1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 2 00:00:25,442 --> 00:00:30,404 And on that point, members of the jury, I rest my case. 3 00:00:49,549 --> 00:00:52,468 (camera clicks) 4 00:00:55,513 --> 00:00:57,222 (alarm) 5 00:01:24,501 --> 00:01:26,585 Hello, Wanda. 6 00:02:38,616 --> 00:02:41,577 - Hi, Ken. - Hello, W-W-Wanda. 7 00:02:42,078 --> 00:02:45,914 Ken... this is Otto. 8 00:02:46,082 --> 00:02:48,250 Hello. Wanda's told me a lot about you. 9 00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:50,252 Hey! Great fish! 10 00:02:50,420 --> 00:02:53,088 A little squeeze of lemon, some tartare sauce, perfect! 11 00:02:54,716 --> 00:02:56,508 George back yet? 12 00:02:57,260 --> 00:02:59,887 No. He had to g-g-go to the b-b-b... 13 00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:06,476 What? 14 00:03:06,644 --> 00:03:09,855 That's quite a stutter you've got there, Ken. 15 00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:14,610 It's all right, it doesn't bother me. So George needs a weapons man, eh? 16 00:03:15,486 --> 00:03:17,196 A cup of tea, Ken? 17 00:03:17,363 --> 00:03:18,947 Y-y-y... 18 00:03:19,115 --> 00:03:21,116 Yeah. He'd like one. 19 00:03:21,284 --> 00:03:24,494 I had a good friend in the CIA had a stutter. Cost him his life. 20 00:03:24,662 --> 00:03:26,788 (door opens) 21 00:03:27,957 --> 00:03:30,083 Hi, George. 22 00:03:31,586 --> 00:03:34,171 Hello, George. Get you a Scotch? 23 00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:36,006 Yeah. 24 00:03:36,174 --> 00:03:39,593 George... this is Otto. 25 00:03:41,763 --> 00:03:44,181 So, you're Wanda's brother. 26 00:03:44,349 --> 00:03:47,976 It's good to be here, George. England is a fine country. 27 00:03:48,561 --> 00:03:50,979 She tell you what we need? 28 00:03:55,151 --> 00:03:57,027 (Ken gasps) 29 00:04:00,031 --> 00:04:02,157 Something like that? 30 00:04:03,618 --> 00:04:05,577 Something like that. 31 00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:09,623 Hello, Wendy. 32 00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:13,460 Had a good day? 33 00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:16,713 I spend the morning trying to get a waste-disposal man, 34 00:04:16,881 --> 00:04:20,634 have lunch with Marjorie, who kept complaining about her husband, 35 00:04:20,802 --> 00:04:23,512 then I have to play three rubbers with Philippa. 36 00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:26,515 And now Sanderson's have sent the wrong flowers. 37 00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:28,350 Oh, no! 38 00:04:30,311 --> 00:04:33,438 - Would you like some tea? - Yes. 39 00:04:35,316 --> 00:04:36,400 I won the case. 40 00:04:36,567 --> 00:04:38,860 This is my first moment of peace all day. 41 00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:47,494 - Hello, Portia. How was the show? - Awful. I've got to have a new horse. 42 00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:50,622 - I thought you liked Phantom. - He's not fit for dog meat. 43 00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:54,376 - Can I change him? It won't cost much. - Oughtn't we to ask... 44 00:04:54,544 --> 00:04:57,546 I thought you were making tea, Archie. I'd better do it. 45 00:04:57,714 --> 00:05:00,716 - Let me do it. - No, I'll do it! 46 00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:07,931 - I won the case. - Oh! Now this is cracked. 47 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,853 They're worth about 100,000 each. 48 00:05:13,021 --> 00:05:17,357 There are 135 of them. That makes 13 millions, my friends. 49 00:05:17,525 --> 00:05:20,360 - Dollars or pounds? - Pounds, pet. 50 00:05:20,528 --> 00:05:23,113 This is the big one. So... 51 00:05:24,365 --> 00:05:26,116 OK. 52 00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:28,035 Yeah. 53 00:05:28,870 --> 00:05:30,704 Otto? 54 00:05:30,872 --> 00:05:32,956 - Yes? - OK? 55 00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:35,959 - What? - The plan. 56 00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:38,920 Yeah. Great. No problem. 57 00:05:39,088 --> 00:05:41,590 What was the middle thing, about the police? 58 00:05:43,176 --> 00:05:45,552 We don't meet up at Heathrow until Tuesday... 59 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:48,764 - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I haven't finished yet. 60 00:05:48,931 --> 00:05:52,934 Because the police will watch all the airports for 72 hours. 61 00:05:53,102 --> 00:05:55,020 I know. I know. 62 00:05:56,272 --> 00:06:00,609 Do you want m-m-me to g-g-get a b-b-big 63 00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:04,279 c-c-car? 64 00:06:04,447 --> 00:06:07,324 Yes, Ken. A limo, OK? 65 00:06:07,492 --> 00:06:10,118 And put diplomatic plates on it, right? 66 00:06:10,286 --> 00:06:12,245 What if he has to speak in the break-in? 67 00:06:12,413 --> 00:06:14,664 Nobody says anything during a break-in. 68 00:06:14,832 --> 00:06:17,459 It's OK, Otto. Ken's good. 69 00:06:18,127 --> 00:06:22,089 So next week we won't have to look for work. 70 00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:25,592 And it won't have to look for us. 71 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:27,844 Oscar Wilde. 72 00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:36,520 You really like animals, don't you, Ken? What's the attraction? 73 00:06:36,687 --> 00:06:42,150 Because you can t-t-trust them, and they don't sh-sh-sh... 74 00:06:42,318 --> 00:06:45,821 - Shit on you? - Show off all the time. 75 00:06:45,988 --> 00:06:51,076 Know what Nietzsche said about them? He said they were God's second blunder. 76 00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:52,744 Bye, sis. 77 00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:57,165 Well, you t-tell him from me that I-I-I... 78 00:06:57,333 --> 00:06:59,000 Bye, George. 79 00:07:00,044 --> 00:07:01,795 If you talk to Mom, tell her I said hi. 80 00:07:01,963 --> 00:07:03,964 - OK. - (whispers) Don't let him touch you. 81 00:07:04,132 --> 00:07:05,882 One more day, we're together. 82 00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:13,265 I'm sorry about my brother, Ken. I know he's insensitive. 83 00:07:14,225 --> 00:07:17,894 He's had a hard life. Dad used to beat him up. 84 00:07:22,024 --> 00:07:23,150 Good. 85 00:07:23,985 --> 00:07:26,736 - (man yells) - (screaming) 86 00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:51,655 (George) Anybody moves and you're dead! 87 00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:14,135 (alarm) 88 00:09:18,307 --> 00:09:20,433 (dogs yap) 89 00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:25,480 Look where you're going! Chauvinist pig! 90 00:09:26,148 --> 00:09:29,693 Really! People here just think they own the pavement! 91 00:09:31,612 --> 00:09:33,405 (engine starts) 92 00:09:37,493 --> 00:09:39,286 (brakes screech) 93 00:09:57,346 --> 00:10:00,890 That was fun. I love robbing the English. They're so polite. 94 00:10:01,058 --> 00:10:03,018 - The d-d-d... - What is it, Ken? 95 00:10:03,185 --> 00:10:05,770 - The dog! - We didn't hit the dog, Ken. It's OK. 96 00:10:05,938 --> 00:10:07,772 $20 million, he worried about an insect. 97 00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:09,357 It's not an-an-an... 98 00:10:09,525 --> 00:10:11,026 Stutter's not getting any better, is it? 99 00:10:11,193 --> 00:10:12,444 Shut up! 100 00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:14,696 - Shut up! - (siren) 101 00:10:20,703 --> 00:10:22,579 Ken? 102 00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:25,540 Bye. 103 00:10:56,530 --> 00:10:58,615 - Let's split. - Heathrow, Tuesday. 104 00:10:58,866 --> 00:11:01,993 - Lie low. No celebrating. - No celebrating? 105 00:11:03,162 --> 00:11:05,664 - See you in a couple of hours. - OK. Bye. 106 00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:56,423 - To 20 million. - To a job well done. 107 00:11:56,590 --> 00:11:57,716 To us. 108 00:11:57,883 --> 00:12:00,719 To the best brother-and-sister team since... 109 00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:02,887 Romeo and Juliet? 110 00:12:03,055 --> 00:12:07,142 Do you believe those cockney klutzes bought our story? What morons! 111 00:12:07,309 --> 00:12:09,352 - I want you to know something. - What? 112 00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:13,148 Even if you were my brother, I'd still want to fuck you. 113 00:12:13,649 --> 00:12:15,275 Oooh! 114 00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:18,570 - Make the call. - Momento, carissima. 115 00:12:18,738 --> 00:12:20,530 No. No Italian! 116 00:12:20,698 --> 00:12:21,698 Hey! 117 00:12:21,866 --> 00:12:27,829 Per cominciare, due insalate verdi con peperoni e un linguini primavera. 118 00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:30,707 No. Make the call, Otto. 119 00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:35,170 - Are you really Italian? - Absolutamente. Si. 120 00:12:35,337 --> 00:12:38,965 My name is Otto. It means eight. Say "Arrivederci a Giorgio." 121 00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:42,177 - Bye, George. - (Italian accent) Police, please. 122 00:12:42,344 --> 00:12:44,304 - Otto! - Argh! 123 00:12:45,723 --> 00:12:49,392 (English accent) Hello. I thought it might interest you to know 124 00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:52,896 that the Hatton Garden robbery today was pulled off 125 00:12:53,063 --> 00:12:56,566 by a Mr. George Thomason, who lives at 126 00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:59,486 Flat 3, Kipling Mansions, 127 00:12:59,653 --> 00:13:03,239 Murray Road, London, West 9. 128 00:13:03,699 --> 00:13:05,325 Wanda? 129 00:13:16,086 --> 00:13:18,171 (siren) 130 00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,433 Police! Open up! 131 00:13:32,353 --> 00:13:34,521 Come on, open up! 132 00:13:37,566 --> 00:13:40,068 Open the door, or we'll knock it down. 133 00:13:50,412 --> 00:13:52,247 George Francis Thomason? 134 00:14:04,802 --> 00:14:07,637 Passport, tickets... 135 00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:09,722 ...money. 136 00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:16,312 - (horn) - (Otto) Asshole! 137 00:14:16,480 --> 00:14:18,106 (crash) 138 00:14:26,490 --> 00:14:28,992 - We're rich, Wanda. - Yep? 139 00:14:30,619 --> 00:14:31,995 I bet these last two weeks with me 140 00:14:32,162 --> 00:14:34,873 have been the most exciting two weeks of your life. 141 00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:36,958 You said it. 142 00:14:45,968 --> 00:14:48,428 (breathes deeply) 143 00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:52,307 OK. 144 00:14:52,474 --> 00:14:54,142 Disappointed! 145 00:14:55,102 --> 00:14:56,936 Son of a bitch! 146 00:14:57,104 --> 00:15:00,148 What do you have to do in this life to make people trust you? 147 00:15:00,316 --> 00:15:01,774 Shut up. 148 00:15:02,651 --> 00:15:04,319 People always take advantage of me. 149 00:15:04,486 --> 00:15:06,487 Shut up and think. Where's he moved it? 150 00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:12,994 - What are you doing? - I'm thinking! 151 00:15:13,162 --> 00:15:14,913 Thinking what I'll do to him. 152 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,998 First, I'll hang him up with piano wire... 153 00:15:17,166 --> 00:15:19,792 - Where are you going? - To talk to him. 154 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,669 Then... 155 00:15:21,837 --> 00:15:23,838 Talk to who? Talk to who?! 156 00:15:24,673 --> 00:15:27,175 So while installing windows for your parents, 157 00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:31,012 you were kneeling on the floor where there was broken glass? 158 00:15:31,180 --> 00:15:34,307 - That's right, sir. - And your parents can confirm this? 159 00:15:34,475 --> 00:15:37,352 Yes. And his aunt, Georgina Thomason. 