. Kurt.
- I think she has an amazing fucking body...

220
00:11:12,440 --> 00:11:15,489
...but that accent puts her over the top.
It's insane. That dress.

221
00:11:15,640 --> 00:11:17,722
Agreed on both points. How about the deal?

222
00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:19,962
- The deal. Gotta take it.
- We should take it.

223
00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:22,521
- Take the money and get out.
- He's got cool shit.

224
00:11:22,680 --> 00:11:25,445
- Imagine having your own cool shit.
- But look at this place.

225
00:11:25,600 --> 00:11:28,171
I mean, these guys make loads of money
selling stuff...

226
00:11:28,320 --> 00:11:30,687
...and he just called our Shower Buddy
a home run.

227
00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:34,367
- Why sell a home run for a one-time fee?
- That's a good point.

228
00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:37,330
I don't know. I could use the
money for Stacy and the girls.

229
00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:39,926
That's a good point. That's true.
I could use money.

230
00:11:40,080 --> 00:11:42,560
I get that.
But maybe it's not just about the money.

231
00:11:42,760 --> 00:11:43,921
That's a good point.

232
00:11:44,080 --> 00:11:47,050
Maybe it's about never having to work
for anybody ever again.

233
00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:49,407
- That's right.
- Right? Being our own bosses.

234
00:11:49,600 --> 00:11:51,329
- I say we bet on ourselves.
- Me too.

235
00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:52,601
- You're right.
- I'm in.

236
00:11:52,760 --> 00:11:53,921
I'm in. Let's do it.

237
00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:56,367
Okay. Rex. Ahem.

238
00:11:56,520 --> 00:11:58,329
- Uh, no deal.
- Sorry.

239
00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:00,687
- We're, uh, betting on ourselves.
- Is that right?

240
00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:04,049
Yeah. And no hard feelings.
Honestly, we really appreciate the offer.

241
00:12:04,240 --> 00:12:07,483
- Sorry.
- Yeah. I can respect that.

242
00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:10,565
Takes some serious balls to walk away
from 3 million bucks.

243
00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:13,007
Hang on. Three million dollars?
We'll take that.

244
00:12:13,160 --> 00:12:14,650
Sorry. Offer's off the table.

245
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:17,041
We'll take half. Half is fine.
Can we have half?

246
00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:19,362
Ship's sailed.
Thank you so much for coming in.

247
00:12:19,520 --> 00:12:22,569
Dale, I'm gonna need that ball back.
Good luck building something in America.

248
00:12:23,960 --> 00:12:25,564
You know...

249
00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:30,490
...I built this company from the bottom up
here in America.

250
00:12:30,680 --> 00:12:34,765
- Dad, I didn't know you were back.
- What'd I tell you about using my office?

251
00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:38,208
- I know, I just thought, you know...
- Bert Hanson.

252
00:12:38,400 --> 00:12:39,765
You're the Shower Buddy guys?

253
00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:41,490
- Yes, sir.
- Yeah. We are, sir.

254
00:12:41,640 --> 00:12:46,441
I respect you gentlemen for wanting to roll
up your sleeves and build something...

255
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:48,648
...stake your claim.

256
00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:51,406
Now, I came to this country with nothing.

257
00:12:52,040 --> 00:12:56,568
And through risk and hard work,
I made my own American dream come true.

258
00:12:58,040 --> 00:13:01,442
- Good for you.
- Well, here's what I'm gonna do.

259
00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:05,926
I'll refer you to my contact
at Pacific Shore National.

260
00:13:06,080 --> 00:13:09,084
- That's a bank.
- They won't balk at giving you a loan...

261
00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:14,644
...once they hear that Bert Hanson just has
placed an initial order of, say, um...

262
00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:18,767
...100,000 units?

263
00:13:18,920 --> 00:13:21,207
- A hundred-thousand Shower Buddies?
- Whoa. Ha!

264
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,323
You're gonna make
100,000 Shower Buddies?

265
00:13:24,680 --> 00:13:27,445
Dad, what are you talking about?
We never make this kind of deal.

266
00:13:28,640 --> 00:13:29,766
I'm sorry, sir.

267
00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:34,489
But Boulder Stream needs to be
your exclusive retailer.

268
00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:38,725
- Uh, let's think it over. Of course.
- We won't pick up the phone if anyone calls.

269
00:13:38,920 --> 00:13:41,491
- We have a deal?
- Yeah, you got a fucking deal.

270
00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:44,883
- Hey, all right. There it is.
- I got his elbow. Yeah.

271
00:13:45,040 --> 00:13:47,930
- I got some chocolate on you there.
- It doesn't matter.

272
00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:50,890
That's great. That is good news.

273
00:13:51,320 --> 00:13:55,405
So it's 20,000 square feet,
but it's a minimum five-year lease.

274
00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:58,251
Twenty thousand.
That sounds like a lot more than we need.

275
00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:00,602
But we want something
we can grow into, right?

276
00:14:00,760 --> 00:14:04,048
- And we have a really big order, Nick.
- Damn straight. Come on, Nick.

277
00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:06,050
- Nick. Nick.
- I don't know.

278
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:08,641
- You know, I say we take it. I say we take it.
- Yes.

279
00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:10,650
- Yes, we do.
- Excellent.

280
00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:47,645
You've got no work experience at all.

281
00:14:47,800 --> 00:14:48,961
Is that bad?

282
00:14:49,120 --> 00:14:50,485
Are you kidding? It's great.

283
00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:53,325
- You're enthusiastic and you're unjaded.
- And unqualified.

284
00:14:53,480 --> 00:14:55,642
- You know what? You're hired.
- Oops.

285
00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:59,646
- Really?
- That was unexpected and, uh, undeserving.

286
00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:11,847
You're hired.

287
00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:15,006
That's a yes. That's an obvious yes.

288
00:15:19,400 --> 00:15:21,721
- Well, again, uh...
- No résumé at all.

289
00:15:22,200 --> 00:15:24,487
Don't need it. Your eyes speak.
You seem honest.

290
00:15:24,640 --> 00:15:25,687
Hold on, pal.

291
00:15:25,840 --> 00:15:27,808
- Um, you're hired.
- Really?

292
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:30,042
- I mean, if you'll have us.
- Thank you.

293
00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:31,566
- Becoming faster now.
- Well...

294
00:15:31,720 --> 00:15:34,644
- Can you start on Saturday evening?
- Absolutely.

295
00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:36,450
Okay, great, I'll get ahold of you.

296
00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:39,729
- Says here you've been convicted of a felony.
- That was bullshit.

297
00:15:39,880 --> 00:15:42,963
Word up, though, I get that, man.
Like, pfft, I had a similar thing.

298
00:15:43,120 --> 00:15:46,249
They tried to peg me as a child sex
offender. It was total bullshit.

299
00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:49,244
Oh, yo, yo, yo.
I ain't down with no kid-fuckers.

300
00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:52,404
- I'm not down with kid shit either.
- Yeah, none of us are.

301
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:54,210
N-to-the-O, brother.

302
00:15:54,360 --> 00:15:56,601
We do not support that at all.

303
00:15:56,760 --> 00:16:01,641
But, you know, let's just give the guy a job.
Just... Yeah. I don't wanna upset this guy.

304
00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:03,922
Well, tell you what, Tiffany. You're hired.

305
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:06,242
- I'm hired?
- Yeah, you are.

306
00:16:06,440 --> 00:16:08,886
- There you go. There you go.
- Oh, thank you.

307
00:16:09,040 --> 00:16:11,771
We'll see you later. See you Monday.
Get out of here.

308
00:16:11,920 --> 00:16:14,366
Kurt, you gotta stop hiring
hot unqualified women.

309
00:16:14,520 --> 00:16:17,251
What's the point of being boss
if you can't stock the pond?

310
00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:20,085
You realize you can't sleep
with these women?

311
00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:22,200
- What?
- You're the boss. It's sexual harassment.

312
00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:25,284
Remember sexual harassment?
I tried to kill my boss. Ring a bell?

313
00:16:25,440 --> 00:16:27,568
I gotta fire them all now?
We just hired them.

314
00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:30,803
You can't fire them because you're not
allowed to sleep with them.

315
00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:32,041
Also sexual harassment.

316
00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:35,369
Why are we even doing this, then?

317
00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:38,442
All right, let's talk dress code.

318
00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:41,850
- Forget it.
- There is no dress code.

319
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,606
- Come on.
- You can dress however you want.

320
00:16:44,760 --> 00:16:48,242
Whatever makes you feel comfortable...
Well, there goes a shirt. All right.

321
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:49,646
- It's a choice.
- Well...

322
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:53,088
That's the wrong choice, though.
Gotta wear a shirt. That's the one...

323
00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:56,489
He's walking away from me.
He might have been a bad hire.

324
00:17:04,360 --> 00:17:06,010
Who's having fun, huh?

325
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:07,286
Hey, guys.

326
00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:09,841
Everybody seems very happy.
This was a great idea.

327
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:12,367
Yeah, I know.
This could be an issue, though.

328
00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:17,089
It is Bring Your Kids to Work Day,
not Put Your Kids to Work Day.

329
00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:19,527
They're not working.
They consider this playing.

330
00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:22,485
I tried to tell them to stop,
and they started crying.

331
00:17:22,680 --> 00:17:25,524
- They have boxed 1200 units already.
- Unethical... 1200?

332
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,523
- Yeah.
- Well, that's productive, though.

333
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:29,523
- Yeah.
- And they seem happy.

334
00:17:29,680 --> 00:17:33,480
- Let them play another ten minutes, maybe.
- I say we let them play through lunch.

335
00:17:33,640 --> 00:17:36,041
- Yeah. Legally I think I'll change the sign.
- Yeah.

336
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:41,968
Oh, boy. This is it.

337
00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:43,730
Here we go. Here we go.

338
00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:00,882
- We did it. We're at 100,000.
- We did it?

339
00:18:01,040 --> 00:18:03,088
- Yeah.
- Let me see.

340
00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:05,120
Woo-hoo-hoo!

341
00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:08,160
- This is a great idea.
- How do you think they mow this?

342
00:18:08,280 --> 00:18:11,170
- Sure we shouldn't have called ahead?
- No. He's gonna love it.

343
00:18:11,360 --> 00:18:13,681
Cake and balloons.
Don't think that's overdoing it?

344
00:18:13,840 --> 00:18:17,049
No. I think he's gonna be psyched
the order's done three days early.

345
00:18:17,240 --> 00:18:20,084
I think he's gonna be flipping out
to see us out on his course.

346
00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:22,886
I wouldn't be surprised
if he gives us a membership.

347
00:18:23,080 --> 00:18:24,286
- Are you serious?
- Yeah.

348
00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:26,647
Oh, my God. I want that.

349
00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:29,761
Yeah!

350
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:31,200
Surprise. Ha, ha.

351
00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:34,250
Sir, we finished your order
and it is ready to be shipped.

352
00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:36,245
Excellent news.

353
00:18:36,400 --> 00:18:39,529
We got you a little cake that says,
"Thanks for believing in us!"

354
00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:41,961
- And some balloons of course.
- We're the "us."

355
00:18:42,120 --> 00:18:44,600
Congratulations, boys.
What an accomplishment.

356
00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:46,291
- Thank you.
- Thanks.

357
00:18:47,080 --> 00:18:49,321
I'm afraid I'm gonna have
to cancel that order.

358
00:18:49,520 --> 00:18:50,760
What'd he say?

359
00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:53,400
- Sounded like he said "cancel the order."
- What?

360
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:56,131
- Cancel what?
- Cancel the order.

361
00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:57,920
Don't need it.

362
00:18:58,080 --> 00:19:00,447
- Wait, no. That doesn't work.
- You can't do that.

363
00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:03,410
- We went 500 grand in the hole.
- We were in business.

364
00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:07,287
- If you don't buy, we are ruined.
- It's a $500,000 order.

365
00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:11,001
- The American dream and all that.
- He's gonna putt. He's just gonna putt.

366
00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:14,131
- He makes the putt.
- Can you explain what's happening?

367
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:17,204
- And why you're doing this?
- Yeah, sure. Fair question.

368
00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:20,125
You see, boys, in one week
your bridge loan comes due...

369
00:19:20,280 --> 00:19:21,930
...and you won't be able to pay it.

370
00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:26,563
And your loan officer has assured me
no extension will be granted.

371
00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:29,724
At that moment,
your company will go into foreclosure...

372
00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:33,327
...and I will buy all of those units
at auction for pennies on the dollar.

373
00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:36,046
Cheaper than I could have gotten them
from the Chinese.

374
00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:38,282
- Oh, my fucking God.
- I can't believe this.

375
00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:41,171
Anyway, as an added bonus,
I will also own your patent...

376
00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:44,842
...and these gentlemen here will take over
manufacturing of our new product:

377
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:46,365
The Shower Pal.

378
00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:47,965
- It's a better name too.
- It is.

379
00:19:48,160 --> 00:19:49,525
- Goddamn it.
- Fucking hell.

380
00:19:49,680 --> 00:19:53,082
Oh, Dad, that is a hell of a fucking play.

381
00:19:53,240 --> 00:19:57,290
We should fit these guys for crowns
because they just got fucked royally.

382
00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:04,283
Rex. No call for this MTV showboating.
They're aware of their defeat.

383
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:07,649
In these moments,
it's more impactful to be still.

384
00:20:08,360 --> 00:20:11,728
What about that stuff about hard work
and starting a company in America?

385
00:20:11,880 --> 00:20:14,121
- The American dream and hard work.
- All bullshit?

386
00:20:14,280 --> 00:20:17,409
You honestly think
hard work creates wealth?

387
00:20:19,040 --> 00:20:21,646
The only thing that
creates wealth is wealth.

388
00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:23,404
And we have it. You don't.

389
00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:26,040
Okay. Okay. You know what?

390
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,562
- Take it easy. Take it easy.
- I got it. Hey.

391
00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:33,402
Listen, bucko. You don't wanna
make enemies out of us, okay?

392
00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:37,888
Whoa, easy. I didn't walk all up on you.

393
00:20:39,120 --> 00:20:42,363
I make new enemies every day.
It's called business.

394
00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:48,366
Thank you, gentlemen, for stopping by.
Have a lovely day.

395
00:20:48,520 --> 00:20:49,760
Rex, get the cake.

396
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:53,601
Ow.

397
00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:57,208
Rich motherfucking, overprivileged,
fucking assholes.

398
00:20:57,400 --> 00:20:59,209
What happened to decency?

399
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:00,845
- I'm gonna lose my house.
- Yeah.

400
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:03,480
Stacy's gonna divorce me.
She's gonna marry some dude.

401
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:06,610
<i>- I'll</i> have supervised visits at McDonald's.
- Fucking McDonald's.

402
00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:09,889
What were we thinking? Who bets
on themselves? Why did we do that?

403
00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:12,447
- What?
- You're the one who talked me into it.

404
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:13,886
I was on the fence.

405
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:18,290
We're fucked! Our employees are fucked.
What about them? What about Lupe?

406
00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:22,240
This is just a problem. That means
all we gotta do is come up with a solution.

407
00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:24,129
We'll put some ideas up on the board.

408
00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:27,011
That's what I'm talking about.
Here we go. Let's go.

409
00:21:27,160 --> 00:21:30,130
- No idea's a bad idea.
- No idea's a bad idea.

410
00:21:30,280 --> 00:21:31,964
- Who's gonna start us off?
- I got it.

411
00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:33,881
- Kurt.
- Kill these motherfuckers.

412
00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:36,122
- No, no.
- Murder! Yes.

413
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:38,521
- You don't need to write that down.
- Kill them.

414
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:41,251
- Let's fucking kill them! I want them dead!
- Kill them.

415
00:21:41,920 --> 00:21:45,049
- We open up their brains and shove them...
- Then we fuck the skulls!

416
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,446
- I'm getting that taste, Nick.
- They're fucking dead!

417
00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:51,922
- We're fucking doing it again!
- That's the Chicago way!

418
00:21:52,120 --> 00:21:54,521
- Chicago way! Cut them open.
I want his family dead.

419
00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:57,445
I want his house burned down,
and I'll get a baseball bat.

420
00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:01,120
- Come on, man, come on.
- Fuck their skulls!

421
00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:02,486
- Come on.
- Come on.

422
00:22:04,120 --> 00:22:05,485
We'll fucking kill them.

423
00:22:05,640 --> 00:22:08,610
If we've learned one thing about
ourselves, it's that we're not murderers.

424
00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:11,485
- How does killing them get us our money?
- What do you mean?

425
00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:14,251
You harvest their organs,
sell them on the black market.

426
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:17,529
Be fucking serious. Come on.
This is not helpful. Think seriously.

427
00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:20,251
You're right. There's other
things people have done.

428
00:22:20,440 --> 00:22:21,851
- There's plots.
- For money.

429
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:25,447
- The plot of the movie <i>Speed.</i>
- Yes, there you go. Put a bomb on a bus.

430
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:29,082
So we'll rig a bus so that when it goes
below 50 miles an hour, it blows up.

431
00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:31,886
- What the fuck is that?
- You said no idea was a bad idea.

432
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:34,850
I was wrong. That idea sucks,
the movie sucks and so do you.

433
00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:37,361
That movie introduced us to Sandy Bullock.

434
00:22:37,520 --> 00:22:40,126
Fuck you! I love Sandra Bullock!
I'm running hot.

435
00:22:40,280 --> 00:22:43,363
I'm sorry. I'm running hot.
The whole fucking thing's got me upset.

436
00:22:43,520 --> 00:22:45,488
Give me the marker,
I'll get a better idea.

437
00:22:45,640 --> 00:22:48,166
Want the marker?
Give me $500,000, that's what we need.

438
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:50,846
- Gonna hold the marker ransom?
- Call it what you want.

439
00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:54,891
I need a half a million dollars.
I don't need shit ideas and a bunch of hot air.

440
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,610
Come on.

441
00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:58,205
Dale.

442
00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:04,283
- Boom. Marker drop.
- "Kidnaping."

443
00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:07,563
- That's "kidnapping."
- With one more P it is. That's "kidnaping."

444
00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:11,611
However the fuck you spell it. You know what
I'm talking about. Kidnapping. Come on.

445
00:23:11,760 --> 00:23:16,209
Wait a second. That's a fucking great idea.
Think about it. First of all, we kidnap Rex.

446
00:23:16,360 --> 00:23:18,169
- We get money from Bert.
- Ransom money.

447
00:23:18,320 --> 00:23:19,321
We save the business.

448
00:23:19,480 --> 00:23:20,481
No one has to die.

449
00:23:20,640 --> 00:23:22,563
- Nobody gets hurt.
- He is the kid of Bert.

450
00:23:22,720 --> 00:23:24,245
Right, but he's not super young.

451
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:27,529
- So it's not super douchey and shit.
- It's not all molesty and shit.

452
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:30,729
What do you know
about executing a kidnapping?

453
00:23:30,880 --> 00:23:33,486
- What do you mean? You just...
- You get zip ties.

454
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:35,729
You don't know shit about kidnapping.

455
00:23:35,880 --> 00:23:39,282
Okay, we don't know a ton.
But I bet we know someone that does.

456
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:42,125
- Who?
- Motherfucker Jones.

457
00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:44,851
- Oh, Jesus.
- Wouldn't it be good to see him?

458
00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:49,767
We're not gonna go see Motherfucker Jones
because we're not gonna "kidnape" anyone.

459
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:52,890
Come on, this guy's a
master business prick.

460
00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:55,771
He's at the top of his game.
We need to figure out...

461
00:23:58,320 --> 00:24:00,402
Boy, look what we got.

462
00:24:01,760 --> 00:24:02,841
Is that a Sharpie?

463
00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:05,771
- Hang on. What was a Sharpie doing there?
- You put it there.

464
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:06,961
I did put it on there.

465
00:24:07,120 --> 00:24:09,964
- You're in charge of marker distribution.
- I know I'm the marker guy.

466
00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:11,726
Permanently on the board now.

467
00:24:11,880 --> 00:24:16,283
This illustrates my point, idiots.
We need to find somebody who's legitimate.

468
00:24:16,440 --> 00:24:19,922
We need to find someone
who can get us our company back.

469
00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:36,441
Hello, Nick...

470
00:24:36,880 --> 00:24:38,166
...guy who saved my life...

471
00:24:38,760 --> 00:24:40,171
...guy who fucked my wife.

472
00:24:40,320 --> 00:24:43,244
It was a blow job. It was a blow job, only.
Didn't fuck her.

473
00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:44,641
You got my e-mail?

474
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:47,804
I did. And I was very amused by it.

475
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:51,163
I know Bert Hanson. I
like the cut of his jib.

476
00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:56,167
And I admire the way he bent you three idiots
over a barrel and showed you the 50 states.

477
00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:58,846
- Ah. See? Told you it was a saying.
- Wow.

478
00:24:59,000 --> 00:25:02,288
Now, Nick, just tell me something.

479
00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:05,569
Why would you start production...

480
00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:09,486
...without at least a guarantee
of 35 percent down...

481
00:25:09,640 --> 00:25:11,642
...to cover manufacturing costs?

482
00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:15,009
I mean, why would you do that?

483
00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:17,567
- Is he telling a joke?
- Is something funny?

484
00:25:19,120 --> 00:25:22,090
Uh, we assumed that we were dealing
with somebody who was ethical...

485
00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:26,211
No, that's the wrong answer.
The right answer is because...

486
00:25:26,360 --> 00:25:29,967
...you're all fucking morons.

487
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:34,161
Boy, he shined a light on that, didn't he?
That's true. You're absolutely right.

488
00:25:34,320 --> 00:25:35,924
You thought I was such a bad boss.

489
00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:39,448
But, I don't know, I think running
your own company into the ground...

490
00:25:39,640 --> 00:25:44,043
...ruining the livelihood of your employees
is maybe a bit worse. What do you think?

491
00:25:44,200 --> 00:25:47,044
- That's fair.
- Should I be on the phone if I'm taking notes?

492
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:51,091
- I'm not getting any of what he's saying.
- It's just a lot of rhetorical questions.

493
00:25:51,240 --> 00:25:53,163
So, what do you want from me, Nick?

494
00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:57,247
With all due respect,
you know what makes a guy like that tick.

