1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Everyone is intimidated by a shark. Become
a Card Shark AMERICASCARDROOM.COM
2
00:00:28,962 --> 00:00:32,955
What up, my lovely females! This is
your boy, Costa, your host for the evening.
3
00:00:33,133 --> 00:00:37,194
Behind me is Thomas Kub's house.
Today is Thomas Kub's birthday.
4
00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:40,567
And this is Project X, yo.
5
00:00:48,581 --> 00:00:51,448
Hey, we want some pussy
6
00:00:56,222 --> 00:00:59,282
Hey, we want some pussy
7
00:00:59,459 --> 00:01:02,189
Birthday cake. Mm.
8
00:01:03,129 --> 00:01:05,893
- Dax, my dick is gonna get so wet tonight.
- Excuse me.
9
00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:08,967
Shit. Um, Mrs. Kub,
I thought you guys left already.
10
00:01:09,135 --> 00:01:13,128
- So, what's getting wet tonight?
- Uh...
11
00:01:13,306 --> 00:01:15,900
Nothing. I'm sorry about that, Mrs. Kub.
12
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- Who's your friend?
- Don't worry about him.
13
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We're shooting this birthday movie
for Thomas.
14
00:01:21,247 --> 00:01:23,579
Like this day-in-the-life type thing.
No big deal.
15
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He's still in the shower.
16
00:01:26,820 --> 00:01:28,219
See you later.
17
00:01:32,058 --> 00:01:34,288
Fuck me, that was close.
18
00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:38,257
Dax.
19
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Happy birthday, motherfucker!
20
00:01:50,009 --> 00:01:52,170
Whoa, shit! What the fuck, dude?
21
00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:55,509
- What the fuck?
- I'm jerking off to your mom.
22
00:01:55,682 --> 00:01:59,277
So, dude, it's your last day
of being a loser. How does it feel?
23
00:01:59,452 --> 00:02:01,750
You're such a dick, Costa.
24
00:02:01,921 --> 00:02:03,650
Shit never gets old.
25
00:02:05,558 --> 00:02:07,492
Wait for another day
26
00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:10,254
What's up, Dax?
How'd they rope you into this?
27
00:02:10,430 --> 00:02:12,295
He's one of J.B.'s guys from Gay-V Club.
28
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He's a fucking weirdo, I know,
but he's a solid shooter.
29
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And he's gonna make us look pimp,
and you fucking better.
30
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Thomas, get down here!
31
00:02:20,440 --> 00:02:22,271
Oh, shit. Let's go.
32
00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:26,578
You said your parents would be gone by 7.
33
00:02:26,746 --> 00:02:28,611
I don't wanna go talk to your fucking dad.
34
00:02:33,186 --> 00:02:36,849
No food in the living room. Your mother
will kill me and I'll have to kill you.
35
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- Here's 40 bucks for pizza, okay?
- Oh, cool.
36
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You guys can have that.
Knock yourself out.
37
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Back door or turn the alarm system off.
38
00:02:44,430 --> 00:02:47,922
And look, Thomas, I'm not an idiot.
I know you're gonna have friends over.
39
00:02:48,101 --> 00:02:50,968
- Dad, what do you think is gonna happen?
- Mr. Kub, honestly, we have no...
40
00:02:51,137 --> 00:02:53,332
Mm-mm. I'm sorry. Who are you?
41
00:02:53,506 --> 00:02:54,803
This is Dax.
What is this?
42
00:02:54,974 --> 00:02:58,034
He's shooting a movie
for my birthday, you know, a little present.
43
00:02:58,211 --> 00:03:01,271
Didn't know you had Goth friends.
He's just a friend from school.
44
00:03:01,447 --> 00:03:02,846
Four or five friends, tops.
45
00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:05,814
I'm just asking that you please
respect my house, okay?
46
00:03:05,985 --> 00:03:07,452
All right, fine.
47
00:03:07,887 --> 00:03:09,855
So leave the gate open for the gardener.
48
00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:13,083
And I know I don't need to tell you,
but my car is off limits.
49
00:03:13,259 --> 00:03:15,284
- Yeah, Dad, I know.
- Good. Okay.
50
00:03:15,461 --> 00:03:17,759
The pool heater, don't touch it.
51
00:03:17,931 --> 00:03:20,661
And also, guys,
do not go in my office, right?
52
00:03:20,833 --> 00:03:24,599
I have three projects I'm working on.
I don't want anybody in there, clear?
53
00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:27,103
- Get out, out, out.
- Dad...
54
00:03:27,774 --> 00:03:30,004
Nothing goes in here, right?
55
00:03:30,310 --> 00:03:33,837
Where's your mom?
I'm gonna get the bags.
56
00:03:35,915 --> 00:03:37,610
What's going on? What's the matter?
57
00:03:37,784 --> 00:03:39,479
- I'm just worried.
- About what?
58
00:03:39,652 --> 00:03:42,177
I don't know.
Thomas, leaving him alone all weekend.
59
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Oh, please, stop it. Come on, honey.
He's 17 years old.
60
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That's what I'm worried about.
61
00:03:48,695 --> 00:03:50,754
Let's be realistic here, okay?
62
00:03:50,930 --> 00:03:54,161
This is Thomas we're talking about.
He's not exactly Mr. Popular.
63
00:03:54,334 --> 00:03:58,065
- What is that supposed to mean?
- I'm just saying that he's not that type of kid.
64
00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:02,299
He's got a couple of friends. They're gonna
hang out, but they're not gonna do anything.
65
00:04:02,475 --> 00:04:04,705
He's a sweet kid, but...
66
00:04:05,812 --> 00:04:07,803
...he's a loser.
67
00:04:10,316 --> 00:04:12,784
Happy birthday to you
68
00:04:14,354 --> 00:04:16,322
- Happy birthday, Thomas.
- Whoo! Yay!
69
00:04:16,489 --> 00:04:17,820
All right, honey, car is here.
70
00:04:17,991 --> 00:04:19,583
- Boys, gotta get to school.
- Cool.
71
00:04:19,759 --> 00:04:22,250
Hold on. We gotta give Thomas
his birthday present.
72
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How cool is it that Thomas
was born on your anniversary?
73
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What a great anniversary gift, a baby.
74
00:04:27,900 --> 00:04:29,993
Happy birthday, sweetie.
Ahh.
75
00:04:30,169 --> 00:04:32,137
- Mom's minivan? Nice.
- Yeah.
76
00:04:32,305 --> 00:04:34,500
It's just for school and back.
That's it, right?
77
00:04:34,674 --> 00:04:37,336
- Yes. Thank you so much.
- Cool, right? You have a car now.
78
00:04:37,510 --> 00:04:39,102
I know.
- Okay.
79
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:42,908
And, Milo, you take good care of Thomas,
okay? Momma's gonna miss you.
80
00:04:43,082 --> 00:04:45,277
- Okay, bye.
- All right, see you guys.
81
00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:47,715
Every one of my phone calls
gets answered, right?
82
00:04:47,887 --> 00:04:49,650
- Yeah, I know.
- Every one. Okay.
83
00:04:49,822 --> 00:04:51,380
- All right, have fun.
- Bye.
84
00:04:51,557 --> 00:04:53,821
Happy anniversary.
85
00:04:54,927 --> 00:04:56,519
Get off me, you little faggot dog.
86
00:04:56,696 --> 00:04:58,186
- Yeah!
- It's on, motherfuckers!
87
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- Whoo!
- Dude, chill out. Goddamn.
88
00:05:02,535 --> 00:05:06,096
It was really cool of your mom and dad
to clean it out and wash it for you.
89
00:05:06,272 --> 00:05:09,036
It's a free car.
I'm not about to complain about a free car.
90
00:05:09,208 --> 00:05:12,803
It's not even a car. It's a fucking minivan.
We can't even roll in this.
91
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:16,278
Dude, too bad your dad didn't give you
the Benz. That'd have been sick.
92
00:05:16,449 --> 00:05:19,782
You know what, you're right, Costa.
Let's just take your car.
93
00:05:19,952 --> 00:05:23,388
- Oh, you don't have one.
- Good fucking joke, good fucking joke.
94
00:05:24,057 --> 00:05:25,957
So, dog, you ready for tonight?
95
00:05:26,125 --> 00:05:30,186
I actually wanna talk to you
about that, you know, before we jump into it.
96
00:05:30,363 --> 00:05:32,797
I knew it. You're bitching out.
What?
97
00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:35,557
What? Dude, I'm not bitching out.
98
00:05:35,735 --> 00:05:38,295
Thomas is bitching out
like the little bitch that he is.
99
00:05:38,471 --> 00:05:41,599
- Fuck you.
- Oh, my God.
100
00:05:43,710 --> 00:05:46,338
- Oh, shit.
- We need this party. You need this party.
101
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I'm just nervous.
What if nobody shows up? What if it sucks?
102
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That's not an option.
People will show up.
103
00:05:53,119 --> 00:05:55,553
Look at J.B. He's like a little fat
Rain Man, texting away.
104
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Dude, stop.
You're telling me he doesn't need this?
105
00:06:05,298 --> 00:06:08,358
Holy shit, dude. Your parents gave
you the minivan? That's awesome!
106
00:06:08,534 --> 00:06:11,094
- Yeah.
- Hey, Costa. Hey, Dax.
107
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That isn't happening. That's not real.
108
00:06:15,908 --> 00:06:18,001
Uh, excuse me...
Sorry.
109
00:06:18,177 --> 00:06:20,441
Hey, can I get to my locker right there?
110
00:06:20,613 --> 00:06:22,706
Dude, why are you staring at my dick?
111
00:06:24,250 --> 00:06:26,343
I wasn't. My locker's there.
Can I get to it?
112
00:06:26,519 --> 00:06:30,956
- Whatever, you fucking weirdo.
- Dude, just let it go. Just come on.
113
00:06:33,326 --> 00:06:37,023
- Hey, that's a sweet minivan, soccer mom.
- See? See what I told you?
114
00:06:38,598 --> 00:06:40,862
Is it true what I heard about you
at Zam's party?
115
00:06:41,033 --> 00:06:42,500
You got a blowjob from his mom?
116
00:06:42,668 --> 00:06:45,296
That party was so sick.
Everyone got laid.
117
00:06:45,471 --> 00:06:47,336
Wheelchair Robert even got a handjob.
118
00:06:47,507 --> 00:06:49,168
- Nice.
- Are you kidding me?
119
00:06:49,342 --> 00:06:51,674
Why the fuck weren't we
at that party, man?
120
00:06:51,844 --> 00:06:53,607
So we missed a party, dude. Big deal.
121
00:06:53,780 --> 00:06:56,078
It is a big deal. We miss every party.
122
00:06:56,249 --> 00:06:59,616
I mean, did you hear that guy?
Wheelchair Robert got beat off.
123
00:06:59,786 --> 00:07:03,153
I wanna show you something.
See this? Check this out.
124
00:07:03,322 --> 00:07:06,189
That's Stasia. Gorgeous, right?
That's my girl back in Queens.
125
00:07:06,359 --> 00:07:09,487
We could be crushing this kind of ass,
but we need a game changer.
126
00:07:09,662 --> 00:07:11,721
I mean, no one even knows who we are.
127
00:07:11,898 --> 00:07:14,958
If we want to be bigtime players,
we need to make a bigtime play.
128
00:07:15,468 --> 00:07:16,696
You feel me?
129
00:07:16,869 --> 00:07:19,337
J.B., what the fuck, man?
Why do you have a boner?
130
00:07:19,505 --> 00:07:22,167
- I don't, it's just my underwear sitting funny.
- Cover up.
131
00:07:22,341 --> 00:07:24,002
That's absolutely disgusting.
132
00:07:24,177 --> 00:07:27,078
It's easy to talk shit when
the party's not even at your house.
133
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Dude, please don't back out.
This party is gonna change everything for us.
134
00:07:32,485 --> 00:07:35,454
Okay. Well, I mean,
I'm the one taking the whole risk.
135
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All you do is show up and drink.
136
00:07:37,557 --> 00:07:39,821
You think we'd ditch you
if something went wrong?
137
00:07:39,992 --> 00:07:41,983
- I'm fucking offended, man.
- Yeah, me too.
138
00:07:42,161 --> 00:07:44,425
The idea behind tonight is
to get these bitches...
139
00:07:44,597 --> 00:07:46,565
...to recognize us as large-scale ballers.
140
00:07:46,732 --> 00:07:49,895
Back in Queens,
I had hoes blowing me on the reg.
141
00:07:50,069 --> 00:07:54,062
- I started hanging out with you two. Zero!
- I just don't really see the point anymore.
142
00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:57,641
How do you not see the point?
There's the point. There's the point.
143
00:07:57,810 --> 00:07:58,834
Okay.
144
00:07:59,011 --> 00:08:01,138
There's two more fucking points
right there! It's all around you.
145
00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:02,338
Dude, I get it.
146
00:08:02,782 --> 00:08:06,309
If you fuck this up, I will stab you.
I'm not kidding.
147
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,716
- Okay, no more than 20 people.
- Twenty people?
148
00:08:08,888 --> 00:08:10,719
- All right, 30 people.
- Thirty people?
149
00:08:10,890 --> 00:08:15,224
- To make sure my house doesn't get fucked.
- Thirty people won't change anything for us.
150
00:08:15,394 --> 00:08:18,124
All right, look, okay, 50 people,
absolute max.
151
00:08:18,297 --> 00:08:21,562
Fine, 50 people, absolute max.
152
00:08:21,734 --> 00:08:23,929
You know, just big enough to be cool.
153
00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:29,536
Sand, an adversary in many ways
more dangerous than those carrying weapons.
154
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:36,004
Mass marketing, handled.
155
00:08:48,828 --> 00:08:51,490
- Shh.
- Yeah, of course, Jack. Anything.
156
00:08:51,664 --> 00:08:53,859
And if you guys get there
before we get there...
157
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:56,297
...you can just get in the backyard
and set up...
158
00:08:56,469 --> 00:09:01,304
...and do what you gotta do.
- Dax, Dax. Go film over the top.
159
00:09:01,474 --> 00:09:04,034
Okay. Really, we appreciate that.