160 00:15:37,519 --> 00:15:39,395 - Good, Bartlett. - (knock at door) 161 00:15:39,563 --> 00:15:41,356 Yes? 162 00:15:41,523 --> 00:15:43,149 Sorry to interrupt you, sir. 163 00:15:43,317 --> 00:15:46,027 - Thomason, lady to see you. - Anything else? 164 00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:48,696 No. You don't have to dash off, do you? 165 00:15:48,864 --> 00:15:51,032 No, absolutely not. George? 166 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:54,035 Ken's got the fish food. He'll be in later. 167 00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:56,204 - Thanks. - De nada. 168 00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:59,040 - What do you think? - We may be all right on the glass. 169 00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:01,668 But what else are they gonna come up with? 170 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:08,049 (wolf whistle) 171 00:16:12,137 --> 00:16:16,516 Oh, George! Oh, my God, I can't believe this is happening! 172 00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:19,268 That's not allowed in here, miss. 173 00:16:20,020 --> 00:16:21,604 - Are you OK? - It's all right. 174 00:16:21,772 --> 00:16:24,148 I don't think I can handle this. 175 00:16:24,316 --> 00:16:26,401 I was so afraid to go to sleep last night, I... 176 00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:29,070 Leave it out. Leave it out, OK? 177 00:16:29,738 --> 00:16:32,657 Now listen, listen, listen, listen. Listen. 178 00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:36,786 You stayed at my place. 179 00:16:37,955 --> 00:16:41,582 We slept late. You made me breakfast. 180 00:16:46,422 --> 00:16:48,381 What? 181 00:16:48,549 --> 00:16:52,760 - What's he doing here? - He wanted to see you. 182 00:16:52,928 --> 00:16:55,763 Who did it, George? Kevin Delaney? 183 00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:58,766 Want me to rub him out? Anything. You name it. 184 00:16:59,977 --> 00:17:02,937 - I have friends making enquiries. - Good. 185 00:17:03,981 --> 00:17:06,566 The jewels are very safe. 186 00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:10,278 If I get sent down, it all gets handed back to cut my sentence. 187 00:17:10,446 --> 00:17:14,907 Now, to cut my sentence even more, I could tell them who done it with me, 188 00:17:15,075 --> 00:17:18,619 if I wasn't very happy about everything. 189 00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:22,123 What was the middle thing? 190 00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:24,333 Piss off. 191 00:17:27,963 --> 00:17:30,715 - You want me to spring you? - Now! 192 00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:37,638 George? 193 00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:41,726 - You don't think...? - Do you? 194 00:17:41,894 --> 00:17:43,811 No! 195 00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:47,982 No? 196 00:17:49,193 --> 00:17:51,652 - No. - OK. 197 00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:53,863 - George? - What? 198 00:17:54,948 --> 00:17:57,366 Are you sure the garage is very safe? 199 00:17:59,661 --> 00:18:01,120 Trust me. 200 00:18:01,955 --> 00:18:03,706 Thank you very much. 201 00:18:03,874 --> 00:18:06,375 Thanks a lot. Bye. Have a good day. 202 00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:10,838 - So? - Well, he's not sure it was you. 203 00:18:11,006 --> 00:18:12,173 What about you? 204 00:18:12,341 --> 00:18:15,259 He believes me. He can't figure out you. 205 00:18:15,427 --> 00:18:19,138 - Figure out what? - If you turned him in or not, stupid! 206 00:18:20,474 --> 00:18:23,684 Don't, uh, ever, ever, 207 00:18:23,852 --> 00:18:26,979 ever call me stupid. OK? 208 00:18:29,858 --> 00:18:31,526 What? 209 00:18:34,696 --> 00:18:37,031 That's George's lawyer. 210 00:18:37,199 --> 00:18:39,867 The other guy must be the barrister. 211 00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:43,538 - So? - Trust me. 212 00:18:46,834 --> 00:18:49,127 - Let me know if anything turns up. - Yes. 213 00:18:49,294 --> 00:18:51,379 Excuse me. 214 00:18:51,547 --> 00:18:53,756 Don't I recognize you? 215 00:18:53,924 --> 00:18:55,883 No. No, I don't think so. 216 00:18:56,051 --> 00:18:57,552 Oh. 217 00:18:57,719 --> 00:19:00,763 But you are a famous barrister, aren't you? 218 00:19:00,931 --> 00:19:03,432 Er... well, hardly. 219 00:19:04,309 --> 00:19:07,270 Well, could I have your autograph anyway? 220 00:19:09,064 --> 00:19:11,274 - Yes, yes. Certainly. - Thanks. 221 00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:15,570 I'm studying aspects of your legal system. I'm American. 222 00:19:15,737 --> 00:19:18,239 - Oh, really? - I've just started, though. 223 00:19:18,407 --> 00:19:19,407 It's fascinating. 224 00:19:19,575 --> 00:19:21,993 What, er, what brings you here? 225 00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:26,164 Oh, it's a little embarrassing. I... have a friend. 226 00:19:26,331 --> 00:19:29,417 Oh! Oh, I see. Well, there you are. 227 00:19:29,585 --> 00:19:32,795 I knew it! You're Archie Leash! 228 00:19:32,963 --> 00:19:34,922 - Leach. - Right! 229 00:19:35,090 --> 00:19:38,759 I saw you in court. Uh, two weeks ago. 230 00:19:38,927 --> 00:19:42,263 - The casino break-in? - You were great! 231 00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:47,185 Oh, I'm a big fan of yours. I love the way you... cross-examine. 232 00:19:49,146 --> 00:19:52,690 - Oh, I really admire your work. - Thank you. 233 00:19:55,444 --> 00:19:58,613 - I'd better not... - I don't suppose you...? No. Fine. 234 00:19:58,780 --> 00:20:00,281 Well... 235 00:20:00,741 --> 00:20:03,284 Thank you for this. I'll treasure it. 236 00:20:05,954 --> 00:20:07,788 Au revoir. 237 00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:12,084 You speak French, too. 238 00:20:13,378 --> 00:20:15,463 (Wanda sighs) 239 00:20:31,939 --> 00:20:33,648 What's going on? 240 00:20:33,815 --> 00:20:37,568 Whatever George decides to do, he's gonna tell Leach first. 241 00:20:37,736 --> 00:20:40,238 - Why? - Because he's his lawyer. 242 00:20:40,405 --> 00:20:44,492 - Yeah, yeah. I know that. - So I'm gonna get to know Mr. Leach. 243 00:20:44,660 --> 00:20:47,119 George will tell him where the diamonds are? 244 00:20:47,287 --> 00:20:49,705 That's what I'm gonna find out. 245 00:21:01,677 --> 00:21:03,886 You done well, my son. 246 00:21:04,054 --> 00:21:06,555 Now, where are we going to hide it? 247 00:21:10,435 --> 00:21:16,023 Very good! Don't tell Wanda anything. Otto might get something out of her. 248 00:21:16,191 --> 00:21:18,526 - Now... - George... 249 00:21:18,944 --> 00:21:21,404 You are gonna g-g-get off, aren't you? 250 00:21:21,571 --> 00:21:25,783 Sure, don't worry about it, Ken. We'll fix it. Now, anything on Otto? 251 00:21:26,910 --> 00:21:28,869 Not yet. 252 00:21:29,037 --> 00:21:30,746 You watch him. 253 00:21:33,875 --> 00:21:35,626 Ken? 254 00:21:36,712 --> 00:21:38,462 OK. 255 00:21:38,630 --> 00:21:41,215 Looks like the police have been all over it. 256 00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:44,885 Let me just change clothes, and then I'll help you look. 257 00:21:45,053 --> 00:21:49,265 (English accent) Hello, K-K-Ken's p-p-pets. 258 00:21:50,017 --> 00:21:51,642 Hey! 259 00:21:52,352 --> 00:21:55,563 Wake up! Wake up, limey fish! 260 00:21:58,150 --> 00:22:01,068 So, how are you gonna get friendly with this lawyer? 261 00:22:01,236 --> 00:22:03,738 I don't know. I'll improvise. 262 00:22:03,905 --> 00:22:05,406 Fucking insects! 263 00:22:05,574 --> 00:22:09,160 I thought Englishmen didn't like women, the way they talk. 264 00:22:09,328 --> 00:22:14,081 No. He's straight. He's kinda cute, too, in a pompous sort of way. 265 00:22:16,418 --> 00:22:19,962 - You got the hots for him? - I'm not into necrophilia. 266 00:22:20,130 --> 00:22:21,756 (Otto laughs) 267 00:22:21,923 --> 00:22:24,592 What is this, Hump a Limey Week suddenly? 268 00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:27,762 Otto doesn't approve. Otto might get jealous. 269 00:22:28,513 --> 00:22:32,892 E molto pericoloso, signorina. 270 00:22:33,060 --> 00:22:35,102 Molto pericolo... 271 00:22:41,943 --> 00:22:44,445 - Carissima. - Oh, speak it. Speak it! 272 00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:48,240 Un ossobuco milanese con piselli. 273 00:22:49,117 --> 00:22:54,246 Melanzane parmigiana con spinaci. 274 00:22:54,414 --> 00:22:57,458 - Dov'e la farmacia? - Yes, yes, yes! 275 00:22:57,626 --> 00:22:59,293 - No, no, no. - Si, si, si. 276 00:22:59,461 --> 00:23:01,796 No, no, no. No, not here. 277 00:23:01,963 --> 00:23:04,048 - Otto, no. - Dov'e la Fontana di Trevi? 278 00:23:04,216 --> 00:23:06,717 - Not here, Otto! - Um... 279 00:23:06,885 --> 00:23:08,928 - Mozzarella. - No! Not here. 280 00:23:09,096 --> 00:23:11,430 - Parmigiana. Gorgonzola! - Otto, no! 281 00:23:11,598 --> 00:23:12,640 Eh! 282 00:23:17,437 --> 00:23:19,480 Wanda? 283 00:23:24,194 --> 00:23:26,821 Look what I've got, Wanda. 284 00:23:28,365 --> 00:23:30,282 Treasure! 285 00:24:15,120 --> 00:24:17,037 - (screams) - Oh! 286 00:24:17,205 --> 00:24:20,124 Oh, Ken, it's you! I thought it was the police again. 287 00:24:20,292 --> 00:24:23,043 Isn't it horrible about George? Oh, Ken! 288 00:24:23,211 --> 00:24:26,380 I've such a headache. Could you pick me up some aspirin? 289 00:24:26,548 --> 00:24:27,923 (clatter) 290 00:24:28,091 --> 00:24:31,135 - What's that? - My brother. He's using the bathroom. 291 00:24:31,303 --> 00:24:33,762 - Otto? - Mm. We just went and saw George. 292 00:24:33,930 --> 00:24:37,057 Oh, it was horrible, Ken. It was just horrible. 293 00:24:41,563 --> 00:24:44,940 - Wh... - Isn't it terrible about George? 294 00:24:45,108 --> 00:24:48,068 When I find the bastard who squealed...! 295 00:24:48,236 --> 00:24:50,404 I love that man! 296 00:24:50,572 --> 00:24:53,157 What are you d-d-doing here? 297 00:24:53,325 --> 00:24:55,409 What am I doing here? 298 00:24:55,577 --> 00:24:57,661 Wanda was upset. She needed family. 299 00:24:57,829 --> 00:25:02,249 Sh-sh-she just had a sh-sh-shower. 300 00:25:05,003 --> 00:25:08,214 - I've got to speak to you. - (Wanda wails) 301 00:25:08,381 --> 00:25:10,341 - Are you OK now, sis? - I'm fine. 302 00:25:10,509 --> 00:25:12,843 - Call me if you need me. - OK. Thanks. 303 00:25:15,138 --> 00:25:18,265 What's the matter? Can't you think about her feelings? 304 00:25:18,433 --> 00:25:21,852 - There's something f-f-funny going on. - Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. 305 00:25:22,020 --> 00:25:23,604 You don't even know why you're excited. 306 00:25:23,772 --> 00:25:26,732 - I saw... - Ken, Ken, Ken! 307 00:25:27,567 --> 00:25:29,818 I didn't wanna say anything with George here, 308 00:25:29,986 --> 00:25:32,780 but isn't it time you faced reality? 309 00:25:32,948 --> 00:25:36,325 Come on! You're a very attractive man, Ken. 310 00:25:36,493 --> 00:25:38,786 You're smart. You've got... 311 00:25:38,954 --> 00:25:43,332 ...wonderful bones, great eyes, and you dress really interestingly. 312 00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:46,627 - Wh-what... - We could have fun together, you and I. 313 00:25:46,795 --> 00:25:50,172 And I think we'd be really good for each other. What do you say? 314 00:25:52,133 --> 00:25:53,968 You must be j-j-j... 315 00:25:54,135 --> 00:25:56,512 - May I kiss you? - No, you fucking can't! 316 00:25:56,680 --> 00:25:59,306 - Just a peck! No tongue! Ken! - No! 317 00:26:06,147 --> 00:26:09,149 Ken! OK. You didn't realize I was gay. 318 00:26:09,317 --> 00:26:12,152 OK. No, look, I'm sorry. 319 00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:16,532 I've handled this badly. Look... the physical side can wait. 320 00:26:17,701 --> 00:26:19,368 You need time. 321 00:26:19,661 --> 00:26:22,413 But... will you think about it? 322 00:26:46,021 --> 00:26:47,980 Oh, my God. 323 00:26:49,524 --> 00:26:51,609 Oh, my God! 324 00:26:52,277 --> 00:26:55,070 Ken, somebody just called! 325 00:26:55,614 --> 00:26:59,700 They said that the police know that the loot is in a garage in Fulham. 