495
00:25:57,400 --> 00:26:00,688
So if you could give us some advice
on how to get our money back...

496
00:26:00,840 --> 00:26:04,765
...I will play real nice at your next
parole hearing. How does that sound?

497
00:26:06,320 --> 00:26:08,561
- You would do that for me?
- Yes, I would.

498
00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:11,845
Okay. I think I can help you.

499
00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:14,924
He's gonna help? Okay, I got a notepad.
I got a notepad.

500
00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:16,491
From a legal standpoint...

501
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:17,766
"Legal standpoint."

502
00:26:17,920 --> 00:26:19,490
...your options are...

503
00:26:19,680 --> 00:26:21,409
- "Options are..."
- Legal options.

504
00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:23,927
...jack fucking shit.

505
00:26:24,080 --> 00:26:26,321
I heard "Jack Leibowitz."
Is that an attorney?

506
00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:29,000
<i>- I'll</i> write that down.
- Can we get his contact info?

507
00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:32,564
Even if you had the money
to fight him in the courts...

508
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:36,008
...his lawyers are just gonna file motions
and continuances...

509
00:26:36,160 --> 00:26:39,801
...long after you three
pissant little fuckups...

510
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:41,962
...have blown your tiny little brains out.

511
00:26:42,160 --> 00:26:43,685
You saying nothing can be done?

512
00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:45,968
No, I said there's nothing you can do.

513
00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:49,528
There's plenty that could be done,
but you won't do it.

514
00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:52,604
- And do you wanna know why?
- No, not really.

515
00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:55,889
- Because you have no balls.
- I see.

516
00:26:56,040 --> 00:26:57,883
And your fathers had no balls.

517
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:01,010
You are all a product of generations
of ball-less men...

518
00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:04,687
...who were too weak or too frightened
to stand up and take what was theirs.

519
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:07,366
And one day, you will pass on...

520
00:27:07,560 --> 00:27:12,407
...your empty, shriveled sacs
to your own pitiful offspring.

521
00:27:12,560 --> 00:27:15,450
- I can't hear. What is he talking about?
- Our nut sacs, mostly.

522
00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:16,601
How'd that come up?

523
00:27:16,760 --> 00:27:19,730
- Why don't you pitch him the kidnapping?
- Let the kidnapping go.

524
00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:22,531
- Pitch him the kidnapping.
- Show some balls, all right?

525
00:27:22,680 --> 00:27:24,205
Wanna see balls? Kidnap someone.

526
00:27:24,360 --> 00:27:27,000
You'll end up in here. You'll see
plenty of balls on your forehead.

527
00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:29,003
- Mm.
- Why are they on my forehead?

528
00:27:29,160 --> 00:27:31,320
- Was the dick on top of my head?
- Makes no sense.

529
00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:34,250
- Oh, I'm upside down.
- You sure are. Your face is getting fucked.

530
00:27:41,360 --> 00:27:42,600
Motherfucker.

531
00:27:50,760 --> 00:27:55,846
Mm-hm. So y'all plan to use the ransom
to save your business.

532
00:27:56,000 --> 00:27:58,446
- Exactly, yeah. That's it.
- That's what we're hoping.

533
00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:01,490
Will you tell these idiots
how stupid that is, please?

534
00:28:01,840 --> 00:28:02,887
Ah. I like it.

535
00:28:03,040 --> 00:28:04,565
- Nice. See?
- I knew he'd like it.

536
00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:07,530
You're doing what you need to
to keep your business going.

537
00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:10,126
I had a dream for a long time
to get my own business.

538
00:28:10,280 --> 00:28:11,281
Yeah.

539
00:28:11,600 --> 00:28:13,967
I wanted to open my own Pinkberry.

540
00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:16,160
- Ha, ha.
- What the fuck is the chuckles about?

541
00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:17,964
Oh, I thought you were joking.

542
00:28:18,120 --> 00:28:21,886
See how many crackers line up to get
that Captain Crunch-covered freezing shit?

543
00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:24,850
- I eat it three times a week. I love Pinkberry.
- Hey, that's awesome.

544
00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:27,082
- You like Pinkberry?
- I'm lactose intolerant.

545
00:28:27,240 --> 00:28:29,288
- Right.
- You got an African-American belly?

546
00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:32,728
- Because black people suffer from lactose.
- Oh, okay, good, well...

547
00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:35,201
- We got some kind of kinship.
- Yeah, cool, man.

548
00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:37,084
- Stool soft?
- It can be.

549
00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:39,925
- Bottom tender.
- Yeah, bottom's fine.

550
00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:43,129
If somebody took my Pinkberry,
I wouldn't take that sitting down.

551
00:28:43,320 --> 00:28:46,210
- You would fight.
- I will cut a motherfucker in half.

552
00:28:46,360 --> 00:28:50,081
You wouldn't kidnap someone
because you can't successfully pull it off.

553
00:28:50,240 --> 00:28:52,288
Name me a kidnapping movie...

554
00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:55,523
...where the kidnappers weren't dead
or incarcerated at the end.

555
00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:57,205
- 9 <i>to</i> 5, asshole.
- 9 <i>to</i> 5.

556
00:28:57,360 --> 00:29:00,045
- Name me two movies, then.
- You said name one.

557
00:29:00,200 --> 00:29:03,204
- I nailed one right on you.
- 9 <i>to 5</i> was this movie...

558
00:29:03,360 --> 00:29:07,046
I know what the fuck <i>9 to 5</i> is.
It's about the white bitch with the big titties.

559
00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:09,328
- Yeah.
- She got old, the titties stayed young.

560
00:29:09,480 --> 00:29:11,642
I'm not gonna kidnap someone
based on <i>9 to</i> 5.

561
00:29:11,800 --> 00:29:14,565
- That's because you Jane Fonda.
- You're the scaredy-cat one.

562
00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:17,530
You're always the last to man up.
You're dragging your feet.

563
00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:20,251
Why are you here
if you're not gonna participate?

564
00:29:20,440 --> 00:29:23,444
First of all, if anyone,
I'm the smart one. I'm Lily Tomlin.

565
00:29:23,600 --> 00:29:27,161
- But I won't have this conversation.
- Please, I'm Lily Tomlin, if anybody is.

566
00:29:27,320 --> 00:29:29,926
Sitting in the big chair,
giving David O. Russell shit.

567
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:33,124
- Yeah, he's got the 'tude. You're Fonda, man.
- You're Jane Fonda.

568
00:29:33,280 --> 00:29:37,330
- That makes you Dolly Parton.
- Great. Woman's got her own theme park.

569
00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:39,881
- She's a national treasure.
- Two national treasures.

570
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:42,361
Can I pose a question to you colonizers?

571
00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:44,651
Happened a long time ago.

572
00:29:45,040 --> 00:29:48,089
How do you kidnap somebody
without them knowing...

573
00:29:48,400 --> 00:29:50,084
...they've been kidnapped?

574
00:29:50,400 --> 00:29:53,768
- Okay.
- You smarten up, and you don't even do it.

575
00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:56,730
- He's a black sphinx. I like it.
- He threw a riddle our way.

576
00:29:57,080 --> 00:29:59,321
- How do you...?
- Voodoo. Voodoo?

577
00:29:59,520 --> 00:30:01,443
I can give you the answers.

578
00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:04,804
- Fifty thousand.
- No.

579
00:30:04,960 --> 00:30:06,405
- We can't.
- Six hundred?

580
00:30:06,840 --> 00:30:08,683
You should not run a Pinkberry. Sorry.

581
00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:11,366
- The weirdest negotiating style.
- We don't have money.

582
00:30:11,520 --> 00:30:15,161
You know, we're here because
we have zero dollars. We're broke.

583
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:16,720
Fuck it. Give me the watch.

584
00:30:16,880 --> 00:30:18,211
- Nope.
- Give him your watch.

585
00:30:18,360 --> 00:30:22,206
- I'm not giving him this. This is a Tag Heuer.
- This is a wrist without a watch.

586
00:30:22,360 --> 00:30:25,204
Come on. It's just material things.
Can't take it with you.

587
00:30:25,360 --> 00:30:27,840
You can borrow it
while you tell us a shitty plan.

588
00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:30,361
All right.

589
00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:35,526
Slip him a mickey.

590
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:37,682
Give me the watch back.

591
00:30:37,840 --> 00:30:39,365
You sneak into his crib at night.

592
00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:42,609
Find out whatever his beverage of choice is
before he goes to bed.

593
00:30:42,760 --> 00:30:46,287
You slip the mickey in the beverage.
Knock him out nice and easy.

594
00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:49,523
And you keep that bitch sedated
until Daddy pays up.

595
00:30:49,680 --> 00:30:52,331
It's not a crazy idea,
but it's not worth a Swiss watch.

596
00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:55,324
- That could work.
- Hmm. That's great. That makes total sense.

597
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:58,802
- He doesn't see our faces.
- We're ghosts. We don't even exist.

598
00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:02,800
- When you say "mickey... "?
- A date-rape drug. Where do you get those?

599
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:05,207
- Where do I get them?
- Uh... Yeah.

600
00:31:05,360 --> 00:31:08,523
Because of the hue of my skin
I know where to get date-rape drugs?

601
00:31:08,720 --> 00:31:11,769
- You brought up the date-raping.
- You got N word in your eyes.

602
00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:14,287
- Why are your eyes saying the N word?
- Klan eyes.

603
00:31:14,440 --> 00:31:16,761
- You've got Klan eyes.
- You ever take a eye test?

604
00:31:16,920 --> 00:31:18,604
- Yes.
- All you pick out is the K.

605
00:31:18,760 --> 00:31:20,603
- I see every letter.
- He does have Klan eyes.

606
00:31:20,760 --> 00:31:22,922
You can see them poking out
behind that sheet.

607
00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:26,926
- It's just ridic... I can't... It's so upsetting.
- Let me ask you a question.

608
00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:30,687
When you got raped by Julia, what did she
use to knock you out? Laughing gas?

609
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:32,001
- Oh, right.
- That'll work.

610
00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:34,487
- That's interesting.
- You have keys to the office?

611
00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:36,130
- No, but I know the code.
- Yes.

612
00:31:36,720 --> 00:31:38,370
Okay. You did it again.

613
00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:41,285
- For the record, I am not racist.
- You're the best. Thanks.

614
00:31:41,440 --> 00:31:43,204
- Let's go. See you.
- Good to see you.

615
00:31:43,360 --> 00:31:46,284
Surprisingly helpful.
Any way I can get the watch back?

616
00:31:46,440 --> 00:31:48,761
Fuck out of here, Jane Fonda.

617
00:31:53,720 --> 00:31:56,690
That's a tough one.
And you can't fuck all three, right?

618
00:31:56,840 --> 00:31:58,683
- You cannot.
- Not the game. Okay.

619
00:31:58,840 --> 00:32:02,686
Well, then I would marry Peter,
kill Bobby, and fuck Greg.

620
00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:04,251
- That's what I'd do too.
- Yeah?

621
00:32:04,440 --> 00:32:07,171
- I think that's the only way to play it.
- It makes sense.

622
00:32:07,360 --> 00:32:08,930
- How'd you do?
- I did great.

623
00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:12,209
I got extra supplies.
I think we gotta be more careful this time.

624
00:32:12,360 --> 00:32:15,409
- Absolutely. So smart.
- I got a magazine to cut up the ransom note.

625
00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:17,289
- Can't be writing it by hand.
- Smart.

626
00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:18,521
<i>Bride Again Magazine?</i>

627
00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:22,730
To throw the cops off if they start snooping
to figure out where the letters came from.

628
00:32:22,880 --> 00:32:25,008
- Dora the Explorer walkie-talkies?
- Awesome.

629
00:32:25,160 --> 00:32:29,131
- It's not a spy store. It's a convenience store.
- Didn't wanna just use our phones?

630
00:32:29,280 --> 00:32:33,001
Let's use our phones. They make a record
of everything that we say and do.

631
00:32:33,160 --> 00:32:35,162
- Do you watch the news?
- My apologies.

632
00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:37,448
Hey, Obama. I'm breaking
into my old office.

633
00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:40,246
It's just the three of us doing this,
not us and the NSA.

634
00:32:40,400 --> 00:32:42,050
- I'm trying to help us out.
- Heh.

635
00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:44,202
- Did you get scissors?
- I got some scissors.

636
00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:47,967
- I don't see any latex gloves in here.
- They're, like, super expensive.

637
00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:49,485
- How much?
- Nine bucks a pair.

638
00:32:49,640 --> 00:32:50,880
- That's ridiculous.
- Right?

639
00:32:51,040 --> 00:32:55,090
- It's the only thing you went in there to buy.
- She's got a ton of gloves in her office.

640
00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:56,327
We'll just use those.

641
00:32:56,480 --> 00:32:59,245
You need them to get inside,
so we don't leave fingerprints.

642
00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:01,721
That's right. You dummy.
Don't you know that?

643
00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:04,645
Know what we can do?
We can use my golf gloves in my bag.

644
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:06,370
He's got gloves in his golf bag.

645
00:33:06,520 --> 00:33:09,126
Don't poke holes in everything.
I'm trying to help out.

646
00:33:09,280 --> 00:33:11,360
- Guys, the team's back together.
- Ha, ha! Whoo!

647
00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:12,566
I call lookout.

648
00:33:12,760 --> 00:33:15,161
And I will let you know if I see Swiper.

649
00:33:19,840 --> 00:33:21,842
Nice. Let's go.

650
00:33:26,080 --> 00:33:27,923
How <i>we</i> doing <i>in</i> there, guys?

651
00:33:28,080 --> 00:33:29,445
I got it. I got it. I got it.

652
00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:31,602
All good. How are things out there, Nick?

653
00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:35,446
Things are good. Hey, can you not say
my name over the radio, please?

654
00:33:35,960 --> 00:33:38,964
- Why not?
- Could be somebody on the frequency.

655
00:33:39,280 --> 00:33:41,169
<i>Oh, yeah. It's</i> a <i>good point. Very smart.</i>

656
00:33:41,320 --> 00:33:43,687
<i>There you go.
That's using the old Hendricks brain.</i>

657
00:33:43,840 --> 00:33:45,604
And there's the last name.

658
00:33:45,760 --> 00:33:48,206
- We should come up with code names.
- Absolutely.

659
00:33:48,360 --> 00:33:52,570
- Nick, where you landing on code names?
- I'd love it if you'd stop saying my name.

660
00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:55,087
- Just get the gas and get out here.
- Roger that.

661
00:33:57,400 --> 00:33:59,448
The Blade has acquired the target.

662
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:02,246
- Was that "The Blade"?
Mm-hm. That's <i>my</i> code name, <i>Nick.</i>

663
00:34:02,560 --> 00:34:05,325
We don't need code names.
Everybody knows who's talking.

664
00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:08,444
<i>They're sounding pretty cool,
so let's try to land on</i> a <i>couple.</i>

665
00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:11,285
<i>I'm gonna think up one real quick
and lay it on you.</i>

666
00:34:11,760 --> 00:34:16,288
<i>Uh, I'm coming in at you with The Majestic Lion.
I'm gonna be The Majestic Lion.</i>

667
00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:17,566
<i>Now we're talking.</i>

668
00:34:17,720 --> 00:34:19,688
Not gonna call you that.

669
00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:22,810
<i>That's</i> a <i>bummer there.
I'm gonna need</i> a <i>reason as to why.</i>

670
00:34:22,960 --> 00:34:25,930
Because you're not a jungle cat,
and it's stupid as shit.

671
00:34:26,120 --> 00:34:27,406
- Fair point.
- Good catch.

672
00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:29,244
Uh, we should come up with one for him.

673
00:34:29,400 --> 00:34:32,643
- How about St. <i>Nick?</i>
- You've said my name four fucking times.

674
00:34:32,840 --> 00:34:35,286
If you could come back out to the car,
we can go home.

675
00:34:35,440 --> 00:34:37,283
<i>You know what?
What if I drop the "Lion"?</i>

676
00:34:37,440 --> 00:34:38,487
Whoa, whoa, whoa.

677
00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:41,000
- Somebody's here. Somebody's here.
<i>- Just</i> The Majestic?

678
00:34:41,120 --> 00:34:43,009
I love that. I like that.

679
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:48,326
Shut up about the code names. A bunch of
people just pulled up into the parking lot.

680
00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:51,525
Hello. Get your thumb off the butt...

681
00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:58,289
Oh, my God.

682
00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:04,451
Real hot chick just pulled
into Julia's parking spot.

683
00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:07,408
I think Julia's headed into the building.

684
00:35:07,560 --> 00:35:10,404
If you'd get your thumb
off the fucking button and...

685
00:35:10,560 --> 00:35:12,881
Ah, fuck. Fucking idiots.

686
00:35:13,040 --> 00:35:16,681
Well, you know what? It's not my fault.
It's not my goddamn fault.

687
00:35:16,880 --> 00:35:19,645
I haven't done a thing illegal.
I can just drive out of here.

688
00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:22,286
I can just drive right home.

689
00:35:23,400 --> 00:35:25,687
No, I can't do that. I can't do that.

690
00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:28,127
They'll just fucking tell on me.

691
00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:31,966
All right, we're on our way to you.
Chickens have left the pot. My God, my God.

692
00:35:32,120 --> 00:35:33,281
- The coop, I think.
- What?

693
00:35:33,480 --> 00:35:35,562
The "my God, my God"
does sounds like a thing.

694
00:35:35,720 --> 00:35:37,404
Oh, shit.

695
00:35:48,720 --> 00:35:52,406
Why don't you set the food up over there?
And we'll circle these chairs around.

696
00:35:58,120 --> 00:35:59,690
Dale?

697
00:36:00,640 --> 00:36:02,324
Kurt.

698
00:36:08,080 --> 00:36:09,570
God, grant us...

699
00:36:09,720 --> 00:36:11,768
Oh, shit. It's a cult. It's a fucking cult.

700
00:36:11,920 --> 00:36:14,241
...about our sex addiction
that we cannot change...

701
00:36:14,440 --> 00:36:16,761
- Sex addiction.
- It's a sex addiction. Yeah.

702
00:36:16,920 --> 00:36:17,921
Neat.

703
00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:25,086
So proud of you, every one of you,
for being here today.

704
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:26,611
Shit.

705
00:36:37,200 --> 00:36:38,611
How's it going?

706
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:41,161
Hi. It's going, uh...

707
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:43,281
Whew, you know.

708
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:46,967
I'm in trouble.

709
00:36:47,800 --> 00:36:50,201
- Save it.
- Okay.

710
00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:52,520
...Something that happened to them
this week.

711
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:57,044
Found this gentleman
loitering out in your hall.

712
00:36:57,200 --> 00:36:58,850
Oh, shit. Nick got busted.

713
00:36:59,000 --> 00:37:01,082
Says he knows he's in trouble.

714
00:37:01,440 --> 00:37:04,125
- Yeah.
- We're all in trouble.

715
00:37:04,320 --> 00:37:07,722
You don't have to be afraid.
You're safe here.

716
00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:09,166
Okay.

717
00:37:09,320 --> 00:37:11,482
Sorry I'm late. What's up, brother?

718
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:16,521
Toby, why don't you grab a chair and bring
it in so this young man can join us?

719
00:37:16,680 --> 00:37:18,648
Yeah, um...

720
00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:21,847
- Boy, uh...
- What's your name, honey?

721
00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:25,167
I am, um...

722
00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:31,204
I am Blanston.

723
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:34,291
- Hi, Blanston.
- Hi.

724
00:37:34,480 --> 00:37:35,925
For a guy not into code names...

725
00:37:36,080 --> 00:37:37,206
- Big swing.
- Bold choice.

726
00:37:37,400 --> 00:37:38,481
- And I love it.
- Yeah.

727
00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:43,168
- It's nice to have fresh blood in the group.
- Appreciate it.

728
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:45,402
- Fresh, cute blood.
- Hey.

729
00:37:45,560 --> 00:37:50,248
Easy, Julia. Blanston, would you like to
share with us what's led you into recovery?

730
00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:56,169
Ah. Well, okay. I do
have a very big problem.

731
00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:58,926
Just been hitting it hard.
I've been hitting it hard.

732
00:37:59,080 --> 00:38:00,366
He thinks he's in an AA meeting.

733
00:38:02,160 --> 00:38:04,640
Getting together with the guys.

734
00:38:04,840 --> 00:38:07,764
Oftentimes, ending up just face down.

735
00:38:09,320 --> 00:38:12,130
Chugging one after the other.
Sometimes double-fisted, just:

736
00:38:12,280 --> 00:38:14,965
Gah, gah, gah. You know?
You know what I'm talking about.

737
00:38:15,120 --> 00:38:18,329
So your sexual addiction,
it's homosexual in nature?

738
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:22,002
My sex addiction? My sex
addiction is, um...

739
00:38:22,160 --> 00:38:23,400
And then what did you say?

740
00:38:23,560 --> 00:38:27,963
- You like to fuck guys.
- No. My sex addiction is to ladies.

741
00:38:28,120 --> 00:38:29,840
- Oh.
- You know. I'm addicted to women.

742
00:38:29,960 --> 00:38:31,007
Boring.

743
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:33,762
- Oh, fuck, I have to piss.
- What?

744
00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:36,161
- I have to piss. I'm nervous. I'm sorry.
- Shh.

745
00:38:36,320 --> 00:38:38,641
- Go, go, just pee.
- It's gonna make too much noise.

746
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:41,531
No, no, just dip your dick into the toilet.

747
00:38:41,680 --> 00:38:44,081
- Oh, sit down and do it? Okay.
- Yeah, yeah.

748
00:38:45,400 --> 00:38:47,004
- It doesn't reach.
- What?

749
00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:49,322
It doesn't reach. Should it reach?

750
00:38:49,480 --> 00:38:52,131
I mean, I don't know if it's
about "should," but...

751
00:38:52,280 --> 00:38:54,442
- I'll put the seat up.
- Yeah, put the seat up...

752
00:38:54,640 --> 00:38:56,760
- ...and just dip your butt in the bowl.
- Oh, my God.

753
00:38:58,280 --> 00:38:59,327
There we go.

754
00:39:00,720 --> 00:39:01,767
Shh! Shh! Shh!