160
00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:07,111
Oh, uh... I have to call you back, sir.
I'm sorry.
161
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:09,475
What are you doing?
Get the fuck out of here!
162
00:09:09,649 --> 00:09:13,050
- What the fuck are you doing?
- Guys. Hey, guys, what the fuck?
163
00:09:14,654 --> 00:09:16,781
Are you fucking with me right now?
164
00:09:16,956 --> 00:09:19,254
Look.
That was a business call for your party.
165
00:09:19,425 --> 00:09:21,393
Who takes a shit and makes a business call?
166
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,688
Are you kidding?
Now you can shit in peace.
167
00:09:23,863 --> 00:09:26,798
Come on, dude. I can't see a thing.
It's dark as fuck in here.
168
00:09:30,803 --> 00:09:32,498
Dax, come on. Let's get closer.
169
00:09:32,705 --> 00:09:35,674
Heh, heh.
It should be pretty cool, I think.
170
00:09:35,841 --> 00:09:37,274
Basically chill.
171
00:09:37,443 --> 00:09:39,104
I'm letting Costa plan most of it.
172
00:09:39,278 --> 00:09:42,645
Oh, that sounds like a really
brilliant idea.
173
00:09:42,815 --> 00:09:46,683
No, he's doing a good job. He's getting,
like, a bunch of booze and then...
174
00:09:46,852 --> 00:09:48,615
...I think, like, a DJ.
175
00:09:48,788 --> 00:09:51,621
- A DJ. Super chill.
- Ha.
176
00:09:51,824 --> 00:09:55,555
Guess what Mama Kub
and Papa Kub got for...
177
00:09:55,728 --> 00:09:58,891
- Baby Kub?
... Baby Kub for his birthday.
178
00:09:59,065 --> 00:10:01,056
- What?
- The Kub Mobile.
179
00:10:01,233 --> 00:10:03,531
- They gave you the minivan?
- For my birthday, yes.
180
00:10:03,703 --> 00:10:05,534
Your parents give the worst gifts ever.
181
00:10:05,705 --> 00:10:07,332
- Where's your present?
- You serious?
182
00:10:07,506 --> 00:10:09,701
You haven't gotten me a present
in 10 years.
183
00:10:09,875 --> 00:10:11,274
So?
184
00:10:12,678 --> 00:10:16,637
But since I am a better friend than you,
I did get you something.
185
00:10:16,816 --> 00:10:19,444
- Oh.
- I'll bring it tonight. Hey, I have to go run.
186
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,951
- Happy birthday, loser.
- Ow.
187
00:10:23,556 --> 00:10:24,887
- Don't trip.
- Ow!
188
00:10:25,057 --> 00:10:27,685
Oh, shit!
I'm okay! Heh.
189
00:10:27,860 --> 00:10:30,522
Thomas, suck my cock.
What?
190
00:10:30,696 --> 00:10:34,257
- "Mama Kub and Papa Kub"? Jesus.
- Yeah, those are my parents, asshole.
191
00:10:35,701 --> 00:10:37,760
Damn, she's so fucking hot, dude.
192
00:10:38,738 --> 00:10:41,798
- Think she'll come tonight?
- I'm not inviting her. You do this one.
193
00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:45,603
Alexis won't come.
She fucks college dudes.
194
00:10:50,683 --> 00:10:54,119
"Lamel"? What? I don't know any Lamel.
195
00:10:54,286 --> 00:10:55,446
No, he's cool.
196
00:10:55,621 --> 00:10:58,590
Guys, the last thing I want in my house
is a bunch of randoms.
197
00:10:58,758 --> 00:11:01,591
Wrong. Last thing you want
is nobody at your fucking house.
198
00:11:01,761 --> 00:11:05,663
The more word gets around, the more likely
these chicks will show up at our party.
199
00:11:07,099 --> 00:11:09,795
Watch and learn how
Captain Big Dick does it.
200
00:11:12,705 --> 00:11:15,367
Hey, girls. Just remember,
wear something tight.
201
00:11:17,877 --> 00:11:20,903
What's up, sisters?
Thomas Kub's house, 8:00.
202
00:11:21,080 --> 00:11:23,207
Come get a piece of this white chocolate.
203
00:11:23,382 --> 00:11:26,044
Are you gonna be going to
Thomas's birthday party tonight?
204
00:11:26,218 --> 00:11:28,345
- Thomas? Who's that?
- Who's Thomas?
205
00:11:32,091 --> 00:11:35,060
That thing that dick in
the sweater vest was telling us about?
206
00:11:35,227 --> 00:11:37,058
What's up, baby? Eight o'clock.
207
00:11:41,300 --> 00:11:43,200
What are your expectations
for the party?
208
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:46,099
Get high, fuck bitches, you already know.
209
00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:49,400
- I think we'll come. Can we bring people?
- Can I bring people?
210
00:11:49,575 --> 00:11:51,702
Thomas Kub's house, 8:00.
211
00:11:58,684 --> 00:12:00,379
Oh, shit!
212
00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:02,244
Ahh!
213
00:12:04,056 --> 00:12:07,457
What we are witnessing is truly
a breathtaking moment...
214
00:12:07,626 --> 00:12:09,617
...in the life of young Thomas.
215
00:12:09,795 --> 00:12:14,698
The helpless fetus is growing
a tiny, tiny penis...
216
00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:20,232
...a penis he may someday insert
into this female's vagina...
217
00:12:20,539 --> 00:12:26,136
...should he survive his first encounter
without her eating him.
218
00:12:39,825 --> 00:12:41,816
Paper towels. Get long.
219
00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:43,985
- Don't!
- Dude, get a ton.
220
00:12:44,163 --> 00:12:47,564
Oh, shit. Extra-large condoms.
I'm not paying for that shit.
221
00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:51,528
Attention, valued shoppers.
222
00:12:51,704 --> 00:12:52,728
Oh, my God.
223
00:12:52,905 --> 00:12:56,341
Join us for an evening of balls-deep
entertainment at Thomas Kub's house.
224
00:12:56,509 --> 00:12:57,999
Dude, stop.
225
00:13:01,213 --> 00:13:05,274
Hey, little buddy.
Want something to drink? Hey.
226
00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:08,648
He's gonna catch him
and he's gonna get his ass kicked.
227
00:13:13,025 --> 00:13:15,152
You guys, we good on OJ?
Sunny D, dude.
228
00:13:15,327 --> 00:13:17,625
Grab it. Throw it in. I love...
229
00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:19,162
How are we doing on eggs?
230
00:13:21,133 --> 00:13:23,567
Holy shit, dude. It's Miles Teller.
231
00:13:24,904 --> 00:13:27,702
- Dude, it is. That's him. Holy shit.
- He's so badass.
232
00:13:27,873 --> 00:13:30,239
Yeah, my boy's starting
at second base for USC.
233
00:13:30,409 --> 00:13:32,877
He got sent to detention once
and banged the teacher.
234
00:13:33,045 --> 00:13:35,036
Mi-Tell, what's cracking, bro?
235
00:13:35,214 --> 00:13:37,808
- We go to North Pass.
- Yeah, dude, big fans.
236
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:40,645
- Huge fans.
- Cool. Awesome.
237
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,720
Look, we're making a movie.
238
00:13:43,522 --> 00:13:46,320
Invite him, man. Come on.
All right. Okay. Um...
239
00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:51,691
We're having a soirée at my place tonight.
If you wanna swing by, it should be...
240
00:13:51,864 --> 00:13:54,059
My boy is underselling this
like a motherfucker.
241
00:13:54,233 --> 00:13:56,599
This shit's gonna be legit.
You should swing by.
242
00:13:56,769 --> 00:14:00,205
Yeah, I can't. I actually got other plans
tonight, so I might not make it.
243
00:14:00,372 --> 00:14:04,365
Dude, think about it. It's on Dickens Street.
We'd love to have you.
244
00:14:04,543 --> 00:14:06,443
- Uh, Dickens Street?
- Yeah.
245
00:14:06,612 --> 00:14:08,477
That's your party? You're throwing that?
246
00:14:08,647 --> 00:14:10,911
That's where I'm going.
Heard it's gonna be crazy.
247
00:14:11,083 --> 00:14:13,847
That's my party. I'm Thomas Kub.
It's my birthday today.
248
00:14:14,019 --> 00:14:16,579
Yeah, I heard it's gonna be unlimited
high-school pussy.
249
00:14:16,755 --> 00:14:19,053
Dude, high-school pussy for days.
250
00:14:19,225 --> 00:14:22,126
What? Mind your own business, lady.
251
00:14:22,294 --> 00:14:24,319
How you guys doing on liquor?
You got liquor?
252
00:14:24,496 --> 00:14:25,520
Uh...
253
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:28,963
Don't even worry about it, man.
I'll bring it, call my boys up.
254
00:14:29,134 --> 00:14:31,625
- Don't want you to sweat anything.
- Thank you so much.
255
00:14:31,804 --> 00:14:34,238
Hey, it's your day. Cool.
See you guys tonight, then.
256
00:14:34,406 --> 00:14:36,237
- All right, cool.
- Dickens Street.
257
00:14:36,408 --> 00:14:39,275
- Teller, bring your mitt. We'll play catch.
- No.
258
00:14:39,445 --> 00:14:41,436
- Fuck.
- "Bring your mitt"? The fuck?
259
00:14:41,614 --> 00:14:43,605
Nothing like black pussy on my dick
260
00:14:43,782 --> 00:14:45,545
Word to the motherfucking DJ Quik
261
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:48,152
Okay, here's what I want.
262
00:14:48,687 --> 00:14:51,349
Party's limited to the backyard, okay?
263
00:14:51,523 --> 00:14:54,424
The house'll be locked
and the alarm'll be set.
264
00:14:55,160 --> 00:14:57,355
- No one is going inside, all right?
- Stop.
265
00:14:57,529 --> 00:14:59,656
- Throw down in the bushes?
- I don't care.
266
00:14:59,832 --> 00:15:02,995
If I don't fuck a girl with big tits tonight,
I'm drowning myself.
267
00:15:03,168 --> 00:15:06,228
Don't care if she's 300 pounds.
I have to fuck a girl with big tits.
268
00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:08,305
Oh, my God.
Feel my drift, J. B?
269
00:15:08,474 --> 00:15:09,566
Sure do.
270
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:14,179
I mean, I'd love to get some oral or,
you know, at least do some finger-banging.
271
00:15:14,346 --> 00:15:17,110
What? Finger-banging?
Can you please elaborate?
272
00:15:17,316 --> 00:15:20,342
You take your first finger,
your thumb and your middle finger.
273
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:22,451
Make a "come here" motion. "Come here. "
274
00:15:22,621 --> 00:15:25,181
This is called "machine guns"
or "friendly scissors. "
275
00:15:25,357 --> 00:15:27,791
The "circle of pleasure. "
The "itsy-bitsy spider. "
276
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:29,928
Tapping and circling. Tap, tap, tap.
277
00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:32,359
Keep telling her how pretty
she is the whole time.
278
00:15:32,531 --> 00:15:33,998
Shut the fuck up!
279
00:15:34,166 --> 00:15:36,634
- Your loss, man. It's good knowledge.
- Oh, my God.
280
00:15:36,802 --> 00:15:39,965
Straight up here, then take a right again.
All right, listen.
281
00:15:40,139 --> 00:15:43,939
The three of us will have full access
to the house for sex and finger-banging.
282
00:15:44,109 --> 00:15:46,304
Yes.
But no one else, okay?
283
00:15:46,478 --> 00:15:48,469
Of course, bro, we got your back.
284
00:15:48,647 --> 00:15:50,012
- Hey, take a right.
- Here?
285
00:15:50,182 --> 00:15:52,878
You're gonna want to lock your doors.
Are you serious?
286
00:15:53,052 --> 00:15:55,714
Yes, I'm serious.
Where the fuck are we going?
287
00:15:55,888 --> 00:15:58,789
T- Rick's.
Gotta score some of that chronic shit.
288
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,449
Are you sure this guy's cool?
T- Rick's the coolest.
289
00:16:01,627 --> 00:16:04,824
He's ex-military. Wait till you see
his gun collection. Fucking insane.
290
00:16:04,997 --> 00:16:06,328
This place is ghetto as fuck.
291
00:16:06,498 --> 00:16:09,831
Why do we have to come
all the way here? We can't just get it at school?
292
00:16:10,002 --> 00:16:12,800
Where do you think the school gets it?
This is wholesale.
293
00:16:12,972 --> 00:16:15,440
You are literally retarded.
294
00:16:15,607 --> 00:16:17,802
Ah, shut the fuck up.
295
00:16:18,243 --> 00:16:20,177
Ah! Fuck.
296
00:16:20,346 --> 00:16:21,938
T- Rick, open up.
297
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:27,649
- Hey, hey, hey.
- Hey, what's up, bro?
298
00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:30,550
- I haven't seen you in a minute, Costa.
- Yeah.
299
00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:33,419
- Nice to see you.
- How are you doing? Everything copacetic?
300
00:16:33,592 --> 00:16:36,152
Everything's great. You upgraded the dish.
Looks great.
301
00:16:36,328 --> 00:16:38,296
Yeah, I fucking did, upscaled it.
302
00:16:38,464 --> 00:16:40,125
- Upscaled it. I fucking did.
- Yeah.
303
00:16:40,299 --> 00:16:42,233
- These are my boys, J.B. And Thomas.
- Hi.
304
00:16:42,401 --> 00:16:45,029
All right, yeah, yeah.
Come on in, come on in.
305
00:16:50,109 --> 00:16:54,341
Oh, yeah, that was a 12-millimeter
semi-automatic Mossberg Maverick.
306
00:16:54,513 --> 00:16:57,914
- I'd love to go to the range with you.
- Yeah, that's a good idea.
307
00:16:58,083 --> 00:17:01,348
Going on the range,
get it all out of your system.
308
00:17:01,954 --> 00:17:03,888
Pretend you're killing cops, if you want.
309
00:17:04,056 --> 00:17:05,990
You're beautiful
310
00:17:06,825 --> 00:17:09,953
You're beautiful, it's true
311
00:17:11,830 --> 00:17:14,196
I saw your face
312
00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:16,858
In a crowded place
313
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:20,267
All right, well, I'll get your stuff.