326 00:26:59,868 --> 00:27:01,702 You and I have to go get it. 327 00:27:01,870 --> 00:27:04,038 You and I have to go move it before the police find it. 328 00:27:04,205 --> 00:27:06,081 - No, no, no. - What? 329 00:27:06,249 --> 00:27:07,541 - It's all right! - What? 330 00:27:07,709 --> 00:27:09,126 Ge-Ge-Ge... 331 00:27:09,294 --> 00:27:11,045 George. 332 00:27:11,212 --> 00:27:13,547 - M-m-m... - Moved. 333 00:27:14,924 --> 00:27:16,884 George moved the loot?! 334 00:27:17,052 --> 00:27:18,052 Yes. 335 00:27:18,219 --> 00:27:20,679 Where'd he move it, Ken?! Where did he move it?! 336 00:27:20,847 --> 00:27:22,514 C-c-c... 337 00:27:34,903 --> 00:27:36,612 I don't know where it is. There's a key. 338 00:27:36,780 --> 00:27:38,822 I don't know what it's for. It's in the... 339 00:27:40,909 --> 00:27:44,328 Don't tell me. It's better that you don't tell me. 340 00:27:45,705 --> 00:27:49,416 Oh, you know, if it wasn't for George... 341 00:27:54,756 --> 00:27:56,215 Otto... 342 00:27:57,258 --> 00:28:00,344 ...tried to k-k-kiss me. 343 00:28:02,555 --> 00:28:05,140 I thought he might. 344 00:28:07,352 --> 00:28:10,604 No. Nothing, no marks at all. 345 00:28:10,772 --> 00:28:12,940 - But it is a safety deposit box key? - Oh, yes. 346 00:28:13,108 --> 00:28:15,150 But there are millions of them. 347 00:28:15,318 --> 00:28:17,778 Hotels, banks, offices... Sorry. 348 00:28:18,530 --> 00:28:20,280 Thank you. 349 00:28:20,824 --> 00:28:22,324 (whispers) Fuck! 350 00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:41,969 That's him. That's him, Inspector. 351 00:28:42,137 --> 00:28:44,805 He's the one who tried to murder my dogs. 352 00:28:46,975 --> 00:28:49,059 (doorbell) 353 00:29:03,366 --> 00:29:05,325 Davidson? 354 00:29:05,493 --> 00:29:09,830 There's an American legal student wants to see me. What time is Sir John due? 355 00:29:09,998 --> 00:29:12,666 - Half-past twelve, sir. - Right. 356 00:29:22,218 --> 00:29:24,303 Come in. 357 00:29:25,472 --> 00:29:27,848 - Hi. - How very nice to see you. 358 00:29:28,016 --> 00:29:30,392 - Am I interrupting? - Absolutely not. 359 00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:32,895 - Really? - No, really. Delighted to see you. 360 00:29:33,062 --> 00:29:34,980 Hello. 361 00:29:37,984 --> 00:29:41,195 So... this is the place, huh? 362 00:29:41,362 --> 00:29:43,822 - This is it. - Very nice. 363 00:29:43,990 --> 00:29:48,410 I was over at the courts this morning. Boy, it's fascinating! So much to know. 364 00:29:48,578 --> 00:29:51,038 Everybody wears these. Do you wear one? 365 00:29:51,247 --> 00:29:53,040 Ridiculous! 366 00:29:56,211 --> 00:30:00,130 Well, um, I only have a few minutes before... Sorry. 367 00:30:00,298 --> 00:30:04,176 - But till then, I'm all yours. - I just have a couple of questions. 368 00:30:04,344 --> 00:30:06,428 - Uh-huh. - Um... 369 00:30:07,555 --> 00:30:11,391 I'm having a problem understanding preliminary criminal procedures. 370 00:30:11,559 --> 00:30:13,227 Good. 371 00:30:13,394 --> 00:30:15,521 What exactly is the committal? 372 00:30:15,688 --> 00:30:20,567 Ah, interesting. Well, basically, it's a preliminary investigation 373 00:30:20,735 --> 00:30:25,405 where the prosecution presents evidence that the accused has a case to answer. 374 00:30:25,573 --> 00:30:28,700 That's what the books say. Let's take, for example... 375 00:30:28,868 --> 00:30:31,411 - my friend George Thomason. - Right. 376 00:30:31,579 --> 00:30:33,372 Now, when he goes into his committal... 377 00:30:33,540 --> 00:30:35,415 Thomason? 378 00:30:35,583 --> 00:30:37,960 - Yes. - George Thomason? 379 00:30:39,045 --> 00:30:40,754 Yes. Do you know him? 380 00:30:42,715 --> 00:30:45,717 - I'm defending him. - What are you talking about? 381 00:30:45,885 --> 00:30:48,095 I'm his barrister. His lawyer. 382 00:30:49,806 --> 00:30:51,890 That's so great! 383 00:30:52,851 --> 00:30:55,561 That's so weird, though. Isn't that weird? 384 00:30:55,728 --> 00:30:58,230 I'm so happy it's you that's defending him. 385 00:30:58,398 --> 00:31:01,400 - Thank you. - He's sure to get off now. 386 00:31:02,735 --> 00:31:05,904 Wow! Well, I can watch you work now. 387 00:31:06,072 --> 00:31:07,990 Please. 388 00:31:10,285 --> 00:31:16,290 Amazing. Well, anyway, at the committal George would then plead...? 389 00:31:16,457 --> 00:31:18,625 - Not guilty. - Really? 390 00:31:18,793 --> 00:31:21,795 Oh, yes. The evidence is largely circumstantial. 391 00:31:21,963 --> 00:31:24,339 There was an identification, wasn't there? 392 00:31:24,507 --> 00:31:28,635 Ah, true. But a very elderly lady. I think they've got the wrong man. 393 00:31:30,471 --> 00:31:33,056 - You don't think he did it? - No. 394 00:31:34,601 --> 00:31:38,103 Let's say, for argument's sake, that you did think he did it. 395 00:31:38,271 --> 00:31:41,773 Sure. If further evidence against him came to light, for example. 396 00:31:41,941 --> 00:31:46,028 Right, right. You would then advise him to plead guilty, 397 00:31:46,195 --> 00:31:49,781 and turn over the jewels to get his sentence cut. 398 00:31:49,949 --> 00:31:53,076 And he would turn them over to who? To you? 399 00:31:54,996 --> 00:31:56,914 - Theoretically? - Oh, of course. 400 00:31:57,081 --> 00:31:59,166 Um... Well, er... 401 00:32:00,585 --> 00:32:03,754 I'm so sorry, I've forgotten your name. 402 00:32:05,882 --> 00:32:08,842 - Wanda. - Wanda! What a fool, what a fool. 403 00:32:09,010 --> 00:32:11,470 Well, Wanda, there are really three... 404 00:32:15,975 --> 00:32:18,518 Not Wanda Gershwitz? 405 00:32:18,686 --> 00:32:21,563 - Yes. - Oh, my God. 406 00:32:22,190 --> 00:32:24,900 - What? - You're his alibi. 407 00:32:25,068 --> 00:32:27,277 - I can't talk to you. - Why not? 408 00:32:27,445 --> 00:32:32,407 My dear lady, you are a defense witness. I must ask you to leave immediately. 409 00:32:32,575 --> 00:32:33,909 What did I say? 410 00:32:34,077 --> 00:32:36,745 It's not ethical for me to talk to a witness. 411 00:32:37,288 --> 00:32:40,582 - Everybody does it in America. - Not in England. It's forbidden. 412 00:32:40,750 --> 00:32:45,545 I must insist, otherwise I may have to give up the case. I'm sorry. Please? 413 00:32:50,301 --> 00:32:52,219 Oh, Archie. 414 00:32:54,097 --> 00:32:58,684 I didn't come here today to talk about boring criminal procedures. 415 00:33:00,395 --> 00:33:03,271 Come on, you know. 416 00:33:03,439 --> 00:33:05,941 You knew the minute I walked in here. 417 00:33:07,902 --> 00:33:09,611 I want you. 418 00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:14,032 What? 419 00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:15,909 (intercom) 420 00:33:16,077 --> 00:33:17,661 - Hello? - Sir John is here. 421 00:33:17,829 --> 00:33:20,414 - Show him in. - I want you to make love with me. 422 00:33:20,581 --> 00:33:22,249 - Pardon? - Nothing. 423 00:33:22,417 --> 00:33:25,585 - Will you take me to bed, Archie? - No. Sorry. 424 00:33:28,589 --> 00:33:30,465 Bye, Uncle. 425 00:33:34,137 --> 00:33:35,762 Hi! 426 00:33:46,566 --> 00:33:50,235 (# Rossini's "Il Barbiere di Siviglia" playing in background) 427 00:33:52,947 --> 00:33:57,117 He's pleading not guilty, so you're safe until the trial. 428 00:33:58,536 --> 00:34:00,954 Leach doesn't think he did it. 429 00:34:02,331 --> 00:34:07,085 Ken says there's a safe deposit box key, but only George knows where it is. 430 00:34:08,379 --> 00:34:10,464 Thank you, Wanda! 431 00:34:14,135 --> 00:34:17,179 - What have you found out? - Not a lot. 432 00:34:17,346 --> 00:34:20,557 - You realize he's in court tomorrow? - I know. I know that! 433 00:34:20,725 --> 00:34:23,602 - So nothing, huh? - Nix. 434 00:34:23,770 --> 00:34:25,771 Zip. 435 00:34:25,938 --> 00:34:26,938 Diddly. 436 00:34:27,106 --> 00:34:29,066 Bupkas. 437 00:34:30,985 --> 00:34:32,069 Niente. 438 00:34:37,033 --> 00:34:39,367 - Oh, it's too big! - No, it isn't, Portia. 439 00:34:39,535 --> 00:34:41,578 - It is. It's enormous! - No, it isn't. 440 00:34:41,746 --> 00:34:44,623 - Oh, please, Mother! - No. Absolutely not. 441 00:34:44,791 --> 00:34:46,958 I'm so miserable and you just don't care! 442 00:34:47,126 --> 00:34:49,169 Do shut up, Portia! 443 00:34:50,004 --> 00:34:53,590 All I get all day is people complaining to me. 444 00:34:53,758 --> 00:34:55,258 Oh, dear. 445 00:35:03,309 --> 00:35:05,185 Ecco l'uomo. 446 00:35:21,452 --> 00:35:25,288 Ooh, le due cupole grandi della cattedrale di Milano. 447 00:36:10,418 --> 00:36:12,544 Benito Mussolini! 448 00:36:25,933 --> 00:36:27,976 Dov'e il Vaticano? 449 00:36:30,354 --> 00:36:32,814 Oh, ecco Roma. 450 00:36:42,491 --> 00:36:44,618 # Volare 451 00:36:44,785 --> 00:36:46,411 # Oh-oh 452 00:36:46,579 --> 00:36:49,497 # E cantare, oh... 453 00:37:01,427 --> 00:37:05,180 Archie, I want you to speak to her about plastic surgery. 454 00:37:06,140 --> 00:37:08,391 - Hm? - Do listen. 455 00:37:08,559 --> 00:37:09,768 I want you to speak to Portia. 456 00:37:09,936 --> 00:37:12,479 Right. I'll have a word with her in the morning. 457 00:37:12,647 --> 00:37:17,484 Good night, Archie. 458 00:37:17,652 --> 00:37:19,778 Good night, Wanda. 459 00:37:20,071 --> 00:37:22,155 Good night, who? 460 00:37:23,115 --> 00:37:25,116 Oh, sorry, darling. Just a stupid case 461 00:37:25,284 --> 00:37:28,203 I've got tomorrow with some lousy old hag. 462 00:37:29,163 --> 00:37:31,665 Are you George Francis Thomason 463 00:37:31,832 --> 00:37:35,502 of Kipling Mansions, Murray Avenue, London, W9? 464 00:37:37,922 --> 00:37:40,840 - Yes, sir. - The charge is one of armed robbery. 465 00:37:41,008 --> 00:37:44,302 Sit down, Mr. Thomason. Are we ready for a committal claim? 466 00:37:44,470 --> 00:37:47,681 Yes. It will be under Section 6.2, madam. 467 00:37:47,848 --> 00:37:49,099 That is correct, 6.2. 468 00:37:49,267 --> 00:37:53,061 Here are the statements. All to be fully bound, please. 469 00:37:54,647 --> 00:37:56,731 Stand up then, Mr. Thomason. 470 00:37:56,899 --> 00:38:01,194 You are committed to stand trial at the Central Criminal Court. 471 00:38:01,362 --> 00:38:03,697 There is some urgency about this case, madam, 472 00:38:03,864 --> 00:38:07,200 as the main witness, Mrs. Eileen Coady, is elderly 473 00:38:07,368 --> 00:38:10,870 and has had serious heart difficulties recently. 474 00:38:11,038 --> 00:38:15,750 Is there any possibility that this case might be put down for an early trial? 475 00:38:16,210 --> 00:38:19,587 (clerk) That will be for the listing office at the Old Bailey. 476 00:38:19,755 --> 00:38:22,882 - Take him down to the cell, officer. - Yes, sir. 477 00:38:41,569 --> 00:38:45,572 Hi, hon. How you doin'? Ooh, you look great. I love your hair. 478 00:38:45,740 --> 00:38:47,657 - Time for a coffee? - No. I've g-g-g... 479 00:38:47,825 --> 00:38:50,660 Have you thought about it? Why did he give you this? 480 00:38:50,828 --> 00:38:53,747 "Eileen Coady. 69 Basil Street." 481 00:38:53,914 --> 00:38:57,208 What does he want you to do? Send her flowers? Do her shopping? 482 00:38:57,376 --> 00:39:00,462 Show her a good time? Rub her out? T... 483 00:39:03,591 --> 00:39:05,508 He wants you to rub her out? 484 00:39:05,676 --> 00:39:07,427 Er... 485 00:39:07,595 --> 00:39:09,804 He's going to kill her! 486 00:39:12,475 --> 00:39:14,768 Fuck off, or I'll kill you. 487 00:39:14,935 --> 00:39:16,978 Limey fruits! 488 00:39:18,689 --> 00:39:22,442 So the old lady's gonna m-m-meet with an accident, eh, K-K-Ken? 489 00:39:22,693 --> 00:39:24,778 - Shh! - (Otto laughs) 490 00:39:25,946 --> 00:39:26,946 What's so funny? 491 00:39:27,114 --> 00:39:30,450 It's just that wasting old ladies isn't nice! 492 00:39:30,785 --> 00:39:33,953 Well, it's better than b-b-buggering people. 493 00:39:34,705 --> 00:39:37,332 I bet you a pound you don't kill her. 494 00:39:38,751 --> 00:39:40,835 - All right. - All right. 495 00:39:41,962 --> 00:39:46,174 I love watching your ass when you walk. Is that beautiful or what?! 496 00:39:47,760 --> 00:39:50,887 Don't go near him! He's mine! 497 00:39:51,597 --> 00:39:53,848 A pound says you won't kill her! 498 00:39:54,016 --> 00:39:56,101 (Otto laughs) 499 00:39:57,311 --> 00:40:00,688 - So when could you look at it? - Let's think. Thursday's hopeless. 