755
00:39:01,920 --> 00:39:03,490
- Oh, shit, sorry.
- Shh! It's okay.

756
00:39:03,640 --> 00:39:05,483
- Sorry, I always flush.
- It's all right.

757
00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:07,165
Okay, I'm just gonna wash my hands.

758
00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:09,203
- No. Why are you gonna wash your hands?
- Huh?

759
00:39:09,360 --> 00:39:10,646
- Why?
- I always wash my hands.

760
00:39:10,800 --> 00:39:12,928
- You have gloves on.
- Stuff gets under there.

761
00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:16,806
- Fine, just be quiet. Okay, okay.
- Let me just wash them. I'll feel better.

762
00:39:18,200 --> 00:39:19,247
Shh.

763
00:39:20,760 --> 00:39:22,091
Oh, my God, Dale, stop.

764
00:39:22,240 --> 00:39:25,130
There's literally no element of sneak
in anything you're doing.

765
00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:27,240
- It's gross not to.
- I gotta go now too.

766
00:39:27,280 --> 00:39:29,362
- You gotta go?
- Yeah.

767
00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:36,690
Do you golf with the other hand...?

768
00:39:36,840 --> 00:39:40,481
- Don't whistle.
- I have to. The only way to get this train going.

769
00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:45,369
Shh, Shh, Shh!

770
00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:50,280
- Listen...
- Why did you flush?

771
00:39:50,360 --> 00:39:51,361
- It just happens.
- Why?

772
00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:53,841
- It's a good habit.
- Shit.

773
00:39:57,560 --> 00:39:59,130
Shh!

774
00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:04,768
- What is...?
- Shit. She's coming. Hide.

775
00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:07,327
But there was once, though.
There was once...

776
00:40:07,480 --> 00:40:12,691
Oh, boy. If this is safe in here,
I'd love to shake this out and share it.

777
00:40:12,840 --> 00:40:14,888
Something must've happened.
Don't fall on me.

778
00:40:15,040 --> 00:40:17,850
Don't worry. I took a parkour class
at the community center.

779
00:40:18,000 --> 00:40:19,684
Oh, he got her to go back.

780
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:22,486
- Uh, I was a boy.
- How old were you?

781
00:40:22,640 --> 00:40:24,244
- I don't know. Young.
- Fourteen?

782
00:40:24,440 --> 00:40:27,444
I think we were.
Two 14-year-old boys at camp...

783
00:40:27,600 --> 00:40:30,410
...and not knowing what we're doing...

784
00:40:30,560 --> 00:40:33,370
...and just wrestling.

785
00:40:33,560 --> 00:40:36,609
Ooh. Wrestling camp. Fourteen.

786
00:40:36,920 --> 00:40:38,206
Nice.

787
00:40:38,560 --> 00:40:42,360
- Is he telling the truth?
- l... I don't know. But, I mean, if he is...

788
00:40:42,520 --> 00:40:45,205
- Good for him, right?
- Absolutely. That's great.

789
00:40:45,360 --> 00:40:48,523
- Did you guys wear those tight little onesies?
- Singlets?

790
00:40:48,680 --> 00:40:51,286
- Is that what they're called?
- That's right. Singlets.

791
00:40:51,440 --> 00:40:55,809
Tight little spandex offering a clear little
outline of, say, a circumcised helmet?

792
00:40:55,960 --> 00:40:57,689
- Oh, boy.
- Am I getting warm?

793
00:40:57,840 --> 00:41:00,047
Okay, uh, maybe someone else
should share.

794
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:02,282
- No, no, no. Let's go to the unit.
- Sorry?

795
00:41:02,440 --> 00:41:06,286
What was the unit like on this little b...?
Was it veiny? Smooth?

796
00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:08,881
Little turtleneck? Anteater?

797
00:41:09,040 --> 00:41:11,168
I just... I don't know. Pretty normal.

798
00:41:11,360 --> 00:41:14,443
- Starter penis?
- Not the words I would've used, but...

799
00:41:14,600 --> 00:41:17,524
It's good to have a gay friend
in your group too, you know?

800
00:41:17,680 --> 00:41:19,409
- It makes us more colorful.
- Yeah.

801
00:41:19,720 --> 00:41:23,611
Now, did this penis ever, at any point,
find its way into your mouth?

802
00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:25,125
- Jesus.
- Julia, no.

803
00:41:25,280 --> 00:41:27,931
- You're not gonna pull this stunt again.
- What stunt?

804
00:41:28,080 --> 00:41:31,163
Stopping a meeting early
so she can try to flip another gay.

805
00:41:31,320 --> 00:41:33,641
- Really?
- She always wants what she can't have.

806
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:35,842
Listen, relax, okay? He's not even gay.

807
00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:39,004
He had one cock at 14 and it hasn't
made its way to his mouth yet.

808
00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:42,323
- Well, if you'd let me finish...
- So you did eat that cock.

809
00:41:42,480 --> 00:41:44,721
- You're asking if I sucked it?
- I know you sucked it.

810
00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:46,325
I just wanna hear you say it.

811
00:41:46,520 --> 00:41:49,000
- Blanston, you don't have to say it.
- Shut your mouth.

812
00:41:49,160 --> 00:41:51,731
- Shut up and let him share. You ate it?
- Please say yes.

813
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:53,530
You wanna know if I ate that dick?

814
00:41:53,680 --> 00:41:56,524
Did you suck that cock like a Bomb Pop
down to the blue?

815
00:41:56,680 --> 00:41:58,523
- You want the answer?
- Give it to me.

816
00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:01,604
I ate that dick, balls,
and licked that kid's sweaty asshole.

817
00:42:01,760 --> 00:42:04,491
Damn right you did
because you are awesomely gay.

818
00:42:04,640 --> 00:42:07,689
I'm super gay. Never been straight.
Know what else I've never been?

819
00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:09,524
- Inside a woman.
- Meeting adjourned.

820
00:42:09,680 --> 00:42:11,205
- Everybody out.
- Son of a bitch.

821
00:42:11,360 --> 00:42:13,886
Come on. Hurry it up. Hurry it up. Come on.

822
00:42:14,040 --> 00:42:18,011
- See you later. Bye-bye. That's it.
- Okay, Julia, you are letting the addiction win.

823
00:42:18,160 --> 00:42:21,084
Oh, fuck you, Roz. No one likes you anyway.

824
00:42:21,240 --> 00:42:22,321
Okay.

825
00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:25,882
- Mm. Let's get you prepped for a fill-n-drill.
- Let's do it.

826
00:42:26,040 --> 00:42:28,960
- Ever done it in a dentist's chair?
- I always wanted to nail my dentist.

827
00:42:29,040 --> 00:42:31,884
- He's a man.
<i>- I'll</i> make you forget all about him.

828
00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:36,045
Why don't you go get the chair ready?
I'm gonna visit the men's room real quick.

829
00:42:36,240 --> 00:42:37,571
Oh, you can do that on me.

830
00:42:37,720 --> 00:42:40,690
Oh. Uh, well, it's a...

831
00:42:41,680 --> 00:42:42,727
And...?

832
00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:46,851
Hmm. Well, uh, first time on the slopes,
so I'm gonna stay off the black diamond.

833
00:42:47,480 --> 00:42:48,891
Either way.

834
00:42:50,600 --> 00:42:54,286
- You guys are so noisy. Let's go.
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

835
00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:56,568
Congrats. I'm so proud of you
for coming out.

836
00:42:56,760 --> 00:42:59,127
- I'm not gay. I'll be right out, okay?
- Come on.

837
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:03,251
I think it'll be a little suspicious if I disappear.
Gonna complete the diversion.

838
00:43:03,400 --> 00:43:05,050
- We gotta go.
- Thought you were gay.

839
00:43:05,200 --> 00:43:07,328
I'm not gay. Go on, go on.
I'll be right out.

840
00:43:07,720 --> 00:43:09,927
Oh. I get it. You're bi.

841
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:11,491
I'm not bi.

842
00:43:11,640 --> 00:43:12,880
Not bi?

843
00:43:13,560 --> 00:43:16,882
- Do you have, uh, an S? I need an S.
- S, yes.

844
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:19,760
- How's that?
- Uh, do you have a scarier S than that?

845
00:43:19,920 --> 00:43:23,447
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, here.
This is from an article about bridezillas.

846
00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:26,968
Yeah, that'll do it.
Okay, can I read you what I got right now?

847
00:43:27,160 --> 00:43:29,242
- Yeah. Yeah, sure.
- Okay.

848
00:43:29,400 --> 00:43:31,243
"Give us the $500,000..

849
00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:32,925
...or the little boy dies.

850
00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:37,642
You have 24 hours."

851
00:43:38,000 --> 00:43:40,765
I wish you were there to read it.
Sounds scary in that voice.

852
00:43:40,920 --> 00:43:42,490
That's why I wanted scary letters.

853
00:43:42,680 --> 00:43:45,251
Hopefully he's hearing a voice
like that when he reads.

854
00:43:45,400 --> 00:43:49,610
- But why "little boy"? Makes him sound 6.
- Don't wanna be like, "Or the grown man dies."

855
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:52,127
- You're right. No, absolutely.
- It's not even...

856
00:43:52,280 --> 00:43:55,489
- All right, glue stick, and I'm gonna lock this in.
- Oh, great, yeah.

857
00:43:55,640 --> 00:43:58,405
- First draft, final draft, right?
- How about that? Nice job.

858
00:43:58,560 --> 00:43:59,971
God, I tell you what.

859
00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:04,449
I hope this doesn't sound cocky.
I think we're really good at this.

860
00:44:04,600 --> 00:44:05,840
We're extremely good at it.

861
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:09,766
I didn't wanna say anything,
but way better than murder.

862
00:44:10,120 --> 00:44:11,121
- A lot better than murder.
- We found our groove.

863
00:44:11,280 --> 00:44:12,640
- This is fun.
- It is kind of fun.

864
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:16,280
- Nobody gets hurt.
- I always wanted to make a ransom note.

865
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,289
- All here. Let's go.
- Ah!

866
00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:21,603
Son of a bitch. I knew I should've been
gluing them as I went along.

867
00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:22,961
- Ah.
- Oy, oy, oy.

868
00:44:23,120 --> 00:44:25,930
Hey. Hey. Talk to me. How was it?

869
00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:28,367
It was like something
I've just never encountered.

870
00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:29,607
What, uh, a woman?

871
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:34,203
I mean, she's so free.
She's so eloquent with her body.

872
00:44:34,360 --> 00:44:37,011
I mean, all of that sexual energy...

873
00:44:37,160 --> 00:44:40,926
...it flows from this place
of deep tenderness, you know?

874
00:44:41,080 --> 00:44:44,971
- It's called her vagina, Nick.
- Please don't talk like that. Come on, let's go.

875
00:44:45,160 --> 00:44:46,685
Listen. He's being so protective.

876
00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:50,765
You're talking like you fell in love with her.
What, are you in love with her, Nick?

877
00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:53,047
No, Dale.

878
00:44:53,200 --> 00:44:56,488
- That was a real long pause right there.
- That was a moment of silence.

879
00:44:56,640 --> 00:44:58,400
I'm not in love with her.
That's ridiculous.

880
00:44:58,520 --> 00:45:01,842
She gave me a very rich
and positive experience.

881
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:04,162
Oh, yeah? Better than wrestling camp?

882
00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:15,961
Oh, boy. Nice house.

883
00:45:16,120 --> 00:45:18,487
Well, he's doing well.

884
00:45:18,640 --> 00:45:19,766
Good for him.

885
00:45:19,920 --> 00:45:22,526
- All right, let's discuss our options.
- Breathe, and go.

886
00:45:22,680 --> 00:45:26,571
Hey, whoa. Guys, you can't just park
right in front of the guy's house.

887
00:45:26,720 --> 00:45:29,166
You wanna carry an unconscious dude
down the street?

888
00:45:29,320 --> 00:45:31,163
He's gonna be way too heavy.
Let's move.

889
00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:32,890
That's a good point. Good point.

890
00:45:34,120 --> 00:45:36,964
Wait, whoa. You can't just walk up
to the guy's front door.

891
00:45:37,120 --> 00:45:40,124
- Will you calm down? We have a plan.
- We have a plan. Just relax.

892
00:45:40,280 --> 00:45:44,001
Oh, do you? That's great.
That makes me feel a lot better.

893
00:45:44,520 --> 00:45:46,363
- Okay, you ready?
- Yeah, I'm ready.

894
00:45:46,520 --> 00:45:48,284
Watch this. Go.

895
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:50,126
- Ah, fuck.
- Fuck.

896
00:45:50,280 --> 00:45:51,850
- It's a bust.
- It's locked.

897
00:45:53,080 --> 00:45:57,210
- The plan did not account for a locked door?
- Fifty-fifty chance it's gonna be open.

898
00:45:58,040 --> 00:46:00,441
- How do you figure that?
- Either locked or unlocked.

899
00:46:00,600 --> 00:46:03,683
- Fifty-fifty, yeah.
- It's basic math. What's up with you tonight?

900
00:46:03,840 --> 00:46:05,524
- Give me your credit card.
- Good.

901
00:46:05,680 --> 00:46:07,682
- Plan B's got a credit card in it?
- Come on.

902
00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:09,490
- Your plan sucks.
- Your math sucks.

903
00:46:09,640 --> 00:46:10,721
That's what's going on.

904
00:46:10,880 --> 00:46:12,882
- Wait. What if he's in there?
- Oh, yeah.

905
00:46:13,080 --> 00:46:15,560
- How do we make sure?
- Why don't you ring the doorbell?

906
00:46:15,720 --> 00:46:17,370
- I love it. Smart.
- Don't. Kurt.

907
00:46:17,520 --> 00:46:18,567
Oh, shit. Are you kidding?

908
00:46:21,240 --> 00:46:23,680
- It's dark. Don't think anybody's here.
- Don't hit it again.

909
00:46:25,920 --> 00:46:27,524
- You hear that?
- I know that song.

910
00:46:27,720 --> 00:46:29,600
- What is that?
- It's a song, right? Is it:

911
00:46:29,720 --> 00:46:31,324
<i>No matter what you do</i>

912
00:46:31,480 --> 00:46:32,686
No, no.

913
00:46:32,840 --> 00:46:34,046
<i>I will always be with you</i>

914
00:46:34,200 --> 00:46:35,565
- Who sings that?
- Badfinger.

915
00:46:35,720 --> 00:46:37,245
<i>Doesn't matter what you do, girl</i>

916
00:46:37,400 --> 00:46:38,526
Quiet.

917
00:46:38,680 --> 00:46:40,842
<i>Ooh, girl, with you</i>

918
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:42,161
You nailed it.

919
00:46:42,360 --> 00:46:43,566
<i>Knock down the old gray wall</i>

920
00:46:43,720 --> 00:46:45,006
Shut the fuck up.

921
00:46:45,160 --> 00:46:47,120
- Hey, you're yelling.
- Shh! Shh! You're yelling.

922
00:46:47,280 --> 00:46:48,725
Do me a favor. Hurry up.

923
00:46:48,880 --> 00:46:52,407
Fail to open up the front door
so we can get the fuck out of here.

924
00:46:53,600 --> 00:46:54,601
- Ah, fuck.
- Ooh.

925
00:46:54,760 --> 00:46:57,206
- What's "fuck"? What happened?
- We got a problem.

926
00:46:57,360 --> 00:46:59,442
- Yeah, see? Right there?
- Goddamn it.

927
00:46:59,600 --> 00:47:01,967
- There it is. Staring back at us.
- Okay, what now?

928
00:47:02,120 --> 00:47:04,566
I guess we follow your idea
and we get out of here.

929
00:47:04,720 --> 00:47:07,291
- Yeah, we gotta go.
- No. Hey. My credit card's in there.

930
00:47:07,440 --> 00:47:10,728
- Call them and cancel.
- They'll send you a new one overnight.

931
00:47:10,880 --> 00:47:14,123
When they find the card, they'll know
we were here. It's pretty simple.

932
00:47:14,440 --> 00:47:16,442
- Oh, shit.
- They're gonna know you were here.

933
00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:18,968
Go, go. Car. Car.

934
00:47:28,680 --> 00:47:31,809
What do you got going there?
- Finger-flage.

935
00:47:33,040 --> 00:47:34,610
Is that his wife?

936
00:47:34,760 --> 00:47:37,286
No, that's a '93 Civic
and she's carrying dry cleaning.

937
00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:38,601
I'm gonna go with a maid.

938
00:47:38,760 --> 00:47:41,161
He married his maid?

939
00:47:48,760 --> 00:47:51,491
Mr. Rex, are you home?

940
00:47:52,120 --> 00:47:54,282
It me, Kim Song.

941
00:47:54,520 --> 00:47:57,729
I pick up your dry cleaning.

942
00:48:09,520 --> 00:48:11,090
- Okay, I got it.
- Wow.

943
00:48:11,640 --> 00:48:12,971
He's got good taste.

944
00:48:13,320 --> 00:48:14,526
It's bent, goddamn it.

945
00:48:14,680 --> 00:48:17,650
- Nice, clean lines, little pops of color.
- Let's go.

946
00:48:17,800 --> 00:48:18,801
- Go?
- What?

947
00:48:18,960 --> 00:48:20,610
We just got inside. Let's stay.

948
00:48:20,760 --> 00:48:24,003
- So did she. Let's get the fuck out of here.
- Are you quitting on the plan?

949
00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:28,488
- Back in. Back in. He's here.
- Why? Who's here?

950
00:48:28,640 --> 00:48:31,405
- Mr. Rex.
- Oh, shit.

951
00:48:32,960 --> 00:48:35,486
Kim? You here?

952
00:48:39,200 --> 00:48:40,326
Kim, you grab my shirts?

953
00:48:40,520 --> 00:48:43,126
- Yes, Mr. Rex. I go hang up now.
- Great.

954
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:45,209
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Kim. Kimbo.

955
00:48:46,080 --> 00:48:48,924
- Take a look at this. Tell me what you see.
- Uh...

956
00:48:49,080 --> 00:48:51,890
Are you gonna leave this mess
in the bottom of my sink?

957
00:48:52,520 --> 00:48:53,851
The water?

958
00:48:54,000 --> 00:48:57,402
Yes, the little water droplets
all over the bottom of my sink.

959
00:48:57,560 --> 00:49:00,769
I don't know what thatched hut
you grew up in, but this is disgusting.

960
00:49:00,920 --> 00:49:02,763
But it just water.

961
00:49:02,920 --> 00:49:05,287
Okay. Okay.

962
00:49:05,440 --> 00:49:07,204
Then you just fire.

963
00:49:08,520 --> 00:49:11,171
You lose your job. Too bad for you.

964
00:49:11,320 --> 00:49:13,368
Bye-bye.

965
00:49:15,680 --> 00:49:19,127
Ha, ha! Look at you. I got you again.

966
00:49:19,640 --> 00:49:21,642
Look at that little chubby face.

967
00:49:21,800 --> 00:49:24,610
You think I was gonna fire you
on your fucking birthday?

968
00:49:24,760 --> 00:49:27,764
Are you out of your mind, Mrs. Miyagi?
Get over here.

969
00:49:28,080 --> 00:49:30,128
Come here, you. Happy birthday.

970
00:49:30,320 --> 00:49:31,606
I got you something.

971
00:49:39,320 --> 00:49:40,560
That's a good one.

972
00:49:40,720 --> 00:49:43,644
That's top of the line.
That's like the Cadillac of plungers.

973
00:49:44,280 --> 00:49:45,884
That's just for here, though, okay?

974
00:49:46,080 --> 00:49:47,570
- No taking it home.
- No.

975
00:49:47,720 --> 00:49:49,643
Yeah, what's up, man?

976
00:49:49,840 --> 00:49:54,926
Yeah, no, I'm not busy at all. I'm just
making my maid's day. It's her birthday.

977
00:49:55,600 --> 00:49:59,047
Hey, Kim, seriously, though.
Can we keep a dry sink from here on in?

978
00:49:59,200 --> 00:50:00,486
Yes, Mr. Rex.

979
00:50:01,400 --> 00:50:02,606
What's up?

980
00:50:02,760 --> 00:50:04,250
No, fuck that, man.

981
00:50:04,400 --> 00:50:06,004
Kim.

982
00:50:08,080 --> 00:50:09,411
Oh.

983
00:50:51,200 --> 00:50:54,249
Dude, I'm trying.
My dad is being a total dick about the money.

984
00:50:54,720 --> 00:50:55,767
What's she doing?

985
00:50:57,600 --> 00:50:59,967
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
- What is she doing?

986
00:51:00,160 --> 00:51:02,322
- Kurt. Kurt. Kurt.
- What? What? What?

987
00:51:02,480 --> 00:51:04,801
Oh, shit. That's my thing.
She's doing my thing.

988
00:51:04,960 --> 00:51:08,442
- I can't believe she's fucking doing that.
- She's not going in deep enough.

989
00:51:09,200 --> 00:51:11,407
- Do you think she's just cleaning?
- What a rookie.

990
00:51:11,800 --> 00:51:14,007
Okay, there she goes. Okay. All right.

991
00:51:14,880 --> 00:51:16,928
Kimchi.

992
00:51:20,000 --> 00:51:21,650
- There he is.
- Okay. Shh.

993
00:51:22,000 --> 00:51:24,128
- Oh, no. He's gonna brush his teeth.
- He is.

994
00:51:24,280 --> 00:51:26,009
- He's gonna do it.
- Here he goes.

995
00:51:26,160 --> 00:51:27,764
- Do it.
- Do it.

996
00:51:27,920 --> 00:51:30,321
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

997
00:51:31,960 --> 00:51:34,440
Yeah, get them nice and clean,
you son of a bitch.

998
00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:35,840
So satisfying.

999
00:51:36,000 --> 00:51:39,800
Wait, guys. Okay. Now what, though?
What are we doing? What do we do now?

1000
00:51:39,960 --> 00:51:42,960
We wait for him to go to bed.
Dale starts the gas. I've got the ransom note.

1001
00:51:44,320 --> 00:51:46,040
- Not now.
- He said, "Dale, start the gas."

1002
00:51:46,120 --> 00:51:47,320
I said, "Dale starts the gas."

1003
00:51:47,440 --> 00:51:50,284
Later, you idiot. Turn that off.
We can't have the gas in here.