Here, stoke up the fires, buddy.
314
00:17:20,439 --> 00:17:22,339
Oh, man, you the man.
Fuck, yeah, T-Rick.
315
00:17:22,508 --> 00:17:24,408
Yeah, kick ass with that.
316
00:17:25,177 --> 00:17:26,735
Hey, can we get going?
317
00:17:28,847 --> 00:17:31,714
Costa, come sit down, dude.
He's about to fucking...
318
00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:34,853
Check it out.
What are you doing?
319
00:17:35,020 --> 00:17:36,453
Fucking stop.
320
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:39,820
That's technically a homosexual act.
321
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:43,351
I'm coming on Santa Claus's face.
322
00:17:43,529 --> 00:17:45,258
Costa, he's coming back.
323
00:17:45,431 --> 00:17:47,831
- Dax, take it, take it.
- What the fuck are you doing?
324
00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:50,662
Dude, are you stealing it?
No, we're just borrowing it.
325
00:17:50,836 --> 00:17:53,100
We need a fucking mascot for the party.
326
00:17:54,973 --> 00:17:56,338
Jesus Christ.
327
00:17:56,508 --> 00:17:58,032
Here you go.
328
00:17:58,210 --> 00:18:00,542
Let's do this, I gotta be at the dojo by 5.
329
00:18:00,712 --> 00:18:02,111
- Absolutely.
- Cool.
330
00:18:04,016 --> 00:18:07,383
See, I told you guys,
T- Rick's just a sweetheart. Mm.
331
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:09,948
Smell it, J.B.
332
00:18:10,122 --> 00:18:12,955
- You little fucking cocksuckers!
- Oh, fuck!
333
00:18:13,125 --> 00:18:15,218
- Give me back my fucking gnome!
- Fuck!
334
00:18:15,394 --> 00:18:18,192
Give him the gnome back.
Give him the fucking gnome back.
335
00:18:18,363 --> 00:18:20,388
No, fuck that! Just go.
Get out of here!
336
00:18:20,566 --> 00:18:22,591
Oh, shit!
Oh, fuck!
337
00:18:23,669 --> 00:18:27,036
Holy shit, Thomas, he's fucking wild!
He's a fucking crazy man!
338
00:18:27,206 --> 00:18:29,606
Holy shit! He's gone! He fell off!
339
00:18:32,578 --> 00:18:34,603
- Holy shit, man!
- Holy shit!
340
00:18:38,083 --> 00:18:39,550
Shit, shit, shit!
341
00:18:39,718 --> 00:18:43,119
That's my boy Tom! That was
some serious fucking shit right there!
342
00:18:43,288 --> 00:18:44,721
What in the fucking world?
343
00:18:44,890 --> 00:18:47,450
Fuck. Shit.
344
00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:49,924
Oh, my God.
Shit.
345
00:18:50,262 --> 00:18:53,197
God, dude,
he fucking cracked my windshield.
346
00:18:53,365 --> 00:18:57,563
Fuck it, my cousin owns a body shop.
He can fix it, no problem, man.
347
00:18:58,036 --> 00:18:59,936
The kung fu no good here.
348
00:19:00,105 --> 00:19:02,938
- Oh, fuck! Holy shit!
- Give me back my gnome!
349
00:19:03,108 --> 00:19:06,839
Holy shit!
Guy's like the fucking Terminator! Jesus!
350
00:19:07,012 --> 00:19:10,641
- No, he was super pissed though.
- Dude scares the shit out of me.
351
00:19:11,850 --> 00:19:13,249
Hey, boss.
352
00:19:13,418 --> 00:19:14,783
What the fuck?
353
00:19:14,953 --> 00:19:17,717
There he is.
This is Everett and his boy Tyler.
354
00:19:17,890 --> 00:19:19,721
They're running security for the night.
355
00:19:19,892 --> 00:19:22,383
Are you serious? Are those nunchucks?
356
00:19:22,561 --> 00:19:23,721
- Yeah.
- Oh, shit.
357
00:19:23,896 --> 00:19:25,989
- Look like ninjas.
- Ninjas are fucking pussies!
358
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:27,598
- I love this kid.
- You know it.
359
00:19:27,766 --> 00:19:29,893
With these two,
we got nothing to worry about.
360
00:19:30,068 --> 00:19:31,899
- We're outside the Kub house.
- Hey.
361
00:19:32,070 --> 00:19:34,061
- We have bogeys.
- What up, Costa?
362
00:19:34,239 --> 00:19:35,638
Do I know you guys?
363
00:19:35,807 --> 00:19:38,071
We heard about your shindig tonight.
We want in.
364
00:19:38,243 --> 00:19:39,335
- You freshmen?
- Yeah.
365
00:19:39,511 --> 00:19:42,071
- Get the fuck out of here, man.
- Come on, dude.
366
00:19:42,247 --> 00:19:45,478
Are you still talking?
Get the fuck out of here.
367
00:19:45,884 --> 00:19:46,908
Dick!
368
00:19:49,488 --> 00:19:52,218
J.B., drop those bags.
We got work to do.
369
00:19:57,763 --> 00:20:00,027
Hi. Good evening, Mrs. Stillson.
My name's Oliver.
370
00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:01,723
This is my friend Jonathan.
371
00:20:01,900 --> 00:20:04,368
- And we're both friends of Thomas Kub's.
- Oh.
372
00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:07,096
Yeah, we're hosting a little birthday party
for Thomas.
373
00:20:07,272 --> 00:20:09,968
And we wanted to give you
the courtesy of informing you...
374
00:20:10,142 --> 00:20:12,770
...that there'd possibly be
a bit of party-related noise.
375
00:20:12,945 --> 00:20:16,176
I wanted to give you my number
in case you had problems or concerns.
376
00:20:16,348 --> 00:20:19,283
You're a very beautiful woman.
Call me anytime you want.
377
00:20:19,451 --> 00:20:22,545
- Thank you. That's very sweet of you.
- I mean that when I say that.
378
00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:23,915
You are very beautiful.
379
00:20:24,089 --> 00:20:26,148
A little party for Thomas. He lives there.
380
00:20:26,325 --> 00:20:27,587
Am I invited?
381
00:20:27,759 --> 00:20:29,954
- Yeah, dude, fine. Yeah, you can come by.
- Nice.
382
00:20:30,128 --> 00:20:32,528
Thank you very much.
Have a good time at your party.
383
00:20:32,698 --> 00:20:35,258
Thank you, I appreciate this.
Come by anytime you want.
384
00:20:35,434 --> 00:20:37,095
- All right, see you.
- All right.
385
00:20:37,269 --> 00:20:38,736
- Bye, baby.
- See you guys.
386
00:20:50,882 --> 00:20:52,247
DJ's over there.
Cool.
387
00:20:52,417 --> 00:20:55,284
- Um, got the bar set up over here.
- Nice.
388
00:20:55,454 --> 00:20:57,012
- Karaoke in the pool house.
- Nice.
389
00:20:57,189 --> 00:21:00,488
Holy shit, dude!
Where'd you get a bouncy-house?
390
00:21:00,659 --> 00:21:02,957
- Costa hooked it up.
- You know it, baby.
391
00:21:03,462 --> 00:21:07,057
Fifty bucks extra with the port-a-potty.
And they threw these in for free.
392
00:21:07,232 --> 00:21:10,599
Nice touch.
Why not? It's a birthday party.
393
00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:12,134
You wanna help? Do something.
394
00:21:12,304 --> 00:21:15,296
- Hey, Chubs, grab your twin brother there.
- Fucking dick.
395
00:21:15,474 --> 00:21:18,102
- Hey, dudes, check it out.
- Yeah, like that's gonna work.
396
00:21:18,277 --> 00:21:21,542
Yes, it is gonna work. Next time
your pool guy's here, he'll be like:
397
00:21:21,713 --> 00:21:24,978
"Excuse me, Mr. Kub. I seem
to have found some water in your semen. "
398
00:21:25,150 --> 00:21:26,879
That's fucking disgusting.
399
00:21:31,189 --> 00:21:33,157
J.B., I thought I told you to pick up ice.
400
00:21:33,325 --> 00:21:35,657
I did. It's in the freezer in the garage.
401
00:21:35,827 --> 00:21:38,694
- What the fuck are you doing?
- Getting in shape for the party.
402
00:21:38,864 --> 00:21:41,697
- The party's in three hours.
- It's mostly water weight.
403
00:21:41,867 --> 00:21:44,995
- Wrestlers do it all the time.
- Wrestlers also wrestle all the time.
404
00:21:45,170 --> 00:21:46,330
- Crank this thing up.
- No.
405
00:21:46,505 --> 00:21:48,837
It's not gonna work
unless you crank it up.
406
00:21:50,609 --> 00:21:52,474
Stop. Stop. Stop.
407
00:21:52,644 --> 00:21:54,737
- Let's go, come on.
- Dax. Dax, help me.
408
00:21:54,913 --> 00:21:57,347
- No, Dax, you're here to observe.
- Help me! Dax! Aah!
409
00:21:57,516 --> 00:22:02,681
Jesus Christ! Are you all right, dude?
Oh, my God, J.B., are you all right?
410
00:22:02,854 --> 00:22:06,119
An hour from now,
this place is a fucking madhouse.
411
00:22:06,291 --> 00:22:09,385
Not a madhouse, just gonna be a fun,
decent-sized party.
412
00:22:09,561 --> 00:22:12,860
Relax. For you. You.
413
00:22:13,031 --> 00:22:14,726
Me. Dax.
414
00:22:14,900 --> 00:22:16,834
Thank you, I don't drink alcohol.
415
00:22:17,002 --> 00:22:18,765
Okay, faggot.
416
00:22:18,937 --> 00:22:22,737
- To one sick fucking night.
- Cheers.
417
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:30,874
Come on over, over
418
00:22:35,454 --> 00:22:36,478
Shit! Come on!
419
00:22:36,655 --> 00:22:39,522
Yes. How are you so fucking bad
at this game, Costa?
420
00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:42,216
Shut up, Kirby.
You're killing my concentration right now.
421
00:22:42,394 --> 00:22:44,362
Ha, ha! Thomas, come here!
Fucker!
422
00:22:44,529 --> 00:22:46,429
I'm kicking Costa's ass!
423
00:22:46,998 --> 00:22:48,522
Oh, watch this.
424
00:22:48,700 --> 00:22:50,691
Shit!
It looks like I win.
425
00:22:50,869 --> 00:22:53,201
- Fuck you.
- You guys, it's like 9:20 already.
426
00:22:53,372 --> 00:22:55,840
Dude, relax.
People are gonna show up. I promise, bro.
427
00:22:56,007 --> 00:22:58,703
- Getting late.
- I'll look like such a dick if no one shows.
428
00:22:58,877 --> 00:23:02,813
Shut the fuck up. It's pissing me off that
you don't trust me to know what I'm doing.
429
00:23:02,981 --> 00:23:06,212
I'm the hub of a large social circle.
I put the word out, it goes out.
430
00:23:06,385 --> 00:23:07,875
Okay, cool.
431
00:23:08,053 --> 00:23:10,419
- Oh, shit.
- What the fuck are you wearing?
432
00:23:10,589 --> 00:23:13,114
My God.
Nice.
433
00:23:14,326 --> 00:23:17,853
- You're gonna get laid, dude.
- Ladies love a guy with class.
434
00:23:18,029 --> 00:23:20,293
Are you retarded?
435
00:23:21,266 --> 00:23:24,394
Jesus Christ, man.
Where do you even get shit like that?
436
00:23:24,569 --> 00:23:27,129
- Men's Wearhouse.
- Men's Wearhouse? Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.
437
00:23:29,007 --> 00:23:30,440
What is it?
438
00:23:30,609 --> 00:23:34,045
Wow, dude, this is fucking...
I can't believe it fucking worked.
439
00:23:34,212 --> 00:23:36,442
What did I say?
Don't doubt the master, bitches!
440
00:23:50,061 --> 00:23:51,688
Dude, we done good.
441
00:23:51,863 --> 00:23:53,694
Jesus, all those chicks are really hot.
442
00:23:53,865 --> 00:23:55,856
They're coming in packs.
This is insane.
443
00:23:57,235 --> 00:24:00,204
Beat it, I bet she let me
She been fiendin'since she met me
444
00:24:00,372 --> 00:24:03,068
I'm the coolest shit
Especially when I throw on all my Gretzky
445
00:24:03,241 --> 00:24:05,937
Got my Smith and Wessie to protect me
So respect me
446
00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:10,009
What up, baby girl?
447
00:24:10,215 --> 00:24:12,149
Andretti on Pirelli
Make a movie out the getty
448
00:24:12,317 --> 00:24:14,842
Where my ring and my confetti?
I'm Kobe Bryant ready
449
00:24:15,020 --> 00:24:16,647
Pink rosé and chronic smelly
450
00:24:16,855 --> 00:24:18,982
Dude, this is way more than 50 people.
451
00:24:19,157 --> 00:24:20,681
Of course it is, it's plus-one.
452
00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:25,052
That's fucking Alexis, dude.
She came, man.
453
00:24:25,230 --> 00:24:27,391
Damn, dude.
Whoa.
454
00:24:28,133 --> 00:24:31,102
Thomas, this is your party,
and she's the hottest girl here.
455
00:24:31,269 --> 00:24:34,261
- That better be yours tonight.
- Damn.
456
00:25:53,652 --> 00:25:56,746
White trash party
Pull a fifth of Bacardi from out of my underwear
457
00:25:56,922 --> 00:25:58,549
And walk around the party without a care
458
00:25:58,723 --> 00:26:01,658
- Where the fuck is your drink, Thomas?
- I'm between beverages.
459
00:26:01,826 --> 00:26:05,091
What the fuck does that even mean?
J.B., get this bitch a drink.
460
00:26:05,263 --> 00:26:06,753
Yeah, all right.
461
00:26:08,033 --> 00:26:10,900
Everybody in the club gettin' tipsy
462
00:26:11,670 --> 00:26:13,297
Who's that dude with the mustache?