500 00:40:00,856 --> 00:40:02,941 My wife's going to the opera Friday. 501 00:40:03,109 --> 00:40:05,443 I could look at it then, call you on Saturday. 502 00:40:05,611 --> 00:40:08,029 - I'd appreciate that. Thanks. - Bye, Frank. 503 00:40:08,197 --> 00:40:10,031 Hi. 504 00:40:10,199 --> 00:40:13,326 I know we're not allowed to talk. Gimme a call. 505 00:40:13,494 --> 00:40:15,745 I can't! 506 00:40:15,913 --> 00:40:18,998 - Please? - We're not allowed to speak. 507 00:40:19,166 --> 00:40:21,626 We don't have to. 508 00:40:21,794 --> 00:40:24,462 I don't want you for your conversation. 509 00:40:28,717 --> 00:40:30,718 I'd love to, but... 510 00:40:34,223 --> 00:40:36,474 (Wanda wails) 511 00:40:42,648 --> 00:40:44,899 - What happened? - Got a date Friday. 512 00:40:46,026 --> 00:40:48,528 (Ken whistles) 513 00:40:59,665 --> 00:41:01,374 (dogs yap) 514 00:41:01,542 --> 00:41:05,545 Look here! Do you mind not making that terrible noise? 515 00:41:05,713 --> 00:41:08,506 My dogs will be having their nap. 516 00:41:08,674 --> 00:41:11,050 Nice doggy. Nice d-doggy. 517 00:41:11,218 --> 00:41:13,344 (dog snarls and yaps) 518 00:41:30,112 --> 00:41:32,614 Otto, what are you doing? 519 00:41:32,781 --> 00:41:36,409 It's a Buddhist meditation technique. Focuses your aggression. 520 00:41:36,577 --> 00:41:41,039 - The monks used to do it before battle. - What kind of Buddhism is this, Otto? 521 00:41:42,917 --> 00:41:44,542 (horn) 522 00:41:45,294 --> 00:41:47,420 - (crash) - Asshole! 523 00:41:48,422 --> 00:41:52,091 It's an early Tantric meditation. What is this? 524 00:41:52,259 --> 00:41:56,095 In order to get information, I just might have to get friendly with him. 525 00:41:57,014 --> 00:41:59,182 Well, we're ready now, at last. 526 00:41:59,350 --> 00:42:01,184 Oh, good. Well, enjoy the opera, darling. 527 00:42:01,352 --> 00:42:03,895 - Your supper's in the fridge. - Marvelous. 528 00:42:04,063 --> 00:42:06,147 Be good. 529 00:42:06,857 --> 00:42:09,859 When you say "friendly," what are we talking about here? 530 00:42:10,027 --> 00:42:13,029 Cordial? Courteous? Supportive? What? 531 00:42:13,197 --> 00:42:16,282 I don't know. Let's just see what happens. 532 00:42:17,952 --> 00:42:22,288 So, "friendly" might include actual, uh, what? Penetration? 533 00:42:22,456 --> 00:42:24,749 - I don't need your jealousy now. - Jealousy? 534 00:42:24,917 --> 00:42:27,627 - Yes. - Hey, I'm merely curious. 535 00:42:27,795 --> 00:42:30,421 Me, jealous of that fop? 536 00:42:38,305 --> 00:42:41,641 - What about my tits? - Does he get to handle them? 537 00:42:41,809 --> 00:42:44,978 Yes. That's my forecast. I'll stand by that. 538 00:42:45,145 --> 00:42:48,147 - Nuzzling? - I think $20 million is worth nuzzling. 539 00:42:48,315 --> 00:42:50,608 Eighty percent chance there. 540 00:42:50,776 --> 00:42:52,360 - Sucking? - I thought you weren't jealous. 541 00:42:52,528 --> 00:42:55,947 I'm not! I don't believe in jealousy. It's for the weak. 542 00:42:56,115 --> 00:43:00,034 One thing, though. Touch his dick and he's dead! 543 00:43:05,916 --> 00:43:08,167 I told your father to get the car serviced. 544 00:43:08,335 --> 00:43:11,129 - Aren't we going, then? - Oh, do shut up, Portia. 545 00:43:24,018 --> 00:43:26,060 (whispers) Hurry up. 546 00:43:41,702 --> 00:43:43,119 Hi. 547 00:43:45,039 --> 00:43:46,831 Do you despise me? 548 00:43:51,712 --> 00:43:54,088 No. That's not a word that leaps to mind. 549 00:43:55,341 --> 00:43:57,425 Can I stay, then? 550 00:44:02,264 --> 00:44:05,183 Of course. Look... Wanda... 551 00:44:05,351 --> 00:44:09,103 - I know. Your wife's coming back. - No, no. It's not her. 552 00:44:09,271 --> 00:44:11,564 She'll be gone for hours. It's about what I said to you. 553 00:44:12,274 --> 00:44:15,151 - It is all right for us to speak. - It is? 554 00:44:15,319 --> 00:44:18,112 Provided that we don't discuss the case. 555 00:44:19,198 --> 00:44:22,075 Oh. Oh, fine. 556 00:44:22,242 --> 00:44:24,744 It's just that if anyone saw us talking... 557 00:44:24,912 --> 00:44:26,412 Oh, but they won't. 558 00:44:33,921 --> 00:44:36,881 Sorry if I seem... pompous. 559 00:44:37,049 --> 00:44:39,467 Oh, you're the best, Archie. 560 00:44:44,264 --> 00:44:45,431 No. 561 00:44:45,599 --> 00:44:48,267 Not yet. I'm thirsty. 562 00:44:51,939 --> 00:44:53,106 What shall I get you? 563 00:44:54,775 --> 00:44:57,151 Whisky. 564 00:45:00,823 --> 00:45:05,952 You are the sexiest, most beautiful girl I have ever seen... 565 00:45:07,121 --> 00:45:09,497 ...in my entire life. 566 00:45:12,292 --> 00:45:14,377 Get me my drink. 567 00:45:23,971 --> 00:45:26,055 (Wanda giggles) 568 00:45:34,314 --> 00:45:35,982 Oh! 569 00:45:36,150 --> 00:45:41,988 Oh, Archie. 570 00:45:46,994 --> 00:45:48,619 So... 571 00:45:49,288 --> 00:45:52,498 if George decides to change his plea, 572 00:45:52,666 --> 00:45:55,752 he'd tell you where the loot is first, wouldn't he? 573 00:45:55,919 --> 00:45:57,754 Mm? 574 00:45:57,921 --> 00:46:00,381 Darling, we mustn't talk about the trial. 575 00:46:00,549 --> 00:46:03,384 I know. I just meant theoretically. 576 00:46:04,511 --> 00:46:06,637 Kiss me there. 577 00:46:07,514 --> 00:46:10,391 Oh, theoretically? Um... 578 00:46:11,018 --> 00:46:15,813 (mumbled) Well, if the defendant wants to change his plea 579 00:46:15,981 --> 00:46:19,192 and his instructions to his legal representative... 580 00:46:20,611 --> 00:46:23,112 ...the normal procedure... 581 00:46:28,410 --> 00:46:31,370 - What's the matter? - Oh, it's wonderful, Archie. 582 00:46:35,542 --> 00:46:37,543 - Ah! - What? What? 583 00:46:37,711 --> 00:46:40,755 You're getting me so hot! I need something to drink. 584 00:46:40,923 --> 00:46:44,175 - Yeah. - Something cold? Maybe in the fridge? 585 00:46:44,343 --> 00:46:47,011 - Champagne? - Oh, my favorite! 586 00:46:48,430 --> 00:46:50,515 Don't go away. 587 00:46:53,477 --> 00:46:55,728 Je reviens. 588 00:47:05,155 --> 00:47:07,240 - What are you doing here? - Relax. 589 00:47:07,407 --> 00:47:10,117 - Get the fuck out! - I heard moaning. I was worried. 590 00:47:10,285 --> 00:47:12,119 I was faking it, you stupid jerk! 591 00:47:12,287 --> 00:47:14,497 Don't call me stupid. And I'm not jealous. 592 00:47:14,665 --> 00:47:16,749 - Then leave! - OK! 593 00:47:18,585 --> 00:47:20,670 Nice place. 594 00:47:21,380 --> 00:47:23,798 Don't touch his dick. 595 00:47:25,592 --> 00:47:27,677 His wife, his wife! 596 00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:32,181 Now for goodness sake, get off to bed. 597 00:47:37,062 --> 00:47:39,480 God! There isn't any ice. 598 00:47:48,740 --> 00:47:50,283 Champagne. 599 00:47:50,784 --> 00:47:53,286 - (yells) - What's the matter? 600 00:47:55,289 --> 00:47:57,331 What are you doing? 601 00:47:58,876 --> 00:48:03,045 Champagne, dear. To welcome you home. Um, let me pour you a glass. 602 00:48:04,923 --> 00:48:06,799 Whose is the car? 603 00:48:06,967 --> 00:48:09,302 - Car? - Blocking the drive. 604 00:48:09,720 --> 00:48:12,471 There you are, dear. Cheers. Nice to see you again. 605 00:48:12,639 --> 00:48:16,183 - How was the opera? Finished early? - Whose car is it? 606 00:48:16,810 --> 00:48:19,604 Mine. It's a beauty, isn't it? 607 00:48:19,771 --> 00:48:22,189 Where'd I leave my drink, Archie? Ah! 608 00:48:24,401 --> 00:48:27,403 - Who is this? - Don't you know? 609 00:48:27,571 --> 00:48:31,532 How do you do, Mrs. Leach? I'm Harvey Manfren... jensen. 610 00:48:31,700 --> 00:48:34,535 - I'm, uh, with the CIA. - The CIA? 611 00:48:34,703 --> 00:48:36,621 That's correct, ma'am. 612 00:48:36,788 --> 00:48:39,040 I was, uh, just telling your husband here, 613 00:48:39,207 --> 00:48:43,044 before I, uh, had to go to your beautiful bathroom, 614 00:48:43,211 --> 00:48:47,632 we've got a high-ranking KGB defector in a safe house near here. 615 00:48:47,799 --> 00:48:51,010 We're debriefing him as of now and just... 616 00:48:51,845 --> 00:48:53,554 ...checking houses in the neighborhood. 617 00:48:53,722 --> 00:48:55,681 - For what? - For KGB. 618 00:48:55,849 --> 00:48:59,894 - Is there any danger? - No, no, no, no. No, uh... 619 00:49:00,062 --> 00:49:02,688 No. No, not now. We, uh... 620 00:49:03,106 --> 00:49:05,483 We just wanna keep everyone informed. 621 00:49:05,651 --> 00:49:09,236 So, Archie, thanks for the drink. Sorry to have troubled you. 622 00:49:09,404 --> 00:49:11,822 Keep everyone informed? 623 00:49:11,990 --> 00:49:15,201 - So there's no panic, ma'am. - But isn't it a secret? 624 00:49:15,369 --> 00:49:18,663 - You have no idea how secret. - Why are you telling everyone? 625 00:49:20,290 --> 00:49:23,042 - It's a smoke screen? - What?! 626 00:49:23,335 --> 00:49:25,044 Double bluff. 627 00:49:25,212 --> 00:49:28,005 Look, you know nothing about intelligence work. 628 00:49:28,173 --> 00:49:30,716 It's an XK Red 27 technique. 629 00:49:30,884 --> 00:49:34,136 My father was in the secret service, Mr. Manfredjin St. John, 630 00:49:34,304 --> 00:49:37,348 and I know that you don't keep the public informed 631 00:49:37,516 --> 00:49:41,185 when you are debriefing KGB defectors in a safe house. 632 00:49:41,353 --> 00:49:42,561 You don't, huh? 633 00:49:42,729 --> 00:49:46,941 Not unless you're congenitally insane or irretrievably stupid, no. 634 00:49:48,485 --> 00:49:51,696 - Don't call me stupid. - Why on earth not? 635 00:49:52,739 --> 00:49:57,785 Oh, you English are so superior, aren't you? 636 00:49:57,953 --> 00:50:02,206 Would you like to know where you'd be without us, the US of A, to protect you? 637 00:50:02,374 --> 00:50:05,584 I'll tell you. The smallest fucking province 638 00:50:05,752 --> 00:50:07,753 in the Russian Empire, that's what! 639 00:50:07,921 --> 00:50:10,715 So don't call me stupid, lady. Just thank me! 640 00:50:10,882 --> 00:50:13,467 Thank you for popping in and protecting us! 641 00:50:13,635 --> 00:50:16,595 If it wasn't for us, you'd all be speaking German! Singing: 642 00:50:16,763 --> 00:50:20,558 # Deutschland, Deutschland uber alles 643 00:50:20,726 --> 00:50:23,936 That's my brother. Get rid of your wife and get my necklace. 644 00:50:24,104 --> 00:50:26,355 Necklace. Right. I'll think of something. 645 00:50:26,523 --> 00:50:28,983 - Who are you talking to? - Myself. 646 00:50:29,151 --> 00:50:32,778 - Well, who was that shouting? - The brother of a f-friend of mine. 647 00:50:32,946 --> 00:50:34,864 Archie, who on earth? 648 00:50:35,032 --> 00:50:36,949 I don't know. He rang the bell and I... 649 00:50:37,117 --> 00:50:39,326 - I need a drink. - Let's go to the pub. 650 00:50:39,494 --> 00:50:41,328 - What? - Let's go to the pub. 651 00:50:41,496 --> 00:50:44,373 - Would you like to? - We haven't been for 15 years! 652 00:50:44,541 --> 00:50:46,208 Be rather nice for Portia to see it now. 653 00:50:46,376 --> 00:50:48,335 - Honestly! - (Archie screams) 654 00:50:48,503 --> 00:50:52,006 - What on earth is the matter? - I thought the picture was falling. 655 00:50:52,174 --> 00:50:55,134 - Will you pull yourself together? - It's secure now. 656 00:50:55,302 --> 00:50:59,138 - What's this? - Thanks, Portia. OK. Coming with us? 657 00:50:59,306 --> 00:51:01,348 - What was that? - A necklace. 658 00:51:01,516 --> 00:51:04,018 - What's going on? - Nothing. Right, let's go. 659 00:51:04,186 --> 00:51:06,062 - Can I see that? - What? 660 00:51:06,229 --> 00:51:07,980 In your hand. 661 00:51:08,148 --> 00:51:09,857 Your other hand. 662 00:51:10,025 --> 00:51:11,650 (tuts) 663 00:51:11,818 --> 00:51:15,362 Portia, go to your room. I can explain. I left some papers... 664 00:51:15,530 --> 00:51:18,240 - Now! They sent a new girl. - Oh, Archie. 665 00:51:18,408 --> 00:51:22,828 - No, really. She's Canadian. - It's lovely. Thank you. 666 00:51:26,541 --> 00:51:28,793 Oh, it's even got a W for Wendy. 667 00:51:28,960 --> 00:51:32,546 Oh, I'm so glad you like it, darling. 