1004
00:51:50,440 --> 00:51:51,726
Okay. I'll put this on the...

1005
00:51:51,920 --> 00:51:54,526
- Turn it off.
- I'm trying to. It's broken or something.

1006
00:51:54,680 --> 00:51:56,682
Are you kidding me? Turn it the other way.

1007
00:51:56,880 --> 00:52:00,123
We dropped it like a million times.
I think we broke it. No, see?

1008
00:52:00,280 --> 00:52:02,169
- It's not doing anything.
- Let's get out.

1009
00:52:02,320 --> 00:52:04,049
- What? He's right outside.
- Shh.

1010
00:52:04,200 --> 00:52:06,282
Shit. He's right there.
Then get the can out of here.

1011
00:52:07,680 --> 00:52:09,523
Don't start laughing.
What is funny about this?

1012
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:11,400
Look at your face. Look at his face.
Ha, ha.

1013
00:52:11,560 --> 00:52:12,800
- Oh, no.
- Dude, your face...

1014
00:52:12,960 --> 00:52:15,008
The gas. Is this the gas?

1015
00:52:15,160 --> 00:52:17,606
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

1016
00:52:17,760 --> 00:52:19,922
Hey. Listen. Keep it together.

1017
00:52:20,080 --> 00:52:21,127
Yes, it's the gas.

1018
00:52:22,600 --> 00:52:24,728
- It's pretty good.
- You keep it together.

1019
00:52:27,520 --> 00:52:29,204
I was trying to hit him.

1020
00:52:29,760 --> 00:52:32,889
- Guys.
- No, no, no.

1021
00:52:33,080 --> 00:52:35,731
Okay. I'm good. I'm good. Let's...

1022
00:52:49,600 --> 00:52:52,922
Shit. Kurt. Kurt, your phone.

1023
00:52:53,080 --> 00:52:54,491
Your phone. Answer your phone.

1024
00:52:54,640 --> 00:52:56,802
- I got it. I got it. I got it.
- Where are we?

1025
00:52:56,960 --> 00:52:59,611
- Shut it off.
- Why is your wife calling me?

1026
00:52:59,760 --> 00:53:03,685
Oh, shit. Oh, shit. She's probably freaking out.
I didn't come home last night.

1027
00:53:03,840 --> 00:53:04,887
Quiet.

1028
00:53:05,040 --> 00:53:07,327
Dude, get your fucking head
out of my crotch.

1029
00:53:13,520 --> 00:53:16,763
Will you look at this fucking view
during the daytime? You kidding me?

1030
00:53:16,960 --> 00:53:18,371
- He seems gone.
- Unbelievable.

1031
00:53:18,520 --> 00:53:20,363
- Bed's made.
- I can't believe this.

1032
00:53:20,520 --> 00:53:21,806
We should maybe just check.

1033
00:53:21,960 --> 00:53:23,166
- Hey! Rex!
- Hey.

1034
00:53:23,320 --> 00:53:25,766
Rex! Rex!

1035
00:53:25,920 --> 00:53:27,649
Dale.

1036
00:53:28,120 --> 00:53:30,487
Did you have a plan if he responded?

1037
00:53:31,360 --> 00:53:35,001
- I didn't think that far ahead.
- You get even dumber in the mornings.

1038
00:53:35,160 --> 00:53:36,650
- Why are you worried?
- Let's go.

1039
00:53:36,800 --> 00:53:39,371
- You know, fifty-fifty chance he was here.
- Yeah.

1040
00:53:39,840 --> 00:53:42,969
You know, Stacy's just gonna
completely flip out when I get home.

1041
00:53:43,120 --> 00:53:45,691
- What kind of dad doesn't come home?
- Shut that down.

1042
00:53:45,840 --> 00:53:49,640
If the worst thing that happens from this
clusterfuck is your domestic problems...

1043
00:53:49,800 --> 00:53:53,327
...we can consider ourselves lucky.
We just dodged a huge bullet back there.

1044
00:53:53,480 --> 00:53:56,006
We almost made
the worst decision of our lives.

1045
00:53:56,160 --> 00:54:00,484
That's true. Know why? If he opens that closet
and sees us, we're in prison right now.

1046
00:54:00,640 --> 00:54:05,009
That's right. So we're very, very lucky.
What the fuck is the matter with us?

1047
00:54:05,160 --> 00:54:09,085
I tell you what. If a couple tiny things
went our way, we could've pulled that off.

1048
00:54:09,240 --> 00:54:12,403
We're not criminals. We suck at crime.
We're nice, normal guys.

1049
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:15,206
- I like baseball. I wear pants.
- Yup.

1050
00:54:15,360 --> 00:54:17,886
- Back to being cogs in the machine.
- Cogs. Cogs, dude.

1051
00:54:18,040 --> 00:54:19,166
Cogs are good.

1052
00:54:19,640 --> 00:54:20,846
It's a relief, you know?

1053
00:54:21,000 --> 00:54:24,004
It's like a weight lifted off your...
What is it, shoulders?

1054
00:54:24,160 --> 00:54:27,323
- It's a fresh start where everything's...
<i>- I'll</i> call you guys later.

1055
00:54:27,720 --> 00:54:29,609
- Please don't kill me.
- Fuck!

1056
00:54:29,760 --> 00:54:31,569
- Oh, fuck.
- What the fuck is that?

1057
00:54:31,720 --> 00:54:36,089
What the fuck is that? What did we do?
We kidnap him while we're high on nitrous?

1058
00:54:36,240 --> 00:54:38,481
Then went back into the closet
and went to sleep?

1059
00:54:38,640 --> 00:54:40,404
- Why would we do that?
- Shh. Shh. What?

1060
00:54:41,880 --> 00:54:43,405
Is he crying?

1061
00:54:47,600 --> 00:54:50,729
Oh, my God. The best.

1062
00:54:51,280 --> 00:54:54,204
That was so good.

1063
00:54:54,560 --> 00:54:55,925
Help me out.

1064
00:54:58,080 --> 00:55:01,562
The look on your... Look at this.

1065
00:55:05,680 --> 00:55:09,207
I really couldn’t... Your fucking face.

1066
00:55:09,560 --> 00:55:13,326
- Oh, my God.
- Hey, man. Yeah. Whoo-whee.

1067
00:55:13,480 --> 00:55:15,084
Ah! You had us.

1068
00:55:16,400 --> 00:55:17,811
Oh! Oh!

1069
00:55:20,400 --> 00:55:21,890
- What's happening?
- I don't know.

1070
00:55:22,040 --> 00:55:24,168
- What's happening?
- Oh, boy.

1071
00:55:26,640 --> 00:55:29,769
Oh, my God, you guys. Thank you.

1072
00:55:31,200 --> 00:55:34,249
I have not laughed like
that in a long time.

1073
00:55:34,400 --> 00:55:37,006
Oh, my God. Goddamn, that was great.
Food for the soul.

1074
00:55:37,160 --> 00:55:39,208
Good, well, we were just
trying to be funny.

1075
00:55:39,360 --> 00:55:41,886
- You know, no harm, no foul, right?
- Yeah, yeah.

1076
00:55:42,040 --> 00:55:43,849
Guys, I completely underestimated you.

1077
00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:47,641
You fuckers have some low-hanging balls.
I mean it. I'm impressed.

1078
00:55:48,320 --> 00:55:50,641
I mean, I wake up,
I find you three in my closet...

1079
00:55:50,800 --> 00:55:53,485
...along with a ransom note,
a big old bottle of nitrous.

1080
00:55:53,640 --> 00:55:57,122
I'm like, "Holy shit.
These fuckers were gonna gas me."

1081
00:55:57,280 --> 00:55:59,851
I'm about to call the cops when I think,
"Hold up a sec.

1082
00:56:00,040 --> 00:56:02,008
These guys may be onto something."

1083
00:56:03,160 --> 00:56:05,162
I wanna partner up on this thing.

1084
00:56:05,320 --> 00:56:08,529
- What thing? What are you talking about?
- I'm not sure what you mean.

1085
00:56:08,680 --> 00:56:11,001
- This thing. My kidnapping.
- Oh.

1086
00:56:11,320 --> 00:56:14,164
Truth be told, Pop and I...

1087
00:56:14,520 --> 00:56:17,922
...we've hit a rough patch.
He's refusing to cover some of my expenses.

1088
00:56:18,080 --> 00:56:22,165
Long story. Anyway, your timing could not
have been better. Is this a fucking marlin?

1089
00:56:22,320 --> 00:56:25,688
Rex, this is, uh, cool and all,
but we decided, like, we're out.

1090
00:56:25,840 --> 00:56:27,649
- We're not doing crime.
- Not our thing.

1091
00:56:27,800 --> 00:56:30,770
Yeah, no, he's right.
No, the kidnapping is off, actually.

1092
00:56:30,920 --> 00:56:33,082
- Huh? No, no, no, it's on.
- No, it's off.

1093
00:56:33,280 --> 00:56:35,760
No, it's totally on.
I sent the ransom note to my dad.

1094
00:56:35,920 --> 00:56:37,285
- You what?
- You did what?

1095
00:56:37,440 --> 00:56:40,762
It's brilliant. Who came up with
that thing about me being a little boy?

1096
00:56:41,360 --> 00:56:43,124
- Beautiful.
- Thanks.

1097
00:56:43,280 --> 00:56:47,001
I was a little insulted you only asked for
$500,000 for me. Is that all I'm worth? Hmm?

1098
00:56:47,640 --> 00:56:49,961
No sweat. I tacked on another zero.

1099
00:56:50,320 --> 00:56:53,290
- Five-hundred million?
- Wow, that's a ton.

1100
00:56:53,680 --> 00:56:55,284
- Five million, guys.
- Five million.

1101
00:56:55,440 --> 00:56:56,965
- Five million.
- Five. Right.

1102
00:56:57,120 --> 00:57:01,284
Yeah, 5 million. One million dollars
for you guys, and 4 for me.

1103
00:57:01,440 --> 00:57:03,044
Why don't we make that ransom call?

1104
00:57:03,360 --> 00:57:04,930
Yeah, Rex, let's not.

1105
00:57:05,080 --> 00:57:10,211
We appreciate the offer, and thank you for
not calling the cops, but we're gonna pass.

1106
00:57:10,400 --> 00:57:11,447
- No.
- Yeah.

1107
00:57:11,600 --> 00:57:14,365
Guys. Guys, how's this anything
but great news?

1108
00:57:14,520 --> 00:57:18,650
All I'm asking you to do is finish your
own plan but for double the money.

1109
00:57:18,800 --> 00:57:21,963
Plus, it got a thousand times easier
because now I'm your inside man.

1110
00:57:22,160 --> 00:57:23,650
I can make sure Dad pays up.

1111
00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:25,484
And then when you, uh, "set me free"...

1112
00:57:25,640 --> 00:57:28,610
...I tell the cops it was three
other morons that went that way.

1113
00:57:28,760 --> 00:57:31,240
Oh. Wow.
That's not the worst idea I've ever heard.

1114
00:57:31,400 --> 00:57:33,767
- It's better than our original idea.
- A lot better.

1115
00:57:33,920 --> 00:57:35,410
Give us one second.

1116
00:57:35,560 --> 00:57:36,607
Fucking what?

1117
00:57:36,800 --> 00:57:39,326
- We can't trust this guy.
- You can trust me.

1118
00:57:39,480 --> 00:57:43,166
No, you're right. They burned us once already.
We're not gonna get burned again.

1119
00:57:43,320 --> 00:57:45,527
- Nice try.
- Thanks but no thanks.

1120
00:57:45,680 --> 00:57:48,809
- That's a Nick-Kurt-Dale no from us.
- Nick, Kurt and Dale.

1121
00:57:48,960 --> 00:57:51,930
- So, uh, thank you, but adios.
- Yeah. Heh.

1122
00:57:52,080 --> 00:57:53,650
- Okay.
- You need a ride?

1123
00:57:53,800 --> 00:57:55,928
No. I think I'll hang out here.

1124
00:57:56,080 --> 00:57:58,526
You know, escape from your clutches...

1125
00:57:58,680 --> 00:58:00,330
...and call the police.

1126
00:58:00,480 --> 00:58:02,687
Go ahead. Call them.
We never kidnapped you.

1127
00:58:02,840 --> 00:58:04,330
- Yeah, you did.
- We didn't.

1128
00:58:04,480 --> 00:58:06,289
- Yeah, you abducted me.
- We did not.

1129
00:58:06,440 --> 00:58:08,124
Yeah, you brought me back here.

1130
00:58:08,280 --> 00:58:11,204
- There was a struggle.
- Oh, shit. Come on, man.

1131
00:58:11,360 --> 00:58:13,010
Things got broken.

1132
00:58:13,600 --> 00:58:14,647
What the...?

1133
00:58:15,440 --> 00:58:17,363
And then, you assaulted me.

1134
00:58:17,520 --> 00:58:19,045
- Oh, shit.
- What?

1135
00:58:19,200 --> 00:58:20,645
This guy's fucking nuts.

1136
00:58:20,800 --> 00:58:22,564
Hey, Rex? It's off, pal.

1137
00:58:22,720 --> 00:58:26,167
Oh, and then you beat me. Mercilessly.

1138
00:58:28,000 --> 00:58:30,890
Holy shit. He's Fight Clubbing himself.
We got a Fight Clubber.

1139
00:58:31,040 --> 00:58:33,964
And then I found my way up here
and I found this phone.

1140
00:58:34,640 --> 00:58:36,529
- I picked up the receiver...
- Oh, no.

1141
00:58:36,680 --> 00:58:38,011
...and I dialed 9...

1142
00:58:38,200 --> 00:58:40,407
- Don't, don't, don't.
- Come on. Joke's over.

1143
00:58:40,560 --> 00:58:42,562
- ...1...
- Don't you hit the second 1.

1144
00:58:42,720 --> 00:58:44,080
- Don't do it. Aah!
- Don't hit it.

1145
00:58:46,680 --> 00:58:49,923
I don't know where I'm going.
I don't know where you find pay phones.

1146
00:58:50,080 --> 00:58:52,367
- There's some pay phones at the park here.
- Okay.

1147
00:58:52,520 --> 00:58:56,570
Boys, we are doing this.
The adventure begins. Who's fired up?

1148
00:58:56,920 --> 00:58:58,206
Hmm.

1149
00:58:58,760 --> 00:59:02,162
Such a negative energy.
This is killing me. Guys, come on.

1150
00:59:02,320 --> 00:59:06,166
- Can you scoot over just a smidge?
- Huh? No, I sit in the middle.

1151
00:59:06,320 --> 00:59:08,288
- That's his seat.
- It's a whole thing, Rex.

1152
00:59:08,480 --> 00:59:11,245
- I know. Just you're crowding me.
- I'm crowding this guy now?

1153
00:59:11,440 --> 00:59:13,480
He's forcing us to kidnap him,
and I'm crowding him?

1154
00:59:13,600 --> 00:59:17,650
Whoa, whoa, whoa, buddy. Simmer down.
Kidnapping was your idea, remember?

1155
00:59:17,800 --> 00:59:20,371
- But then we had the idea to not do it.
- Yeah, exactly.

1156
00:59:20,520 --> 00:59:22,249
- I sit in the middle!
- Hey, hey.

1157
00:59:22,400 --> 00:59:24,926
- Dale, just do what he says.
- Ah, for chrissake.

1158
00:59:26,360 --> 00:59:27,691
Oh, God. That is nice.

1159
00:59:28,240 --> 00:59:29,765
This is way better.

1160
00:59:32,040 --> 00:59:33,963
This is bullshit, by the way.

1161
00:59:38,880 --> 00:59:43,488
Excuse me, Dr. Harris.
Was someone in the office last night?

1162
00:59:43,680 --> 00:59:46,570
Uh, my sex-addiction group met here at 8.

1163
00:59:46,720 --> 00:59:50,645
Oh. Yes. But, doctor,
the keypad logged an earlier entrance.

1164
00:59:50,800 --> 00:59:52,131
Really?

1165
00:59:52,480 --> 00:59:54,289
Let's check our fancy new camera system.

1166
00:59:57,960 --> 01:00:00,691
That's a gay guy. It's so weird.
He didn't bone me like a gay guy.

1167
01:00:00,840 --> 01:00:03,491
He only cried, like, a little bit.

1168
01:00:03,640 --> 01:00:06,883
And he was oddly squeamish
about his own asshole, which is weird.

1169
01:00:07,080 --> 01:00:09,811
- It's so weird.
- Yeah, that's what I thought.

1170
01:00:10,080 --> 01:00:12,526
Is that Dale?

1171
01:00:12,680 --> 01:00:15,331
What's he doing with Kurt and Blanston?

1172
01:00:15,480 --> 01:00:17,289
- Should we call the police?
- No.

1173
01:00:17,720 --> 01:00:18,846
No.

1174
01:00:19,360 --> 01:00:20,850
I'll take care of them.

1175
01:00:21,920 --> 01:00:23,251
<i>Enjoy.</i>

1176
01:00:23,560 --> 01:00:26,450
It's good stuff. Learn something.

1177
01:00:33,200 --> 01:00:34,326
All right, it's ringing.

1178
01:00:34,520 --> 01:00:39,003
Remember, you guys hold all the cards.
Game faces. You are going to crush this.

1179
01:00:39,160 --> 01:00:42,084
Hold on. He knows what we sound like.
We gotta use an accent.

1180
01:00:42,520 --> 01:00:45,285
- No accents. That's ridiculous.
- That's a great idea, Kurty.

1181
01:00:45,800 --> 01:00:46,847
Boulder Stream.

1182
01:00:47,000 --> 01:00:49,241
- Who is this? The secretary?
- Accent. Yeah.

1183
01:00:49,400 --> 01:00:52,688
Hey, homey.
Let me speak to Mr. Bert Hanson.

1184
01:00:53,040 --> 01:00:56,487
No, I don't mind holding. I just barely
even called you right now already.

1185
01:00:56,640 --> 01:00:58,642
- That's incredibly racist.
- Super racist.

1186
01:00:58,840 --> 01:01:00,046
Just do a Southern accent.

1187
01:01:00,200 --> 01:01:02,521
Southern? Southern I got.
Southern. No problem.

1188
01:01:05,200 --> 01:01:06,201
Hanson.

1189
01:01:06,360 --> 01:01:08,488
Well, howdy there, partner.

1190
01:01:08,680 --> 01:01:11,650
Uh, this here's the gents
what got your young'un and all.

1191
01:01:11,800 --> 01:01:14,371
<i>And, well, we got some talking to do</i> and...

1192
01:01:14,560 --> 01:01:17,450
- Southern, not old prospector.
- I thought that was pretty good.

1193
01:01:17,600 --> 01:01:22,322
Listen, you lowlife bottom-feeder,
I don't have time for this little fuck-around.

1194
01:01:22,480 --> 01:01:25,689
<i>Either this ends right now,
or it ends with bullets in your skulls.</i>

1195
01:01:25,840 --> 01:01:29,242
Now, you hush.
You don't scare us one bit. We got your boy.

1196
01:01:29,400 --> 01:01:33,883
<i>- I bet that tears you up something fierce.
- How do</i> I <i>know you</i> really <i>have my boy?</i>

1197
01:01:35,520 --> 01:01:36,567
Dad.

1198
01:01:37,040 --> 01:01:39,930
<i>Dad, is that you? Please. They're crazy.</i>

1199
01:01:40,080 --> 01:01:42,447
They told me if you call the police,
they'd kill me.

1200
01:01:42,600 --> 01:01:45,524
Please. Please, do whatever
they say. I don't wanna die, Dad.

1201
01:01:45,720 --> 01:01:47,484
No police. Aah!

1202
01:01:47,680 --> 01:01:49,967
- God!
- Rex? Rex? Where are you?

1203
01:01:50,120 --> 01:01:52,930
Now, you listen.
Y'all gonna have to rassle up...

1204
01:01:53,080 --> 01:01:56,004
...that 5 million bucks in cash.

1205
01:01:56,160 --> 01:01:57,730
<i>We're looking at all 100s.</i>

1206
01:01:57,880 --> 01:01:58,927
- Unmarked.
- Unmarked.

1207
01:01:59,080 --> 01:02:01,924
- No tracers.
- No tracers and no dye packs neither.

1208
01:02:02,080 --> 01:02:04,606
Otherwise, we gonna take your boy...

1209
01:02:04,760 --> 01:02:08,242
...and string him up by
his pretty little neck...

1210
01:02:08,400 --> 01:02:12,849
...with the roughest,
coarsest piece of rope we got...

1211
01:02:13,040 --> 01:02:15,361
...in our rope inventory.

1212
01:02:15,520 --> 01:02:18,444
<i>You understand?
You got 24 hours before he dead.</i>

1213
01:02:19,960 --> 01:02:21,246
- Yes.
- That is how it's done.

1214
01:02:21,400 --> 01:02:22,481
Let's go. All right.

1215
01:02:22,840 --> 01:02:25,446
Guys, that was great.

1216
01:02:25,840 --> 01:02:27,126
That was so much fun.

1217
01:02:27,280 --> 01:02:28,964
- Absolutely.
- You were incredible.

1218
01:02:29,120 --> 01:02:31,771
- Thanks for getting us snacks, dude.
- You earned it.

1219
01:02:31,920 --> 01:02:33,251
So now what? What do we do?

1220
01:02:33,400 --> 01:02:34,447
- Okay.
- What's the plan?

1221
01:02:34,640 --> 01:02:36,847
- I say we go back to the office.
Mm-hm.

1222
01:02:37,000 --> 01:02:38,570
Okay? Lay low for a little while.

1223
01:02:38,720 --> 01:02:40,688
And we wait for that
money train to roll in.

1224
01:02:42,160 --> 01:02:43,730
- Choo-choo!
- Choo-choo, baby!

1225
01:02:45,520 --> 01:02:48,251
- Oh! Turn up this song. I love this one.
- We're doing this thing.

1226
01:02:48,400 --> 01:02:52,485
I hate to break up the car party, but, Rex,
you don't have a plan for the ransom drop...

1227
01:02:52,640 --> 01:02:54,520
...and that is the part
where people get caught.

1228
01:02:54,640 --> 01:02:59,123
Wow. The ransom drop is only hard
if the police are involved.