463
00:26:13,471 --> 00:26:15,905
Oh, that's LaRosa. He graduated.
464
00:26:16,074 --> 00:26:18,474
When, in 1986?
465
00:26:18,643 --> 00:26:21,111
Hey, will you at least try
and have a good time?
466
00:26:21,279 --> 00:26:22,974
Whoo!
467
00:26:23,248 --> 00:26:24,715
Got it? You tie it?
468
00:26:24,883 --> 00:26:27,647
He's good. Ready to go.
Blast off.
469
00:26:32,123 --> 00:26:34,648
Pennies up at skinnies
Man, I do this for them bunnies
470
00:26:34,826 --> 00:26:36,623
That is not fucking cool.
471
00:26:36,795 --> 00:26:38,422
Oh, my God, it's a flying dog!
472
00:26:38,597 --> 00:26:40,895
'Cause, homey
That hood is tighter than Kenny's
473
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:44,197
It's just like Up.
474
00:26:44,369 --> 00:26:46,530
It's my fucking dog.
475
00:26:46,705 --> 00:26:48,002
I gotta record this.
476
00:26:48,173 --> 00:26:49,868
Are you serious right now?
477
00:26:50,041 --> 00:26:53,010
- Fuck this, I'm putting him inside.
- Let me help you.
478
00:26:54,312 --> 00:26:55,711
Hey.
479
00:26:58,583 --> 00:27:01,609
Can you imagine
if your mom ever saw that?
480
00:27:02,020 --> 00:27:03,282
It's my fucking dog.
481
00:27:03,455 --> 00:27:04,945
Poor Milo.
482
00:27:06,358 --> 00:27:08,792
I don't know. It's pretty funny.
483
00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:12,293
- Maybe I'll post it on YouTube.
- No, don't, don't, don't.
484
00:27:12,464 --> 00:27:13,761
Seriously, stop. Stop.
485
00:27:13,932 --> 00:27:17,129
Come on, you're way too easy. I love it.
486
00:27:17,302 --> 00:27:18,769
I hate you.
487
00:27:20,205 --> 00:27:23,003
You'll be okay, Milo. I promise.
488
00:27:27,412 --> 00:27:31,746
All right, well, um,
we better get back out there.
489
00:27:33,918 --> 00:27:35,681
Hey, yo, Kub. Hey, yo, what up, dog?
490
00:27:35,854 --> 00:27:37,378
Yo, what's up, bro?
491
00:27:37,555 --> 00:27:40,820
Let me see what you got
Now shake that thing
492
00:27:40,992 --> 00:27:43,017
- Hey, man, what's up?
- Nice party, man.
493
00:27:43,194 --> 00:27:45,992
Hey, thanks. Would you guys mind
getting off my dad's car?
494
00:27:46,164 --> 00:27:48,530
It's just he'll go crazy
if anything happens to it.
495
00:27:48,700 --> 00:27:50,065
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
- All right.
496
00:27:50,235 --> 00:27:52,567
- Thanks, man, I appreciate it.
- Yeah, no problem.
497
00:27:52,737 --> 00:27:55,001
Thomas! You're taking a bullet
from me right now.
498
00:27:55,173 --> 00:27:57,403
- What is that?
- Tequila. Just fucking take it.
499
00:27:57,575 --> 00:27:59,440
- All right. Fuck, dude.
- Come here. Come on.
500
00:27:59,611 --> 00:28:02,136
Ladies, who wants to take a shot
with the birthday boy?
501
00:28:02,313 --> 00:28:04,372
- Hell, yeah.
- Whoa, uh... Oh.
502
00:28:04,549 --> 00:28:06,779
Careful.
She's a professional. Open up.
503
00:28:06,951 --> 00:28:09,317
Take it. Oh, my God,
she's got a deep throat.
504
00:28:09,487 --> 00:28:13,548
- Okay, open up, open up. Now.
- Yeah!
505
00:28:14,559 --> 00:28:16,857
Say what
Bitch, I'm about to blow up
506
00:28:18,363 --> 00:28:21,093
Pardon? Oh, hey.
Hey.
507
00:28:21,599 --> 00:28:24,033
- What's up, guys?
- Well, we did it.
508
00:28:24,202 --> 00:28:26,966
This is amazing. How did we get
all these people to show up?
509
00:28:27,138 --> 00:28:30,369
Check it out, guys.
I'm pretty sure it's that girl from Playboy.
510
00:28:30,542 --> 00:28:31,975
Who?
Oh, my God, it is her.
511
00:28:32,143 --> 00:28:35,340
She graduated three years ago.
She's in Playboy's Pac-10 issue.
512
00:28:35,513 --> 00:28:37,845
- Dibs.
- Yeah, like that's gonna happen.
513
00:28:38,016 --> 00:28:39,745
Well, I want to declare it, just in case.
514
00:28:41,352 --> 00:28:43,217
- Whoa.
- Oh, shit.
515
00:28:44,889 --> 00:28:46,083
We're fucked!
516
00:28:46,257 --> 00:28:47,884
What? Oh, hey, what's going on?
517
00:28:48,059 --> 00:28:50,823
- There's people in the house!
- Oh, shit.
518
00:28:50,995 --> 00:28:52,428
- Hey, Costa.
- I'm understaffed.
519
00:28:52,597 --> 00:28:55,259
- Come on, I need your fucking help, man.
- Goddamn it.
520
00:28:55,433 --> 00:28:57,458
Wow. Whoa.
521
00:28:59,304 --> 00:29:02,899
Hey. Hey, hi. Hi. Welcome.
Welcome to party. Welcome, welcome.
522
00:29:03,074 --> 00:29:04,098
- Yo!
- Miles!
523
00:29:04,275 --> 00:29:06,266
Little dude. What's up, man?
How we doing?
524
00:29:06,444 --> 00:29:08,503
- That's Ashley, Rachel, Sarah.
- Hi, hi.
525
00:29:08,680 --> 00:29:11,945
I brought all these people to your party.
Fucking camera creeps me out.
526
00:29:12,117 --> 00:29:14,608
- Yeah, it's... Don't worry.
- Let's go.
527
00:29:14,786 --> 00:29:17,346
I'm talking about the fucking people
in the house.
528
00:29:17,522 --> 00:29:20,821
My parents are gonna crucify me
if anything gets fucked up.
529
00:29:20,992 --> 00:29:25,258
I don't care if everyone thinks I'm a dick.
I'm getting them out of the house. Now.
530
00:29:25,430 --> 00:29:27,625
Fuck, hey, stop, seriously.
531
00:29:28,266 --> 00:29:30,393
Dude, what the fuck are you doing?
532
00:29:31,102 --> 00:29:33,570
- Please don't embarrass me like this.
- Hey, listen up!
533
00:29:33,738 --> 00:29:35,399
Yeah, Thomas! Whoo!
534
00:29:38,877 --> 00:29:43,177
Yeah, bro! Birthday boy on the table!
That's what I like to see, baby.
535
00:29:43,348 --> 00:29:44,747
- You having a good time?
- Yeah.
536
00:29:44,916 --> 00:29:49,250
Come on, guys, let's start making
some drinks. Let's get crazy in this bitch.
537
00:29:56,161 --> 00:29:57,822
Can I help you, sir?
538
00:29:57,996 --> 00:30:00,464
- I'm here to see Thomas.
- First and last name, please.
539
00:30:00,632 --> 00:30:02,623
I'm Rob, the neighbor.
Who the fuck are you?
540
00:30:02,801 --> 00:30:05,861
- I'll ask the questions, sir.
- Exactly. Get the hell out of my way.
541
00:30:16,214 --> 00:30:18,205
- Rob, hey. What can I do for you, man?
- Hey.
542
00:30:18,383 --> 00:30:21,045
Look, man, I don't mean to be
a dick here or anything.
543
00:30:21,219 --> 00:30:24,677
Oliver came over earlier and told me
you guys were having a little party...
544
00:30:24,856 --> 00:30:26,118
...but this is too much.
545
00:30:26,291 --> 00:30:29,749
Yeah, we actually should be winding down,
like midnight, I mean, maybe 1.
546
00:30:29,928 --> 00:30:31,225
- Is that okay?
- No, it's not.
547
00:30:31,396 --> 00:30:33,728
The baby can't sleep,
Melinda works early tomorrow.
548
00:30:33,898 --> 00:30:36,765
Fuck, yeah!
My boy Rob is here to rage! Mwah!
549
00:30:36,935 --> 00:30:39,130
- Good to see you.
- Actually, I'm not raging.
550
00:30:39,304 --> 00:30:41,363
I'm telling Thomas
it's time to shut it down.
551
00:30:41,539 --> 00:30:43,530
You can't be serious.
This is a great party.
552
00:30:43,708 --> 00:30:46,768
I am serious, because it's 11:30 at night.
It's time to wrap it up.
553
00:30:46,945 --> 00:30:48,776
Hey, hey, hey.
554
00:30:48,947 --> 00:30:51,609
Why don't we bring everyone to the back,
lower the volume?
555
00:30:51,783 --> 00:30:54,115
Guys, this isn't a request.
The party's over.
556
00:30:54,285 --> 00:30:57,516
I guess we're just gonna have to
agree to disagree, then, aren't we?
557
00:30:57,689 --> 00:31:00,624
Listen to me, Thomas.
Either shut it down or I'm calling the cops.
558
00:31:00,792 --> 00:31:02,350
Ahh.
559
00:31:02,527 --> 00:31:04,757
Fine. Fuck it.
I'm calling the fucking cops... Aah!
560
00:31:04,929 --> 00:31:06,794
Fuck!
Oh, shit!
561
00:31:06,965 --> 00:31:09,593
Jesus fucking Christ!
What'd you do that for?
562
00:31:09,767 --> 00:31:12,600
Are you kidding me?
I will fucking kill you!
563
00:31:12,770 --> 00:31:15,637
The little fuck Tased me!
I'm definitely calling the cops now!
564
00:31:15,807 --> 00:31:18,503
You punched a kid in the face!
I'm calling the cops on you.
565
00:31:18,676 --> 00:31:22,009
Do it, genius. It's all on tape.
I just saw this motherfucker record it.
566
00:31:22,180 --> 00:31:24,705
All I got was you punching
that little child's face.
567
00:31:24,883 --> 00:31:26,180
Fuck you.
568
00:31:26,351 --> 00:31:27,613
Go home, Robert!
569
00:31:27,785 --> 00:31:29,844
It was just a kid, man!
570
00:31:31,489 --> 00:31:33,582
- Are you all right, man?
- Is he okay?
571
00:31:33,758 --> 00:31:35,225
You're a fucking champion.
572
00:31:35,393 --> 00:31:38,624
He sucker-punched you.
You'd own that bitch in a real fight.
573
00:31:38,796 --> 00:31:39,990
- You think so?
- I know so.
574
00:31:40,164 --> 00:31:42,155
Fuck that asshole. You're killing it, bro.
575
00:31:42,333 --> 00:31:44,893
- Yo, Costa, what's up?
- Yo, go in the back.
576
00:31:45,069 --> 00:31:48,835
I need you to dial back like 10, 15 percent.
You can't hard-charge all the time.
577
00:31:49,007 --> 00:31:51,066
All right? And lose the Taser, okay?
578
00:31:51,242 --> 00:31:53,472
- Got it.
- Get down here.
579
00:31:53,645 --> 00:31:55,875
We need a post
up at the cockbiter's house.
580
00:31:56,047 --> 00:31:59,574
If he calls the cops,
I want you to radio it over to me, okay?
581
00:32:02,487 --> 00:32:04,512
Get out of here. Go.
582
00:32:12,397 --> 00:32:15,730
Alexis was eye-fucking you,
and you got college girls on your dick.
583
00:32:15,900 --> 00:32:17,663
- You're golden!
- Dude, I'm so fucked.
584
00:32:17,835 --> 00:32:20,929
- Relax, man, everything's going great.
- Shit.
585
00:32:21,105 --> 00:32:24,097
Are you fucking kidding me?
Didn't I tell you two to fuck off?
586
00:32:24,275 --> 00:32:26,971
- Get down here now.
- Come on, there's like 200 people here.
587
00:32:27,145 --> 00:32:29,636
I don't care.
T, get these freshmen out of here.
588
00:32:29,814 --> 00:32:32,510
This is a party for grownups.
Let's fucking go.
589
00:32:32,684 --> 00:32:34,811
Makes no sense.
This kid's younger than we are.
590
00:32:34,986 --> 00:32:37,454
- How the hell did they get up there?
- Move it, fellas.
591
00:32:37,622 --> 00:32:40,386
- You too, get out of here.
- That's my boy. That's my boy.
592
00:32:40,558 --> 00:32:42,958
See, the kid's a pro.
We got nothing to worry about.
593
00:32:43,127 --> 00:32:45,618
Dude, you heard Rob, man.
What if he calls the cops?
594
00:32:45,797 --> 00:32:48,857
The guy isn't gonna do shit.
He punched a 12-year-old in the face.
595
00:32:49,033 --> 00:32:52,764
Thomas, everything's under control.
Let's just have some fun.
596
00:32:52,937 --> 00:32:55,030
I got this, okay?
597
00:32:58,409 --> 00:33:00,536
Cannonball, bitches!
598
00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:12,617
I don't care for fancy things
599
00:33:12,790 --> 00:33:16,749
Or to take part in the vicious race
600
00:33:17,328 --> 00:33:19,387
This is the Thomas Kub pool cam.
601
00:33:19,564 --> 00:33:21,498
Dude, check it out. Check it out.
602
00:33:21,833 --> 00:33:23,892
Whoa, whoa, whoa, read the sign, honey.
603
00:33:24,068 --> 00:33:26,696
Sorry, I don't make the rules.
604
00:33:26,871 --> 00:33:28,930
Ray-Ban vision, these ain't no prescription
605
00:33:30,541 --> 00:33:32,532
No fucking way.
606
00:33:32,710 --> 00:33:34,007
Dude, go over there.
607
00:33:34,178 --> 00:33:36,112
Do you fucking believe this?