668 00:51:32,714 --> 00:51:36,050 It's the most beautiful thing you've ever given me. 669 00:51:40,013 --> 00:51:42,807 Oh, Archie! This isn't like you. 670 00:51:51,441 --> 00:51:53,859 Are you fucking crazy?! 671 00:51:54,820 --> 00:51:58,155 - Hey, I saved your ass. - I had him right where I wanted him! 672 00:51:58,323 --> 00:52:01,242 - Hey... - I give you one thing to do, Otto! 673 00:52:01,409 --> 00:52:04,120 You're supposed to drive me and shut up! 674 00:52:05,205 --> 00:52:07,289 (car drives away) 675 00:52:09,876 --> 00:52:12,002 (phone rings) 676 00:52:14,714 --> 00:52:16,799 Hello? 677 00:52:16,967 --> 00:52:19,051 Hold on. It's for you. 678 00:52:21,721 --> 00:52:23,430 Hello? 679 00:52:25,433 --> 00:52:28,060 Er, not at the moment, no. 680 00:52:31,022 --> 00:52:35,192 Yes, well, I'm not quite sure when I'll be able to get hold of that. 681 00:52:35,819 --> 00:52:39,989 Yes, yes. I do appreciate that. Yes, as soon as possible. 682 00:52:41,825 --> 00:52:44,702 Well, that would be very nice, obviously. 683 00:52:44,870 --> 00:52:47,663 So, um, see you soon, I hope. 684 00:52:47,831 --> 00:52:49,165 Bye, Frank. 685 00:52:50,000 --> 00:52:51,500 (dog snarling) 686 00:52:53,253 --> 00:52:56,297 Calm down. Calm down! Easy, g-g-girl. 687 00:52:56,464 --> 00:52:58,591 Easy. Easy. 688 00:53:02,637 --> 00:53:06,557 Come here. 689 00:53:06,725 --> 00:53:09,768 Smell. Smell. Smell, Maggie. Smell. 690 00:53:11,104 --> 00:53:13,355 Now, k-k-kill! 691 00:53:15,567 --> 00:53:16,609 Kill! 692 00:53:17,319 --> 00:53:19,278 - Kill! - (dog growls) 693 00:53:19,446 --> 00:53:20,487 Kill! 694 00:53:39,007 --> 00:53:41,258 (bell tolls) 695 00:53:44,012 --> 00:53:47,431 We therefore commit its body to the ground; 696 00:53:47,599 --> 00:53:50,851 earth to earth, ashes to ashes, 697 00:53:51,019 --> 00:53:52,937 dust to dust... 698 00:53:53,104 --> 00:54:04,323 # Miserere domine 699 00:54:04,491 --> 00:54:08,244 # Canis mortuus est 700 00:54:10,664 --> 00:54:13,582 Hello, honey. What happened? 701 00:54:14,501 --> 00:54:16,669 - N-n-nothing. - What's that? 702 00:54:16,836 --> 00:54:19,004 - Er... - Not Granny? 703 00:54:19,172 --> 00:54:21,674 Er, not yet, n-n-no. 704 00:54:21,841 --> 00:54:23,801 - Who's it for, then? - Af-f-f... 705 00:54:23,969 --> 00:54:26,971 A fish? Frenchman? A phone operator? 706 00:54:27,138 --> 00:54:30,516 - Friend. - Oh! A four-legged one? 707 00:54:30,684 --> 00:54:33,435 - Where's my sister? - She's in the b-b-b... 708 00:54:33,603 --> 00:54:36,063 - Thank you. - Lavatory. 709 00:54:36,231 --> 00:54:37,982 Wanda. 710 00:54:39,442 --> 00:54:42,361 - (quietly) Anything? - What? No. 711 00:54:42,529 --> 00:54:46,031 - (loudly) Why are you here? - I'm here because I'm bored! 712 00:54:46,199 --> 00:54:51,370 Bored, wandering around this God-awful city, shoving George's ugly pic... 713 00:54:51,871 --> 00:54:55,582 Talking to stuck-up, intellectually inferior British faggots. 714 00:54:55,750 --> 00:54:57,543 Jesus, they're uptight. 715 00:54:57,711 --> 00:55:01,380 They get rigor mortis in the prime of life in this country. 716 00:55:01,548 --> 00:55:04,717 Standing there with their hair clenched, just... 717 00:55:06,177 --> 00:55:08,262 ...counting the seconds till the weekend, 718 00:55:08,430 --> 00:55:10,556 so that they can dress up like ballerinas 719 00:55:10,724 --> 00:55:14,226 and whip themselves into a frenzy at the flat at four... 720 00:55:14,394 --> 00:55:16,228 2B, St.... 721 00:55:17,063 --> 00:55:20,441 To be... honest, I, uh, hate them. 722 00:55:21,109 --> 00:55:24,737 I mean, pretending they're so fucking lawyer... 723 00:55:25,238 --> 00:55:29,408 Uh, superior. So fucking superior, with those phony accents. 724 00:55:30,160 --> 00:55:34,580 Not you, Ken. You've got a beautiful speaking voice. When it works. 725 00:55:34,748 --> 00:55:36,665 Son of a bitch! 726 00:55:42,005 --> 00:55:45,507 (loudly) Wanna have some lunch? (quietly) Have you heard from him? 727 00:55:45,675 --> 00:55:47,634 - Who? - Archie. 728 00:55:47,802 --> 00:55:50,596 (loudly) No. I have to finish my hair. (quietly) No. 729 00:55:50,764 --> 00:55:53,640 (quietly) Nothing? (loudly) OK. Well, I'm outta here! 730 00:55:53,808 --> 00:55:55,601 (quietly) No plans to see him? 731 00:55:55,769 --> 00:55:58,062 (quietly) No. (loudly) OK, bye, bro. 732 00:55:58,229 --> 00:56:00,356 Bye, Wanda! 733 00:56:02,776 --> 00:56:04,818 Oh, sorry. 734 00:56:07,197 --> 00:56:10,324 - What?! - An old lady wanted it engraved, 735 00:56:10,492 --> 00:56:14,203 and she's dying, and somebody put it in the display cabinet... 736 00:56:14,371 --> 00:56:16,455 - That's their problem. - Not legally. 737 00:56:16,623 --> 00:56:18,916 - You paid for it! - They accept their mistake. 738 00:56:19,084 --> 00:56:22,044 That's why they're offering you this to replace it. 739 00:56:22,212 --> 00:56:24,880 This is the nicest thing you've ever given me, 740 00:56:25,048 --> 00:56:26,673 and you want me to replace it with something awful... 741 00:56:26,841 --> 00:56:28,759 - I don't want... - They can't have it. 742 00:56:28,927 --> 00:56:30,135 - Wendy. - No. 743 00:56:30,303 --> 00:56:34,139 - Wendy! - No! Tell them they can't have it! 744 00:56:34,307 --> 00:56:36,725 You're the bloody barrister! 745 00:57:10,510 --> 00:57:11,969 - Hello. - Hello. 746 00:57:13,847 --> 00:57:16,807 Oh, Archie, it's beautiful. 747 00:57:16,975 --> 00:57:19,226 It's just beautiful. 748 00:57:21,604 --> 00:57:23,647 Oh, my God! Look! 749 00:57:25,275 --> 00:57:27,359 Oh, Archie, it's beautiful. 750 00:57:27,527 --> 00:57:29,820 Isn't it wonderful? 751 00:57:29,988 --> 00:57:32,698 - Whose is it? - Belongs to someone at the chambers. 752 00:57:32,866 --> 00:57:34,366 And where are they? 753 00:57:35,577 --> 00:57:37,077 Hong Kong. 754 00:57:37,245 --> 00:57:38,787 Ah, so. 755 00:57:38,955 --> 00:57:40,956 Gone for weeks. 756 00:57:41,124 --> 00:57:43,208 Nice rug, Archie. 757 00:57:44,961 --> 00:57:47,045 May I? 758 00:57:48,006 --> 00:57:50,090 What?! Archie, what are you doing? 759 00:57:50,258 --> 00:57:52,342 The polka, I think. 760 00:57:56,139 --> 00:57:59,224 - You make me feel free! - Free? 761 00:57:59,976 --> 00:58:04,480 Wanda, do you have any idea what it's like being English? 762 00:58:04,731 --> 00:58:07,399 Being so correct all the time? Being so... 763 00:58:07,567 --> 00:58:11,862 stifled by this dread of doing the wrong thing? 764 00:58:12,197 --> 00:58:13,697 Of saying to someone "Are you married?" 765 00:58:13,865 --> 00:58:16,366 And hearing "My wife left me this morning?" 766 00:58:16,534 --> 00:58:18,827 Or saying... "Do you have children?" 767 00:58:18,995 --> 00:58:22,748 and being told they all burned to death on Wednesday? 768 00:58:22,916 --> 00:58:27,544 You see, Wanda, we're all... terrified of embarrassment. 769 00:58:27,712 --> 00:58:30,797 That's why we're so... dead. 770 00:58:32,342 --> 00:58:33,550 Most of my friends are dead. 771 00:58:33,718 --> 00:58:36,094 You know, we have these piles of corpses to dinner. 772 00:58:37,722 --> 00:58:39,806 But you're alive, God bless you. 773 00:58:39,974 --> 00:58:42,601 And I wanna be. I'm so fed up with all this! 774 00:58:44,771 --> 00:58:47,606 I wanna make love with you, Wanda. 775 00:58:47,774 --> 00:58:49,483 I'm a good lover. At least... 776 00:58:50,610 --> 00:58:53,070 ...used to be, back in the early 14th century. 777 00:58:54,405 --> 00:58:55,864 Can we go to bed? 778 00:59:02,205 --> 00:59:03,288 Yeah. 779 00:59:04,916 --> 00:59:07,042 Hang on! Mind your head. 780 00:59:14,968 --> 00:59:17,219 I think I love you, Wanda. 781 00:59:17,387 --> 00:59:21,431 Oh, Archie. Can I ask you a question? 782 00:59:21,599 --> 00:59:24,560 - Anything. - Where's my locket? 783 00:59:25,395 --> 00:59:27,271 - I couldn't get it. - What? 784 00:59:27,438 --> 00:59:30,983 Wendy wouldn't give it back. Look, I got you this instead. 785 00:59:31,985 --> 00:59:36,446 - Do you like it? - No, Archie. I have to have mine. 786 00:59:36,614 --> 00:59:39,241 What's the matter? Why? 787 00:59:40,326 --> 00:59:42,911 My mother gave it to me... 788 00:59:43,788 --> 00:59:47,374 ...on her death... bed. 789 00:59:48,710 --> 00:59:52,671 Oh, I'm sorry. All right, darling. I'll... I'll get it for you. 790 00:59:52,839 --> 00:59:55,674 - You promise? - I'll think of something. 791 00:59:55,842 --> 01:00:01,221 Sex is very, very difficult for me with somebody that I don't trust completely. 792 01:00:02,223 --> 01:00:04,683 I promise I'll get it. OK? 793 01:00:05,351 --> 01:00:08,145 Oh, I love you, Archie. 794 01:00:09,439 --> 01:00:13,150 I have loved you ever since the first second I saw you. 795 01:00:13,985 --> 01:00:15,402 (thud) 796 01:00:16,154 --> 01:00:18,196 - What was that? - What? 797 01:00:19,782 --> 01:00:21,867 Your brother didn't bring you, did he? 798 01:00:22,035 --> 01:00:23,869 No. 799 01:00:24,037 --> 01:00:26,079 He's no idea? 800 01:00:26,247 --> 01:00:29,041 - He doesn't have a clue. - What? 801 01:00:30,376 --> 01:00:32,294 - He is so dumb. - Really? 802 01:00:32,462 --> 01:00:36,632 He thought that the Gettysburg Address was where Lincoln lived. 803 01:00:39,802 --> 01:00:44,097 Oh, those terrible lies he told about the CIA! 804 01:00:44,265 --> 01:00:45,766 So painful! 805 01:00:45,933 --> 01:00:48,477 And when he heard your daughter's called Portia, 806 01:00:48,645 --> 01:00:51,855 he said "Why did they name her after a car?" 807 01:00:52,023 --> 01:00:54,066 (Archie guffaws) 808 01:00:56,402 --> 01:00:59,029 I love the way you laugh. 809 01:00:59,197 --> 01:01:01,615 I love you. You're funny. 810 01:01:03,076 --> 01:01:08,330 How come a girl as... bright as you could have a brother who's so... 811 01:01:08,498 --> 01:01:11,416 - Don't call me stupid. - (screaming) 812 01:01:11,584 --> 01:01:13,669 Jesus Christ! 813 01:01:14,754 --> 01:01:16,630 Argh! 814 01:01:17,090 --> 01:01:18,757 Come on! 815 01:01:19,676 --> 01:01:21,802 - Otto! Ouch! - Come on! 816 01:01:21,969 --> 01:01:24,054 - Otto! - Come on. 817 01:01:25,139 --> 01:01:27,599 I'll deal with you later! 818 01:01:28,393 --> 01:01:31,561 - What have you done with her? - She's all right. 819 01:01:31,729 --> 01:01:34,564 - (Wanda) Otto! - Now, apologize. 820 01:01:35,733 --> 01:01:37,234 What? 821 01:01:37,402 --> 01:01:38,944 Apologize. 822 01:01:39,987 --> 01:01:42,280 Are you totally deranged? 823 01:01:47,161 --> 01:01:49,454 You pompous, 824 01:01:49,622 --> 01:01:52,290 stuck-up, snot-nosed, 825 01:01:52,458 --> 01:01:54,960 English, giant-twerp, 826 01:01:55,128 --> 01:01:58,672 scumbag, fuck-face, dickhead asshole! 827 01:01:59,340 --> 01:02:03,301 How very interesting. You're a true vulgarian, aren't you? 828 01:02:03,469 --> 01:02:06,888 You're the vulgarian, you fuck! Now apologize! 829 01:02:08,141 --> 01:02:10,142 What? Me to you? 830 01:02:15,523 --> 01:02:17,274 Apologize. 831 01:02:17,442 --> 01:02:19,651 All right, all right. I apologize. 832 01:02:19,819 --> 01:02:22,279 - You're really sorry? - I'm really sorry. 833 01:02:22,447 --> 01:02:24,656 I apologize unreservedly. 834 01:02:25,366 --> 01:02:29,995 - You take it back? - I do. I offer a complete retraction. 835 01:02:30,163 --> 01:02:33,665 The imputation was totally without basis in fact, 836 01:02:33,833 --> 01:02:37,919 and was in no way fair comment, and was motivated purely by malice. 837 01:02:38,087 --> 01:02:42,841 I deeply regret any distress my comments may have caused you or your family. 838 01:02:43,384 --> 01:02:48,555 And I hereby undertake not to repeat any such slander at any time in the future. 839 01:02:51,350 --> 01:02:52,350 OK. 840 01:03:43,778 --> 01:03:45,111 (screams) 841 01:03:51,994 --> 01:03:54,246 (bell tolls) 842 01:03:54,413 --> 01:04:04,965 # Miserere domine 843 01:04:05,550 --> 01:04:09,678 # Canis mortuus est 844 01:04:10,429 --> 01:04:11,721 (Otto) You said you loved him! 845 01:04:11,889 --> 01:04:15,267 (Wanda) That's right! Here's a question for you. 846 01:04:15,434 --> 01:04:19,563 A: Wanda was lying. B: Wanda was telling the truth. 847 01:04:19,730 --> 01:04:22,065 Which one are you gonna pick? 848 01:04:22,233 --> 01:04:25,193 What was the first one? You said you weren't gonna see him! 849 01:04:25,361 --> 01:04:27,112 'Cause I knew you'd come along and fuck it up! 850 01:04:27,280 --> 01:04:29,865 I was dealing with something delicate. 