1229
01:02:59,280 --> 01:03:03,251
Yeah. But what if he does call the police?
Because that wouldn't be good.

1230
01:03:03,400 --> 01:03:07,246
He's a billionaire.
He's not gonna risk my life over $5 million.

1231
01:03:07,400 --> 01:03:10,882
After Kurt's little performance,
there's no way he's gonna call the cops.

1232
01:03:11,040 --> 01:03:13,850
My performance? What about yours?
You were so in the moment.

1233
01:03:14,000 --> 01:03:16,082
- You think so?
- You were great! And you were!

1234
01:03:16,240 --> 01:03:18,402
Get your mouths off his dick, okay?

1235
01:03:18,600 --> 01:03:21,080
- Everyone was doing pretty good.
- Whoa. Take it down a notch.

1236
01:03:22,320 --> 01:03:24,163
Wait. Shut up, shut up, shut up.
This is Stacy.

1237
01:03:24,360 --> 01:03:26,522
Oh, my God. I forgot to call her.
Uh, hi, honey.

1238
01:03:26,680 --> 01:03:29,445
- Where have you been all night?
- Here's <i>what</i> happened.

1239
01:03:29,600 --> 01:03:31,409
I fell asleep at the office, and...

1240
01:03:31,560 --> 01:03:34,609
Really? Because Find My iPhone
said you weren't at the office.

1241
01:03:34,760 --> 01:03:36,683
Heh. What, are you cheating on me, Dale?

1242
01:03:36,840 --> 01:03:38,524
- Look, you're upset and...
- Oh, shit.

1243
01:03:38,680 --> 01:03:41,524
- Oh, God. Goddamn it.
- He called the cops.

1244
01:03:41,680 --> 01:03:44,650
- Oh, we're busted.
- Busted? Oh, my God.

1245
01:03:44,840 --> 01:03:46,365
- I'm not busted.
- Drive.

1246
01:03:46,520 --> 01:03:48,807
No one is busted in
a bad sense of the word.

1247
01:03:48,960 --> 01:03:52,043
- Too late. Lupe's got us. Pull in.
- Put your head in my lap.

1248
01:03:52,200 --> 01:03:56,285
Honey, no one's head's going in my lap. It's
something guys are saying now. I can't talk.

1249
01:03:56,440 --> 01:03:58,169
- Hide, hide, hide.
- I am fucked.

1250
01:03:58,320 --> 01:04:00,482
- Let's just go in. Be calm and be cool.
- Shit.

1251
01:04:00,640 --> 01:04:02,608
- Hi.
- Gentlemen.

1252
01:04:02,760 --> 01:04:05,001
- You own this establishment?
- This place here?

1253
01:04:05,160 --> 01:04:07,845
I don't know. Do you really
own anything in this lifetime?

1254
01:04:08,000 --> 01:04:11,243
- We're currently renting.
- It's all just material. Electrons, protons.

1255
01:04:11,400 --> 01:04:12,731
- Yeah. We do.
- Technically.

1256
01:04:13,200 --> 01:04:17,728
Let me ask you, has your company done
business recently with a Mr. Bert Hanson?

1257
01:04:18,280 --> 01:04:22,524
- Barb Fanson? Doesn't ring a bell.
- Not really ringing a bell.

1258
01:04:22,680 --> 01:04:24,682
- I don't think that we have.
- Not our guy.

1259
01:04:24,880 --> 01:04:27,724
That's interesting.
The way I hear it, you're working with him.

1260
01:04:27,920 --> 01:04:30,764
And things didn't shake out
too well for you boys.

1261
01:04:30,920 --> 01:04:32,206
- Oh, Bert.
- Oh. Bert Hanson.

1262
01:04:32,360 --> 01:04:33,691
- Yeah.
- Is that what he said?

1263
01:04:33,840 --> 01:04:36,081
- Bert Hanson? Oh, yeah. We know him.
- That guy.

1264
01:04:36,240 --> 01:04:37,810
We had a business disagreement.

1265
01:04:38,120 --> 01:04:39,610
- Big whoop.
- No big deal.

1266
01:04:39,760 --> 01:04:42,843
- Water under the bridge.
- We're super friendly with the guy.

1267
01:04:43,000 --> 01:04:44,001
You're very forgiving.

1268
01:04:44,160 --> 01:04:47,448
Because almost everyone I've talked to
thinks he's an asshole.

1269
01:04:47,600 --> 01:04:49,409
- Do they think that?
- I could see that.

1270
01:04:49,560 --> 01:04:51,642
Strong word. I don't know if I'd use it.

1271
01:04:51,800 --> 01:04:55,247
We like the guy. Definitely don't think
his son deserves to be kidnapped.

1272
01:04:55,400 --> 01:04:56,970
Kidnapped?

1273
01:04:57,320 --> 01:04:59,322
Who said anything about kidnapping?

1274
01:05:01,240 --> 01:05:02,241
Uh...

1275
01:05:02,880 --> 01:05:04,200
- I wanna say you did.
- I didn't.

1276
01:05:04,920 --> 01:05:06,410
- I heard you say it.
- I didn't.

1277
01:05:06,560 --> 01:05:08,324
- I feel like you did.
- I'm sure I did.

1278
01:05:08,480 --> 01:05:11,051
You said "kidnapping."
I was like, "What a weird word."

1279
01:05:11,200 --> 01:05:14,488
- Should be more "kidnabbing."
- No, I did not. Did I say that?

1280
01:05:16,280 --> 01:05:18,169
- I think you might have, sir.
- You sure?

1281
01:05:18,600 --> 01:05:21,649
Well, I got a little lost with
all their yammering, but pretty sure.

1282
01:05:24,840 --> 01:05:26,001
All right, maybe I did.

1283
01:05:26,160 --> 01:05:28,128
- Hey.
- It's been a long week.

1284
01:05:28,520 --> 01:05:29,567
We'll be in touch.

1285
01:05:29,720 --> 01:05:33,486
Yeah. Anytime you want. Don't worry, because
the main thing is that you said it...

1286
01:05:33,640 --> 01:05:35,005
Stop talking. Stop talking.

1287
01:05:35,200 --> 01:05:37,680
You've done plenty, plenty of talking.

1288
01:05:37,840 --> 01:05:40,810
Where you going? Come back here.
Come over here. We're going this way.

1289
01:05:42,520 --> 01:05:45,524
I don't want you to thank me.
Just go home and enjoy your family.

1290
01:05:45,680 --> 01:05:48,331
Enjoy the rest of the day off, everyone.
You've earned it.

1291
01:05:49,880 --> 01:05:52,121
Ah. Ugh.

1292
01:05:52,680 --> 01:05:55,889
The police were just checking.
Making sure we're locking up at night.

1293
01:05:56,040 --> 01:05:59,169
You know, they're keeping
the neighborhood safe. They're heroes.

1294
01:05:59,320 --> 01:06:02,005
- Okay, all taken care of.
- Shh.

1295
01:06:02,160 --> 01:06:03,889
- No, everyone's gone.
- No, no, he...

1296
01:06:04,040 --> 01:06:05,280
He's spinning out.

1297
01:06:05,480 --> 01:06:09,041
I was really clear my life was in danger.

1298
01:06:10,880 --> 01:06:12,848
He called the police anyway.

1299
01:06:14,280 --> 01:06:16,282
Yeah, and since he did...

1300
01:06:16,440 --> 01:06:20,001
...it's pretty clear that we're not gonna
be able to continue with the scam...

1301
01:06:20,200 --> 01:06:22,965
Five million dollars is nothing to him.

1302
01:06:23,960 --> 01:06:26,088
But I guess it's worth more to him
than my life.

1303
01:06:26,240 --> 01:06:27,480
- Ooh.
- Aw.

1304
01:06:27,640 --> 01:06:30,530
- I'm his son, for chrissake.
- Oh, boy. We got a crier.

1305
01:06:30,680 --> 01:06:35,242
- Look how blue his eyes get when he's crying.
- I'm sorry. This is so fucking embarrassing.

1306
01:06:35,400 --> 01:06:36,731
- Oh, no. No, no, no.
- No.

1307
01:06:36,880 --> 01:06:38,848
Toilet paper here. You can blow your nose.

1308
01:06:39,000 --> 01:06:42,925
Just because your dad called the cops
doesn't mean he doesn't love you.

1309
01:06:43,080 --> 01:06:46,766
No, of course not. Oh, my gosh.
I'm sure it was just his first reaction.

1310
01:06:46,920 --> 01:06:49,685
- He's scared, confused.
- It's natural. I mean, Dale's a dad.

1311
01:06:49,840 --> 01:06:51,046
I'm a dad.

1312
01:06:51,200 --> 01:06:53,168
Can you imagine if someone stole
one of them?

1313
01:06:53,360 --> 01:06:55,328
- I can't imagine.
- You would call the cops.

1314
01:06:55,480 --> 01:06:58,211
No, I don't think I'd call the cops.
I couldn't take that risk.

1315
01:07:00,080 --> 01:07:01,241
- Different situation.
- Shit, I'm sorry.

1316
01:07:01,560 --> 01:07:02,561
Bad example.

1317
01:07:02,720 --> 01:07:04,643
Maybe some alone time would be helpful.

1318
01:07:04,800 --> 01:07:06,882
Why don't we step outside,
give him a minute?

1319
01:07:07,080 --> 01:07:09,208
We'll come back, don't do anything rash.

1320
01:07:09,360 --> 01:07:12,409
- Get the loose rope. I don't want him to...
- We can only hope.

1321
01:07:12,560 --> 01:07:14,289
Can I talk to you outside, please?

1322
01:07:14,640 --> 01:07:17,211
- Oh, boy.
- Man, I feel terrible for that guy.

1323
01:07:17,360 --> 01:07:20,204
I know. Are you kidding me?
Poor, poor guy.

1324
01:07:20,360 --> 01:07:23,523
- I mean, that is rough. Rough.
- Are you guys shitting me in there?

1325
01:07:23,720 --> 01:07:26,451
His dad sold him out for...
It was probably nothing to him.

1326
01:07:26,640 --> 01:07:28,130
- Pennies to him.
- The guy's rich.

1327
01:07:28,280 --> 01:07:31,284
That would rock me to my core.
Have a little empathy. Please?

1328
01:07:31,480 --> 01:07:35,451
Know what's going on? You're holding a
grudge right now. Yes, you do that.

1329
01:07:35,600 --> 01:07:38,171
- You get all tight. You're gonna get cancer.
- You do.

1330
01:07:38,360 --> 01:07:40,761
- I don't want that.
- Let the past be the past.

1331
01:07:40,920 --> 01:07:45,448
We're not in the fucking past. We're in
the goddamn present. And you guys...

1332
01:07:45,600 --> 01:07:49,082
What are you talking about? You're acting
like you have Stockholm Syndrome.

1333
01:07:49,240 --> 01:07:50,241
What is that?

1334
01:07:50,400 --> 01:07:51,561
- What, like jet lag?
- No.

1335
01:07:51,720 --> 01:07:53,563
- Do I look tired to you?
- You don't. No.

1336
01:07:53,720 --> 01:07:55,245
- You don't look tired.
- I'm fine.

1337
01:07:55,400 --> 01:07:57,880
Stockholm Syndrome's when
you bond with your captors.

1338
01:07:58,040 --> 01:08:00,771
Oh, okay. Well, then hold on a second.
He's the hostage.

1339
01:08:00,920 --> 01:08:03,161
So this would be reverse
Stockholm Syndrome.

1340
01:08:03,520 --> 01:08:05,921
Yeah, and we don't have that, okay?

1341
01:08:06,080 --> 01:08:09,721
He's just a really, really, really likable guy.
I like him a lot.

1342
01:08:09,880 --> 01:08:11,803
- He's really likable.
- The guy's a winner.

1343
01:08:11,960 --> 01:08:13,530
It's nice to be around a winner.

1344
01:08:13,680 --> 01:08:17,366
- Oh, boy. It feels right, Nick. Come on.
- Here's what we're gonna do.

1345
01:08:17,520 --> 01:08:20,490
We're gonna go in,
tell him cops were never part of this plan...

1346
01:08:20,640 --> 01:08:23,246
...and the shit ends now. Let's do it.

1347
01:08:24,440 --> 01:08:27,967
- Okay, but hear us out about festering.
- Like you can't have a conversation.

1348
01:08:28,160 --> 01:08:31,687
It was a wonderful idea. Didn't work out.

1349
01:08:31,840 --> 01:08:34,571
So I think the best thing to do
is just to pull the plug...

1350
01:08:34,720 --> 01:08:38,247
...and you tell the police that the guys
who got you chickened out...

1351
01:08:38,400 --> 01:08:40,129
...let you go, they're long gone.

1352
01:08:40,280 --> 01:08:44,205
- They didn't all chicken out.
- Now's not the time to back off, boys.

1353
01:08:44,360 --> 01:08:47,603
I say we chop off a toe,
mail it to him and double the ransom.

1354
01:08:47,760 --> 01:08:50,331
- Now you're talking. Chop, chop, chop.
- Yes! Wait, whose toe?

1355
01:08:50,520 --> 01:08:52,807
- Not it. Not it. Not my toe.
- No one's toe.

1356
01:08:52,960 --> 01:08:54,962
Keep your toes. Time to call it off.

1357
01:08:55,120 --> 01:08:56,804
Nick. Nick. Come on.

1358
01:08:56,960 --> 01:08:58,962
- Nick, look at me.
- Oy.

1359
01:08:59,960 --> 01:09:01,928
Look, man, if we give up now,
I'll be just fine, you know?

1360
01:09:02,080 --> 01:09:04,128
But you guys, your employees,
for God's sake.

1361
01:09:04,320 --> 01:09:06,322
- Dale's little boys.
- Girls, Kurt.

1362
01:09:06,480 --> 01:09:08,926
- Hey, thanks. Yes.
- Yeah. You're all fucked.

1363
01:09:09,160 --> 01:09:10,525
- Nick, come on.
- Come on.

1364
01:09:10,680 --> 01:09:13,570
You can't roll over and die
when your back's against the wall.

1365
01:09:13,720 --> 01:09:15,961
- Don't roll over and die.
- You gotta be careful.

1366
01:09:16,120 --> 01:09:18,009
- You have to take what's yours.
- Take it!

1367
01:09:18,160 --> 01:09:21,209
Put your name on it. Write your name on it
and say, "That's mine."

1368
01:09:21,360 --> 01:09:22,486
And take it.

1369
01:09:22,640 --> 01:09:24,404
I think I'll take it from here, okay?

1370
01:09:24,560 --> 01:09:26,688
- He's got it.
- He's got it. Listen right here.

1371
01:09:26,840 --> 01:09:29,127
- This is where you want it to come from.
- Not us.

1372
01:09:29,280 --> 01:09:31,681
- I got it!
- Sorry, Rex. Sorry.

1373
01:09:31,840 --> 01:09:33,683
- He's got it.
- Come on, man.

1374
01:09:34,520 --> 01:09:36,807
Help me help you get revenge
on my asshole dad...

1375
01:09:36,960 --> 01:09:39,850
...and get you paid a million bucks cash.
- Yes.

1376
01:09:40,000 --> 01:09:44,050
Boy, it sounds awesome,
but there's no way to get it done.

1377
01:09:44,240 --> 01:09:45,685
That's not true. How about this?

1378
01:09:45,840 --> 01:09:49,003
How about if we just put our heads together?
We brainstorm a little.

1379
01:09:49,200 --> 01:09:53,410
If we don't come up with a ransom plan
that you love, we pull the plug.

1380
01:09:53,560 --> 01:09:55,801
- Then you'd let us walk?
- You have my word.

1381
01:09:56,240 --> 01:09:59,130
But if we do come up
with something really inspired...

1382
01:09:59,280 --> 01:10:01,282
...then we're in it to win it.

1383
01:10:02,920 --> 01:10:06,527
Well, I can't stop anybody
from brainstorming.

1384
01:10:10,720 --> 01:10:12,051
You're the best.

1385
01:10:12,200 --> 01:10:14,441
- All right.
<i>- I'll</i> see you upstairs, man.

1386
01:11:04,960 --> 01:11:07,361
Is "vagina" with a G or a J?

1387
01:11:20,480 --> 01:11:21,641
All right.

1388
01:11:22,760 --> 01:11:24,683
Let's run it down from the top.

1389
01:11:24,880 --> 01:11:28,362
Okay. First we tie up Rex in one
of those abandoned warehouses off 3rd.

1390
01:11:35,480 --> 01:11:39,121
Then we call Bert on a dark phone.
It's prepaid and untraceable.

1391
01:11:42,480 --> 01:11:45,529
Go to the bench on the 4th Street Bridge
to make the drop.

1392
01:11:46,840 --> 01:11:48,569
Not long enough to trace the call.

1393
01:11:48,720 --> 01:11:50,643
Goddamn it.

1394
01:11:51,120 --> 01:11:52,849
These guys are pros.

1395
01:11:53,000 --> 01:11:55,207
I want a tracer put in that bag.

1396
01:11:56,480 --> 01:11:59,882
The police are sending everyone they've got
to watch the bridge.

1397
01:12:00,080 --> 01:12:01,491
Weapons tight. Eyes on.

1398
01:12:01,640 --> 01:12:04,211
<i>All right, tactical command, red team.</i>

1399
01:12:10,360 --> 01:12:12,010
Here we go.

1400
01:12:15,920 --> 01:12:17,445
<i>But when he gets there...</i>

1401
01:12:17,640 --> 01:12:19,840
...he finds the dark phone
that I planted ahead of time.

1402
01:12:23,560 --> 01:12:27,167
<i>Then we call him from the second dark
phone, and tell him to proceed downtown.</i>

1403
01:12:27,360 --> 01:12:28,441
Hello.

1404
01:12:29,720 --> 01:12:34,681
You'll wanna pull into the garage under
the Mandrake Hotel and park in Space 4421.

1405
01:12:34,840 --> 01:12:36,330
<i>There, you will find a red bag.</i>

1406
01:12:36,480 --> 01:12:40,769
<i>You will transfer the money into this bag, then
drive out and await the location of the drop.</i>

1407
01:12:40,920 --> 01:12:44,129
And we tell him if anyone follows him in,
his son's a fucking corpse.

1408
01:12:51,760 --> 01:12:53,808
<i>And when Bert
drives that far underground...</i>

1409
01:12:53,960 --> 01:12:56,247
<i>...the police will lose
the signal from his wire.</i>

1410
01:13:00,080 --> 01:13:03,163
<i>But when he arrives,
instead of finding a bag he finds you three.</i>

1411
01:13:03,320 --> 01:13:05,527
<i>Disguised. Armed. Dangerous.</i>

1412
01:13:05,680 --> 01:13:09,685
- Yeah, but the gun's not loaded, right?
- Of course not. Nobody gets hurt, come on.

1413
01:13:10,160 --> 01:13:12,766
I then tell him to give
me his jacket and tie.

1414
01:13:19,920 --> 01:13:22,526
So just as the cops are
starting to sweat...

1415
01:13:22,680 --> 01:13:25,729
<i>...Dad pulls out with the new red bag,
just as he was instructed.</i>

1416
01:13:25,920 --> 01:13:28,730
- Sir, we have the signal back.
- Thank God.

1417
01:13:29,600 --> 01:13:33,286
<i>Only it won't be my father driving.
It'll be our ringer.</i>

1418
01:13:34,040 --> 01:13:36,441
- We're back on him, sir.
- How do you know it's him?

1419
01:13:36,640 --> 01:13:40,361
<i>I still have the cash
and I'm heading to the drop.</i>

1420
01:13:40,560 --> 01:13:43,006
I guess it's him. Stay with him.

1421
01:13:43,240 --> 01:13:45,208
<i>So I drive to the Staples Center.</i>

1422
01:13:45,360 --> 01:13:48,523
<i>Kings have Vancouver. Great matchup.
Place will be packed.</i>

1423
01:13:51,240 --> 01:13:54,722
<i>Cops will stay with the money,
wait for the kidnappers to receive the drop.</i>

1424
01:13:54,880 --> 01:13:57,201
Hanson made the drop, stay on the money.

1425
01:14:02,520 --> 01:14:04,727
We got our man. Take him down.

1426
01:14:09,320 --> 01:14:10,446
Stay down.

1427
01:14:13,400 --> 01:14:15,562
Son of a bitch.

1428
01:14:16,160 --> 01:14:18,242
<i>By the time the cops know
they've been had...</i>

1429
01:14:21,800 --> 01:14:23,529
<i>...Kurt's a ghost.</i>

1430
01:14:24,240 --> 01:14:27,130
<i>And Nick and Dale disappear with the cash.</i>

1431
01:14:32,880 --> 01:14:37,363
<i>And, finally, I am rescued
from my hellish captivity.</i>

1432
01:14:37,520 --> 01:14:39,170
Thank you. Where's my dad?

1433
01:14:39,560 --> 01:14:40,800
Dad!

1434
01:14:42,560 --> 01:14:47,521
<i>A week later, once the smoke clears,
we'll be sitting poolside, splitting up the cash.</i>

1435
01:14:47,880 --> 01:14:51,362
It's raining. Who wants it?
There's enough to share.

1436
01:14:54,480 --> 01:14:56,562
Look what came. Who wants some tequila?

1437
01:14:56,760 --> 01:14:57,921
- It's cash.
- Thanks, babe.

1438
01:14:58,080 --> 01:14:59,127
Hey, whoa, Dale.

1439
01:14:59,520 --> 01:15:01,841
Get your goddamn kids out of the fantasy.

1440
01:15:02,000 --> 01:15:04,128
Let them enjoy the pool,
let me enjoy the money.

1441
01:15:04,280 --> 01:15:07,363
- They're not even allowed at this pool.
- I can't turn my mind off.

1442
01:15:07,560 --> 01:15:09,240
- Guys. Guys. Guys.
- Will you stop it?

1443
01:15:09,360 --> 01:15:14,002
Come on. Let's not argue, okay?
We came up with an awesome plan.

1444
01:15:14,160 --> 01:15:16,162
It is smart. It is mad creative.

1445
01:15:16,360 --> 01:15:18,806
You know, you boys continue to impress me.