608
00:33:43,021 --> 00:33:47,958
In this, feelin' tremendous
Lenses darker than the tint on my Benzes
609
00:33:48,126 --> 00:33:49,388
Yeah! Ha, ha!
610
00:33:58,903 --> 00:33:59,961
Whoo-hoo!
611
00:34:04,909 --> 00:34:07,400
- Oh, my God!
- Holy shit! Fucking insane!
612
00:34:12,617 --> 00:34:15,848
Oh, my God.
Dude, that sign fucking worked.
613
00:34:16,020 --> 00:34:17,317
You gotta have faith, son.
614
00:34:17,488 --> 00:34:19,388
Would you like a glass of wine?
615
00:34:19,557 --> 00:34:23,186
We've got red, we've got white.
You know, Cabernet, Merlot.
616
00:34:23,361 --> 00:34:24,885
Just another beer would be great.
617
00:34:25,063 --> 00:34:26,530
Uh...
618
00:34:26,964 --> 00:34:28,363
Here we are.
619
00:34:31,836 --> 00:34:33,394
Whoa.
620
00:34:40,344 --> 00:34:43,142
Wow. Okay.
621
00:34:49,253 --> 00:34:50,515
J.B!
622
00:34:52,490 --> 00:34:55,618
How did this thing get up here?
Was someone in my parents' room?
623
00:34:55,793 --> 00:34:58,819
It's a gnome. I guess he gets around.
Who cares, man?
624
00:34:58,996 --> 00:35:00,987
Well, I just don't want people up here.
625
00:35:01,165 --> 00:35:03,133
Besides, it's creepy. Look at him.
626
00:35:04,869 --> 00:35:07,861
- J.B., what are you looking for?
- To see if your dad has condoms.
627
00:35:08,039 --> 00:35:09,199
I'm working on something.
628
00:35:09,373 --> 00:35:11,898
Only thing you're working on
is diabetes, you fat fuck.
629
00:35:12,076 --> 00:35:16,035
- Oh, dude, Alexis just texted me.
- What? What's it say?
630
00:35:16,214 --> 00:35:18,842
"Body shots for the birthday boy
right now"?
631
00:35:19,016 --> 00:35:21,814
- Dude, it's fucking on!
- Check it out.
632
00:35:21,986 --> 00:35:24,682
- J.B., seriously, what are you doing?
- Your dad is a freak.
633
00:35:24,856 --> 00:35:29,054
Stop. Give me that. Costa, stop, wait.
Costa, what are you doing?
634
00:35:29,227 --> 00:35:31,422
- Replying.
Don't. Here, don't send that.
635
00:35:31,596 --> 00:35:34,997
- Sent. Too late, man.
- What did you write?
636
00:35:35,733 --> 00:35:38,224
"I want your ass too, Mommy"?
637
00:35:38,402 --> 00:35:40,597
"I want your ass, Mommy"?
Who talks like that?
638
00:35:40,771 --> 00:35:42,762
I do. The shit works.
639
00:35:42,940 --> 00:35:45,807
Go. Go talk to her.
640
00:35:46,911 --> 00:35:47,935
Oh.
641
00:36:03,461 --> 00:36:06,430
Hey, hey, hey, hey
642
00:36:14,472 --> 00:36:18,272
Wait. No, wait. What are you doing?
Not like that. Not like that.
643
00:36:19,710 --> 00:36:21,405
Like this.
644
00:36:24,148 --> 00:36:25,877
Put this in your mouth.
645
00:36:52,343 --> 00:36:53,605
Your turn.
646
00:36:53,778 --> 00:36:56,269
Kub! House phone! House phone!
647
00:36:58,416 --> 00:37:00,850
Shit. Sorry. Um...
648
00:37:01,419 --> 00:37:05,685
Excuse me. Sorry. Look out.
Sorry. Sorry. Excuse me.
649
00:37:05,856 --> 00:37:08,120
Oh, shit. Sorry.
650
00:37:15,266 --> 00:37:17,427
Dax, close that behind you.
651
00:37:17,602 --> 00:37:19,365
Shit! Dax, find the phone.
652
00:37:21,272 --> 00:37:23,638
Um, right, you know what?
Fuck it, just be quiet.
653
00:37:24,242 --> 00:37:26,267
- Hello.
Thomas. Are you there?
654
00:37:26,444 --> 00:37:27,911
- Dad, hey.
- Where have you been?
655
00:37:28,079 --> 00:37:29,842
We've been trying your cell all night.
656
00:37:30,014 --> 00:37:33,916
- We agreed all my calls would be answered.
- I know. Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
657
00:37:34,085 --> 00:37:36,553
We were out in the hot tub,
so I didn't have it on me.
658
00:37:36,721 --> 00:37:38,985
I don't want to find wet towels
when we get home.
659
00:37:39,156 --> 00:37:42,023
- I want to come home to a clean house.
- Of course, definitely.
660
00:37:42,193 --> 00:37:45,219
- We were just calling... What was that?
- Dude, look at her.
661
00:37:45,396 --> 00:37:47,364
What was that? Thomas?
662
00:37:47,531 --> 00:37:50,591
Nothing. That was Costa.
You're on speakerphone.
663
00:37:50,768 --> 00:37:53,566
We just wanted to call one last time
before going to bed...
664
00:37:53,738 --> 00:37:56,366
...make sure you're all set for the night.
665
00:37:56,540 --> 00:37:58,667
Yep, all good.
666
00:37:58,843 --> 00:38:02,301
I'm actually about to
go to sleep right now, so...
667
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:05,244
Great. Well, we'll see you Sunday.
Happy birthday, Thomas.
668
00:38:05,416 --> 00:38:07,976
- Thanks, Dad. Good night.
- Good night.
669
00:38:16,294 --> 00:38:17,693
Holy shit.
670
00:38:24,835 --> 00:38:26,393
Fuck, yeah!
671
00:38:26,570 --> 00:38:28,299
Oh, shit, I think that's his dad.
672
00:38:28,472 --> 00:38:31,703
What? I'm not here to bust anybody.
I'm just here to party.
673
00:38:31,876 --> 00:38:33,537
- Ew!
- Come on, "Ew. "
674
00:38:33,711 --> 00:38:35,201
Give me a break. You got a ball?
675
00:38:35,379 --> 00:38:37,176
- Yeah, man.
- Let's do this.
676
00:38:37,348 --> 00:38:40,317
Here we go. Paxson for three.
677
00:38:40,484 --> 00:38:42,008
Whoa, ho, ho, ho!
678
00:38:42,186 --> 00:38:46,213
Up high!
Come on, dude, right here. Yeah!
679
00:38:46,390 --> 00:38:48,415
Let me have that.
680
00:38:56,334 --> 00:38:57,358
Hey
681
00:38:59,070 --> 00:39:00,503
Nasty, kid
682
00:39:01,205 --> 00:39:02,399
Hey
683
00:39:02,573 --> 00:39:06,168
What's that, dude? Hold on,
I can't fucking hear a thing you're saying.
684
00:39:07,445 --> 00:39:09,106
Speak up, E.
685
00:39:09,280 --> 00:39:12,875
What? E...
What the fuck are you doing here?
686
00:39:13,050 --> 00:39:16,110
- What you gonna do about it, bitch?
- You're not invited, dickhead.
687
00:39:18,856 --> 00:39:20,551
Fucking asshole.
688
00:39:23,561 --> 00:39:24,585
Bro, what's happening?
689
00:39:24,762 --> 00:39:27,822
Subject is arguing with
an overweight woman, most likely his wife.
690
00:39:27,998 --> 00:39:30,933
She wants him to call the police.
He wants to handle it himself.
691
00:39:31,102 --> 00:39:33,229
He's drinking. They're in the kitchen.
692
00:39:33,404 --> 00:39:35,770
I'm upstairs. Kids are asleep. Over.
693
00:39:35,940 --> 00:39:37,339
Wait, you're in their house?
694
00:39:39,243 --> 00:39:41,939
Are you fucking kidding me?
E, get the fuck out now!
695
00:39:43,114 --> 00:39:45,309
Negative. I'm a ghost. Out.
696
00:39:45,716 --> 00:39:48,344
What the fuck am I gonna do with this kid?
697
00:39:48,519 --> 00:39:49,952
E! E!
698
00:40:19,717 --> 00:40:22,413
Are you having fun?
Yeah, I'm having a good time.
699
00:40:22,586 --> 00:40:24,520
It's pretty fucking crazy.
700
00:40:27,291 --> 00:40:29,350
Oh, my God.
701
00:40:29,527 --> 00:40:31,893
What was wrong with me?
702
00:40:32,062 --> 00:40:34,997
Wow, this was before Costa.
703
00:40:35,166 --> 00:40:37,634
Yeah, the good old days.
704
00:40:37,802 --> 00:40:40,430
Yeah, back when you were
still in the crew, right?
705
00:40:42,106 --> 00:40:43,937
You used to be so cute. What happened?
706
00:40:44,108 --> 00:40:45,336
Shut the fuck up.
707
00:40:45,943 --> 00:40:47,501
Still looks like me.
708
00:40:53,751 --> 00:40:56,845
Was that weird? I'm sorry.
Shit, that was weird, wasn't it?
709
00:40:57,021 --> 00:40:59,888
- No, it... It was a little weird. Heh.
- Fuck. Um...
710
00:41:05,463 --> 00:41:07,397
Cops on the way.
Get out, everybody! Now!
711
00:41:07,565 --> 00:41:10,056
Everybody in the back!
Get in the back now!
712
00:41:10,234 --> 00:41:13,829
What, are you over there? Get in the back!
Cops are coming! Hurry, let's move!
713
00:41:14,004 --> 00:41:18,100
Move it, move it! Let's go! Hurry up!
Cops are coming! Everybody in the back!
714
00:41:18,275 --> 00:41:20,869
Costa. Hey, Costa.
715
00:41:21,045 --> 00:41:22,478
Everybody get in the back!
716
00:41:22,646 --> 00:41:23,908
Hey, what's going on?
717
00:41:24,081 --> 00:41:27,414
The cops are on their way right now!
Oh, shit.
718
00:41:27,585 --> 00:41:32,113
Get in the back now!
Everybody move! Let's go!
719
00:41:33,390 --> 00:41:35,654
Keep going! Get in the back now!
720
00:41:36,126 --> 00:41:38,117
Get out, police.
They're on their way now.
721
00:41:38,295 --> 00:41:40,820
How do you know that?
Don't ask. My boy's in deep.
722
00:41:40,998 --> 00:41:43,296
Gotta clear this fucking beer out of here.
723
00:41:43,467 --> 00:41:45,264
Damn it.
724
00:41:46,070 --> 00:41:48,971
- Is that everything?
- Yeah. I got your chalice.
725
00:42:11,127 --> 00:42:13,061
Law enforcement currently on scene.
726
00:42:13,229 --> 00:42:16,096
Standing down, for now.
727
00:42:23,806 --> 00:42:27,367
- I don't hear anything.
- No, it doesn't sound like a party.
728
00:42:28,477 --> 00:42:31,275
Not a party that's still going, anyway.
729
00:42:39,989 --> 00:42:41,616
Here they come.
730
00:42:41,791 --> 00:42:44,225
- Evening, officers.
- Fellas having a party?
731
00:42:44,393 --> 00:42:47,521
Yeah, we're having a small little
birthday gathering for my friend.
732
00:42:47,696 --> 00:42:50,324
I'm the friend, my birthday.
733
00:42:50,499 --> 00:42:52,433
Lot of cars for a small party.
734
00:42:52,601 --> 00:42:55,593
Shh.
735
00:42:56,906 --> 00:42:58,874
Shh.
736
00:43:04,447 --> 00:43:06,278
The house? Whose is it?
737
00:43:06,449 --> 00:43:08,212
Is there a problem here, officers?
738
00:43:08,384 --> 00:43:10,318
We have a noise complaint.
739
00:43:10,486 --> 00:43:13,216
- You mind if we look around?
- I'd prefer if you didn't.
740
00:43:13,389 --> 00:43:16,222
- We're not asking.
- Excuse me, I'm not a lawyer or anything.
741
00:43:16,392 --> 00:43:18,485
Doesn't the law state that
you cannot enter...
742
00:43:18,661 --> 00:43:20,925
...through a private residence
without permission?
743
00:43:22,198 --> 00:43:24,462
Is there an adult here
we might speak with?
744
00:43:24,633 --> 00:43:27,397
You're speaking with one.
I'm 18 and a half years old, sir.
745
00:43:27,570 --> 00:43:31,165
And, of course, in my culture
I've been a man since my 13th birthday.
746
00:43:31,340 --> 00:43:33,706
So you're telling us we cannot come in?
747
00:43:33,876 --> 00:43:36,538
With all due respect,
technically the law says you cannot.
748
00:43:36,712 --> 00:43:38,771
But what we're saying is, you may not.
749
00:43:38,948 --> 00:43:42,611
I guess both are true. The law says
you cannot because we say you may not.
750
00:43:42,785 --> 00:43:46,448
All right, all right. Props on
the "can/may" bullshit. Very good.
751
00:43:46,622 --> 00:43:48,055
No doubt. Thank you, sir.
752
00:43:48,224 --> 00:43:51,489
Just keep the noise down
to a minimum, okay?
753
00:43:51,660 --> 00:43:53,184
Yes, sir. Of course.
754
00:43:53,696 --> 00:43:56,392
Don't make us come back.
You know what I mean?
755
00:43:56,565 --> 00:43:59,125
- Yeah.
- Uh-huh. Of course.
756
00:43:59,301 --> 00:44:00,393
- Good night.
- Officers.
757
00:44:00,569 --> 00:44:01,934
Night.
758
00:44:02,805 --> 00:44:06,866
"Technically the law states... "
Damn Internet.
759
00:44:07,276 --> 00:44:09,676
Everybody's a fucking attorney.
760
00:44:22,558 --> 00:44:25,550
- Fuck you.
- Dude, Costa. Seriously?
761
00:44:25,728 --> 00:44:26,820
- Fuck you.
- Come inside.
762
00:44:26,996 --> 00:44:29,556
Just come inside. Just forget about it.
763
00:44:40,943 --> 00:44:43,241
To the break of dawn, yo!