851 01:04:30,032 --> 01:04:32,200 I'm setting up a guy who's important to us, 852 01:04:32,368 --> 01:04:35,620 who'll tell me where the loot is and if you'll be arrested, 853 01:04:35,788 --> 01:04:40,292 and you come loping in like Rambo and you dangle him out a fifth-floor window! 854 01:04:40,459 --> 01:04:42,460 Now, was that smart?! 855 01:04:42,628 --> 01:04:45,255 - OK. - Was it shrewd? Was it good tactics? 856 01:04:45,423 --> 01:04:47,465 Or was it stupid?! 857 01:04:48,968 --> 01:04:50,802 Don't call me stupid. 858 01:04:50,970 --> 01:04:55,348 Oh, right! To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people! 859 01:04:55,516 --> 01:04:59,769 I've known sheep that could outwit you. I've worn dresses with higher IQs. 860 01:04:59,937 --> 01:05:03,940 But you think you're an intellectual, don't you, ape? 861 01:05:04,108 --> 01:05:07,152 - Apes don't read philosophy. - Yes, they do, Otto. 862 01:05:07,320 --> 01:05:09,404 They just don't understand it. 863 01:05:09,572 --> 01:05:12,699 Now let me correct you on a couple of things, OK? 864 01:05:12,867 --> 01:05:15,410 Aristotle was not Belgian. 865 01:05:15,828 --> 01:05:20,123 The central message of Buddhism is not every man for himself. 866 01:05:20,291 --> 01:05:22,500 The London Underground is not a political movement. 867 01:05:22,668 --> 01:05:26,046 Those are all mistakes. I looked 'em up. 868 01:05:26,797 --> 01:05:29,382 Now... you have just assaulted 869 01:05:29,550 --> 01:05:33,094 the one man who can keep you out of jail and make you rich. 870 01:05:33,262 --> 01:05:35,513 So what are you gonna do about it, huh? 871 01:05:35,681 --> 01:05:38,516 What would an intellectual do? 872 01:05:38,684 --> 01:05:41,061 What would Plato do? 873 01:05:44,857 --> 01:05:47,192 - (mumbles) Apol... - Pardon me? 874 01:05:47,360 --> 01:05:49,486 - Apolo... - What? 875 01:05:50,363 --> 01:05:52,405 - Apologize! - Right! 876 01:05:54,116 --> 01:05:56,034 I'm sorry. 877 01:05:56,577 --> 01:06:00,455 No. Not to me, to Archie. 878 01:06:00,873 --> 01:06:03,500 And make it good, or we're dead. 879 01:06:09,590 --> 01:06:14,010 Oh, I'm so very, very, very, very s... 880 01:06:14,178 --> 01:06:16,262 Fuck you! 881 01:06:17,098 --> 01:06:18,807 I'm s... 882 01:06:18,975 --> 01:06:21,226 I'm very, very s... 883 01:06:21,394 --> 01:06:24,062 I'm so very s... 884 01:06:24,230 --> 01:06:26,898 Very, very, very s... 885 01:06:41,247 --> 01:06:43,039 Very, very... 886 01:06:43,207 --> 01:06:45,208 ssfff... 887 01:06:45,376 --> 01:06:47,419 (glass breaks) 888 01:07:56,322 --> 01:07:57,322 (thud) 889 01:07:57,490 --> 01:07:59,574 (Otto) Hello, Mr. Burglar! 890 01:07:59,742 --> 01:08:03,328 Going somewhere? Thought you could rob Mr. Leach, eh? 891 01:08:03,496 --> 01:08:07,415 I'm gonna teach you a lesson. He happens to be a good friend of mine. 892 01:08:07,583 --> 01:08:10,001 - Otto! - He's gonna be very pleased with me 893 01:08:10,169 --> 01:08:15,006 when he finds you all tied up and ready for the police. 894 01:08:17,009 --> 01:08:20,678 And don't call me Otto. To you, I am Mr.... 895 01:08:28,521 --> 01:08:30,105 Agh! 896 01:08:31,357 --> 01:08:32,607 Oh, God. 897 01:08:35,528 --> 01:08:38,029 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 898 01:08:38,197 --> 01:08:40,031 I'm sorry. 899 01:08:40,199 --> 01:08:42,283 Please. I'm sorry. 900 01:08:43,077 --> 01:08:44,994 I'm sorry. I didn't know it was you. 901 01:08:45,162 --> 01:08:46,913 How could I know it was you? 902 01:08:47,081 --> 01:08:50,125 I mean, how could you expect me to guess? 903 01:08:50,292 --> 01:08:55,421 Stupid jerk! I mean, what the fuck are you doing robbing your own house? 904 01:08:55,589 --> 01:08:59,801 You asshole! You stupid, stiff, pompous, English... 905 01:08:59,969 --> 01:09:01,719 Agh! 906 01:09:01,887 --> 01:09:04,055 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 907 01:09:04,765 --> 01:09:07,225 Uh... Uh... 908 01:09:07,601 --> 01:09:09,102 Yeah. 909 01:09:43,304 --> 01:09:46,014 (Wendy screams) 910 01:09:50,603 --> 01:09:53,104 God Almighty! 911 01:09:53,272 --> 01:09:55,190 Bloody hell! 912 01:10:02,615 --> 01:10:04,616 Darling! 913 01:10:04,783 --> 01:10:07,493 - Are you hurt? Speak to me! - (groans) 914 01:10:07,661 --> 01:10:10,163 - Are you hurt? - (groans) 915 01:10:10,456 --> 01:10:12,624 Can't you speak? Archie! 916 01:10:12,791 --> 01:10:15,919 - Archie, what has happened? - (coughs) 917 01:10:17,296 --> 01:10:19,797 Archie, we've been burgled. 918 01:10:19,965 --> 01:10:21,799 - Oh, no! - Well, are you hurt? 919 01:10:21,967 --> 01:10:24,302 No. I'm fine. Bit of a headache. 920 01:10:24,470 --> 01:10:29,057 I... I, er, I came in here, somebody hit me, tied me up... 921 01:10:29,225 --> 01:10:31,309 - God, is that the time? - What? 922 01:10:31,477 --> 01:10:33,895 Er, I didn't realize it was quite so late. 923 01:10:34,063 --> 01:10:36,272 - What?! - Er, I'm late for a conference. 924 01:10:36,440 --> 01:10:39,984 - A conference? You've been attacked! - It's nothing. I must fly. 925 01:10:40,152 --> 01:10:42,820 - Archie! - I'll help you tidy up when I get back. 926 01:10:42,988 --> 01:10:45,490 - Ah, hello, Portia. - What's happened? 927 01:10:46,367 --> 01:10:49,994 Your father has finally gone completely mental. 928 01:11:13,185 --> 01:11:15,061 Hi. 929 01:11:26,365 --> 01:11:28,241 Archie! 930 01:11:30,452 --> 01:11:32,829 - Thank you so much. - Champagne? 931 01:11:32,997 --> 01:11:34,872 OK. 932 01:11:37,293 --> 01:11:39,210 (cork pops) 933 01:11:57,563 --> 01:11:59,689 - To us. - To us. 934 01:12:02,401 --> 01:12:04,652 I went back to the house, and guess who... 935 01:12:04,820 --> 01:12:07,363 - (glass breaks) - Let's make love! 936 01:12:08,490 --> 01:12:10,783 Well, if you absolutely insist. 937 01:12:10,951 --> 01:12:12,577 - No. - What? 938 01:12:12,745 --> 01:12:14,829 Here. On the rug. 939 01:12:15,956 --> 01:12:17,832 I'll be right back. 940 01:12:18,000 --> 01:12:20,335 Get undressed. 941 01:12:20,502 --> 01:12:22,754 Why not? 942 01:12:22,921 --> 01:12:24,964 Why not indeed? 943 01:12:26,800 --> 01:12:28,676 Afterwards... 944 01:12:28,844 --> 01:12:32,138 - Yeah? - ...let's go to South America. 945 01:12:32,306 --> 01:12:35,767 - What? - Let's fly to South America. 946 01:12:35,934 --> 01:12:39,187 - Why South America? - OK. Iceland? 947 01:12:42,816 --> 01:12:45,777 What do you really want out of life, Wanda? 948 01:12:45,944 --> 01:12:49,113 - I don't know. - Why do I like you so much? 949 01:12:49,281 --> 01:12:51,449 - Archie? - Mm? 950 01:12:52,117 --> 01:12:54,786 - Do you speak Italian? - I am Italian! 951 01:12:54,953 --> 01:12:56,621 Sono italiano in spirito. 952 01:12:56,789 --> 01:13:00,666 Ma ho sposato una donna che preferisce lavorare nel giardino 953 01:13:00,834 --> 01:13:05,546 a far l'amore appassionato. Uno sbaglio grande! 954 01:13:05,714 --> 01:13:08,674 But it's such an ugly language. 955 01:13:08,842 --> 01:13:10,885 How about... Russian? 956 01:13:11,136 --> 01:13:15,306 Yest' sila blagodatnaya sozvuchiy slov zhivykh. 957 01:13:15,474 --> 01:13:16,474 (thud) 958 01:13:16,642 --> 01:13:22,605 Kamina tozhe ni trudnuyu tyesnitsya lyubosyat'sya grust'. 959 01:13:22,773 --> 01:13:28,152 Odnu molitvu chudnuyu tverzhdaya naizust'. 960 01:13:28,320 --> 01:13:33,950 V dushe kak bremya skatyatsya somneniya daleko. 961 01:13:34,118 --> 01:13:37,954 I varitsya i plachetsya, i tak legko... 962 01:13:38,122 --> 01:13:40,498 - Archie? - Yeah? 963 01:13:40,666 --> 01:13:43,334 - Are you rich? - No. No, I'm afraid not. 964 01:13:44,420 --> 01:13:46,963 - What about the house? - That's Wendy's. She's the rich one. 965 01:13:48,924 --> 01:13:50,508 Oh. 966 01:13:54,763 --> 01:13:58,349 Yest' sila blagodatnaya sozvuchiy slov zhivykh. 967 01:13:58,517 --> 01:14:03,855 I tushit nyeponyatnaya, svetlaya, prelyestnaya rech'. 968 01:14:04,022 --> 01:14:08,818 V dushe kak bremya skatyatsya somneniya daleko. 969 01:14:08,986 --> 01:14:13,865 I varitsya i plachetsya, i tak legko! 970 01:14:14,032 --> 01:14:15,867 Leg... 971 01:14:31,967 --> 01:14:36,053 - What the hell are you doing? - I might ask you the same question! 972 01:14:37,681 --> 01:14:39,891 - Who are you? - What?! 973 01:14:40,058 --> 01:14:42,894 - Get your clothes on. - Will you leave, please? 974 01:14:43,061 --> 01:14:45,897 - What? - You're in the wrong flat. 975 01:14:46,064 --> 01:14:48,107 This flat belongs to Patrick Balfour. 976 01:14:48,275 --> 01:14:51,861 He's in Hong Kong and he lent me the key. Now get out! 977 01:14:52,029 --> 01:14:54,697 But we leased it from the agents last weekend. 978 01:15:00,496 --> 01:15:04,081 Yes, well, obviously that changes things a bit. Um... 979 01:15:05,542 --> 01:15:07,960 Aren't you Archie Leach? 980 01:15:08,879 --> 01:15:09,879 What? 981 01:15:10,047 --> 01:15:12,715 You bought our house in Lissendon Gardens. 982 01:15:13,884 --> 01:15:16,427 Hazel and Ian Johnson. 983 01:15:18,514 --> 01:15:21,015 What a coincidence! 984 01:15:21,183 --> 01:15:23,935 Ha. How nice to see you. 985 01:15:43,455 --> 01:15:45,289 (dials number) 986 01:15:47,584 --> 01:15:49,669 (phone rings) 987 01:15:54,091 --> 01:15:57,718 - Hello? - Hello, Wanda. It's Archie. 988 01:15:57,886 --> 01:16:02,056 Listen... I can't see you any more. I've got to end it. I'm sorry. 989 01:16:03,016 --> 01:16:04,767 What? 990 01:16:05,561 --> 01:16:07,144 I'm sorry. 991 01:16:08,438 --> 01:16:10,523 - (hangs up) - Archie? 992 01:16:40,387 --> 01:16:42,179 Uh... 993 01:16:43,223 --> 01:16:45,683 - OK. - Oh, no, no. Please. 994 01:16:45,851 --> 01:16:48,811 - Look, I want to apologize. - I just finished it. 995 01:16:48,979 --> 01:16:51,147 OK, OK. Wait. Where are you going? 996 01:16:51,315 --> 01:16:54,859 - I wanna speak with you. - Will you leave me alone? 997 01:16:55,027 --> 01:16:58,362 - Otto, I've just ended it. - Wait! I wanna say I'm sorry! 998 01:16:58,530 --> 01:17:00,531 - It's all over, OK? - It's all right! 999 01:17:00,699 --> 01:17:04,702 - Oh, Jesus Christ! - Will you calm down? Shut up! 1000 01:17:05,621 --> 01:17:07,538 - Please believe me! - It's all right! 1001 01:17:07,706 --> 01:17:10,249 No, don't beat me up again. I've had a terrible day. 1002 01:17:10,417 --> 01:17:13,794 - Will you shut up?! - Oh, Jesus Christ, don't kill me! 1003 01:17:13,962 --> 01:17:15,504 Shut up, then. 1004 01:17:16,423 --> 01:17:17,882 OK. 1005 01:17:18,050 --> 01:17:23,679 Look, I just want to apologize, sincerely, for... What? 1006 01:17:23,847 --> 01:17:27,391 Well, when I dangled you out the window. I'm really, really... 1007 01:17:27,559 --> 01:17:29,518 It was not a nice thing to do. 1008 01:17:29,686 --> 01:17:33,397 Then when I attacked you in there, well, I'm really, really s... 1009 01:17:33,565 --> 01:17:36,984 How could I know you were robbing your own house? I was trying to help! 1010 01:17:37,152 --> 01:17:40,946 - Yes. Thanks. Thanks, Otto. - I wanted you to trust me. 1011 01:17:41,114 --> 01:17:44,075 Yeah. Please. It was my fault. It was my fault. 1012 01:17:44,242 --> 01:17:45,701 - That's true. - Yeah. 1013 01:17:45,869 --> 01:17:48,162 - Now, about my sister. - Otto... 1014 01:17:48,330 --> 01:17:50,247 Look, she's a very sexy girl. 1015 01:17:50,415 --> 01:17:52,958 I understand you wanting to play around with her. 1016 01:17:53,126 --> 01:17:56,504 It's OK. I was wrong. I'm sorry I was jealous. 1017 01:17:56,672 --> 01:18:01,550 Just go ahead. Pork away, pal. Fuck her blue. 1018 01:18:02,302 --> 01:18:05,429 I like you, Archie. I just wanna help. 1019 01:18:31,081 --> 01:18:32,623 (dog yaps) 1020 01:18:59,484 --> 01:19:01,610 (rumbling) 1021 01:19:11,913 --> 01:19:13,205 Oh, God! 1022 01:19:29,473 --> 01:19:31,557 (Ken groans) 1023 01:19:50,327 --> 01:19:52,745 (man) Send for an ambulance! 1024 01:20:10,013 --> 01:20:12,473 (chuckles) 1025 01:20:12,641 --> 01:20:14,725 She copped it! 1026 01:20:18,355 --> 01:20:21,482 I did it! 1027 01:20:21,650 --> 01:20:24,568 Unbe-fucking-lievable! 