1446
01:15:19,080 --> 01:15:20,844
- I'm proud of you.
- Thanks, man.

1447
01:15:21,000 --> 01:15:23,321
- You came up with most of it, though.
- I did not.

1448
01:15:23,480 --> 01:15:25,608
- You did.
- That is a lie. It was a team effort.

1449
01:15:25,760 --> 01:15:28,445
You came up with going into the garage,
losing the signal.

1450
01:15:28,600 --> 01:15:31,649
That was brilliant. Kurty came up
with the dark-phone business.

1451
01:15:31,800 --> 01:15:34,849
- That's from "Grand Theft Auto." I took it.
- Genius. Dale, uh...

1452
01:15:35,000 --> 01:15:38,846
I had the thing where you go on the zip
line to the trampoline to the skateboard.

1453
01:15:39,000 --> 01:15:42,368
- Nick shot that down, if you remember.
- Yeah. It wasn't a good idea.

1454
01:15:42,520 --> 01:15:44,090
It was a bad idea, it really was.

1455
01:15:44,240 --> 01:15:47,881
You had a lot of bad ideas though
that led to good ideas. And that is value.

1456
01:15:48,240 --> 01:15:49,685
Thanks, man.

1457
01:15:50,160 --> 01:15:53,050
All right, Nick. Look,
my word is still good.

1458
01:15:53,240 --> 01:15:56,323
You know, if you don't think it can work,
we call it off.

1459
01:15:57,000 --> 01:15:58,764
It's up to you, buddy.

1460
01:16:00,760 --> 01:16:02,569
Where do we get untraceable phones?

1461
01:16:02,720 --> 01:16:04,927
- Ha, ha!
- There we go. That's our guy.

1462
01:16:05,120 --> 01:16:07,691
- This guy.
- There we go.

1463
01:16:11,400 --> 01:16:13,402
Prepaid with bitcoins.

1464
01:16:13,560 --> 01:16:15,085
Jailbroken.

1465
01:16:15,240 --> 01:16:16,730
A hundred percent untraceable.

1466
01:16:16,920 --> 01:16:19,321
- We got it.
- Thanks. Solid. Thank you, Motherfucker.

1467
01:16:19,480 --> 01:16:20,561
Good luck out there, boys.

1468
01:16:22,960 --> 01:16:25,406
- What's that laugh about?
- I just said good luck.

1469
01:16:25,600 --> 01:16:28,604
- That was a sinister giggle.
- You said it with a sinister giggle.

1470
01:16:28,760 --> 01:16:31,730
I'm just saying that maybe you guys
might want a little advice.

1471
01:16:31,880 --> 01:16:34,724
- Boy, that was predictable. No, thanks.
- We're good.

1472
01:16:34,880 --> 01:16:38,407
- You know what, then? Get the fuck on.
- That's what I said. Get the fuck on.

1473
01:16:38,560 --> 01:16:40,130
- Wait a minute.
- I don't like this.

1474
01:16:40,320 --> 01:16:42,926
- I wanna hear what he has to say.
- Now you wanna hear?

1475
01:16:43,080 --> 01:16:46,607
- You got one on the hook.
- It'll cost 51 percent share of your company.

1476
01:16:47,360 --> 01:16:48,885
You're out of your fucking mind.

1477
01:16:49,080 --> 01:16:51,765
It's gonna cost you <i>2</i> percent share
of your company.

1478
01:16:51,960 --> 01:16:55,407
- So weird how you negotiate.
- It won't be in existence. You can have that.

1479
01:16:55,560 --> 01:16:58,723
- There's a middle ground.
- Here's the advice, young men.

1480
01:17:00,600 --> 01:17:02,409
Y'all criminals.

1481
01:17:02,960 --> 01:17:05,247
- It's never good advice.
- I can't find the advice.

1482
01:17:05,400 --> 01:17:08,643
It's not even true, actually.
We're not criminals. All right?

1483
01:17:08,800 --> 01:17:10,450
- We got clicked into this.
- Shut up.

1484
01:17:10,640 --> 01:17:13,120
See, you can't have this both ways.

1485
01:17:13,280 --> 01:17:17,126
Every time you guys come here, you're like,
"We're a bunch of happy-go-lucky guys.

1486
01:17:17,280 --> 01:17:20,443
Through no fault of our own,
we found ourselves in another pickle.

1487
01:17:20,600 --> 01:17:23,410
We can't get our fingers out of our asses."
Fuck that.

1488
01:17:23,640 --> 01:17:26,405
You're fucking criminals.
You've tried to kill your bosses.

1489
01:17:26,560 --> 01:17:31,088
One of them ended up dead. And now you
want to perpetrate a kidnapping?

1490
01:17:31,240 --> 01:17:35,643
You three are the craziest motherfucking
criminals I've ever seen in my life.

1491
01:17:36,080 --> 01:17:37,411
You wanna pull this shit off?

1492
01:17:38,720 --> 01:17:40,006
You gotta act like it.

1493
01:17:41,160 --> 01:17:42,161
Word.

1494
01:17:53,040 --> 01:17:54,610
Oh. That was embarrassing.

1495
01:17:54,760 --> 01:17:56,842
We're trying to do a super cool
slow-mo walk.

1496
01:17:57,000 --> 01:17:58,520
- Come on, man.
- Easy.

1497
01:17:58,600 --> 01:18:00,364
- It's over. Let's go.
- Where you going?

1498
01:18:00,520 --> 01:18:03,490
- Moronic idea. I am mortified.
- Come on, man. Let's do the walk.

1499
01:18:03,640 --> 01:18:05,130
You gotta stick with it.

1500
01:18:08,960 --> 01:18:11,327
What do you think?
Should I beat myself up more?

1501
01:18:11,480 --> 01:18:15,280
No, you don't need to hit yourself anymore.
I think we should just make the call.

1502
01:18:15,440 --> 01:18:18,523
Hold on. Before we kick this thing off,
can I just say something?

1503
01:18:19,000 --> 01:18:23,483
I'm not really, ugh, good at this
kind of thing, you know? Um...

1504
01:18:23,640 --> 01:18:26,689
My mom died when I was 4, and, um...

1505
01:18:27,760 --> 01:18:30,366
You know, when you're raised
by Bert Hanson...

1506
01:18:30,720 --> 01:18:32,484
...most of your friends are shitheads.

1507
01:18:33,080 --> 01:18:34,730
Um...

1508
01:18:34,880 --> 01:18:38,009
Yeah. I know I dragged you guys into this,
but I'm not sorry.

1509
01:18:39,120 --> 01:18:40,531
Because...

1510
01:18:41,360 --> 01:18:43,408
...I'm really glad I met you guys.

1511
01:18:43,560 --> 01:18:46,166
Anyway, I want you guys to have this.

1512
01:18:46,400 --> 01:18:48,562
- What is it?
- It's an actual fang from Predator.

1513
01:18:48,720 --> 01:18:50,165
- Predator the movie?
- Yep.

1514
01:18:51,480 --> 01:18:52,527
I want you to have it.

1515
01:18:52,680 --> 01:18:53,886
- For real?
- Swear to God.

1516
01:18:54,480 --> 01:18:55,561
<i>Do you</i> like <i>Predator?</i>

1517
01:18:56,600 --> 01:18:57,886
Yeah, I like Predator.

1518
01:18:58,080 --> 01:19:01,243
- Kurty?
- Yeah. Yeah, I like Predator too.

1519
01:19:01,400 --> 01:19:04,370
I mean "also," not the sequel.

1520
01:19:04,520 --> 01:19:05,965
- Nick?
- Oh, well...

1521
01:19:06,120 --> 01:19:09,408
...I didn't like Predator
when I first saw it...

1522
01:19:09,560 --> 01:19:12,404
...but it grew on me quite a bit.

1523
01:19:13,480 --> 01:19:15,244
I like Predator a great deal.

1524
01:19:17,600 --> 01:19:20,763
Are we talking about him or Predator?
I'm terrible with metaphors.

1525
01:19:20,920 --> 01:19:23,127
- Let's make the phone call.
- It was lost on me.

1526
01:19:23,280 --> 01:19:24,361
Most things are.

1527
01:19:30,000 --> 01:19:31,047
Yeah.

1528
01:19:31,240 --> 01:19:32,571
You got that cash?

1529
01:19:32,720 --> 01:19:34,449
- Yeah, I got it.
- Yeah.

1530
01:19:34,600 --> 01:19:37,206
Now, I want you to sashay up
to the 4th Street Bridge.

1531
01:19:37,360 --> 01:19:40,284
You're gonna find a bench about halfway up,
take a load off.

1532
01:19:40,440 --> 01:19:43,603
<i>And you bring the amount that we
agreed upon and you come alone.</i>

1533
01:19:43,760 --> 01:19:47,082
And if you do, you will find your son
returned home lickety-splickety.

1534
01:19:49,280 --> 01:19:52,204
Fourth Street Bridge,
he's gonna have him drop it over the side.

1535
01:19:52,360 --> 01:19:56,285
Now, I want every inch covered,
but everyone holds a safe distance.

1536
01:19:56,440 --> 01:19:58,602
Yeah, but not too safe a distance.
Understand?

1537
01:19:58,760 --> 01:20:01,286
This bag is your number fucking one
priority.

1538
01:20:01,640 --> 01:20:04,484
No, actually, your son's life
is our number one priority.

1539
01:20:04,640 --> 01:20:05,971
Yeah, you know what I mean.

1540
01:20:06,760 --> 01:20:09,809
Yeah, I think I do.

1541
01:20:21,640 --> 01:20:23,290
Does anybody have a visual?

1542
01:20:24,440 --> 01:20:26,010
Bridge is still clear, chief.

1543
01:20:26,160 --> 01:20:28,606
<i>Hanson approaching. ETA, two minutes.</i>

1544
01:20:32,120 --> 01:20:33,690
The Blade is in position.

1545
01:20:34,520 --> 01:20:36,648
Majestic, in position.

1546
01:20:37,120 --> 01:20:39,407
I am in...

1547
01:20:40,480 --> 01:20:42,642
Kill Shot is in position.

1548
01:20:42,920 --> 01:20:45,366
- Whoa, "Kill Shot"?
- Yeah, I wanna be Kill Shot.

1549
01:20:45,680 --> 01:20:48,923
- Then you are Kill Shot. I love it.
- Pretty sweet name there, Nick.

1550
01:20:49,080 --> 01:20:52,004
Ooh. We don't wanna use real names
if we're using code names, Dale.

1551
01:20:52,200 --> 01:20:55,522
<i>- Don't say my name, Kurt.
- Mine was an accident. Yours was on purpose.</i>

1552
01:20:55,680 --> 01:20:57,682
- I don't think yours was an accident.
- What?

1553
01:20:57,840 --> 01:20:59,968
Why are we on walkie-talkies
in the same room?

1554
01:21:00,160 --> 01:21:01,491
We're checking the equipment.

1555
01:21:01,640 --> 01:21:04,041
We don't need to.
He's on a TV remote control.

1556
01:21:04,200 --> 01:21:06,440
I was trying to participate.
I didn't have anything to...

1557
01:21:06,520 --> 01:21:10,206
Hey. Hold up. The Blade's got a visual.
He's here. He's here.

1558
01:21:10,360 --> 01:21:11,640
- Here we go.
- Oh, shit.

1559
01:21:11,800 --> 01:21:14,804
- All right. Kill Shot, make the call.
- I'm dialing. Here we go.

1560
01:21:14,960 --> 01:21:16,007
Oh, my God.

1561
01:21:17,840 --> 01:21:19,444
Hey, what's that? Who's calling you?

1562
01:21:20,000 --> 01:21:21,729
- I don't know. It's blocked.
- Oh, no.

1563
01:21:22,280 --> 01:21:23,691
- Hello.

1564
01:21:23,840 --> 01:21:26,207
- Who is this?
- It's me, dickless.

1565
01:21:26,400 --> 01:21:28,289
You're supposed to call the dark phone.

1566
01:21:28,480 --> 01:21:31,131
It's in your hand.
You were to tape that under the bench.

1567
01:21:31,320 --> 01:21:33,402
No, that's not... Oh, wait.

1568
01:21:46,320 --> 01:21:47,731
Oh.

1569
01:21:47,920 --> 01:21:50,082
Oh, shit. So, what phone does he have?

1570
01:21:50,240 --> 01:21:53,483
Bert has Kurt's phone
with our contact information on it.

1571
01:21:53,640 --> 01:21:56,211
And the pictures of us
from when we used to be friends?

1572
01:21:56,360 --> 01:21:58,488
Knock it off. Look, this is no big deal.

1573
01:21:58,680 --> 01:22:02,002
We'll do it tomorrow.
As long as we don't call, he'll never find it.

1574
01:22:02,160 --> 01:22:03,161
He found it.

1575
01:22:03,520 --> 01:22:04,806
- He what? How?
- We are screwed.

1576
01:22:04,960 --> 01:22:07,611
- Shit.
- Wait, wait, wait. I got an idea. I got an idea.

1577
01:22:07,760 --> 01:22:10,764
Call your phone. If he's talking,
he's not gonna look through it.

1578
01:22:10,920 --> 01:22:12,490
- What's your number?
- You don't know?

1579
01:22:12,640 --> 01:22:15,371
- I don't know my number.
- I don't know. I never call myself.

1580
01:22:15,520 --> 01:22:17,284
I know both of your numbers. 323...

1581
01:22:17,440 --> 01:22:20,011
- That's all I need. I got there. Here we go.
- Okay, yes.

1582
01:22:20,200 --> 01:22:22,407
- Here we go. Okay. All right. Ahem.
- Right, okay.

1583
01:22:25,080 --> 01:22:28,527
Call coming in. "Roar" by Katy Perry.

1584
01:22:28,920 --> 01:22:30,922
These guys are confident.

1585
01:22:31,400 --> 01:22:32,561
Yeah, hello.

1586
01:22:32,720 --> 01:22:34,484
Look like the grasshopper found himself...

1587
01:22:34,640 --> 01:22:37,246
...a blade of grass to sit upon.
- Too much.

1588
01:22:37,400 --> 01:22:40,449
- Hello.
- Let's get this over with, pretend cowboy.

1589
01:22:40,640 --> 01:22:43,211
Now, listen, I need you to proceed
to the Mandrake Hotel.

1590
01:22:43,360 --> 01:22:47,331
I need you to go underground into parking.
I need you to get to Spot 4421.

1591
01:22:47,520 --> 01:22:49,921
<i>You're gonna see a big old bag there.
Fill it up.</i>

1592
01:22:50,080 --> 01:22:54,449
And then I need you to proceed north onto
Figueroa and await further instructions.

1593
01:22:54,600 --> 01:22:55,647
Wait, wait.

1594
01:22:55,800 --> 01:22:59,930
And don't think we don't know you got the
law with you. That's something we do know.

1595
01:23:00,080 --> 01:23:03,289
<i>All right? So if any of them cavalry
follow you down in the garage...</i>

1596
01:23:03,440 --> 01:23:06,683
...I'm personally gonna stick a hot poker
so far up your son's ass...

1597
01:23:06,840 --> 01:23:10,561
...I'm gonna pop his teeth like popcorn!

1598
01:23:11,400 --> 01:23:12,686
See? We're back on track.

1599
01:23:13,560 --> 01:23:15,801
I gotta get that phone back.
So many dick pics.

1600
01:23:15,960 --> 01:23:17,724
- Really?
- Yeah, not all mine, though.

1601
01:23:18,240 --> 01:23:21,926
With game-time traffic, he could be here
in less than 10 minutes. How we doing?

1602
01:23:22,080 --> 01:23:24,162
- Almost done.
- Where are the bellhop costumes?

1603
01:23:24,320 --> 01:23:25,520
- What?
- Bellhop costumes.

1604
01:23:25,640 --> 01:23:28,564
Aren't we dressed as bellhops
when we escape with the money?

1605
01:23:28,720 --> 01:23:30,245
This place doesn't have bellhops.

1606
01:23:30,440 --> 01:23:31,487
- It doesn't?
- No.

1607
01:23:31,640 --> 01:23:34,120
I thought there was supposed to be
some sweet-ass...

1608
01:23:34,320 --> 01:23:36,482
- What the fuck are these?
- It's not Halloween.

1609
01:23:36,640 --> 01:23:38,927
- Best I could do on short notice.
- It's not scary.

1610
01:23:39,080 --> 01:23:41,162
- Hey, how do I look?
- Who the hell are you?

1611
01:23:41,320 --> 01:23:42,970
- It's me, Kurt.
- I know that part.

1612
01:23:43,160 --> 01:23:45,970
Terrible. You don't look like Bert,
you look like Mark Twain.

1613
01:23:46,160 --> 01:23:49,846
None of this is like I pictured when we
were planning it. Everything was cooler.

1614
01:23:50,040 --> 01:23:52,247
He just has to look good from a distance.

1615
01:23:52,400 --> 01:23:54,482
- Here we go. Let's do it.
- Let's roll.

1616
01:23:54,640 --> 01:23:58,326
Let's just do what we gotta do, do it
confidently and, uh, we should be fine.

1617
01:23:58,480 --> 01:24:00,164
- Here we go.
- Oh.

1618
01:24:00,320 --> 01:24:02,641
- Hi, boys.
- Oh, hi.

1619
01:24:02,960 --> 01:24:06,123
You staying at the hotel, or is this your hotel?
You staying here?

1620
01:24:06,800 --> 01:24:10,964
I've been keeping my eye on you
since you broke into my office.

1621
01:24:11,120 --> 01:24:14,090
I don't know what's going on here,
and I don't give a shit.

1622
01:24:14,240 --> 01:24:17,642
- Why are you here? What do you want?
- I think you know what I want.

1623
01:24:17,800 --> 01:24:19,370
No, I'm not gonna sleep with you.

1624
01:24:19,520 --> 01:24:21,841
Why can't this crazy bitch
get it through her head?

1625
01:24:22,000 --> 01:24:24,480
- Keep it respectful. Sorry.
- Are you kidding me?

1626
01:24:24,640 --> 01:24:27,086
- Don't call her that.
- I'm gonna make this simple.

1627
01:24:27,240 --> 01:24:29,402
I'm gonna call the police
and send you to jail.

1628
01:24:29,560 --> 01:24:30,686
- Don't do that.
- Come on.

1629
01:24:30,840 --> 01:24:32,604
Unless Dale plows me.

1630
01:24:33,120 --> 01:24:35,600
Why? Why me?
What is so special about me?

1631
01:24:35,760 --> 01:24:38,127
That's a fair question.
Everybody's wondering.

1632
01:24:38,280 --> 01:24:40,886
- I am.
- Did you ever collect anything, Dale?

1633
01:24:41,040 --> 01:24:43,327
- Don't get him going on this.
- What do I collect?

1634
01:24:43,480 --> 01:24:45,130
<i>- Tons of stuff.
- Encyclopedia Brown?</i>

1635
01:24:45,280 --> 01:24:48,045
- New Beanie Babies, makes no sense.
- Battlestar Galactica.

1636
01:24:48,200 --> 01:24:51,204
- Fine. I collect some stuff. Why?
- Okay, well, I collect cocks.

1637
01:24:51,360 --> 01:24:52,521
- Cogs?
- Julia.

1638
01:24:52,680 --> 01:24:54,728
- "Cocks."
- Oh, yeah. Well...

1639
01:24:54,880 --> 01:24:56,803
Mm-hm. Right up here.

1640
01:24:56,960 --> 01:25:01,522
I've got quite an impressive trophy room
filled with cocks.

1641
01:25:01,680 --> 01:25:02,966
- We're in there.
- Don't.

1642
01:25:03,120 --> 01:25:04,884
And at night, when I close my eyes...

1643
01:25:05,800 --> 01:25:06,881
...I reflect on them...

1644
01:25:07,920 --> 01:25:09,160
...I alphabetize them...

1645
01:25:09,880 --> 01:25:10,881
...I dust them.

1646
01:25:11,080 --> 01:25:12,730
Why are they dusty?

1647
01:25:12,880 --> 01:25:15,087
But there's one little problem, Dale.

1648
01:25:15,920 --> 01:25:19,720
See that space?
That empty space above the fireplace?

1649
01:25:20,360 --> 01:25:22,249
- See that?
- You got a cock missing?

1650
01:25:22,840 --> 01:25:27,243
That's reserved for the only man
who's ever said no to this.

1651
01:25:27,800 --> 01:25:29,882
Since I was 11 years old.

1652
01:25:31,040 --> 01:25:32,883
That's you, Dale.

1653
01:25:33,400 --> 01:25:34,481
My white whale.

1654
01:25:34,880 --> 01:25:38,805
Oh, okay. Well, I appreciate that.
I really do. That's sweet, I guess.

1655
01:25:38,960 --> 01:25:41,770
But, hey, here's an idea.
My friend Kurt here loves to plow.

1656
01:25:41,920 --> 01:25:44,207
- And maybe he could jump in for me...
- Absolutely.

1657
01:25:44,360 --> 01:25:46,442
I could pinch-plow. I
got a real green thumb.

1658
01:25:46,600 --> 01:25:51,925
We all know this is just the addiction talking.
If you're looking for more than a quick fix...

1659
01:25:52,120 --> 01:25:55,329
...I can provide you something
that's very meaningful, long-lasting.

1660
01:25:55,480 --> 01:25:56,811
What? What are you talking about?

1661
01:25:57,160 --> 01:25:58,366
I'm talking about us.

1662
01:25:58,520 --> 01:26:00,329
- Us? All of us?
- No.

1663
01:26:00,480 --> 01:26:01,561
- That's even better.
- No.

1664
01:26:01,720 --> 01:26:04,963
More the merrier. I love this idea.
You got a lot of stuff sticking out.

1665
01:26:05,120 --> 01:26:06,724
I got a lot of holes going in.

1666
01:26:06,880 --> 01:26:10,726
At one point of the night, you'd better
make sure that, that one is in this one.

1667
01:26:10,880 --> 01:26:13,531
- Thank you.
- That's not what I meant. You misunderstood.

1668
01:26:13,680 --> 01:26:18,049
I'm gonna go freshen up. Why don't you guys
suck each other off to get ready?

1669
01:26:18,680 --> 01:26:20,205
- Here we go.
- What are you doing?