764
00:45:52,848 --> 00:45:55,180
Holy shit!
What the fuck are you doing?
765
00:45:57,186 --> 00:46:01,122
Thomas, my cousin can replace the window,
no problem. It's all good, man. I promise.
766
00:46:14,036 --> 00:46:17,631
- Where did you get this? It's my mom's.
- Come on, bro. I'm not gonna break it.
767
00:46:27,716 --> 00:46:29,684
Throw it in here, nice and low.
768
00:46:42,931 --> 00:46:44,023
They're pills!
769
00:46:44,199 --> 00:46:45,860
It's Ecstasy, bro!
770
00:46:58,447 --> 00:47:00,176
You heard about this on Craigslist?
771
00:47:00,349 --> 00:47:03,216
Craigslist, yeah. It's on the thing,
on the page, right there.
772
00:47:03,385 --> 00:47:05,615
Whoa, we are so fucked.
773
00:47:05,788 --> 00:47:08,052
Relax, man.
We need to tell Thomas.
774
00:47:08,223 --> 00:47:10,987
T- Rick's so burned out,
he probably forgot about it already.
775
00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:12,320
This is bad.
776
00:47:13,295 --> 00:47:16,526
Mom, Dad, it's me, Thomas.
777
00:47:16,699 --> 00:47:17,893
Um...
778
00:47:18,067 --> 00:47:20,661
I'm drunk. I mean, that's not an excuse.
779
00:47:20,836 --> 00:47:25,933
Hopefully we'll meet again,
so I can explain things.
780
00:47:26,608 --> 00:47:28,337
I don't really have an explanation...
781
00:47:28,510 --> 00:47:31,206
...other than fucking Costa
made me do it. So...
782
00:47:33,115 --> 00:47:34,776
- Fuck off!
- Dude, it's us.
783
00:47:34,950 --> 00:47:36,247
I know.
784
00:47:38,053 --> 00:47:40,521
What are you doing in here?
The whole party's outside.
785
00:47:40,689 --> 00:47:42,213
Have you seen my fucking house?
786
00:47:42,391 --> 00:47:44,951
We have a whole day
to fix this place up. It's all good.
787
00:47:45,127 --> 00:47:49,962
No, it's not all good, okay? I mean,
what about this? What if my parents see it?
788
00:47:50,132 --> 00:47:52,896
Nobody's gonna see this shit but us.
I promise.
789
00:47:54,803 --> 00:47:56,862
Where did all these people
even come from?
790
00:47:57,039 --> 00:47:58,700
You know a guy down there told me...
791
00:47:58,874 --> 00:48:01,866
...he found out about the party
on fucking Craigslist?
792
00:48:02,845 --> 00:48:05,143
My dad met my stepmom on Craigslist.
793
00:48:05,314 --> 00:48:07,475
So you put my address
on the fucking Internet?
794
00:48:07,649 --> 00:48:10,345
- Well, not just the Internet.
- Shut the fuck up, J. B!
795
00:48:10,519 --> 00:48:12,384
Wait, what the fuck is he talking about?
796
00:48:12,554 --> 00:48:16,581
I had Jesse Marco put out an e-mail blast
and I may have called a radio station or two.
797
00:48:16,759 --> 00:48:18,056
You motherfuckers!
798
00:48:18,227 --> 00:48:20,491
You were so nervous
about people not showing up.
799
00:48:20,662 --> 00:48:23,893
Dude, people are spilling shit,
breaking shit, probably stealing shit.
800
00:48:24,066 --> 00:48:25,727
It's out of control.
801
00:48:25,901 --> 00:48:28,961
I wasn't nervous. I wanted the party
to be big enough to be cool.
802
00:48:29,138 --> 00:48:32,505
- Dude, look, back in Queens...
- I'm fucking sick of hearing about Queens.
803
00:48:32,674 --> 00:48:35,336
We get it. Queens is awesome.
We're pussies. I don't fucking care.
804
00:48:35,511 --> 00:48:37,103
I'm doin'me
805
00:48:37,279 --> 00:48:41,113
I'm livin'life right now, man
And this what I'm gonna do
806
00:48:41,650 --> 00:48:43,550
Whatever happens, we can make this right.
807
00:48:43,719 --> 00:48:46,916
I'll fix this whole house myself if I have to.
808
00:48:47,089 --> 00:48:50,581
Your parents don't even come home
till Sunday. You just need to relax, man.
809
00:48:50,759 --> 00:48:53,785
- You want a massage, bro?
- No, no. Just, stop.
810
00:48:53,962 --> 00:48:55,930
This is my favorite song, guys.
811
00:48:56,098 --> 00:48:57,998
But my body
812
00:48:58,167 --> 00:48:59,896
My body's
813
00:49:00,068 --> 00:49:02,798
I can't believe, like,
you guys just did this to me.
814
00:49:02,971 --> 00:49:04,836
We did this for you.
815
00:49:05,974 --> 00:49:09,535
Look, man, I know you're not a drug guy,
and I respect that about you.
816
00:49:09,711 --> 00:49:12,179
- But right now, this is what you need.
- What is it?
817
00:49:12,347 --> 00:49:15,874
It's Ecstasy. It'll put the brakes
on your little freak-out. Just take it.
818
00:49:18,420 --> 00:49:21,355
All right. This won't totally,
like, fuck me up, will it?
819
00:49:21,523 --> 00:49:24,788
Of course it will, dude.
That's the whole point.
820
00:49:26,328 --> 00:49:27,625
Here.
821
00:49:28,730 --> 00:49:31,290
- Hey.
- You get half of one.
822
00:49:32,534 --> 00:49:35,059
Baby
823
00:49:35,270 --> 00:49:37,238
All right, just give me like 10 minutes.
824
00:49:38,607 --> 00:49:40,404
No fucking way, man!
825
00:49:40,809 --> 00:49:43,039
Ow! Get off me.
This is your night.
826
00:49:43,212 --> 00:49:47,581
Cut the music. Cut it.
How's everybody doing? It's your host, Costa.
827
00:49:47,749 --> 00:49:50,582
I'm gonna bring up my best friends,
Thomas and J.B.
828
00:49:50,752 --> 00:49:52,379
Get your asses up here right now.
829
00:49:52,554 --> 00:49:54,283
Come on, move your asses.
830
00:49:54,823 --> 00:49:56,552
Come on, J.B., move your fat ass.
831
00:49:56,725 --> 00:50:00,593
The reason you guys are here tonight
is because it's Thomas Kub's birthday.
832
00:50:00,762 --> 00:50:04,823
And we're gonna sing a little
"Happy Birthday" for him. One, two, three.
833
00:50:05,234 --> 00:50:09,694
Happy birthday to you
834
00:50:09,872 --> 00:50:14,571
Happy birthday to you
835
00:50:14,743 --> 00:50:20,045
Happy birthday dear Thomas
836
00:50:20,749 --> 00:50:24,446
Happy birthday to you
837
00:50:26,822 --> 00:50:29,689
Thanks, everybody, for coming.
Let's get the music rocking!
838
00:50:29,858 --> 00:50:31,883
Let's fucking lose it
839
00:50:32,060 --> 00:50:34,255
Get out of your mind
840
00:50:34,429 --> 00:50:36,659
Get out of your mind
841
00:50:36,832 --> 00:50:39,665
Get out of your mind
Fuck that shit
842
00:50:39,835 --> 00:50:43,635
Fuck, yeah! What's up in this bitch?
Fuckers.
843
00:50:43,805 --> 00:50:46,273
Hey, baby, what's up?
Want some of this?
844
00:50:46,441 --> 00:50:49,501
Yeah!
The fuck you guys looking at?
845
00:50:50,279 --> 00:50:52,270
Whoa!
846
00:50:52,447 --> 00:50:54,881
- You got something to say?
- Buddy, what...? What the...
847
00:51:01,056 --> 00:51:03,616
Let me go! Goddamn it!
848
00:51:04,026 --> 00:51:05,653
Don't shut that...
849
00:51:05,827 --> 00:51:08,625
Scuffin'shell-toes
Is that nigga dead?
850
00:51:08,797 --> 00:51:10,856
Hey, have you seen Thomas?
851
00:51:11,033 --> 00:51:12,694
We're looking for him.
852
00:51:12,868 --> 00:51:16,099
Well, when you find him, can you tell him
I've got something for him?
853
00:51:16,838 --> 00:51:18,066
Jump in.
854
00:51:18,240 --> 00:51:20,538
You're breaking the rules, you know.
855
00:51:22,544 --> 00:51:24,171
Ew. Heh.
856
00:51:24,346 --> 00:51:26,712
Why won't you get in with me?
857
00:51:26,882 --> 00:51:30,443
It's just, like, I already went
swimming once against my will.
858
00:51:30,986 --> 00:51:32,647
Wetness.
859
00:51:33,055 --> 00:51:35,114
Ha, ha. Whoa.
860
00:51:35,290 --> 00:51:37,224
So, Thomas, are you having fun?
861
00:51:38,393 --> 00:51:39,587
- No.
- Not at all?
862
00:51:39,761 --> 00:51:42,423
- Yes.
- You look pretty fucked up.
863
00:51:42,598 --> 00:51:45,089
- I'm a little fucked up.
- But you look good.
864
00:51:45,267 --> 00:51:47,997
- Have you gotten lucky at all?
- I'm pretty lucky right now.
865
00:51:48,170 --> 00:51:49,501
Slow down, dude.
866
00:51:49,671 --> 00:51:51,536
Fine. Give me that.
867
00:51:51,707 --> 00:51:54,039
- Are you having fun at this party?
- So much fun.
868
00:51:54,209 --> 00:51:57,838
It's just that it's a small get-together.
It should be basically chill.
869
00:51:58,013 --> 00:52:01,210
Look how chill this is.
It's no big deal. I mean, there's two DJ's.
870
00:52:01,383 --> 00:52:04,511
That's not a big deal, right?
When do your parents get home?
871
00:52:04,686 --> 00:52:06,677
- I don't know.
- J.B., get your fat ass up!
872
00:52:06,855 --> 00:52:10,052
There's a midget in the oven.
Let's go. Come on.
873
00:52:10,225 --> 00:52:11,886
What?
What? What did he say?
874
00:52:12,060 --> 00:52:13,322
I heard, "midget in oven. "
875
00:52:16,798 --> 00:52:19,596
Move the fuck out of the way!
876
00:52:19,768 --> 00:52:21,201
Move the fuck out of the way!
877
00:52:21,370 --> 00:52:24,339
- I'm so sorry, sir. I'm so sor...
- Fuck!
878
00:52:24,506 --> 00:52:26,303
Hey, wrong guy. Wrong guy.
879
00:52:26,475 --> 00:52:29,535
- My God. Jesus Christ.
- No.
880
00:52:29,711 --> 00:52:35,877
Motherfucker! Motherfuckers!
You fucking cunt!
881
00:52:40,589 --> 00:52:42,454
Yo, yo, yo, hey!
882
00:52:42,624 --> 00:52:46,754
I just heard a rumor that all your balls
got attacked by a midget. Is it true?
883
00:52:46,928 --> 00:52:49,988
Please, please, just tell me it is.
I'm praying it fucking is.
884
00:52:50,165 --> 00:52:52,725
Dude, I can't believe I missed it.
885
00:52:54,336 --> 00:52:57,066
Look at your fucking pupils.
886
00:53:00,909 --> 00:53:02,774
- I love you guys.
- Ha, ha.
887
00:53:02,944 --> 00:53:04,343
No, seriously.
888
00:53:04,513 --> 00:53:07,277
Look, I realize I can be,
like, a huge dick sometimes...
889
00:53:07,449 --> 00:53:09,280
...and I'm really sorry for that.
890
00:53:09,451 --> 00:53:12,079
- It's okay.
- No, it's not.
891
00:53:13,355 --> 00:53:17,758
J.B., I'm sorry for buying you a bra
on your birthday. That wasn't cool.
892
00:53:17,926 --> 00:53:19,860
It wasn't cool, man.
893
00:53:20,028 --> 00:53:23,156
And I'm sorry for all the times
I called you Fat Fuck.
894
00:53:23,331 --> 00:53:24,821
Mm.
895
00:53:25,000 --> 00:53:27,628
- Chubby Bitch.
- Yeah.
896
00:53:27,803 --> 00:53:30,465
- Fudgy the Whale.
- Okay.
897
00:53:30,639 --> 00:53:33,199
I'm sorry for that time
at your brother's Bar Mitzvah...
898
00:53:33,375 --> 00:53:36,833
...where I told everyone you look like
Rosie O'Donnell, because you don't.
899
00:53:37,012 --> 00:53:39,071
- I don't.
- Hey, guys?
900
00:53:39,247 --> 00:53:40,942
- What?
- Um...
901
00:53:41,616 --> 00:53:43,743
I hooked up with Kirby.
902
00:53:45,387 --> 00:53:47,878
I'm, like, really into her.
903
00:53:50,492 --> 00:53:53,723
Okay, seriously, Thomas,
that's, you know, cool and all.
904
00:53:53,895 --> 00:53:56,830
But she's kind of always been around.
905
00:53:56,998 --> 00:53:59,523
It's like hooking up with J.B.
906
00:54:00,202 --> 00:54:01,669
But her tits are smaller.
907
00:54:01,837 --> 00:54:04,397
- Hey.
- I'm just saying.
908
00:54:04,573 --> 00:54:07,201
Kirby's sort of like one of us.
909
00:54:07,375 --> 00:54:10,344
You know, tonight's about the girls
we never had a shot at.
910
00:54:10,512 --> 00:54:14,107
Tonight's about changing the game.
911
00:55:57,586 --> 00:55:59,019
Heads will roll
912
00:55:59,187 --> 00:56:00,916
Heads will roll
913
00:56:01,089 --> 00:56:02,522
Heads will roll
914
00:56:03,892 --> 00:56:05,484
It's crazy out there.
915
00:56:05,660 --> 00:56:07,321
I haven't seen Tyler in an hour.
916
00:56:12,033 --> 00:56:14,058
We were slightly out of our league
on this mission.
917
00:56:19,641 --> 00:56:21,438
- Cool room.