1028 01:20:24,736 --> 01:20:26,946 - Thomason! - Yeah? Oh. 1029 01:20:30,909 --> 01:20:33,369 You've done well, my son. 1030 01:20:34,329 --> 01:20:35,412 Now, here's the plan. 1031 01:20:35,580 --> 01:20:39,542 You get four tickets for this evening for Rio, first class. Then... 1032 01:20:39,709 --> 01:20:41,752 f-f-f... 1033 01:20:41,920 --> 01:20:44,588 Yeah, four. We get rid of Otto later. 1034 01:20:44,756 --> 01:20:47,716 Then back to the flat, pack, collect me. 1035 01:20:47,884 --> 01:20:51,428 Then to the Cathcart Towers Hotel to pick up the jewels. 1036 01:20:54,599 --> 01:20:59,103 Unbe-fucking-lievable! 1037 01:20:59,271 --> 01:21:00,521 Oi! Oi! 1038 01:21:01,356 --> 01:21:03,774 (Wanda hums the conga) 1039 01:21:03,942 --> 01:21:06,610 Oh, it's so exciting! I can't believe it! 1040 01:21:06,778 --> 01:21:08,612 He's s-s-safe. 1041 01:21:08,780 --> 01:21:11,907 - (phone rings) - Oh! I'm gonna be late for court. 1042 01:21:13,994 --> 01:21:16,078 H-Hello. Oh, hello, Otto. 1043 01:21:18,456 --> 01:21:21,792 No. She just... left. 1044 01:21:21,960 --> 01:21:24,086 Oh, and Otto... 1045 01:21:24,254 --> 01:21:26,630 You owe me a p-p-p... 1046 01:21:28,717 --> 01:21:33,387 - What? - You owe me a p-pound. 1047 01:21:35,098 --> 01:21:37,016 Not Granny? 1048 01:21:37,183 --> 01:21:41,437 Met with an accident. 1049 01:21:42,188 --> 01:21:44,273 Bullshit! You're lying! 1050 01:21:45,984 --> 01:21:48,652 - Dead? - Heart attack. 1051 01:21:53,491 --> 01:21:57,995 - I don't believe this. - So George'll be out this afternoon. 1052 01:21:58,163 --> 01:22:02,917 We all go up to Heathrow, collect the loot, and then vvroooom! 1053 01:22:03,084 --> 01:22:08,964 All thanks to me. 1054 01:22:10,008 --> 01:22:12,343 So the loot's at the airport, is it, Ken? 1055 01:22:22,896 --> 01:22:25,022 What's h-happening? 1056 01:22:26,024 --> 01:22:28,192 Well, Ken... 1057 01:22:28,360 --> 01:22:31,862 I'm going to ask you some questions... while I eat my chips. 1058 01:22:32,864 --> 01:22:34,990 First. Who was the philosopher 1059 01:22:35,158 --> 01:22:40,454 who developed the concept of the superman in Also sprach Zarathustra? 1060 01:22:42,916 --> 01:22:44,458 No? 1061 01:22:44,626 --> 01:22:48,045 That's a chip up the nose, I'm afraid. 1062 01:22:48,213 --> 01:22:51,090 Friedrich Nietzsche. Next. 1063 01:22:51,257 --> 01:22:55,135 In which book did Nietzsche claim that almost all higher culture 1064 01:22:55,303 --> 01:22:57,054 is based on cruelty? 1065 01:23:00,016 --> 01:23:04,186 - Are you thinking or in mid-stutter? - You're m-m-mad. 1066 01:23:05,355 --> 01:23:07,564 Beyond Good and Evil. 1067 01:23:09,401 --> 01:23:13,237 Guess I'll have to ask you an easy one, huh, Ken? OK. Um... 1068 01:23:13,905 --> 01:23:16,281 Let me think, let me think. Um... 1069 01:23:16,449 --> 01:23:18,158 Where are the diamonds? 1070 01:23:19,494 --> 01:23:23,372 I'll give you a clue. Somewhere around the airport. 1071 01:23:24,457 --> 01:23:26,417 I'm n-n-n... 1072 01:23:26,584 --> 01:23:28,252 No hassle. There's plenty of time. 1073 01:23:28,420 --> 01:23:31,714 I'll just sit here and eat my chips till you tell me. 1074 01:23:34,426 --> 01:23:38,929 The English contribution to world cuisine: the chip. 1075 01:23:40,140 --> 01:23:44,601 What do the English usually eat with chips to make them more interesting? 1076 01:23:46,438 --> 01:23:48,480 Wait a moment! 1077 01:23:49,607 --> 01:23:52,151 It's fish. Isn't it? 1078 01:23:56,781 --> 01:23:58,615 Oh! Here, boy. 1079 01:23:58,783 --> 01:24:01,160 Down the hatch. 1080 01:24:01,703 --> 01:24:04,246 (Ken gasps) 1081 01:24:04,414 --> 01:24:07,958 - Delicious! - You b-b-b... 1082 01:24:08,126 --> 01:24:11,003 Better eat the green one? OK. 1083 01:24:11,171 --> 01:24:13,213 What's this one's name? 1084 01:24:13,506 --> 01:24:17,259 Well, not Wanda, anyway. I'm going to call her Lunch. 1085 01:24:17,552 --> 01:24:19,845 Hello, Lunch. Hello! 1086 01:24:24,642 --> 01:24:26,602 Eww! 1087 01:24:26,770 --> 01:24:29,938 Avoid the green ones. They're not ripe yet. 1088 01:24:32,400 --> 01:24:36,612 Now, you were in court, Inspector, when the forensic evidence was read? 1089 01:24:36,780 --> 01:24:37,988 Yes, sir. 1090 01:24:38,156 --> 01:24:42,034 The fact that Mr. Thomason was installing windows the previous weekend 1091 01:24:42,202 --> 01:24:43,994 would account, would it not, Inspector, 1092 01:24:44,162 --> 01:24:47,831 for the presence of small particles of glass 1093 01:24:47,999 --> 01:24:50,084 on his trousers? 1094 01:24:51,669 --> 01:24:55,005 No hurry, Inspector. Please do take your time. 1095 01:25:02,138 --> 01:25:04,223 I'm almost full. 1096 01:25:05,850 --> 01:25:08,268 - Almost. - Stop! 1097 01:25:08,436 --> 01:25:10,521 Please, don't. 1098 01:25:11,022 --> 01:25:14,233 Come on, Wanda! Gullet time! 1099 01:25:16,945 --> 01:25:20,656 What are the names of those hotels by the airport? What are they? 1100 01:25:20,824 --> 01:25:24,201 The Airway Sheraton? The Post House? The Cathcart Towers? 1101 01:25:24,369 --> 01:25:26,578 The Cathcart Towers?! Yes?! 1102 01:25:28,414 --> 01:25:30,749 Mm? Mm? 1103 01:25:31,167 --> 01:25:33,752 - Yes. - In a safe deposit box? 1104 01:25:34,337 --> 01:25:36,672 - Yes. - (muffled) Where's the key? 1105 01:25:36,840 --> 01:25:38,966 - What? - Where's the key? 1106 01:25:39,134 --> 01:25:41,677 It's in the t-t-tank. 1107 01:25:43,471 --> 01:25:45,013 Where? Where? 1108 01:25:45,181 --> 01:25:47,182 In the t-t-t... 1109 01:25:47,350 --> 01:25:49,226 Treasure chest! 1110 01:25:53,690 --> 01:25:55,399 Where?! 1111 01:25:56,401 --> 01:25:58,360 Where? 1112 01:26:00,488 --> 01:26:04,741 You m-m-murdering... 1113 01:26:04,909 --> 01:26:07,202 I'm g-g-gonna k-k-k... 1114 01:26:07,370 --> 01:26:09,413 I'll kill you! I'll kill you! 1115 01:26:12,375 --> 01:26:15,210 Sorry, Ken, but your answer was incorrect. 1116 01:26:16,754 --> 01:26:19,715 Still, you really did think it was in there, didn't you? 1117 01:26:19,883 --> 01:26:21,508 (snorts) 1118 01:26:21,676 --> 01:26:23,093 What? 1119 01:26:24,429 --> 01:26:25,387 Oh. 1120 01:26:25,555 --> 01:26:27,556 (inhales desperately) 1121 01:26:33,438 --> 01:26:35,397 - Hello? - I know where the diamonds are. 1122 01:26:37,525 --> 01:26:39,651 - Where? - Where's the key? 1123 01:26:43,615 --> 01:26:46,867 - I've got it. - How soon can you get to George's? 1124 01:26:48,453 --> 01:26:50,454 You are Wanda Gershwitz, 1125 01:26:50,622 --> 01:26:54,583 of Kipling Mansions, Murray Road, London, West 9? 1126 01:26:55,793 --> 01:26:58,295 - Yes. - Now, will you tell the court, please, 1127 01:26:58,463 --> 01:27:00,923 how do you know the defendant? 1128 01:27:01,090 --> 01:27:03,634 We've had a relationship for two years. 1129 01:27:04,636 --> 01:27:06,303 Relationship? 1130 01:27:07,639 --> 01:27:09,306 We're lovers, your lord. 1131 01:27:10,475 --> 01:27:15,562 (clears throat) Miss Gershwitz, on the fourth of March of this year, 1132 01:27:15,730 --> 01:27:17,814 in the morning, where were you? 1133 01:27:17,982 --> 01:27:21,568 - I was at the apartment at Murray Road. - Were you by yourself, 1134 01:27:21,736 --> 01:27:24,029 or was there anyone else present? 1135 01:27:24,197 --> 01:27:27,491 - No. Somebody else was there. - Who was that? 1136 01:27:27,659 --> 01:27:30,869 - My brother. - And did your...? 1137 01:27:34,415 --> 01:27:36,500 Your brother? 1138 01:27:38,628 --> 01:27:40,671 My brother. 1139 01:27:41,673 --> 01:27:43,298 Yes. 1140 01:27:44,384 --> 01:27:49,346 Yes, and... are you quite sure it was your brother? 1141 01:27:49,514 --> 01:27:53,225 Mr. Leach, I'm sure Ms. Gershwitz can recognize her brother. 1142 01:27:53,393 --> 01:27:55,978 She's had a relationship with him all her life. 1143 01:27:56,145 --> 01:27:58,146 (chuckles) 1144 01:27:58,314 --> 01:27:59,856 Much obliged, my lord. 1145 01:28:00,024 --> 01:28:04,194 Was there anyone else present that morning? 1146 01:28:04,362 --> 01:28:06,280 - George was there. - Thank you. 1147 01:28:06,447 --> 01:28:08,824 - But he left about five to seven. - Wanda! 1148 01:28:10,368 --> 01:28:18,292 I wonder... 1149 01:28:26,884 --> 01:28:28,719 Yes, Mr. Leach? 1150 01:28:29,220 --> 01:28:32,139 I Wendy... I Wanda... I wonder... I w-w-w... 1151 01:28:32,307 --> 01:28:35,767 Wh-when you say five to seven, 1152 01:28:35,935 --> 01:28:40,731 Ms. Gershwitz... how can you be so sure? 1153 01:28:41,190 --> 01:28:45,193 Oh, I looked at the clock. 'Cause I was saying to myself, 1154 01:28:45,361 --> 01:28:48,530 "Where could he be going at five to seven with that shotgun?" 1155 01:28:48,698 --> 01:28:50,699 Darling! 1156 01:28:50,867 --> 01:28:52,868 Mr. Leach. "Darling"? 1157 01:28:53,036 --> 01:28:57,539 - Yes, dear? - You bitch! You fucking bitch! 1158 01:28:57,707 --> 01:29:00,375 (Wanda screams) 1159 01:29:01,419 --> 01:29:03,503 (Judge) Restrain that man! 1160 01:29:09,260 --> 01:29:12,596 - Restrain this man. - Come here, you bastard! 1161 01:29:12,764 --> 01:29:15,932 Clear the court! I'm adjourning this matter for an hour. 1162 01:29:16,100 --> 01:29:19,061 Clear the court! Clear the court! 1163 01:29:27,195 --> 01:29:30,280 Clear the court! Clear the court! Clear the court! 1164 01:29:30,448 --> 01:29:33,158 Officers, arrest that man! 1165 01:29:38,623 --> 01:29:41,625 Clear the court! Clear the court! 1166 01:29:52,553 --> 01:29:55,138 (Wendy) Bloody hell! 1167 01:29:55,306 --> 01:29:58,308 It's my husband. He's been hit. 1168 01:29:58,476 --> 01:30:01,895 Ah, you made it. Good. Bit of a knock, I'm afraid. 1169 01:30:03,147 --> 01:30:06,066 I have never been so humiliated in my life. 1170 01:30:06,234 --> 01:30:09,694 You can stick this marriage right in your bottom! 1171 01:30:09,862 --> 01:30:12,280 I'll see you in court. 1172 01:30:20,790 --> 01:30:22,165 Yes. 1173 01:30:23,918 --> 01:30:25,168 Well. 1174 01:30:26,087 --> 01:30:27,587 That's it, then. 1175 01:30:31,717 --> 01:30:33,051 - George? - What? 1176 01:30:33,219 --> 01:30:37,681 - We've got to talk. - Tell those pigs to fuck off! 1177 01:30:37,849 --> 01:30:39,975 Fuck off, pigs. 1178 01:30:42,019 --> 01:30:44,855 Did you hear what I said? Fuck off. 1179 01:30:50,778 --> 01:30:53,613 - What's she up to, George? - What are you up to? 1180 01:30:53,781 --> 01:30:57,701 You called her darling... and Wanda. 1181 01:30:57,869 --> 01:31:02,289 I've been helping her get her evidence straight, you burk. It slipped out. 1182 01:31:02,457 --> 01:31:04,749 - You been coaching her? - What do you think?! 1183 01:31:04,917 --> 01:31:08,044 We've got ten minutes. They're gonna find you guilty, right? 1184 01:31:08,212 --> 01:31:11,548 Plead guilty, tell them where the loot is, you may get away with... 1185 01:31:11,716 --> 01:31:14,176 ...eight years, out in five and a half. 1186 01:31:14,343 --> 01:31:16,761 What if I tell 'em about Otto... and Wanda? 1187 01:31:17,805 --> 01:31:19,055 - They both did it? - Yeah. 1188 01:31:19,223 --> 01:31:22,142 Great. All right. Maybe six years, out in four? 1189 01:31:23,019 --> 01:31:25,061 So where are the diamonds? 1190 01:31:26,272 --> 01:31:30,317 - Where's Bartlett? - He's upstairs. So, where are they? 1191 01:31:31,152 --> 01:31:33,987 Tell Bartlett Ken knows where they are. 1192 01:31:35,406 --> 01:31:38,742 George, it'd be a lot quicker if you told me. 1193 01:31:40,912 --> 01:31:43,079 OK. I'll tell Bartlett. 1194 01:31:43,247 --> 01:31:46,249 - Where's Ken? - He's at the flat. 1195 01:31:49,670 --> 01:31:52,214 (Wanda wails) 1196 01:31:52,381 --> 01:31:56,092 (tearfully) Thank you for all your help. I'll be right out. 1197 01:32:10,107 --> 01:32:11,608 Taxi! Taxi! 1198 01:32:11,776 --> 01:32:12,901 Please. Shit! 1199 01:32:13,069 --> 01:32:15,153 - Taxi! - Come on. 1200 01:32:15,321 --> 01:32:16,446 - What? - Let's go. 1201 01:32:16,614 --> 01:32:18,073 - Where? - Buenos Aires. 1202 01:32:18,241 --> 01:32:21,409 - What? - We're going to George's flat first. 1203 01:32:21,577 --> 01:32:23,286 Get in. 1204 01:32:26,624 --> 01:32:28,542 - Got your passport? - Yeah. 1205 01:32:28,709 --> 01:32:31,002 Check the briefcase for mine. 1206 01:32:31,170 --> 01:32:33,880 Get your head down. 1207 01:32:38,427 --> 01:32:42,138 So, you robbed the jeweler's, turned one lover over to the police, 1208 01:32:42,306 --> 01:32:47,143 kept one to help you find the diamonds, and when he does, you commit perjury. 