1670
01:26:20,400 --> 01:26:21,890
What? She's making us fuck her.

1671
01:26:22,040 --> 01:26:23,849
- I'm not gonna fuck anyone.
- Thank you.

1672
01:26:24,000 --> 01:26:26,401
I'm willing to make love to her,
if that's required.

1673
01:26:26,560 --> 01:26:28,722
- Are you serious?
- Uh, can I borrow this razor?

1674
01:26:29,200 --> 01:26:30,326
Yeah. Go nuts.

1675
01:26:30,480 --> 01:26:32,642
Any requests? Landing strip? Dinner roll?

1676
01:26:32,800 --> 01:26:35,087
Uh, whatever's there.
We're in a rush. Thanks.

1677
01:26:35,240 --> 01:26:38,005
- Hmm.
- I don't wanna commit adultery on my wife.

1678
01:26:38,160 --> 01:26:41,482
No, it's not adultery if you're doing it
to save your family. Okay?

1679
01:26:41,640 --> 01:26:44,371
You think Stacy and your girls
are gonna wait for you...

1680
01:26:44,520 --> 01:26:47,000
...while you're in prison for 30 years?
- They're not.

1681
01:26:47,160 --> 01:26:49,731
Can't we just come up
with some kind of plan, though?

1682
01:26:49,880 --> 01:26:52,929
Oh, yes. Absolutely.
I got a plan. Okay, here we go. Um, areas.

1683
01:26:53,080 --> 01:26:54,764
I'll go butt, face, puss.

1684
01:26:54,920 --> 01:26:57,605
I cannot go in the puss.
That'll make me the most guilty.

1685
01:26:57,760 --> 01:27:01,207
- Good call. How about this? Butt, face, puss.
- That's where I should be.

1686
01:27:01,400 --> 01:27:03,402
I'm talking about a way where...
That's good.

1687
01:27:03,560 --> 01:27:06,484
If we're switching positions,
she'll lose track of who's where.

1688
01:27:06,640 --> 01:27:09,007
- Like the shell game.
- Three-card Monte. Exactly.

1689
01:27:09,200 --> 01:27:11,771
I can motorboat her boobies
and then smack on her butt.

1690
01:27:11,920 --> 01:27:14,446
So long as nothing is done
in a cheap or degrading way.

1691
01:27:14,600 --> 01:27:18,082
- We'll be as sensitive as Dr. Phil.
- I don't know if I can fuck this woman.

1692
01:27:18,240 --> 01:27:21,642
- Think about your wife and girls.
<i>- I'll</i> think about my girls. I can get it done.

1693
01:27:21,800 --> 01:27:24,087
- Ha.
- All right?

1694
01:27:25,320 --> 01:27:26,367
- Stacy.
- Oh, no.

1695
01:27:26,520 --> 01:27:28,443
- How did you find me?
- Been there a while?

1696
01:27:28,800 --> 01:27:30,404
Find My iPhone.

1697
01:27:31,120 --> 01:27:33,248
- I knew you were cheating on me.
- No, I'm not.

1698
01:27:33,400 --> 01:27:36,131
- He's not. We're trying to stay out of prison.
- Prison?

1699
01:27:36,280 --> 01:27:37,486
No one's going to prison.

1700
01:27:37,640 --> 01:27:40,610
- Because we were gonna kidnap someone.
- Kidnapping?

1701
01:27:40,760 --> 01:27:43,206
- No. First, the man kidnapped himself.
- That's right.

1702
01:27:43,400 --> 01:27:45,402
- He forced us...
- Dale wouldn't even do puss.

1703
01:27:45,560 --> 01:27:48,291
- I didn't even wanna do the puss.
- I chose ass both times.

1704
01:27:48,440 --> 01:27:52,161
I said puss will make me the most guilty.
You're not helping me! Shut up!

1705
01:27:52,320 --> 01:27:54,288
Look, uh, this is such
a stupid thing, honey.

1706
01:27:54,440 --> 01:27:56,886
And easy, and nothing sexual
is even happening here.

1707
01:27:57,080 --> 01:28:00,004
Come on, Dale,
this pussy isn't gonna eat itself.

1708
01:28:01,320 --> 01:28:02,321
- Julia?
- Stacy.

1709
01:28:02,480 --> 01:28:03,686
And the babies.

1710
01:28:03,880 --> 01:28:06,929
Look at those babies.
Oh, Dale, they look just like you.

1711
01:28:07,080 --> 01:28:08,605
- Listen to me.
- You are sick.

1712
01:28:08,800 --> 01:28:12,407
- I'm not sick. Please. Can I just...?
- Do not follow me. Do not follow me.

1713
01:28:12,720 --> 01:28:13,926
You fucking bitch.

1714
01:28:14,680 --> 01:28:17,251
Sorry. Really didn't
mean for that to happen.

1715
01:28:17,720 --> 01:28:19,848
Okay, Julia. You wanna fuck?

1716
01:28:20,200 --> 01:28:21,201
Yeah. Heh.

1717
01:28:21,560 --> 01:28:24,291
Why not, right? My marriage is over.
It's basically ruined.

1718
01:28:24,480 --> 01:28:26,687
So how about I ruin that pussy?
That sound good?

1719
01:28:26,840 --> 01:28:28,490
- No, no, no. You're face.
- I'm puss.

1720
01:28:28,640 --> 01:28:30,688
- Yeah.
- No, no, no. This one's all mine.

1721
01:28:30,840 --> 01:28:32,001
What?

1722
01:28:32,200 --> 01:28:34,441
- Let's do it. Let's do it in the shower.
- Attaboy.

1723
01:28:34,600 --> 01:28:36,921
Is that what you want?
Nice and wet in here.

1724
01:28:39,720 --> 01:28:42,690
- I can't save my marriage from prison.
- No, you can't.

1725
01:28:42,840 --> 01:28:44,524
- Great, Dale.
- Let's roll.

1726
01:28:50,600 --> 01:28:52,409
- We lost the wire.
- Shit.

1727
01:28:52,560 --> 01:28:54,562
Should we send in an unmarked?

1728
01:28:54,760 --> 01:28:56,922
We can't risk it. We'll hold here.

1729
01:29:11,960 --> 01:29:14,008
Hello. Howdy-do.

1730
01:29:14,200 --> 01:29:15,680
- You go on this side.
- Stop.

1731
01:29:15,800 --> 01:29:17,211
Hey.

1732
01:29:17,360 --> 01:29:18,646
What the fuck is this?

1733
01:29:18,800 --> 01:29:23,567
I do not need that sass-mouth. What I need
is that sack of cash. Now, get it over here.

1734
01:29:24,080 --> 01:29:26,731
Don't you throw it at me. You slide it.
Do it again.

1735
01:29:26,920 --> 01:29:28,684
- No, we'll keep it here.
- Check it.

1736
01:29:31,840 --> 01:29:33,763
- Holy shit.
- Lookie there.

1737
01:29:33,920 --> 01:29:35,922
- We did it.
- There's a pretty bag.

1738
01:29:36,080 --> 01:29:41,086
Okay. All right. Hey. I'll also take that
phone you took from the bottom of that bench.

1739
01:29:41,240 --> 01:29:42,401
What?

1740
01:29:42,600 --> 01:29:45,604
- The cell phone. Give me the cell phone.
- Throw the phone to him.

1741
01:29:45,760 --> 01:29:48,525
Now that fancy jacket and that snappy tie.

1742
01:29:48,680 --> 01:29:50,523
- Get them off. Get them over.
- No.

1743
01:29:50,680 --> 01:29:52,284
- He say "no"?
- I think he said no.

1744
01:29:52,440 --> 01:29:53,441
But we got this.

1745
01:29:53,600 --> 01:29:56,365
- Don't make me use this six-shooter.
- Man's got a shooter.

1746
01:29:56,840 --> 01:29:58,285
You make me sick.

1747
01:29:58,440 --> 01:30:01,410
You're what's wrong with America.
Everyone just wants a handout.

1748
01:30:01,560 --> 01:30:04,769
Take, take, take from the people
who earn their money honestly.

1749
01:30:04,960 --> 01:30:07,770
All right, let's not chitchat now.
The man does have a gun.

1750
01:30:07,960 --> 01:30:10,691
You got a real lip on you.
I will shoot you in the chest.

1751
01:30:10,880 --> 01:30:12,882
Well, go ahead. Shoot me.

1752
01:30:13,040 --> 01:30:16,362
- You don't have the balls.
- Yeah, he does. He got big old balls.

1753
01:30:16,520 --> 01:30:18,488
Big mouth. Nothing behind it.

1754
01:30:21,280 --> 01:30:22,400
- Dude.
- Oh, my God.

1755
01:30:22,560 --> 01:30:23,800
- What the fuck?
- Oh, my God.

1756
01:30:23,960 --> 01:30:25,041
What did you do?

1757
01:30:25,200 --> 01:30:26,611
- You shot him.
- No, I didn't.

1758
01:30:26,760 --> 01:30:28,888
- You did.
- That was not supposed to be loaded.

1759
01:30:29,040 --> 01:30:31,122
- What do you mean?
- That's not my fault.

1760
01:30:31,320 --> 01:30:32,481
- Oh, my God.
- Wait, hold...

1761
01:30:42,640 --> 01:30:46,167
Man. You should've seen
your faces right now...

1762
01:30:46,320 --> 01:30:48,004
...when you started blaming each other.

1763
01:30:50,400 --> 01:30:51,640
What's happening right now?

1764
01:30:52,240 --> 01:30:53,730
I'm fucking you over.

1765
01:30:53,920 --> 01:30:57,686
- No, no. But we're all friends now.
- We are, but what a great twist, right?

1766
01:30:57,840 --> 01:31:01,811
At first I was just gonna take all the
money and throw you guys under the bus.

1767
01:31:01,960 --> 01:31:03,325
I mean, come on. Duh.

1768
01:31:03,480 --> 01:31:07,769
But then when Dad called the cops and
proved he doesn't give a fuck about me...

1769
01:31:08,320 --> 01:31:10,607
...I realized, why take a
few of his millions...

1770
01:31:10,760 --> 01:31:13,809
...when I can inherit all of them
and you guys can take the fall?

1771
01:31:13,960 --> 01:31:18,284
In minutes, the police will be down here and
discover that you killed my poor father...

1772
01:31:18,440 --> 01:31:21,125
...with a gun you stole from my room
when you abducted me.

1773
01:31:21,280 --> 01:31:22,805
That is a lie!

1774
01:31:24,360 --> 01:31:26,886
- He knows.
- He knows. He knows.

1775
01:31:27,080 --> 01:31:28,764
Don't worry, guys-

1776
01:31:28,960 --> 01:31:30,689
I'll take it from here.

1777
01:31:30,880 --> 01:31:32,530
Sorry, Rex.

1778
01:31:32,880 --> 01:31:33,881
But we got you.

1779
01:31:34,040 --> 01:31:36,122
<i>Why take</i> a <i>few of his millions...</i>

1780
01:31:36,280 --> 01:31:38,851
<i>...when I can inherit all of them
and you guys can take the fall?</i>

1781
01:31:39,000 --> 01:31:40,684
Ooh. Checkmate, bitch.

1782
01:31:44,560 --> 01:31:47,040
- All right, here. Let's have that.
- Yeah. Yeah.

1783
01:31:47,200 --> 01:31:49,202
- No, I... Right. Sorry.
- Thanks, man.

1784
01:31:49,720 --> 01:31:52,405
Didn't wanna hold onto that
for two more minutes?

1785
01:31:52,600 --> 01:31:54,523
No, that was a gift.

1786
01:31:55,200 --> 01:31:58,010
- Did you park the Prius in the back alley?
- I sure did.

1787
01:31:58,160 --> 01:32:00,288
- Do you have the keys?
- Here you go.

1788
01:32:03,760 --> 01:32:05,967
I'm really proud of you guys.

1789
01:32:06,480 --> 01:32:10,007
Seriously. You pulled together.
You worked like a team. Just like we planned.

1790
01:32:10,320 --> 01:32:12,368
Dale, we had a lot of laughs.

1791
01:32:12,520 --> 01:32:15,091
I really appreciate it.
I mean, you made me smile.

1792
01:32:16,680 --> 01:32:20,002
Nick, I want you to smile more.
You know? Look at those frown lines.

1793
01:32:20,600 --> 01:32:22,682
Take a vacation. Lighten up.

1794
01:32:23,440 --> 01:32:26,091
- Kurt, I think I'm gonna miss you the most.
- Why?

1795
01:32:26,240 --> 01:32:27,924
Okay.

1796
01:32:28,080 --> 01:32:29,206
Bye.

1797
01:32:29,360 --> 01:32:30,407
Catch.

1798
01:32:30,600 --> 01:32:31,761
- Don't...
- Goddamn it.

1799
01:32:31,920 --> 01:32:34,571
Sorry. I just have good hands.
Fuck. Hang on a second.

1800
01:32:34,880 --> 01:32:36,086
Hey, freeze. Freeze.

1801
01:32:36,240 --> 01:32:39,084
Ha, ha. Dale, come on.
You think I'd give you a loaded gun?

1802
01:32:40,480 --> 01:32:41,606
Ah, Shit.

1803
01:32:42,240 --> 01:32:45,926
I gotta get going. Gotta wait to be saved
at the warehouse by the cops. See you.

1804
01:32:47,760 --> 01:32:51,606
Oh, shit. Good luck talking to the cops.
You have your dad's blood all over... Oh!

1805
01:32:51,760 --> 01:32:55,446
- Can we not keep anything to ourselves?
- Fuck me. I'm so sorry.

1806
01:32:55,600 --> 01:32:59,810
- That's worse than what I did. What did I do?
- You're friends with him. You introduced me.

1807
01:32:59,960 --> 01:33:02,884
We're not gonna be afraid of
an unloaded gun, Rex, you dipshit.

1808
01:33:03,040 --> 01:33:06,647
- He's got bullets. He's got bullets.
- He's got bullets? Fucking hell.

1809
01:33:07,040 --> 01:33:08,724
Kurt, what are you? A 32 waist?

1810
01:33:08,880 --> 01:33:11,406
- Oh, dear God. He's gonna rape us.
- No.

1811
01:33:11,600 --> 01:33:14,126
- Oh, you just want my...
- He just wants the pants.

1812
01:33:20,640 --> 01:33:24,645
All-time shittiest idea you guys ever had.
Can't believe you talked me into this.

1813
01:33:24,800 --> 01:33:26,928
- This guy's dead now.
- I know that.

1814
01:33:27,120 --> 01:33:29,122
- He's dead.
- We should've stayed cogs.

1815
01:33:29,280 --> 01:33:32,045
This is taking too damn long.

1816
01:33:32,760 --> 01:33:33,966
Shit.

1817
01:33:34,320 --> 01:33:36,607
This isn't about the bag.

1818
01:33:36,760 --> 01:33:38,603
This is the goddamn drop.

1819
01:33:38,760 --> 01:33:41,843
Move in. Everybody move in now.

1820
01:33:44,000 --> 01:33:46,970
- Take off the incriminating pants.
- Run around in my underwear?

1821
01:33:47,120 --> 01:33:49,480
Why not throw the body in the trunk?
We got 5 million bucks.

1822
01:33:49,640 --> 01:33:51,768
There's police everywhere.
We're not gonna get away.

1823
01:33:53,280 --> 01:33:54,850
Oh, shit.

1824
01:33:58,520 --> 01:34:01,364
- Grab the bag. Get the fuck in.
- Why?

1825
01:34:01,520 --> 01:34:04,171
Lead the cops to that warehouse
before your boy gets there.

1826
01:34:05,120 --> 01:34:09,330
If they see him out walking free,
they just might believe your ass. Let's go.

1827
01:34:10,360 --> 01:34:11,361
Get the money.

1828
01:34:26,080 --> 01:34:27,844
Hey. Hey, guys-

1829
01:34:28,000 --> 01:34:30,048
Goddamn it. It's those idiots.

1830
01:34:30,200 --> 01:34:33,283
I knew I never said anything
about kidnapping.

1831
01:34:33,440 --> 01:34:37,126
- Come on. Let's go.
- Following us is already a part of their plan.

1832
01:34:37,280 --> 01:34:40,489
- You never know. Wanna make sure.
- What is the seat-belt situation?

1833
01:34:40,640 --> 01:34:42,369
- I got mine.
- We should put them on.

1834
01:34:42,520 --> 01:34:44,966
- Can I get under yours?
- Hold on to the dashboard.

1835
01:34:47,080 --> 01:34:48,491
- Shit.
- This is the wrong way.

1836
01:34:48,640 --> 01:34:51,120
This is the wrong way. Turn around.
Stop the car.

1837
01:34:52,320 --> 01:34:53,810
- Who you texting?
- My lady.

1838
01:34:53,960 --> 01:34:57,089
- Put it down.
- If I don't check in, she goes crazy.

1839
01:35:01,840 --> 01:35:06,129
By the way, what the hell were you doing back
there in that garage in the first place?

1840
01:35:07,640 --> 01:35:09,085
What's that, now?

1841
01:35:09,240 --> 01:35:10,526
- Holy shit.
- What's going on?

1842
01:35:10,720 --> 01:35:12,961
You were down there
to steal the ransom money.

1843
01:35:13,120 --> 01:35:14,645
Listen, I hustle, I don't steal.

1844
01:35:14,800 --> 01:35:17,485
What the fuck does that...?
What were you doing in the garage?

1845
01:35:19,160 --> 01:35:20,844
I was thinking there was a chance...

1846
01:35:21,000 --> 01:35:23,685
...the drop might go south,
and that guy would kill y'all.

1847
01:35:23,840 --> 01:35:26,810
And in such a scenario,
you'd rather me have the cash than him.

1848
01:35:26,960 --> 01:35:29,486
- He was betting against us.
- You motherfucker.

1849
01:35:29,640 --> 01:35:33,281
- I was honoring your potential death.
- Honoring us?

1850
01:35:33,440 --> 01:35:34,487
What are we, samurai?

1851
01:35:34,640 --> 01:35:36,642
Wait, hold on. Oh, hey. Train.

1852
01:35:36,800 --> 01:35:38,848
- Train! Train! Train!
- Train!

1853
01:35:45,600 --> 01:35:47,011
- Nice! Woo-hoo!
- Damn it.

1854
01:35:47,160 --> 01:35:48,730
That's how you lose the cops.

1855
01:35:48,880 --> 01:35:51,690
- We're not supposed to lose the cops.
- Don't lose the cops.

1856
01:35:53,480 --> 01:35:54,891
That's the whole idea.

1857
01:35:55,040 --> 01:35:57,361
- It was a good thought.
- Going back. This is great.

1858
01:35:57,560 --> 01:35:59,881
I wish you'd slow down.
You wouldn't make mistakes.

1859
01:36:00,040 --> 01:36:02,646
Don't criticize the man.
He's doing the best he can.

1860
01:36:04,080 --> 01:36:06,048
Here, I'll let them know. Hold on.

1861
01:36:06,400 --> 01:36:08,880
Hey. We're back. We'll stay here...

1862
01:36:09,440 --> 01:36:11,283
...till all this shit goes by.

1863
01:36:11,440 --> 01:36:12,726
Then we'll all roll.

1864
01:36:13,240 --> 01:36:15,891
What the fuck are these assholes doing?

1865
01:36:16,080 --> 01:36:18,208
- They get that?
- Yeah, I think so.

1866
01:36:18,360 --> 01:36:20,727
- What's that you're carrying around?
- What is that?

1867
01:36:20,880 --> 01:36:22,211
It's for my kitties.

1868
01:36:22,360 --> 01:36:23,771
- You got kittens?
- Surprising.

1869
01:36:23,960 --> 01:36:26,804
- I can't have kittens?
- Why you always jumping on everything?

1870
01:36:26,960 --> 01:36:30,009
- It's weird you're hauling around a cat stand.
- I love pussy.

1871
01:36:30,320 --> 01:36:33,164
- Hey, can I hop out and piss?
- No. We're in a car chase.

1872
01:36:33,320 --> 01:36:36,722
- Super long train. I feel I could get it done.
- It is a lot of freight.

1873
01:36:44,680 --> 01:36:46,170
<i>Hold the line</i>

1874
01:36:46,360 --> 01:36:48,362
It probably needs...

1875
01:36:48,520 --> 01:36:49,806
<i>Love isn't always on time</i>

1876
01:36:55,120 --> 01:36:56,690
<i>Hold the line</i>

1877
01:36:56,840 --> 01:36:59,446
It's just too goddamn easy.

1878
01:37:36,160 --> 01:37:39,323
- I feel like I could have pissed by now.
- Let him go. Open the door.

1879
01:37:39,480 --> 01:37:41,323
- Caboose coming.
- Ah, shit.

1880
01:37:56,640 --> 01:37:58,324
Oh, shit. Cops.

1881
01:37:59,800 --> 01:38:01,131
- Cops. Cops.
- Shit.

1882
01:38:04,000 --> 01:38:05,720
- What happened?
- You lost your stuff.

1883
01:38:05,840 --> 01:38:08,081
- What? Damn it.
- Yeah, you lost your cat stuff.

1884
01:38:09,440 --> 01:38:11,761
Okay, there's a man there.
Watch out for him.

1885
01:38:11,920 --> 01:38:12,967
Hey! Hey! Hey!

1886
01:38:14,840 --> 01:38:16,922
- Hey, we're boxed in here.
- Not for long.

1887
01:38:17,080 --> 01:38:19,845
- No, no, no.
- I've always wanted to do this.

1888
01:38:22,440 --> 01:38:24,408
<i>Gotta make it last</i>

1889
01:38:24,560 --> 01:38:26,369
<i>I touch you once</i>

1890
01:38:26,520 --> 01:38:28,602
<i>I touch you twice</i>

1891
01:38:41,960 --> 01:38:43,166
Shit.

1892
01:38:50,440 --> 01:38:51,805
What?

1893
01:38:55,960 --> 01:38:57,041
So where is this place?

1894
01:38:57,240 --> 01:38:59,447
It's up here. Under the bridge.

1895
01:39:00,200 --> 01:39:03,124
- What are you doing?
- You're supposed to go under the bridge.

1896
01:39:03,280 --> 01:39:05,203
Relax.