- Thanks.
918
00:56:22,811 --> 00:56:24,403
It's a bit messy right now.
919
00:56:25,747 --> 00:56:27,578
Here, let me...
920
00:56:32,387 --> 00:56:34,582
So it's your birthday.
921
00:56:34,756 --> 00:56:37,748
Yeah, it's my birthday.
922
00:57:07,122 --> 00:57:08,646
Oh.
923
00:57:11,293 --> 00:57:13,727
I know where they build 'em
924
00:57:13,895 --> 00:57:17,353
I know where they're selling long
925
00:57:21,303 --> 00:57:25,467
Wider than the worst ones
Wider than the one I know
926
00:57:26,841 --> 00:57:28,968
Oh, my God. Thomas?
927
00:57:29,144 --> 00:57:30,509
Kirby.
928
00:57:30,679 --> 00:57:32,510
- Fuck off.
- I'm sorry. Hey, hey, Kirby...
929
00:57:32,681 --> 00:57:35,115
Thomas, what the fuck?
930
00:57:35,884 --> 00:57:37,613
Asshole.
931
00:57:41,723 --> 00:57:44,886
- Would you like a hand with that?
- How long have you been in there?
932
00:57:45,060 --> 00:57:46,687
- Fucking shit!
- What are you doing?
933
00:57:58,573 --> 00:57:59,597
Kirby!
934
00:58:00,408 --> 00:58:01,534
Kirby!
935
00:58:52,327 --> 00:58:54,488
Alexis, are you having a good time?
936
00:58:54,662 --> 00:58:55,959
No. I'm leaving.
937
00:59:13,581 --> 00:59:17,108
Hi. You've reached
the Kub residence. Please, leave a message.
938
00:59:17,285 --> 00:59:19,446
Thomas, it's me again.
I'm fucked, dude.
939
00:59:19,621 --> 00:59:23,921
I just got another call.
I'm sure the neighbors are exaggerating.
940
00:59:24,092 --> 00:59:26,652
- Please call me.
- Fuck.
941
00:59:32,734 --> 00:59:34,463
Your style and your physique
942
00:59:34,636 --> 00:59:37,969
And I ain't tryin' to critique
But you deserve a good drink, so, what's up?
943
00:59:38,139 --> 00:59:40,164
What you sippin'on?
It's no problem
944
00:59:40,341 --> 00:59:43,367
Black and gold bottles
Like I'm pro-New Orleans
945
00:59:43,545 --> 00:59:48,573
But, shorty, I'm far from a saint
But I got two AmEx's that look the same way
946
00:59:48,750 --> 00:59:53,653
Wale, D.C., that's me, huh
My Prada say Prada and they Prada say Fila
947
00:59:53,822 --> 00:59:56,313
I ain't gotta tell you
They know about me, huh
948
00:59:56,491 --> 00:59:59,085
Come to D.C. And I can make you a believer
949
00:59:59,260 --> 01:00:02,024
See, baby, I'm a leader
Day away from a Libra
950
01:00:02,197 --> 01:00:04,688
I ain't tryin' to lead you wrong, sugar
I need you
951
01:00:04,866 --> 01:00:07,130
So would you please listen
To what I'm gonna need from you
952
01:00:07,302 --> 01:00:09,600
Live for tonight
Before tomorrow's amnesia
953
01:00:09,771 --> 01:00:14,470
Pretty girls
I ask them do they smoke
954
01:00:15,376 --> 01:00:17,367
Holy shit!
955
01:00:18,346 --> 01:00:19,973
It's fucking insane.
956
01:00:37,065 --> 01:00:41,024
Thomas, look at what we did. Epic.
957
01:00:44,339 --> 01:00:46,899
Is this big enough to be cool?
958
01:00:48,176 --> 01:00:49,609
Game changer.
959
01:00:51,579 --> 01:00:53,240
Holy shit, it's the news.
960
01:01:00,822 --> 01:01:01,914
Dude, that's Thomas!
961
01:01:02,090 --> 01:01:05,059
Thomas! Thomas! Thomas!
962
01:01:05,226 --> 01:01:07,160
Are you hearing this?
963
01:01:07,328 --> 01:01:12,027
Thomas! Thomas! Thomas!
964
01:01:12,200 --> 01:01:13,895
This is your fucking party, man.
965
01:01:14,869 --> 01:01:17,064
You're right, dude. I needed this.
966
01:01:21,276 --> 01:01:22,470
Fuck, yeah!
967
01:01:30,518 --> 01:01:34,284
Look at me now, bitches!
My party is the shit!
968
01:01:34,856 --> 01:01:37,484
My party is legendary!
969
01:01:39,994 --> 01:01:42,428
Thomas! Thomas! Thomas!
970
01:01:42,597 --> 01:01:44,258
- Watch this.
- Watch what?
971
01:01:44,432 --> 01:01:48,425
Are you kidding me?
Hey, all you bitches. Aah!
972
01:01:50,271 --> 01:01:52,705
Know me from the you know
Boss in my Hugo
973
01:01:55,677 --> 01:01:58,145
Thomas, you crazy motherfucker!
I love you!
974
01:02:01,516 --> 01:02:05,953
Jump! Jump! Jump!
975
01:02:06,120 --> 01:02:08,884
Fuck that shit. I'm not jumping.
Fuck that.
976
01:02:09,324 --> 01:02:11,690
Jump! Jump! Jump!
977
01:02:14,929 --> 01:02:17,420
To my family members,
all my friends on Facebook...
978
01:02:17,599 --> 01:02:19,123
- What?
- It's been a great ride.
979
01:02:19,300 --> 01:02:22,394
- Costa, hold on to these.
- J.B., don't do it, man.
980
01:02:22,570 --> 01:02:24,299
- You're way too fat.
- Shut up.
981
01:02:30,945 --> 01:02:32,310
Yeah!
982
01:02:40,288 --> 01:02:42,279
Oh, my God!
983
01:02:45,159 --> 01:02:47,423
J.B., you all right, man?
984
01:02:48,129 --> 01:02:50,529
- J.B., you all right?
- Ha-ha-ha!
985
01:03:01,542 --> 01:03:02,600
This is Falcon One.
986
01:03:02,777 --> 01:03:05,746
I was just attacked
by this really sexy woman.
987
01:03:05,913 --> 01:03:08,541
We've lost all control.
The house was breached hours ago.
988
01:03:08,716 --> 01:03:10,183
Chaos has spread to the streets.
989
01:03:10,351 --> 01:03:13,115
And the police are returning in force.
We're clearly outnumbered.
990
01:03:22,030 --> 01:03:23,156
God, help us.
991
01:03:28,770 --> 01:03:30,328
Assholes!
992
01:03:38,913 --> 01:03:42,815
Cops go home! Cops go home! Cops go home!
993
01:03:42,984 --> 01:03:44,918
This is the police.
994
01:03:45,086 --> 01:03:48,715
Disperse peacefully and immediately
or you will be subject to arrest.
995
01:03:59,667 --> 01:04:01,430
In need of immediate assistance.
996
01:04:03,504 --> 01:04:04,698
Drive, drive, drive!
997
01:04:07,375 --> 01:04:09,673
Requesting backup, all units...
998
01:04:27,428 --> 01:04:28,486
Holy shit!
999
01:04:28,663 --> 01:04:30,563
I jumped off the house on purpose.
1000
01:04:34,435 --> 01:04:36,630
Chaos has broken out in the Southland...
1001
01:04:36,804 --> 01:04:41,332
...where this normally quiet residential
street has turned into anarchy.
1002
01:04:50,985 --> 01:04:54,284
I'm joined now by Captain Reesman
of the Police Department.
1003
01:04:54,455 --> 01:04:57,583
We'll have to let this thing burn out
before we even think about moving back in.
1004
01:05:28,189 --> 01:05:30,248
Shit, that's my dad's car.
Shit, dude.
1005
01:05:31,659 --> 01:05:32,751
Oh, shit.
1006
01:05:39,333 --> 01:05:41,392
Oh, shit!
1007
01:05:52,914 --> 01:05:55,144
Are you kidding me?
1008
01:05:58,152 --> 01:06:00,416
- What are you doing?
- What?
1009
01:06:00,588 --> 01:06:02,180
Fuck your car!
1010
01:06:05,059 --> 01:06:06,151
Motherfuckers!
1011
01:06:07,962 --> 01:06:10,988
Oh, my God, Thomas, we're fucked.
1012
01:06:11,165 --> 01:06:13,133
I don't know how to fix this.
1013
01:06:14,368 --> 01:06:16,893
I don't know how to fix any of this shit.
1014
01:06:17,071 --> 01:06:21,167
I'm sorry, Thomas.
I just wanted to get some pussy.
1015
01:06:24,545 --> 01:06:27,844
And something's just happening right now.
I've heard a commotion.
1016
01:06:29,884 --> 01:06:31,351
Holy shit!
1017
01:06:35,223 --> 01:06:37,020
What the fuck is that?
1018
01:06:37,191 --> 01:06:38,522
Whoa!
1019
01:06:41,729 --> 01:06:42,923
Outside visual on subject with...
1020
01:06:43,097 --> 01:06:44,655
Everybody, back!
1021
01:06:47,835 --> 01:06:49,393
Fuck! You guys, come on!
1022
01:06:49,570 --> 01:06:52,038
- Come on, get the fuck out of here! Move!
- Come on!
1023
01:06:52,206 --> 01:06:54,834
Go! Shit!
Come on!
1024
01:06:55,042 --> 01:06:58,034
Whoa! What the fuck, dude! Get down!
1025
01:06:58,212 --> 01:07:00,180
- Holy shit! Look out.
- Shit! What the fuck?
1026
01:07:01,749 --> 01:07:05,549
Subject is armed and active.
Oh, my fucking God.
1027
01:07:05,720 --> 01:07:09,850
Police are on scene in riot gear.
SWATofficers are rushing forward.
1028
01:07:10,024 --> 01:07:12,117
All units hold for SWAT team arrival.
1029
01:07:15,396 --> 01:07:17,364
Fuck!
Holy shit, dude, it's T-Rick!
1030
01:07:17,532 --> 01:07:21,366
- What the fuck is he doing?
- Costa!
1031
01:07:21,536 --> 01:07:24,869
Give me back my fucking gnome!
1032
01:07:25,039 --> 01:07:28,304
- Give it to him. Where is it?
- It was full of Ecstasy. Everyone ate it!
1033
01:07:28,476 --> 01:07:31,343
Where the fuck is Costa?
1034
01:07:31,512 --> 01:07:33,343
Subject is advancing.
1035
01:07:37,251 --> 01:07:39,378
Whoa, shit!
1036
01:07:41,055 --> 01:07:42,079
This is the police...
1037
01:07:42,256 --> 01:07:43,951
Approach with extreme caution.
1038
01:07:44,125 --> 01:07:47,424
Put down your weapon
and put your hands in the air.
1039
01:07:47,595 --> 01:07:50,291
Get down! Show me your hands!
Put down your weapon!
1040
01:07:50,464 --> 01:07:52,694
Police are now firing rubber bullets.
1041
01:07:52,867 --> 01:07:54,266
Drop it now!
Back up, back up!
1042
01:07:54,435 --> 01:07:55,459
Get back!
1043
01:07:56,571 --> 01:07:58,266
Suspect is firing at officers.
1044
01:07:58,773 --> 01:08:01,537
- Fuck this.
- Where are you going? Get back here!
1045
01:08:01,709 --> 01:08:02,835
Dude, Thomas, no!
1046
01:08:03,010 --> 01:08:05,501
Look, T-Rick, we can fix this.
Okay, man?
1047
01:08:05,680 --> 01:08:06,704
Fuck you!
1048
01:08:06,881 --> 01:08:10,180
You burn me, I burn you!
1049
01:08:10,351 --> 01:08:12,012
Thomas, get back here, dude!
1050
01:08:12,186 --> 01:08:13,710
Costa, you motherfucker!
1051
01:08:13,888 --> 01:08:16,118
Put down your weapon.
Put your hands in the air.
1052
01:08:16,290 --> 01:08:17,416
- Go, go, go!
- Shit!
1053
01:08:17,592 --> 01:08:19,457
Put down your weapon.
1054
01:08:19,627 --> 01:08:21,458
Yeah. Now. Take the shot!
1055
01:08:21,629 --> 01:08:22,857
Get the fuck out of here!
1056
01:08:23,030 --> 01:08:24,497
Go!
1057
01:08:26,033 --> 01:08:27,466
Get back. Get back!
1058
01:08:28,202 --> 01:08:29,328
Fuck. Oh, my God.
1059
01:08:29,503 --> 01:08:31,164
Still active and on the move.
1060
01:08:33,341 --> 01:08:34,865
Heading toward residence.
1061
01:08:37,211 --> 01:08:39,042
Holy shit!
1062
01:08:41,682 --> 01:08:43,741
This is the police.
1063
01:08:44,619 --> 01:08:46,712
Disperse immediately.
1064
01:08:47,455 --> 01:08:48,547
Oh, my God.
1065
01:08:48,723 --> 01:08:51,385
Disperse immediately
or you will be subject to arrest.
1066
01:08:52,059 --> 01:08:53,686
This is the police.
1067
01:08:58,399 --> 01:09:00,867
- We gotta get out of here.
- I can't leave my house.
1068
01:09:01,035 --> 01:09:02,935
The house is gone, man.
It's fucking over.
1069
01:09:03,104 --> 01:09:05,834
- Where's Milo?
- This is the police.
1070
01:09:13,280 --> 01:09:15,373
Disperse immediately.
1071
01:09:20,354 --> 01:09:21,514
Go, go!
1072
01:09:22,623 --> 01:09:24,750
I hear him here.
1073
01:09:24,925 --> 01:09:27,985
What the fuck are you doing?
The dog's not gonna be in that drawer.
1074
01:09:28,162 --> 01:09:30,494
Here he is! I got him! Motherfuckers!
1075
01:09:30,665 --> 01:09:32,189
Come on, let's go. Move!
1076
01:09:39,774 --> 01:09:41,765
It's complete chaos out here.
1077
01:09:41,942 --> 01:09:45,844
Police are using flash-bang grenades
to try and disperse this crowd.