1209 01:32:47,311 --> 01:32:51,022 - Everybody does it in America. - Not in this country they don't! 1210 01:32:51,190 --> 01:32:54,484 Like nobody lies in England. Like Margaret Thatcher never lies. 1211 01:32:54,652 --> 01:32:58,154 - You lied to me from the start. - You just wanted to get me into bed. 1212 01:32:58,322 --> 01:33:00,156 I fell in love with you! 1213 01:33:06,163 --> 01:33:07,998 How come you dumped me, then? 1214 01:33:09,500 --> 01:33:11,501 I wasn't rich enough. Remember? 1215 01:33:23,139 --> 01:33:25,390 - Say something in Russian. - No! 1216 01:33:30,688 --> 01:33:33,773 - What are you thinking? - I'm trying to think of a reason 1217 01:33:33,941 --> 01:33:36,359 why I should take you to South America with me. 1218 01:33:37,278 --> 01:33:41,948 How about... because I have the key to the safety deposit box? 1219 01:33:43,743 --> 01:33:45,452 - That's a good reason! - Good reason. 1220 01:33:49,707 --> 01:33:52,375 - What do we do about Otto? - I'll handle Otto. 1221 01:33:52,543 --> 01:33:54,794 Be careful, he's dangerous. 1222 01:33:54,962 --> 01:33:56,963 So am I. 1223 01:33:57,131 --> 01:33:59,215 Keep it running. 1224 01:34:01,761 --> 01:34:03,386 Why'd you bring him? 1225 01:34:03,554 --> 01:34:06,348 - No! - I'm beginning to think you like him! 1226 01:34:06,515 --> 01:34:07,682 Let's get the diamonds! 1227 01:34:08,559 --> 01:34:09,851 Ken? 1228 01:34:10,019 --> 01:34:12,062 Are you Ke...? 1229 01:34:13,773 --> 01:34:16,274 How do you do? I'm George's barrister. 1230 01:34:17,193 --> 01:34:19,486 - What's happened? - (crash) 1231 01:34:20,071 --> 01:34:22,364 - Oh, my God... - (Otto) Asshole! 1232 01:34:23,282 --> 01:34:25,617 - What the bloody hell do you think...? - (gunshot) 1233 01:34:25,785 --> 01:34:27,786 All right, then. 1234 01:34:27,953 --> 01:34:29,746 Archie! 1235 01:34:31,582 --> 01:34:33,917 Where have they gone? Quick! 1236 01:34:34,085 --> 01:34:36,753 They've g... They've g... They've g... 1237 01:34:36,921 --> 01:34:38,838 What? 1238 01:34:39,632 --> 01:34:41,925 Are you all right? 1239 01:34:42,093 --> 01:34:45,303 - Where have they gone? - They've gone to the Ca-ca-ca... 1240 01:34:45,471 --> 01:34:47,263 - Are you ill? - No, no, no. 1241 01:34:47,431 --> 01:34:49,432 - What? - The Ca-ca-ca... 1242 01:34:49,600 --> 01:34:53,269 - Have you got a stutter? - Y-y-yeah. A b-b-bit. 1243 01:34:53,437 --> 01:34:57,482 OK, fine. Don't worry, don't worry. Do you know where they've gone? 1244 01:34:57,650 --> 01:34:59,901 - Y-y-y... - Fine, fine. Where? 1245 01:35:00,945 --> 01:35:02,904 The Ca... 1246 01:35:03,072 --> 01:35:04,823 Hotel. 1247 01:35:04,990 --> 01:35:07,117 Hotel? Which hotel? 1248 01:35:08,953 --> 01:35:10,495 Ca... 1249 01:35:10,663 --> 01:35:12,622 The Ca... The Ca... 1250 01:35:12,790 --> 01:35:14,290 - The... - Go on. 1251 01:35:14,458 --> 01:35:16,042 Ca-ca-ca... 1252 01:35:16,210 --> 01:35:19,212 All right. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 1253 01:35:19,380 --> 01:35:21,506 Slowly. Very slowly. 1254 01:35:22,049 --> 01:35:23,675 Slowly. 1255 01:35:25,594 --> 01:35:26,970 The C... 1256 01:35:27,763 --> 01:35:29,222 The Ca... 1257 01:35:30,850 --> 01:35:32,976 The C... 1258 01:35:33,144 --> 01:35:34,352 The Ca... 1259 01:35:34,520 --> 01:35:37,355 - No hurry. - The C-C-Ca... 1260 01:35:37,523 --> 01:35:40,442 - Sing it. Sing. - # The Ca... 1261 01:35:41,652 --> 01:35:44,779 # The Ca... The Ca... The Ca... 1262 01:35:46,866 --> 01:35:48,742 - # Ca... - Plenty of time. 1263 01:35:48,909 --> 01:35:50,827 # Ca... 1264 01:35:50,995 --> 01:35:53,121 # Ca... The Ca... 1265 01:35:53,289 --> 01:35:55,999 Oh, come on! Sorry. I'm sorry. 1266 01:35:56,167 --> 01:35:58,752 Um... All right, wait. 1267 01:35:58,919 --> 01:36:01,004 # The Ca... The... 1268 01:36:03,549 --> 01:36:05,633 Here. Write it. 1269 01:36:16,771 --> 01:36:19,314 - Cathcart Towers Hotel? - Cathcart Towers Hotel. 1270 01:36:19,482 --> 01:36:21,900 Where is it? 1271 01:36:22,067 --> 01:36:23,943 Ken, where is it? Where?! 1272 01:36:24,111 --> 01:36:26,196 He-He-He... 1273 01:36:26,363 --> 01:36:28,198 Here. Here. Again. No? 1274 01:36:28,365 --> 01:36:30,408 (Ken whistles) 1275 01:36:34,079 --> 01:36:35,789 (Ken makes whirring noises) 1276 01:36:35,956 --> 01:36:36,956 Heathrow Airport. 1277 01:36:48,302 --> 01:36:50,220 - (car horn) - Hey! 1278 01:36:50,387 --> 01:36:52,055 What's the idea? You can't stay... 1279 01:36:52,223 --> 01:36:54,474 Frightfully sorry. Take it, it's yours. 1280 01:37:02,525 --> 01:37:05,527 Thank you so much. Uh... British Airways to Rio? 1281 01:37:05,694 --> 01:37:08,446 - Rio? Terminal Four, sir. - Thank you. 1282 01:37:15,287 --> 01:37:17,080 Excuse me, sir. Is this your vehicle? 1283 01:37:17,248 --> 01:37:19,290 With you in a moment. I'll be right back. 1284 01:37:21,377 --> 01:37:23,795 Aisle or window? Smoking or nonsmoking? 1285 01:37:24,713 --> 01:37:27,590 - What was the middle one? - Anything in nonsmoking. 1286 01:37:27,758 --> 01:37:30,218 Gate 14 is boarding now. 1287 01:37:52,533 --> 01:37:53,908 Rio! 1288 01:37:55,077 --> 01:37:57,912 Otto, don't look back. There's a cop right behind us. 1289 01:37:58,080 --> 01:37:59,998 Quick! 1290 01:38:03,544 --> 01:38:06,546 - Yes, we can just do it, Mr. Leach. - Great. 1291 01:38:06,714 --> 01:38:08,506 - Luggage? - (thud) 1292 01:38:11,635 --> 01:38:13,511 Don't really need any. 1293 01:38:13,679 --> 01:38:15,096 - Gate 14. - Thank you. 1294 01:38:17,141 --> 01:38:19,267 Ciao, stupidissimo. 1295 01:38:25,566 --> 01:38:28,234 (Ken grunts and groans and wails) 1296 01:38:38,996 --> 01:38:41,706 (gunshots) 1297 01:38:49,381 --> 01:38:52,050 Come on, Archie. Pick up the phone. 1298 01:38:59,600 --> 01:39:03,019 Sir! Airport security. May I see your boarding pass, please? 1299 01:39:03,187 --> 01:39:05,271 Oh, yes. Certainly, certainly. 1300 01:39:06,065 --> 01:39:08,608 Very good. Would you step over here, please? 1301 01:39:08,776 --> 01:39:11,527 - Um, yes, of course. - Oh, look! The Queen. 1302 01:39:17,117 --> 01:39:20,578 OK, OK, OK, OK. Don't get excited. OK, OK, OK. 1303 01:39:23,040 --> 01:39:25,625 Oh, it's you! I was actually worried there. 1304 01:39:25,793 --> 01:39:27,502 - Keep your hands up. - No! 1305 01:39:27,670 --> 01:39:29,712 - Put 'em up! - I'll make a deal with you. 1306 01:39:29,880 --> 01:39:33,508 - I'll put one up. - Put the other one up! 1307 01:39:34,802 --> 01:39:37,053 Which looks better? 1308 01:39:37,221 --> 01:39:39,055 I'm warning you, Otto. 1309 01:39:39,848 --> 01:39:43,726 What are you gonna do? Shoot me? Gun me down in cold blood like a dog? 1310 01:39:43,894 --> 01:39:47,730 Hey! If you wanna settle something with me, why don't you fight me? 1311 01:39:47,898 --> 01:39:51,067 You're a man, aren't you? Let's fight like men! Come on! 1312 01:39:53,028 --> 01:39:55,113 - All right. - All right, then. 1313 01:39:55,948 --> 01:39:57,865 - OK. - OK. 1314 01:39:58,951 --> 01:40:02,120 - You look good, Arch. - I used to box for Oxford. 1315 01:40:02,287 --> 01:40:05,164 Oh, yeah? Well, I used to kill for the CIA. 1316 01:40:05,332 --> 01:40:07,959 Now, get your hands up. 1317 01:40:08,127 --> 01:40:09,460 No. 1318 01:40:11,338 --> 01:40:14,132 (chuckles) You spineless bimbo. 1319 01:40:14,925 --> 01:40:16,384 Now, out. 1320 01:40:20,889 --> 01:40:23,266 I'm gonna have to shoot you now. 1321 01:40:23,434 --> 01:40:25,977 But I've got a little time before my plane leaves 1322 01:40:26,145 --> 01:40:29,814 and I'm longing to humiliate you. So get in that barrel. 1323 01:40:32,818 --> 01:40:35,445 - What? - In the barrel. 1324 01:40:38,824 --> 01:40:40,742 Right. 1325 01:40:43,203 --> 01:40:46,456 You English, you think you're so superior, don't you? 1326 01:40:46,749 --> 01:40:49,042 Well, you're the filth of the planet. 1327 01:40:49,209 --> 01:40:53,921 A bunch of pompous, badly-dressed, poverty-stricken, 1328 01:40:54,089 --> 01:40:56,674 sexually-repressed football hooligans. 1329 01:40:58,802 --> 01:41:00,428 Goodbye, Archie. 1330 01:41:00,971 --> 01:41:03,014 At least we're not irretrievably vulgar. 1331 01:41:03,182 --> 01:41:05,475 You know your problem? You don't like winners. 1332 01:41:05,642 --> 01:41:07,769 - Winners? - Yeah. 1333 01:41:07,936 --> 01:41:10,813 - Winners. - Winners like... North Vietnam? 1334 01:41:10,981 --> 01:41:12,899 Shut up! 1335 01:41:13,067 --> 01:41:15,485 We did not lose Vietnam! It was a tie! 1336 01:41:15,652 --> 01:41:18,488 (American accent) They kicked some ass there. 1337 01:41:18,655 --> 01:41:23,326 Boy, they whupped your hide real good! 1338 01:41:23,869 --> 01:41:25,453 - No, they didn't. - Yes, they did. 1339 01:41:25,621 --> 01:41:28,247 - Oh, no, they didn't. - Oh, yes, they did. 1340 01:41:28,415 --> 01:41:31,042 Oh, no, they... Shut up! 1341 01:41:32,294 --> 01:41:34,837 - Goodbye, Archie. - Gonna shoot me? 1342 01:41:35,005 --> 01:41:38,508 (English accent) Uh, yes. Yes, 'fraid so, old chap. Sorry! 1343 01:41:38,926 --> 01:41:40,510 Look, Otto! Look! 1344 01:41:47,893 --> 01:41:49,769 Rev-v-venge! 1345 01:41:49,937 --> 01:41:52,063 (laughs) 1346 01:41:53,607 --> 01:41:57,276 It's K-K-Ken, c-c-coming to k-k-kill me. 1347 01:41:58,821 --> 01:42:01,864 How are you gonna c-c-catch me, K-K-Ken? 1348 01:42:04,284 --> 01:42:06,702 Now, where was I? Oh, yeah. 1349 01:42:08,747 --> 01:42:10,665 Shit! God! 1350 01:42:12,251 --> 01:42:15,503 Stupid fucking limey cement! Ugh! 1351 01:42:22,970 --> 01:42:24,720 Ken! Ken! 1352 01:42:24,888 --> 01:42:27,390 Wait. Wait, Ken! Kenny! K... 1353 01:42:27,558 --> 01:42:30,184 - May I call you Kenny? - Remember Wanda! 1354 01:42:30,352 --> 01:42:33,062 I got the deal of a lifetime! 50-50, you and me. What do you say? 1355 01:42:33,230 --> 01:42:37,233 OK, OK, OK. 60-40. That's my final offer. 1356 01:42:37,401 --> 01:42:40,778 - Revenge! - Wait. I got an idea. You take it all. 1357 01:42:40,946 --> 01:42:43,614 Yeah. Here's my boarding pass. Ken! 1358 01:42:43,907 --> 01:42:46,409 I'm gonna... I'm gonna k-k-kill you. 1359 01:42:46,577 --> 01:42:49,954 OK, fine. Fine, Ken. Come at me. Gimme your best shot. 1360 01:42:50,289 --> 01:42:53,499 Go on, Ken! You don't have the guts. Admit it! 1361 01:42:55,544 --> 01:42:58,421 OK, you have the guts. Good. Wait. 1362 01:42:58,589 --> 01:43:00,089 Death! 1363 01:43:00,257 --> 01:43:03,259 All right. I'm sorry I ate your fish, OK? 1364 01:43:03,427 --> 01:43:06,345 - I'm sorry! - Revenge! 1365 01:43:06,513 --> 01:43:08,598 Jesus! I said I'm sorry. What the fu...? 1366 01:43:08,765 --> 01:43:11,058 (screams) 1367 01:43:13,478 --> 01:43:14,854 Got him! 1368 01:43:25,782 --> 01:43:28,451 Got you again! You bastard! 1369 01:43:29,119 --> 01:43:32,079 Hey. I've lost my stutter. 1370 01:43:32,247 --> 01:43:35,249 It's gone. I can speak. 1371 01:43:35,417 --> 01:43:37,627 How much wood could a woodchuck chuck 1372 01:43:37,794 --> 01:43:39,795 if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 1373 01:43:41,465 --> 01:43:44,425 Oh, good afternoon, sir. Boarding pass? 1374 01:43:52,017 --> 01:43:54,101 Buongiorno, signorina. 1375 01:44:02,778 --> 01:44:04,820 Now, listen. Two things. One... 1376 01:44:06,156 --> 01:44:09,659 Behave yourself from now on, or I'll break your neck. OK? 1377 01:44:10,661 --> 01:44:11,869 Two... 1378 01:44:13,163 --> 01:44:14,747 Gorbachov. 1379 01:44:14,915 --> 01:44:16,666 Glasnost. 1380 01:44:16,833 --> 01:44:19,335 Molotov. 1381 01:44:19,503 --> 01:44:21,379 Blinis. 1382 01:44:21,546 --> 01:44:23,756 Uh... Lenin. 1383 01:44:24,591 --> 01:44:25,925 (Archie) Pushkin. 1384 01:44:26,093 --> 01:44:29,512 - Chicken Kiev. - Good. Dostoyevsky. 1385 01:44:30,931 --> 01:44:32,682 Roubles. 1386 01:44:34,268 --> 01:44:36,060 (Archie) Vladivostok. 1387 01:44:36,228 --> 01:44:38,312 (engines roar) 1388 01:44:40,482 --> 01:44:43,192 Assho-o-o-o-o-o-o-ole! 1389 01:44:44,305 --> 01:44:50,324 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org