1897
01:39:09,400 --> 01:39:11,402
- The wheels are locked.
- Pump the brakes.

1898
01:39:11,560 --> 01:39:13,050
- Shift down.
- Put it in park.

1899
01:39:13,200 --> 01:39:14,247
I can't think.

1900
01:39:27,760 --> 01:39:29,280
Bet y'all loving this fence now.

1901
01:39:29,440 --> 01:39:31,120
I've come around to the whole fence thing.

1902
01:39:31,240 --> 01:39:33,208
I would've loved a seat belt too.

1903
01:39:33,400 --> 01:39:35,880
Well, what's the next part of the plan,
Motherfucker?

1904
01:39:42,680 --> 01:39:43,920
Ow.

1905
01:39:49,760 --> 01:39:51,205
There. There. There.

1906
01:40:04,480 --> 01:40:06,642
- Hey. Hey, he's not here. We beat him.
- What?

1907
01:40:06,800 --> 01:40:07,961
- We beat him.
- Hey.

1908
01:40:08,320 --> 01:40:09,606
- Ha, ha!
- Hey, nice job...

1909
01:40:09,760 --> 01:40:12,923
- Where's Motherfucker?
- I don't know.

1910
01:40:13,680 --> 01:40:14,761
Cops. Cops.

1911
01:40:19,120 --> 01:40:20,565
<i>Hey-</i>

1912
01:40:23,040 --> 01:40:24,405
- Get out of the car.
- Easy.

1913
01:40:24,560 --> 01:40:27,564
- Hands up.
- Relax. Please, put your guns down.

1914
01:40:27,720 --> 01:40:29,961
We didn't kill anybody. I swear to God.

1915
01:40:30,120 --> 01:40:33,567
- I don't give a goddamn. Tell it to the judge.
- We didn't kidnap anybody.

1916
01:40:33,720 --> 01:40:36,041
He kidnapped himself.
He'll sneak in any second.

1917
01:40:36,200 --> 01:40:39,283
- He was supposed to be tied up to that chair.
- Right behind you.

1918
01:40:39,640 --> 01:40:41,722
Who? Him?

1919
01:40:42,560 --> 01:40:43,766
Yeah.

1920
01:40:43,920 --> 01:40:45,729
Aw, that looks bad. That looks bad.

1921
01:40:45,880 --> 01:40:48,201
- This fucking guy.
- You gotta believe us.

1922
01:40:48,360 --> 01:40:52,206
That's them. Those three, they tortured me,
then said they were gonna kill my dad.

1923
01:40:52,360 --> 01:40:54,522
- Oh, don't listen to that.
- That's garbage.

1924
01:40:54,880 --> 01:40:57,451
Tell me he's okay. Please.

1925
01:40:57,600 --> 01:40:59,921
- I'm sorry, son.
- No.

1926
01:41:01,240 --> 01:41:03,402
- No.
- He killed his father.

1927
01:41:03,560 --> 01:41:06,211
- He's a very strong actor. Bravo.
- Don't buy it.

1928
01:41:06,360 --> 01:41:08,280
- Get on the ground.
- We're getting down.

1929
01:41:08,360 --> 01:41:11,807
I can't believe you're buying that acting.
I mean, it's good, but...

1930
01:41:12,000 --> 01:41:14,321
You have the right to
remain silent, assholes.

1931
01:41:14,800 --> 01:41:17,770
You have the right to an attorney, asshole.
You have...

1932
01:41:22,200 --> 01:41:24,202
Hey. Hey, that's my phone. He has my phone.

1933
01:41:24,360 --> 01:41:26,806
- The phone Bert had on the bench.
- Check that phone.

1934
01:41:26,960 --> 01:41:30,806
If he was tied up here the whole time,
how could Rex have the same phone?

1935
01:41:30,960 --> 01:41:33,201
- They switched pants!
- Yeah. They got it.

1936
01:41:33,360 --> 01:41:35,328
- Check it.
- It's the same ringtone, sir.

1937
01:41:35,800 --> 01:41:37,723
Yeah. That's my phone.

1938
01:41:37,880 --> 01:41:40,531
I have the same ringtone.
It's an inspiring ringtone.

1939
01:41:40,840 --> 01:41:43,081
You were here this whole time
with a cell phone...

1940
01:41:43,280 --> 01:41:45,169
...and didn't bother to call the police?

1941
01:41:45,320 --> 01:41:47,368
- Ah! Ah, ha, ha!
- Yes.

1942
01:41:47,520 --> 01:41:49,329
Shut the fuck up.

1943
01:41:50,720 --> 01:41:51,721
Let me see it.

1944
01:41:51,880 --> 01:41:53,882
I said let me see it.

1945
01:41:54,560 --> 01:41:56,085
Okay.

1946
01:41:58,000 --> 01:42:01,288
- Everybody move the fuck off.
- Yeah, he looks pretty guilty now, right?

1947
01:42:01,440 --> 01:42:03,568
He's definitely suspect.

1948
01:42:03,760 --> 01:42:05,091
Drop your fucking guns.

1949
01:42:05,240 --> 01:42:07,925
You shoot this prick.
You shoot this prick right now.

1950
01:42:08,080 --> 01:42:11,607
You drop your guns or I'll blow
his fucking head off. You hear me? Move.

1951
01:42:11,760 --> 01:42:12,921
Move.

1952
01:42:14,720 --> 01:42:16,245
He's gonna get away with this.

1953
01:42:16,440 --> 01:42:18,920
- This guy doesn't quit.
- He's incredibly resilient.

1954
01:42:19,080 --> 01:42:22,084
- You. Keys in the car?
- Keys are in the car.

1955
01:42:22,280 --> 01:42:24,408
- This fucking guy.
- Calm down.

1956
01:42:24,560 --> 01:42:27,848
This fucking guy took everything from me.
"Calm down, Dale"? No.

1957
01:42:28,000 --> 01:42:30,924
- Fuck this fucking guy. He took my wife.
- All right, step away.

1958
01:42:31,120 --> 01:42:34,602
- He took my kids. I'm gonna do something.
- Easy. What are you gonna do?

1959
01:42:34,760 --> 01:42:37,969
- Look who's the predator now, bitch.
- Wait, Dale. What are you doing?

1960
01:42:43,680 --> 01:42:45,330
- Dale.
- Oh, I'm shot.

1961
01:42:46,960 --> 01:42:48,485
Get in there. Get him.

1962
01:42:48,680 --> 01:42:53,288
Cuff this crazy asshole. And beat the shit
out of him while you're at it.

1963
01:42:53,440 --> 01:42:55,329
- Oh, shit.
- Dale, buddy, you okay? Hey.

1964
01:42:55,520 --> 01:42:56,567
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, wow.

1965
01:42:56,720 --> 01:42:58,245
- Oh, shit.
- What was that?

1966
01:42:58,440 --> 01:43:01,125
Dale, let's put this down.
What was the plan here, buddy?

1967
01:43:01,280 --> 01:43:04,489
- I overreacted. It's not even sharp.
- Adrenaline.

1968
01:43:04,640 --> 01:43:05,971
Did it just graze me, or...?

1969
01:43:06,120 --> 01:43:08,964
No, you got hit right in the square
of the fucking chest.

1970
01:43:09,160 --> 01:43:11,242
- Went straight through.
- You're gonna be fine.

1971
01:43:11,400 --> 01:43:13,767
No, I don't know about that.
That's a lot of blood.

1972
01:43:13,920 --> 01:43:16,241
- Don't listen to him. You're gonna make it.
- Ah, fuck.

1973
01:43:16,400 --> 01:43:18,323
Hey, if you want hope, listen to him.

1974
01:43:18,480 --> 01:43:21,882
If you want the truth, I'm your fucking guy,
all right? This is bad news.

1975
01:43:22,040 --> 01:43:25,567
- Can we get some help here?
- Don't worry. We're gonna get you fixed up.

1976
01:43:25,760 --> 01:43:27,922
- Oh, Jesus Christ.
- Is it bad? Is it bad?

1977
01:43:28,320 --> 01:43:29,810
- That's a big fucking hole.
- Yeah.

1978
01:43:29,960 --> 01:43:33,442
- I'm gonna go to this light right here.
- If you've gotta go, you gotta go.

1979
01:43:33,640 --> 01:43:37,201
- Please don't let me die with him talking.
- I'll take care of Stacy and your boys.

1980
01:43:44,840 --> 01:43:47,810
- That couldn't be more annoying.
- I'm not trying to be annoying.

1981
01:43:47,960 --> 01:43:49,803
- I'm trying to have fun.
- It's annoying.

1982
01:43:49,960 --> 01:43:52,964
- It worked though. Look at that.
- Look who's talking. You okay?

1983
01:43:53,160 --> 01:43:55,891
You've been drifting in and out.
Nice to hear you talking.

1984
01:43:56,080 --> 01:43:58,162
So, what do the doctors say?
Am I gonna die?

1985
01:43:58,320 --> 01:43:59,481
- Yes.
- Yes?

1986
01:43:59,800 --> 01:44:01,564
- No.
- We're all gonna die.

1987
01:44:01,720 --> 01:44:04,041
It's been touch-and-go,
but you're gonna be fine.

1988
01:44:04,200 --> 01:44:05,565
Doctors are gonna let you out.

1989
01:44:05,720 --> 01:44:08,326
- That's good.
- They did have to give you a bird's heart.

1990
01:44:08,480 --> 01:44:09,845
- Oh, God.
- You okay with that?

1991
01:44:10,000 --> 01:44:11,161
- No.
- He's kidding.

1992
01:44:11,320 --> 01:44:13,971
- We're kidding.
- That heart would've been too old for me.

1993
01:44:14,120 --> 01:44:15,121
How long was I out?

1994
01:44:15,280 --> 01:44:16,611
- Two years.
- Really?

1995
01:44:16,760 --> 01:44:17,966
- Four days.
- That's better.

1996
01:44:18,120 --> 01:44:20,771
Why didn't you play?
Thought we were gonna say two years.

1997
01:44:20,920 --> 01:44:22,331
We've got a woman president.

1998
01:44:24,120 --> 01:44:25,167
Shit.

1999
01:44:25,360 --> 01:44:27,408
- Look who's here.
- Oh, my gosh. He's talking.

2000
01:44:27,560 --> 01:44:29,767
- You're talking. Hi.
- We'll leave you alone.

2001
01:44:29,920 --> 01:44:33,845
Please. Let me explain everything to you,
there are so many misunderstandings.

2002
01:44:34,000 --> 01:44:37,891
- It's okay. Julia explained everything.
- Don't talk to her. She's crazy.

2003
01:44:38,080 --> 01:44:41,323
She told me everything she put you through
because of her affliction.

2004
01:44:41,480 --> 01:44:42,766
"Her affliction"?

2005
01:44:42,960 --> 01:44:44,962
It's heartbreaking
what she's been through.

2006
01:44:45,120 --> 01:44:47,521
- Hi.
- She also told me that my husband...

2007
01:44:47,680 --> 01:44:50,365
...is the only one that ever resisted her.

2008
01:44:50,800 --> 01:44:53,883
- Okay.
- Dale, you are one lucky man.

2009
01:44:54,040 --> 01:44:56,646
Your wife is so understanding and caring.

2010
01:44:56,800 --> 01:44:59,690
- Right.
- So beautiful.

2011
01:44:59,840 --> 01:45:02,650
She has been so supportive with the babies.
And helpful.

2012
01:45:02,800 --> 01:45:05,883
Oh. Please, it's the least I can do
to make amends for my bad behavior.

2013
01:45:06,040 --> 01:45:07,087
Okay.

2014
01:45:07,240 --> 01:45:09,527
I'm gonna find Dr. Mike,
tell him you're talking.

2015
01:45:09,680 --> 01:45:13,241
Okay, good. Go get the doctor
because I'm feeling a little...

2016
01:45:13,400 --> 01:45:14,731
What is going on here?

2017
01:45:14,880 --> 01:45:18,726
What's up? I'm off the hook? No more
white-whale business? Or any of that?

2018
01:45:18,880 --> 01:45:21,406
- Mm-hm. No more. You're off the hook.
- Really?

2019
01:45:22,880 --> 01:45:27,204
Did you know that when men are in a coma
they can still get an erection?

2020
01:45:27,360 --> 01:45:29,931
It's true, Dale. Coma boners.

2021
01:45:30,080 --> 01:45:31,889
"Coma boner"? What?

2022
01:45:32,040 --> 01:45:37,171
Lots and lots of coma boners.

2023
01:45:37,320 --> 01:45:39,288
Think about it.

2024
01:45:39,440 --> 01:45:41,363
- Oh, shit.
- All right, well, I better go.

2025
01:45:41,560 --> 01:45:44,086
I'm booking a spa day for me and Stacy.

2026
01:45:47,200 --> 01:45:49,441
- I'm gonna fuck your wife, Dale.
- No, no.

2027
01:45:49,600 --> 01:45:52,843
No. Uh, no, you're not.
Hang on. Hang on. No.

2028
01:45:53,000 --> 01:45:54,968
- Hey, there she is.
- Boys.

2029
01:45:55,160 --> 01:45:59,449
You look fantastic. You know, I've been
sending you a lot of unanswered texts.

2030
01:45:59,600 --> 01:46:03,241
- That's not how you catch them.
- I think she said she's gonna fuck my wife.

2031
01:46:03,400 --> 01:46:06,244
- Thought she already did.
- That horse may have left the barn.

2032
01:46:06,400 --> 01:46:08,448
I figured those guys
have been bumping tacos.

2033
01:46:08,600 --> 01:46:11,683
- Super touchy-feely lately.
- I can't process this. This is too much.

2034
01:46:11,880 --> 01:46:14,087
Anyway, so, what's even going on?

2035
01:46:14,240 --> 01:46:17,084
- Did we get in trouble with the police, or...?
- We did, yeah.

2036
01:46:17,240 --> 01:46:19,971
- Yeah. A lot.
- We got arrested for a long list of felonies.

2037
01:46:22,440 --> 01:46:25,683
But because you took a bullet for
the detective, DA got rid of the biggies.

2038
01:46:25,840 --> 01:46:28,844
- Dropped some charges? Nice.
- You're like a little Kevin Costner.

2039
01:46:29,000 --> 01:46:30,206
You're our bodyguard.

2040
01:46:30,520 --> 01:46:33,444
Ha, ha. Pretty sweet. All right,
so I'm guessing we saved the business.

2041
01:46:33,600 --> 01:46:35,011
- Nope. We did not.
- We did not.

2042
01:46:35,360 --> 01:46:37,080
<i>The bank foreclosed</i> a <i>couple days ago.</i>

2043
01:46:38,480 --> 01:46:42,963
Going once, going twice, sold.
To D.H. Commercial Trust.

2044
01:46:43,160 --> 01:46:46,960
<i>But there's good news. The guy who
bought the company is keeping us on to run it.</i>

2045
01:46:48,760 --> 01:46:52,162
- If we bring that down to $300, you've got...
- Lupe. All right.

2046
01:46:52,320 --> 01:46:53,446
Hola, Lupe.

2047
01:46:57,080 --> 01:46:59,003
<i>- Uh, SkyMall?
- Sí, SkyMall.</i>

2048
01:46:59,640 --> 01:47:00,801
Great. That's great news.

2049
01:47:00,960 --> 01:47:03,930
- Uh, <i>SkyMall</i> order is ready to ship.
- The boss is gonna love that.

2050
01:47:04,080 --> 01:47:06,287
Yes. Let's go show him
these great numbers too.

2051
01:47:10,080 --> 01:47:11,684
Are we happy with these numbers?

2052
01:47:12,720 --> 01:47:13,881
They're pretty good.

2053
01:47:14,040 --> 01:47:15,963
- Room for improvement.
- We can do better.

2054
01:47:16,120 --> 01:47:17,246
Oh, my God.

2055
01:47:17,400 --> 01:47:20,609
I just realized. You actually thought
you were bringing me good news.

2056
01:47:20,760 --> 01:47:24,321
The three of you walked in with smiles
on your fucking pathetic faces.

2057
01:47:24,880 --> 01:47:27,360
Why were you born?
Why were the three of you born?

2058
01:47:27,520 --> 01:47:30,967
Looking at you is like looking out
over the Grand Canyon of ineptitude.

2059
01:47:31,120 --> 01:47:33,327
It's a wonder your parents
didn't smother you...

2060
01:47:33,480 --> 01:47:35,164
- Where you going?
- See you next week.

2061
01:47:35,320 --> 01:47:37,561
I have an idea.
Why don't you try a suicide pact?

2062
01:47:37,760 --> 01:47:41,810
And I'm not talking about throwing yourself
off a building or some sleeping-pills shit.

2063
01:47:41,960 --> 01:47:44,042
I'm talking about,
you fuck each other to death.

2064
01:47:44,360 --> 01:47:47,045
Where the fuck do you think you're going?
I own you!

2065
01:47:53,760 --> 01:47:58,800
Well, we have several franchise
opportunities available in your area.

2066
01:47:58,960 --> 01:48:01,725
But, uh, purchasing a store requires...

2067
01:48:01,880 --> 01:48:04,850
...a significant up-front investment.

2068
01:48:05,000 --> 01:48:07,844
Well, in that case...

2069
01:48:12,720 --> 01:48:14,688
...start me off with three locations.

2070
01:48:14,880 --> 01:48:18,043
I'm sure that we can accommodate you,
Mr. Jones.

2071
01:48:19,400 --> 01:48:22,370
Please. Mr. Jones? That's my daddy.

2072
01:48:22,520 --> 01:48:24,170
Call me Motherfucker.

2073
01:48:29,400 --> 01:48:31,209
Every... This guy.

2074
01:48:33,760 --> 01:48:37,924
Okay. First we tie up Rex in one
of those abandoned warehouses off 3rd.

2075
01:48:40,520 --> 01:48:42,204
First we're gonna tie up Rex...

2076
01:48:43,080 --> 01:48:45,606
First we're gonna tie up Rex...
Fuck off, everyone.

2077
01:48:45,760 --> 01:48:50,129
As soon as Bert's car is underground, heh,
the police lose...

2078
01:48:50,280 --> 01:48:52,362
Bert's car goes underground, right?

2079
01:48:52,520 --> 01:48:54,887
Police lose the signal from the wire.

2080
01:48:57,880 --> 01:49:01,168
Do you guys validate parking? Not you
personally, obviously, that'd be racist.

2081
01:49:03,880 --> 01:49:06,121
You're gonna pull into Space 4421...

2082
01:49:08,800 --> 01:49:09,801
I gotta call you back.

2083
01:49:11,320 --> 01:49:12,890
The bank foreclosed two days ago.

2084
01:49:14,240 --> 01:49:16,163
- Hey, but there is good news.
- Really?

2085
01:49:18,920 --> 01:49:19,967
"Really?"

2086
01:49:20,120 --> 01:49:21,963
We need to talk to somebody legitimate.

2087
01:49:22,120 --> 01:49:26,125
We need to find someone
who can get us our company back.

2088
01:49:27,840 --> 01:49:30,411
I can't take you to the next scene
any better than that. I can't.

2089
01:49:31,760 --> 01:49:34,081
Well, then I would marry Daniel Craig...

2090
01:49:34,240 --> 01:49:36,481
...I'd fuck Sean Connery
and kill Timothy Dalton.

2091
01:49:36,640 --> 01:49:40,247
I would marry Ed Helms, fuck Bradley
Cooper and kill Zach Galifianakis.

2092
01:49:40,400 --> 01:49:44,803
Marry Crackle, fuck Snap, kill Pop. Right?

2093
01:49:44,960 --> 01:49:46,720
Oh, my God.
Do you know what this looks like?

2094
01:49:46,840 --> 01:49:48,126
What?

2095
01:49:48,760 --> 01:49:50,569
It looks like we don't
know what we're doing.

2096
01:49:52,040 --> 01:49:53,880
Boy, I'd love it if you'd
stop saying my name.

2097
01:49:57,400 --> 01:49:59,368
Hang on a second. Hey, freeze.

2098
01:49:59,520 --> 01:50:01,682
Guess who's got the gun now.

2099
01:50:01,840 --> 01:50:03,171
Me.

2100
01:50:08,200 --> 01:50:10,009
Where do you think she learned it?

2101
01:50:10,200 --> 01:50:12,521
Maybe from the first movie.

2102
01:50:15,040 --> 01:50:18,931
- Get that chair ready. I'm gonna take a tinkle.
- Oh, but I'm thirsty.

2103
01:50:19,080 --> 01:50:20,445
Save me a shake.

2104
01:50:21,840 --> 01:50:23,410
I just can't say it.

2105
01:50:25,600 --> 01:50:27,648
So you wanna use the ransom...

2106
01:50:27,800 --> 01:50:29,006
What is it?

2107
01:50:29,160 --> 01:50:32,846
"Y'all plan to use the ransom
to save y'all business."

2108
01:50:33,000 --> 01:50:34,365
I just like to hear you say it.

2109
01:50:37,160 --> 01:50:38,207
Come on, man.

2110
01:50:38,400 --> 01:50:40,801
Help me help you get revenge
on my asshole...

2111
01:50:42,680 --> 01:50:44,762
- My asshole...
- Asshole dad.

2112
01:50:47,400 --> 01:50:50,961
You have to take what's yours in this...
In this...

2113
01:50:52,680 --> 01:50:54,569
- I mean, you have to...
- You have to...

2114
01:50:54,720 --> 01:50:57,166
- ...take what's yours in this life.
- Take it.

2115
01:50:57,320 --> 01:50:58,560
Grab it!

2116
01:51:00,360 --> 01:51:03,842
You will pass your empty,
sac-less ball sacs...

2117
01:51:04,000 --> 01:51:05,047
No, that's...

2118
01:51:06,800 --> 01:51:10,805
"Empty shriveled sacs." They're shriveled.
I should know that just looking at you.

2119
01:51:18,200 --> 01:51:20,680
That's your credit picture right there.

2120
01:51:24,040 --> 01:51:26,168
- Here comes the heavy.
- I smell dog shit.

2121
01:51:26,360 --> 01:51:27,805
- Do you really?
- Yeah.

2122
01:51:28,960 --> 01:51:30,485
It might be your acting.

2122
01:51:31,305 --> 01:51:37,191
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