1078
01:09:46,013 --> 01:09:47,275
This is the police.
1079
01:09:47,448 --> 01:09:49,746
Disperse immediately.
1080
01:09:49,917 --> 01:09:53,444
If you do not disperse immediately,
you will be subject to arrest.
1081
01:09:55,256 --> 01:09:56,621
Go! Go!
1082
01:09:56,791 --> 01:10:00,227
Police are now mobilizing.
Fire helicopters have been brought in.
1083
01:10:00,394 --> 01:10:03,227
They're dropping water
to put this blaze out.
1084
01:10:12,773 --> 01:10:16,004
Scene in progress,
50 yards ahead of IC. Officers need assistance.
1085
01:10:16,177 --> 01:10:17,974
Holy shit!
1086
01:10:18,145 --> 01:10:20,579
Tyler, I need you! Pull it together!
1087
01:10:23,551 --> 01:10:25,644
Civilians 50 yards ahead on Dickens.
1088
01:10:27,788 --> 01:10:30,120
- Officers engaged with riot...
- What is going on?
1089
01:10:30,291 --> 01:10:32,521
- Stay down. Stay down.
- Fuck! Shit!
1090
01:10:34,361 --> 01:10:35,851
Milo!
1091
01:10:36,764 --> 01:10:38,459
- Dude, Milo!
- Hey, Oliver!
1092
01:10:38,632 --> 01:10:40,259
Great party, buddy.
1093
01:10:40,434 --> 01:10:42,163
You owe me a tree, you piece of shit.
1094
01:10:42,336 --> 01:10:46,705
All we're doing is trying to have a good time,
you cocksucking motherfucker!
1095
01:10:46,874 --> 01:10:50,105
You know where you're going?
You're going to jail, you motherfucker!
1096
01:10:50,277 --> 01:10:55,044
Yeah! That's my boys! Suck my dick, Robert!
Suck my fucking dick!
1097
01:11:00,688 --> 01:11:01,780
Fuck! Shit!
1098
01:11:01,956 --> 01:11:05,016
Black sedan. License plate...
We've got a hit-and-run.
1099
01:11:05,192 --> 01:11:08,457
Go, go, go!
Run! Run!
1100
01:11:08,629 --> 01:11:10,460
Unit 23, what's your status?
1101
01:11:15,269 --> 01:11:18,705
Skirmish line, be advised,
officer down, officer down.
1102
01:11:37,458 --> 01:11:41,485
He's home alone. He's been up
all night, so he's probably gonna crash soon.
1103
01:11:41,662 --> 01:11:45,393
We wait about an hour to make sure
he's asleep, then we make our move.
1104
01:11:45,566 --> 01:11:48,433
We go in the back, break Rob's door down,
and torch the house.
1105
01:11:48,602 --> 01:11:50,661
- Yeah.
- What the fuck are you talking about?
1106
01:11:50,838 --> 01:11:54,001
The guy has a wife and a baby.
You're not gonna burn his house down.
1107
01:11:54,175 --> 01:11:56,302
He called the cops on us.
He ruined everything.
1108
01:11:56,477 --> 01:12:00,846
It's 6 in the morning, man.
Let it go. It's over.
1109
01:12:01,515 --> 01:12:03,312
Just go home.
1110
01:12:09,757 --> 01:12:11,384
What about our money?
1111
01:12:12,893 --> 01:12:16,693
The house is trashed.
You're the worst security ever.
1112
01:12:28,042 --> 01:12:29,703
You guys should go home too.
1113
01:12:31,979 --> 01:12:33,947
You gonna be okay, man?
1114
01:12:34,448 --> 01:12:37,281
Yeah, I'm just gonna hang here
with Milo for a bit.
1115
01:12:42,923 --> 01:12:43,947
All right.
1116
01:12:44,692 --> 01:12:46,592
I'm gonna go home...
1117
01:12:47,561 --> 01:12:51,361
...have a good cry,
and start calling some lawyers.
1118
01:12:53,100 --> 01:12:55,967
Thomas, whatever happens, man...
1119
01:12:57,037 --> 01:12:59,904
...that was one fucking hell of a night.
1120
01:13:00,407 --> 01:13:02,773
Come on, J.B., let's bounce.
1121
01:13:27,301 --> 01:13:29,565
You can go too, Dax.
1122
01:13:32,606 --> 01:13:34,403
Thanks, Thomas.
1123
01:13:34,775 --> 01:13:37,209
I had a really fun time.
1124
01:13:39,179 --> 01:13:41,079
You'll be all right.
1125
01:13:56,897 --> 01:13:58,922
Kevin and Bean
from the world-famous KROQ.
1126
01:13:59,099 --> 01:14:03,035
Can we talk about this insanity
in Pasadena last night?
1127
01:14:03,203 --> 01:14:05,034
It looked like the greatest party ever.
1128
01:14:05,205 --> 01:14:07,036
Big Boy's neighborhood, beautiful day.
1129
01:14:07,207 --> 01:14:09,607
It is going down.
I don't know if you seen the news.
1130
01:14:09,777 --> 01:14:13,873
But some cats had a party in Pasadena
and took this thing to the whole next level.
1131
01:14:14,048 --> 01:14:18,007
I'm talking about, they trashed the
neighborhood. They trashed the house.
1132
01:14:18,185 --> 01:14:20,244
We heard that Kanye
made an appearance there.
1133
01:14:20,421 --> 01:14:23,913
Yeah, so if you were there at the party
in Pasadena last night, hit us up...
1134
01:14:24,091 --> 01:14:27,788
...because we're gonna be talking about it
all morning long in the neighborhood.
1135
01:14:32,099 --> 01:14:35,591
- I really am sorry.
- You said that already.
1136
01:14:38,339 --> 01:14:42,400
Do you have any idea how much
all this is gonna cost, Thomas?
1137
01:14:44,845 --> 01:14:47,507
Your college fund is gone,
I can tell you that.
1138
01:14:49,483 --> 01:14:52,043
- Yeah. Dad, I'm sorry.
- You had so much going for you...
1139
01:14:52,219 --> 01:14:56,553
...and you just pissed it all away
for one night?
1140
01:15:00,761 --> 01:15:03,093
I just didn't think you had it in you.
1141
01:15:05,799 --> 01:15:09,326
Well, I know. I'm sorry I let you down.
1142
01:15:09,570 --> 01:15:11,128
No.
1143
01:15:11,405 --> 01:15:17,401
I literally didn't think
that you had this in you.
1144
01:15:20,948 --> 01:15:24,440
So, uh, how many people were here?
1145
01:15:25,119 --> 01:15:26,552
Uh...
1146
01:15:28,155 --> 01:15:29,645
Fifteen hundred.
1147
01:15:31,025 --> 01:15:33,186
Couple thousand, maybe.
1148
01:15:33,927 --> 01:15:35,292
Wow.
1149
01:15:36,797 --> 01:15:38,731
You should've seen it.
1150
01:15:42,036 --> 01:15:43,901
It was awesome.
1151
01:15:46,440 --> 01:15:49,432
Well, you're still fucked, Thomas.
1152
01:16:03,724 --> 01:16:05,191
It's the motherfucking D-O-double-G
1153
01:16:05,359 --> 01:16:07,224
Snoop Dogg
1154
01:16:08,328 --> 01:16:10,796
You know I'm mobbin'with the D-R-E
1155
01:16:10,964 --> 01:16:12,932
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know who's back...
1156
01:16:14,368 --> 01:16:16,393
Well, at least the van
looks gangster now.
1157
01:16:16,570 --> 01:16:19,937
Dude, don't even start, okay?
My dad's making me drive it as punishment.
1158
01:16:20,107 --> 01:16:21,836
That sucks.
1159
01:16:22,009 --> 01:16:25,172
Yeah, and I'm being brought up on
like six different charges.
1160
01:16:25,345 --> 01:16:27,438
My mom hasn't stopped crying.
1161
01:16:27,614 --> 01:16:30,014
We're living at a Courtyard Marriott
right now.
1162
01:16:30,184 --> 01:16:32,311
I'm basically on house arrest
until my hearing.
1163
01:16:32,486 --> 01:16:34,215
I'm not supposed to talk to you guys.
1164
01:16:34,388 --> 01:16:37,846
My parents are convinced this is totally
gonna be fucking my college plans.
1165
01:16:38,025 --> 01:16:40,220
Your grades are fucking up
your college plans.
1166
01:16:40,394 --> 01:16:43,386
My dad got me a lawyer.
Even that Jew thinks we're fucked.
1167
01:16:43,564 --> 01:16:46,362
- Thinks we could actually do time for this.
- Jesus.
1168
01:16:46,533 --> 01:16:48,763
What about you, Dax?
What did your parents say?
1169
01:16:48,936 --> 01:16:51,496
Oh, I live alone, actually.
1170
01:16:52,773 --> 01:16:55,264
You're really starting
to fucking scare me.
1171
01:16:57,377 --> 01:16:59,345
Yo, what up, Kub?
1172
01:17:02,015 --> 01:17:03,710
What's going on, man?
1173
01:17:03,884 --> 01:17:05,476
That's him.
1174
01:17:09,389 --> 01:17:10,447
Hey, Costa.
1175
01:17:10,624 --> 01:17:13,058
- Hi, Thomas.
- Thank you.
1176
01:17:13,227 --> 01:17:15,058
Thank you.
1177
01:17:17,097 --> 01:17:20,225
Yo, you guys, Thomas.
That party was dope.
1178
01:17:20,400 --> 01:17:22,391
Thank you, man.
No, thank you, man.
1179
01:17:22,569 --> 01:17:24,059
You guys rock.
1180
01:17:29,376 --> 01:17:30,468
Thank you.
1181
01:17:32,112 --> 01:17:33,636
J. B!
1182
01:17:34,648 --> 01:17:37,811
Thomas! Thomas! Thomas!
1183
01:17:55,602 --> 01:17:57,126
Kirby, wait.
1184
01:17:58,472 --> 01:17:59,905
Kirby.
1185
01:18:00,774 --> 01:18:03,834
- Hey.
- Hey, look, I just wanted to talk to you.
1186
01:18:04,011 --> 01:18:07,674
- There's really nothing to talk about.
- Wait. Please, can I just explain?
1187
01:18:08,048 --> 01:18:09,447
It's not that complicated.
1188
01:18:09,950 --> 01:18:14,046
What you did was really not cool.
1189
01:18:15,355 --> 01:18:17,186
It really hurt me.
1190
01:18:17,558 --> 01:18:19,549
Kirby, I'm really sorry about
what happened.
1191
01:18:20,027 --> 01:18:22,222
I didn't know how to handle it.
1192
01:18:23,864 --> 01:18:26,924
But I think I do now
and that's why I'm here.
1193
01:18:29,703 --> 01:18:32,934
My life right now, it's totally ruined.
1194
01:18:33,106 --> 01:18:36,564
Okay? I practically burned down
my whole neighborhood.
1195
01:18:37,211 --> 01:18:40,612
Probably bankrupt my parents.
I'll be in debt until I die.
1196
01:18:40,781 --> 01:18:43,944
But the only thing that I care about
fixing right now is this.
1197
01:18:44,117 --> 01:18:45,414
So, I'm sorry.
1198
01:18:47,020 --> 01:18:49,545
If you're still mad, I get it...
1199
01:18:49,756 --> 01:18:53,556
...but if you are talking to me
by my next birthday...
1200
01:18:53,727 --> 01:18:56,662
...I'd really like to spend it with just you.
1201
01:19:05,272 --> 01:19:06,762
Oh, you're...
1202
01:19:13,814 --> 01:19:15,907
So we're cool again?
1203
01:19:16,083 --> 01:19:18,449
I never said you were cool.
1204
01:19:31,531 --> 01:19:35,126
So you know this high school party
in Pasadena that turned into a riot, right?
1205
01:19:35,302 --> 01:19:38,465
The kid actually burned his parents'
house down. Can you imagi...?
1206
01:19:38,639 --> 01:19:41,267
Do you know how many chores
it's gonna take to make up for...
1207
01:19:42,943 --> 01:19:46,344
He'll be taking the trash out
nine times a day for the rest of his life.
1208
01:19:46,546 --> 01:19:50,778
The person who caused
the early morning fire and explosion here...
1209
01:19:50,951 --> 01:19:54,682
...has survived his injuries...
Costa!
1210
01:19:54,855 --> 01:19:57,653
We moved to a place like Pasadena
to avoid stuff like this.
1211
01:19:57,824 --> 01:20:00,918
Some asshole puked all over
my front door.
1212
01:20:01,094 --> 01:20:05,155
Do these kids even have parents?
It's ridiculous, right?
1213
01:20:06,400 --> 01:20:08,630
Have you seen the footage?
Let me tell you.
1214
01:20:08,802 --> 01:20:13,000
I haven't seen that many teenage boobs
since R. Kelly's birthday party.
1215
01:21:00,554 --> 01:21:06,049
Joining us now live is one Pasadena teen
who's recently drawn a lot of notice...
1216
01:21:06,226 --> 01:21:08,126
...for throwing what people
are calling...
1217
01:21:08,295 --> 01:21:11,355
...possibly the most epic
high-school party of all time.
1218
01:21:11,531 --> 01:21:15,399
Costa, before we begin, is there anything
that you would like to say to the viewers?
1219
01:21:15,569 --> 01:21:16,729
In fact, I would.
1220
01:21:16,903 --> 01:21:20,031
You said it was perhaps
the most epic party of all time.
1221
01:21:20,207 --> 01:21:22,539
It was the most epic party of all time.
1222
01:21:22,709 --> 01:21:26,201
Okay. I was thinking more along
the lines of an apology.
1223
01:21:26,380 --> 01:21:27,779
Would you like to apologize?
1224
01:21:27,948 --> 01:21:30,974
I got a better idea.
How about I invite you to my next party?
1225
01:21:31,451 --> 01:21:33,476
- What?
- Yeah, you heard me, sugar-tits.
1226
01:21:33,653 --> 01:21:35,484
Just make sure
you wear something tight.
1227
01:21:36,305 --> 01:21:42,153
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